Addictions 

Features of the behavior of an anxious child. Characteristics of the behavior of anxious children

Anxiety is an individual psychological feature, when a person is very worried about minor reasons, constantly expecting danger. It is also a negative emotion associated with personality traits, temperament or a weakened nervous system. In anxious kids, adaptation in the team is disrupted, which breaks their happy existence. Are the parents able to help the child on their own or do they need professional help? Let's figure it out.

Childhood anxiety is one of the problems of the modern world. It manifests itself as a fear of changing living conditions or situations. Anxiety is persistent, persistent anxiety that does not go away, such as fear of the dark with the onset of day. The child is shy, cannot adapt to an unfamiliar environment, is afraid of strangers, he is afraid of the new team. This state affects the development, psychological balance, health of the little person, he has great difficulties in communication.

Experts in child psychology believe that among kindergarteners and primary schoolchildren, male children are more likely to be anxious, and female children over the age of 12. After committing some kind of offense, girls are more worried about the relationship (what adults or girlfriends will think), and boys are worried about possible punishment.

An anxious child finds it difficult to adjust to unfamiliar surroundings

Causes and factors for the appearance of an increased level of anxiety

The reasons for the appearance of anxiety syndrome in preschoolers and younger schoolchildren can be:

  • violation of relationships, unfavorable conditions in the family, divorce of parents;
  • improper upbringing (high expectations, pressure on the child, humiliation of the personality, conflicting demands);
  • heredity or birth trauma, diseases suffered by the mother during pregnancy;
  • diseases or infections that occur in infancy.

Types and types of anxiety: situational, personal, separation

Experts identify two main types of anxiety:

  • situational - associated with some event that happened to the child, shocked him and left a negative imprint on the child's behavior. It lends itself to correction. Try to avoid such situations by talking, explaining to the baby why and how it happened;

    The first visit to kindergarten or school can also lead to the development of situational anxiety. Children, getting used to new living conditions, show irritability, emotional excitability, and are capricious. After a certain period of adaptation (from a month to six months), everything is usually normalized.

  • personal - often transmitted and adopted from parents, in particular, a nervous and anxious mother, but it can also be an inborn feature of the psyche and temperament. This applies to children - pessimists and melancholic.

There is also such a concept as separation anxiety - the fear of separation from relatives or a place to which the child is emotionally attached. Its first signs appear in most babies: the little one gets scared and cries if the mother simply disappeared from his field of vision. Usually, over time and with the correct behavior of the parents, this passes by two years. First, you need to accustom your child to short separations. Further, to help him to be able to play with toys on his own, to stay calmly and without tantrums with other adults.

Babies find it difficult to let their mother go

To prevent such anxiety from becoming lingering, you need:

  • if the baby burst into tears, sit down next to him, hug him, comfort him in a calm voice, calm him down, but not grab his arms;
  • distract when the child stops crying;
  • play hide-and-seek and "peek-a-boo" so that the child gets used to the short-term absence of the mother;
  • leaving to say goodbye to him, wave his hand, explain where mom went and when she will return.

Aggressive disposition, shyness, impulsive behavior and other signs of disorder: a portrait of an anxious child

It is impossible not to pay attention to the increased anxiety of children: this condition will not go away by itself, but will only worsen. The constant anxiety of the child and the fear of seemingly ordinary things is a signal that there are violations in his life.

Symptoms to watch out for:

  • low self-esteem, shyness, lack of confidence in themselves and their intellectual abilities (they think that they will not succeed, they are not beautiful and smart enough), an inferiority complex;
  • complete obedience or absolute uncontrollability, demonstrative rudeness, excessive resentment;
  • refusal to play something new, to do something unusual;
  • neuroses (biting nails, pulling out hair);
  • somatic (nervous) problems (dizziness, weakness, cramps in the throat, shortness of breath, heart palpitations);
  • isolation, lack of communication, secrecy, constant expectation of something bad, depressive behavior;
  • tearfulness, fearfulness and absent-mindedness;
  • trouble falling asleep and restless sleep.

If the situation is serious, you need to seek advice from a specialist who will talk with the baby and his parents, create a psychological portrait of the child, and conduct tests to determine the degree of anxiety.

Tests for observation and conversation to determine the level of anxiety

There are a sufficient number of tests (in the form of questionnaires or pictures) that will help identify an anxious child.

Questions for parents of preschoolers

Fear of separation from parents often occurs in kindergarten toddlers. It is accompanied by constantly repetitive, excessive:

  • frustration, sadness at parting;
  • anxiety about the loss, that the adult may feel bad;
  • fear that any event will lead him to a break with his family;
  • refusal to go to kindergarten;
  • fear of being alone;
  • fear of falling asleep alone;
  • nightmares in which the child is separated from someone;
  • complaints of malaise (headache, abdominal pain).

Children with separation anxiety can get really sick when they think a lot about their concerns. If during a month of observations at least three of the listed fears have appeared, then anxiety has a place to be.

Diagnostics of anxiety in children of primary school age (grades 1-4)

  1. He cannot work for a long time without getting tired.
  2. It is difficult for him to concentrate on something.
  3. Any assignment causes unnecessary anxiety.
  4. During the exercise, he is very tense, constrained.
  5. Confused more often than others.
  6. He often talks about stressful situations.
  7. As a rule, blushes in unfamiliar surroundings.
  8. Complains that he has terrible dreams.
  9. His hands are usually cold and damp.
  10. He often has a stool disorder.
  11. Sweats a lot when worried.
  12. Doesn't have a good appetite.
  13. He sleeps restlessly, falls asleep with difficulty.
  14. Shy, many things make him afraid.
  15. Usually restless, easily upset.
  16. Often he cannot hold back tears.
  17. Poorly tolerates waiting.
  18. Doesn't like to take on a new business.
  19. Uncertain of himself and his strength.
  20. Afraid to face difficulties.

The number of affirmative answers shows the degree of anxiety in the child. High - 15 and more, average 7-14, low 1-6.

Scale of explicit anxiety CMAS schoolchildren up to adolescence

This is a kid-friendly option. Guys should characterize each sentence as right or wrong right away, without thinking for a long time. You cannot answer the same question twice.

The test is carried out by psychologists with groups of children; for younger students, an individual conversation is preferable, if the baby does not read well, the survey is conducted orally.

CMAS (The Children’s Form of Manifest Anxiety Scale) is a test to identify the degree of anxiety in schoolchildren of 8-12 years old.

Questionnaire to identify fears and anxiety-phobic disorders

  1. It's hard for you to think about one thing.
  2. It makes you uncomfortable if someone is watching you when you do something.
  3. You really want to be the best in everything.
  4. You blush easily.
  5. Everyone you know you like.
  6. Often you notice that your heart is beating hard.
  7. You are very shy.
  8. It happens that you want to be as far away from here as possible.
  9. It seems to you that others are doing better than you.
  10. In games, you love winning more than losing.
  11. Deep down, you are afraid of many things.
  12. You often feel that others are unhappy with you.
  13. You're afraid to be alone at home.
  14. It is difficult for you to decide on anything.
  15. You get nervous if you can't do what you want to do.
  16. Often you are tormented by something, and what you cannot understand.
  17. You are with everyone and always behave politely.
  18. You are worried about what your parents will tell you.
  19. It's easy to piss you off.
  20. You often find it difficult to breathe.
  21. You always behave yourself.
  22. Your hands are sweating.
  23. You need to go to the toilet more often than other children.
  24. Other guys are luckier than you.
  25. It is important for you what others think of you.
  26. You often find it difficult to swallow.
  27. Often you worry about something that, as it turns out later, didn't matter.
  28. It's easy to offend you.
  29. You are constantly tormented by whether you are doing everything right, as it should.
  30. You never brag.
  31. You are afraid that something might happen to you.
  32. It's hard for you to sleep in the evening.
  33. You are very worried about the ratings.
  34. You are never late.
  35. You often feel insecure about yourself.
  36. You always tell only the truth.
  37. You feel that no one understands you.
  38. You are afraid that they will tell you: "You are doing everything badly."
  39. You are afraid of the dark.
  40. You find it difficult to concentrate on your studies.
  41. Sometimes you get angry.
  42. Your stomach often hurts.
  43. You get scared when you are alone in a dark room before going to bed.
  44. You often do things that you shouldn't do.
  45. You often get headaches.
  46. You are worried that something will happen to your parents.
  47. You sometimes don't keep your promises.
  48. You get tired often.
  49. You are often rude to your parents and other adults.
  50. You often have terrible dreams.
  51. You think the other guys are laughing at you.
  52. It happens that you lie.
  53. You are afraid that something bad will happen to you.

