Good to know 

How to make my son learn well. In what cases do you need a psychologist? How to make a child study in high school: practical advice of a psychologist

Study at school is far from all children gives joy, and the performance of homework sometimes becomes a real test for the whole family. The child is ready to do anything, just not boring tasks. Parents, not knowing how to behave, often make mistakes, only aggravating the situation. How to convince the schoolchildren to do lessons? How to make the learning process to become interesting and entertaining for him?

Find out the cause - half of success

Before solving problems with learning, adults should find out why the child does not want to learn and perform homework. Such a position may explain the most different reasons:

  1. There is no motivation to study, understanding why it is generally needed.
  2. Elementary laziness (due to the character of the child).
  3. The schoolboy is afraid to make a mistake, knowing that parents will scold him.
  4. Overwork. In addition to school, the child visits more, for example, a drawing circle and a sports section.
  5. Conflicts in the educational institution. If the son or daughter in the class is offended, ridiculed, naturally, studies moved to the background, because the child is immersed in psychological problems.
  6. The student does not understand the particular item, and the homework on it, respectively, perceives as a continuation of school torture.
  7. Dependence on gadgets. The child is simply not interesting to learn when there are such fascinating achievements of modern technologies.

First of all, it is necessary to find out why the child does not want to do lessons - perhaps he is afraid to make mistakes and pour out parents or, for example, do not make up relations with classmates

Video: Why do children do not want to learn

How to influence the child

After finding out the cause of the reluctance to learn (during the frank conversation with the child, the teacher, by his observations) should already take concrete measures. The main thing is to behave extremely delicately, to be patient, but at the same time perseverance.

  1. Creating motivation. It is necessary to explain to your chad more accurately, why he needs to learn, using for this not foggy concepts ("You have to make a career, take a certain position in society"), and quite simple: you need to get a profession. This will make it possible to find a good job to buy yourself everything you need, ride to relax, in your free time to do your favorite thing. In addition, it is important to indicate the spiritual component of studies: the result will be valuable knowledge that cannot be bought for money.

    It is very important to create a motivation to the child - you need to get a profession to make money on the desired things, for example, on a car

  2. Personal example. Before instructing the child, adults must analyze their identity - their own attitude to work, home duties. It is well demonstrate that study, for example, for Pope has always been at an important place, and mom and today continues to learn: independently mastering another foreign language, the online course of painting or some online specialty.

    Wonderful if mom or dad continues to learn, self-improvement, for example, mastering the online course of painting

  3. Tighten the concrete subject (for example, physics or chemistry that are well understood not all children). An adult can do it himself, in difficult cases it is worth hired tutor.

    If a schoolboy has a difficulty subject, parents need to pay close attention to him or hire a tutor

  4. Pay attention to health, adjust the day of the day to eliminate fatigue. Perhaps you will have to give up a section to a section or a circle, if it really takes a lot of strength from a child (sometimes younger students go to additional classes not so much in their will, how much because of the ambitious parents). Interestingly, experts found out that the best time to perform homework is the period from 15.00 to 18.00: at this time, the student's brain exhibits high performance. After school, you do not need to immediately plant a child for the lessons: lunch and rest is required at least for 30 minutes.

    The day of the day is very important - after school, the child must have to dine and some time rest and only then take for lessons

  5. Fight with addiction from gadgets (tablet, computer, phone). You do not need to completely prohibit them, but only limit the time of use, convince your son or daughter that there are many other interesting activities.
  6. Resolution of school conflicts with classmates. Often helps a frank conversation with the teacher (especially in elementary school). If everything is very serious, it is worth solving the question of radically - change the class or even school.

