A month old baby cries all day. If the baby cries for no reason - Alevtina Lugovskaya. During feeding

Lyudmila Sergeevna Sokolova

Reading time: 6 minutes

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Article last updated: 04/29/2019

From the moment a baby is born to the moment he or she develops speech, crying is the primary mode of communication. Only in this way can he show what he wants, complain that something is bothering him, something is hindering him. It happens that the baby cries not because of discomfort, but because of whims, but if crying is accompanied by a lack of sleep, then parents should take it very seriously and identify why the child is worried as soon as possible.

Features of baby crying

The first cry of a baby is his cry immediately after birth. It is a protest of separation from the mother. According to the strength of this cry, doctors draw conclusions about the viability of the child, the state of his health. A newborn cries often, but over time, he begins to cry less often, and the mother can already understand what exactly the baby requires.

It is important to know that crying is harmful to the baby! It does not train the lungs and does not temper the character, but, on the contrary, loosens the nervous system and deprives the confidence in the safety and friendliness of the surrounding world. Prolonged crying can lead to the formation of an umbilical hernia.

Older babies may cry because of whims, but this does not apply to monthly babies. The crying of a baby who is only a month old is a reaction to a real problem. Therefore, you need to respond to it immediately - take the baby in your arms, swing, soothe.

Why is the baby crying and not sleeping?

A month old baby may not sleep well and cry constantly due to hunger. Even if he has eaten recently, there is a possibility that he did not eat enough. This happens when the baby is not properly attached to the breast. He takes only the nipple into his mouth, without a halo, the milk comes in badly, he gets tired and goes to sleep hungry. Hungry crying sounds demanding and intermittent.

Even if the child is full, he could remain unsatisfied with the sucking reflex. If the baby is breastfed, then he himself tries to satisfy this reflex, often and for a long time lying at the mother's breast. Formula-fed babies need nipples.

Parents of artificial children should carefully monitor the amount of food eaten by the child. The formula from the bottle starts to flow immediately and flows out quickly (not like milk from the breast), so the baby quickly fills up, but continues to suck the formula to satisfy the sucking reflex and overeat as a result. From overeating after eating, the stomach can hurt, sleep is disturbed.

Why does a one month old baby cry after feeding? The digestive system of the baby is not yet strong, it is in the phase of development and adaptation to the conditions of the surrounding world. Indigestion can be caused by foods consumed by a nursing mother. Due to the mother's abuse of gas-producing foods (cow's milk, legumes, vegetables and fruits rich in fiber) or as a result of the baby swallowing air during feeding, bloating occurs. It becomes hard, painful sensations appear. Many babies suffer from colic, which begins at the age of one month and ends after 3 months. Some have it earlier, some have it later, but for all colic completely stops by six months - the beginning of the period of introducing complementary foods.

The swallowing of a large amount of air by the baby during feeding occurs in cases where it is incorrectly applied to the breast. This happens because of the uncomfortable posture of feeding. Artificial babies swallow air if there is too big a hole in the nipple of the bottle. After feeding, you need to keep the baby in a “column”. By the way, an improperly selected mixture can also cause colic, as, in fact, breast milk, if the child has intolerance to it.

Colic can be a sign of serious diseases of the stomach or intestines (malformations of the gastrointestinal tract, enterocolitis, fermentopathy, dysbacteriosis).

With colic, the child abruptly and piercingly begins to cry, clenching his fists, his face turns red, his tummy becomes hard, he begins to twist his legs (either press them to his stomach, then completely straighten them). To make the gases come out faster, you can put a warm heating pad or an ironed diaper on the tummy. You can take a flax seed, sew it into fabric, making a small pillow. It needs to be ironed on both sides and applied to the sore tummy. Flaxseed keeps you warm longer than just plain fabric.

When the baby is sick, he does not sleep and constantly cries. It could be a cold. Then the baby will have symptoms such as fever and nasal congestion, cough. A month old baby can catch a gastrointestinal infection. In this case, the sick baby may experience diarrhea, vomiting.

Sleep disturbance and the occurrence of painful sensations accompanied by crying are observed with increased intracranial pressure.

The baby suffers and does not sleep all day during teething. In a month, such cases are rare, but still happen.

In order for the child to sleep well, it is necessary to constantly ensure that it is clean and dry. Some children do not react to a wet, filled diaper, while others cannot sleep peacefully in such a situation.

Parents should not choose a brand of diaper based only on advertising or advice from friends. This hygiene item should be selected individually for the baby. It’s best to try several brands to find the perfect diaper—one that absorbs well, doesn’t sting, doesn’t rub, doesn’t press, doesn’t leak liquid, doesn’t cause irritation or diaper rash. With discomfort from wet diapers, the baby cries persistently and plaintively.

A one-month-old baby does not sleep and cries due to discomfort from uncomfortable baby clothes (with seams inside or restricting movement), loud noises, bright lights, stuffiness or cold.

If the child sneezes, actively moves his legs and arms, then he is cold, but if his face turns red, he starts to sweat, it means he is hot. Parents can exclude the occurrence of most of these negative factors in advance. They must constantly maintain the required temperature (up to 22 degrees) and humidity (at least 60%) in the baby’s room, ventilate and wash the room every day, dim the light (with thick curtains) before going to bed, try not to create sources of loud and harsh noise. Of course, it is not possible to foresee everything in advance, so the regular noise of a drill or hammer from a neighboring apartment in which repairs have been started can become a problem.

If a monthly baby does not sleep, then the reason for this may be a feeling of loneliness, defenselessness. The baby needs to constantly feel the maternal warmth, smell, hear his native voice.

In this article:

The most common problem that new parents face is the constant crying of a newborn baby at the age of 1 or 2 months. The child is very small and he still cannot express his feelings and needs for anything in words. Maybe something hurts him? Or does he just want to eat? How to learn to determine why a newborn is crying? Why does a 1-2 month old baby cry in his sleep? How to calm him down, and is it worth it to see a doctor about this?

Reasons for crying

In fact, there are a lot of reasons why newborn babies cry a lot. The most common of them are:

• hunger;
• colic;
• climatic conditions in which the child is located.

Basically, the baby cries because of the hunger he is experiencing. Today, most inexperienced young mothers adhere to a strict feeding schedule, which, as they think, has a beneficial effect on the digestive system. Perhaps they were told about this at and when they were discharged from the hospital. Yes, perhaps it is. But the problem is that the ventricle of a newborn is very small and, accordingly, he eats little. And sometimes he does not have enough of the amount of milk that he consumed during feeding in order to wait for the next “portion”.

Therefore, it is extremely important to feed the child not on time, but on demand. If a newborn baby cries, it is very easy to check whether he wants to eat or not. It is enough to attach a bent little finger to the corner of his mouth. If he starts to turn his head towards the finger and open his mouth as if he wants to grab onto it, then the baby is hungry. It's time to calm him down and attach him to the chest. A child of 1 month of life will eat, quickly fall asleep in his mother's arms, and hunger will not disturb him in his sleep for the next couple of hours.

Colic is the second reason why a baby cries. His digestive system has just begun to master its "new role". As a rule, colic bothers the baby for 1, 2 and 3 months of his life, in some cases they can last up to 6 months. If a baby who is 1 or 2 months old is constantly crying, know that this may be the whole problem.

Determining the crying of a child who is bothered by colic is just as easy. It is impossible to confuse it with any other. The child screams very strongly, jerks its legs and literally chokes from crying. The face becomes red, almost to blue. In this case, in order to calm the crying baby, it is necessary to give the baby a massage and give medicine (today there are a huge number of medications that help relieve the newborn from colic), or give him dill water.

Another reason why a baby cries is the climatic conditions in which it is located. Little babies sometimes cry because they can't stand extreme heat or cold. Each child is individual, so it is necessary to create exactly those climatic conditions under which your baby will feel comfortable.

Determine whether the baby is hot or cold, the following method will help:

• take the child by the hand;
• put your fingers on your wrist;
• if the wrist is cold, then the baby is cold, it needs to be wrapped up more tightly, if it is hot or damp, it is hot, the child needs to be undressed.

