Often we think that dependence on alcohol is the problem of the alcoholic itself. However, if someone from family members use alcohol, it affects all who live with it under one roof. What are dangerous changes occurring with close patients with alcoholic dependence? We will talk about this with a narcologist Lyudmila Dyachkova.

Alcoholism is not just a problem of weak will, it is a serious illness. Many know this, but few people know that as a result of the alcoholism of a close man and all his closest environment: Mother, children, spouse (also happening in cases where his wife gets ill, but it happens less often, so we will talk about drinking in Male kind). Often, the relatives of an alcoholic just can change their behavior as their dependent close. Such a problem of scientists call the term "copending".

Capacity is manifested in four spheres. First, health is destroyed. It is impossible not to hurt a person who is in constant stress: it causes headache, diseases of the gastrointestinal tract, heart problems, with female genital sphere.

Secondly, in the psychological sphere, after six months, the violations begin to manifest themselves and consolidate. In co-dependent families, in order to somehow save peace and tranquility, there is a checked rule - nothing to talk about the problem of alcoholism, because it displays the most dependent person. Especially this problem is hidden from outsiders, it is not endured outside the family. Therefore, it is not customary to talk about your feelings at all.

Thirdly, as a result, the social sphere suffers. The family in which there is a dependent person lives closed, cooked in its own juice. No need to say, in what country conditions there is a family that hides in itself such a mystery. Children cannot invite to visit friends, because they are ashamed, it is not known that a drunken father can do with outsiders. The wife does not go with her husband to visit and is afraid of the holidays, because it is always waiting for the husband will lose control and get drunk. She begins to be afraid of superfluous questions, a permanent lies enters her life and the life of children. Trust connections are violated with relatives, especially with her husband's parents.

In co-dependent families, the states of the dependent person also occupy the central place. The wife of a patient with alcohol addiction is completely absorbed by the life of his fucker husband. She has no time to think even about raising children.

Fourth, in the family of the dependent gradually destroyed spirituality. In a treating person, this also applies to the children of an alcoholic, the need to manage their own and someone else's life arises, as this creates an illusion of security. There is a need to control everything and everything, in an important, and trifles, which leads to further collapse. Alcoholic children often cannot be built healthy families in the future because of this, as they are looking for problem partners, whose life they could "correct".

How to do a native person with alcohol addiction?

As a rule, all the actions of the wife are aimed at the husband threw a drink. This need leads to total control. The very first sign of television - when the wife is trying to take responsibility for the sobriety of her husband. This is expressed in many things: control of the amount of drunk, hiding bottles, pouring alcohol, intimidation, etc. But all this does not work. Believe me, many tried to do the same, it does not bring positive results. Even the opposite.

How does an alcoholic wife come correctly? First of all, give up the role of defender and rescuer. When the dependent can not go to work in the morning, do not cover it before the bosses at work. By doing this, the wife promotes the development of the disease.

What is dangerous copender?

Capacity does not give an alcoholic to see its problem. In a treating family, drinking is very simple and convenient to continue to use alcohol. Whatever enough, all the rules that exist in such a family are aimed at the fact that the disease continues.

There are cases when the dependent person passed the course of treatment and returns to the family, and his loved ones unconsciously push him into alcoholism again. A copended person lives with the expectation of the worst, he no longer believes in good. The spouse with horror is waiting for the day when her husband swallows again. These fears are noticeable, they are manifested in suspicion, distrust, reproaches, lies, control - all this pushes the spouse to accept alcohol, to the familiar way to get a way from unpleasant reality. It is necessary to change not only an alcoholic, but also the whole family.

Speaking about the danger of television, it is important to mention the fate of the children of alcoholics. Becoming adults, they do not know how to solve problems, they are irresponsible, do not know how to build relationships with the surrounding people. They are tormented by the insult, fear, shame, anger, anger. With these feelings it is impossible to live, often they are looking for themselves the opportunity to relieve stress in the same alcohol. Those of them, who made a tendency to super susso from the family, with a large share of the probability will create a family with a dependent person.

Where is the way out?

It is necessary to break the vicious circle of dependency, stop the conspiracy of silence. Learn to talk about your problem with people outside the family. You need to get knowledge about alcohol addiction.