Method for calculating results

After filling out the form, the result is studied by professional psychologists.

  1. The data are calculated on the subscale of social desirability (the tendency to present oneself in a predominantly favorable light):
    • the answer is “true” to questions 5, 17, 21, 30, 34, 36;
    • “Wrong” - 10, 41, 47, 49, 52.

      The total number of answers should not exceed 9. This or a higher result indicates that the child answered inaccurately, his remarks can be distorted under the influence of the desire to hide his shortcomings, to please, to guess the correct option.

  2. Answers are considered "true" on the subscale of anxiety (manifestation of fear in different situations) to items: 1, 2, 3, 4, 6, 7, 8, 9, 11, 12,13, 14, 15, 16, 18, 19, 20, 22, 23, 24, 25, 26, 27, 28, 29, 31, 32, 33, 35, 37, 38, 39, 40, 42, 43, 44, 45, 46, 48, 50, 51, 53.

The amount received is a preliminary analysis. Further, the data is processed by specialists.

Initial stage.

  1. Sheets are looked through and selected, in which the answers are the same (all "true" or "false"), this is a dubious result.
  2. Errors are studied: double options, omissions, strikethroughs, reasoning. No more than three oversights are allowed. If there are five or more of them, it means that it is difficult for the child to make a choice or he avoids answering, which is interpreted as latent anxiety.

The main stage.

  1. Data are read on subscales of social desirability and anxiety.
  2. Grades are converted to a ten-point scale. To do this, the results of each child are compared with the standard indicators of a group of children of the corresponding age and gender.
  3. Based on the information received, a conclusion is made about the level of the subject's general anxiety.

Anxiety level in boys and girls on a ten-point scale - table

Age and gender groups (results in points)
7 years 8-9 years old 10-11 years old 12 years
girls the boys girls the boys girls the boys girls the boys
1 0–2 0–3 0 0–1 0–3 0–2 0–6 0–5
2 3–4 4–6 1–3 2–4 4–7 3–6 7–9 6–8
3 5–7 7–9 4–7 5–7 8–10 7–9 10–13 9–11
4 8–10 10–12 8–11 8–11 11–14 10–13 14–16 12–14
5 11–14 13–15 12–15 12–14 15–18 14–16 17–20 15–17
6 15–18 16–18 16–19 15–17 19–21 17–20 21–23 18–20
7 19–21 19–21 20–22 18–20 22–25 21–23 24–27 21–22
8 22–25 22–24 23–26 21–23 26–28 24–27 28–30 23–25
9 26–29 24–26 27–30 24–26 29–32 28–30 31–33 26–28
10 29 and more 27 and more 31 and more 27 and more 33 and more 31 and more 34 and more 29 and more

Characteristics of all levels of children's anxiety from high to low - table

Preliminary evaluation of results Characteristic Note
1–2 Anxiety is not characteristic of the subject. Such excessive calmness may or may not be protective.
3–6 Normal level of anxiety The usual degree of anxiety required for adaptation and vigorous activity
7–8 Somewhat increased anxiety A slightly overstated level, often associated with a certain area of ​​life
9 Obviously overestimated anxiety Usually generalized
10 Very high anxiety Risk group

Study of the child's condition according to the Kudrin anxiety scale

The student evaluates the proposed statements by putting:

  • "++" if the described circumstances are very unpleasant for him (3 points);
  • "+" - a little unpleasant (2 points);
  • "0" - do not cause excitement at all (0 points).

This method shows the child's attitude to himself, situations related to learning, communication with teachers and peers.

  1. You answer at the blackboard in the lesson.
  2. Your mom or dad scolds you.
  3. You meet the guys from school.
  4. You will go, and guests to strangers.
  5. You are left at home alone.
  6. You come up, talk to the teacher.
  7. You cannot cope with the assignment in the lesson.
  8. Comparing yourself to other guys.
  9. Thinking about your business.
  10. They look at you as if you were little.
  11. You cry often.
  12. The teacher unexpectedly asks you a question in the lesson.
  13. Nobody pays attention to you in the lesson when you have done the job well, beautifully.
  14. They disagree with you, argue with you.
  15. You meet with the older guys in the courtyard at the entrance.
  16. They don't pay attention to you when you do something, play.
  17. You have terrible dreams.
  18. The teacher gives a difficult task.
  19. You choose the main roles in the game.
  20. Evaluate your work at home or the guys.
  21. You don't understand the teacher's explanation.
  22. The guys laugh when you answer in the lesson.
  23. You watch horror on TV, they tell you "scary" stories.
  24. Think about what will happen when you grow up.
  25. Adults (mom, dad, teacher) are angry with you (it is not clear why).
  26. The teacher evaluates your work that you did in the lesson.
  27. They look at you (watch you) when you do something.
  28. Something is not working out for you.
  29. The guys do not play with you (they never take the game), they are not friends with you.
  30. The teacher makes a remark in the lesson.

The results are calculated both for each individual type of anxiety, and in general:

  • 20 points or more in each section (or 60 in total) - high level;
  • 10-15 (up to 20) - the norm;
  • 5 on average is a high point of calm.

The last situation suggests that the child does not adequately assess reality, does not allow negative experience into consciousness. This interferes with the normal formation of the personality.

Elaboration of questions - table

Type of anxiety Test questions
educational 1 6 7 12 13 18 21 22 26 30
self-rated 5 8 9 11 17 19 20 23 24 28
interpersonal 2 3 4 10 14 15 16 25 27 29

Pedagogical methods and programs for the correction of anxiety syndrome

Correction of anxiety in children is not an easy and slow business, but a painstaking daily work.

You need to communicate with children tactfully and confidentially.

Communicate with babies prone to anxiety, you need to sincerely, affectionately call by name, and publicly approve. It is better to deal with them constructively in three directions:

  • help build self-confidence;
  • teach the ability to control your own state in different situations;
  • show how you can calm down and relieve muscle tension.

When working with an anxious child, you cannot:

  • question the authority of other adults (teachers, educators);
  • make increased demands that he will not be able to fulfill;
  • draw parallels with other, more successful students.

It is very important for every baby to feel protected, trust family members and be sure that they love him.

Game therapy as a method of psychotherapeutic influence

With the help of game therapy, observing a child, you can sort out his worries and overcome them. Children love and want to play, they are liberated and interested. For anxious guys, you need to avoid the competitive aspects (who is faster).

Experienced professionals know many group and individual games to relax, increase self-esteem, and reduce anxiety.

  1. The breathing game "Ship and Wind" will help to cheer up a tired baby. Let him imagine that a sailboat sailing on the sea suddenly stopped. To help him move on, you need to blow hard: inhale air, and then exhale noisily through your mouth. The result is a wind that will whip up the boat. The exercise is repeated several times.
  2. Playing "Bunnies and Elephants" raises self-esteem. At first you will be a cowardly bunny. What does a hare do when he is scared? That's right, it is trembling, show me how. What will a bunny do when it sees a wolf? That's right, quickly run away, show it. Now imagine that you are a big, strong, brave elephant. Show how measuredly, without haste and without fear, he walks. What does an elephant do if it sees a person? Nothing, he is not afraid, but calmly moves on, because people are his friends, show me how. Show me what an elephant does if it sees a tiger? He does not freeze with fear and calmly continues on his way.

Breathing exercises will relax your muscles

Fairy tales to help: features of fairy tale therapy

Fairytale therapy is an excellent means of gently influencing a child. Children are happy to listen to interesting stories, ask to read at night. They associate themselves with brave heroes, pity the weak. You just need to choose the right ones.