Another reason why a baby cries is the negligence of parents who are simply too lazy to change the baby's diaper once again. An adult feels uncomfortable in wet clothes, and a baby whose diaper is full feels discomfort. Check frequently to see if the baby has a bowel movement. If an "accident" occurs, deal with it immediately to reassure your little one. By the way, for the same reason, the child may experience irritation in the inguinal region and in the folds, which can cause the baby not only discomfort, but severe pain and itching. If there is redness in the groin, try to minimize the use of diapers and treat the baby's skin with special creams more often.

Also, the cause of crying can be postpartum complications. Often, young mothers during childbirth cannot direct their forces in the right direction, that is, when they try, they begin to pout, but not there (in the face), due to which the time for the baby to pass through the birth canal has increased. As a rule, at this moment, in most cases, the child develops anemia (lack of oxygen), which negatively affects his nervous system. Because of this, a newborn can sleep poorly, shudder at every rustle in a dream, and constantly scream. In this case, it is necessary to contact a neurologist who will conduct a thorough examination of the baby and prescribe appropriate treatment. After completing the medication course, the baby's nervous system will improve, it will be easier to calm him down and crying will not disturb parents so often.

Very often, parents are faced with such a problem when a newborn baby cries with every urination and begins to sound the alarm. In fact, there is nothing terrible here, this is the usual fear of the child of what is happening. He cannot control the process itself, gets scared when he starts to write, as a result of which he starts crying. But still, you need to consult a doctor and take urine tests. Because sometimes there are cases when a baby cries due to pain during urination, which may be associated with:

• with infectious diseases of the urinary system;
• or with an incorrect location of the foreskin.

Pain during urination may also indicate a high concentration of urine, which, passing through the urinary canal, causes irritation and burning.

When a baby cries and has a frequent fever (the norm for a newborn is 37.2 C), you need to urgently go to the doctor. Perhaps the reason lies in an infectious disease that requires urgent treatment.

But our children do not always cry because of hunger or pain. Sometimes they just need the presence of their mother nearby. Before birth, the child was one with her, and now it is very difficult for him to get used to a new life. The baby needs the presence of a mother nearby and feel her warmth and care. Therefore, do not be afraid to spoil the child, take him more often in your arms, apply more often to your chest, put him to sleep in your arms to calm him down, talk to him. This will help the baby calm down and fall asleep quickly. Your care and warmth will definitely return to you in the future!

Why does a newborn cry in his sleep?

If the baby constantly cries in a dream, then it is worth first of all to inspect the baby's sleeping place. Perhaps something is preventing him from sleeping, for example, a sheet is curled under him or he lies on a nipple.

Also, the causes of crying in a dream can be night colic, which prevent the baby from sleeping, teething (in some children, teeth begin to erupt at 3.5 - 4 months), or the banal absence of a mother nearby.

If a child constantly cries in his sleep for 1-2 months, but nothing bothers him, maybe you should think about co-sleeping? The baby will feel calm next to his mother, especially since he can always eat without forcing you to get up if he is breastfeeding.

How to calm a crying baby?

First you need to find out why the baby is crying, and only after that begin to calm him down. If the reason for crying is hunger, feed him, even though it has not even been 2 hours since the last feeding.
If colic is the cause, give the child medicine and massage. And it is done like this:

• put the child on the bed;
• put your hand on his stomach, the palm should completely touch the stomach;
• mentally draw a horseshoe on his stomach, the ends of which are directed downwards;
• with smooth hand movements, follow the path of the horseshoe clockwise.

If this massage did not help your baby, then you can use another massage. However, it can be performed only from 1 month:

• put the child on the bed;
• bend both legs at the knees so that they touch the stomach;
• With smooth movements, take the child's legs first to one side, then to the other. The legs should be tightly pressed to each other and to the stomach.

If these methods do not help, you can use the gas outlet tube. However, you should not abuse it, since the body can get used to the mechanical method of getting rid of gases and then it will be difficult to establish this process.

If a baby who is 1 or 2 months old is crying, and you have already tried everything possible, but nothing helps, it may not be colic. Try putting a heating pad on your baby's tummy, make sure it's not too hot! Give your child dill water or fennel tea.

Carry the child in your arms, press him with your stomach to you. Sometimes both gentle swaying and “dancing” can calm a crying baby. Some children find relief in waltzing movements, others in the style of a march. Try holding your baby in various positions - vertically, horizontally, belly down. Perhaps you will find exactly the position in which the baby will feel relieved.

But remember that the reason for the crying of a child in a month can be not only in colic or climatic conditions. If the child is restless and cries often, it is best to take him to the doctor. At the appointment with a specialist, you can find out why your baby is crying and make sure that there are no or presence of any diseases.

Useful video about the reasons for crying a newborn

Your baby cries a lot and you see no reason for it. Believe me, this does not happen. There is always a reason for tears. About why the baby can cry, how to find out the reason, how to prevent tearfulness, you will learn from the wonderful book by the practicing child psychiatrist Alevtina Lugovskaya. Using her advice and recommendations, you will not only change the character of the baby, but also learn how to become both a mother and a true friend to him.

Chapter 1

Let's start, dear parents, let's figure out what baby crying is and how it can be caused. It is important to find out this, because only by knowing the roots of tears, you can eliminate both. And I also want to say that parents think wrongly, who, not understanding why the child sheds endless tears, thereby consider crying unreasonable. Believe me, this does not happen.

Crying is a signal that reflexively occurs in infants due to hunger, thirst, the desire to sleep and the urge to natural remedies. Subsequently, crying signals any unpleasant, unbearable feeling, reaching the degree of affect: acute anxiety and fear, sadness and longing, irritation and excitement.

The various functions of crying - whim (hysteria), protest, request, demand, complaint (offense), cry-signal, cry-detente - make up a complex psychological structure, that is, a kind of language.

For extraneous hearing, children's crying is an unpleasant irritant. Mom always knows how to catch notes in him that indicate what her baby wants. If adults try to use any means to stop a child's crying, they risk not only increasing the distance between themselves and him, but also erecting a real wall of indifference and misunderstanding.

However, there are children who cry clearly more than others. They shed tears for every reason: sympathizing with their favorite characters in a fairy tale, or seeing a dead butterfly, hearing screams and loud voices, experiencing physical pain, or coming into conflict with someone.

Crying is a strong mental experience, a kind of emotional shake-up that occurs against the background of previous tension, excitement or inhibition.

It can be the result of a discharge of tension, like an overflowing thundercloud from which rain falls. The relief experienced after crying to some extent contributes to an improvement in mood, thus representing a means of regulating emotional tone.

Sometimes crying speaks of limiting vital interests and needs that the child cannot reconcile with, of humiliation of his self-esteem, insult and resentment. Often it arises as a way to attract the attention of parents, as a kind of request for help, to intervene, to resolve this or that exciting problem. In emotionally indifferent parents, the crying of the baby in this case reaches the gradation of a cry of despair, as if urging them to be more responsive to him. He thus complains about the one who offended him, about feeling unwell, pain, inability to realize his desires.

Many parents complain about the restless behavior of their children: whims, irritability, tears over every trifle, turning into tantrums when the child falls to the floor, begins to beat his legs or arms. We must try to find out the cause of this behavior and try to eliminate it.

Especially often the mother is alarmed by the inexplicable cry of an infant. In such cases, if you are convinced that there is no visible cause for concern, and the doctor, having examined him, concluded that he is healthy, you should not run up to him at his every cry, pick him up and please him, feed him at the wrong time, just to calm him down . Otherwise, the baby will get used to the fact that with a cry he can achieve everything he wants. Wrong techniques will calm him only for a short time.

To begin with, crying in the first years of his life, the baby expresses natural needs, that is, he wants to eat, drink, relieve himself, or he is uncomfortable in wet clothes. The child does not yet know how to speak and expresses all his desires through crying, thus attracting the attention of his parents.

Later, when the baby learns to pronounce his first words and, it would seem, should already express his desires with them, he still cries and is naughty if he wants something. This happens reflexively, because the subconscious contains information about this way of fulfilling desires.

Nervous irritability often arises in him if he relentlessly demands the impossible. Sometimes he doesn’t need this object at all, he’s just used to screaming and crying to get his way.

It is also possible that at an early age a child is taught to be calm and cheerful only in the presence of adults. He feels comfortable only when someone is nearby, they pay attention to him. And this is undesirable, as it is fraught with unpleasant consequences.

