How to improve self-esteem if you are a girl. How to increase self-esteem and self-confidence in a woman. Unhealthy social environment
Many people throughout their lives seek false ways to boost their self-esteem by hiding behind expensive thingsaiming for perfect figure... If you think for a second and remember some famous and successful personalities who were seen in simple clothes and hardly looked like successful ones, more like “hipsters”. It is unlikely that they suffer from low self-esteem, because their bank account suggests otherwise.
Everything comes from our consciousness and subconsciousness, from how and what we think and what feelings we experience at this moment.
Of course, our physical health... How we eat, whether we do sports. After all, if we feel unwell, we are unlikely to be sure of everything.
1. Fear.
Often, before making a decision, we are afraid. Fear protects our body from danger, leaving us in a comfort zone, as a result of which we do not dare to change something. Everyone dreams of something that they just can't start doing, someone has always wanted to learn how to snowboard or discover their own cooking, and perhaps even have a child. But at the stage of thinking about this, we already feel fear, although we have not even taken a step to implement our plans.
One of the first goals on the road to self-esteem is to get rid of fear.
Sit at home in a quiet room, relax, and reflect on your fear. Imagine it like a framed painting. Then imagine this picture moving away from you and becoming less and less noticeable, eventually turning into a point that disappears altogether.
The next way to get rid of fear is to feel the insignificance of fear, and also that it does not deserve your worries. And then erase this painting with your hand, as if you were rubbing your hand over a foggy window.
2. Flexibility of character.
Develop flexibility in your character. Everyone has probably noticed a sharp reaction to a minor incident - for example, friends decide to cancel a meeting at the last minute. Scientists believe that this comes from our childhood. To begin with, be clear about when you start to react sharply. Are the circumstances so scary to react like that? Is this situation worth it to react so sharply? If these questions make you want to defend yourself, then you are indeed overreacting to this situation... The first step towards overcoming such reactions is to understand their essence and understand what caused them in your past. Another way is to deliberately, consciously change your habits. Ask yourself how attached you are to your regular plans. Can you take a different route from work? Or go to the store on Wednesday instead of Thursday as usual? Can you change your plans without disorienting yourself? This is your chance to become more flexible. Flexibility in one area makes it possible to develop flexibility in other areas.
3. Set tasks for yourself and solve them.
Set realistic goals for yourself and achieve them. Choose the most important from your daily tasks and solve them. You will experience a sense of contentment and ease when you start with the most difficult tasks and you will gradually move towards easier ones. Perhaps, success will not always be, but this should not depress you, on the contrary, remember the tasks that you have already completed. Feel the confidence that you can achieve everything (“the foundation was poured, the walls were erected, the overlap remained, but there are not enough resources. It's okay. But how quickly the foundation was poured and how well everything else was done”). Always think about what you do well. If something works out, then you deserve it. Self-confidence will come when you realize that the tasks have been completed, even if they were small and simple.
How to learn to appreciate yourself?
Each of us is a unique personality, each has a certain set of personal qualities, skills, achievements. Everyone perceives the world in their own way. In order to notice your uniqueness and enjoy it every day, write down on a piece of paper everything that you think is the best in yourself. It can be beautiful eyes or certain professional achievements ("I have a lot of experience in a certain field"), as well as character traits ("responsive", "I can listen"). If you think about something you don't like, do not write it down. Do not limit yourself to one day, constantly re-read and add to the list.
You can also ask your loved ones and relatives about how and in what situation they could turn to you as a specialist, a person with experience. Write it down and read it periodically. This will give you confidence and peace of mind that there are people to turn to for support.
4. Find what gives you strength and confidence.
Perhaps this is a yoga class or a walk along the promenade, or maybe these are minutes spent reading your favorite book, or just pleasant memorieswhich fill you with a sense of satisfaction, after which you feel a surge of strength and joy.
Fill your life with colors. Don't leave the gilded service for the holidays, get it out and use it every day, enjoying its beauty.
Also, psychologists advise you to develop what gives you strength and confidence. If you are not taught foreign languages \u200b\u200b(and you have already enrolled in foreign language courses) and at the same time you are in a depressed state, the successes of others can only aggravate your condition. Instead, focus on what works best for you. Awareness of your own mastery strengthens self-confidence due to the positive emotions that you experience (pride, joy, lightness of mind).