It must be recognized that your close is painful with alcoholism. It is not human fault, but his trouble, and he needs specialized help. But the responsibility for recovery should belong to the person himself.

A copended person needs to take care of himself and about children. Admit to themselves: "I am also sick," and recognize as much as possible about this disease. The most complex and most important step is to recognize that I myself can not cope with compliance, you need help from outside. It is also important to remove the guilt for the drunkenness of the native person.

We must learn to respond for your own, and not for someone else's life. Work on yourself, develop, get rid of incorrect behavior, recover.

Where does a co-dependent person can get help?

In narcological centers there are support groups for relatives of alcoholics and drug addicts. These groups operate under the program "12 steps". I know many families who were able to recover on this program.

Tamed Natalia Kemmenov

The article is prepared by materialsvideo programs TRC "Three Angel"

Alcoholic in the family is always big problems that are often developing in drama and even tragedy. What if your loved one started drinking? Send to a doctor? And if it does not go, say that he has no problems with whom he could not cope with himself. In addition, a rare alcoholic considers himself to be sick. Do not lag and constantly push, "cut"? From this even more pulls to get drunk. Throw, for example, leaving? Some will work out, and some only angry.

Husband and wife

How do your wife behave in such situations, whose husbands drink, and husbands whose wives addicted to alcohol? It turns out, very different. This found out an employee of the National Institute for US alcoholism (NIAAA) Jacqueline Weisman, who summarized his observations in a fairly volumetric monograph "Alcohol Andwomen".

Generally, women Much earlier notice that their husbands began with alcohol. Moreover, the wives calculate their spouses on indirect signs - the disappearance at night, the participation of the "corporate standards" or other holidays and the feasts, to which his wife cease to take, rudeness in sex, outbreaks of unmotivated aggression and in many others, which are in a solid picture.

Men In this regard, behind. And so much that the problems are noticed when they are already quite full-scale. For example, the wife began to be regularly drunk and behave, gently say, inadequate. Or the farm and children came to complete launch. Men prefer not to give much importance, until not to notice it becomes impossible.

Wives As a rule, immediately rush to the struggle for her husband. Trying to act by logic, belief, tears, harsh, finally, threats - all the arsenal of funds who bestowed a woman nature.

Husband Prefer inaction, waiting that everything will be resolved. They are sure that it is useless to help his wife, to stop drunkenness can only she herself and only if this herself wants.

Wives Slightly by force leads to husbands to be treated, threatening with departure, divorce or even suicide.

Husband Do not insist on immediate full-fledged and high-quality spouses for different reasons - from fear of expenses to jealousy (for example, during treatment, a wife can meet with a man treated there, and then ...).

Wives Most often, they remain with a husband, an alcoholic until the end of treatment, really, go and start a separate independent life of the unit. Considerations are different - money, housing, sacrifice, and love with no accounts can not be discharged.

Husband Often, one or two stationary wife's treatment. As soon as after treatment, she again breaks down in a drink, men are mostly leaving.

Emergency drug dealers (withdrawal to the house) more often cause wives wives than husbands wives.

These are the most typical gender (sex) differences in the relationship to the alcoholic spouse. Of course, there are exceptions, but the general picture looks like this.

How to behave

Of course, list the characteristic features of the behavior of spouses are wonderful. And what is the correct behavior? After all, it is no secret that the strengths and weaknesses, their rational grains, are in feminine, and in the male position.

Let's try to give a kind of "manual" of an alcoholic in the family.

First of all, the alcoholic should see the consequences of his behavior. The family often tries to protect it from these consequences, which is one of the most common mistakes. Do not do this! Do not guide the order behind him, do not remove the traces of vomiting, let it do it yourself. Strictly follow the facts, do not turn the attempts to "remember yesterday" in the fun. Many alcoholics to horror are afraid of failures in memory and throw it precisely in fear before repetition of an attack of amnesia.

Do not buy drinking alcoholic, do not block before the bosses, if he / she strives work. By phone with my leadership, let him explain independently, in whatever condition he is not.