If the baby does not find something to do and feels the need for direct contact with parents, he can express his desire to attract the attention of adults, tears, whimpers, complaints of various misfortunes and thus achieve his goal. If he is very small, they will take him in his arms and try to calm him down, that is, they will show some kind of attention.

Communication means a lot to a child. Those parents who pay enough attention to this are doing the right thing. But you should not indulge and fulfill all whims: give everything that you ask, constantly take it in your arms and relentlessly be around, discarding all business and worries.

Around the sixth week of life, often at the onset of evening, the baby begins to cry, writhe, show signs of illness. At the same time, he is clean, he has drunk enough water, he is not hot ... This state is called “evening anxiety”. Don't be scared. This often happens, but passes, as it corresponds to a phase of restless awakening, which disappears by the third month of life. He has no other way to discharge the tension accumulated during the day, and he discharges in this way. Consider that these are the difficulties of adapting the newborn to the rhythms of day and night.

When the baby starts teething, he becomes very irritable and whiny. Teeth are a very painful process: the gums swell, itch and hurt, saliva runs strongly, his temperature rises.

Crying can also be the result of an emotional disorder, when the baby is afraid or unable to express his feelings and desires aloud. This is possible when in contact with strangers, unfamiliar people. Often on the street or in transport we hear such expressions: “Stop squealing, otherwise I’ll give you to my uncle!” or “If you kick your aunt with her legs, she will take you with her!”

Usually such threats give a negative result. But there are children with a very sensitive and vulnerable psyche, such warnings make a very strong impression on them, cause fear. And the words “Come on, come on, I’ll take her to me!” can cause panic horror at the prospect of spending your whole life in the company of strangers. After all, the baby takes everything said at face value.

Such threats develop in children a persistent rejection of strangers, and in the future, after all, they feel free and at ease only in a familiar environment, in the circle of relatives and relatives.

If the baby is cold or hot, and he does not know how to talk about it, he will naturally begin to cry. He also expresses his emotions when he recovers in his pants. Of course, who likes to walk around in wet clothes! And the kid calls with a loud cry to correct annoying misunderstandings.

Irritability, tears, and moodiness are sometimes the result of experience overload when you take him shopping, visiting, walking in the park, going to the zoo, or riding on carousels, where there are a lot of people and noise. Toddlers react differently to noises and large crowds of people: some quickly get used to it, while others are very afraid and may even get sick as a result.

The baby does not want to go to bed, so he starts to act up and cry. All your tenderness may not be enough if the child does not want to go to bed, his crying fills all corners of the house. It will take a lot of patience to resolve this situation. Such crying should be treated as a process of gradual re-education, like weaning from a bad habit.

Children, like adults, also have dreams. But since the child cannot yet find an explanation for many objects and phenomena, they naturally frighten him. As you know, we most often have dreams related to previous events. And if he dreamed of something unfamiliar, incomprehensible, this causes his fear and - as a result - tears. In other words, the kid had a nightmare.

He can burst into tears not only because of a terrible dream. There are a lot of things in the world that the child does not yet know and cannot explain, hence the strong fear, and the baby begins to cry up to hysteria and painful spasms.

When a child falls ill and cannot explain what hurts him, he begins to cry from pain, act up, refuse to eat, and sleep restlessly.

In the first years of his life, he is under the constant supervision of a local doctor. It is very important that he not be afraid of his visit. Usually, children associate a white coat with pain, injections, an unpleasant sensation when they listen to it or look at the neck, and they start crying, even hysterically, they resist, fight, do not allow the doctor to do an examination, push his hands away.

Crying is a natural reaction if the baby falls or hits. Of course he hurts. Children generally take their failures very seriously. Even if he hit slightly, he will still make a whole tragedy out of it, because it is important for him to be paid attention to, sympathize with and regret.

Sometimes children do not want to wear what their parents offer them - and again whims, tears and other actions up to throwing clothes.

Not all children quickly get used to the kindergarten. Sometimes it takes a lot of effort and patience to adapt to a new environment and get used to other kids. After all, the child considered it natural that his mother should always be with him. Getting into an unfamiliar environment and losing sight of his parents, the baby gets scared and starts looking for them, expressing his displeasure by crying.

He may cry if other children hurt him. For example, they pushed him, didn’t share a toy, took away a book with interesting pictures…

By crying, he expresses dissatisfaction when something does not work out for him. For example, a child tried to put on socks on his own, but unsuccessfully. The sock turns over, the leg does not want to get into it. The baby begins to get nervous and cry, as if attracting the attention of adults to help him.

In the early years, the kids sweat a lot, recovering in diapers or sliders. All this negatively affects the condition of their skin. Therefore, it is very important to bathe them regularly. But not everyone loves water procedures and express their dissatisfaction with screams and crying, they arrange “concerts”, attracting the attention of not only relatives and friends, but even neighbors who listen in bewilderment to loud screams behind the wall and painfully wonder what they are doing with child, since he cries so hysterically.

Tears can be the result of punishment. They generally greatly affect the mental development of the child. He can withdraw, become embittered, because he sees the connection between his behavior and punishment, evaluating it only as violence on the part of adults.

Punishment for no reason, when he is not at all guilty, seems especially offensive to the baby. For example, on a walk someone pushed him into the mud, naturally, he got dirty, got scared and burst into tears. Arriving home, he seeks sympathy from his mother, and she starts yelling at him, because she will have to do the laundry again. She did not understand the situation, did not ask him about how it happened. As a result, the child, crying and offended, stands in the corner, serving his sentence.

A crying child, being in a state of passion, does not perceive comments, advice, orders well, which means that it is useless to educate while crying. It is unacceptable to punish him who is crying, since he can easily forget what he was punished for, and the very state of crying is inherently a punishment for him.

There is a popular belief that children's tears are easy to dry. Indeed, the duration of the emotional state in children under five years of age is relatively short, but the strength of emotions is not inferior, and sometimes even exceeds a similar state in adults.

The grief of a child over the loss of a beloved kitten is no less great than the grief of an adult who has lost a loved one. And it is simply impossible to dismiss him in such a situation, even if he forgets about it in two weeks. And the fear of being abandoned in the locker room of the kindergarten? It seems to adults that 15 minutes will not change anything, and they are wrong.

Experiences and emotions require a lot of power, so do not oversaturate the baby's day with a set of events, even if they are pleasant ones. This can cause unexpected vomiting, moodiness, tearfulness, and sleep disturbance.

Chapter 2. What should parents do?

You can’t ignore the crying of a son or daughter at all. This can cause irreparable damage to trust in adults. When crying is clearly hysterical, the best thing is not to reinforce it with increased attention, but to provide an opportunity for the release of nervous tension. In other cases, crying should be dealt with, which is possible only with confidential contact and a guarantee of the absence of punishment.

First of all, the baby cries, expressing natural needs. This is very easy to find out by offering him food or drink. He cries that he has a wet diaper or clothes. Check and change them. An older child, perhaps, is asking for a potty. Acting in such a situation is as easy as shelling pears: put him on the potty and stay with him, distract him with a conversation or show him a toy.

He may burst into tears if he is hot or, conversely, cold. You will determine this by the condition of his skin: the skin will be wet, sweaty if he is hot, and cool, with pimples (goose bumps) if the baby is cold. Finding out the cause, try to eliminate it. In general, it is very undesirable for kids to overheat, it is more terrible for them than the cold. Do not make a sissy out of it, do not wrap it up, turning it into cabbage, this will quickly lead to diseases.

Tearfulness and whims are most often a consequence of the disease. He may scream because his tummy hurts, there is no stool for more than the allotted time. To eliminate discomfort, use a light massage of the abdomen. Massage is performed clockwise, with stroking movements. Keep your hands warm, use baby cream to better glide your hands over his body.

If there is no effect, remove the gases. To do this, put the baby on the left side and bend his legs, pressing them to the tummy. You can use another method - insert a gas outlet tube. The last resort, if there is no positive result, is an enema. Put the baby on his left side and make an enema with warm boiled water.

In the event of a serious illness, in no case do not self-medicate, because you do not know what the child is sick with. Call the local doctor at home. The first symptoms of the disease, as a rule, are lethargy, drowsiness, refusal to eat. Pay attention to the condition of the skin, look at the neck, check the stool. Be sure to measure your body temperature.