There are special psychotherapeutic tales for getting rid of fear, self-doubt, fear of independent actions. You can start a story and invite your child to finish it. For example, "Hard Times".

Hares lived in the forest: mom, dad and a hare. One day the daddy hare says to the mommy hare: “These are hard times. I thought for a long time how to survive, and came up with. Let us ... ”What do you think the papa hare said?

The continuation, invented by the little one, will help to understand how he feels in his family.

Art therapy to reduce anxiety and calm your baby

Art therapy is an important and effective direction for correcting children's problems. The classes do not require any special artistic skills. The child does as he can and feels, and his works express thoughts and state of mind.

There are many directions in art therapy:

  • isotherapy (depicting your fears on paper, drawing with your fingers, modeling from plasticine or clay);
  • phototherapy (using photographs or slides to overcome emotional difficulties);
  • sand therapy (ordinary sandbox games, drawing with grains of sand);
  • music therapy (listening to specially selected music or playing the sounds of musical instruments);
  • dance therapy (using dance or movement as a process of combining emotional and physical states).

In the classroom, children fantasize. The use of improvised means (clay, paints, threads, pasta, cereals, stones and sand) develops fine motor skills. Exercises with music and dancing, singing help to reduce stress, extinguish bad emotions, and defeat anxiety. During the process, a preschooler or elementary school student learns to communicate with peers, gradually begins to believe in himself, and gains interesting knowledge.

Play as a way of psychological correction of a child's behavior - gallery

Anxiety in children with disabilities (HH)

Specially trained psychologists should work with such children, who help not only their little patients, but also conduct trainings for their parents, since they live in a state of persistent anxiety and often despair.

In children with cerebral palsy (infantile cerebral palsy), a high level of anxiety is due to limited movement, frequent hospital stays, and worries about physical infirmity.

In children with mental retardation (mental retardation), anxiety increases at school, as it is difficult for them to correspond to ordinary peers. They may not be accepted by the team, it is difficult for such children to cope with the program and sit for the whole lesson. Parents' high expectations are also traumatic.

  • an individual approach to everyone (take into account the peculiarities of age, sex, disorders, mental development and condition);
  • inadmissibility of fatigue (often change tasks, alternate mental and practical work, submit material in small portions);
  • use methods that activate mental activity (developing speech, writing, reading skills);
  • timely and tactful help, encouragement for the smallest successes, the development of self-confidence.

The influence of parents on the occurrence of anxiety, divorce in the family

The family microclimate is an important factor in the normal life and development of a child. For a little person, relatives are his circle, in which he exists, learns to love or not love, rejoice, empathize.

The influence of mom and dad on a baby is enormous, it can be beneficial and, unfortunately, negative. Children become anxious if diktat reigns in the family, quarrels and conflicts occur, they begin to fear, withdraw into themselves, lie, play.

A child, of course, should grow up in a complete family, with mom and dad, sisters and brothers, grandparents, where everyone loves him and he loves everyone, and this is ideal. But, unfortunately, this is not the case for everyone. Parental divorce is a disaster for the baby, his emotional and mental state is under threat. Often he blames himself for this: he did not obey, he did not try enough. Moreover, worries are deposited in the subconscious and negatively affect future life. Mom and Dad should divorce as civilized and intelligent as possible, but if this does not work out, the little one should not hear swearing and insults.

Divorce of parents is a disaster for a child

Psychologists say that after a divorce, children's anxiety increases. You need to talk a lot with children, explain as honestly as possible why this happened.

If the baby stayed with one of the parents, the second one should come and spend time with him, and also talk, answer questions, and not just buy off gifts, because the baby loves both mom and dad. Everything possible must be done to minimize the mental trauma of the child, otherwise he will not grow up to be a happy person.

A boy who was not the Son of the Father in childhood, deprived of his positive influence, may not become the Father of the Son and pass on to him his adequate experience of sex-role behavior and protection from everyday dangers and fears.
In addition, parental divorce in older preschool children has a greater adverse effect on boys than on girls. The lack of influence of the father in the family or his absence can make it most difficult for boys to develop gender-appropriate communication skills with peers, cause self-doubt, a feeling of powerlessness and doom in the face of even an imaginary, but filling the consciousness of danger.

A. I. Zakharov

http://lib.komarovskiy.net/detskie-straxi-ot-5-do-7-let.html

Nobody wants their child to become anxious. But it so happens that even the most loving parents contribute to this if excessive demands are made on the baby, which he is not able to fulfill, they want to embody their unfulfilled dreams and aspirations in him. Over time, a son or daughter begins to understand that they do not meet the requirements, an inferiority complex develops.

Memo: wishes for parents in matters of education and communication

  1. Understand and agree with your child's concerns. Be interested in how he lives, what he thinks, what he is afraid of, talk about it, discuss current situations together, look for a way out, draw conclusions from the troubles that happened, because this is how experience is gained. A small person should be absolutely sure that with his worries he can always run to mom or dad. You need to sympathize, even if children's problems seem like sheer nonsense.
  2. Create conditions, help to overcome tightness (if your child is afraid to make a purchase in a store, make it with him, thereby setting a personal example).
  3. Prepare the baby for changes in life and important events in advance, explain what and how will happen.
  4. In difficult situations, do not do everything for your son or daughter, offer to think for yourself, sometimes it is enough that someone from your family is nearby.
  5. You cannot stimulate the child's legal capacity by describing the expected difficulties in an unfavorable way (for example, emphasizing what difficult dictation awaits him). Optimism is an anti-anxiety quality.
  6. Tell us about your experiences in the past tense (at first it was scary, but then everything worked out).
  7. In every unpleasant situation, find good moments (mistakes in the lesson - it happens, but you figured out what to pay attention to).
  8. Teach your offspring to set small, real-life tasks for yourself and carry them out, bring up responsibility in him.
  9. Show how to relax and calm down (breathing exercises, good thoughts, counting to ten).
  10. Hug, kiss, stroke the head more often - everyone needs tactile contact.
  11. Do not undermine the authority of other adults with whom the boy or girl interacts.
  12. Act consistently (do not suddenly prohibit what was previously allowed) and unanimously (if mom says no, then dad, grandmother and everyone else support her).
  13. Do not demand the impossible, once again help the little one.
  14. Praise any minor successes.
  15. Trust your child and be sincere with him.
  16. Choose a hobby group for him, where he will not feel worse than others.
  17. Punish and reprimand as little as possible. But if such measures are necessary, then do not humiliate.

Parents should try to follow the listed principles, give the baby some freedom, let him learn to make decisions on his own, but never leave him alone with difficulties for which he is not yet ready.

Become your child's best friend

Recommendations for educators (educators and teachers) in working with children

  1. The tasks for the student should be appropriate for his capabilities. Complicated and deliberately impracticable assignments are doomed to defeat, a decrease in self-esteem.
  2. A benevolent emotional background and confidence in the baby is the key to success (you will definitely succeed).
  3. Comparison with other children is not acceptable. You can only compare the achievements of the child himself (you did well, and tomorrow it will be even better).
  4. Public speaking or competition is not for the anxious little one.
  5. A detailed plan for completing the task will help the insecure kid to cope with the task at hand (first you do this, then that).
  6. Humiliation is unacceptable: you cannot shame such a child in front of other children.
  7. Calling by name increases self-confidence.

Pedagogical work, the work of psychologists and parents, agreement between them and the desire to help will not remain without positive consequences.

How to help an anxious child - video

A list of literature on the psychology of childhood anxiety, accompanied by parents who want to dig deeper into the topic

Many books, articles and scientific papers have been written about the problem of childhood anxiety and how to correct it.

  1. A.I. Zakharov "Prevention of deviations in the behavior of a child." The Russian Honored Psychologist in his book analyzes the causes of psychological disorders in the behavior of preschoolers, ways of correcting and preventing them with the help of games and drawing.
  2. A.M. Parishioners "Anxiety in children and adolescents: psychological nature and age dynamics." The author cites the results of a long-term study devoted to the study of anxiety from preschool to adolescence. The reasons for its appearance and the ways of expression in different years of the life of children are considered.
  3. P. Baker, M. Alvord "Criteria for determining anxiety in children." American psychologists have developed a child's anxiety scale based on his behavior.
  4. V.M. Astapov "Anxiety in Children". The distinguished scientist has dedicated a book to the examination and analysis of emotional disorders.
  5. L.M. Kostin "Play therapy with anxious children." The publication analyzes in detail the importance of game therapy in the process of correcting psychological disorders, describes ready-made educational programs.
  6. O.V. Khukhlaeva, O.E. Khukhlaev "Labyrinth of the Soul: Therapeutic Tales". The authors have compiled a collection of psychocorrectional and therapeutic fairy tales for preschoolers and primary school students.

