Where and how to meet a man for a serious relationship? Where to meet a serious man: "fishy" places and tips for a successful acquaintance
Published for preview. This book should be read and reread even if you are already married. Get the book How to Get Married, bookmark the most important chapters so you can come back to it more than once or twice.
Margaret Kent "How to Get Married"Chapter 3
How and where to meet men
Now you have become more sociable and you can take the first step - to meet men. Your ideal spouse is hardly one man in a hundred, rather one in a thousand, so you will have to get acquainted with many men in order to find your chosen one.
Act like a tourist
I have a friend who loves to travel. During her foreign trips, she does not hesitate to approach any man to find out the way, talk on general topics and ask him to accompany her. She may ask the man to talk about customs, ideals, and culture. When she is a foreigner in a foreign country, she is outside the influence of the illogical rules of her culture. She does not seek intimacy or marriage, therefore, when talking, she feels free. She looks at every man like a book, reading which, you can learn something interesting.
This technique works so well that she meets the most attractive men who seem to be inaccessible to women in this country.
However, at home, she was tongue-tied. She remembered the ease with which she spent time abroad, and decided that since the tourist appearance helps her to become more talkative, then she must be a "tourist" here too. Now she walks with a camera and looks like a tourist, which gives her a reason to turn to anyone under any pretext. Men are very positive about her initiative.
Greetings
The first thing you should do is greet every man where you live, work, shop, do your business, and have fun. Greet every man if he is not a criminal.
Many women cannot approach a man and say in a casual way: "You seem to be an interesting person, and I would love to talk to you." Society has taught them not to be the first to approach men they might like. They are forced to respect the accepted framework and use "decent" channels of acquaintance with men, while closing themselves in a narrow circle with a small probability of meeting new men.
It takes some courage to generate interest and make contact. Fear not - you can! Most men will respond favorably to your friendliness and start a conversation themselves or give you the opportunity. The key is very simple - a smile and a kind word.
After greeting
Your first greeting and conversation with a man will take ten to fifteen minutes. Ask him to tell you about himself. For example, if he recently arrived in your city, you can ask the following questions:
1. What brings you to our city?
2. What did you like the most?
3. Is the city very different from yours?
4. How long do you plan to stay here?
5. Did you manage to find new friends?
6. What interesting places have you seen here?
7. How do you spend your free time?
8. Do you often go home?
9. Do friends from your city often visit you?
10. Has the city not deceived your expectations?
Ask questions that require clarification, not a monosyllabic answer. Make the man feel free to talk about himself, because in the first conversation he will probably show you how unique or unlike other men he thinks he is. In this cursory conversation, he will bring a dozen or two facts about himself, and you should try to remember them.
Find some circumstance or their confluence that, in your opinion, distinguishes him from other men. If he seems interesting to you, tell him about it and explain why you think so. After that, make it clear where he can see you again. Say, “I usually dine here on Tuesdays and Fridays. Maybe we'll talk again next Friday. "
If he seemed uninteresting to you, say goodbye to him. You need to broaden your horizons and get to know men as much as possible, but you also need to start the selection process as soon as possible.
Exchange of phone numbers
If a man asks for your phone number, ask for his number too. Don't give your phone to a man who won't give his. Be even more careful: only provide your work phone number. After finding out his number, call. Check that this is actually his number before you date him. Meet first in the daytime and in public.
Set aside more intimate encounters until you are more confident in the man and how you feel about him.
Look for allies
Working together can significantly increase the number of men you meet and your chances of meeting the right one. Maintain relationships with other single women, especially those who are not attracted to men of your type: they are not your rivals. Your girlfriends can be good search allies.
Here are some of the benefits of strengthening relationships with girlfriends.:
1. Self-affirmation. Your morale and self-esteem may suffer from your interactions with the outside world, but here your friends can be good support for you.
2. Strategy. You can discuss specific strategies and techniques with your friends. Much of what you will learn as you read this book, such as asking questions and influencing men, takes thought and experience. Your girlfriends can be of great help to you.
3. Exchange of information. If you meet a man and determine that he is not suitable for you, save his phone number. Write something about him on the back of his card. You are now ready to exchange numbers with other women in your circle.
It can also be helpful to work with single men who are not suitable for you as a spouse. They may want to introduce you to their friends - and get to know your girlfriends. Get men to reach out to you
If you want to meet a man, you must either be available or take the initiative into your own hands. The first is much easier. Essentially, “approachability” is the main strategy when meeting men. In everyday life, you are surrounded by many men, and you do not even know about their existence. Some of them, perhaps, look at you adoringly, but are afraid to speak to you, as you seem inaccessible to them.
Some women get to know men easily, others don't. Some women go to parties, clubs, social work and do not meet men. For others, not a single trip to the store is complete without men throwing loving glances at them or talking to them. The difference is that one woman is available and the other is not.
The man is afraid of rejection
Men are not brave when they have to approach a woman they really like. A man is much more likely to approach a woman whom he considers not very attractive than to one whom he is fascinated with. He will lose less if the first rejects him. That is why these simpletons are married, and a lonely dreamer as wonderful as you.
Men may be brave on the battlefield and ambitious at work, but they fear female rejection. Yes, they can avoid you for fear of rejection.
A man's image of himself, including his own masculinity, is formed shortly after he reaches puberty, and this image rarely changes. Even twenty years later, after a successful career, this self-esteem remains unchanged, and for most men it is greatly underestimated when they have to meet women.
The man who seems to you to be a tall and handsome stranger is just a trembling fourteen-year-old at heart, preoccupied with the defects of his face, a breaking voice and your refusal.