As you know, when a child is sick, his appetite decreases, so do not feed him through force, do not give food as much as possible. Another important point: even if the baby is sick, do not force him to stay in bed. Since the constant stay in bed is accompanied by crying due to the unwillingness to lie down, know that the baby will spend no less energy on tears than on walking.

Dress it according to the temperature regime, but in no case half the wardrobe - overheating is very dangerous for children, especially when they are sick.

It often happens that even after recovery, a nervous and tearful state persists. Be patient. Do not answer him with your irritation and screams, but first of all, take care of strict observance of the established regimen in accordance with the condition and age of the child: put him to bed on time, feed him properly and often be in the fresh air. Give your child as much care and affection as possible, because even an adult, when sick, requires increased attention. Try to distract him from the consequences that the disease has led to (weakness, imbalance), do not break the usual regimen, this can only do harm.

The child cries, is naughty, does not want to go to the doctor. First of all, you need to talk to him, explain why you are going to the clinic and how this visit will go. The relationship between the child and the doctor is formed through the parents, because it is they who bring him to the appointment, explain the reason for the visit, the symptoms of the disease. Therefore, it is very important to explain to him that there is nothing terrible in such a visit, that he will not be hurt there. In no case should you scare a child with injections and a hospital. Imagine that you can instill fear and dislike for people in white coats in a baby for life.

The child is naughty, cries, does not want to go to bed. Of course, because from the first days of his life he got used to your constant presence, does not want to part, leave toys and go to bed. He needs you to be around for a while. Sit on the edge of the bed, tell him some kind story, fairy tale, read a book or just look at pictures with him. You can quietly sing a song or just talk about the past day.

This will allow the baby to calmly end his day. Ask him about what interesting happened, share with him your affairs, but do it in a way that he understands. His favorite toy should be nearby so that he can reach it. After all, children love to sleep with toys. At this moment, you should give the baby maximum attention and affection, as this is very important for him and for you and helps to strengthen your relationship.

Sometimes the baby, on the contrary, is naughty because he wants to sleep, but does not fall asleep. Lull him, caress him, give him a relaxing massage. Stay with him for a while, try to set him up for sleep.

To teach your baby to voluntarily go to bed, the first step is to calm him down. Let him cry for a few minutes, then come and pet him. Gradually increase the time gap before coming to him when he starts to cry. Over time, he will realize that he was not abandoned when he sleeps, loving parents are nearby. You will let him know that you love him, that you are always with him. So he will calm down, get used to it and fall asleep without whims.

If the baby refuses to eat, do not force-feed him, do not yell at him. Stock up on patience. Say what you need to eat to grow up big and healthy, like dad; put a toy on the table and “feed” it, alternating - one spoon for the doll, the other for him. There is another well-known way - this is to eat a spoon for each of the family members: for dad, for mom, for grandmother ...

Your baby does not like and does not want to bathe. What to do in such a situation? First of all, try to explain to him why this is being done. Explain the importance of cleanliness of the body. Remember the fairy tale "Moydodyr" about a boy from whom all his clothes ran away because he was dirty. Remind him how he has been sick lately and try to convince him that if he bathes he will never get sick.

Use a variety of toys that can be washed. Now there are many clockwork waterfowl toys that can distract him when bathing. Blow bubbles together. The most important thing is that you should be nearby, in no case do not leave the baby alone in the bathroom, because he can not only choke, but also be very scared of water.

Sometimes the reluctance to bathe is due to the ingress of soap or shampoo into the eyes. He still feels uncomfortable, so he starts crying. Use special detergents for children that will not cause irritation if it gets into your eyes.

The kid is stubborn and does not want to get dressed, starts to get nervous, cry, scatter clothes. Find out why he protests. Maybe he wants to wear his favorite thing, let him, if possible, make his choice. Or, showing a thing, interest in some pattern, say that the blouse or pants are beautiful, warm and comfortable.

Sometimes the baby does not like the clothes because they are uncomfortable for him, but he cannot put it into words. If you go outside and the child objects to a warm jacket, explain that it is cold outside, show that you will also dress warmly. But in no case go on screaming, do not dress the child by force. This will negatively affect your future relationship.

The kid grows, develops, learns, acquires some skills. When something does not work out for him, he can burst into tears, scatter objects, toys. Crying in this case, he calls you for help, since he himself cannot cope. Find out what he wants. Help him to do this, but do not yell at him, and even more so do not help him silently. It might look something like this: “Let me help you. I'll show you how to do it and you'll do it again" or "Let's do it together."

The child does not want to go to a nursery or kindergarten. Keep in mind that he finds himself in an environment unfamiliar to him and the period of adaptation can be very different - someone gets used to it very quickly, while the other will need more time. After all, the baby is deprived of your presence and is very afraid to stay in an unfamiliar environment without you.

Explain to him why you are sending him to kindergarten. Try to suggest that you are not doing this to get rid of him, not because you are tired of him, you are tired or you have more important things to do, but to help him spend his time more interesting and richer.

To make the baby adapt faster, you need effort and patience. In no case should you drag the child to the kindergarten by force, yell at him and scare him that you will not take him home if he does not stop crying. Try so that going to kindergarten does not become a psychological trauma for him, but, on the contrary, turns out to be a joyful event. It should be prepared in advance for this.

Arriving in the kindergarten, the baby should already have the skills to wash, dress independently, sit on the potty. Therefore, instill in him the necessary everyday skills in advance so that he has more time for games and there are no offensive problems associated with the inability to do something on his own.

Tell us more about the kindergarten, about what the child will do there. Be sure to say that he is already big and you are proud of him, because he can now go to kindergarten, just like you can go to work.

Try to convince him that they will not offend him in the kindergarten, that there are other children and toys there. You can take his favorite toy with you so that he is calmer, since a piece of the house and everything that he is used to is with him. Don't run away as soon as you bring your baby. Slowly undress him and lead him into the group by the hand, interest him in something so that the baby is distracted.

There are children who cannot get used to the kindergarten for a very long time, they are afraid to go there, they resist, they cry. In a group, they hide in a corner, do not play with anyone, and avoid educators. First of all, try to talk with the child, establish the reason, maybe the teachers treat him badly or offend other children?

In the kindergarten, in the course of communication, kids, like adults, may have conflict situations. Most often this is due to toys. They can push him, offend him, take away the toy with which he wanted to play. Talk to him and, having found out the reason, try to eliminate it, but this does not mean that you urgently need to transfer the baby to another nursery or kindergarten. Be patient, act gradually, ask him in detail about what he did, with whom he played. All this will help him to believe that he will be fine in the kindergarten, and he can perfectly play with other children before his mother arrives.

As you know, children are very fond of outdoor games, they love to run and very often fall, get dirty. You can not punish for this, shout. This is natural for his age and very useful for his development. Imagine what will happen from a child if he sits quietly on a chair, having lost his usual mobility? Muscle weakness may develop, he will be more prone to diseases, lagging behind his peers.

If the baby fell, hit hard, tore off his knees, do not yell at him, he is already scared. Try to calm, distract, carefully treat the wounds. Explain that it is not so scary and will heal soon.

If the baby is “overloaded” with impressions, it is difficult for him to understand and perceive a large amount of information received, to “digest” it, he begins to act up, cry. It is necessary to talk with him about his impressions, try to find out what annoys him or, on the contrary, interested him. If something is not clear to him, do not brush it off, try to explain it to him so that he understands.

In no case should you frighten and deceive a child. The shock caused by fright can have a detrimental effect on his psyche, he may begin to stutter, twitch, be afraid of the dark, loud noises, a room in which there is no one. If the baby is naughty, crying, in no case frighten him with wolves, witches and other scary characters, this can lead to the development of mental illness.

Sometimes the baby may cry because he is just bored. Try to cheer him up. Offer him something to do, do something together. Get your child interested. Look at a picture book, play something, in the end, just chat with him. Very often, parents dismiss their children, citing their fatigue, employment. All this can end badly enough. He will close in on himself, hold a grudge, and you risk losing not only his trust, but also the child as a person in general.

There is no simple and universal recipe here. However, it can be said with certainty that sensitivity and vulnerability are signs of the mental make-up of such children, properties of their nervous system. You cannot change these innate features at will. Moreover, such means of educational influence as persuasion, reproaches, punishments, screams, ridicule will not help here, but rather even bring a negative result. Any violent measures will cause an increase in tension and excitement, weaken the baby's nervous system even more, take away strength and self-confidence.

