Help people become self-confident. How to be self-confident: advice from a psychologist, practical recommendations

Instruction

Remember that self-doubt is determined by the fears lurking in the mind. At the same time, the main one is the fear of how others will perceive your words, actions, appearance, what they will think about you, etc. etc. Knowing the cause of uncertainty, you can deal with it.

You need to do something, and you are unsure of yourself. Imagine that the worst thing that can happen in this situation has already happened. Accept it internally, accept it as a fact. For example, a guy wants to get acquainted with (or vice versa), but is afraid to take the first step - to approach, to say something. Fears: they will laugh at him, he will be denied reciprocity, he will look very stupid.

When you find yourself in this situation, evaluate your fears and accept that all this can happen. Moreover, accept the negative outcome as already accomplished, feel it. Everything has already happened, you have nothing to fear anymore. Therefore, nothing prevents you from approaching and saying the first words.

Use the tactics of small accomplishments. Find small daily challenges for yourself and overcome them. They can be outwardly quite insignificant - to ask someone about something, to do something in front of others. Overcoming your insecurities in small things, you will gradually begin to notice that it is easier for you to communicate with people.

If you have a big task ahead of you, break it down into a sequence of small actions, and then focus on completing them one at a time. This approach gives good results - you stop seeing a big complex task, instead of it there is a large number of small actions, each of which individually does not look so intimidating.

Always remember that the vast majority of people don't care about you. They don't care how you look, what you say, how you behave, etc. etc. If you are walking down the street, looking down and blushing at the mere thought that others are looking at you and might think something negative, relax - they are interested in their own problems and worries, but not you.

Learn to smile. Smiling is a great way to relieve stress. Smile, even if you are in a completely inappropriate mood for this, and you will immediately feel how fears and stiffness go away. The effectiveness of a smile as a means of combating uncertainty, stiffness, and stress is explained purely physiologically: people smile when they feel good and comfortable. Smiling in a situation where you don’t feel like smiling triggers a feedback mechanism that allows you to relax, feel more confident.

Choose the image of a totem animal, which, in your opinion, is associated with strength, dexterity, and confidence. Then try to feel like him. For example, while walking down the street, imagine yourself as a lion. The lion is the king of the jungle, no one and nothing can resist him. Feel in yourself its strength, calm grace, a certain laziness caused by a sense of your own power. Get into character and you will see that insecurity is gone, it is much easier for you to cope with what causes fear in you.

Self-confidence and self-confidence is not only an active life position, but also the key to success in any area of ​​life. Self-confident women reach the top of the career ladder, subjugate men and arouse admiration from others. There are several ways to develop a sense of self-confidence.

Instruction

The first thing you need to pay attention to is your demeanor. Strong natures move with confident steps, have impeccable posture and "royal" manners. A woman with all her appearance should command respect and admiration. Do not confuse self-confidence and. Pride and indifference to the opinions of others is not a sign of confidence. In this case, we mean a firm life position and focus on achieving your goals.

The second point is the appearance. Many may assume that a confident woman should definitely wear business suits and use a minimum amount of makeup. On the one hand, such traits may indicate confidence, but they are not its main features. A mischievous girl in jeans and a simple hairstyle can look much stronger than a strict lady in a pantsuit. The main thing is to present the image to others. If you decide to do an exotic make-up - show with your whole appearance that it is beautiful.

The third point is the attitude towards oneself. Never engage in self-flagellation and self-criticism. Criticizing your appearance and behavior, you only aggravate the situation. Smile at yourself in the mirror, compliment yourself, admire yourself. If you love yourself, then others will change their attitude towards you.

In conversations with others, never hesitate to express your opinion, even if it differs from the point of view of the majority. Play situations in front of a mirror and think about what arguments you can use to convince. Speak to the public more often, do not refuse the opportunity to speak in front of a large audience.

Justify yourself to others as little as possible. Even if you make a mistake, don't turn it into a lifelong problem. It is likely that success awaits you in a new business or in a completely different field of activity.

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Often insecure people try to hide their fear behind a mask of indifference or unruffled calmness. Here are some tips and tricks that will help you feel comfortable in any environment.

Instruction

The simplest things affect our lives. One of these things is a smile. Even if you are in a bad mood, try to smile and your mood will immediately rise. A smiling and smiling person looks happy, open, attractive to people and, of course, self-confident.

Fussiness is the first sign of discomfort. To boost your self-confidence, calm down and find a comfortable, relaxed posture. As you learn to express calmness on the outside, you will gradually become calmer on the inside as well.