    Sometimes resolve conflicts with classmates helps a frank conversation with a teacher, in difficult situations there is a translation of a child to another class and even school

  7. We have organized in schoolboy, independence. It is important to explain to your childhood that the performance of lessons for him is a duty (the same thing is that for parents work). Here you need to show the consequences of the child's actions: for example, quickly and qualitatively fulfilled the task - there was a time on the game, I did everything myself, without the help of my mother - at that time it prepared a delicious dish, my mother had to sit nearby and control the process - you have to wash for it dishes.
  8. Praise a schoolboy for the slightest successes and achievements, to unail confidence that there will be more important results. You need to use the phrases of the type "you get better and better!", "You will continue in the same spirit, you will soon do everything perfectly!" Even if the student's efforts led to failure (poorly wrote a control), you need to calm my son or daughter, to assure that the next time everything will be much better, the main thing is to do.

    It is very important to praise the child for the slightest achievement, to unail confidence that the next time everything will be even better

  9. It is more common to emphasize the positive qualities of the child, even if they are not directly related to the studies. For example, this charm, a desire to help others, etc. Self-esteem will rise, and the schoolboy will feel great confidence in its capabilities.

Parents should help the child to organize the process of doing homework itself. For example, it is better to start with the most complex objects (for example, for my second-grader's son, as for many other children, this is Russian), and then go to more easy. In no case do not need to emphasize the attention that a difficult task is to be (even if it is actually), on the contrary, it is necessary to inspire a schoolboy that everything is simple, and it will easily cope.

Age features of the problem

Very often, reluctance to learn and perform homework arises in the first grade. Often, parents themselves are to blame in such a situation - they regret "Baby", believe that they should not load the child to adapt better. In fact, the first year of study at school is the "golden time", which largely depend on further successes in study. From the very beginning, you need to give to understand the first-grader that a new life began, and homework - its mandatory, very important part.

Parents initially must inspire the baby that a new life began, and learn and perform homework must necessarily

Here the personality of the first teacher is of great importance. If a child loves him, trusts, then problems arise very rarely. When the baby is afraid of the teacher, there is no mutual understanding between them, it does not affect his studies and desire to perform homework.

Often, learning problems occur in transition (12-13 years old). This is due to the psychological difficulties of this period - publishes begins, the teenager conflicts with the surrounding adults, strives for self-expression, sometimes worries first in love. Many children on the background of all this takes out study, stroll lessons, neglect the homework, which naturally affects the estimates.

The task of parents is not to "eat" the son or daughter, but try to achieve mutual understanding, more often talk to the child, to delve into his experiences to overcome the difficulties of transitional age together.

In a difficult adolescence, many children begin to neglect learning, and parents exacerbate the situation with their reproaches

Video: How to help your child who does not want to do lessons (psychologist tips)

Typical parental errors

Trying to force my son or daughter to learn, perform homemade in advance, adults often make mistakes (often because parents have become similarly in childhood). Meanwhile, some things do it unacceptably - they will only aggravate the problem:

  1. To scold. Many children from it only closes in themselves, the desire to learn disappears completely. Making mistakes - Naturally, this is a way to get experience.
  2. Promise gifts for good estimates, perform a specific task. Adults consider it a good motivation, in fact, the child's requests will only grow, he does not realize that study is a daily responsibility that is necessary, first of all, not to parents, but him himself.
  3. Making lessons instead of a child (usually starts in elementary school). The kid understands that his duty is to just rewrite the task performed. As a result, he arises confidence that to achieve the goal, personal labor is optional, everything can be done at the expense of others. And this makes big problems - both at school and in general in life.
  4. Excessive control over the performance of his Chad. The child has the impression that everything in the world "rotates" is only around study. Of course, it is very important, but the rest of life also have considerable importance (family traditions, sports, communication with friends, the upbringing of valuable moral qualities).
  5. Excessive ambitious parents. Sometimes adults are really overestimated by the requirements: they seek not just to interest the student learning, to accustom to do lessons, but grow young giving. So, Mom makes rewritten homework due to the smallest things, seeking perfect implementation. Naturally, the child will have even greater reluctance to do anything.
  6. The use of physical punishment methods (notorious "belt"). If you keep a schoolboy in fear, he, of course, will learn, perform tasks, but there can be no speech about the psychological contact with adults. Sooner or later, the moment will come when the child will grow and can respond to an adult in the same vein. Another option is the formation of reduced self-esteem and mass of complexes.