If in your youth no boy asked you to dance at a school party, you would probably feel that you were not noticed. But imagine a boy with a very vulnerable pride who is forced to invite a girl to dance under the gaze of hundreds of people. If the girl refuses, he does not just feel unnoticed. He is rejected. Refusal is a blow for him, because it is perceived as a public humiliation.
What is this young man doing to avoid rejection? He suits only those girls who look friendly and willingly meet his glances. When it comes to dating women, men behave in the same way as in their youth. They are suitable for women who, as they think, will not reject them.
Friendliness and availability
Consider that every man is worth a friendly word. This attitude will minimize men's fear of rejection. A simple “hello”, spoken with a smile and cordiality to any man, be it your courier or a lawyer, will build your reputation as a sociable person. It will be easier for men to get to know you.
This does not mean that you should hint at possible closeness, make eyes. You will become available just smiling and exchanging pleasantries, expressing recognition to the interlocutor something like this: "Always glad to see you."
Treat every man in your life this way. You will get into the habit of giving men the joy of meeting you, you will feel more confident in a male company.
As a result, attractive men will speak to you, including those whom you considered inaccessible or who did not exist for you at all.
Imagine that you are at a party and you are attracted to a nice young man named Karl. You want to dance with him. Therefore, when El comes up to you and invites you to dance, you say no to him, wanting to remain free for Karl. When Bill invites you, you refuse him for the same reason.
Do you think that Karl, who saw you reject two men, would want to risk being rejected too? Naturally not! But if you accept Al and Bill's invitations, Karl may have the courage to come up to you.
You may be afraid that the reputation of the outgoing person, the availability will attract many men, but not the one you want. Do not worry.
Your ideal considers himself superior to other men. For this reason, he will not approach you if he is not sure of a favorable reception. In the end, he is afraid that if you reject him, then people will find out about it, and this will turn out to be public humiliation for him. However, if your chosen one sees that you are nice to all men, he will rush into battle.
Preconditions
What if you're particularly picky? For example, you decided that you need a man of a certain profession, certain hobbies, nationality, religion?
Agree that your preconditions severely limit the number of men you can meet. Since you, of course, will also look for certain emotional or physical qualities, your ideal spouse may turn out to be even rarer than one in a thousand, which was discussed above.
If you don't give up on these preconditions, go where men meet your needs, be it a professional organization, a sports center, or a national club. However, when you are there, remember to be friendly with everyone.
Regardless of which company you choose for your search for a spouse, never act arrogantly in it. Smile and greet all men as well as women. Where to meet men
No man will knock on your door and offer to marry him. If you want a man, take the initiative. Go where there are men, but choose places that don't work against you.
Men have their own ideas about where their wives can be and what to do. They extend this idea to their future wives. You can meet men in different places, but some of them reduce your chances of marrying the person you meet there. Here are two typical examples.
Bars
The bar is one of the worst places to meet a man you would like to marry. He is almost certainly not there, and even if he is, he does not at all expect to find his wife here. Most men do not see their wives as regulars in bars and are unlikely to marry the women they meet in bars.
This is where the age difference comes into play. Older men are more likely to perceive bars negatively. There are also national differences. Irish, German and English are far better at bars than Italians, Hispanics and Jews.
The type of bar also plays a role. For example, dating in a sophisticated bar in midtown Manhattan is acceptable, but not in a typical Brooklyn or Bronx bar. There are regional differences as well as differences related to education and social status. But in any case, bars are hardly a suitable place to meet, because many people behave there unnaturally, which is exacerbated by the effects of alcohol.
If you still prefer to meet men in bars, do it after work, not late at night. Otherwise, you can spend many hours with someone who won't even remember you the next day.
Churches
Church can be a good place to meet, but only if you are very religious and insist on marrying your fellow believer. Otherwise, churches and other places of worship are suitable for acquaintance only on the condition that they are completely open and do not belong to one or another sect.
Twenty places to meet men
Bars and churches are among the most common places to meet. Since these are not the best places to find a future spouse, where should you look for one? Some of the places in this list may strike you as unexpected.
1. Your job. Start with men at work, but don't stop there. Meet men through work and work, including suppliers and clients. The key to meeting men is to have an approach and take the initiative in your own hands.
2. Bookstore. It is much easier to identify a man's interests if you meet him in a bookstore. In addition, there is a chance to meet the best male representatives there. Don't be too shy or humble. A bookstore is not a library. Ask him what books he can recommend. Plus, men looking for interesting women know they can be found in bookstores.
3. Supermarkets. Come to the store in the early evening when many men are out shopping. Get help if you can't get the item off the top shelf but don't look awkward. Better yet, give him the opportunity to ask you for help.
4. Self-service laundries. Evenings and weekends are the best times. Bring more bleach, washing powder: men forget that even when they go to the laundry! Bring light drinks with you: Laundries are steamy and rarely aired. If you notice an interesting man, ask him to change a coin to turn on the machines, then, taking a change, offer him water.
5. Libraries. If there is no good bookstore nearby, try going to the library. In a large library you can always find literature to your liking - and men. The main advantage of a library over a bookstore is the ability to sit down and meet men on the go. Visit the periodicals hall: the atmosphere here is the most informal and best conducive to conversation.
6. Bowling alley. This game has many advantages over other sports. You can play it all year round, in any weather. And inexpensive. In addition, the bowling alley is easier to socialize than other sports facilities. Experienced players live side by side with beginners, the skill is completely different. So it's easy to make new acquaintances here.
7. Lounges at airports. You don't need first class tickets to meet male passengers. If your budget allows, join an aviation club and use your membership card even if you are not flying. Men are less constrained when talking to a "fellow traveler."