Do not play "control of alcohol". Hide bottles, pour their contents in the sink is useless. If the patient himself is not able to control himself, the spouse will not work sooner. The inventive alcoholic will still find a way to slip out due to control, and the unbeatful will get out and faster to aggression.

Emplements read also useless, they do not help. Although the idea of \u200b\u200bconfrontation in the treatment of alcoholism is gaining increasing popularity. Another thing is that weapons are a double-edged, use they need to be able to use. It is better if a specialist psychotherapist teach this. Otherwise, you can block such firewood ...

"Every unhappy family is incomprehensible in its own way," remember this phrase from Anna Karenina? With regard to an alcoholic in the family, she is more than ever by the way. Each case is unique, in each you need to understand and produce a certain line of behavior. Of course, you can do this by the method of trial and errors, but more reasonably trust a professional.

The editors thanks the specialists of the Alcomed Medical Center for help in the preparation of the material.

Instruction

Aware that your family has a problem if your spouse begins to depend on alcohol. The more often and the more he drinks, the more alcoholism is tightened. The behavior of such a man becomes another. Unreasonable aggression, tendency and indifference to important life aspects become its permanent satellites.

Understand that if your husband does not want to fight with its dependence, then your family life will become worse. Over time, your spouse will be completely impossible to rely on. If you have children, they will suffer from drinking father and they will suffer.

Talk to my husband, calm, but very serious. Only select the correct moment for the conversation. Conduct a conversation with a spouse, which is in a state of alcohol intoxication or suffers a hangover, non-constructive. Explain to your faithful that you can not see how he ruins his and your life, and offer your help in the fight against his drunkenness.

Support your husband if he agreed to treatment. If he cannot stop drinking independently, you will need help narcologist. There are many methods of treating alcoholism: with the use of drugs, hypnosis or psychological assistance.

Remember that if the use of alcohol turned out for your spouse dependent, it needs to stop drinking once and for all. No restrictions may be speech. Reducing the dose is not an output for. So the dependence will not disappear and after a while will take a new force.

Promoting a healthy lifestyle in your family. Find a hundred and one way to you with my husband to enjoy the evenings, weekends, holidays and holidays without alcohol. Let your husband understand that without alcohol he does not lose something, but on the contrary, opens the whole world.

Keep in mind that if your husband, like many alcoholics, is not aware of the existence of the problem and does not agree to treatment, the only way out for you to live a normal, full, happy life is divorce. No need to sacrifice yourself to someone who does not want to fight the disease. It will not lead anything good.

Know that supporting an alcoholic who is not going to change his life, you have a bear service. If you are divided with your husband, it can become such a shock for him, which will allow to reconsider their behavior and correct. Unfortunately, there are girls who do not understand this and continue to suffer, mistakenly consider themselves also involved in the fact that the spouse began to drink. No need to overestimate your influence on the choice of a free person.

Do not build yourself a heroine. It is possible that among the wives of alcoholics there are such parties that self-affirmation at the expense of their unbind spouses. After all, against the background of such a vice, their own shortcomings and weaknesses become completely invisible. And thanks to the daily feat, which makes a woman who lives with a drinking man, the other mistakes and misses are bothering.

Video on the topic

There are relations that are difficult to complete without a sharp rupture. Because any tightening leads to the fact that a person is no longer able to withstand the goods of these problems. As a result, he sinks himself in the bunch of partner's problems, and sometimes these problems lie in alcoholism.

Instruction

Alcoholics - skillful manipulators. They put on your pity, conscience. They know how to swear that tomorrow will begin a new life, so today it is necessary to make a commemoration of yourself. Tomorrow will come, and they will begin to argue that in the evening they will be in a decent form to meet a new day, and for this they need a little. A little drink. But tomorrow is exactly all - will be tuned. Familiar picture? How many times have you witnessed this skillful setting. And even took part in this farce, covering the table for "compensation". It seemed to you that this is a helpless person who will disappear without you. In general, well, who is not without sin. What is convenient such a position? You kind of in the eyes of the public is not, a sick person in a difficult situation. Yes, it is the patient. After all, doctors have long argued that alcoholism is a disease. But it gives the course of this hidden illness himself. Alcoholism is poorly treated. Because the depths of this disease in the psychological plane. There will be no result without the desire of the patient. And the patient's desire should be based on any serious reasons. While he knows that he will be accepted and so, he has no desire to change something in his life