To convince the child to learn, unacceptable punishment, especially the use of physical methods

Study for a schoolboy is the most true work with success and problems, takeoffs and falls. And it is useless to force your child to learn strength, to make lessons from fear of punishment. Parents must show all their tact and patience, respect in their son or daughter personality. The main thing is to create the right motivation from the child, then the desire to achieve the goal will appear, and passing difficulties are easy to be resolved with the participation of loved ones.

Everyone wants the child to be happy to go to school, without any problems performed homework, received good estimates ... In practice, it does not happen. And often not only for the child, but also for parents, school years are becoming heavy nonsense. How to change the situation, tells a psychologist, mom two children Yulia Samoilova.

Requires good estimates from children, parents misses more significant moments. The main thing, coming out of the walls of the school, the child should feel emotionally and physically healthy, psychologically strong and confident. And besides, he had such qualities in arsenal as attentiveness, independence, the ability to perform work efficiently and on time. And good estimates will be attached - as a result of the development of all this. Therefore, it is in this direction that the child needs to help.

Teach your homework on time

The child did not have anything time: in school catches the raven, the fulfillment of the task is stretched for 3-4 hours ... scolding a child for scattered meaninglessly, you need to teach organization. And let's make a reservation at once: this task is not a school and teachers (although they also contribute to the lept), but parents. Here is the main role and play homework. In essence, it has a completely unique meaning. This is the case he is obliged to fulfill independently, to answer him! Therefore, it is important to master the technique of doing homework, it will help him to learn well, and subsequently work successfully!

Teach to the regime of the day. Install remotes in your mobile phone. As practice shows, follow the clock itself on the wall more difficult. And if at that moment the child is busy with something interesting, it is unlikely to remember that the time has come to do lessons. The most optimal time to perform homework is 16 hours. During this period, the second peak of mental activity begins (the first falls on the morning hours). And before that time, the child should take a walk for several hours.

Planning homework. Some parents believe that they need to start doing homework with the most difficult tasks. This is mistake! If you start from the most difficult task, which causes a negative by the child, then gradually in his mind, homework will be associated with difficulties, so it will delay their execution. Start doing homework is necessary with your beloved item. This will create the desired training attitude and will be a kind of mental workout. Next, you should move to a more complex subject, then to the most complex and finally leave a simple subject. At the same time, planning homework, it is necessary to figure out the child, which subject he himself considers it easy, and which is complex.

Training skill for a long time to engage in some kind of activity. In the free time, play with a child in checkers, chess, lotto, domino. Take care to collect designers by the type "Summer", learn to collect large puzzles. Select time at this time. Such classes form the ability to focus.

Interested in school

Each child has a desire for knowledge. But one is in a developed state, and others are in the depressed. Regardless of whether your child is learned well or weakly, you should not forget about motivation to study. Parents can both strengthen it and reduce incorrect actions.

Follow the statement "Knowledge - Power". Do not detract the intellectual sphere. Children are very closely listening to what adults speak. Talking on the themes like: "I studied, I studied, and what a sense, in the market trades," it is better not to lead in the presence of a child. From the fact that someone from your acquaintances or you yourself could not take advantage of knowledge to get in life, knowledge does not become less valuable. More often, the examples of successful people, who, with the help of good education and knowledge, were able to achieve a lot. Already with younger classes, you need to explain in which fields of activity one or another item can be useful.

Use your favorite topic for cognitive interest. Each child has their own interests. Someone is passionate about dogs, someone - dinosaurs, someone - machine. Often, parents consider these hobbies useless and even swear when the child spends at this time. The behavior of parents destroys cognitive interest. It is necessary to encourage the desire of a child to any new knowledge. Do not disgust annoyed from questions, buy books on your items of interest, look together training films.

Do not hang labels! One of the big mistakes of the parents is a conversation on the topic, as a rule, when children: "My son is a typical physicist, and a lyrics daughter." Practice shows that in elementary school in 60% of children's ability to accurate and philological sciences. And we thus create the prerequisites for the fact that the child will record the subject in the unloved, it will be worse to manage to do it.