8. Travel. As a tourist, meet men wherever you go. Best of all where there are few tourists. More attention will be paid to you. By traveling in a group, you can meet even more men.
9. Polyclinic. When you go to see a doctor, you have the opportunity to meet men in the waiting room. But forget about this method of dating when you go to the midwife or gynecologist.
10. Public and political organizations. Public associations and political parties can take a lot of time and effort, but they provide a real opportunity to meet many interesting men. However, it may turn out that after a while you will meet the same people all the time.
11. Educational institutions. This is a great opportunity to meet men, even if you are already out of college age. Almost every institute has older students, not to mention faculty and staff.
12. Evenings. The party is unlikely to be both lively and relatively calm, but this is the best way to meet men. Avoid loud music and limit yourself to alcohol, and you can get off to a good start.
13. Interest clubs. Use your hobby to meet men. Whether you collect stamps, coins, books, or records, you can meet men who share your interests.
14. Evening classes and courses. A great opportunity to meet men. Study in a group, rather than individually, if possible. Choose topics that are interesting to you and attractive to men.
15. Rowing sections. In such sections, there are much more men than women. If you love rowing, then you have a great opportunity to meet men.
16. Shopping. Go to shops that have a lot of men, including those that sell electronics, sporting goods, or tools. But don't go to the men's underwear department.
17. Charitable actions. You can meet kind and generous men by inviting them to participate in charity events with you. Make sure they run smoothly, or get involved with other funds.
18. Public events. Attend events such as an oath ceremony, a political discussion, or an open meeting on a controversial issue. Participate in them as actively as possible, ask questions.
19. Restaurants. Yes, you can meet men in restaurants. It doesn't have to be very expensive: there is no need to visit the most luxurious. Besides, you have to eat somewhere. Ask your neighbor which dish he would recommend to choose.
20. Country clubs. A very expensive opportunity to meet a rather limited number of men. Before joining such a club, calculate the cost of a possible acquaintance. But if you are already using the club for some other purpose, then use it to meet men.
Act on your own
Many women meet men in the company of friends. This strategy is often flawed because a man usually does not suit a woman if she is not alone.
You may prefer to take a girlfriend with you, but this decreases your chances of meeting a man. Perhaps he is too shy to decide to approach two women at once, even if he is very interested in getting to know you. A man is more likely to approach an ordinary woman, if she is alone, than to an attractive, but with a friend.
If you are with a friend, but the man nevertheless approached you, there is an additional danger: he may be interested in his friend, and not in you. If you are already going to a company with another woman, start acting separately as soon as you come. Office romances
We've already said that work is one of the twenty best places to meet men. However, men are usually not attracted to the women with whom they work. They tend to find female employees, coworkers, and other women they meet at work as unsuitable for dating and getting married. Why are they missing out on such good opportunities to meet really attractive women? Let's look at personal and business reasons.
Fear of rejection
Because men are afraid of female rejection, they need to keep the fact of an invitation to a date a secret. A man must be sure that if a woman refuses him, it will not become known to everyone. If a woman gossips with her friends about a man whom she refused, then other men, hearing these conversations, hesitate to try to get closer to her, and she will lose potential applicants.
Often, men consider women, whom they meet in a work environment, to be truly inaccessible. They don't feel free to come up and invite her somewhere. This problem is especially compounded if the woman works in another department or for another firm.
Let's say he comes to a woman at her workplace and someone turns to him with the words: "What are you doing in someone else's department?" He will be embarrassed and will not answer anything, not because he is ashamed of this woman, but because he is afraid that her refusal would become a reason for gossip.
If a man avoids talking to you at work, he may try to call you at home. If he cannot find your phone number, or it is not in the directory, then you will never know about his interest in you.
It's even worse if you are in a leadership position. Many men would like to get to know you, and some might even marry, but how many of them manage to break through your secretary? Men are often awkward, trying to get close to a woman they like, they are easily scared off, and an experienced secretary will stop their calls. Or she will answer them herself.
The man will try to smooth out the possible failure as much as possible, using a business meeting as an excuse to see you. In this case, if you reject him, he will not take it as purely personal.
Let's say he called you with additional details of the contract that he wants to discuss with you. Don't you remember him, that co-worker you assigned to consult in the Legal Department? Or maybe he said he wanted your opinion on a new product, but you were too busy to schedule an appointment for him.
Be considerate of employees who come across you more often than the case really requires. Perhaps they are interested in you.
About the role of the collective
Teamwork makes it even more difficult to bond with women at work. Here are four problems a man faces.
1. An analogy with the prohibition of incest: meeting with an employee is the same as with a sister.
2. The firm prohibits nepotism.
3. Liability before the law for sexual harassment. A man fears that his aspirations may be contrary to the law.
4. The widespread belief that a man who finds time for cupids at work is distracted from his official duties.
So the team in the role of "big brother" becomes a patron that prevents people from getting closer.
What should a woman do? Can you find love at work? Don't expect men to be led by their desires. They are intimidated by women and afraid of public opinion.
Observe their maneuvers and tricks to spend time with the women they are interested in. You can meet a man at work or through work, but there are too many obstacles in front of a man that prevent him from taking the initiative in his own hands. You have to do it yourself and get to know him.
How to choose a suitable occupation
You usually don't need to change careers to meet new, better men, but it might be worth changing your place of work or your responsibilities where you work now.
Three traditionally female occupations contribute to marriage. Flight attendants, waitresses and nurses are successful with men because they represent friendliness, availability and concern for the comfort of a man. These efforts and attention are considered by men to be a sign that they are liked, therefore, women in these professions have access to men from all walks of life.
