Norway family. How it all works: Norwegian family traditions. Family Institute in Norway

24.09.2019

Norway is one of the countries of the Scandinavian Peninsula, washed by the Arctic Ocean. However, in addition to the mainland, it includes 50,000 nearby islands.

Norway is a country of fabulous beauty, its nature seems to have retained its original appearance. Mountains covered with dense forests, bays (fjords) and secluded bays attract thousands of tourists from all over the world.

The weather in Norway is very changeable. Despite the fact that, according to statistics, winter is always severe, and summer, on the contrary, is very hot, during the day, both in winter and in summer, the weather can change dramatically and more than once. The Norwegians even have a saying:

"Don't like our weather? Wait 15 minutes."

Although Norway is often referred to as the "land of the Vikings", today it is the safest and most peaceful country in the world.

Norway is the least populated European country. On average, 12 km² of land is calculated per inhabitant.
In Norway, it is customary to follow the law, so most Norwegians do not lock their houses with a key, and in supermarkets there are no video cameras and detector frames to check customers, with rare exceptions.
The average working day in Norway is from 10:00 to 16:00, from Monday to Friday.
In Norway, a special wedding tradition is popular - drinking cows with beer during the celebration. It is customary among Norwegians that at the wedding everyone, without exception, be drunk.

Norwegians are fluent in English and on television most programs are broadcast only in English, though with Norwegian subtitles.
Norway has very high electricity tariffs. A family of 4 pays an average of €1,000 for electricity.
In Norway, which has forest resources, there is no felling of trees at all.
Norwegians are true patriots. Flags of the country are hung on most houses, the flag is removed upon departure, and returned to its place upon arrival.

Murder and robbery in Norway is considered a national emergency, as such cases are rare. Also in the country is the most comfortable prison in the world, in the cell of which there is a shower and an LCD TV.
Despite the changeable weather conditions, the most popular form of transport in Norway remains the bicycle.

Traditions and customs of the indigenous population

Norway has preserved a large number of customs and traditions that are still relevant today. Norwegians are kind to them and pass them on from generation to generation, instilling in their children their culture of communication and rules of conduct.
Norwegians don't hug when they meet. They either shake hands or just touch their fingers as a sign of greeting. When it's time to disperse, Norwegians traditionally pat each other on the shoulder.
The royal family of Norway enjoys undeniable authority, so it is not customary in the country to joke about them. Even harmless irony towards monarchs is perceived as bad form.

Family traditions in Norway are as follows: housework is not divided into women's and men's. Also, the father also receives parental leave in the first month of his birth, so both parents devote the first 4 weeks to the newborn all the time.
Smoking is prohibited in public places in Norway. In hotels and hotels, exactly half of the rooms are prepared specifically for non-smokers. Norwegians are generally big adherents of a healthy lifestyle and the preservation of the environment in the country.
In public transport in Norway, it is not customary to give up your seat to older people; they will rather regard this as an insult than as a sign of attention.

In Norway, it is not customary to flaunt your income. Wealthy people do not build mansions and do not buy yachts, there are not a lot of luxury cars on the roads. By clothing and appearance, it is impossible to divide people by income level.
Each city (county) in Norway honors its own "cultural features" that distinguish it from neighboring cities. For example, these features include national costumes, individual for each district. Norwegians use them at weddings, big holidays and traditional ceremonies.

Family Traditions in Norway

The man during the woman's pregnancy is not on the sidelines, but participates in the process of preparing for the birth of a child: the couple visits doctors together, the husband is present at the birth. Also in Norway it is not customary to hide pregnancy, the young are even congratulated in advance, bringing with them a dowry for the baby. The hospital also has a special tradition of congratulating young parents after childbirth: candles and the flag of Norway are brought into the ward.

When raising children, there is no gender separation. In stores you can not find a toy "for boys" and "for girls". The phrases traditional in Russia used for education are also missing. For example, there is no concept “Be a man!”, “Girls don’t behave like that!”, “You’re a boy, you can’t cry!”. Such upbringing leaves an imprint on the choice of children when they grow up. Women and men have equal rights in choosing a profession or hobby.

The traditional role of grandparents in Russia is also different in Norway, and comes down to expensive gifts on holidays and infrequent visits. The position of the Norwegians is such that young parents should learn to cope with their responsibilities on their own, without shifting them to their parents, who, by the way, work on average up to 70 years.

Norwegians are not superstitious. Their mentality lacks the traditional Russian concepts of “sit on the path” or “knock on wood”. Norwegians have the same attitude towards gifts that are not capable of evoking unpleasant associations in them.

Festive customs in Norway

The most popular national holiday in Norway is Constitution Day. It falls on May 17th. On this day, the Norwegians arrange a mass procession to the Royal Palace. The first column is schoolchildren in distinctive costumes, followed by local residents.

The most favorite holidays of Norwegians are Christmas and Easter, St. Hans' day is also popular.

Before Christmas, the feast of St. Lucia takes place, for the role of which the inhabitants choose the most beautiful girl in the country. Preparing for Christmas takes place in a manner similar to many countries: gifts are bought, a Christmas tree is decorated, festive bread is baked. A baked pig is traditionally served on the table on a holiday.

On New Year's Eve, the custom is still popular to dress up and then walk around the city in this form. At the head of the procession is a boy dressed as a straw man.

Easter for Norwegians is a purely domestic holiday, to which it is customary to invite many guests. The celebration takes place over 2 days.

And the day of St. Hans is accompanied by interesting customs: girls wear wreaths of flowers on their heads, and in the evening young people arrange a holiday with round dances and jumping over a fire.

Norway through the eyes of a Russian

The question of how comfortable the “country of the Vikings” is for a Russian person for life and travel remains open. Below are facts about Norway that will be of interest to a Russian, given the difference in mentality:

There are not so many entertainments in Norway that are familiar to the average Russian. And the capital of Norway - Oslo - is calmer and more measured than most cities in Russia.
In Norway, there is practically no "comfortable" vacation, which distinguishes the Mediterranean.
The sale of hard liquor is strictly controlled by the state.
The traditional Norwegian clothing style is sporty. It is not customary to pay much attention to clothing and its neatness.

Norwegian society today has a greater bias towards matriarchy than towards the traditional patriarchy for Russians.
In Norway, children are so protected that parents can be deprived of parental rights for any manifestation of anger towards them, if this incident is regarded as excessive rudeness.
Recently, Norway has been populated by refugees, like most Western countries, which leaves an imprint on its modern culture.
Salaries in Norway are really big, €5000-7000 per month. However, a third of the income goes to pay taxes and utilities.

Therefore, although Norway leads the list of the most favorable countries for living, not every Russian will feel comfortable in it when it comes to moving. But the stunning views of virgin nature and the historical value of these places are worth it to visit the "land of the Vikings" at least once in a lifetime.