Alcoholics can cause pity and sympathy. And it is in Russia that they know how this from others. In our mentality, the paradoxial interpretation of compassion is laid. We are sorry for the neighborhood and absolutely do not worry the suffering of children in oncological centers. And when you ask yourself a question, is it worthy of a healthy adult men of your pity, the answer will be unequivocal. Are you ready to endure a river, beatings, his constant unemployment and your savings on everything. And if you have children, whether they deserve to see every day such an unpleasant picture, like a drunk father. For what, you spend the years of your only life. No one is right to steal these priceless days on drunkenness.

Make the first step is always difficult. But in the situation of life with any changes will be for the best. Moreover, as practice shows when such people remain completely alone, without the support of loved ones and friends, they change. After all, it is no longer anyone else to pour your face-made problems (the reason why they drink). There are no viewers who will regret and throw. Only pulling out until the bottom, you can push off to start a new life.

Video on the topic

Tip 3: Life next to an alcoholic: how not to destroy yourself

Alcoholic necessarily can wander with a bottle of street.
In most cases, such a person has a house where he returns after work. But the trouble - he drinks every day more and more, and about loved ones even less.

Life with an alcoholic is simply unbearable. Unfortunately, a drinking person not only degrades himself, but also destroys the life of people close to him. The most correct and simple is not to live with an alcoholic. But, unfortunately, due to certain circumstances, women tolerate their babes with decades.

How is the destruction of ourselves

Taking the task - to help a close person to throw a drink, in no case should you forget about yourself. In order to live with an alcoholic, you must first have strong nerves. Constantly afraid of his disruptions and drunken trunks is extremely harmful.

It should be tried to protect yourself from communicating with a man at this time. Unfortunately, if the force to force an alcoholic to attend a narcologist's doctor or in secretly to add anti-alcohol drops to him, such actions will not give proper effect.

Like it is a paradoxically, a woman to the question "why she will not leave a drinking husband," often declares that he will disappear without her. How to explain the behavior of a woman?

She tends to exaggerate their significance in the life of another person. Such a mood makesone feel some superiority over her alcoholic husband. Thus, it implements their internal complexes. In other cases, the woman is gaining a victim and gets used to such a lifestyle.

In fact, the wife has long gave out a rut of a normal life. Its existence completely depends on the dose of a person close to it. This is a co-addiction.

Another side of the medal is a woman who lives with a drinking person, overestimates his efforts in an attempt to cure him. It is morally emptosed, exhausted, but not surrender. In many cases, the desperate wife imperceptibly starts drinking for himself. As the saying goes: Husband drinks - half of the hut is lit, and the wife drinks - the whole hollow in the fire.

Abstinence from alcohol - not the end of difficulties

So, after numerous alcoholic campaigns to the signs, lakes, narcologist doctors, psychotherapists in the life of people close to him the other phase comes. A woman and other family members are waiting for unpleasant changes associated with the emotional attitude of the "knitting" alcoholic.

First, the man will accompany the irritable mood. Secondly, he just will not know how to realize himself at home and in social life. And in such a situation, his wife, who decided to go to the end in the fight against drunkenness, should be in short patience.

After all, she will have to help his spouse to recover as a husband, father for his children and an employee at work. By the way, during this period a man is not insured against a breakdown again to start drinking alcohol.

Can a woman in such a situation not destroy their lives? There are few personalities who will always be on guard, constantly monitor the husband-alcoholic, to be with it nanny.

A woman should think if it does not have a bear service? After all, a drinking husband, confident that the spouse will endure him in any, risks until the end of his life remain dependent on alcohol.

We always need to remember - we have one life. What can the children see, living with a person who does not imagine the day without drinking a stack of vodka? What kind of return receives a woman who endure drunk antics of his man? And what awaits her next?

Of course, there are different situations in which a person really throws to drink, in front of loved ones and changes its life with a radically. But it happens not as often as I would like.