Even the most loving parents will not be able to protect their child from life's troubles, because you can't keep a child under a glass cap all the time. Therefore, the easiest tactic in dealing with such children is not to get annoyed by their crying. But being with them is the best way to calm them down. Let him feel that you are ready to help him, because this is so important to him.

Try to switch his attention to something else, give some specific task so that it interests the baby and, of course, is within his power.

In a word, the most important thing that is required of parents is patience. Do not forget that high emotional sensitivity is closely related to responsiveness, kindness, cordiality, readiness to help, stand up for the weak, and these are very valuable human qualities!

Therefore, no matter how strange it sounds, listen to the children's crying, delve into its meaning, and do not try to interrupt it as quickly as possible, dry the children's tears. Crying and tears are the language of children's communication, so do not be deaf to it just because you have forgotten how to speak it yourself.

If a child is afraid of strangers, of course, he expresses this with the help of tears. Fear of strangers is a typical form of maladjusted behavior of a baby. It is at this time that he is in dire need of your support, understanding, and protection. A calm, friendly family atmosphere helps to relieve tension and makes it easy to cope with the problem.

The child's world is still mostly limited by the walls of the house, the courtyard or the kindergarten, so the appearance of an unfamiliar face causes the baby's alertness. If a stranger behaves harmlessly from his point of view, for example, does not touch his toys, lacks his parents in an armful, alertness gradually disappears. Otherwise, it can develop into a panic fear and even a persistent phobia.

It is good when parents are sympathetic to this problem. This means that they will not allow themselves to commit violence against a child just in order to demonstrate to their acquaintances their achievements in the field of educating the younger generation.

If your baby is crying, do not rush to call a doctor or stuff him with pills and potions, just pat him on the head. The warm soft hands of the mother touched the baby, stroked the back, tummy, chest, lingered a little longer on the forehead, and the baby calmed down.

Amazing effect, right? But there is nothing unusual about this. It has long been known that massage has a calming effect, especially if it is done by the mother. She, as it were, conveys her warmth, calmness to the baby, and he stops crying and being capricious. By showing maximum patience and attention, in the future you will be rewarded for this with the health and well-being of your child.

Chapter 3

How to win the trust of a child? How to call him to frankness? Parents very often ask themselves this question, but sometimes, unfortunately, it is too late when it is very difficult to regain lost trust, respect and authority.

First of all, do not lose this trust. Indeed, from the very first days of his existence, the baby sees in you his protection and always runs to his mother when someone offends him or something does not work out for him. So do not rush to break the physical and emotional unity that arises between you and the child. Smile, talk to the baby, and it does not matter that he does not understand the meaning of your words, the main thing for him is that they communicate with him, the intonation with which you pronounce the words matters.

The unity that has been established between you and the baby from the very first days of its existence will, of course, change over time, but it will still remain the unity of mother and child, which has only passed into a new, meaningful quality. You will get rid of many problems if you become for him not only a mother, but also a friend.

The child is able to feel and understand whether he is loved, whether he is happy, whether he is treated with respect. So, it’s not enough to tell him that he is loved, he must fully find confirmation of this so that it doesn’t turn out that you tell him about your love, but in fact he feels very lonely.

Deception leads to the fact that the child gradually loses trust in adults, because at any moment he expects danger. Constant alertness unnerves him, makes him shy and whiny. In no case should you fraudulently achieve something from him.

For example, if mom went to the store, and dad says that mom will be back soon and bring something sweet, the baby begins to run from window to window in anticipation. And when the mother finally comes and does not bring the sweets promised by the father, he gets disappointed, and he cries out of resentment. If this happens repeatedly, the baby will no longer trust you.

The lack of maternal love and attention leads to the fact that the baby withdraws into himself, becomes lonely next to loved ones. But childhood loneliness is a rather terrible thing. Parents are engaged in solving their problems: career, finances, personal life - leaving the child to himself, limiting the relationship with him exclusively to issues of care.

Communication with peers is very important. And if the baby is embarrassed to make contact with other children, he needs help. The help of adults is invaluable here. It must be introduced to other children by name, asked what they are playing and whether they will accept another participant. Usually, there is always someone among the guys who takes the newcomer under his protection, helps him get used to the new company.

But sometimes it happens that they can offend him, call him names, come up with an offensive nickname for him. After such incidents, the child closes, preferring loneliness.

It may turn out that his own misconduct, which caused severe emotional stress, made him unsociable. Playing with other children, the baby could inadvertently drop his comrade, get hit by a snowball ... The sight of blood and inconsolable sobs can have a strong impact on the psyche of the baby. As a result, he refuses the usual games, does not communicate with friends, does not go out, sitting at home for hours, and responds to all persuasion with a stream of tears.

In this case, you can not persuade him or swear. You can help him restore peace of mind by talking, explaining the situation so that his guilt complex dissipates.

The busyness of modern adults is one of the signs of our time, when parents, in addition to their main job, manage to run part-time jobs, have two jobs, and take things home. What if the child is raised by a single mother? Here the question of raising a normal, full-fledged person is very acute.

The decision to have a child is connected with the acceptance by adults of responsibility for his fate. But to consider yourself the root cause of everything that happens to him is by no means wrong. The child is responsible for his actions. It is worth asking him to do something himself, he will understand that he must be responsible for his actions. Endless instructions and parting words, and even more so lamentations and lamentations after his unseemly act, will lead him to aggression.

In order to understand your child, change his behavior, make contact or regain lost trust, you must first change yourself. Open your eyes. After all, you are accustomed to forbid everything to him and demanded unconditional obedience. It's convenient for you. But try to understand that the child has his own "I", his own affairs, aspirations, needs, independence. Realizing this, you can soberly assess your relationship with him.

Analyze your behavior, your attitude towards the baby, every gesture, word, action, put yourself in his place, and this will allow you to establish mutual understanding.

It is important to understand that education is cooperation, interaction, mutual influence, mutual enrichment (emotional, moral, spiritual, intellectual) between adults and a child.

In order to successfully raise a child, parents must certainly correct their behavior, engage in self-education, and not set bad examples. If you want to get from him the unquestioning fulfillment of your requirements, which you yourself do not actually follow, you will succeed only through coercive measures: the child will fulfill the requirements formally, because of the fear of punishment. This fear ultimately breeds deceit, hypocrisy, cunning...

Do we understand our children? To understand a person means to see the reasons for his actions, to explain the motives that prompted him to act in a certain way. To learn to understand, it is necessary to reduce the excessive demands that he is simply not able to fulfill.

It is possible to explain the child's behavior by analyzing the conditions under which its development occurs. If the baby was constantly shouted at, physically punished, he would most likely develop a need to avoid such shocks and, as a result, such negative traits as deceit, fearfulness, distrust, aggressiveness will appear ...

If the baby was protected from labor and adults did everything for him, the child becomes lazy, weak-willed, will avoid any business, which means they will pretend, fawn, trick, deceive.

Another option is when the baby was simply spoiled: they bought expensive things and toys, they did not refuse him anything. Such a child develops exorbitant claims, but at the same time an inability to protect things and appreciate the work invested in them. Remember that the lack of communication cannot be filled with expensive toys, things, unquestioning fulfillment of all his desires.

The baby will develop poorly intellect, thinking, the ability to experience, interest in knowledge, if you have not read books to him, communicated little with him. After all, intellectual inclinations are laid from early childhood, so communicate with him, teach him to love books, but do not force him to read - you will get the opposite, negative effect.

Sometimes parents are very zealous in the education of their children. From an early age, they hire tutors, give them to prestigious kindergartens and educational institutions with special biases, load them with music schools, dances, etc. But somehow they forget to ask him if he likes all this. Note that a very small number of children are engaged in singing, dancing, music with pleasure.

Do not load the baby with what he is not interested in. Try to find out his addictions and find the appropriate occupation. Give him the right to choose, the right to decide for himself what to do.

Develop children's abilities from early childhood. Awaken attention in their soul, excite ideas and observation. To do this, use a variety of objects, learn to describe them, talk about their purpose. Develop mental abilities that will help your baby find himself in the future.