Elena Benshin has been living in Norway for many years. She spoke about how families live in this country, what are the traditions of raising children in the northern kingdom.
childbirth
In Norway, the natural approach is universally preached: it is believed that pregnancy is not a disease, but the natural state of a woman. At the same time, the support of the father throughout all nine months is considered necessary: couples go to the doctor together, and the husband is almost always present at childbirth. In some ways, this is a modern trend, because Norway has long been a rather poor fishing country. In simple families, a man was more often at sea than at home. Therefore, the woman coped with household duties, with pregnancy, with children herself.

There are no taboos regarding the age at which a child can be shown. Relatives, friends, colleagues come to see the newborn almost immediately. Similarly, it is not customary to hide pregnancy. The fact that an addition is expected in the family becomes known to everyone around the twelfth week. Contrary to tradition in Russia, in Norway you can give gifts in advance. Therefore, the dowry for the child is collected little by little, starting from the first weeks of pregnancy. At the same time, relatives and friends are usually very actively involved in this wonderful process, so by the time the child is born, enough things are being collected.
In the hospital, the medical staff usually congratulates the parents in a downright romantic setting. They bring candles and put the Norwegian flag on the table.
Upbringing
The traditions of family education in Norway rather depend on the region and the environment in which the family lives. In each region of this actually small country, people speak their own dialect, which is often not understood by those who come from another area. What can we say about traditions, even if the language differs so much. Fishermen, farmers and white-collar workers, of course, raise their children in different ways.

And yet there are moments that can be called common. Modern Norwegian parents rarely keep their children strict. Few of the mothers and fathers will scold children, forbid or call for order. Rather the opposite. It comes to the fact that educators in kindergartens and teachers in schools are asked to be stricter with children.
One of the main values is family mutual assistance. Family is a common thing. So everyone has to contribute something to it. Parents take care of children, but children are also actively involved in many issues. For example, it is customary for elders to take care of younger brothers and sisters. And this is not just for girls. The brothers also take care of the younger ones, walk, look after. This is not considered shameful. Parents communicate with children on an equal footing. Adults can talk on various topics, including sensitive issues. It’s easier to explain once than to avoid answering for years. At the same time, there are traditional conversations about choosing a future life partner. Parents are unlikely to openly impose their will, but they will express their opinion.
Boys and girls
Emancipation and the struggle for equal rights left their mark on the upbringing of Norwegian boys and girls. Here they try to avoid any gender division in regard to children. In fact, there are no toys for boys and girls or male and female sports. Do what you want and play what you want if you like it. The same goes for choosing a profession. There is no male or female work. Can you do it? Work.
In Norway, it is impossible to hear phrases like: "Be a man!", "You're a girl, girls don't do that" or "This is not a job for girls", as well as "Men don't cry".

This equality responds differently in adulthood. On the one hand, it gives freedom. On the other hand, often from childhood, independent and emancipated Norwegian women take on all possible tasks and carry them out with heroic tenacity, without accepting anyone's help. Not every Norwegian woman will allow a man to open a door or carry a heavy bag. At the same time, there is no logical answer to the question, why not actually agree to help. Because in the minds of most girls since childhood there is simply no such category as male help. Everything is common, everything is the same. Sometimes it comes to situations on the verge of absurdity. Let me tell you about a situation in my life. New desktops come to the firm and instead of asking for help from men, who are in abundance in the office, women begin to carry the furniture themselves. They tear their backs and do not even think about the fact that men would do it faster, not to mention the fact that it is easier and better. When one of our compatriots decided, just for the sake of experiment, to ask for help, the Norwegian men let out a sigh of relief. They helped with great pleasure and continue to help. Although they often simply do not dare to offer help to their ladies.
However, this is only one side of the coin. It is sometimes said that Norway is a paradise for women. And this is also true. The fact is that there are fewer women than men. Therefore, almost any woman can find a companion if she wishes. What can not be said about men. This is especially true in rural areas. In a situation where there are 27 boys and 9 girls in a class of 36 children in a village school, it is not easy to find a girlfriend. Perspicacious parents conduct explanatory work with their sons from childhood. Set them up for tough competition. Some heartbreakers are such that the fight for them begins as early as kindergarten. Here is one of the real stories. The children were friends in kindergarten, then the "groom's" family moved, and he moved to another kindergarten. Despite this, his parents regularly brought him to visit his "beloved". And they were then three years old ... In some ways it's funny, but it clearly shows how seriously parents can take this issue. And although it is unlikely that it will be possible to “stake out” a girl in kindergarten, it is quite possible to instill perseverance in a boy.
The role of mom and dad
The role of parents has changed a lot. There is no longer an idea that chopping wood and pounding on the table is the role of a father, and cooking and pitying is the role of a mother. The father is so directly involved in pregnancy, childbirth, maternity leave (which is given to fathers along with mothers) that often there is no difference between parents in terms of raising or caring for children.
Grandmothers and grandfathers
Most Norwegian grandparents work until the age of 67. Therefore, they do not have many opportunities to take care of their grandchildren. The main policy of parents after the children have created their own family is not to interfere. Much of this applies to the upbringing of children. Newly minted parents should rely primarily on themselves. Of course, situations in life are different. If you need help, grandparents will help. But without a request, you should not expect that one of the older relatives will take the initiative himself.

Participation in the life of grandchildren mainly comes down to gifts, usually expensive, and family holidays. This does not mean that a child cannot just come to visit his grandparents. It's just that no one cultivates it as a system of constant babysitting. But in the grandmother's house, children are usually allowed everything. If you want - run, if you want - play, if you want to climb into your grandmother's chest of drawers or into the chicken coop, you are welcome both there and there.
Families are smaller now. But the generation of those who are now over 60, as a rule, has a large family. Grandmothers can have five, or six, or more brothers and sisters. As a rule, everyone keeps in touch and there is a tradition to arrange family conventions. Sometimes they even have to rent gyms in schools. Because relatives from all sides are recruited by 200 or more people. The event is very interesting. For the young, it is an opportunity to learn more about their family and roots; for the older ones, it is a chance to meet relatives who sometimes have not been seen for years.
superstition
It is very difficult for Norwegians to explain why they need to knock on wood, spit over their left shoulder, sit on the road or look in the mirror if they came back for something. For the most part, they do not attach importance to superstition. This also applies to gifts. Watches, knives and other "forbidden items" in Norway are given quite calmly. An even number of flowers in a bouquet also does not cause unpleasant associations for anyone. Here, in principle, no one will count the flowers in a vase or bouquet.
traditional
Most family traditions today are associated with holidays. And in many ways they do not coincide with what we are used to. The New Year, for example, is not particularly celebrated. It is rather an occasion to meet friends, go to a party, rather than a family celebration.