Unfortunately, to live next to an alcoholic and not destroy yourself - the task is not from the lungs. The most important thing is whether the person is worth it for which all this is done?

If a woman makes a lot of effort to return a man to a normal life, but there is no effect, the best thing is to part with him. By the way, for some alcoholics, ultimately, it becomes a good stimulus to throw drinking.

Articles and video

What to do if in the family alcoholic?

The problem of alcoholism in the family is currently quite sharp. It is the drunkenness of one of the spouses is one of the main causes of divorces. It is important to understand that alcohol addiction is, above all, a severe disease, to cope with which alone can literally units. Most patients require not only professional medical care, but also the participation of relatives and loved ones.

The drinker may pose a threat to others, because in the twisted state he is very vaguely realizes what makes, and often exhibits aggression. Communicate with alcoholics at least unpleasant. They tend to complain about their hard life even to unfamiliar people and persistently require attention and sympathy. If at first, such people cause pity, then after a few minutes of the conversation, as a rule, only disgust remains.

A universal answer to the question "how to behave with an alcoholic", perhaps, does not exist. Much depends on the degree of intoxication, the stage of illness and individual mental features. The best thing you can do to avoid possible problems is to avoid communicating with a person in strong sign up. Quarrels and fights whose instigators are alcoholics, unfortunately, very frequent phenomenon. Not stopped in the embryo conflicts can be sad for any of the parties. However, not all people have the opportunity to stay away from the drinker. Mothers, wives and children sometimes have nowhere to go, and they have to independently decide how to act in a particular situation.

Why become alcoholics?

The most common reasons for alcoholism include:

• attempt to care from reality;
• protest;
• larkractiveness.

Many begin to drink because of pity for themselves when reality for one or another reasons does not coincide with its expectations. Others abuse with alcoholic beverages called the spouse if conflict situations often develop in the family. Often, dependence develops unnoticed; At first, a person simply supports the company, drinking, in his opinion "like everyone else", but gradually draws away, and begins to look for the reasons once again to make a bottle.

The surrounding need to determine their behavior depending on the cause of the drunkenness of the relative. If alcoholism is a form of protest, then scandaling and teach absolutely useless. Against the background of the conflict, the situation will only be exacerbated. When the main factor becomes pity for himself, it is dangerous to show sympathy. Feeling support and pity, such an alcoholic will drink more and more.

If regular abuse of alcoholic beverages gradually became for an individual of the norm of life, but it is not ready to recognize the problem, then the persuasion will not lead to a change in the situation for the better. It is hardly the only solution to solve the problem of alcoholism in the family in this case can be only serious threats and professional assistance of a narcologist.

Wives of men abusing strong drinks, often lose themselves in the literal sense of the word; They appear so far. "CONFERENCE". They seem to dissolve in the problems of the spouse, which becomes the cause of mental disorders and psychosomatic pathologies. Some women even start drinking the company with her husband, and this is perhaps the most adverse event of events.

Women who do not know how to behave with an alcoholic husband, it is recommended to remember a number of simple rules:

• do not provoke a conflict;
• do not lead educational conversations while the spouse is in a state of intoxication;
• do not try to apply physical strength;
• do not create opportunities to continue the binge;
• do not threaten if you do not threaten it unreal;
• do not drink with my husband.

Important: If a man is aggressive and presents an obvious danger to his wife, children and other others, no need to tolerate violence, and wait when he calms down. In such cases, immediately call the police. Otherwise, the consequences can be very sad.

To arrange a scandal when the husband is very drunk or worse - in deep-frustrated, very dangerous. Drunky man and so do not need special reasons for a quarrel.

It is advisable to carry out educational conversations only on a sober head, and when the alcoholic takes place a hangover (with abstinence, some alcoholics are less damaged and more dangerous than after a solid "dose").

Do not attempt to show pity and sympathy, since this may be regarded by an alcoholic as weakness and the adoption of its "rules". To drink in such a situation he will definitely not quit.

It is extremely dangerous to exercise violence towards a drunk man - he is not able to control himself, and in infamousity is able to cause severe injuries around.

Important: Most of the household murders are committed precisely in a state of alcohol intoxication.