To develop a child's feelings of love, compassion, you can get some kind of pet. He will proudly tell everyone that he has a hamster or a kitten. Show your child how to properly care for him, what to feed him, how to treat him in general. If you notice that he offends the animal, explain that he is also alive and it hurts. Tell that the animal has lost its parents, it is very lonely, and it needs someone to take care of it.

Teach him to take care of the animal himself, and you will see what the result will be. This will instill in him not only a love for nature and animals, but will help him understand his significance, the need for someone, and relieve the feeling of loneliness. The child will look at your relationship with him with different eyes, which will help strengthen them.

Understand that what the baby is doing is extremely important for him, even if it seems to you that this is not so. Let me give you an example from my own practice. A young mother came to see me and said: “Once my son came up to me and asked me to play with him. At that time, I was watching an interesting program and explained to the baby that I was busy now, and I would play with him later. After a while, when I went into the child's room, I saw that he was putting a toy under the bed, then taking it out and putting it back in. I called the child to dinner, to which I received the following answer: “I’m busy now, I’ll come later.”

The woman did not know how to react to such an answer. This was repeated many times. I explained to the young mother that the child imitates her in everything, and, in his opinion, what he does is very important for him. Therefore, he does not understand his mother's indignation at his behavior. After all, he was waiting for an important program for his mother to end. So why doesn't she want to wait?

Sometimes, in order for a child to understand what care and respect is, he himself needs to take care of someone. For example, you come home from work, you are tired, you have a severe headache, there are troubles at work. The kid looks at you inquisitively, wondering why you are in such a state. Ask him to bring you a drink. Tell him, without going into details, that you were offended at work, let the baby show sympathy, let him pity you. So he will understand that you need him, you cannot live without him.

If you notice a tendency to lie in your baby, try to discover the reason. Often lies arise from fear of punishment. Do not punish him too severely, especially as cruel corporal punishments should be avoided. Try to find out why the child lied, delve into his problem. Maybe, after talking with him, you will save him not only from this vice, fear, but also from other complexes.

Let the baby show his importance, reckon with his desires (reasonable, of course!). After all, self-expression is the main, urgent need of human nature.

Let your baby participate in your activities, whether you're cleaning the floor or making breakfast. It is very important for him to feel that he is trusted to do something on an equal basis with adults. After all, children from an early age begin to imitate their parents, very quickly absorbing everything they see and hear. Involving a child in some business not only teaches him to work, but also brings him closer to his parents. Such a child will treat his parents with respect and understanding, to what they do.

It is not necessary to entrust the baby with something difficult, with which he is not able to cope. Give him a task that he can complete: wash his cup, wipe the dust off the table, finally put his toys away. Praise him, say that he helped you a lot and without him you would not have coped.

In no case do not scream if the baby is trying to do something that he is not able to handle. See how he tries to do it, help him. Tell him he's good.

If, for example, you decide to sew something for yourself, and your daughter is spinning next to the doll, involve her in your occupation. Give me scraps of fabric, let him do something too. If she can't do something, help her. Do not forget about praise, because it means a lot to a child.

Or another situation: dad is making a shelf in the hallway. The little son is spinning nearby, grabs tools, nails, “gets confused” underfoot. Do not chase him away, do not be afraid that he will hit his fingers with a hammer or drop the tool on his foot. Let him help, say that without him nothing will work. Give such a task that he will happily complete it and that it is safe for him. You will see an amazing result when the son proudly tells everyone that he and his dad made a shelf.

Joint games that bring not only pleasure, but also educational information have a very positive effect on relations with the child. Children's games are their main occupation, but they should be directed in such a way that they arouse the harmonious activity of all the mental faculties of the baby, avoiding one-sidedness.

Offer him a speed game, for example, who will collect the pyramid faster. Of course, you should give in, and when the baby proudly shows that he did it first, praise him.

Playing with the baby or doing some business, you get close to him. The child is interested in you, you are one.

Walking has a very positive effect on family relationships. You have probably often seen a picture when a baby, holding tightly to the hands of his father and mother, proudly walks for a walk. Run with him, play some games, swing on a swing, roll in the snow or throw snowballs at the target. Joint walks not only cheer up, contribute to better physical development of the baby, but also strengthen relationships.

Small children, it would seem, at such an unintelligent age, surprisingly subtly perceive any, including the most intimate, feelings of their parents. Under normal conditions, it is the harmonious combination of these feelings that creates a feeling of confidence and happiness in the child.

In order for mutual understanding and trust to exist between you, you must give all your love and attention to the baby, from early childhood teach him to work, respect adults, and value friendship. Give him as much attention as possible, do not dismiss his childhood problems as an annoying fly.

Try to become a real friend to your child, and then you will see his shining eyes and understand that for him you are not just a mother, an object of adoration and admiration, reliable protection and support, you are his most faithful and reliable friend.

For most of us, babies are adorable. True, only if the little one snores quietly in a dream or smiles funny (we recommend reading:). Frequent tantrums and tears of infants, the causes of which are sometimes impossible to explain, cause adults to feel irritated because of their own impotence. However, such emotions are a bad helper. It is very important to understand why a newborn cries and take appropriate measures. Consider the main reasons for tears in babies, and also find out how to calm a crying baby.

When a baby cries, young parents often feel powerless.

physical discomfort

Why do newborn babies cry? Crying is due to various factors. One of them is an instinctive reluctance to be alone. If a child under 1 month old screams and cries in connection with this circumstance, then it is easy to calm him down: pick him up, look into his eyes, say something in a calm, gentle voice.

Did not help? It is likely that the newborn is crying because of a more serious problem - physical discomfort caused by uncomfortable clothing, improper room conditions, and so on. The exact reason can be understood by the way the baby cries:

Reason for crying	Behavioral features	How to calm the baby?
Wet clothes (diaper, diaper)	The child hiccups, cries, fidgets, trying not to touch the wet.	Remove wet clothes, clean and dry the skin, put on new underwear.
Uncomfortable clothing (improper swaddling)	The baby begins to scream indignantly immediately after putting on new clothes or swaddling.	Buttons, buttons, snakes, threads, crumbs or seams that dig into delicate skin can cause discomfort. Things may be too tight or hard. Clothing made from synthetic fabrics with dyes causes itching. The baby should be changed quickly.
Uncomfortable posture	The newborn whimpers, cries, waves his arms and legs, trying to change his position.	The baby needs to be laid differently.
Too hot or cold	The baby sobs. Signs of overheating - hot and red skin, in advanced cases - a rash. Manifestations of hypothermia - pale and cold covers.	The newborn should be changed according to the temperature conditions in the room.

The cause of fussy movements and crying of the child can be a wet diaper

Feeling hungry and feeding problems

A common reason newborns cry is hunger. In the first weeks, most babies “hang on their chest” almost all the time. Then lactation is established, and an approximate schedule is developed, however, at one of the meals, the baby may eat less than expected. Of course, he will begin to demand milk out of schedule and scream loudly. If, after being attached to the breast or bottle, the newborn quickly subsided, hunger was the cause of the crying.

The baby began to eat, but started crying again? So something is bothering him. Problems that may occur during or after feeding and lead to crying:

Problem	Behavioral features	What to do?
Nasal congestion	The baby begins to suck on the breast or bottle, but then quits and screams in annoyance. Sniffling or snoring.	Clean the nose with a special aspirator (pear), rinse with drops (saline), drip the drug for the common cold, prescribed by the doctor.
swallowed a lot of milk	The cry is short and not repetitive.	Wait a bit.
Otitis	When swallowing, the pain in the ear increases, so the baby stops eating and screams loudly.	Drip vasoconstrictor drops into the nose, and special painkillers into the ears. Contact a doctor.
Stomatitis	A sign of candidal stomatitis (thrush) is a white coating on the oral mucosa. The kid feels a burning sensation and refuses to eat.	Wipe the oral cavity with a weak soda solution (2%). Visit a doctor.
Specific taste of milk (mixture)	The baby tries to eat, but then turns away from the breast or bottle.	The use of certain products - onions, garlic, lamb and others - leads to a change in the taste of milk. They should not be eaten in large quantities. In addition, mom should not use cosmetics with a strong aroma.
Air entered the stomach	Immediately after eating or during it, the baby pulls its legs to the stomach and screams.	The baby needs to be taken in a "column", leaning his stomach against his chest. This will allow excess air to escape.