But it is not at all necessary to have one of these professions in order to find your chosen one and get married. Moreover, with a "non-traditional" profession, you can achieve much better results.
Here are ten jobs that you never thought could increase your chances of meeting the right man.
1. Consultant on deposits. You won't meet a lot of men in this profession. But the ones you meet will be successful ones. It will be easy for you to get to know them when they need your advice, as they will immediately reveal their goals and aspirations, as well as their financial situation.
2. A saleswoman in a men's shoe store. Usually men do not buy clothes from women, but shoes are an exception. Since every man has to buy his own shoes, you will be able to meet many men by selling them shoes. After meeting a man, ask him about shoes to start a conversation about his lifestyle.
3. Insurance agent. You will have access to any man, even if it is very difficult to get to know him. It is equally important that he will definitely pay attention to you when he meets. If you are shy and looking for a man who does not like big companies, then this is the activity for you.
4. Sale of cars. Most men enjoy buying a car. If you are a knowledgeable salesperson, then you will give them even more fun when they select and check the car. Your acquaintance will start on a positive note, as these men will share their inspiration with you.
5. Repair and maintenance of boats or yachts. If you love boats and yachts, why not meet a man who is also interested in this. If you know how to repair and maintain a ship, there will be a demand for you as a member of the crew.
6. Sale of medical equipment. You will have access to the medical community that the layperson lacks. You will get to know many doctors, technicians, and be able to impress them with your knowledge, instead of being in awe of them.
7. Modeling sportswear. You will meet many men, most of whom have excellent physical characteristics.
8. Political activity. You will meet many of the most interesting men. As you work on legislation on a wide range of issues, you will have free access to almost any of them.
9. Work in law enforcement agencies. You will have power and access to many men. You can stop and ask whoever you want.
10. Bank employee. If you control a person's funds, give him credit during financial difficulties, then he will feel gratitude and favor to you. Your job also gives you access to information about him that other women can only guess.
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This article will show you how to meet men. But, before you get acquainted with the most effective methods, I want to draw your attention to a win-win option - a targeted smile. Just smile, looking eye to eye, and the guy will definitely come up to you.
The most successful ways to meet men
Outside
The "search for a place" method ... Before you meet a guy, get close to him and ask how to get to the place you need. Better yet, ask him to show you the way. The main task is to show that you are confused. Believe me, a representative of the stronger sex, seeing that a weak woman is in front of him, experiences omnipotence in himself.
Be sure to talk to him along the way. For example, if the excuse for your search was a cafe, then tell them that your friend is late and you would not like to be alone. Offer him coffee with you. Well, then you will inform that a friend “wrote” that she cannot come. And you will be left alone.
In the cafe
« Broken phone » . We will tell you how to meet guys in this situation. Go to the young man and ask to set up the equipment (tablet, phone, etc.). For example, disconnect your internet connection first. Once you have been helped, express your gratitude, they really like it. Well, at the end, it would be nice to casually mention that you have a bad time without such a capable guy.
"Advice". Before you meet a normal man, ask the person sitting at the nearest table about his recommendations for choosing dishes. As soon as you are advised, immediately place an order, which would include only the recommended food, and express your gratitude for the advice as soon as you taste what was brought to you. If there is only one candidate, then there is a very high probability that he will join you.
In transport
"A magazine for men." Buy a magazine about auto or sports. As soon as you get on the transport, immediately unfold it in front of the young people so that they can see the cover. Periodically take your eyes off the magazine and look around. So you will see who will be interested in considering you. After a while, potential candidates will start asking you questions.
"Accident". If there are a lot of people in the transport, then you can pretend that you stumbled and fall right into the arms of a young man. Do not be silent, strike up a conversation with him. Complain that it is so difficult for you to move around with such a crowd of people, or tell me that it is difficult to keep your shoes from prying feet.
In a shop for men
"Fictional Purchase". Visit a boutique and start looking at any garment with passion. If one of the candidates turned out to be attractive to you, then ask him for help in choosing a gift for your relative. Let him try on the thing for himself. You can also say that you completely rely on his taste in choosing clothes. As soon as he puts on the thing, immediately compliment him on how it sits on him, and also sincerely thank for his attention and help. Next, ask to postpone the purchase. This way, you won't disappoint the person that you haven't bought the clothes they recommend.
In gym
"Fictional injury." Now you will learn how to meet men in a rather original way. So, while playing sports, pretend to be injured. Contact the guy you like with a request for help. Just do not overdo it, otherwise he will insist on calling an ambulance. Well, then you can ask him to give you a lift.
On the beach
"I can not swim".
Before you decide how to meet a guy, try the following. Get close to the candidate you are interested in, and tell them that you have not yet learned how to swim, but you really want to. He will definitely agree, because at such moments he begins to feel like a real hero. During the training, do not forget to repeat that you feel good and calm with him. 
"Prevention of sunburn". An original way to explain how to meet a man. It allows you to count on high responsiveness from young people. Call a guy you like, give him a sunscreen, and tell him you can't put it on his back. If you didn't manage to get to know each other right away, you can try again. During it, do not forget to mention how caring and skillful he is.
"Take to the team." Young people love to play outdoor games. Therefore, when you see a potential candidate, ask him to join his team. You will need to play in his favor.
Acquaintance without leaving home
"Acquaintance on the Internet." It is considered the most popular way. After all, he is an excellent solution for those who are thinking about how to get to know a guy without leaving home. But you shouldn't pin a lot of hopes on this acquaintance. The best way is to get to know each other live.
Unusual ways to meet
In the event that none of the above cases worked, then try the following.
"Classmate". Find a candidate you like and hug him with a ringing laugh. And then immediately ask for forgiveness for making a mistake. Point out that he is as attractive as the school friend you haven't seen in a long time.