Do not scold for bad estimates! Negative assessment - the enemy of interest and creativity. And in itself the punishment for the child (even if he does not show this). It should be understood that the reasons for bad estimates can be the most different: from banal forgot to bring teaching aid to a lesson, before misunderstanding the topic, conflicts with a teacher and family problems (for example, a child can get bad grades to attract your attention). Your task to install the root cause and enjoy it. To scold him - the case does not help, but only reduce the motivation. The error is the requirement of higher grades in all subjects. We move the child, let him determine the limit of his strength and favorite items. As a rule, they are not more than three.

Praise the child. For any, even a little success. And if the training is working hard, bring up from him to faith in my strength, expressing anticipating assessment, for example: "You do everything correctly!", "I know you will succeed!" Praise not for the assessment, but for a specific achievement.

Create an emotional comfort zone

Learn is a big job. But parents, forgetting about their experience, often underestimate him. It seems to them, write in the register - trifle, learn the multiplication table and that easier ... as a specialist, I can say that the work that is fulfilling a child for the year can be compared with the operation of the miner. Therefore, the child is experiencing a constant voltage. The task of parents to organize atmosphere at home in such a way as to remove it.

Start the day sunny. "Get up immediately, you are late, get up to whom I say ..." Surely, many people remember their awakening to such words and under the loud call of the alarm. Meanwhile, the day, which began in this way, is preventing the positive wave, but, in addition, such an awakening is not possible for health. For the first reaction to too loud sounds - the cheating of the pulse ...

There is another intermediate solid state between sleep and wake. And the transition from sleep into it, and then the final awakening should be soft enough. To wake a child, intend it softly, turn on the gentle music. You can do household on time. And after about five minutes, it is already pogromated. This five-minute will allow the child to tune in for the coming day.

Get the magic bag. In his roles there may be ordinary multi-colored bags for garbage. Every day after school discuss his mood with the child. If he is offended, angry, upset, then let him put all the negative in the magic bag (saying the problems in it) and will throw it away. This technique teaches a child to designate its emotions and do not focus on them. You can sew a second magic bag, but already a bag of joy, good luck, laughter. Little surprises (candy, fruit, beautiful notebook and so on), funny jokes in it (candy, fruit, beautiful notebook and so on) every day.

Listen to good music. The fact that music is changing our emotional mood is known to everyone. Children are no exception. On the contrary, they are even more sensitive. Therefore, even if a good music sounds in the nursery. Listen to your child in her choice, it may be a classic, and songs from cartoons. The main thing is that they give the charge of a positive mood.

R. S:And just more often hug your child. Younger schoolchildren need it, like kindergartens. Mine Lask is the most magical key that helps to survive difficulties and believe in your strength! It is absolutely difficult to call a child once again without asking about the lessons, but to say that you miss. And when he comes home, sit together calmly and talk to the abstract topics.

? ", I got to the address: no longer need to read any articles, including this. I will answer right now: "No!"

It is impossible to force a child. It is possible to make it only to obey, and then not long.

The famous German psychotherapist, the founder of Gestalt therapy Fritz Perlz (Fritz Perls) argued that there are two possibilities to influence another person: to become a "dog from above" or "dog from below." "Dog from above" is power, authority, orders, threats, punishment, pressure. "Dog from below" is flattery, lies, manipulations, sabotage, blackmail, tears. And when these two "dogs" come into confrontation, the "dog from below" always wins. So, if you want a child to listen to you, the first thing to stop to force it. Stop command, read notation, shame. Here are some tips to replace these inefficient funds.

How to achieve obedience

First of all, you need to encourage and stimulate any activity of a child aimed at the right direction. Girl rust wash dishes? Be sure to allow, even if its help only hurts. Psychologists conducted surveys of schoolchildren from the fourth - eighth grades, finding out whether they make some. It turned out that the percentage of children who do not help parents are the same. But in the fourth - sixth grades many children were unhappy with the fact that they do not trust homemade! But in the seventh and eighth grades of disgruntled no longer.