5. Preserve and emphasize your uniqueness.
You don't need to drown in your husband's problems and caring for children. You can love a person, perform various "feats" for him and get pleasure from it, but you cannot live for him, and he cannot live for you. Your loved one loved you for who you are, do not lose your uniqueness and individuality.
Now you know how to raise a woman's self-esteem! If you have your own ways, then share them in the comments!
Video of a professional psychologist on how to increase self-esteem. Where do legs grow from and how to deal with it?
Hello! In this article, we'll talk about how to boost your self-esteem and self-confidence!
Each person is different. It consists of a large number advantages and disadvantages. But all people treat themselves differently. It's all about self-esteem. For most people, it is very underestimated, and this becomes main reason many problems. Let's take a closer look at what the concept of "self-esteem" means, why it is underestimated, what this problem can lead to and how to raise self-confidence.
What is self-esteem? Her levels
There are several definitions of this concept, but the following is the simplest and most understandable.
Self-esteem is a person's attitude to himself. It can be overestimated, normal and underestimated.
Inflated self-esteem people who exalt their skills, human qualities, talents, physical capabilities and so on. Most often these are "daffodils" who do not have outstanding capabilities. They simply cannot adequately assess themselves, therefore they consider themselves better than others.
Adequate self-esteem occurs in people who really assess their strengths and skills. They understand that in addition to advantages, they also have disadvantages. But they do not focus on failure, but confidently walk through life, achieving their goal.
Low self-esteem not uncommon in modern society... People with such self-esteem cannot adequately assess all their abilities and consider themselves worse than others, constantly create complexes and fears for themselves. These are pessimists who do not believe in themselves, constantly complain about life and do not know how to overcome self-doubt.
Self-assessment tests
In order to find out at what level your self-esteem is, we suggest passing some simple tests.
Self-assessment test # 1
Try to quickly, without hesitation, answer the following questions. Answer only "Yes" or "No". Then count the total number of positive and negative responses.
- Do you often scold yourself for your mistakes?
- Do you gossip with your friends when discussing others?
- You are missing clear goals and plans for life?
- Don't go to the gym and neglect physical activity?
- Do you often worry about trifles?
- When you find yourself in an unfamiliar company, do you try not to stand out and be invisible?
- When you meet someone of the opposite sex, do you know how to maintain a conversation?
- Is your criticism causing depression?
- Do you envy the success of others?
- Are you hurt by careless words spoken to you?
Test result:
If you answered “Yes” 1 to 3 times, then you have normal self-esteem.
If you answered “Yes” more than 3 times, it means that you are a person with low self-esteem.
Self-assessment test # 2
Count the points earned for each question. After passing the test, add up all the numbers obtained and compare them with the results.
- Do you often think and reproach yourself for some actions or statements?
Often - 1 point;
Sometimes - 3 points .
- How do you behave when dealing with witty people?
You try to surpass them in wit - 5 points;
You try to stop communication as soon as possible - 1 point;
- Which statement is closer to you?
“Luck is the result of actions and works of each person” - 5 points;
“Luck is unpredictable” - 1 point;
“A person should rely only on himself and not on gifts of fate” - 3 points.
- If you were presented with a cartoon, what are your actions?
You will be delighted with the gift - 3 points;
Be offended - 1 point;
Take this idea into service and make a similar surprise to your friend - 4 points;
- Are you running out of time?
Yes - 1 point;
No - 5 points;
I don’t know - 3 points.
- Choosing perfume as a gift you:
- Have you imagined yourself as another person?
Yes - 1 point;
No - 5 points;
I don’t know - 3 points.
Test results:
If you scored 10-23 points, then you have low self-esteem. You often express dissatisfaction with yourself. You should consider how to increase your self-esteem.
A score of 24-37 points indicates that you harmonious personality... You know how to praise yourself and adequately treat all your mistakes.
If you scored 38-50 points, this means that you are a confident person, but sometimes you are self-critical.
If, after passing the tests, you want to learn how to love yourself and increase your self-esteem, you need to comprehensively study your psyche.