But Christmas is a real main family holiday. Preparation for it begins four weeks in advance, from the first Sunday of Advent (Christmas Lent). The tradition of observing fasts is long gone, but Advent has remained. During this period, everything is decorated in lilac-violet tones. Children receive Christmas calendars. Four candles are placed in special beautiful wreaths according to the number of Sundays left until Christmas.
This is the holiday time. A new candle is lit every week. At this time, children prepare Christmas gifts, not only at home, but also in schools and kindergartens. Christmas is preceded by a very beautiful feast of Saint Lucy. It is celebrated not only in Norway, but throughout Scandinavia. Protestants do not venerate saints. Saint Lucy's Day entered Sweden in a roundabout way and then spread to neighboring countries. Few people think about the meaning of the holiday itself. Saint Lucia was a Sicilian martyr who was blinded and killed for her faith in Christ. But there is also a legend that Lucia was the wife of a fisherman in Sweden. One night, when the husband was at sea, a storm broke out. The roaming evil spirits extinguished the lighthouse. Then Lucia went out to the rock with a lantern and showed the fishermen the way to the shore. With this, she angered the evil spirit. The devils attacked the girl and cut off her head. But even after that, the ghost of Lucia stood on a rock with a burning lamp, continuing to show the way to the house wandering in the sea. On St. Lucia's Day, girls dress in white, sing songs about Lucia, and treat everyone to saffron buns.
A couple of days before Christmas, decorations in houses change to red. Children attend churches, put together with teachers sketches about the birth of Christ. December 24 is a working day, but it ends early. By 12 noon everyone is already free and hurrying home. Gifts are laid out under the tree. The culmination of the holiday is a family dinner. Each region has its own menu for the holiday. The main dish can be smoked and then boiled lamb head, lamb ribs, steamed, pork ribs, fish. After dinner for children comes one of the happiest moments of the year. Gifts open! This solemn event is followed by the serving of dessert and long conversations in the family circle. During the Christmas holidays, relatives often meet for dinner or lunch.
In February, Mother's Day is traditionally celebrated, which usually falls on the second Sunday of the month. In a sense, this is an analogue of March 8, with the difference that children give gifts to mothers, and not husbands to wives. However, the father is usually involved in the selection of the gift and can sponsor it. On this day, the younger ones visit the older ones. Usually families gather at the grandparents' house for a family dinner. There is also a traditional Father's Day.

Spring starts with Easter. This holiday in Norway is not as noisy as Christmas. Again, decorations are being made in homes and public places. Yellow tones predominate. Bunnies, chickens, eggs are exhibited - everything that, in the concept of Norwegians, is connected with Easter. At the same time, eggs are rarely painted, and Easter cakes are not baked. But the whole family goes to the grill. Often at this time there is still snow on the street. But that doesn't bother anyone. The people en masse go to the ski track and massively "grill". Like, spring will come no matter what.
Perhaps the most important day for Norway is May 17, Constitution Day. For all its statehood, it has become quite popular and family. It was on May 17 that Norway ceased to be part of the Swedish-Norwegian union and became an independent state. On this day, it is customary to wear national costumes - bunads, which, by the way, cost (on average!) About 5 thousand dollars. However, most families have such costumes. The first bunad is usually put on for confirmation. This is another family tradition. Initially, confirmation (chrismation) is the confirmation of the choice of Christianity and the acceptance of the gifts of the Holy Spirit. Now this is a dedication to adulthood. It usually goes away by the age of 15. Be sure to gather all the relatives. A holiday is being arranged. The main gift for confirmation is money. So the youth begins to collect their first independent capital. So, the national costume purchased for confirmation is then put on for the holiday on May 17 without fail.

The celebration begins with a family breakfast. Be sure to decorate the house on this day with flowers in blue-white-red tones with ribbons in the color of the Norwegian flag. After a joint morning meal, you can watch a broadcast from Oslo and a greeting from the royal family. And then the time will come and go to the demonstration. Residents of each locality gather in the city center, marching through the streets to the cries of “Hip-hip hooray! Norge er sconce. Literally, it can be translated as “Hip-hip hooray! Norway is good! ("Long live Norway!").

In rural areas, the procession usually ends at the local school, where children sing the national anthem. This is followed by a small concert of a patriotic song performed by the same children and a joint lunch. The holiday continues in the family. The table for dinner is sure to be very beautifully decorated. Each region has its own traditional dish, which is usually eaten on May 17th. For example, sodd is a lamb and beef stew soup with meatballs and pieces of beef. Sodd is a thick dish, but served in a tureen. Boiled potatoes and carrots are served separately. Moreover, sodd on the menu always stands apart. It's not just a soup and it's not just a stew - it's a sodd. For dessert, traditional puddings, pies and homemade ice cream.

One of the family traditions of Norway, at least for the last few decades, can be considered a trip to the southern countries in the summer. Which is not surprising. Norwegians say that there are two winters in their country: white and green. Therefore, to warm up, you have to travel.
Some customs are associated with the traditional way of life. Previously, weekends were set aside specifically so that the family could harvest potatoes. Children helped adults, so schools also had holidays. This is an echo of the era when Norway was not yet an oil kingdom, and potatoes were the main “mineral resource” here. The week of autumn holidays is still popularly called "potato week".
Evgenia Rogacheva
The author thanks Elena Benshin for the provided photographs.

1. Norway allocates about a billion euros a year for the removal of children from families. Russians - first of all

The State Statistics Committee of Norway published on its official website information that the state annually allocates 8.8 billion crowns (44 billion rubles, or about 1 billion euros) for the maintenance of punishers from Barnevarn. The money goes primarily to encourage the forced separation of emigrant families and the alienation of parents from their own children, informs the press service of the Russian Mothers MOU.

Statistics on the foreign origin of children who fell under the forced guardianship of the punitive social patronage of Norway is given by the local Goskomstat once every five years. Norway openly published the latest data on countries of origin of prisoners as of January 1, 2010. On this day, 5176 Russian children were in the dungeons of Barnevarn.

Goskomstat notes that "Russian children" represent one of the largest groups in Barnevarne. At the same time, the number of Barnevarn's wards, who were born in Russia and were "imported" by their parents to Norway, is among the four leaders among all nationalities. But among the selected children born in Norway, "Russian children" are the absolute leaders and occupy the highest line in all tables about children who have become "clients" of the Norwegian children's police Barnevarn.

People are afraid of everything, afraid to go to bed, afraid to go to work, afraid to lose their children. At any time of the day or night, the children's police "Barnevarn" can descend on you and destroy your family forever and take your children away forever. This practice is widespread on an all-European scale of child hunting.

In Norway, the so-called socialists are trying to put into practice the idea that everyone should be the same. All children must go to kindergarten from the age of one, it is forbidden to sleep in kindergarten from the age of 3, and up to 3 years - sleeping in the garden is undesirable. In a Norwegian kindergarten, babies and children are fed once a week with a warm meal. Russian mothers are indignant and ask to increase the distribution of food to children in kindergartens up to two times a week. Norwegian educators, instead of food, take away children from Russian mothers who are dissatisfied with the regime. If the child is different from others, stands out from the crowd (even if shy, or restless), Barnevern is taken to work.

Socialists claim that it is easier to shape a small child than a teenager who is already spoiled. Therefore, the goal of Barnevarn is to take the child away from Russian mothers as early as possible, best of all - right on the day of birth or even at the time of birth. 1/5 of all children in Norway are currently under the jurisdiction of the state - that is, these are Barnevarn clients, juvenile clients. They are separated from their biological parents and live in juvenile institutions. Some call them foster families and orphanages, others - family-type juvenile prisons.