In no case should not make her husband a company; He will take a bad example as a guide to action.

One of the possible ways to combat drunkenness of a relative is publicity. If you inform about his unworthy behavior to work and friends, then after the filing, the alcoholic will be ashamed to look into their eyes. The condemnation of others can become an incentive to change its lifestyle.

It is advisable to demonstrate his acquaintances to her disapproval by the behavior of a drinking husband; For some men, contempt for their weakness is of great importance. You can put as an example of the spouse of nonbeid men who have achieved success in life, and even admire them. The pride is a weak point of most men, unless of course we are talking about finally degraded individuals.

If there were changes to the better, i.e., drunks stopped, it is important not to intercept the alcoholic, "taking the mind." Sobility should not be perceived as a feat. Remember that the abandoning from an alcohol man is dangerous to remind of its past "exploits" and show suspicion (for example, to check for the presence of a characteristic odor). Such an attitude can easily lead to a new breakdown.

If the husband or son decided to start life, as they say, "from a clean sheet", past pregressions need to forgive him, and never return to this painful topic. Only a competent approach to the current situation will help solve the problem of alcoholism in the family.

Alcoholism is an actual problem in our time. "Drunk father - Mountain in the family" - says a popular poster of Soviet times. Many probably do not know what life is with a person having an alcohol dependence. What if your close man is sick? How to protect yourself, and is it possible to save it?

Disease or not

There is no face that shared a healthy person and a dependent - alcoholic can also be considered the one who drinks every day on a glass and driving once a year before "piglery squeal". The key point is whether a person can stop and abandon alcohol in any situation.

Many say: "I can stop when I want," but this does not happen for two reasons: either not strong enough, or can not. In any case, it is impossible to ignore the effect of alcohol on the personality of a person.

First, the intellectual decline of the personality occurs. There are many cases when musicians, writers and even candidates of sciences became just anyone due to their destructive addictions. The loss of intelligence occurs due to oxygen deficiency, which adversely affects the nervous system as a whole.

The second irreversible consequence is the disappearance of empathy and irony. An experiment was published in Alcoholism: Clinical & Experimental Research magazine, during which it turned out - alcoholics do not understand humor and irony. In addition, it is difficult for them to understand the emotional attitude of the interlocutor.

No less sad that misinterdiction comes to the life of alcoholics. Droves are considered disadvantageous people, because alcohol gradually mastering their will, and any initiative to them alien.

Alas, with regular abuse of alcohol, the loss of moral principles occurs. Alcoholic is absolutely not interested in drawing feelings and desires.

Attention! During alcohol intoxication, a person does not control himself and, given the atrophing of moral principles, such people are better to avoid.

In the end, it arises the impossibility of overcoming life difficulties, apathy and despair - there is no resources and forces in an alcoholic to cope with them.

How to behave

A joint life with a person with alcoholism, often becomes hell. That's what you need to do so that your coexistence becomes most comfortable:

1. Speak. But only with sober. Talk about your feelings, how much you are worried about him. If a person loves you, he will hear, and together you will come up with what to do next.
2. Realize the problem. If you will "knock your head in the sand", then the problem is not going anywhere, but only aggravate.
3. Do not lead to provocations. When a man is drunk, the flashes of anger can occur suddenly. It is important to navigate and not respond to the provocation of the conflict.
4. To avoid conflict, talking calm and even tone, do not start sharp topics. In no case do not criticize the drunken - it does not make sense, but it can provoke aggressive behavior and lead to terrible consequences.
5. Find a lesson. Many believe that people are starting from boredom or deep experiences. If a person has a case to which he will completely give himself, then the time to drink will not remain.

Children

The parent-alcoholic may be dangerous not only physically, but also psychologically. The most important thing is not to join a drunk parent in deep contact - I don't talk about anything, not to ask, etc. But it is impossible to ignore it - when the alcoholic came home, children need politely to say hello to him, and go to a safe place - to Neighbor or grandmother.

Spouses

An alcoholic wife accommodates all of everyone - after all, it is she usually tolerates scandals, threats and a hangover in the morning. It is important for her to comply with the rule: love, but not to the detriment of yourself. Usually, it is his wife running in the morning in a pharmacy and cares about the sick husband, so he says to him: "I love you all, and you will not disappear with me," which creates the conditions for drunkenness.