The founder of Patriotic Psychology Lev Semenovich Vygotsky developed a universal diagram of the child's learning to independently perform everyday affairs. At first, the child does something together with his parents, then parents draw a clear instruction, and then child begins to act completely independently.

Suppose you want a child carefully when comes from the street. First stage: everything is done together, parents show, help. In the second stage you need to come up with and draw a hint: What, in what sequence and where to be folded. For example, this is:

Most children are readily followed by understandable and visual instructions. Gradually, a habit is formed, and external tips become unnecessary.

The following excellent reception is to turn the necessary actions in or competition. Just remove toys bored and long. Play cleaning is quite another thing.

The game is the natural need of children, in a game form they are ready to take for the most unloved things. Competition is also an excellent motivator.

Famous Children's Psychologist Julia Borisovna Hippenrater leads such an example. Parents wanted their son to charge. Bought outdoors, father made a horizontal bar in the doorway, but it was not particularly interesting to the boy, and he leaned with all the ways. Then Mom offered her son to compete, who will make more pull-ups. Take the table, hung it next to the horizontal bar. As a result, both began to play sports regularly.

A few words about widespread practices - to pay for children for home affairs ... In the long run, it does not work. Requests of the child grow, and the amount of work performed decreases. In one study, students were offered to solve the puzzle. Half of them paid for it, others - no. Those who received money were less stubborn and quickly stopped attempts. Those who acted from sports interest, spent more time. This once again confirms the rule known in psychology: external motivation (even positive) is less effective than internal.

How to prohibit

Bans are needed not only for physical security. Numerous studies have shown that in childhood he has a negative impact on personality and the fate of man. Therefore, the prohibitions must be necessarily. But it is very important not to overload the stick, because their excess is also harmful. Let's see what psychologists advise.

1. Flexibility

Julia Borisovna Hippenreiter offers to divide the entire activity of the child into four zones: green, yellow, orange and red.

  1. The green zone is what is allowed without any conditions, the fact that the child himself can choose. For example, what toys play.
  2. The yellow zone is allowed, but with the condition. For example, you can go walk if you do lessons.
  3. Orange zone - permitted only in exceptional cases. For example, you can not go to bed on time, as today is a holiday.
  4. The red zone is what it is impossible under any circumstances.

2. Sequence and consistency

If some actions are in the red zone, they can never allow the child never. It is enough to give slack once, and all: the children instantly understand that it is possible not to obey. The same applies to the yellow zone. If you did not make lessons, he must be deprived of walking. Hardness and sequence are the main allies of parents. It is just as important that the requirements and prohibitions are consistent between family members. When mom prohibits there is candy, and dad allows nothing good from this. Children quickly learn to use disagreements between adults in their own interests. As a result, neither dad, nor the mother obey will achieve.

3. Commonity

Do not require the impossible and carefully come to the difficult prohibitions. For example, preschoolers are very difficult (and some simply impossible) sit quietly longer than 20-30 minutes. To prohibit it to jump, run and shout in this situation meaningless. Another example: In three years, the child begins the period when he meets the removal of parents. How to cope with it - a separate topic, but "I will have enough to reap!" Bring only harm. Parents must have an idea of \u200b\u200bthe age characteristics of children to coordinate their banners with the possibilities of the child.

4. Right tone

Calm friendly tone is more efficient than rigor and threats. In one experiment, children started in a room with toys. The most attractive was a managed robot. The experimenter spoke to the child that he would leave and, until he was, it was impossible to play with a robot. In one case, the ban was strict, harsh, with the threats of punishment, in another, the teacher said gently, without increasing the voice. The percentage of children who broken the ban was the same. But in two weeks these children were again invited to the same room ...

This time no one forbade them to play with a robot alone. 14 of the 18 children, with whom the last time were strict, immediately took a robot as soon as the tutor went out. And most children from another group still did not play with the robot before the arrival of the teacher. Such is the difference between subordination and obedience.


stokkete / Depositphotos.com

5. Punishment

For non-compliance with the prohibitions should be punished. The most general rules are as follows:

  1. It is better to deprive a good thing than to do bad.
  2. It is impossible to punish publicly.
  3. Punishment should never humiliate.
  4. It is impossible to punish "for prevention".
  5. Of the measures of physical impact, only retention is clearly recommended when it is necessary to stop the swordless child. It is better to minimize.