At first glance, self-esteem is a fairly simple concept that does not imply any complications. In fact, self-esteem is the starting point in personality formation. It has a number of functions:
- Protective... A morally stable person who is confident in his strengths and abilities is absolutely not interested in what others think of him. High self-esteem allows you to be stable and independent of the opinions of other people;
- Regulatory... Man with normal level self-esteem independently makes personal decisions. He understands that his life depends only on his decisions and actions;
- Developing... A self-sufficient person is interested in his further development... He longs for new knowledge and is constantly improving.
Why low self-esteem needs to be corrected
Perhaps people who have similar problems will disagree with the fact that something needs to be changed in life. Of course, it is easier to sit, do nothing, suffer and chastise everyone for the failures in your life.
But people with low self-esteem and self-doubt rarely achieve what they want in life, occupy lower positions, and have a minimum wage. Maybe they dream of earning several times more, being self-sufficient.
But for this you need to make important decisions, be confident in yourself, have a goal and try to achieve it. An insecure person will never become a leader, and the business he created is almost doomed to.
If you want to become a happy and financially independent person, then you need to urgently correct your psycho-emotional state and learn more about how to love yourself.
Reasons for low self-esteem
Our attitude towards ourselves is formed back in early childhood. A lot important role the parents play it.
If the kid is constantly reproached, scolded, told that he is bad, and, for example, Petya is good, then the child feels that he is worse than others. It seems to parents that they are thus raising their child, but in fact they cripple his psyche and make him a failure in life.
In addition to the parents, the environment also leaves its mark on the child's self-esteem. If the baby is in kindergarten or school is offended by peers, he closes, withdraws into himself and begins to hate everything around.
Also the reason bad attitude to oneself can become a physical inferiority, or defects in development. For example, if a child wears glasses, they are more likely to be teased by other children. Parents in this case must compensate for this shortcoming.
For example, if the child is full, then you can give it to sports section fight. There he will develop physically, acquire the skill of self-defense and be able to prove in practice that he is not weak and can stand up for himself.
There are many factors that influence the formation of self-esteem. And also the reasons for low self-esteem can be:
- Improper upbringing;
- Constant failure at an early age;
- Wrong goal setting;
- Unhealthy environment, etc.
It is very easy to notice a person who is insecure about himself. Psychology experts identify several signs of low self-esteem. Such an individual:
- Constantly criticizes himself and expresses dissatisfaction with himself;
- Listens to the opinions and criticism of others, which is why he suffers greatly;
- There is indecision in actions, afraid of doing something wrong and making a mistake;
- Unbridled jealousy;
- Feels jealous of other people's achievements and successes;
- Tries to please everyone and everyone;
- Hostile to all the people around him;
- Does not defend his point of view, constantly takes a defensive position and justifies himself;
- Possesses a pessimistic attitude and negatively perceives reality.
An individual with low self-esteem is constantly looking for problems, blames everyone and does not know how to enjoy life. This attitude towards yourself can lead to serious mental illness and lingering depression.
If you have at least three of the above signs, then you should think about how to believe in yourself.
Signs of high self-esteem
People with high or normal self-esteem are more successful, cheerful and optimistic. A person who adequately evaluates himself has the following features:
- Takes its physical and physical appearance as it really is;
- Confident in himself and his strength;
- She is not afraid to make mistakes, but she takes any troubles as an important lesson;
- Reacts adequately to criticism and praise;
- Finds mutual language with people. Knows how to behave in society;
- Understands that everyone has their own opinion, respects everyone's choice, but defends own point vision;
- Controls his physical and emotional state;
- Constantly improving and developing;
- Achieves the set goals.
It is impossible to live without faith in yourself full life, enjoy every day and be a successful person... If you set yourself certain goals and want to change any side of your life, then you will have to change your attitude towards yourself.
It is possible and necessary to raise self-esteem. Your future depends on it. If you still doubt this, then you should know that most suicides are carried out by people with low self-esteem. Therefore, do not be lazy, learn all the ways to increase your self-esteem and start working on yourself.
Learn to set achievable and realistic goals
People who don't believe in themselves often set themselves unattainable goals. And they shrug their shoulders at the top and say: “I knew that I wouldn’t succeed”. You need to try to look at things realistically and set realistic goals for yourself.