The Norwegian juvenile police Barnevarn pride themselves on seizing 1.5 children per hour from good parents in Norway.

2. The Norwegian guardianship service took the child from Russian citizen Svetlana Tarannikova on the second day after birth

The Norwegian guardianship service took the child from Russian citizen Svetlana Tarannikova on the second day after birth. As it turned out later, the foster mother had been "in line" for the baby for two years and she was promised Svetlana's child. Prior to that, two older sons had already been taken from the Russian woman.

Russian mothers become donors for Norwegian families who receive a lot of money for the adoption of migrant children. Such adaptation in Norwegian became a kind of state policy.

In 2003, Svetlana Tarannikova, a resident of Murmansk, married a Norwegian citizen, having moved to this country with her six-year-old son. But very soon it became clear that this marriage had no future. The husband turned out to be an alcoholic, who also drove large quantities of moonshine in the basement of his own house. As Svetlana says, she was afraid of the explosion of this meter apparatus and reported her husband to the police.

But it turned out that in Norway there is an organization that is much more powerful than the police - this is the local child protection service, or barnevarn, as it is called in Norwegian. In retaliation, the husband turned to this service, demanding that her son be taken away from Svetlana. As he later admitted, it is a common practice to take revenge on people by reporting them to the barn. Service specialists began to visit the woman regularly, write reports about her behavior, threatening to take the child away. Frightened by these threats, Svetlana chose to return to her husband.

She suddenly became pregnant. But the husband was categorically against this child. Realizing that Svetlana was not going to get rid of him, he once again declared her to the barn, this time accusing the woman of alcoholism. “The next day, barnevarn took her eldest son from school and took her to a secret address. They didn’t give me any news about my son for about three months - they just didn’t pick up the phone. And I was sent for examination to a special clinic. Tests showed the absence of alcohol.

But the staff also recommended an abortion because, knowing the barnevarn system, they feared for the health of the mother and child," says Svetlana. Since the woman refused an abortion, she was placed in a special institution where the barnevarn sends "problem" mothers. no possibility - otherwise the child is taken away immediately after birth.In addition, Svetlana was promised to return her eldest son.

“But when I arrived, I realized that I was placed in this institution only to pick up the child. Everyone there was looking for real or unreal reasons for this. No matter what I did, everything was used against me,” says Svetlana.

One example explains everything. Once a woman went for a walk with her eldest son and his 12-year-old friend. The next day, employees of the institution wrote in a report that she was "using her son to attract young fans." What a twisted mind you need to have to write something like this about a 30-year-old woman who is in the last stages of pregnancy. Reports of this kind were fabricated every day.

Not surprisingly, most of the women who entered this institution had their children eventually taken away. Well, mothers who lost their nerve after losing a child were sent for treatment to a psychiatric clinic.

The birth was difficult, but a week later Svetlana was ordered to get up and go skiing in the mountains. Her refusal, she was told, "would cause concern." As Svetlana says, "from their point of view, it appeared that a true Norwegian mother immediately after giving birth gets up on skis and goes to the mountains. If she does not go, then she is not able to raise a child."

In the end, the woman had a nervous breakdown, and she made a fatal mistake - she signed an agreement with barnevarn that she would give them children while she would restore her health. The agreement was drawn up as a temporary one, but it quickly became clear that no one was going to return her children. Some time later, Svetlana was announced that her two sons were being given to a lesbian family.

One can imagine the reaction of a woman brought up in traditional values - she was categorically against it. As it turned out later, this refusal was also used against her: is it possible to entrust children to a woman who has a negative attitude towards homosexuals? But what about tolerance and political correctness?

As a result, Svetlana was allowed to see the children only four times a year. To protect her maternal rights, she hired a lawyer. And he gave her unexpected advice - to give birth to another child, and then, it seems, there will be a chance to return older children. But, as it turned out, the fate of the third child had already been decided by the Norwegian guardianship service.

On the second day after the birth, the newborn girl was taken away from her mother - it later turned out that she had already been "booked" by one foster family, which had been in line for the baby for two years.

There is nothing surprising in the existence of such queues. Being foster parents in Norway is very profitable: for each child, the state pays from 300 to 500 thousand crowns per year (1.5-2.5 million rubles), plus 10 thousand crowns per month for everyday expenses. How much does a child need? It is clear that the main part of these amounts goes to the family income, which, moreover, is not subject to any tax at all. So, thanks to foster children, such a family becomes much more prosperous and can afford unplanned expenses.

But it would seem, what is the point for the state to take away children from their natural parents, who are completely law-abiding citizens and do not lead an asocial lifestyle, and then pay such big money to foster families? There is a meaning - and a very significant one. After all, children are taken away not only from Russian citizens. We have already told about a similar story with a Polish family who even had to hire a detective to steal their daughter from a foster family and bring her home.

In Norway, there is also an organization for the women of Somalia, which was created a few years ago by one of the mothers, who also lost her child with the light hand of barnevard employees. The mothers in this organization are fighting together to get their own children back. It seems that the Norwegian state has come up with an original way of "adaptation" of migrants. It was possible to follow the path of France, Germany, Great Britain and try to "integrate" adults into the existing state system. However, as sociological experience shows, this method has not been particularly successful in the above countries - migrants, even in the second and third generations, prefer to live within the framework of their compatriots, according to their cultural traditions.

The Norwegian authorities, on the other hand, invented a much more effective method - to take the child away from the biological parents and transfer it to the family of true Norwegians, thus eliminating the problem of adaptation and assimilation of foreign children by force. That is why the local guardianship service barnevarn makes a decision on the removal of children without waiting for a court order. This service has been given some incredible powers, and its employees are free to decide who is worthy of being a mother and who is not. Without the state "order" this would be simply impossible. At the same time, the requirements for adoptive parents are much softer than for relatives.

Irina Bergset, whose dramatic story Pravda.Ru has repeatedly told about, recently received her first meeting with her sons in two months. She was horrified to find a stitched wound on the forehead of her youngest son, an injured leg joint in her older son. On her complaint, she was told that there was nothing to worry about - everything was fine. The main thing is done - the children are transferred to a foster family, and there their problems no longer concern anyone.

But one more difficult question remains - the position of the Russian state. After all, most of these children were citizens of Russia. And after they are transferred to foster families, the children get a new passport and even change their names. The daughter of Svetlana Tarannikova is now being prepared for this kind of adaptation in order to completely cut off all ties with her own mother. There can be no talk of any upbringing, taking into account the native culture and language.

Does the Russian state really care to such an extent what happens to its young citizens in Norway, where they are forcibly made into Norwegians?

3. Norway: Russians are more likely to seize children

Norway has officially recognized that half of all children removed from families are children of emigrants who came to the country with their parents. Russia ranks fourth in this sad rating. But among those who were already born on the territory of Norway and were selected by local guardianship, most of all there were children whose one of the parents was a native of Russia.

Last Wednesday, several Russian women came to the Norwegian parliament in Oslo to hold a rally authorized by the authorities. Women silently stood at the walls of parliament with posters - "My children need me - my own mother." For the first time official figures were heard in the story about the picket on local television.