Works of Astapov, Baker, Kostina, Alvord and other psychologists - photo gallery

Small children are defenseless, they need timely, qualified help, which must be provided tactfully and benevolently, with faith in success. Support for adults, timely counseling from experienced professionals, implementation of recommendations will help in the fight against anxiety.


Anxiety is a characteristic trait of the baby's personality, characterized by a predisposition to expressed excitement and anxiety in a variety of situations that do not dispose to this.

Concepts "Anxiety" and "anxiety" differ significantly. Anxiety refers to an occasional restlessness. Anxiety, on the contrary, refers to permanent states and is not associated with a specific situation. The condition when the baby is very afraid of certain things or events is called fear.

In children under 6 years of age, problematic relationships with parents are considered the most important causes of anxiety. During this period, boys are more anxious.
The level of anxiety of parents has a big imprint on the same condition in children. The use of an authoritarian style in upbringing, increased demands on the baby, as well as comparing him with those around him, significantly increases anxiety. Often, anxiety is a consequence of neuroses and other mental disorders.

The main causes of anxiety in babies are:

Lack of a sense of safety in babies;
Hostility and rejection of children by adults;
Parental anxiety;
Unfavorable family microclimate;
Poor material conditions of the family;
Inconsistency of the claims of adults with the real capabilities of the baby;
Inadequacy of parental requirements for the baby;
An increased level of anxiety in parents;
Parents do not follow the sequence in the upbringing of the baby;
Making demands on children that contradict each other;
Increased emotionality of parents;
Comparisons of the baby with others;
Authoritarian parenting method;
The desire of adults to comply with generally accepted norms.

Types of childhood anxiety:

1. Anxiety is a character trait(copying the actions of anxious adults, peculiarities of temperament);
2. Situational anxiety. It deals with individual situations.

Types of Anxious Babies:

Neurotics... In such babies, an increased level of anxiety leads to somatic disorders: stuttering, enuresis (bedwetting), tics;

Disinhibited kids. In such children, anxiety is expressed in the form of increased emotionality and activity;

Shy kids. They are afraid of almost everything;

Introverted kids. In this case, anxiety is expressed in alertness, lack of responsiveness and friendliness in the child.

Features of anxious children:

Intense look;
Quiet voice;
The baby's lack of confidence in himself;
The presence of somatic disorders of the body: painful sensations in the abdomen, headaches, spasms in the airways, thirst, decreased muscle tone in the legs;
Decreased self-esteem;
Painful reaction to criticism;
Self-blaming tendency;
Children with great difficulty make contact with others;
Kids often criticize others.

Signs of high anxiety in a baby:

1. Constant manifestation of anxiety;
2. It is very difficult for a kid to concentrate attention;
3. Increased muscle tone on the face and neck;
4. The kid is often annoyed;
5. The child has sleep disorders.

If you constantly notice at least one sign in your baby, then it is likely that he has a high degree of anxiety.

Determine the level of children's anxiety:

To identify this indicator in your baby, it is recommended to use a special test. In it, next to the sign of anxiety, you must put a + sign if it is typical for your child.

Signs of anxiety:

1. The kid gets tired quickly enough;
2. It is very difficult for a baby to focus his attention;
3. Completion of tasks causes great anxiety in the baby;
4. The child is very tense when performing tasks;
5. The child is more embarrassed than others;
6. The kid often mentions stressful situations that happened to him;
7. The child blushes in an unusual or new environment;
8. The baby has terrible dreams;
9. The limbs of the baby are usually cold and damp;
10. The baby often has a stool disorder;
11. The child is characterized by increased sweating when performing tasks or assignments;
12. The baby has a weak appetite;
13. The child's sleep is very restless, he often wakes up;
14. The child is shy;
15. It is very easy for a kid to get upset;
16. The baby often cries;
17. The kid is impatient and has great difficulty with waiting;
18. The child does not like to start a new business;
19. The child expresses self-doubt;
20. The kid is very afraid of difficulties.

Count the number of + signs:

0 - 6 - the child has very low anxiety;
7 - 14 - average degree of anxiety;
15 - 20 - high anxiety.

We help anxious children in the right way:

Improving self-esteem

It is important to refer to the baby by name;
Reward your baby for any achievements in the presence of strangers;
Explain the reasons for rewarding your baby.

Self-management skills

Discuss the reasons for the baby's anxious behavior together;
Do not compare the crumb with strangers;
Avoid events where competition is taking place;
Establish a close eye-to-eye relationship with your baby;
Compose stories together;
Play the situations that worry your child.

Decreased muscle tone

1. Use games where physical contact with the baby is established;
2. Apply relaxation exercises several times a day;
3. Teach your child to breathe deeply;
4. Do yoga with your baby;
5. Massage your baby;
6. Rub the baby's body gently.

Correct organization of the life of anxious children:

It is important to observe your child carefully so that you do not waste time to correct his problems. Don't leave baby crying unnoticed. On the contrary, show that you deeply understand and experience its difficulties.

Anxious babies feel safe only in the presence of their mother. Calmly, without stress, take the baby to your bed.
For such children, it is very important to adhere to the daily routine. They don't like swimming too much. Therefore, it is better to bathe them longer in a small baby bath. With such children, do not rush to learn swimming, dousing and other wellness procedures.
Anxious kids don't like dressing up. Therefore, buy clothes that are easy to put on and take off. Reduce the amount of clothing you wear over your head. If the temperature in the room permits, put on a minimum of clothes on the crumbs.
It is very difficult to feed anxious children. They do not like multi-component dishes, because they do not understand what they are made of.
Anxious children often refuse to work in a team, so it is necessary to create conditions for the child to spend some time with the children. The child should not be forcibly involved in group games.

At first it will be difficult to communicate with your anxious child, but if you start to react sensitively to his requests, then over time he will be able to please you with his attention, tenderness and developed thinking.

What should parents of anxious babies do ?:

O Do not make high demands on the child;
o Convince the baby of your boundless and sincere love;
o Communicate your baby's progress to all family members;
o Do not use words that degrade the dignity of the baby;
o Do not force the kid to apologize for misconduct, but ask him to explain their reason;
o Minimize the number of comments;
o Do not frighten the kid with impossible punishments;
o Communicate with your baby more;
o Use gentle touch;
o Parents must be unanimous and consistent in parenting;
o Parents of anxious toddlers are advised to perform a set of relaxation exercises;
o Find out the reasons for fears and increased anxiety in the child;
o Be interested in everything that happens in your baby's life;
o Minimize the number of anxious situations;
o Do not solve all life problems for the child;
o Always offer your child your help;
o Prepare your baby for a difficult situation in advance;
o Tell your child about your childhood fears and current problems;
o Compare the child's achievements;
o Do not skimp on affectionate words and body contact.

Good luck in raising happy kids!


Anxious children are characterized by frequent manifestations of anxiety and anxiety, as well as a large number of fears, and fears and anxiety arise in situations in which the child, it would seem, is not in danger. Anxious children are especially sensitive. So, the child may worry: while he is in the garden, suddenly something will happen to his mother.

Anxious children are often characterized by low self-esteem, in connection with which they have an expectation of trouble from others. This is typical for those children whose parents set them unbearable tasks, demanding that they are unable to fulfill them, and if they fail, they are usually punished and humiliated (“You cannot do anything! You cannot do anything! ").

Anxious children are very sensitive to their failures, react sharply to them, tend to give up activities, such as drawing, in which they have difficulty.