For example, you want to become famous fashion designer, but you can neither sew nor draw. In this case, you need to break one big dream into several small ones and gradually realize them. Sign up for a sewing and sewing course, and when you finish, take a drawing course. With minimal knowledge, it will be easier for you to succeed.
Refuse criticism
Stop constantly criticizing yourself and listen less to the criticism of others. Do not ask people for their opinion about your action, the work done, etc. If someone decides to express their opinion about you, it is better to ask culturally not to do so.
Try to eradicate dependence on public opinion.
Stop comparing yourself to others
Each person is individual and unique. Someone writes poetry, but does not know how to draw, and artists are not strong in mathematical sciences. Do not beat yourself up for doing something worse than others and stop constantly comparing yourself.
Realize that you are a unique person with your own set of talents.
Insecure people don't believe they can do good. Therefore, praise can be perceived as mockery or ridicule. Never say that your work done is a trifle. When you are being praised, keep your eyes on, hold your gaze and just say "Thank you."
Don't make excuses
Never make excuses or blame yourself for what happened. What has been done has already been done. If, for example, an act has negative consequences, it is better to take a lesson from this and not make similar mistakes in the future.
Learn to ask for help
Many people are afraid and do not dare to ask for help from colleagues, friends or acquaintances. They think that their ignorance or inability to do something can cause ridicule and bullying. In fact, no one can know and be able to do everything in the world. Asking for help is not at all shameful.
Communicate more often with loved ones and people who love you
In case of failure or any trouble, do not keep everything to yourself. Communicate with relatives more often, because they, like no one, believe in you, approve of most actions and always support.
In the case of a blues, do not withdraw into yourself, but just call your parents, and they will find the right wordsto support you.
Follow your business to the end
Be responsible for every undertaking. Complete everything, even small things. Do not put them off "for later", because most likely they will remain unfulfilled.
Learn to love your body
Each person has both advantages and disadvantages. Learn to hide flaws and highlight your strengths. For example, if you need to increase self-esteem and self-confidence in a woman who has broad shoulders, it is enough to choose the right cut of clothes and others will not notice this flaw. At the same time, you need to draw the attention of others to your strengths, eg, beautiful legs... Don't focus on negative qualities, better learn to love yourself for a huge number of virtues.
Exercise and maintain a healthy lifestyle
Everyone knows that in healthy body healthy mind... People who care about their health very rarely have low self-esteem. This is due at least to the fact that during sports, the hormone of joy is produced, you feel satisfied and easy.
Leading active image life, eating right, you adjust your figure, you start to like yourself, and this helps to love yourself and increase self-esteem.
Watch your appearance
If a person does not follow his hairstyle, manicure, condition of clothes, etc., then everyone, and he in particular, is disgusted with the created image. The sight of a sloppy person is repulsive.
But if you go to a hairdresser, put on ironed clothes and use good perfumesthen your shoulders will straighten on their own and you will feel the confidence that will appear.
Get rid of bad habits
Insecure people very often relieve stress with cigarettes and alcohol. Under the influence of alcohol, the problems do not seem so big, and life is easier. But when morning comes, you understand that the difficulties have not disappeared and they must be overcome.
Do not waste your time on smoke breaks and constant binges. So you ruin your body and postpone solving problems. When you throw at least one bad habit, then you will definitely gain faith in yourself.
Connect with optimists and successful people
A big imprint on our psyche and habits is imposed by the circle of people with whom we communicate. We adopt each other's habits, thereby trying to imitate someone.
If you are surrounded by people who are constantly unhappy with everything and have a pessimistic attitude, then sooner or later you will fall into depression.
Avoid the company of whiners and try to communicate with cheerful people who will charge you with positivity, instill confidence in yourself and push you to achieve new goals.
Visit psychologists, trainings
If you are sure that you cannot cope with the problem of low self-esteem on your own, then you can turn to the advice of a psychologist. A specialist will teach you to love yourself.
In parallel with this, you can attend several trainings aimed at increasing self-esteem. It will be at least interesting, as useful as possible.