"Business card". If you still have not figured out how to get to know the candidate you like, then you can hand him your business card. Do it with a smile, and also with the words that you will be glad to hear it. In this case, the stronger sex is of interest. But keep in mind that the initiator of the further relationship must still be a young man.
Don't assume that these are all-inclusive dating methods. Come to where you can practice all the other methods in practice.
So take action and never expect everything to be resolved by itself. It is much better to independently choose a young person you are interested in than to be in endless expectation that they will choose you.
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The secrets of seduction are based on the peculiarities of male psychology, and who else has an exhaustive idea about it, if not the men themselves. Therefore, in order to answer the question of where and how to meet a man, let us turn to the opinion of psychologists and simply experienced people.
You can get to know him anywhere. Above all, be around people more often. You can, of course, place an ad in a newspaper, use the services of the Internet or a marriage agency. But why not look around first: perhaps a suitable candidate will show up in your environment.
Do you work for a large company? Great, for sure you are not only doing business, but also take part in corporate parties where informal communication is encouraged.
Pay attention to your employees. Did you like any of them? Take your time to make rash decisions. Before getting to know yourself better, try to find out as much as possible about the subject of your interest, while being extremely delicate.
If what you learn about a man will further elevate him in your eyes, you can safely take decisive action.
Passing along the corridor or sitting at the table opposite, give him a charming smile, try to talk about nothing. But remember that excessive assertiveness is useless here. To get to know a man, be gentle and discreet.
All kinds of courses can become a fertile environment for making acquaintances, for example, learning to work on a computer, English, continuing education, etc.
Attracting the attention of a man you like in one of the classes will not be difficult and, moreover, will not arouse suspicion on his part. Just ask him to explain something, and perhaps your communication will not be limited only to educational material.
It will not be difficult to get a lover in a holiday home or on a tourist trip. Are you sure that the duration of holiday romances is directly proportional to the duration of the stay?
Not necessarily, because every rule has exceptions. How long the relationship with the man you like will last depends largely on your own behavior. Well, if the romance really turns out to be fleeting, there is a silver lining: a good dose of adrenaline and a boost of vigor from communicating with a young lover are still provided to you.
Undoubtedly, the easiest way to make friends is at receptions, birthdays, parties and other celebrations.
To meet a man, you shouldn't sit in a corner waiting for men to pay attention to you. Most likely you will not wait until the end of the evening. Take the initiative and try to get members of the opposite sex to notice you. Behave confidently and moderately.
If you are sitting next to or opposite the subject of your interest, ask him to serve you a dish or put a salad.
Having seized the moment, allow yourself to exchange a few words with him. When the music starts, invite the young man to dance, and during the dance try to induce his favor. Perhaps when the slow music starts playing again, he will come up to you.
If this does not happen, you can go for another trick: volunteer to help the hostess and ask the young man to bring something from the kitchen.
In the kitchen, you can linger a little and try to start a conversation again on some abstract topic. Well, what else can be done, I hope, your own imagination and developing circumstances will tell you.
You can meet a man in a park, in a store, just walking down the street, but wherever this happens, always remember that if you are really interested in a man, you should forget about complexes and fears, be spontaneous, funny and witty, in a word, to radiate joy and good nature.
Agree, a person who behaves naturally and at ease is more likely to attract attention to himself and arouse the disposition of anyone.
"And what to do, - you ask, - if a man refuses to meet?" Well, of course, do not reproach yourself and do not panic. If a man refused you, this does not mean that you look so bad that you did not find a response in his heart, that your years are to blame, you are just an old woman for him and it is high time to forget about love ...
Stop, such reasoning will not lead to good. Do not cheat yourself, first judge sensibly: what if your appearance and your age have nothing to do with it? Perhaps there are objective circumstances due to which a young man avoids new contacts with representatives of the opposite sex.
Women's pickup: meeting a man
You've probably heard a word like "Pickup". This is when women are looking for different ways to meet a man. In general, a pickup is more of a man's occupation. It is so customary that a man should be the first to meet. But we live in the 21st century and therefore the women's pickup truck is also popular now.
If you are a single and confident woman then this pickup truck is for you. It has several advantages. You will probably think that it is uncivilized and ugly to be the first to meet a man, but cast aside stereotypes.
Don't be afraid to sound arrogant and insecure. The main thing is to take the first step, and then, if a man is interested in you, he will support and continue to get to know you himself. Before you get to know a man, tidy yourself up and try to always smile. This will undoubtedly help you when you meet.
There are several positive aspects of a women's pickup truck:
He has absolutely no idea who you really are, so you can show yourself to him from different sides. Even if it doesn't apply to you
The second advantage is that you take the first step yourself and do not expect any calls. You liked the man - everything is in your hands.
Thus, you will not suffer from a lack of men around you. Many men respect courageous girls, and a pickup for them does not seem strange. You may not find love right away, but you will definitely have more friends.
The experience you get from a pickup truck is simply indescribable. You will feel brave and mischievous, perhaps step over some principles and stereotypes.
If, approaching a man to meet him, he refuses you, then you should not be upset. Take this as cowardice on the part of the man. This rarely happens, since men are flattered by the fact that they wanted to meet him.
You can get to know a man using a pickup truck everywhere: at the entrance of your house, on the way to the subway, in a subway car, on an escalator, in cafes and shops. In general, wherever you go. If you are attracted to a man, then first, take a quick look at him. He will look at you too. If his gaze rested on you, then smile at him. If a guy is smart, then he himself will come up to meet you. If not, then take the initiative. Above all, don't be too clingy.