In such children, you can notice a noticeable difference in behavior in class and outside of class. Outside of class, these are lively, sociable and direct children, in class they are squeezed and tense. They answer the teacher's questions in a quiet and deaf voice, they may even start to stutter. Their speech can be either very fast, hasty, or slow, difficult. As a rule, prolonged excitement arises: the child fiddles with clothes, manipulates with something.

Anxious children are prone to bad habits of a neurotic nature (they bite their nails, suck their fingers, pull out their hair, masturbate). Manipulation with their own body reduces their emotional stress, calms them down.

Drawing helps to recognize anxious children. Their drawings are distinguished by an abundance of shading, strong pressure, as well as small sizes of images. Often these children get stuck on details, especially small ones.

Anxious children have a serious, restrained expression on their faces, lowered eyes, sits neatly on a chair, tries not to make unnecessary movements, not make noise, prefers not to attract the attention of others. Such children are called modest, shy. Parents of peers usually set them up as an example for their tomboys: “Look how well Sasha behaves. He doesn't indulge in a walk. He folds his toys neatly every day. He listens to his mother. " And, oddly enough, this whole list of virtues is true - these children behave "right".

But some parents care about the behavior of their children. “Sasha is not inquisitive at all. Likes to do only what he is used to. It is not possible in any way to interest him in something new. “Lyuba is very nervous. A little bit - into tears. And she does not want to play with the guys - she is afraid that they will break her toys. " "Alyosha constantly clings to his mother's skirt - you can't drag it away."

Thus, the behavior of anxious children is characterized by frequent manifestations of anxiety and anxiety, such children live in constant tension, all the time, feeling threatened, feeling that at any moment they may face setbacks.

Important place in modern psychology is gender studies disturbing behavior. It was noticed that the intensity of the experience of anxiety, the level of anxiety in boys and girls are different. In preschool and primary school age, boys are more anxious than girls. This is due to the situations with which they associate their anxiety, how they explain it, what they fear. And the older the children, the more noticeable this difference. Girls are more likely to associate their anxiety with other people. People with whom girls can associate their anxiety are not only friends, family, and teachers. Girls are afraid of so-called "dangerous people" - drunks, hooligans, etc.

Boys, on the other hand, are afraid of physical injury, accidents, and punishment that can be expected from parents or outside the family: teachers, school principals, etc.

The problem of anxiety is especially acute for adolescent children. Due to a number of age characteristics, adolescence is often referred to as the "age of anxiety." Teenagers worry about their appearance, about problems at school, relationships with parents, teachers, and peers. And the lack of understanding on the part of adults only intensifies the unpleasant sensations.

Correction of childhood anxiety using various methods of play therapy

Wellness program

This program is a set of games combined in two cycles and aimed at reducing the level of anxiety in children.

The first cycle includes games, the main purpose of which is to reduce the level of anxiety, develop the child's self-confidence and improve self-control skills.

The second cycle includes games, the main purpose of which is to help the child to become aware of his own feelings, experiences and to master new effective socially acceptable strategies of behavior.

Each lesson can include either one game, as presented in the program, or a combination of several games at the discretion of the psychologist. Classes require a separate room, preferably located away from the music and sports hall and from other sources of increased noise.

First cycle

Lesson 1. "Drawing game"

Lesson 2. "Tearing the Paper"

Lesson 3. "Play with a stopwatch"

Lesson 4. "Imagine that you can do it"

Lesson 5. "Playing with clay (dough, plasticine)"

Lesson 6. "Magic carpet"

Lesson 7. "Hidden Problems"

Second cycle

Lesson 8. "Feelings"

Lesson 9. "The world of feelings"

Lesson 11. "Writing stories with objects"

Lesson 12. "Construction"

Lesson 13. "Photo album"

First cycle

"Drawing game"

The first meeting with a psychologist, as a rule, causes anxiety in children or increases the existing feeling of anxiety. "Playing with pictures" allows you to reduce the level of anxiety in the child to increase the effectiveness of further work.

At the beginning of the game, the psychologist asks the child if he has ever played with drawings, and at the same time begins to draw and comment at the same time. With the words: "Let's draw a house", - he draws a square, and in it two smaller squares (windows) and a rectangle in the middle (door). “This is an ordinary house, with two windows, a roof and pipes” (triangle - roof, two rectangles - pipes).

“Sasha lived in a house with his parents. Once they bought him a puppy. " The psychologist addresses the child: "What did Sasha call the puppy?" The child may suggest some kind of nickname. If he does not, the psychologist himself suggests it. “Let's call him Rex. One day Sasha returned from kindergarten and did not find Rex's home. He went outside to look for the dog. " The psychologist draws a straight line down from the door.

Then he turns to the child: "Do you think Sasha found his dog there?" If the child answers “no” or is silent, the psychologist continues the story. If the child answers “yes”, the psychologist says: “Approaching the dog, Sasha saw that it only looked like Rex, but it was not Rex”. Then he continues the story: "Sasha began to look for Rex further." The psychologist draws several lines until something looks like four legs, and then he says: "Sasha remembered that Rex likes to walk in the park and went there." In this case, you need to draw a line slightly up, and then to the side, so that it looks like a tail. “Sasha walked through the park (the curl on the tail), but he never found Rex. And then he went home. " Here you can ask what mood Sasha was in, how quickly he walked home, what he did along the way. The psychologist then draws a horizontal line to the left and connects the park (tail) and the house (dog's head). As a result, you should get a drawing that looks like a dog. Then the psychologist asks: "What happened to our drawing?" If the child responds, the psychologist strikes up a conversation with him. If he is silent, then the psychologist himself must be told that the drawing has turned into a dog. Then you can invite the child to draw himself.

"Drawing game" allows the child to reduce the level of anxiety and makes it possible to establish a positive relationship between the child and the psychologist.

"Tearing paper"

This game helps to reduce stress, gives the child the opportunity to express emotions and reduce the state of anxiety in children.

For work, you must have old newspapers or any other unnecessary paper. At the beginning of the game, the psychologist may, without explaining the rules, simply invite the child to tear the paper. Then he takes the newspaper himself and begins to tear it up and toss the pieces into the center of the room, while telling the child that the size of the pieces is not important. If the child does not immediately connect to work, he should not be forced. The psychologist can stand with his back to the child, pretending not to notice him. As a rule, children get involved in the game. When the pile in the center of the room becomes large, the psychologist invites the child to play with the pieces and begins energetically tossing them up, scattering them around the room.

"Play with a stopwatch"

This game is conducted for the child to master the skills of self-control. As a result, the child will increase the motivation to control his reactions and he will be able to feel satisfaction from the result of the performed action.

To play the game, you will need a stopwatch, chips, drawing supplies, cubes. The child will have to complete one of two tasks: build a tower from cubes or paint a stenciled image.

Starting the game with a stopwatch, the psychologist says: “Now I will give you ten chips. Here are the cubes. You need to build a tower in 10 minutes. If you are distracted, you will not be in time. Moreover, every time you get distracted, start talking, ask me questions or do something else, you will give me one chip at a time. If you complete the task in 10 minutes, I will give you 10 more chips. When you have 30 chips, you win and you will receive a prize. "

The complication of the game is that after several sessions (when the child learns not to be distracted), the psychologist deliberately distracts the child while completing the task. In this case, the latter is instructed not to pay attention to the therapist. Subsequent possible complications of the game are associated with the lengthening of the task execution time by 5 minutes.

"Imagine that you can do it"

The exercise is used to build self-confidence in the child. The child is invited not only to do something, but to imagine that he can do it and show it. For example, if you ask your child to tie their shoelaces, they may refuse. In this exercise, the psychologist asks him to imagine that he can tie his shoelaces and show him how to do it.

In an imaginary play situation, the child feels more free and is not afraid that something will not work out for him. Moreover, in this case, the process of independent action itself is more valuable for the child than its result.

"Playing with clay (dough, plasticine)"

To play the game, you must have plastic material (clay, dough, plasticine), a set of molds (allowing you to reflect a variety of emotionally significant themes), a rolling pin, various graphic and ornamental objects (pebbles, feathers, toothpicks, pencils, stacks, a hammer, a plastic knife).