Listen to affirmations
Remember the movie "The Most Charming and Attractive". There main characterstanding in front of the mirror, she repeated the words about how beautiful she is and how men like her. In this way, she increased her self-esteem by constantly repeating affirmations.
Affirmation - small text, which is repeated or listened to by people to increase self-esteem.
Try it yourself. For example, learn the phrase “I am a successful person. I will achieve all my goals ”and repeat it constantly. You can also record it on a digital medium (flash drive, disk, etc.) and constantly listen to it.
After a while you will forget what it is low level self-esteem.
Learn to step out of your comfort zone
People who are insecure try to be invisible. It is very difficult for them to perform new job, errands or just meet unknown people.
If you plan to become a successful person and then start doing things that are unusual for you. Take on the tasks that you previously avoided. For example, if you are planning a New Year's corporate party, and no one agrees to the role of Santa Claus, propose your candidacy. Thus, you will get rid of the fear of public speaking and leave your "comfort zone".
Read positive literature
Give preference to books with a good ending. After reading the next fairy tale novel, you will believe that sometimes this happens in life.
Find your dream job
Every person has favorite hobby... But more often the citizens of our country choose a profession not because of their heart, but according to their salary. Therefore, the work performed does not bring the desired satisfaction, and this can lead to low self-esteem.
In order to raise self-confidence in a man, it is necessary to change the profession, and if this is not possible, then you can try to pay maximum attention to some hobby. Doing what you love gives you faith, because it's nice to do what you do well.
Learn to give yourself to others
Whenever possible, be sure to help your friends, relatives and little-known people. If they ask for help, then they believe that you can help. Perhaps their faith will raise your self-esteem.
Live desires
Successful and self-confident people constantly desire and achieve more. Try it and you will constantly want something and do everything to achieve it. After the desires are achieved, you will realize that everything is working out for you, and you can do whatever you want.
Envy is not the most best quality human. She makes us compare ourselves to someone else. Never envy anyone, but rejoice at what you have.
Do not intrude, do not be hypocritical and do not fake
These three qualities prevent a person from having adequate self-esteem... If a colleague does not want to closely communicate with you, you should not impose. Find many benefits in this. Do not curry favor with people, so you put yourself below someone.
Discard laziness
When a person is lazy, he easily gets depressed. Of course, we are not encouraging you to work constantly. Just learn to distinguish laziness from relaxation.
If it's hard for you to overcome idleness, then, against your will, start doing the planned work, and the desire will come to you a little later.
Take action!
The longer you lie on the couch and dream of a bright future, the further it moves away from you. Start changing yourself and your worldview now. You don't have to wait for tomorrow, Monday or the start of a new month. Take action immediately!
Self-esteem techniques and techniques
Psychologists recommend the following exercises for people with low self-esteem.
List your positive qualities
People with low self-esteem are not used to talking and thinking well of themselves. They will more easily find 100 disadvantages in themselves than several advantages. But every person has a lot of positive qualities.
In order to understand this, take a piece of paper and write down all your merits. For example, you bake the most delicious pies, you can fix any household item you have beautiful hair, long eyelashes, thin waist etc. During the day, add new advantages to the list, and then attach it in a prominent place (for example, on the refrigerator) and review it regularly.
Keep a Success Diary
This method is very similar to the previous one. Only now you will have to write down your successes and achievements every day, in the allotted notebook. For example, they gave alms to a needy person, helped a child solve a problem, prepared a very delicious dinner, helped my wife to make purchases, etc.
This method will help increase your self-esteem through a visual achievement list.
Amulet
People have a lot of fears. But every day everyone has to overcome them. If you can't do this, try to find an amulet for yourself. It can be any item (for example, a coin, small toy, etc.) Magical properties she is unlikely to have, but you must believe that the amulet will help you and protect you from trouble.
So, overcoming fear and self-doubt, you will achieve your goal, and any achievements have a beneficial effect on the human psyche.
Actor
Even if you don't feel happy, try to play the role of a cheerful and carefree person. Imagine that you are an actor who has been assigned an important role and you need to get used to the character. Very soon, you will notice that you have stopped playing the role, and you really feel more successful and happier.