More than half of all children seized in Norway come from immigrant families. The first lines of the "top list" are occupied by people from Somalia, Iraq, Afghanistan and Russia. The Minister for Family Affairs and Child Protection acknowledged that these numbers are constantly growing. In 2007, the total number of children taken away from their natural parents was 7,709, in 2010 - 8,073, and in 2011 - 8,485. But according to local human rights activists, the real numbers could be several times higher.

For the children of immigrants from Russia, the situation is known so far only for the period of January 1, 2010 (the local committee on statistics summarizes it every five years). At that time, 5176 Russian children were in the guardianship system. The Norwegian State Statistics Committee notes that "Russian children" represent one of the largest groups among those seized from their parents. Among those who came to Norway with their parents, Russians rank fourth in terms of "popularity" with social services. But among those who were already born on the territory of Norway, the most children are taken away from whom one of the parents (usually the mother) is Russian.

True, the Norwegian Minister for Children himself does not see anything special in these statistics. And when asked to comment on the rally of mothers whose children were taken away, he said that this only indicates that there is democracy in Norway, and immigrant parents are not prohibited from organizing pickets. Yes, the majority of parents who have lost their children due to state kidnapping really have only one right left - to go to silent pickets with candles and posters.

Nothing can be proven in court. Simply because the claims that the local child protection service (Barnevarn) makes against foreign mothers do not fit in the head of an ordinary sane person.

Pravda.Ru told the story of Inga Eikevog, who lived with her husband in Norway for a month and a half with her child. Her words are a warning, what you should be prepared for. "My husband forbade me to walk with the child after 8 pm, although it was very light and completely safe. An explanation - this will attract the attention of Barnevarn. He also ordered me to curtain the windows so that the neighbors from the windows of the house opposite they did not see anything "wrong" in the way I feed the child and did not declare to Barnevarn. Do not change the diaper to the child without closing the curtains, as our baby does not like diapers, screams and dodges and his unwillingness to neighbors opposite or living through the wall could be regarded as my violence against him. I became afraid to be in an apartment without the blinds down, feed the child by the window, tried to go for a walk with the child as soon as possible so that his impatient cries would not interest the neighbors, "recalls Inga.

4. How Norway takes away children from visiting foreigners

1 (232x184, 18Kb) In principle, Indian culture is not capable of giving a child a happy childhood. This is the conclusion reached by the employees of the Norwegian social services for children, and therefore they decided to save two little Indian citizens from the prospect of returning to their homeland with their parents - highly qualified specialists who worked in Norway under a contract.

And the shock of the Indian society, the problems of the Norwegian business in India, the rivers of children's and parental tears - an insignificant price for representatives of the state machine, launched to build children's happiness in a single country. When parents drag their sleepy children to kindergartens in the morning, the corridors of these institutions are sure to resound with a roar. As a rule, for every dozen young Russian citizens there is at least one supporter of active methods of protest against early initiation into official discipline.

Russian nannies and educators know that almost every second child begins integration into society with a hunger strike and many hours of sit-in in the corner of the group, with the refusal of any negotiations before presenting their mother. In our kindergartens, the staff takes this behavior for granted. Perhaps this is precisely the anarchism of the Russian soul.

Not so in Norway, where much more attentive people take care of children. In a country where the rights of the child are protected by special legislation and a powerful bureaucratic machine, no three-year-old toddler should sit sadly away from the playing group of the kindergarten, with his forehead against the wall or floor. The child is obliged to be happy - and he will be, even if for this it is necessary to separate him from mom and dad forever. Do not cry, baby: the state knows better what you need.

It was in this story last spring that Indian citizen Abigyan Bhattacharya got involved for two and a half years, who lived with his parents and a four-month-old nursing sister in the Norwegian city of Stavanger. His separation from the team in the kindergarten was regarded as a sign of obvious trouble. And for every signal of this kind, the Norwegian social service for children must respond immediately.

The family of Anurup and Sagarika Bhattacharya was placed under the supervision prescribed by law. During the week, social workers visited the suspicious Indian family, observing her life. These were ethnographic observations based on qualitative material.

The surname Bhattacharya indicates belonging to the Brahmin caste (translated as "knowing the Vedic rituals"). No less noble is the maiden name of Sagariki - Chakraborty. But despite their noble background, Halliburton's senior geologist and his wife, who has an MBA degree, have not been able to live up to the high standards of Norwegian society.

To their dismay, social workers discovered that Indian parents took babies to bed, and the son even slept with his father in the same bed (one can imagine what associations arose in the minds of Norwegians deprived of oriental temperament). Sagarik's mother shocked social workers by feeding her eldest son not from a spoon, but simply from her hand. And the youngest daughter was applied to her breast not by the clock, but by the first squeak.

It was these issues of guardianship that Sagarika remembered later, trying to explain to reporters what exactly happened during these hours, such that the social authorities of Norway came to the conclusion that the Bhattacharya family was completely incapable of raising their children. True, much later, the head of the Norwegian social services for children, Gunnar Thoresen, denied that it was these habits of family life that caused such a tough decision. He officially refused to comment on the real motives. Not out of personal impudence, of course, but solely for the sake of observing the rule of law, which requires delicate silence from the ministers of childhood.

This is one of the main features of the child care system built in Norway. The Social Services for Children and Family Courts, like the Holy Inquisition once, are not subject to the profane judgment of the public. This is explained, of course, by protecting the interests of the children themselves. You never know what nightmarish details may come to the surface and affect the future of children? The public is left to believe in the word: if the guardianship decided that the horror took place, then it is so.

In the case of the Bhattacharya family, the Stavanger children's advocates were 100% sure they were right.

Overcoming the criminal indifference of the judicial system, they made every effort to save the unfortunate crumbs. When the family court of first instance reversed the decision to remove the children, social workers still did not return them to their parents, but filed an appeal. And the city family court of Stavanger accepted their arguments, ruling: to send the children to Norwegian foster families until they come of age. Parents were allowed to visit them three times a year, while the court allowed no more than one hour for each visit. More children were separated from each other. Apparently, so that the native language does not remind of an unhappy Indian childhood.

Despite the confidentiality, the press still got hold of the guardianship argument presented to the court. It turned out that the list of unacceptable mistakes of a young family was very extensive. The eldest child not only did not have his own crib, but the clothes on him were not exactly his size, and he played with toys that were not for his age. However, his parents also gave him little space for games.

Little Aishwarya was also in danger: her mother, holding her in her arms, made "sudden movements." Although some of the irresponsible couple's crimes - like changing diapers on the bed rather than on a special table - were not considered significant by the trial court, the children's advocates did not dwell on individual episodes. In their opinion, the whole situation was indicative of "serious doubts" about the ability of parents to take care of children.

In particular, social workers were concerned about the "inability of the mother to meet the emotional needs of the child." After all, when she was breastfeeding her daughter, she did not press her to her arms, as European women usually do, but held her on her knees. In general, Sagarika seemed to the staff of the guardianship to be somehow alarmed and tired - clearly prone to depression. After all, otherwise why would she worry, being in the center of the caring attention of the social service?