Fear of direct eye contact betrays an indecisive and insecure person. Therefore, to show your confidence, look the person in the eye when talking, do not try to hide your eyes. This will let him know that he is heard and understood.

Many people start to giggle when nervous, which has nothing to do with healthy laughter. To prevent this from happening, avoid awkward situations. An open smile and laughter will say much more about you than inappropriate nervous laughter.

Talk more so you don't feel embarrassed. If you have nothing to say, then ask intelligent questions that can show your attentiveness and professionalism. And these are the qualities of a self-confident person.

In any conversation, sooner or later there comes a moment when questions begin to be asked to you. To increase self-confidence, you need to become a full-fledged participant in the conversation. And this implies goodwill and openness to interlocutors.

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How difficult it is sometimes for a teenager to assert himself in a team! Only a few become leaders, the rest are content with the role of “middle peasants”, and some, unfortunately, are outcasts. To help a teenager adapt in a social environment, to position himself correctly in a team, a sense of self-confidence is necessary. A few tips will help you work it out.

Pay no attention to any ridicule! After all, you can find a lot of reasons for them - for example, a funny surname, too small or, conversely, too large growth, features of the figure and build, poor eyesight, an unusual hobby, etc. etc. The main thing here is not to enter into a skirmish, no matter how insulting it may be. You need to learn to calmly look into the eyes of the offenders and shrug your shoulders indifferently. Everything! After two or three attempts, the teasers will lose all desire to continue - because they wanted to evoke negative emotions, enjoy the humiliation of the weak. And once the goal, then there is nothing to try.

Don't be afraid to stand out from your peers. An unusual hairstyle, clothes will allow you to be different from everyone else - the main thing is not to overdo it! Non-standard behavior first arouses interest, and then the desire to imitate. It has long been noticed: if, for example, a student at school during a break does not take part in common games, but steps aside and starts doing his own thing - drawing, playing a game, etc. - then soon the West class will gather around him. Worth a try!

Look after yourself! An impeccable appearance is the key to a good relationship with others. But people can be repelled, for example, by bad breath, sniffing, the sight of bitten nails, the smell of sweat from the armpits, etc. All this must be controlled! You can even make a special memo - what you need to check in your appearance, and view it before leaving the house.

Keep your head up high. Do not slouch, proudly straighten your shoulders, raise your chin - this is the image! You should learn to look directly into the eyes of the interlocutor when talking. And a charming smile will complete the “royal” look, disarm even negatively minded opponents.

Nothing in life can be achieved without self-confidence. It is faith in yourself that helps you not to retreat and find the strength to move on. Self-confidence is an acquired character trait, not an innate one. It is rare that someone is so lucky that he does not suffer from complexes and, over time, is not disappointed in himself. Self-confidence is formed due to character, personal qualities and hard work on oneself. Therefore, it is up to you how quickly you develop self-confidence.

You will need

  • Willpower and desire.

Instruction

Don't forget your successes. Very often, people focus not on their own achievements, but on what they failed to do. Of course, this is not bad if a person wants to correct the situation and achieve what he wants, but when this leads to a decrease in self-esteem and self-confidence, real problems begin. Therefore, as often as possible, remember those successes that you can rightly be proud of, or even better, write them down on a piece of paper and read it in the morning before the start of the working day and at night before bed.

Don't beat yourself up for failures. If you make a mistake, analyze what happened, correct what you can and move on. There is no point in constantly remembering what happened. What was, is gone. It is more important not to repeat your own mistakes and learn to avoid wrong decisions, but you should not be afraid to take responsibility either. There are no ideal people in the world.

Don't live in the past. Don't expect everything to change tomorrow. Live today, here and now. The future has not yet arrived, and the past has disappeared over the horizon. If you constantly dream or remember how good it was before, you will not notice how life has gone. Nothing is more demoralizing than postponing your plans for tomorrow.

Appreciate what you have. The greatest happiness of a person is always the ability to enjoy what he has. This is not as easy as it might seem at first glance, but it is necessary for a fulfilling life. In addition, this will allow you not to make a mistake in choosing what else you would like to receive from this life. After all, sometimes people are chasing what they absolutely do not need.

Don't let anyone humiliate you. Neither loved ones, nor friends, nor relatives have the right to criticize your personal qualities. You can only criticize the actions of others when they directly affect someone's interests. Therefore, do not confuse the desire to help you with advice and gross interference in your life. Although usually advice should be given only to those who ask for it.

note

When communicating with officials, operate with laws, remember your own rights and their duties. As soon as they try to put pressure on you, to declare that they know better what to do, do not get lost, but immediately remind them of their own rights, the rights of a citizen and a person. It is very important to stop their attempts to suppress you and force you to back down in time. And for this, read the laws, because for a skillful conversation with civil servants it is necessary.