This method aims to overcome fears. If you are a shy student and don't like to speak in public, ask for an assignment for yourself that involves speaking in public. Submit your candidacy as the main character theatrical performance, or start writing a report, which you will successfully read at an open seminar.
Leaving the "comfort zone", you get rid of fears, thereby gaining self-confidence.
Clown
If you feel inferior, you are confident that you look bad and try not to attract special attention, then this method is for you.
Dress very bright and tasteless like a clown. Put on provocative makeup, wear pants and a skirt, put on curlers on your head, or winter hat summer and go to the store. Ignore the surprised looks of passers-by. This leaves you in your comfort zone.
After you reincarnate again into your everyday look sure to become confident / confident and boost your self-esteem.
Conclusion
Low self-esteem is psychological condition person who needs adjustment. People without faith in themselves are unhappy in 99% of cases. They are a gray mass that lives its life thoughtlessly. Few people want to communicate with this category of people. That is why a person with low self-esteem is withdrawn and has practically no friends.
In order to correct the situation, you must:
- Believe in yourself;
- Learn to set goals and achieve them;
- Get out of the "comfort zone";
- Communicate with successful and cheerful people;
- Develop mental and physical capabilities.
If you take all the advice and do all the exercises, then you will definitely achieve great heights in life. And remember the expression that others treat us the way we treat ourselves.
If the mother shows sensitivity and understanding, then she will be able to help her daughter increase her self-esteem.
How to do it? American psychologists who specialize in working with adolescents give 12 simple tips.
1. Acceptance of your body.
Mom often does not realize how much influence she has on her daughter's acceptance or rejection of her body.
Never ask your daughter if jeans make you fat; don't say you were bad because you ate a slice of pizza and now you have to give up dessert.
A mother's self-esteem affects her daughter's self-esteem.
2. Media literacy.
Teach your daughter media literacy. How to do it? Watch TV together, discuss what you saw. Help her work out critical glance, which will help her not to take all the information on faith.
Encourage her to do what she wants and what she needs. Create opportunities for her to speak up. Ask what she wants, let her make a choice, and then fulfill it in life. This is very important for improving the girl's self-esteem.
4. Team sports.
Research shows that girls who play in teams have a better sense of dignity... They interact with each other, see a worthy example in front of them, and they do not need to assert themselves at the expense of something else.
5. Don't lend your daughter's clothes.
You have to let her have her own style. It is very difficult to maintain your self-esteem at the proper level when your mother is, by conventional standards, both prettier and slimmer than you.
6. Move away from praise for appearance.
This also applies to talking with little girls. Try to balance compliments about the girl's appearance with compliments to who she is and what she does in the world.
For every compliment made to a daughter's appearance, there should be at least two that are not related to her. The same goes for other girls who come your way: your daughter's friends, nieces, etc.
7. Help to acquire skills that do not depend on appearance.
Engage her in activities that build confidence, rather than focus on good shape and the acquisition of things.
Sports, theater, music, art - all of this can really help girls express themselves through words, creativity, and not through their appearance.
8. Praise your daughter for her efforts, not her performance.
Shift the focus from results to effort and skill development. Mastery builds self-confidence and teaches us to calmly accept failure.
9. Pay attention to the magazines that are in your home.
Research shows that after 15 minutes of viewing fashion magazine, the mood goes from curiosity and enthusiasm to self-comparison and low self-esteem.
10. Do not discuss other women.
And don't let the boys and men in your family do this. Don't let kids tease each other about food or appearance. Don't let this take root in your home. This is really harmful.
11. Dad, don't treat your daughter as helpless.
When a father treats his daughter as a fragile, defenseless, little creature, he seems to say: "Your job is to look good, and the man will sweep everything in his path and save you."
Instead of giving her the ability and the tools to do something on her own, so that she speaks for herself. You can do the same things with your daughter as you would with your son.
12. Make sure she knows that you love her no matter what.
She needs to know that you will love her, no matter how her appearance changes, how she dresses or how she behaves. Because, although adolescents depend on the opinions of their peers, what their parents think of them is more important to them than ever.
Lifehacker has collected five tips that will open your eyes to a lot and help you improve your beloved's opinion of yourself.