First, the child is given the opportunity to study the properties of the material provided to him, to play with it. In this case, the psychologist can also play with the material. As a rule, at first the child plays with the material and objects for some time, studying their properties and observing the therapist's reaction. Then he moves on to the main stage of work - the creation of certain images. Each child's work with the material is individual, so the psychologist needs to behave quite sensitively and carefully in order to choose the optimal moment in order to intervene in the process of children's creativity.

There are two main ways children can work with material:

1. Creation of single symbolic images.

2. Creation of a set of figures or images that are used for role play.

This game allows the child to reduce the level of anxiety, weaken and relieve emotional and physical stress.

"Magic carpet"

The game is aimed at relieving the child's tension, stiffness and reducing the level of anxiety.

To carry out the game, it is necessary to have a small, light rug that the child could easily move, but at the same time could fit on it while sitting and lying down.

The psychologist offers a rug to the child and says that it is not a simple rug, but a magic one, and at the moment it has turned into a house (hospital, kindergarten, crib, etc., depending on the child's problem). Then the psychologist offers to play on this rug and himself joins in the game, taking on the role of a mother (teacher or another person, depending on the child's problem).

"Hidden Problems"

Most anxious children tend to have anxious experiences in them. This game will allow your child to express their feelings, reduce anxiety levels and prepare for the second cycle.

To play the game, you will need an empty container with a lid (box, box), felt-tip pens, paper. The psychologist makes a hole in the lid so that a small sheet of paper can be inserted there. Then he invites the child to draw what or who is disturbing (scaring) him, to tell about it, and then to throw it into the “mailbox”, i.e. hide the problem. If the child does not have enough visual skills or he refuses to draw, you can invite him to talk about his problem, then blow on a blank piece of paper (“put” the problem into it) and “hide” it in the “mailbox”.

After class, you can ask your child what he wants to do with the contents of the box. If the child finds it difficult to answer, the psychologist needs to offer various options: throw away, tear, crumple, burn, etc.

Second cycle

"The senses"

The main goal of the game is to help the child in expressing feelings and learning to correlate emotional states with their pictorial images.

To conduct the game, the psychologist needs to prepare cubes with faces painted on them, depicting various feelings (joy, anger, sadness, fun, resentment, etc.).

At the first stage, the psychologist introduces the child to the images, naming the feelings. Then he asks the child to show him the cube and name what feeling is drawn on it. In this case, it is not at all necessary that the child name exactly the feeling that was originally assigned to the image.

At the next stage, the psychologist invites the child to build a tower or house from blocks. In this case, the child needs to take any cube, name the feeling that is depicted on it, and then use it to build.

The complication of the game lies in the fact that the child is asked not only to name the feeling that is depicted on the cube, but also to tell in what situation he experienced (is experiencing, could experience) this feeling.

"The world of feelings"

This game allows the child to feel the safe distance necessary to verbally describe their experiences. Involvement in play helps to remove psychological defenses and, in a conditional play context, makes it possible for the child to describe his experiences verbally. In addition, play allows the child to react to his feelings, which he is aware of, but cannot express in words.

During the game, the psychologist is at the child's level: either at the table or on the floor. He has 8 sheets of 10x15 cm paper, as well as a marker and a glass of chips. These can be bottle caps, circles cut from colored cardboard, or playing chips.

At the beginning of the game, the child is asked to list all the feelings he knows. At the same time, the psychologist, with the help of drawings on a sheet of paper, schematically conveys this feeling (for example, joy is a smile, sadness is a tear, etc.). The psychologist tries, first of all, to find out those feelings that are associated with the existing disorder in the child. If the verbal expression of feelings is difficult, the psychologist can suggest options to the child. After all 8 sheets are completed, the psychologist places them in front of the child. Then the psychologist tells a story, while he puts chips on those pictures that correspond to his feelings. The task can be somewhat complicated if, with the help of chips, the intensity and strength of the feeling is conveyed: the stronger the feeling, the more chips in one picture.

The child tells the following stories himself, and the psychologist puts chips on the corresponding pictures. If there are not enough images to convey feelings, they can be drawn additionally. This game is especially effective when working with anxious children: it allows you to understand the reasons that cause anxiety in a child.

Directional visualization

This game is based on the relaxation method. When using this game with children, you must first apply exercises aimed at achieving focused attention against a background of relaxation, and then evoke visual images in the child.

Using this method, the child gains control over his own body and feelings, but only if he is able to perform simple tasks in sequence and does not resist relaxation.

The child is invited to sit in a special, comfortable chair or on a crib. Then the child is asked to concentrate in turn on each muscle group (legs, arms, body, face), alternately straining and relaxing them. Ultimately, relaxation of all muscles is achieved. While deep muscle relaxation is helpful for guided visualization, in the early stages of work or when working with young children (who find it difficult to stay still), it is enough to ask the child to simply perform tasks related to focusing on different muscle groups. The child should be taught to achieve relaxation with open eyes. This will help him to further activate his imagination in an environment that is not conducive to immersion in deep relaxation.

"Writing stories with objects"

This game allows the child to define their feelings and realize the consequences of their actions in a given situation.

You will need five or six items to play the game. They put these objects in front of the child and explain that he needs to come up with a story about them, and the story should be interesting and should teach something. After that, the child chooses an object and comes up with a story about it. During the story, the psychologist can analyze with which hero the child identifies himself, what feelings and actions he attributes to him, how real they are. The psychologist then retells the child's story.

The main purpose of a child's essay and its retelling by a psychologist is to provide the child with the opportunity to understand his feelings and realize the consequences of his actions.

"Construction"

This game will help your child learn to verbally and non-verbally express their emotions.

The game requires cubes used as building materials. The psychologist explains to the child that together they will build a house (fence, tower, etc.). But before placing the cube, the child needs to be told what annoys him the most. Only then can he place his die. Then the psychologist does the same. Next time the child can tell what he likes the most, then what makes him happy, what makes him sad, what he is afraid of, etc. "Photo album"

This game allows the child to find out his feelings about certain events and people who are significant to him in a non-traumatic way, and also helps the child express his feelings.

To conduct the game, you need to ask the parents to pick up and bring family photos, which would clearly enough depict the child's close relatives and, if possible, life situations reflecting various aspects of the child's life. You will also need scissors, glue, felt-tip pens, paper, tape.

Brought photographs are laid out on the floor so that they can be clearly seen. The therapist then asks the child questions about the people in the photographs. After that, photographs are revealed that the child for some reason does not like. The psychologist asks the child what exactly he does not like about them, and asks him to do as he would like to: paint the photographs, cut out those people that he does not like, glue those that he likes, etc. If the child does not have sufficient technical skills, the psychologist can help him modify the photographs. Modified photos are added to a separate "photo album".

This game can be performed several times during the entire correction process to monitor whether the child's attitude towards close relatives changes. The converted photographs can also serve as sufficient informational material. With the permission of the child, this "photo album" can be shown to parents.

To relieve anxiety in younger students, there are whole complexes of techniques, exercises. However, two methods play a central role.

1. Sequential desensitization method. Its essence lies in the fact that the child is placed in situations associated with an area that causes him anxiety and fear, starting with those that can only slightly worry him, and ending with those that cause severe anxiety, perhaps even fright. To relieve stress, the child is offered to suck on the candy.

2. The method of "reacting" to fear, anxiety, tension. It is carried out with the help of a dramatization game "in a very scary, scary school", where, first with the help of parsley dolls and then without them in the form of theatrical sketches, children depict the situations of school life that frighten them, and all the frightening moments should be brought to an extreme degree (" so that the audience was very scared "). In addition, you can use the techniques of "drawing fears", "stories about fears", and the school theme should be emphasized. In the course of this work, attempts at a humorous, caricatured depiction of situations are in every possible way encouraged.

Conclusions for chapter 1.

The state of pure or, as psychologists say, "free floating", anxiety is extremely difficult to bear. Uncertainty, unclearness of the source of the threat makes the search for a way out of the situation very difficult and difficult. With anger, I can fight. When I feel sad, I can seek comfort. But in a state of anxiety, I can neither defend myself nor fight, because I do not know what to fight and defend against.