Thus, the court was absolutely right in deciding to permanently select Abighyan and Aishwarya. The court acted in full compliance with the Norwegian Children's Welfare Act, the court acted and was guided solely by the interests of little Indians. In the foster family, Abigyan was guaranteed a separate bed, without any suspicious fathers at his side, as well as a high chair and cutlery, which his parents had deprived him of. And Aishwarya - a bottle of milk and a changing table.

The behavior of the Norwegian social workers seems insane, but in fact they acted in full compliance with the aforementioned law. Article 3-1, concerning child welfare, clearly states: “Child Protective Services is responsible for identifying, at a sufficiently early stage, neglect and behavioral, social and emotional problems in order to eliminate these problems and take measures to resolve them. ". And Article 4-2 lists as the primary reason for removing a child from a family “serious omissions in the day-to-day care received by the child, or serious omissions in terms of personal contact and security at a level that the child needs in accordance with his age and development.” So, according to the law, they did everything right.

A SOCIALIST VIEW ON THE SAVAGES Much to the bewilderment of the Norwegian authorities, this story was of great interest in India. After all, we are talking about the forced detention for assimilation in Norway of two Indian citizens. Anurup Bhattacharya was not a guest worker or an illegal immigrant in Norway who yearned for Scandinavian well-being, but a highly qualified specialist, invited since 2007 to work under a contract with an international oil corporation. An Indian couple has been considering Norway as a temporary residence and their visas are expiring in March 2012.

In addition, literally all the details of this case offended the Indians. First, it was a shock to them to learn that, from the point of view of the Norwegian courts, the entire Indian nation without exception is unworthy of raising their children. The Indian opposition recalled in the debate that even the god Ganesha slept in the arms of his mother when his enemies deprived him of his human head (after which he had to gain an elephant). Secondly, the Indian embassy, which began to officially inquire about the fate of the Bhattacharya children in early December, was first politely sent away by a petty trustee manager who did not see a direct connection between Indian underage citizens and diplomats of this country.

Only Indian Foreign Minister SM Krishna and Indian President Pratibha Pratil proved to be worthy interlocutors for the Norwegian children's social service in the dispute that arose. Now the service has gone down the drain. In accordance with the agreement signed between the two countries, the social workers agreed to extradite the children to India to their uncle.

However, guardianship continues to torment unfortunate parents and the Indian public, delaying the transfer of children and forcing the uncle to attend courses on proper infant care.

However, Indian officials found something to answer. Coincidentally, in the midst of the scandal, the continued operation of the Norwegian telecommunications company Telenor in India was called into question. On February 2, the Supreme Court of India, recalling a four-year-old corruption scandal, revoked 122 licenses from her. But the mobile communications market in India is the second largest in the world, and Telenor invested $1.24 billion just when entering it. However, the Indian Foreign Ministry managed to hook the Norwegians alive even before Telenor had problems.

The Indians used a terrible weapon - they accused the Norwegian social workers of intolerance. This forced the head of the service, Gunnar Thoresen, to break his proud silence in January and write a press release stating that cultural differences had absolutely nothing to do with this story, and the law does not allow to admit what was the matter.

This is not the first time that Norwegian officials have been accused of intolerance towards other cultures and even racism. Back in 2006, African Press International warned that the Norwegian guardianship authorities were deliberately breaking up the families of African immigrants. But it's one thing - when unknown journalists write something in Africa. And it's quite another thing when headlines from the series "It's getting dangerous to work in Norway" appear in English-language media around the world. After such PR, Norwegians may not be afraid that foreign migrants with MBA degrees will take away their jobs. Only those migrants who do not read newspapers in principle will continue to arrive in the country - because they do not know how.

Elena Benshin has been living in Norway for many years. She spoke about how families live in this country, what are the traditions of raising children in the northern kingdom.

childbirth

In Norway, the natural approach is universally preached: it is believed that pregnancy is not a disease, but the natural state of a woman. At the same time, the support of the father throughout all nine months is considered necessary: couples go to the doctor together, and the husband is almost always present at childbirth. In some ways, this is a modern trend, because Norway has long been a rather poor fishing country. In simple families, a man was more often at sea than at home. Therefore, the woman coped with household duties, with pregnancy, with children herself.

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There are no taboos regarding the age at which a child can be shown. Relatives, friends, colleagues come to see the newborn almost immediately. In the same way, it is not customary to hide a pregnancy. The fact that an addition is expected in the family becomes known to everyone around the twelfth week. Contrary to tradition in Russia, in Norway you can give gifts in advance. Therefore, the dowry for the child is collected little by little, starting from the first weeks of pregnancy. At the same time, relatives and friends are usually very actively involved in this wonderful process, so by the time the child is born, enough things are being collected.

In the hospital, the medical staff usually congratulates the parents in a downright romantic setting. They bring candles and put the Norwegian flag on the table.

The traditions of family education in Norway depend on the region and the environment in which the family lives. In each region of this actually small country, people speak their own dialect, which is often not understood by those who come from another area. What can we say about traditions, even if the language differs so much. Fishermen, farmers and white-collar workers, of course, raise their children in different ways.

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And yet there are moments that can be called common. Modern Norwegian parents rarely keep their children strict. Few of the mothers and fathers will scold children, forbid or call for order. Rather, on the contrary. It comes to the fact that educators in kindergartens and teachers in schools are asked to be stricter with children.

One of the main values is family mutual assistance. Family is a common thing. So everyone has to contribute something to it. Parents take care of children, but children are also actively involved in many issues. For example, it is customary for elders to take care of younger brothers and sisters. And this is not just for girls. The brothers also take care of the younger ones, walk, look after. This is not considered shameful. Parents communicate with children on an equal footing. Adults can talk on various topics, including sensitive issues. It’s easier to explain once than to avoid answering for years. At the same time, there are traditional conversations about choosing a future life partner. Parents are unlikely to openly impose their will, but they will express their opinion.

Emancipation and the struggle for equal rights left their mark on the upbringing of Norwegian boys and girls. Here they try to avoid any gender division in regard to children. In fact, there are no toys for boys and girls or male and female sports. Do what you want and play what you want if you like it. The same goes for choosing a profession. There is no male or female work. Can you do it? Work.

In Norway, it is impossible to hear phrases like: "Be a man!", "You're a girl, girls don't do that" or "This is not a job for girls", as well as "Men don't cry".

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This equality responds differently in adulthood. On the one hand, it gives freedom. On the other hand, often from childhood, independent and emancipated Norwegian women take on all possible tasks and carry them out with heroic tenacity, without accepting anyone's help. Not every Norwegian woman will allow a man to open a door or carry a heavy bag. At the same time, there is no logical answer to the question, why not actually agree to help. Because in the minds of most girls since childhood there is simply no such category as male help. Everything is common, everything is the same. Sometimes it comes to situations on the verge of absurdity. Let me tell you about a situation in my life. New desktops come to the firm and instead of asking for help from men, who are in abundance in the office, women begin to carry the furniture themselves. They tear their backs and do not even think about the fact that men would do it faster, not to mention the fact that it is easier and better. When one of our compatriots decided, just for the sake of experiment, to ask for help, the Norwegian men let out a sigh of relief. They helped with great pleasure and continue to help. Although they often simply do not dare to offer help to their ladies.