1. Stop thinking of yourself as "just a woman"
Society inspires us with the idea that women are inconsistent, cannot find themselves, and therefore at work, many feel like impostors, claiming to be someone else's breadwinner. At home, women suffer from the fact that, due to their employment, they cannot devote enough time to "truly female" affairs: creating comfort, caring for children, and so on.
This confusion in social roles, the impossibility of being torn between diametrically opposed statuses of "purposeful Amazon" for colleagues and business partners and "affectionate domestic cat" for husband and children leads to the fact that a woman loses confidence in herself, begins to doubt her own abilities.
At first glance, everything is so. Indeed, a woman has many reasons for doubt. But important nuance lies in the fact that men have no less such reasons.
There is no evidence that women suffer from low self-esteem more often than men.
3. Use popular techniques to boost self-esteem
Both sexes can effectively use universal recommendations to develop self-love:
In addition to them, you can also concentrate on methods that take into account physical and psychological characteristics namely women.
Find a comfortable way to appear taller
“Look down” is not just a common phrase about snobbery. This is one of the principles on which they work social relations: high growth we subconsciously perceive it as one of the signs of a leader. For example, you can read a detailed article by the authoritative American edition of Business Insider on this subject: it contains the benefits that a person receives from growth. Subconscious perception shapes reality, and if you feel physically superior to those around you, your self-esteem also rises.
It is relatively easy for a woman to feel "grander" if she puts on her shoes. high heels or a platform, or at least raise the seat of an office chair higher in order to rise above the counterpart during negotiations. Yes, it can have a positive effect to increase growth too.
Watch your posture
A straight back renders powerful influence on behavior and self-perception. The reason is in many ways: a raised chin and straightened shoulders trigger the release of testosterone - a "masculine" hormone that gives assertiveness and self-confidence. In addition, proud posture reduces stress levels and reduces anxiety.
Gesture
Confidence is often related to how much space we take up in space. Remember wildlife: Large dominant beasts move with sweeping and imposing movements. But those who are hunted, on the contrary, try to be as small and invisible as possible. Gesturing during a conversation helps to expand the space that you occupy. As a result, you will feel more freedom and self-confidence.
If you are not used to gesturing, it is worth practicing in front of a mirror to find exactly those movements that will look as natural as possible.
Don't cross your arms over your chest
This closed pose is also a way to seem small and inconspicuous, therefore, a person who has closed his hands from the world is perceived by others as weak. And he himself begins to feel that way.
If during a conversation you do not know where to put your hands, rest them on your sides: place your palms on your waist, bending your elbows. it open posethat exudes confidence.
Don't be afraid to laugh at your mistakes
Insecure people tend to make excuses or hide mistakes. Confident people know how to take responsibility for their decisions, both good and bad. To say “Yes, I was wrong here, next time I will have to act differently” is actually much easier than it seems. And this is how others define a psychologically strong person.
Ask yourself the question "So what?"
Often we are afraid of some things that do not really have meaningful consequences. To sober yourself up in such moments, it is useful to ask the question "So what?" For instance:
- "I want to voice it, but what if other people don't support me?" - So what?
- "I would like to go to this event, but I hardly know anyone there ..." - so what?
- “I can forget what to say next during the presentation” - so what?
This simplest express self-analysis allows you to understand: even in the most negative scenario, nothing terrible will happen to you. So, you can safely act.
Find an object to follow
Among the people around you, there are likely to be those who demonstrate confident behavior and high self-esteem... Take a closer look at them. Try to act like them. This is one of the options for adopting successful life principles and “copy” the desired level of confidence.
4. Do what you like
Doing what you love is one of the most effective ways to raise self-esteem. The hardest part here is finding the one you really like.
5. Be active
There is a very popular version that low self-esteem is a peculiar form of passive aggression Causes of Passive-Aggressive Behavior... Someone says: "I do not want!", "I will not!" And someone is afraid to voice their refusal aloud, and then it sounds: "I can't, I'm just small and weak." Not believing in yourself is often just a way to justify your own inactivity, to blame others. But this method is destructive.
Low self-esteem is only cured by action. Action (even through fear) → success (even after one or two not very successful attempts) → increased self-confidence and self-confidence. This is the most effective medicine from self-dislike.