Chilled teether helps relieve pain and itching of swollen gums

It is wrong to immediately offer a breast or a bottle to a baby when he is crying. To begin with, you should pick it up, shake it. If these actions do not help to calm him down, the child cries pitifully and shows that he wants to eat - sucks his fists, smacks his lips, then feeding should not be postponed.

If the newborn is constantly crying, you should make sure that he is not starving. There are certain standards for weight gain in children up to a year. The baby should be periodically weighed and compared with the reference increase. The pediatrician should be informed about the lag in the pace - he will recommend how to increase the volume of feeding.

With artificial feeding, the child often cries not from hunger, but from thirst. Mom needs to always have a bottle of drinking water ready.

Colic and increased gas production

Why is the baby crying all the time? At the age of 1-3 months, many children suffer from colic - severe painful cramps in the abdomen due to stretching of the intestinal walls with gas bubbles. The main sign of colic is that the baby cries piercingly inconsolably for a long time, taking short breaks. Additional symptoms:

• redness of the face;
• "knee" with legs;
• flatulence (hard stomach);
• clenching fists.

Colic is associated with the immaturity of the digestive system of babies, but malnutrition or the nervous tension of a nursing mother can aggravate the situation. For most children, the problem is solved when they are 3-4 months old.

What to do if the child is crying due to abdominal pain? You can calm him down in one of the following ways:

• put something warm on the tummy - a diaper ironed with an iron or a heated bag with flax seeds;
• make a massage - with a warm hand, stroke around the navel in a clockwise direction;
• put the baby on the stomach (not all children like this position);
• to vilify the baby vertically so that excess air comes out;
• lay the baby on his back and give him the “frog” position - bend the legs at the knees and connect the feet, thanks to this, gases are easier to escape, another effective exercise is imitation of cycling;
• give a medicine for colic prescribed by a doctor (Espumizan, Sab Simplex, Bobotik, BabyKali, etc.), or dill water (we recommend reading:);
• put the child with his bare stomach on his stomach, ensuring skin-to-skin contact;
• put the baby in the sling facing you.

Problems emptying the bladder or bowels

Why else does a baby have to cry? Possible causes are cystitis and constipation. Inflammation of the bladder (cystitis) is accompanied by pain during urination and fever. The condition requires urgent medical attention.

If the baby cries during a bowel movement or pushes and does not poop, he has constipation. Frequent problems with bowel movements can lead to the appearance of cracks in the rectum. The problem should be reported to the pediatrician. As a symptomatic therapy, you can use:

• microclysters Microlax;
• glycerin suppositories;
• Lactulose syrup (has a delayed effect, causing stool the next day).

Constipation can be the cause of excruciating discomfort in a child.

Some Physiological Causes of Crying

Why does a baby sometimes cry? The sobbing of a newborn can be triggered by various painful conditions:

State	essence	Symptoms	How to help a crying baby?
"Breast migraine"	Infants who were diagnosed at birth with perinatal encephalopathy (PEP) can suffer from headaches. This syndrome is characterized by increased pressure inside the skull, nervous excitability, impaired muscle tone (increase or decrease).	Attacks of "baby migraine" occur when weather conditions change, atmospheric pressure drops. In addition, windy, cloudy or rainy weather can cause a headache. At the same time, the baby screams, sleeps poorly, and shows anxiety. Vomiting, indigestion may occur.	In such a situation, it is impossible to do without the help of a specialist. It is necessary to visit a pediatrician or a neurologist and talk about the problem.
Diaper rash (diaper rash)	Due to the contact of the baby's skin with feces and urine, its acid-base balance is disturbed. The result is a painful irritation.	Signs of diaper dermatitis: rash and redness in the area of ​​the perineum and buttocks; irritability of the child; crying that gets worse when changing diapers.	Necessary: use a healing agent (Bepanten cream); change diapers in a timely manner; thoroughly cleanse the skin; periodically arrange "air baths". If the irritation is very strong, a doctor's consultation is required to prescribe treatment.
Teething	When a baby is teething, the gums swell, itch, and become painful.	The baby sobs, pulls everything into his mouth to "nibble." He has increased salivation. In some cases, there is an increase in body temperature.	Itchy gums can be "scratched" with a finger wrapped in a sterile bandage. A good way to help is a chilled teether. In addition, there are anesthetic gels that can be applied to the mucous membrane. At temperatures above 38.5 ° C, it is worth giving an antipyretic.

If the baby cries piercingly for a long time, and it was not possible to find out the cause, you need to seek medical help

Psychological discomfort

Consider why a newborn baby can still cry, because the reasons are not only physical, but also psychological. The most frequent of them are appeal, protest and accumulated fatigue:

1. The child cries on the rise, if he wants to attract the attention of an adult. The summoning cry does not last long and repeats at short intervals. The volume gradually increases. If you come to the baby, then he will calm down. Dr. Komarovsky does not advise immediately taking the crumbs in your arms. You can pet him or talk to him.
2. If a newborn child begins to cry in protest, then the cry is sharp and occurs immediately after the "inappropriate" action. Such necessary procedures as changing clothes, cutting nails, cleaning ears can lead to indignation. They should be brought to the end, and then caress the baby.
3. If the baby has become moody and sobs a lot, he is probably tired. Hysteria can be provoked by too long wakefulness, a large number of strangers around, a lot of impressions and events during the day.
4. If a newborn cries every time before going to bed, the daily routine is incorrect. Overwork prevents him from calming down.

The crying of a child due to fatigue can be calmed as follows:

• complete / exclude mobile and emotional games;
• ventilate the room and humidify the air in it;
• switch to calm communication;
• shake, sing a lullaby;
• put to bed, give a pacifier.

If the child is tired, you should calmly lay him down, help him fall asleep

You can prevent the crying of an infant by observing a certain sequence of actions (ritual) every night. For most babies, this combination helps to fall asleep: bathing - feeding - laying in the crib - turning off the main lights - turning on the nightlight - lullaby.

If the reason for crying a newborn at the age of 1-3 months is psychological discomfort, the advice of the American doctor Harvey Karp will help to quickly lull him to sleep:

1. Swaddling. It is not necessary to constantly wrap the baby in diapers, but wrapping up will help to quickly calm the child, who is naughty and cries before going to bed. It is important to close the handles. It is better to use modern elastic diapers.
2. wiggle. If a newborn rolls up and cries, it is worth shaking it. The baby should be picked up so that he lies on his side and start smooth movements with a small amplitude.
3. "White noise". The child is helped to soothe hissing sounds, uttered in a quiet voice. Their reproduction is recommended to be combined with rhythmic motion sickness.
4. Sucking. Is the baby crying inconsolably? The best way to calm him down is to let him satisfy his sucking reflex. A pacifier, mother's breast or a bottle with a small amount of mixture will help with this. However, the peanut should not be allowed to overeat.

Sometimes, to soothe a child, it is enough for a mother to shake him in her arms.

Calming a baby older than 3 months

A baby who cries constantly at 2 months old can be soothed by one of the methods described. If a baby is older than 3-4 months old, swaddling or “hissing” it does not make sense. During this period, the crying infant must be distracted from the problem that upset him.

From the moment of birth, the most key signal for a child, until he learns to speak and explain himself in words, is crying. At an early age, he belongs to the universal mechanism of communication, with which the baby expresses a whole palette of his feelings and emotions, demonstrates his desires and emotions. It often happens that a newborn often screams and cries, haunting himself and his parents. What can be associated with sleep problems and his cries? How to recognize the child's signals and eliminate their causes in a timely manner?

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Development of crying and sleep problems

For a newborn baby, crying is a way to signal any unpleasant, uncomfortable or painful sensations.

When a newborn is healthy and well fed, nothing bothers him, he spends most of his time in the first weeks of his life in a dream. Therefore, for the most part, due to crying, the child expresses his emotions, complains of feeling unwell, and parents should not ignore such signals.

But young parents often do not understand why the child screams, sobs inconsolably and cannot fall asleep. Gradually, over time, they already distinguish the source of problems by the intonation and strength of the cry, its tone and behavior. There are relatively simple and easily eliminated causes of lack of sleep and crying, although more serious, painful and dangerous conditions are quite possible.