As soon as anxiety arises, a number of mechanisms are activated in the child's soul that "process" this state into something else, albeit also unpleasant, but not so unbearable. Such a child may outwardly give the impression of being calm and even self-confident, but it is necessary to learn to recognize anxiety and “under the mask”.

Many psychologists have worked on the problem of "anxiety" in children.

So, for example, Evgeny Ivanovich Rogov developed correctional work with students experiencing the so-called open anxiety, E.I. Rogov. offer a number of techniques, for example "pleasant memory", where the student is asked to imagine a situation in which he experienced complete peace, relaxation and as vividly as possible, trying to remember all the sensations or the "Smile" technique, where exercises are given to relax the muscles of the face.

Raisa Viktorovna Ovcharova identified ways to overcome anxiety in children, where the work of a teacher to relieve anxiety and fears can be carried out directly in the course of training sessions, when certain methods and techniques are used.

A. M. Prikhozhan developed methods and techniques for psychocorrectional work with anxiety, described the work on psychological education of parents and teachers. He developed correctional programs

A program for children entering school.

A program for students in the transition from primary to secondary.

A program to develop self-confidence and the ability to self-knowledge, etc.

Margarita Ivanovna Chistyakova in her book "Psychogymnastics" has developed exercises for relaxation, both individual muscles and the whole body, which will be very useful for anxious children.

Doctor of Psychology Mary Avord (USA) presented a set of exercises for muscle relaxation. The technique of working with children includes both physical stress and visualization (some representations).

Psychologists R. Tammla, M. Dorne, V. Amena have developed an anxiety test, the purpose of which is to study the child's anxiety in relation to a number of typical life situations of communication with other people.

Over the past 10 years, the number of anxious children of primary school age has increased. Anxiety has become deeper and more personal, the forms of its manifestation have changed. If earlier an increase in anxiety about relationships with peers was observed in adolescence, nowadays many primary school students are beginning to worry about their nature of interaction with other children.

Typically, anxious parents raise anxious children. What is their feature?
Characteristics of anxious children

Anxiety is defined as a persistent negative experience of anxiety and expectations of trouble from others. It is a deep emotional state resulting from the failure to meet important needs.


  • Anxious children are characterized by frequent manifestations of anxiety and fear, and fears and anxiety arise in situations in which the child, as a rule, is not in danger. Anxious children are especially sensitive, suspicious and impressionable. Such children are often characterized by low self-esteem, in connection with which they have an expectation of trouble on the part of others.

  • Anxious children are very sensitive to their failures, react sharply to them, tend to refuse such activities in which they experience difficulties.

  • Increased anxiety prevents the child from communicating, interacting with others, interferes with the formation of educational activity, in particular, a constant feeling of anxiety does not allow the formation of control and evaluative activity, and these actions are one of the main components of educational activity. And also increased anxiety contributes to the blocking of the psychosomatic systems of the body, does not provide an opportunity for effective work in the classroom.
Anxiety should be distinguished from anxiety. If anxiety is an episodic manifestation of anxiety, then anxiety is a persistent state. For example, it happens that a child is worried before performing at a party or answering at the blackboard. But this does not always manifest itself, sometimes in the same situations he remains calm. This is a manifestation of anxiety.

It is important to note that the state of anxiety cannot always be regarded as a negative state. Sometimes it is anxiety that becomes the reason for the mobilization of potential opportunities.

In this regard, mobilizing anxiety and relaxing anxiety are distinguished.
ANXIETY

MOBILIZING RELAXING

(gives an additional impulse) (paralyzes a person)

What type of anxiety a person will experience more often depends on the style of upbringing in childhood. If parents constantly try to convince the child of his helplessness, then in the future at certain moments he will experience a relaxing anxiety, but if, on the contrary, parents set up a son or daughter to achieve success through overcoming obstacles, then at crucial moments he will experience mobilizing anxiety.

Among the emotions included in the state of anxiety, fear is the key, although sadness, shame, guilt, etc., can be present in the "anxious" experience.

The emotion of fear is experienced by people at any age, however, so-called “age-related fears” are also inherent in each age. The presence of fears in a child is the norm, but if there are a lot of fears, then we should already talk about the presence of anxiety in the character of the child.

Anxiety, on the other hand, is not associated with any specific situation and is almost always manifested. Moreover, this state is present in any kind of activity, be it study, play, communication with strangers, etc.

The danger of such a state of the child is that, being constantly in tension, constantly restraining his internal energy, the child significantly expends his vitality, depletes his body, and this leads to frequent illnesses and developmental disorders.

Research in this area allows us to conclude that such socio-psychological factors as parents' dissatisfaction with their work, financial situation and living conditions have a significant impact on the appearance of anxiety in children.

Both boys and girls can be prone to anxiety, but experts believe that boys are more anxious in preschool age. By the age of 9-11, the ratio becomes even, after 12 years, there is a sharp increase in the level of anxiety in girls. At the same time, girls 'anxiety differs in its content from boys' anxiety: girls are more concerned with relationships with other people (quarrels, parting ...), and boys - about violence in all its aspects.


Types of anxiety


In such cases, it is difficult to fully understand what in the child's behavior is the result of upbringing, and what is inherited. Much depends on the innate character traits. For example, if anxiety manifests itself in a child with a melancholic temperament, such a child will always experience some emotional discomfort, slowly adapt to certain situations, and any change in his usual life deprives him of his mental balance for a long time.


  1. Age-related anxiety.
This anxiety is most commonly encountered in six-year-olds. The new unfamiliar environment scares the child, he feels insecure, does not know what to expect, and therefore experiences anxiety. The child may cry due to minor difficulties (forgot the ruler, leaked pen, parents came for him five minutes later, etc.). Teachers say about such children that they are just still small.

Indeed, getting older, the child reacts less emotionally to difficulties, gaining experience, he begins to transfer it to new situations. Feeling more competent, the child will be less afraid of changes and more quickly adapt to them.




Situational anxiety can be minimized, but not everyone can completely get rid of it - many adults still have anxiety before visiting a doctor, flying or taking an exam.


School anxiety is closely related to motivation for learning, status in the team, and learning success.

As they get older, the child reacts less emotionally to difficulties, feels more competent, he is less afraid of changes and adapts to changes faster.


Types of anxious children

  1. Neurotics. Children with somatic manifestations (tics, stuttering, enuresis, etc.) The problem of such children is beyond the competence of a psychologist, the help of a neuropathologist, psychiatrist is needed.
Such children need to be allowed to speak out, to ask parents not to focus on somatic manifestations. It is necessary to create a situation of comfort, acceptance for the child and minimize the trauma factor. It is useful for such children to draw fears, to act out them. Any manifestation of activity will help them, for example, hitting a pillow, cuddling with soft toys.

  1. Disinhibited. Very active, emotional children with deeply hidden fears. At first, they try to study well, if this does not work out, they become disciplinary offenders. They can deliberately expose themselves to ridicule in front of the class. They react to criticism with emphatic indifference. They are trying to drown out fear with their increased activity. Mild organic disorders are possible that interfere with successful studies (problems with memory, attention, fine motor skills).
Such children need a benevolent attitude of others, support from the teacher and classmates. We need to create in them a sense of success, help them believe in their own strength. In the classroom, it is necessary to give an outlet to their activity.

  1. Shy. Usually these are quiet children, they are afraid to answer at the blackboard, they do not raise their hands, they are inactive, very diligent in their studies, they have problems in establishing contact with peers. They are afraid to ask the teacher about something, they are very scared if he raises his voice (even to someone else), they often cry over little things, worry if they didn’t do something. They willingly communicate with a psychologist or teacher personally (individually).
Such children will be helped by a group of peers selected according to their interests. Adults should provide support, in case of difficulty, calmly offer ways out of situations, give more praise, and acknowledge the child's right to make mistakes.

  1. Closed. Gloomy, unfriendly children. They do not react to criticism in any way, they try not to enter into contact with adults, avoid noisy games, sit by themselves. There may be problems in learning due to lack of interest and involvement in the process. They behave as if everyone is expecting a trick. It is important to find in such children an area that they are interested in (dinosaurs, computer, etc.) and through discussion, communication on this topic to establish communication.