In addition to the pickup, you can also meet at work. Everything is much simpler there. Perhaps you have some common acquaintances and you can organize a "casual" meeting. If you have already noticed a handsome man from a nearby office for a long time, try asking him for something, for example, to pump up a wheel in a car.
Take the first step and throw all the outdated rules aside.
I want to meet a man for a relationship
If you want to hook a person from the very first minute of communication, just understand which sense organ is dominant for him and influence it. Visuals, for example, have a bold, clear look.
In conversation, they always look at the interlocutor, try not to get too close to anyone, keep their distance, because they want to have a greater view. They often use words and expressions like: “I see”, “mind you”, “describe the situation to me”, “looks good”, “I see it differently”.
Of course, such men need to be seduced by their spectacular appearance and appropriate vocabulary. Adapt to his style of conversation, and you will immediately notice how easy it is to win over this person.
For example, you can approach him with the words: "I see you miss ..." or "Hello. From the outside you look like a very considerate person. I wonder if you noticed that I can't take my eyes off you? "
The whole world perceives audi by ear. Their speech is usually very diverse and full of different shades, halftones and intonations. During a conversation, they can gesture abundantly. Sometimes they do not look the interlocutor in the eye. They may even have a darting glance. And they often say something like: "You are not listening to me!", "Listen to what I tell you!"
You can conquer such a person when you meet him by adjusting to his system of perception. To do this, try to accurately copy the person's intonation and manner of speaking. Use the same words as him, adopt vocabulary, tone and timbre of voice. If the person speaks softly and modestly, try to respond in the same way. If he is loud, speak clearly and loudly.
Kinesthetics are most focused on touch. To know and love something, they need to feel it. Unlike all other people, they love touch and closeness.
They often use words like: “I don’t feel your love”, “I feel that you like me”, “I have a feeling that something is wrong”. Such men need to be conquered by touch. Do not act as a shy person, let him touch you. If such a man feels that his touch is pleasant to you, consider his heart in your pocket!
How to behave when meeting a man
Firstly, every man has his own set of sexual stimuli - those details of appearance, behavior, image of a woman that will arouse his sexual interest. All this is at a reflex level and almost from childhood. Therefore, every woman has a chance, and if a man appreciated it, you can be sure: he is yours.
Secondly, all women are victims of the media, who told them that men are interested in hairstyles, cosmetics and plush skirts. This is bullshit. If you want to meet a man, then forget about it. What man will notice a woman's new hairstyle if she doesn't ask him herself? And the skirt?
Only if he is afraid that she is spending too much ... A man is attracted by behavior - movement, posture, gestures, glance. If a woman exudes desire, a man cannot resist.
Thirdly, if you want to be attractive to your man, just take a closer look at what he pays attention to, what causes a spontaneous, lively, sexual response in him. Stop at this, and just forget about the rest.
You can be sexually attractive at any age because a man doesn't think about age. Everything is much simpler: he is either excited or not. And you need to select an individual key. "
It's hard to disagree, but how do you find this key? First of all, remember that a man is a hunter by nature, he is attracted by everything incomprehensible, mysterious, intriguing. He falls into the trap of a riddle. What are the tricks of this trap? First of all, this is the magic of facial expressions and body movements, as well as the ability to present oneself in a favorable light.
Communication between a man and a woman does not always involve words. Sometimes gestures, glances, movements and touching are much more effective and eloquent. One notorious ad said: "Sometimes it is better to chew than talk."
And it is true. After all, words can not only attract a stranger to us, but also push him away. And therefore, when meeting, do not rush to switch to verbal communication. Sometimes body language binds strangers faster and stronger.
Of course, most girls are brought up in such a way that they are not used to letting unfamiliar men too close. After all, everyone knows that a real lady will never let someone touch her whom she barely had time to get to know. But touch is different.
How to start a conversation with a man for dating
At times, the beginning of a constructive conversation can be a good question. To start a conversation with a man, find a topic that will completely hook the man you are attracted to. The classic dating method, when one person comes up to another and says: "Can I meet you?", Has one significant drawback!
Quite a few men are sullenly silent, but this does not make them less attractive.
It's just that some people find it difficult to maintain a conversation. And if you want the acquaintance to go like clockwork, try to masterfully direct the conversation in the direction you need. And for this, learn to ask questions correctly.
Years of study at the Faculty of Journalism were not in vain for me. I learned to conduct a conversation as if my interlocutor was a star invited to a talk show. And this is a very important point! In communication, there should be a friendly ease so that a person feels like a guest of a talk show during the meeting, and not a prisoner during interrogation.
To successfully meet a man, try to ask detailed questions. That is, those that cannot be answered unequivocally "yes" or "no".
For example, instead of asking: “Do you like this exhibition?”, It is better to ask: “Which of the paintings do you like the most? Truth? Why this one? " Don't ask intimate or materialistic questions. If you want to find out the financial and marital status of the man you are meeting, act as subtly as possible so as not to frighten off.
How to make an acquaintance unusual
Remember the movie Amelie. The main character put on a whole performance to meet the man of her dreams. She intrigued him for ages, sending him clues and riddles. She made him look for her. And it worked perfectly.
Our daily life is desperate for a holiday. Men are not the only ones capable of romantic insane acts. Women can also awaken vivid emotions and experiences in the soul of a man they like.
Make your acquaintance with a man unusual. Let this event be remembered for a long time by both of you. For example, I once sent a Valentine's Day card to a complete stranger.
Pitfalls when meeting
Of course, honesty is great. But everything is good in moderation. Especially if you want to meet a man. The fact is that some details of your biography when meeting you should not be disclosed, so as not to frighten off the emerging boyfriend. Of course, lying is not good, stupid and pointless, and sometimes even harmful.