Confidence is what defines our whole life. Depending on the degree of confidence of a person, a circle of his acquaintances, friends, the field of activity where he manifests himself, and many other characteristics are formed. But many of us are not yet fully confident in ourselves, so we have not yet been able to achieve everything that we would really want. This article aims to help people suffering from insecurity syndrome overcome their illness.

1. Always think about yourself.

This does not mean that you have to become selfish. This means that you should not think much about other people with whom you have to talk, get acquainted, meet. All conversations must be spontaneous. Therefore, you should not think much about extraneous phenomena. Just do what you want and need to do, and the rest will come into your life on its own.

2. Never despair.

Mistakes happen to everyone. No one can boast of a perfectly clean reputation. But the fact that mistakes teach is indeed true. Therefore, do not be afraid to try yourself in various roles and fields of activity.

3. Be interested in what is happening around you.

Don't lock yourself in. Attend events and meetings that interest you. And do not think about what will happen there and how other participants will react to you. Enjoy the moments and it doesn't matter what others say.

4. Keep in touch with different people.

Never try to get away from reality for a long time. Yes, it is a fact that sometimes each of us needs time to be alone with ourselves, but when this solitude drags on for weeks, months and even years, then you doom yourself to loneliness.

5. Keep a positive attitude.

Smile at passers-by, say compliments and don't worry about how you will look like, what you will say. Sincerity has always been in fashion, so keep positive energy and give it to others.

Many people ask themselves the question: "What to do to become confident?". Self-confidence allows you to feel happy and be successful in any field. There are many ways to become self-confident.

1. Always smile. Always find a reason to be happy. A good mood always allows you to win over people and look confident.

2. Learn to respect and love yourself. A confident person always respects himself and is proud of himself. Don't worry about your shortcomings. Pay more attention to your strengths.

3. Stop comparing yourself to other people. Understand that each person is unique and there is no reason to compare yourself to other people. A person who compares himself to other people will always experience feelings of envy and self-doubt.

4. Don't give in to other people's opinions. Never take someone else's opinion seriously. Confident people always have their own opinion and do not depend on the opinions of other people.

5. Don't criticize yourself, praise yourself.. Get rid of the habit of criticizing yourself. Get into the habit of praising yourself all the time. If you begin to praise yourself more often, you will feel self-confidence.

6. Be always calm. People very often turn a small problem into a tragedy. Do not worry too much about some small problem. Understand that any problems can be solved. Look at life easier, and you will feel self-confidence.

7. Choose your environment. You need to have real friends who will support and help you. With real friends, you will feel real self-confidence.

8. Don't be afraid to fail. You don't need to be afraid of mistakes, you need to learn from them. Mistakes teach us valuable lessons. So try to make the most of your mistakes.

Self-improvement is the path to inner harmony and self-confidence. Let's figure out exactly what actions give us this very confidence.

Collect information about yourself

To work on yourself, you need to understand exactly what you are dealing with. The approach in the style of the most charming and attractive, of course, is good, but it still prevents us from seeing shortcomings in ourselves, correcting which, we will become much better. Arm yourself with a pen and a piece of paper and break down your personality into areas of life that are important to you. Maybe you don't know how to listen and because of this you don't develop relationships with people. Maybe you are very impulsive when shopping and therefore cannot get your financial affairs in order. Or maybe you just can’t decide to take life into your own hands and stop living with an eye on the opinions of others, who knows?

There would be a wish

Everything is possible, you just have to want it, including a total struggle with your shortcomings. Of course, the process is difficult and painstaking, requiring a certain amount of willpower, but if you sincerely decide that it's time to change something, no one will force you to turn off the path you have chosen to improve yourself. There will be moments of weakness, of course, but they will not have a significant impact on the final result. If you sincerely want to become better, you will succeed.

Give kindness to the world

Negative emotions towards ourselves, people around us and the world can significantly spoil our self-esteem, while a kind attitude raises it to the skies. Be kind to people, do good deeds, even small ones. For example, donating 100 rubles to an animal shelter or paying for an old woman's purchases in a supermarket is not such a big deal, but very, very important.

Make a "list of rules"

Each person should have their own set of principles. This will help you make the right decision in a difficult situation, because such a moral sheet will serve as a road map for your whole life. By putting personal principles and goals ahead of people and circumstances, you will very soon gain not only self-confidence, but also respect from others.