The main causes of crying in newborns

There are quite physiological and obvious reasons for crying in children, because of which he cannot fall asleep. These include:

When applied to the breast or when the baby is given a bottle of formula, he calms down and calms down. Babies can also quench their thirst by applying to the chest, and for this, artificial people need to be given some water in a bottle. At first, until an approximate feeding rhythm has been established, the baby may often cry when he is hungry.

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It is important not to ignore the requirements of the crumbs, waiting for a certain hour to feed, otherwise the crying will turn into hysteria, during which it will be extremely difficult to calm and feed the raging baby. If the baby was immediately understood and fed on time, he usually falls asleep.

Crying and sleep problems when overexcited

Most often, the child cannot fall asleep and screams, cries due to overexcitation. His nervous system is very vulnerable and immature, it often needs rest in order to restore its working capacity, control the work of all organs and systems and develop.

The depletion of nervous processes occurs the sooner, the younger the crumbs.

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If at the same time with fatigue the child received too many new impressions and emotions, this will lead to even greater fatigue of his nervous system. As a result, the child cannot sleep, although he is very tired, because of which he screams, cries and cannot calm down. As a result, tantrums are formed with choking screams and cries, which greatly frightens parents.

It is important to avoid overwork and tantrums monitoring the condition and well-being of the crumbs. This can be achieved by observing a strict daily regimen, where there will be enough time for sleep, all the necessary hygiene procedures and all the conditions for a comfortable stay and falling asleep. It is a cozy and clean room, well ventilated, with comfortable temperature and humidity. It is not necessary to create crumbs of perfect silence from birth for sleep, he should sleep under normal family conditions, this will help make sleep not so sensitive and intermittent.

So that the child is not overexcited, doctors do not recommend his presence at noisy and mass events, concerts and on long trips. It is worth at least for the first time to protect it from a large number of guests and strangers. This will not only give the child peace of mind, but also protect against unnecessary encounters with infections, which can also disturb sleep and lead to crying.

If the child is tired after visiting the guests, did not sleep for a long time and screamed, you need to take him in your arms, put him on your chest, rock him in your arms and calm him down. Some babies are helped by tight swaddling or wrapping in a blanket, others - a warm bath, relaxing and soothing the baby.

Sleep problems and crying in natural function disorders

Often the child cannot sleep and constantly cries when there are problems with natural needs - defecation or urination. Many children may cry or whimper before emptying their bladder, even if there are no health problems, simply not understanding what is happening to them, and frightened by this fact. There is no need to worry in this case, usually these are light whimpers, followed by a wet diaper. However, sleep disturbances and constant crying, kicking and screaming when urinating, or straining hard before wetting your panties is an alarming sign. This may be a sign of anomalies in the structure of the urinary tract, inflammation in the bladder walls, and in boys - problems with the penis and its structure.

If the child is constantly restless, the process of urination leads to screams, while the body temperature also rises, you should immediately consult a doctor and take tests (at least general ones - and).

Often, problems with bowel movements also lead to sleep disorders and crying with screams. Especially against the background of artificial feeding, resulting in the wrong selection of the mixture, its inaccurate dilution, or with a lack of fluid in the body to. Defecation is especially unpleasant in the presence of cracks in the anus, due to straining and thick stools. In this case, the baby will toss and turn and grunt, wince and scream loudly, especially against the background of a long absence of stool. From screams and constant fruitless attempts, the baby does not sleep well, his tummy swells, and it is important to consult a doctor to identify and eliminate the causes of constipation.

Poor sleep and crying against the background of colic

In the period from about three weeks of age to three months, when the intestinal wall gradually matures and the formation of microflora occurs, many children suffer from which literally harass some children and deprive them of rest and sleep. Colic is not a disease, it is a temporary and transient phenomenon associated with the accumulation of gas in the intestines.. They stretch the intestinal loops and irritate pain receptors, which creates spasm and discomfort, especially in the late afternoon, when the nervous system is already tired and irritated. Against the background of colic, the child often does not sleep well, wakes up crying and screams, in the evening periods of crying can last up to several hours, until the spasms and pain recede.

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Signs of colic will be sharp crying and screaming with tucking up of the legs and straining, reddening of the face, bulging of the fontanel, sometimes with transitions into tantrums. The cry is sharp and loud, painful, with arching of the arms, tension in the abdomen.

It is important that parents know how to help the baby in order to alleviate his condition. It is necessary to massage the tummy, bend the legs, helping the passage of gases, carry it in your arms down with your tummy, rock it and soothe it. If colic has become daily and severe, sometimes you can help with medicines that a doctor can advise, they are selected individually, they do not always help and not all children.

Violations of the temperature regime as a cause of crying

If adults, having a perfect system of thermoregulation and the ability to dress or undress according to the weather, do not suffer much from temperature fluctuations, then for newborns this is a serious problem. They are extremely uncomfortable both in conditions of freezing and overheating, but they themselves cannot untie themselves or dress warmer, and therefore they sleep poorly and cry. Hypothermia is dangerous at an early age, it was strong and prolonged, and for this it is necessary that the baby be undressed for at least half an hour in an extremely cool room, or even in the cold. In other cases, with slight freezing, children, due to awakening, screaming and crying, active movements of their legs and arms against this background, activate metabolism and warm up. This is a defense mechanism. After they calmed down and warmed up, sleep returned to normal.

But overheating for a child is much more dangerous than a slight freezing, since in this case the protective mechanisms do not work, especially if there is a tight swaddling or a large amount of clothes carefully put on by mothers and grandmothers.

Overheating leads to inhibition of metabolic processes, suppression of immunity and disruption of brain development.

During the neonatal period and the first about six months, the mechanisms of sweating are imperfect, the baby cannot fully cool the body. Then sleep suffers, the baby cannot fall asleep and screams, cries, blushes. In the area of ​​\u200b\u200bthe skin folds, against the background of overheating, there may be diaper rash and prickly heat throughout the body, which only increases the discomfort and suffering of the crumbs. Itching and pain of the skin, redness and the risk of infection further disrupt sleep and constantly provoke crying. In this case, it will be constant and monotonous, on one note, with a transition to whining, or flow into hysterics.

Restless sleep and crying

Many parents are extremely worried about the poor sleep of children with constant awakenings and crying in their sleep, after which it is difficult for them to re-lay. This is due to several reasons, usually easily eliminated and not dangerous, but requiring the attention of mom and dad. This:

You should not wait for a complete awakening and screams of the crumbs, you need to immediately respond to his signals by picking up and calming him, putting him on his chest or giving him a bottle or a pacifier. This will help not to go into tantrums and calm down, calmly falling asleep.

External causes, discomfort and crying

If the baby is not hungry and not tired, while he cries and does not want to sleep, the reasons for this may be quite banal inconvenience from wet diapers, a leaking or overflowing diaper, rubbing the seams of clothes. It is important to timely select diapers by size, so that they do not press or rub delicate skin, and also change them in a timely manner so that stool and urine do not irritate the perineum and do not lead to pain.

Painful causes of sleep disorders and crying

They can cause poor restless sleep or difficulty falling asleep, as well as the causes of tantrums and crying, the presence of skin diseases, or. So, against the background of skin pathologies and allergic rashes, severe itching of the skin usually occurs, which simply does not let you fall asleep, the child screams, rubs against the crib, worries, you can alleviate his condition by contacting a doctor and determining the cause of the skin lesion, using local or systemic drugs against inflammation and itching, allergies.

In most children, teething begins after six months, but some may encounter this phenomenon earlier. Therefore, one of the leading problems in the second half of the year, which leads to tantrums, crying and sleep disorders, is discomfort in the gum area with itching, swelling and discomfort. Often the baby puts everything in his mouth, tries to gnaw toys and sucks his fists, he has a lot of saliva. Special cooling teethers, dryers, rubber toys, as well as the use of teething gels for severe anxiety can help in these cases.

What are the dangers of frequent crying and sleep disorders?

Many parents and the older generation do not see anything wrong with the crying of children, letting them “shout out” and not making attempts to calm them down. This is not a physiological method of dealing with crying, whatever its cause, especially if the child is also not sleeping well.

Crying loads and overexcites the nervous system, threatens the development of “rolling up” with periods of respiratory arrest and acute hypoxia of the brain. This will have an extremely negative impact on the development of the child, leading to his nervousness and anxiety, learning difficulties and disinhibition of excitation processes.

Alena Paretskaya, pediatrician, medical commentator