Causes of Anxiety in Children

Olga Knyazeva
Characteristics of children with different types of behavior

Characteristics of children with different types of behavior Currently, the attention of many psychologists around the world is drawn to the problems of child development. This interest is far from accidental, since it is found that the preschool period of life is the period of the most intensive and moral development, when the foundation of physical, mental and moral health is laid. The future of the child largely depends on the conditions under which it will proceed. At the same time, multiple factors influencing the socialization of the individual are also laid down and formed precisely in the preschool period of the child's development. The development of the psychology of a modern person is laid down at an early age and is predetermined by the pedagogical characteristics of the impact on him of society, the impact on him of the people around him and, above all, the people closest to the child, his family. This confirms the role that the psychologist-teacher plays in the formation of the personality, the formation of its psychological characteristics. In the upbringing and development of a preschooler, all the factors influencing the child are important - both family upbringing and upbringing in a preschool institution.

Demonstrative children. Communication and attitude of the child towards other people during preschool age change significantly. So, in the middle of preschool age (4-5 years), the need for recognition and respect appears and begins to dominate. If up to 3-4 years old children received direct pleasure from playing with toys, now it is important for them to know how people around them perceive and evaluate their actions. The child seeks to attract the attention of others, sensitively catches signs of attitude towards himself in their looks and facial expressions, demonstrates resentment in response to inattention or reproaches from partners. In children's communication at this age, a competitive, competitive beginning appears. The peer becomes the subject of constant comparison with himself. Through such a comparison of his specific qualities, skills and abilities, the child can evaluate and assert himself as the owner of certain merits. This stage is natural and necessary for the development of interpersonal relationships. By opposing himself to his peer and thus highlighting his I, the child can return to his peer and perceive him as an integral, self-valuable personality. Usually, by the age of 6-7, the ability to appreciate the qualities and skills of other people appears, the desire to be friends, help, do something together. However, demonstrativeness is often fixed and develops into a personality trait, a stable character trait. Such children are most concerned with showing their superiority in everything. The main motive for the child's actions is a positive assessment of others, with the help of which he satisfies his own hypertrophied need for self-affirmation.

Aggressive children. What is aggressiveness? The word "aggression" (from Lat. Aggressio) means attack, attack. If you open a psychological dictionary, then you can find such a definition of this term. Aggression is motivated destructive behavior that contradicts the norms and rules of coexistence of people in society, harming the objects of attack (animate and inanimate, causing physical harm to people (negative experiences, a state of tension, fear, depression, etc.).

Psychologists point out that there are two forms of aggression.

I. Benign aggression is persistent, non-hostile, self-protective behavior. It manifests itself at the moment of danger and is defensive in nature. As soon as the danger is eliminated, the manifestation of this form of aggression also disappears. Benign aggression can be detected from the first months of a child's life. This type of aggression is necessary for the normal adaptation of the baby to the environment, helps him to learn about the world, to assert himself.

2. Malignant aggression is hostile, malicious behavior that hurts other people. Of course, anger, rage, desire for revenge can also be a means of self-defense, but they nevertheless bring suffering and pain to others. Malignant aggression can occur spontaneously. This form of aggression does not manifest itself immediately after birth, it is activated in case of causing pain to the child or any unpleasant experiences or sensations. Sometimes, however, we may notice that the child takes pleasure in the fact that hurts another.

Surely among the children around you there is at least one child with signs of aggressive behavior. He attacks other children during games and activities, calls them names and beats them, selects and breaks toys. Sometimes such a child, for no apparent reason, begins to kick a peer who is playing next to him in the sandbox, swings and hits the first object that comes to hand, throws sand on the head and in the eyes of one of the children. When talking to an adult, he deliberately uses harsh language, even if he knows that he will be punished for it. If an adult refuses to buy him a chocolate or a toy, such a child can stomp on him, pounce on him with fists and furiously beat his mother, father or grandmother, shouting out all the hurtful and evil words known to him. When one of the children does not give up his seat on the swing, the aggressive child can push, hit with all his might, scream, pinch or bite the opponent. In a word, he becomes the "thunderstorm" of the children's collective, a source of grief. The children whom he offended are upset, the little aggressor himself, who was scolded or spanked, is upset, the parents, both of the offended child and the offender, are also upset. The ruffy, pugnacious, unbridled, rude kid who caused the conflict is very difficult to accept as he is, and even more difficult to understand.

Aggressive children are often unable to assess their own aggressiveness. They do not notice that they are instilling fear and anxiety in those around them; on the contrary, it seems to them that the whole world: both the surrounding children and adults - wants to offend them. Thus, a closed circle turns out: aggressive children are afraid and hate others, and those, in turn, are afraid of them and try to avoid meeting with little bully. This happened in the case of Savely.

The emotional world of aggressive children is not rich enough. The palette of their feelings is mainly dominated by gloomy tones, and the number of reactions even to standard situations is very limited, and most often these are defensive reactions. In addition, children cannot look at themselves from the outside and adequately assess their behavior, especially at an early age.

The reasons for the appearance of aggressiveness.

The reasons can be very varied. Certain physical or brain diseases can contribute to the manifestation of aggressive qualities. But, as practice shows, in preschool childhood, one of the reasons for the emergence of aggressiveness is the violation of child-parent relations. A warm relationship between parents and a child, adequate requirements for him, consistency in upbringing, consistency of requirements for the baby on the part of all family members are unlikely to provoke aggressive behavior.

The style of upbringing in the family plays a huge role, and from the first days of a child's life. Sociologist Mead has shown that in cases where a child is abruptly weaned from the mother's breast and communication with the mother is minimized, such qualities as anxiety, suspicion, cruelty, aggressiveness, and selfishness are formed in children. Conversely, where there is gentleness in communication with a child, the child is surrounded by care and attention, these qualities are not developed in children. If an atmosphere of hostility, intransigence reigns in the family, if mom and dad, mom and mother-in-law, grandmother and grandfather are in conflict with each other, if reproaches, deaf discontent, open outbursts of anger are common in the family, the child will most likely adopt just such a style of interaction with others. He simply will have no other pattern for his behavior.

The formation of aggressive behavior is also influenced by the nature of the punishments, which are more often chosen by parents in response to the manifestation of their child's anger. In such situations, parents can use two polar methods of influence: either leniency or strictness. It turns out that aggressive children are equally common among too "soft" parents and overly strict.

Shy kids.

“Well, what are you afraid of? Tell us a rhyme, because you know it perfectly! You can't be so cowardly. " At these words, the child shrinks with fear, tries to hide behind someone's back, forgetting everything that he really knows well. But adults try not to notice it. How many mental trauma shy children receive from illiterate, often harsh treatment of adults, while they need special sensitivity and tolerance from others. A survey of parents of 3-year-old children showed that some degree of shyness is characteristic of 42% of preschoolers.

How is shyness manifested?

Parents encounter this trait of their children most often in situations when they go to visit or receive guests at their place. The kid is shy at the sight of strangers, snuggles up to his mother, does not answer questions from adults. Shyness can be especially pronounced in kindergarten, where a child has to communicate with different teachers, respond in class, and perform at holidays. Sometimes such children are embarrassed to approach a group of peers, do not dare to join their game. As a rule, shyness is most pronounced in those activities that are new to the baby. He feels insecure, hesitates to show his ineptitude, he is afraid to admit it, to ask for help. In general, a shy child is kind to other people, including strangers, wants to communicate with them, but at the same time experiences great internal stress. It manifests itself in nervous movements, a state of emotional discomfort, fear of turning to an adult, to show one's desires. Sometimes such a kid does not respond to calls at all or answers in monosyllables, very quietly, even to a whisper. A characteristic feature of the communication of a shy child is its intermittent, cyclical nature: problems with communication can be overcome for a while, when he feels free and relaxed, and arise again in case of any difficulties. Observations show that shyness that arose in early childhood most often persists throughout preschool age. But it is especially clearly manifested in the fifth year of life. At this age, children develop a need for respect for an adult. The child reacts sharply to comments, takes offense at a joke, irony in his address, during this period he especially needs praise and approval. So parents and caregivers need to be especially attentive and delicate towards a shy child.