Speak slowly

It just so happened that the more calmly you speak, the better the interlocutor perceives the information transmitted to him. Very often, politicians and public figures use this feature of our brain to convey some idea or news to the masses. You can also learn to speak more slowly and calmly, and your communication with others will become much more successful.

Watch your posture

In fact, posture is everything. As soon as you turn your shoulders, straighten your back and lift your chin proudly, your whole look and mood are completely transformed, and you look much more confident and attractive than before. Self-confidence depends primarily not on beauty, but on inner feelings.

Constantly improve your competence

Learn every day, every minute, every second. You can choose any one area or "pick up the tops" from each interesting area, it's not so important. The most important thing is not to stop in your development. The more useful you do for yourself, the more you learn and the better you are, the more confident you are.

Say goodbye to bad habits

If it's too hard for you to stop eating sweets or smoking instantly, start with small steps. For example, get rid of the habit of putting off washing dishes until later. Stop staying up late in front of the TV. Get up every day 5-10 minutes earlier than the day before. These small steps will help you train your willpower and realize that you are, in fact, the only master of your life. This realization gives a great feeling of confidence.

go in for sports

Sport brings up not only strength, but also spirit. Regular exercise will help you get to know yourself and your body, understand "what kind of dough you are made of." Also attending training requires willpower and a certain level of discipline. In addition, they improve the overall appearance, which also increases confidence.

A well-groomed appearance is the result of daily work on oneself. And here the girls are divided into two categories. The first works on himself and his appearance, acquires good habits. The second category of girls envies them. Being stylish is not so difficult, for this it is enough to know a few secrets.

Get ready in the evening. Think over your image in the evening. This will allow you not to waste your morning hours trying to find the right clothes. The main thing here is to find out the weather for the next day.

Choose your underwear carefully. This is exactly what creates your image. Properly selected underwear helps to emphasize the figure and improve the silhouette.

Choose clothes according to the weather. Stylish girls always dress according to the weather, this allows them to feel comfortable and confident.

Choose the style that suits you. Choose clothes that suit your lifestyle and body type.

Add some bright details. The right accessories will help turn ordinary clothes into festive ones. It can be a scarf, an expensive bag, large earrings or a belt. However, remember that there can not be many accessories, otherwise you risk “overloading” the image.

Change at home. As soon as you come home, change your clothes. Thus, your outfits for going out will be able to maintain a presentable look for a long time.

Prepare for Trouble. Carry a needle and thread with you at all times. They will come in handy if you have to sew something up or you rub a corn.

Create your style. Never wear things that don't suit you, even if they are trendy. It is better to choose what betrays you attractiveness.

Shoes for the occasion. Always choose shoes according to style and event. In some cases, shoes may look out of place, in others, ballet flats will look too simple.

Low self-esteem is not the best assistant on the path to success and self-realization. Even realizing why insecurity has arisen, it is not always possible to gain self-confidence. What is it connected with? Most likely with the degree of neglect of such a state. Like a disease that is quite easy to treat in the early stages and much more difficult if not done in time. So the uncertainty that has been sitting in a person for years, eventually becomes a part of his life. Is there a way out of this situation? How to gain self-confidence after many years of being "below the floor"? First of all, raise your head, open your eyes and start reading this article.

Techniques to help you gain self-confidence

We will not analyze the reasons that underestimate self-esteem. After all, recommendations on how to gain self-confidence work equally effectively, regardless of why a person has become less confident in his abilities. The reasons are not so important, because they are already in the past. Much more important are the ways to help fix everything, because the future depends on them. The only thing we can advise is to go through in order to understand exactly how hard you have to work.

So, to increase self-esteem will help:

  • Diary of success;
  • Active lifestyle;
  • Friends and relationships;
  • Interesting hobby;
  • daily affirmations;
  • Attention to your appearance;
  • Motivational videos or books.

If you use all the items from this list, gaining self-confidence will be even easier and faster.

Diary of success

Sometimes, "trying to reach for the stars", people do not notice life itself, ceasing to enjoy it. For example, just because someone had one failure at a new job doesn't mean they haven't made dozens of victories at something else. Why dwell on failure when there are achievements? A good tip on how to gain self-confidence is to start a Success Diary, where you write down all your daily victories. It is not necessary to wait for new achievements, you can remember what has already been done and start writing it down, regularly adding new achievements. In those moments when conceit begins to suffer, and hands fall, it is enough to reread this diary, reminding yourself of your victories.