6. A little disobedience

Absolutely obedient child is not the norm. And what life experience will your child get if there is all the time to follow the instructions and instructions? Sometimes it is necessary to allow the child to do something that hurts him. The collision with bad consequences is the best teacher. For example, the child reaches to the candle. If you see this and are confident that they are controlling the situation (there are no flammable items nearby), let him touch the flame. It will save you from verbal explanations, why you can not play with fire. Naturally, it should be adequately evaluated. Allow the child to put your fingers into the outlet - a crime.

Not fulfilling the instructions of adults, disturbing locked, children always try to achieve something or avoid. For example, to achieve attention to yourself or avoid a traumatic situation. The most important and most difficult task of parents is to understand what is behind disobedience. And for this child you have to listen, you need to talk to him. Unfortunately, magic sticks and unicorns do not exist. It is impossible to read the article on the lifehaker and solve all the problems in relationships with. But you can at least try.

"Soon in all the apartments of the country: the lessons (with sin in half) were made, the father of hoarse, the daughter of Oglochla, the neighbors everyone learned, the cat retold", "oddly enough, I still see this anecdote in the news feeds.

And if you remember that the middle of August is already on the street, it becomes not laughing. After all, not only inexperienced parents, but also moms with experience often sincerely do not understand: Well, how to make a child study?

So, with you again Sasha Bogdanova! I propose a topic for the agenda. Ostly, conflict, patient - but the necessary parents as high school students and women's children.

"Talented, but such a loaf!", - Mama is spread by the mother's hands. "The persuasions do not act on it - you have to scream, deprive pocket money and walks. It seems to be for the mind. "

How long? Of course, everyone wants his son or daughter to graduate from school with honors, they entered the prestigious university, found a highly paid job ... "Look at yourself, dude! If you get such estimates in your fifth grade, what will happen next? "

And this will be what. Compare how child hears your words:

  • "My son grows as an idiot" - "I am not suitable for anything"
  • "With such studies you will sweep the yards!" - "My future is unpromising"
  • "In our family, everyone received a higher education. With your efforts, the maximum in PTU will do "-" I disgraving the family, I'm not a place among them "
  • "Troika? Two weeks without internet! " - "I am not interested in them, they are waiting for me only positive marks"

I am already silent about when dad is taken behind the belt. If it is possible in this way to get a diligent excellent manner, it is certainly with the luggage of complexes, fears and disgust for learning (hereinafter - and work).

What do you think such a person will achieve in life?

And the meaning to learn?

Funny, but even many adults cannot convincingly answer this question. The average child will not be difficult in the fluff and dust break the parent arguments.

Nevertheless, what still lies behind these words?

  • Feeling injustice

Popularity is that girl with a new smartphone. Good marks and place in the Academy - rich in advance. Inequality is present even in junior grades - keep in mind that children will react very acute.

  • No critics
  • "Comfort zone"

To strive, a person should experience in something lack. If he has absolutely everything, it can provoke stagnation in affairs and interests. This rule concerns each (and not only students).

  • Grass

Take a look at the state of a teenager: perhaps the reason for failure to lick in bad relationships with classmates or teachers. If necessary, talk to the class teacher or consult a psychologist.

  • Over light / heavy program

Maybe he yawns in the lessons? Or, on the contrary, rolls eyes from talked homework? It makes sense to change the educational institution - so you will save nerves and yourself, and Chad.

Whip or gingerbread?

Do I need to force schoolchildren to learn? Self-taking care of the patribution or risk a couple-two "fives"?

But, applying the hard methods of our grandparents, we can get confused:

  1. on the one hand, do not deprive the child of childhood?
  2. on the other hand - how in time and on the root, stop the succity and take the situation under control?