On the other hand, being too frank at too early stages of dating is also sometimes completely inappropriate.
Some things should be kept quiet so as not to spoil the impression of yourself and not to expose yourself in a stupid light. Holy simplicity is inappropriate in this case. What phrases are included in the list of taboo when meeting?
What is better to keep silent during the acquaintance
“We had a fight with my husband, so I decided to have a good time!” These words can be misinterpreted. If you are planning a serious relationship with a new acquaintance, then he will understand that you are not free, and, most likely, will not show much activity in courting you.
If you just want to flirt with another man and with these words warn him in advance that he does not expect anything serious, then you may again be misunderstood. A man may decide that you are asking for one night of love, and will act accordingly, while showing considerable enthusiasm. After all, after having sex with you, he will not have any obligations!
"I haven't had sex for three years, five months and four days!" Again, this is too frank and unambiguous confession if you want to meet a man. Even if you are joking, there is a high probability that they will understand you literally and try to actively remove the stagnation in your intimate life.
A reverse reaction is also possible: then your fan will grow cold towards you, deciding that it does not hurt, then you are attractive, once in three years no one wanted you. Or maybe too capricious and picky? Or, on the contrary, a pervert nymphomaniac? Or frigid? None of these versions will add attractiveness and desirability to you!
“I never really get to know each other, but I liked you so much, I liked you so much! You are so handsome! I've just never seen such handsome guys! I'm just crazy about you! " etc. Compliments are great. Gross flattery is disgusting. If a man senses falsity in your words, it will only repulse him, if he feels that you are really choking with delight, he will become bored of your availability.
"My friends and I argued whether it was weak for me to approach you?" No comments. Men do not like to be the subject of controversy or experimental mice.
“I had 125 lovers, and in bed I'm just a hurricane. You will see!" Maybe he will, of course, someday see it, but saying this to a barely familiar person is not the smartest move. And in general, bragging is unlikely to attract young people.
"I have three children, my husband left me, and I'm looking for a new one." All this, of course, is very touching. But it is not worthwhile to announce your serious intentions to a man right off the bat. Let him and yourself enjoy flirting, romance, eroticism, gradual recognition. And only then decide whether you need each other? Are you compatible at home? Too hasty rapprochement will rob you of many of the joys of love!
What to do if, instead of meeting a man, there is a quarrel
Conflicting with strangers is always frustrating. It is difficult to agree, you do not know how to approach a completely stranger to you. And if this same stranger is also a man, and even you liked it ... It is customary to start new acquaintances with positive emotions.
To compliment a person, ask him for advice, charm with an impressive neckline, cheer with a fresh anecdote - and now invisible threads of mutual sympathy have already stretched between you, which means that the acquaintance went like clockwork. But what if you met under a not-so-pleasant set of circumstances?
Surely this happened to each of us. Have you ever accidentally dumped a glass of red wine on a man you like, or rammed his Lexus with your Nine, or somehow involuntarily spoiled a potential boyfriend?
How can the situation be rectified? What to do to change the prevailing negative impression of yourself and correct your acquaintance with a man?
Do not grovel or humiliate yourself, no matter how huge and blatant your guilt before a stranger may be. The role of "trembling creature" will not help to evoke sympathy, except perhaps contempt.
A whimpering girl begging for mercy is not the most tidbit for an irritated man. And hysterical pleas for forgiveness can only make him more angry.
Please sincerely apologize. Calmly and clearly offer to compensate for the damage.
If the damage you've done isn't too bad and the victim of your wrongdoing isn't too angry, you shouldn't apologize a thousand times. If the man only jokes in response to your apology, answer in the same humorous tone, gradually adding a touch of flirting to your voice.
If you were naughty to a man and only then noticed WHAT man you were naughty, do not hesitate to admit your mistake in a joking tone. Say something naughty and flirty. For example: “Sorry, this is always the case! The cutest come across under the hot hand! And where were my eyes a few minutes ago ?! "
Most importantly, if, despite the upcoming conflict, your smile melted the man like an iceberg, then your chances of a successful acquaintance and continuation of the relationship are great! Moreover: you have come across a very good-natured and easy-going person, and for such people you don't mind half a kingdom! And in the end, an acquaintance awaits you instead of a quarrel ...
Moms from an early age told us that decent girls should be modest, not talk to strangers on the street, but sit quietly and wait for their prince. But the years go by, and the prince is still gone and gone.
Today there are a bunch of dating sites where you can fill out a questionnaire and set the status "I will meet a man in Moscow." If you intend to seek your destiny on the Internet, keep in mind that this business is not at all quick and not very easy. But, however, in ordinary reality, the second half is not immediately found. It remains for you to make a choice: to hope for a miracle or to go in search of your own happiness.
Remember that members of the opposite sex are everywhere. You can meet a man on public transport, on the street, in a restaurant, in a club, at work, on the beach, and even at a doctor. You never know where you will meet your destiny. It is important to be ready for this meeting and not to miss your chance.
Every day a large number of young people pass by us.easiest?
There are places in Moscow where men come looking for girls for relationships without any commitment. If you get to know them in this place, then it will already be difficult for you to change the format of communication and move on to a serious relationship. There are places where men come to rest only with a male company. Usually in such places they are not in the mood for dating girls. You need to realize that not everyone is equally disposed to communicate in any place. One is comfortable talking in a cafe over a cup of coffee, while the other is comfortable on the dance floor. Choosing the right place where you can meet a man is already one step to success.