Active lifestyle

In order for the Success Diary to turn into a real library, it is advisable to accustom yourself to an active lifestyle. Every day gives many opportunities for self-realization. If you do not miss them, then it will become obvious how to gain confidence. For example, you can enroll in graphic design courses, successfully complete them, get a certificate and, thereby, increase your self-esteem. Or, go to dances, becoming more confident in discos. If there is no desire or opportunity to spend money, then there are dozens of free activities: all kinds of flash mobs, exhibitions, literary evenings, volunteer projects, social initiatives, etc. It is enough just to google posters or announcements of your city. The search engine will instantly issue dozens of offers for the near future.

Friends and relationships

The more active a person is, the wider his social circle is, the more likely he is to find a company and meet his love. True friends will always support and come to the rescue, and a life partner will not let you doubt your personal significance. But for them to appear, you need to get up from the couch and leave the house. Social networks or mobile applications, for all their potential, will never replace relationships and friendships. But some joint project or a real hobby will definitely tell you how to gain confidence and find like-minded people.

A person's hobby is an occupation that is to their liking, and, accordingly, the desire to engage in it is much stronger than studying or working. If a person does something with interest, then success in this type of activity is much more real. Accordingly, a hobby is a great option for gaining self-confidence. For example, some office worker, with no particular career prospects, may be a top-notch martial arts instructor. In addition to the purely psychological aspect associated with an increase in self-esteem, a hobby very often becomes a matter of a person’s whole life, gradually providing him with income and recognition.

Daily affirmations

How to gain confidence in yourself if you have doubts about your abilities? In addition to working on ourselves, it is advisable to practice self-hypnosis - regular repetition of how wonderful and successful we are. This practice is called affirmations - a clear setting that attracts the expected changes in a person's life. For example, it is difficult for someone to get a job because they are not sure of their potential. If such a person begins to repeat to himself every morning, looking in the mirror, one simple phrase: “I am very promising, all employers are interested in me, the best job is mine,” then gradually he himself will believe in it. And self-confidence ensures the achievement of goals.

Attention to your appearance

An equally important item for men and women. Of course, there are specifics, but being well-groomed, clean and fit is important for everyone. It is not necessary to spend significant money for this. Clothing can be simple, but neat and tastefully selected. Expensive gyms can be replaced with a free sports ground or a treadmill in a nearby park. You will see for yourself how much easier it will be to gain self-confidence, if you are confident about your appearance.

Motivational videos or books

The Internet is full of all kinds of motivators or success stories that are freely available. They literally explain everything. How to gain self-confidence, how to meet a girl, how to get a job, how to build a fusion reactor in the kitchen. Anything. There is even a book "How to control the Universe without attracting the attention of orderlies." So, instead of just another soap opera or a highly intellectual show, you can, for a change, read or watch something inspiring. Who knows, maybe one of these motivators will drastically change someone's life, showing the way to success and recognition.

Asking the question “How to gain self-confidence?” - this is very good and right. A person, at least, realizes that something is wrong in his life and it should be corrected. There is no need to be ashamed of this. Worse, when someone does not even realize that his self-esteem is low. If he is regularly told that he deserves more than he takes away for himself, this is an occasion to think about it and make every possible effort to gain self-confidence. After all, adequate self-esteem makes life much easier and allows you to fully realize yourself.

How difficult and long way you need to walk in order to educate and grow it in yourself?

I wonder how faith in one's own strength and trust in one's own personality begins? Your opinion?

It turns out that confident behavior is the result of confident thinking. How a person presents himself, so he looks. And he acts on the basis of internal attitudes, ideas about himself.

How to become confident?

You can start with the simplest thing - to portray a confident person in any life situations. In the supermarket, in the pool, on the street, among colleagues, in the subway. Here the well-known law of the transition of quantity into qualitative changes will work. You will show more, with each action you will become more confident. Step, one more, next. And the process has begun! With every step better, more natural, more persistent.

So you can outsmart your thinking, fixated on patterns. You can easily and unobtrusively rebuild, imagining yourself as an actor who selflessly and talentedly plays a role. You decide when to release the actor on stage, when to turn the "switch" to turn it off. You are in complete control of the situation. We decided that at the party you will be embarrassed - there will be strangers there, so go ahead. Feel good! With all my might! Tired? Flip the "switch" - choose confident behavior, communicate on an equal footing, with dignity and self-respect.

How to look confident?

Absolutely in the history of your life there were moments when you were a confident person.

Remember them.

Perhaps in childhood, when you helped your little sister fasten her sandals, or at school, when you recited a learned poem with pleasure. Or in your youth, when you won in sports.