Alas, it is the easiest way to lose contact. I offer a more efficient way - stimulating interest in subjects.

Is it possible to study with pleasure? In fact, everything is simple!

  • Set the communication

The first and most important rule. If there is no contact with the teenager, what can we say about the agreement? In this difficult age, he needs a little from us - support and understanding.

  • Open his tutorial

And even better - try to do at least one exercise from your homework. Feel free to do lessons together; So you will fill in the "gaps" much fill and give interest in the subject.

This can be achieved much more than shouts and insults.

  • Let's notify not a person, but actions

The student will quickly understand that it all depends on it, which means it is entitled to direct the situation in the direction necessary for him. It does not like the sentences like "you are stupid" (why do I need to develop, if it is useless?) Or "you are very smart" (why, because I am so well done).

  • Give up false motivation

"For whom do you study?" - "For you!". Unfortunately, in many modern Russian families, this is the only stimulus.

Your task is to settle his curiosity, even if it costs the purchase of a microscope. Or make sure that children apply their knowledge in a game form.

  • Creative approach to the process

You can make together layouts, to conduct experiences (for these purposes it is better to buy a special book), grow crystals ... and you can learn biology on fishing. As you can see, it is not necessary to sit at the encyclopedias.

I, by the way, "I got acquainted" with Catherine Ces, however, the reason for the acquaintance was on our other topic, namely, how to help the child to survive the divorce of the parents. " Yes, I had to "contact".

But in addition to me, I found an interesting training from her " how to teach a child to learn"And you know ... Passing the material I need, I have no doubt that this one will be the same useful! TC try, tell me later)

As an afterword

It's no secret that education affects the entire further life. But it is much more important to maintain trust relationships with a native person, try to understand, and not throw indignations.

Remember the proverb: it is better to get a blue diploma with a red face than the opposite? Perhaps a teenager will not become the second Einstein, will not accumulate an impressive state, will not go to Moscow State University. But still there are things upside down external well-being.

And how do you solve the problem: Do you make tasks? I think my note will be useful to those who are not the first time comes on the rake, acting with tough methods.

Waiting for your opinion - how did you teach your children to study? And, of course, do not forget to subscribe to my blog.

And again the competition

Today it will also be a rebus. Who is not aware, I spend now the contest "Catch the riddle", who first guess, that prod) everything is simple ...

Mystery number 6.

Hint: Just it came to mind) The rebus is very light, the childish is easy and in the tips does not need! Good luck, friends! 😉

This is all today, see you in new articles!

Always with you, Sasha Bogdanova

It is no secret that many children do not want to learn. Justice should be noted that the school today provides only "educational services", which means that now no one will be engaged with lagging schoolchildren free after classes, as in Soviet times. The extensions, where the teachers helped the children to do lessons, they also ringed in the fly. How to be?

For the success of the student at all times answers the indestructible "Triad": teachers, parents of the child and he himself. Moreover, it is very important from the first class to instill a son or daughter responsible for independent training, that is, your child should be able to perform training tasks, including alone, without a close supervision of Pope and Mom. And this is the most difficult. After all, today so much distracting factors!

Modern gadgets and messengers almost canceled live communication. The game consoles were replaced by children running in the yard and, in contrast to the game in football and walking through the park, gave the illusion that it is possible to become cool quickly and without cost. And do not understand the boys and girls that all this is only the kidnappers of their time, which they so important to spend on training.

And if you add the fact that modern parents disappear at work to make money, the picture becomes completely insane.

But everything is not so sad. Mom and dad are still unbreakable authorities for their child, and they should always know how to influence the child.

Take an example from idol

Tell the child how many of his idol studied in order to become successful

Photo: © RIA Novosti / Konstantin Chalabov

Find out who is an example for your child. Maybe this is your relative - shining science or brave military, which has served to high ranks? Or does your impersonal have an idol from the world of politics or show business? Well, if this is not a football player, with difficulty finished school, and a highly educated person like Bill Gates or Vladimir Putin. Tell the child as a lot of his idol studied in order to become a successful person. Choo loves to read? Excellent. Let it take an example from the same Gatsby, who was still in childhood compiled a detailed day schedule, clearly defining the path that brought him as a result to great opportunities.