If you decide that you need an avid party-goer, then you need to go in search of him to a nightclub. Choosing a club in which your acquaintance should take place, think about: do you correspond to the level of this institution or not? Lovers of male workaholics should visit restaurants near business centers. Such men have no time to waste time preparing food, so they do not have lunch or dinner at home. If you decide that your man is a man of art, then go to meet him at the theater or art gallery. Looking for a book lover - go to bookstores, a football player - go to a match, a musician - go to a concert, a banker - go to the bank, a doctor - go to the hospital. You can make acquaintances with young people everywhere. But in order for your meeting to be pleasant for both of you, you need to decide who you are looking for and for what exactly.
Dating at the CityDate party
If you choose this particular place for acquaintance, then you will have several advantages:
1. The romantic atmosphere of the restaurant, where the meeting takes place, contributes to rest and relaxation after a hard day.
2. At a separate table, you are given to each other with a young man for exactly 7 minutes.
3. After the specified time has elapsed, the participants move to the next table. In the sympathy card, you mark the impression of the person who was just in front of you.
4. In a situation where it is obvious that you want to get to know a man better, you can exchange your contacts immediately.
5. The age group of the participants is determined during the announcement of the event. This will guarantee you the average desired group age.
Now you know where to meet a man in Moscow. We wish you good luck in love and a pleasant acquaintance in the way that you choose yourself.
Are you attractive, well-read, have a good sense of humor and are still single? Do you know where to meet a man you want to marry? This article lists 7 places where a beautiful young lady can meet a guy who is worth her love.
Lying on the couch and once again watching a snotty melodrama, it is impossible to meet a handsome prince. And only after leaving your comfort zone, you yourself will become a woman about whom you want to make a film or write a book.
So, the first step you have to take is to leave your room. Choose where to go:
1. Cinema.
Most readers will think this is an absurd idea. After all, acquaintance presupposes a conversation. However, there are exceptions and loopholes in all the rules. It is not at all necessary to pester with personal questions a neighbor in the cinema, whose face you cannot see because of the darkness. To meet someone at the cinema, you should come early and on a weekday (so that there are tickets). Look at movie posters before the cashier, and then go up to the man who is waiting for his show and ask him to recommend a picture. Strike up an unobtrusive conversation and buy a ticket to the same movie. If a guy is interested in dating, then after watching, he will ask if you liked the tape. The best way to discuss a movie is over a cup of coffee.
2. Take a look at the training.
The big city offers significant opportunities. A dozen trainings are held every day in the business center aimed at improving the qualifications of ordinary citizens. Most of the activities are free. The invitation can be obtained through the social network. Dress something pretty and discreet, get ready for the meeting and take action. Of course, choose the right event with a business, economic, legal theme. One more piece of advice, do not go to trainings where even the name is not clear to you. As a rule, such meetings are divided into two parts. During recess, the participants relax over coffee and tea. This is a great opportunity not only to get to know a focused person, but also to deepen your knowledge.
3. Bar.
Many experts have long thrown bars and cafes from the list of places where you can meet a good man. But in reality, it is this type of evening establishment that often helps to arrange a personal life. Of course, we should discard the cheap and vulgar bars serving warm beer, the tables are covered with oilcloth. Look for places that are famous for their style. There are many bars where visitors do not go for alcoholic drinks, but for quality music and atmosphere. Many institutions invite young musicians, newly minted writers to their place, offer to watch amateur films and discuss the picture with directors. Such places are the center of culture and taste. Here you can meet a good person who is not alien to art. Start a conversation with someone, make an appointment and plan your wedding.
4. Gym.
If you think that in evil you can only train and maintain your figure, then you are mistaken. Normal, modern fitness clubs are bars, cafeterias, places to relax. Make eyes at a cute stranger during your workout, and then wait until he comes to your bar. Have a cocktail together. You already have something in common - a love of sports.
5. Lunch at a restaurant.
How often have you noticed a lonely, attractive stranger at the opposite table during your lunch break? It's very easy to meet in restaurants and cafes in the middle of the day! This method has many advantages! First and foremost: you can immediately see which man is not married. The guys wear rings to work, and the cafes are usually visited by those who are far from home and who do not have a wife who would cook dinner that can be eaten in the office. Sit down at a table with a stranger and tell him that there is a promotion in the restaurant today, two portions for the price of one. And since there are two of you, it would be wise to have a hearty meal and save some money. Plus - talking over food. The gentleman will not refuse, and then he will also pay for you.
6. Excursions.
Every city has something to show the tourist. But it often happens that the inhabitants of the metropolis themselves do not know anything about their native land. Buy a tour ticket and join the tour group. There may be someone nice among the participants. Get close to the stranger and reveal a (prepared in advance) little-known fact about the city. And when he looks at you in surprise, admit that you are local and just wanted to fall in love with your native land again. Offer to show something more interesting, unknown to the guides at the end of the tour. There are many landscapes and secrets that only the locals know about. All the cards are up your sleeve.
7. Mass celebrations.
What could be better than a holiday for the whole city? On such a day, even the most inveterate hard workers quit their jobs and have fun! What are the advantages of such an event for a single woman? You can get acquainted with several men at once. On this day, no one will blame you for smiling at a stranger. However, it is necessary to choose not those who have already "plucked up", but those who, despite the festivities, have a decent look. An experienced woman at a glance can recognize a married man or single, earn good money or sit on the neck of her parents. The easiest way is to get acquainted with the goods in front of the shops. Buying something, strike up an innocent conversation: “It's good that such events are being arranged”, “I'm so glad that I finally got away from work” or “You don't look like a person who goes to mass festivities.” The last phrase in this case acts one hundred percent and prompts the answer.
Getting to know a nice person is not difficult. The main thing is the ability to interest and bewitch! Good luck charming women!