Or in situations where you were among close and dear people, when you spoke to an audience or talked with some person.

Reproduce in your memory the intonations, how you spoke, how you breathed, how you moved, how you gesticulated, what position were you in? How did the voice sound, what did the face express, what were the sensations?

Now, in order to "turn on" a confident person in yourself, repeat all this, copy the posture, pace and volume of speech, gestures - enter the desired state. There is no need to invent anything, you have already been in this place - in the body, you were such a person, now you remember this and make it your natural state.

When you are self-confident, others perceive your dignity, self-confidence, self-respect. And they strengthen you even more in these feelings.

  1. Space. A confident person settles well in space. Fully occupy the proposed chair or armchair, lean back, use the armrests. Make broad gestures, on a grand scale, expanding your area of ​​​​influence. Differ from the insecure, who, on the contrary, tends to shrink, shrink, take up as little space as possible, sit on the edge of the chair, limited to mean gestures.
  2. No fuss. Is there a model of a confident person for you? Who is this? Margaret Thatcher? Angelina Jolie? Ivan Urgant? Sylvester Stallone? Or someone else? Imagine your ideal, which nervously bounces in a chair, fidgets, intensely fiddling with a tie, pounding a drum roll with his fingers on the table. Yes, it's hard to imagine. Confidence is incompatible with vanity. Take her away.
  3. Straight posture. In any position, standing and sitting, maintain an even posture. It allows you to radiate confidence, feel it and look like a confident person. Practice: chest forward, shoulders back, keep your head level in a horizontal and vertical plane. Imagine that a string comes out of your crown and pulls you into the sky. Remember this posture and merge with it.
  4. The pace of speech. When someone chatters, speaks quickly, it is difficult for him to be confident and independent. A confident person speaks with feeling, with sense, with an arrangement, without tension. He knows that he will not be interrupted, he will be allowed to speak. The pace of speech is average, smooth. Take it as a rule, the more you worry, get nervous, the slower and calmer you speak, pause. Speak as if you are communicating with a child and it is important for you that he understands you.
  5. Me, me and me again. Speak in the first person. Use phrases: I think, I think, I decided, I found out, I support, I disagree, I think differently. Feel free to express exactly your opinion, do not hide behind the streamlined and impersonal “we”, “all”, “joint decision”, “everyone”. Avoid excuses!
  6. Eye contact. A confident person shifts the focus from themselves to others. He is not fixated on himself, he is interested in the interlocutor and the world around him. Therefore, a direct open look is very important and helps to be confident, makes people understand your interest. In communication, you connect not only your hearing, but also an additional channel of perception, “listen with your eyes”, perceive and understand the interlocutor more clearly.
  7. Dignity. Take the example of the king of beasts, the lion. What plasticity, strength and power he has in his movements. Slowly, with dignity, confidently, elegantly. To be more confident, slow down your movements. Move like a king. Your movements should be smooth, meaningful, thoughtful, unhurried.
  8. Acceptance of yourself and others. Be calm, friendly and benevolent, even if the interlocutor does not agree with you or you with him. Believe in yourself, in your point of view. Yours doesn't make people think the same way you do. Yours is to be respected.
  9. Gesture of a confident person - spire gesture. The fingertips of one hand touch the tips of the other hand at an acute angle, forming a spire. This is a signal of confidence and calmness. Use it as an additional way to confidently behave.
  10. Don't try to please everyone. You need to be good, first of all, for yourself. Your confidence should not depend on how, when and how they evaluate and accept you.
  11. Pauses. Insecure people are afraid of silence, they are afraid of silence and quickly break it. You do not need to "get out of your skin" to fill every second, albeit meaningless, but chatter. Pause before answering. small. One or two seconds. Think about what you heard, what the interlocutor wanted to convey to you. This will give you confidence and help you master the situation in communication.
  12. Laugh. Don't giggle. You are not in the circus. Giggling is a sign of insecurity and instability. Appreciate good jokes: smile or laugh quietly.
  13. Nodding disease. If you listen to the interlocutor and agree with him, you don’t need to continuously nod your head - you are not a “Chinese dummy”. You are a serious, confident person. A couple of head tilts in agreement are sufficient.
  14. Secret and obvious. Being in any situation: in or with people, in the rays of the sun or in the dark - do not do what you will be ashamed of in front of you. Act in accordance with your principles, do not prevaricate, and she will reward you with the foundation of the foundations on which self-confidence and high self-confidence will be kept.
  15. I don't know and I'm not afraid. If you want to be trusted, never be afraid to admit that you don't know something. “I have not yet faced such a challenge. Right now I don't have an answer to that question." It is impossible to know everything. Realize this and speak boldly about what you do not know. This will help you further build your confidence.