However, this is only one side of the coin. It is sometimes said that Norway is a paradise for women. And this is also true. The fact is that there are fewer women than men. Therefore, almost any woman can find a companion if she wishes. What can not be said about men. This is especially true in rural areas. In a situation where there are 27 boys and 9 girls in a class of 36 children in a village school, it is not easy to find a girlfriend. Perspicacious parents conduct explanatory work with their sons from childhood. Set them up for tough competition. Some heartbreakers are such that the fight for them begins as early as kindergarten. Here is one of the real stories. The children were friends in kindergarten, then the "groom's" family moved, and he moved to another kindergarten. Despite this, his parents regularly brought him to visit his "beloved". And they were then three years old ... In some ways it's funny, but it clearly shows how seriously parents can take this issue. And although it is unlikely that it will be possible to “stake out” a girl in kindergarten, it is quite possible to instill perseverance in a boy.

The role of parents has changed a lot. There is no longer an idea that chopping wood and pounding on the table is the role of a father, and cooking and pitying is the role of a mother. The father is so directly involved in pregnancy, childbirth, maternity leave (which is given to fathers along with mothers) that often there is no difference between parents in terms of raising or caring for children.

Most Norwegian grandparents work until the age of 67. Therefore, they do not have many opportunities to take care of their grandchildren. The main policy of parents after the children have created their own family is not to interfere. Much of this applies to the upbringing of children. Newly minted parents should rely primarily on themselves. Of course, situations in life are different. If you need help, grandparents will help. But without a request, you should not expect that one of the older relatives will take the initiative himself.

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Participation in the life of grandchildren mainly comes down to gifts, usually expensive, and family holidays. This does not mean that a child cannot just come to visit his grandparents. It's just that no one cultivates it as a system of constant babysitting. But in the grandmother's house, children are usually allowed everything. If you want - run, if you want - play, if you want to climb into your grandmother's chest of drawers or into the chicken coop, you are welcome both there and there.

Families are smaller now. But the generation of those who are now over 60, as a rule, has a large family. Grandmothers can have five, or six, or more brothers and sisters. As a rule, everyone maintains relationships and there is a tradition of holding family conventions. Sometimes they even have to rent gyms in schools. Because relatives from all sides are recruited by 200 or more people. The event is very interesting. For the young, it is an opportunity to learn more about their family and roots; for the older ones, it is a chance to meet relatives who sometimes have not been seen for years.

It is very difficult for Norwegians to explain why they need to knock on wood, spit over their left shoulder, sit on the road or look in the mirror if they came back for something. For the most part, they do not attach importance to superstition. This also applies to gifts. Watches, knives and other "forbidden items" in Norway are given quite calmly. An even number of flowers in a bouquet also does not cause unpleasant associations for anyone. Here, in principle, no one will count the flowers in a vase or bouquet.

Most family traditions today are associated with holidays. And in many ways they do not coincide with what we are used to. The New Year, for example, is not particularly celebrated. It is rather an occasion to meet friends, go to a party, rather than a family celebration.

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But Christmas is a real main family holiday. Preparation for it begins four weeks in advance, from the first Sunday of Advent (Christmas Lent). The tradition of observing fasts is long gone, but Advent has remained. During this period, everything is decorated in lilac-violet tones. Children receive Christmas calendars. Four candles are placed in special beautiful wreaths according to the number of Sundays left until Christmas.

This is the holiday time. A new candle is lit every week. At this time, children prepare Christmas gifts, not only at home, but also in schools and kindergartens. Christmas is preceded by a very beautiful feast of Saint Lucy. It is celebrated not only in Norway, but throughout Scandinavia. Protestants do not venerate saints. Saint Lucia's Day entered Sweden in a roundabout way and then spread to neighboring countries. Few people think about the meaning of the holiday itself. Saint Lucia was a Sicilian martyr who was blinded and killed for her faith in Christ. But there is also a legend that Lucia was the wife of a fisherman in Sweden. One night, when the husband was at sea, a storm broke out. The roaming evil spirits extinguished the lighthouse. Then Lucia went out to the rock with a lantern and showed the fishermen the way to the shore. With this, she angered the evil spirit. The devils attacked the girl and cut off her head. But even after that, the ghost of Lucia stood on a rock with a burning lamp, continuing to show the way to the house wandering in the sea. On St. Lucia's Day, girls dress in white, sing songs about Lucia, and treat everyone to saffron buns.

A couple of days before Christmas, decorations in houses change to red. Children attend churches, put together with teachers sketches about the birth of Christ. December 24 is a working day, but it ends early. By 12 noon everyone is already free and hurrying home. Gifts are laid out under the tree. The culmination of the holiday is a family dinner. Each region has its own menu for the holiday. The main dish can be smoked and then boiled lamb head, lamb ribs, steamed, pork ribs, fish. After dinner for children comes one of the happiest moments of the year. Gifts open! This solemn event is followed by the serving of dessert and long conversations in the family circle. During the Christmas holidays, relatives often meet for dinner or lunch.

In February, Mother's Day is traditionally celebrated, which usually falls on the second Sunday of the month. In a sense, this is an analogue of March 8, with the difference that children give gifts to mothers, and not husbands to wives. However, the father is usually involved in the selection of the gift and can sponsor it. On this day, the younger ones visit the older ones. Usually families gather at the grandparents' house for a family dinner. There is also a traditional Father's Day.

Perhaps the most important day for Norway is May 17, Constitution Day. For all its statehood, it has become quite popular and family. It was on May 17 that Norway ceased to be part of the Swedish-Norwegian union and became an independent state. On this day, it is customary to wear national costumes - bunads, which, by the way, cost (on average!) About 5 thousand dollars. However, most families have such costumes. The first bunad is usually put on for confirmation. This is another family tradition. Initially, confirmation (chrismation) is the confirmation of the choice of Christianity and the acceptance of the gifts of the Holy Spirit. Now this is a dedication to adulthood. It usually goes away by the age of 15. Be sure to gather all the relatives. A holiday is being arranged. The main gift for confirmation is money. So the youth begins to collect their first independent capital. So, the national costume purchased for confirmation is then put on for the holiday on May 17 without fail.

In Viking times, all the main responsibilities for housekeeping lay entirely on the shoulders of a woman. Of course, this primarily depended on how wealthy the family was, what class it belonged to, but in general, the woman was the "keeper of the hearth" in the full sense of the expression. She had to make sure that the family always had enough food on the long dark winter days, she was engaged in cooking butter, cheese, drying fish, meat, making stocks of smoked meats. Along the way, healers also had duties on her: if someone in the family fell ill or was injured, it was the woman who had to treat and nurse the patient. In addition, a woman had to thoroughly know all religious and other traditional rites.