Make together with his son and daughter his individual routine of the day, week, year. For example, the schedule on weekdays should include a clock in which the child makes homework, as well as hours of visits to circles and sections. Be sure to leave in the daily schedule time for games and "Lurence".

Next, separately develop a plan for the quarterly achievements of the child. What does he want to achieve in three or four months? Perhaps to be in the first row in your dance studio? Find out why so far he is not there. Perhaps he has extra weight. Come up together how to reset it. Maybe refuse flour and sweet? The case will go much faster if you, parents, will join the "thin" marathon.

Illustrate clearly the achievements of the child. This may be a poster with bright speaking photos in the format "was - it became." Let your child rejoice that he, who a few months ago hesitated to go to the board, was given gratitude for the best report. Hang the wall award.

Fix any achievements in the formation of a child, albeit additionally. The same sports progress will inspire him to accomplish the feats in all educational areas.

You see, because it is not terrible that the child is poorly learning, "the teacher argues with the experience of Daria Pleshkov. - It is terrible what falls his confidence in herself, and this will definitely be eager in all areas of human life.

No "home"? No gadget

If the child independently and successfully solved his homework, let him play

Here you will need steel nerves. But, holding the case, do not let the slack. Gadget is not something that constantly should be in the hands of a child. Encourage it as follows: if Choot independently and successfully solved his homework, let him play on the console. No "houses" - no toys. Point.

"Pay" whether for the tops? This is a controversial way, but someone successfully implements it in his family.

I myself became an excellent student thanks to such a system, the Konstantin Kochetkov is divided, now succeeding web designer. - Moreover, first, I was attracted by the "buns", which could be purchased to the funds earned in this way, then the achievement of noticeable success in study turned into a real mental excitement. Thanks to good marks, my self-esteem has grown noticeably, and I no longer wanted to drop it at the same place.

Maybe a child is a humanitarian and nourishes disgust to the exact sciences, but succeeds in the rest? What to do in this case? Here on the surface two options: to find him a strong teacher (perhaps a tutor), with whom the schoolchild has a relationship of mutual human sympathy. The second option is to leave everything as it is if the child shows significant successes (and diligence, which is important) in another area. In the end, not to all be honors.

Parents are friends

Create more often with the class teacher, ask about the most minor trifles of school life of the child

Photo: © RIA Novosti / Alexey Filippov

The worst thing is if the child in principle is experiencing a negative school as a whole. If he does not want to go there if he is spinning at all lessons and categorically refuses to perform homework without you - this is a real problem that requires a solution.

Create more often with a cool leader, ask about the most minor trifles of school life of the child himself. Show your child psychologist - perhaps it will not work out one such meeting, and this does not need to be afraid or ashamed.

And what if the reason for the aversion of a boy or girl to school lies in such things that you do not even guess. Maybe the child tease classmates for non-mode clothing or speech defect. Or maybe he is selected by high school students, and you do not know. Often about such things a teenager can only tell a unconscious person who is just a psychologist.

Calm in the family

The child must firmly know that the family is a bastion in which he always stays in love and security

Parents will not hurt to arrange a revision and herself. You yourself were an exemplary student? Attentive, purposeful? Not? Do not you think that son or daughter know perfectly well about this from the members of your family? Alas that we will lay, then you will get married, no one has canceled genes yet.

Well, finally, what are the relationships in your family? Are you a team? Or everyone for himself? Do you think it does not matter and does not affect the performance of your children? Haha. They, like a sponge, absorb all emotions. And no matter how hurts you to admit to this, but if the child feels cold and the tension between the most close people to him, he cannot learn well. His head all the time is busy, whether the mother will come in a good mood today, whether dad will not scold.

The responsibility of the parent is primarily to provide a child with peace of mind. The child must firmly know that the family is a bastion in which he always stays in love and security. Where family members support each other, no matter what. And help grow morally, mentally and spiritually.