Friends, everyone has absolutely everything they need in order to be sure, starting today, from this moment. You do not need to read additional literature for this, make an appointment with a psychologist, or undergo trainings. Just decide to be the confident person, flip the switch and turn on the new personality. Good luck!

Video for you "Confidence is the key to victory."

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Some people think that self-confidence is a genetic trait. Either you are born a confident person or you are not. If you also hold this opinion, and you lack self-confidence, then after reading this article, you will have to admit that your opinion is wrong. Everyone can develop self-confidence. By changing their thinking and behavior, each person can become a self-confident person. If you want to become a self-confident person, by all means read this article.

Steps

Part 1

Work on the right mindset

    Be proud of your strengths. If you want to become a confident person, the first thing you need to do is think about what you already have. Perhaps you think that you are the most ordinary person, no different from other people. In addition, you may think that other people are much better and more attractive than you. However, if you want to become a confident person, you need to change your mindset! Make a list of your positive personality traits. It could be the ability to listen well or having a beautiful voice. These positive traits may mean nothing to you. But in fact, you have a lot to be proud of.

    • If you like the idea of ​​creating a list of your positive personality traits, try to keep that list handy at all times. Add to the list whenever you think: “Oh, right, I can do this too ...” When you feel down or feel like you are worthless, look at the list and you will definitely feel better.
    • Talk to a close friend about it. Ask him to name your strengths. Your friend can name such character traits that you think are not inherent in you. Remember, you can see it from the side!
  1. Work on becoming an optimist. Of course, it is impossible to become an optimist quickly, just as it is impossible to build Rome in one day. However, this does not mean at all that you should not take on this matter. Develop the ability to be optimistic about the future. Optimism and confidence often go hand in hand. People who hope for a good future believe that something good will happen to them if they put in the necessary effort. Monitor your thinking, paying attention to how many negative thoughts you have during the day. Work on replacing one negative thought with at least three positive ones. With effort, you will very soon look at the world in a positive way.

    • The next time you spend time with your friends, tell them about the exciting events that are happening in your life or what you are looking forward to. You will notice that the attitude towards you from your friends will become better. Your mood will also improve significantly.
  2. Get ready. If you are ready for any situation - within reason, of course - you can become a confident person. If you have to take a math exam in the near future, set aside enough time to prepare. If you'll be showing your presentation to classmates, practice until you've finished your presentation. If you are going to a party, you must collect the necessary information related to the upcoming event. For example, you should know who will be at the party when it starts, as well as other important details. Thanks to this, you will not worry about what awaits you in the evening. While it's impossible to be fully prepared for any given situation, which is part fun and part life's secret, preparation will certainly help you feel more confident.

    • If you can share something interesting with friends and contribute to the conversation, you will feel more confident than if you just sit and listen to others. Of course, you don't have to talk all the time to feel confident. However, try to speak often enough so that you can feel that you are making the conversation interesting.
    • You can draw on information to contribute to the conversation later by reading interesting articles, watching the news, or doing research on current events or topics that interest you. While chatting with friends, bring up a topic that you have been researching lately. You will feel confident because you have a lot of information on the topic under discussion.
    • If you have a certain amount of information or skill, such as making furniture or finding the right pair of prom shoes with ease, people may come to you for help. You will become a more confident person if you help and benefit others.
  3. Stop comparing yourself to other people. Focus all your attention on yourself and on achieving your goals, instead of looking at your neighbor and lamenting that you are not as attractive / smart / confident as he is. Be kind to yourself and focus on your dreams and goals. Be proud of yourself when you achieve your goal.

    Get rid of sources of negativity. Unfortunately, it is impossible to get rid of everything that can make you feel despondent. However, you can make an effort to surround yourself with positive people and situations. Heed the following tips:

    Part 2

    Go to action
    1. Embrace the unknown. If you're having self-confidence issues, chances are you're not interested when you think about something new. However, if you want to become a confident person, try doing something new for yourself. For example, try meeting new people at a party and tell them about yourself, join a dance club even if you can't dance at all, or send your resume to a company you can only dream of getting a job at. The more time you devote to doing something new, the more secure you can feel, because you will understand that you can handle any situation in life. Mentioned below are some tips to help you embrace the unknown:

      • start small. Try starting a conversation with someone you see often but never interact with, such as the boy who sits next to you in math class or your neighbor;
      • plan a trip to a new place, for example, visit a small town that is 80 km from your home. Make it a habit to visit new places and get to know something new for yourself;
      • start learning a foreign language. By doing something new, you will experience pleasure, and feel more self-confidence.
    2. Be prepared to take risks. If a person is willing to take (reasonable) risks, they are more likely to learn something new and assert themselves as a person. If you want to become a more confident person, don't limit yourself to something new for yourself, try to do things that cause fear and confusion in you. Of course, not always, taking risks, you will achieve something great. However, you can develop the habit of putting yourself in a difficult situation and trying to get out of it. By taking risks, you will expand the boundaries of the possible for yourself, and will not be limited to things that are familiar to you. You will understand that you can do a lot.

      • Set a goal to get out of your comfort zone at least once a day. Try talking to someone you like. Ask him out on a date.
      • If you are dissatisfied with your job but are afraid of losing it, try sending your resume to another company. Even if nothing comes of it, you have little to lose.
      • Learn to overcome fear when you experience it. Don't bungee jump if you're afraid of heights. Try to take the elevator to the top floor of a ten-story building and look out the window. Through this, you will be able to understand that you can overcome what causes your fear.
    3. Spend time with people who make you feel good. Enlisting the support of loved ones, you can become a self-confident person. If you spend a lot of time with people who support each other and are ready to help when needed, you will become a confident person. Spend as much time as possible with people in whose company you feel good.

      • Hanging out with confident people can be a big help for you. Instead of being jealous of them, ask yourself, "What do they do differently, and how can I develop these qualities?" You will find that confident people are not better than you, they just think positively of themselves.
    4. Do your favorite thing. If you do what you love, you will be a happy and harmonious person. Thanks to this, you will become a self-confident person. If you do what you love, the creative side of your personality will improve, due to which you will notice significant changes in yourself, both in the workplace and in communication with other people. In addition, a hobby helps you find people with similar interests and gain their support, which is very important for your well-being.

      Work on making your body language reflect your self-confidence. Make sure your back is straight. Correct posture will make you feel more confident. If you slouch all the time, other people will think that you are unhappy with yourself and will treat you as someone who lacks self-confidence. Instead, keep your back straight and your shoulders back.

      Watch your appearance. If you set aside enough time to take care of your appearance, very soon you will begin to perceive yourself differently, appreciating your virtues. If you want to become a self-confident person, follow the rules of personal hygiene: take a daily shower, comb your hair and keep your clothes clean and tidy. If you don't take care of your appearance, others will see that you don't spend enough time taking care of yourself, and this will reflect on their attitude towards you.

    Part 3

    Improve yourself
    1. Learn from mistakes. Self-confident people do not always succeed in everything. Faced with failure, they do not give up, but continue on their way. They learn from their mistakes, drawing valuable lessons that will be useful to them in the future. The next time you get a bad grade on a math test, fail a job interview, get rejected, ask the person you like out on a date, don't give up. Try to learn valuable lessons from the current negative situations. Of course, sometimes life gives us unpleasant surprises and each of us can become a victim of bad luck. However, do your best to correct the situation and succeed next time.

      • Many are familiar with the phrase: "If it didn't work the first time, then ...". Actually this is a true statement. Think about how boring life would be if everything worked out for you. Instead, see failure as an opportunity to reach your goal next time.
      • It is important to admit your mistake and accept the unpleasant consequences associated with it.
    2. Go in for sports. Of course, after one exercise session, you are unlikely to experience the full health benefits. However, if you exercise for at least 30 minutes every day or several times a week, you will feel better. Physical exercise stimulates the production of endorphins, which makes a person feel happy and satisfied, and it also has a beneficial effect on his physical health. This is a win-win. Exercise when it suits you and you will become a confident person.

      • Think about how exercise opens up an opportunity to get out of your comfort zone and try new things. You may feel nervous at the thought of having to attend a yoga or zumba class, but trust me, once you attend your first class, you will realize that your fears were unfounded.
      • You just need to be yourself. Don't let anyone force you to be different, that's the only way you can truly be a confident person.
      • Remember, within each person there are hidden possibilities. Engage your best self by setting goals. Success is the true key to self-confidence.
      • Walk with your head held high, keep your shoulders back and look straight ahead.
      • Praise yourself and say nice things to yourself every night before bed.
      • Strive to have good relationships with other people. Do not offend people, because this can turn against you and lead to a loss of self-confidence. Don't be rude.
      • Do your best to make a good impression on people you know and strangers.