In the absence of men, the typically masculine household duties also fell on women. Of course, if a family was wealthy enough to have servants or slaves, life would be much easier for them. And as a sign that she was the mistress of the house, the woman was given the keys to the storerooms. Keys were usually worn on a belt around the waist.

Distribution of duties in those days it also had the so-called. territorial expression, namely, the threshold of the house, a kind of "watershed": what was outside the threshold of the house was in the hands of men, and everything that was inside the house was in the hands of women. However, some women, especially physically strong and hardy, could also take part in the battles, they were called "skjoldmo", in other words, warriors. Perhaps this is the origin of emancipation?

In poor families, the line between men's and women's responsibilities was often blurred, as all family members had to participate equally in housekeeping, which was vital to survival.

Nowadays...

How are things in our time? Is it a man's job to wash the dishes? Who should cook, husband or wife? Who is engaged in bringing the house into a divine form? Who finally goes shopping and taking out the trash? Has anything changed in the distribution of household chores in the Norwegian family?

Of course, yes, although not so drastically. Now you rarely hear that washing dishes or washing floors is not a man's job, on the contrary, in Norwegian families there is an increasing tendency for the husband to cook and make the house look divine. At the same time, the Norwegian man still has the responsibility of repairing the house/garage/car, i.e. sawing - nailing - repairing is still a typical "man's business". Outbuildings are usually also under his jurisdiction. However, almost exactly like men, many Norwegian women are able to independently assemble furniture, hammer a nail into a wall or, for example, carefully mow a grassy lawn. All these are persistent trends of our time.

What causes this:

technical progress in the service of women's duties in a Norwegian family.

The boundary between the Masculine and the Feminine began to be completely blurred in Norwegian families with the advent of prosperity and the development of technological progress. Indeed, is it really that difficult to wash the dishes, that is, put dirty dishes in the dishwasher? And washing, which used to be a typically feminine and very boring task, has turned into a simple unloading and loading of sorted dirty laundry. Agree, if cleaning, washing, ironing is not a burden, it does not matter who will do it: you or your husband. We, who are not very accustomed to the fact that household chores can be so - quite easy - at first touched by the fact that the Norwegians do not disdain to clean up the dishes, put dirty linen in the washing machine, but then we just get used to it. Because this is probably how it should be: domestic work in Norway is usually not a burden to anyone.

Norwegian deserves a special mention. the tradition of cooking dinners and the widespread use of semi-finished products. I remember how shocked I was when my husband refused to buy a lunch thermos, in which I intended to roll the first-second-salad. He motivated this by the fact that "they never eat hot lunch in Norway." This, they say, is not Russia or Sweden for you. For lunch, it is customary to bring sandwiches carefully arranged with special pieces of paper from home.

Matpakki. Well, I mastered the simple science of making matpakk in a minute: three slices of bread and butter, a little pate, a little salami, cucumbers, tomatoes, lettuce. It sounds dreary, ascetic and not very appetizing, but how easy it is for those who do not like to spend time cooking! The use of semi-finished products is also amazing at first. My husband, I remember, was surprised for a long time that I had the patience to cook real meat broth for hours, instead of just gurgling a few cubes of instant convenience food into the pan. But the ready-made pancake mixture or some kind of mixture for baking puff pastry really saves a lot of time and effort. Gradually you get used to the fact that matpakki are wrapped for school for a child and for work for a husband, that making buns with raisins along with the baking process takes only half an hour, and in general, in Norway there is no cult of fatty and complexly cooked food, and Norwegian husbands are very unpretentious people, with rare exceptions. And this unpretentiousness, in turn, is a consequence of the early independence of the Norwegians.

So, early independence of Norwegian men.

In Norway, you will not surprise anyone when an 18-year-old "boy" (in our terms) leaves his father's house and begins to live on his own. Studying, housekeeping, the first big purchases, even if sometimes unjustified or frankly stupid - everything is done by him, with his own earned (borrowed) funds, parents only worry and slightly direct the process of growing up. Thus, by the age of 25, a Norwegian man: has his own house and car, knows how to cook (whether he has mastered the full heights of the culinary arts or still eats warm pizza), cleans himself, irons his shirts, sews on torn buttons, cleans, washes floors, etc. In a word, he lives with his own mind and on his own money, performing all "typically female duties." The parental house with pies and an iron is far away, you have to do everything yourself. And if you get married, do not expect that all household chores can be pushed onto your wife, because "equality" in Norway is not an empty word, there is a whole state policy behind it.

Norwegian public policy in the service of gender equality.

Equality, equality and once again equality. Particular attention is paid to changing the role of men in the family, since in Norway, even at the state level, there is an opinion that both men and women should have absolutely equal rights not only in elections or employment, but also in family life, especially since that in Norwegian families both husband and wife usually work

How does the state try to ensure equal opportunities for childcare, distribution of household chores, etc.?

One of the main problems in Norwegian families with a small child is known to be chronic lack of time. A woman, if a man does not help her, is in a constant state of stress. You will say that our mothers went through the same thing and survived, and you will be right. But at what cost? At the cost of health, nerves? The Norwegian state is well aware that the catastrophic lack of time can be solved not only by turning a working woman into a housewife, but also by redistributing responsibilities. That is why men were also given the right to paid parental leave.

In addition, since February 1, 1995, either parent has been entitled to unpaid parental leave, in addition to paid leave.

Norway currently has one of the highest birth rates in Europe - 1.9. According to this indicator, Norway is ahead of such countries as Italy and Spain, and all this is largely due to a balanced state policy.

Emancipation

But what about making money and raising children, you ask? Here, however strange it may seem to us, brought up in the old traditions of house building, the same general European trends are observed: more and more often women are equal or even the main earners of money, since the rights to education and work are the same, and more and more often it is women who lead household budget, more and more men are taking parental leave... Everything is turning upside down? No, of course it's not. Or rather, not quite so. And to be more precise, everything changes with the birth of a child. If before the birth of the first child, a young Norwegian family calmly and evenly distributes household chores approximately equally between the spouses, with the birth of a child, the situation changes in the direction of a greater workload for the young mother.

What is more important: family or career?

Oddly enough, this question is now more often faced by Norwegian women than men. Many men in Norway, in principle, do not consider it shameful to take the same parental leave in their company, that is, family matters are a priority for them, and they do not consider them as "sitting with a child is a typical female occupation." In addition, in Norway, it is not uncommon for a young single dad, having won the child from his ex-wife, to radically change his career. More precisely, he changes his job, looks for additional ways to earn money or a more convenient work schedule, and some dads sometimes even ... turn into Dagpapa - the Norwegian Mustachioed Nanny! Child, family - more expensive. Dagpapa does the same thing as dagmama (nanny) - that is, she changes diapers for her and "coming" children, walks, plays, in general, she is not inferior to dagmama at all.

Conclusion:

I cannot say that the distribution of household responsibilities in a Norwegian family is always ideal, and in all families things are exactly as described in this article, but still, the realization that behind the broad, caring and reliable back of a Norwegian husband who he can cook dinner, and wash the laundry, and wash the floor, and go to the hospital with the child, the family will not be lost, no matter what happens to the mother - it’s worth a lot.