Therefore, take care of the husband, if it fell ill with the flu, and if drunk - let him solve his problems itself. Equally important for the spouse of an alcoholic to have an intense - the deal with which you will forget about the problems in the family that will bring you peace of mind. It would be wonderful to protect the spouse from drinking companions - often their absence speeds up recovery.

Not only husbands may abuse alcohol. It is believed to cure feminine alcoholism much more difficult than male. If your favorite woman (mother, sister, wife) has encountered a problem with alcohol dependence - do not despair! The presence of a strong male shoulder near will significantly increase its chances of recovery.

It is known that women are much emotionally, they are harder to experience problems - so it is important for them to speak and hear the words of support. Do not disappear from the problems of your beloved - listen to it carefully, hug and think together what to do. Perhaps the woman is because it drinks that her problems are not interested in anyone.

The next reason for drinking can be a banal absence of your attention. The girl was so desperate to attract him that he went to extreme measures. Take a trip with her, invite a romantic dinner, give flowers - and she will understand what you need.

Frank letter readers! Pulled out a family from the pit! I was on the verge. My husband began to drink almost immediately after our wedding. First, on a little bit, to look into the bar after work, go to the garage with a neighbor. I came to my senses when he began to return heavily daily, Rubbed, drank salary. It really became terrible when the first time pushed. Me, then daughter. The next morning apologized. And so in a circle: lack of money, debts, swearing, tears and ... beatings. And in the mornings, apologies. If we were not tried, even coded. I'm not talking about conspiracies (we have a grandmother, who seemed to have pulled out everyone, just not my husband). After coding, he did not drink half a year, everything seemed to be better, began to live as a normal family. And on some day - again, stayed at work (as he said) and dragged him in the evening in the eyebrows. I still remember your tears that evening. I realized that there were no hopes. And somewhere in two or two and a half months I came across the Internet on alkotoxic. At that time I had already completely lowered my hands, my daughter went away from us at all, began to live at the girlfriend. I read about the drug, reviews and description. And, especially without hoping, I bought it - there is nothing to lose at all. And what do you think? !! She began to add drops to her husband in the morning in tea, he did not notice. Three days later came home. Sober!!! A week later, it was better to look better, well-being improved. Well, here I admitted to him that I applied the drops. On the sober head responded adequately. As a result, I dug the course of alkotoxic, and for half a year to alcohol, neither, at work, raised, returned home daughter. I'm afraid to smooth, but I became new! I mentally thank you every night that day when I learned about this miracle tool! I recommend to everyone! Save family and even life! Read about the means of alcoholism.

Sometimes alcoholism arises against the background of stress, deep intratinarity problems or fears, conflicts, etc. In order for the woman to share with you, make it so that she can trust you - talk to the souls, tell us about your feelings and open your heart.

When you realize that it is worried about the spouse, you can schedule an action plan - to visit a psychologist, help your beloved to cope with problems, take part of family worries for yourself. The next step is usually visited by doctors - drug therapy + psychotherapy will be most effective. And you will see that you can overcome alcoholism.

Parents

If you are the parents of an alcoholic, and live with him, it is also important not to contact with drunk. Parents have a soul for the fate of the child, but it is important to understand that he is already an adult, and give him the opportunity to dispose of his life. It is important to support the child in his fight against the disease and love it.

Typical errors

Wanting to save a loved one, many commit serious mistakes. What should I do if you notice a member of a family of alcohol addiction?

The first error is total control. Imagine the image of the "Wife of Alkash" is a powerful woman who is trying to keep her husband in his hunters. But most often it is impossible, because each person strives to be free and independently finish his fate. Therefore, it is important to understand that excessive control will not allow you to save your husband from alcoholism - rather, on the contrary, in order to avoid control, it will drink even diligent.

The opinion is equally common that we are able to save your beloved from alcoholism. But is it true? Many psychologists argue that, no matter how paradoxically, the desire to save anyone is selfish.

Important! Save a person from illness can doctors, but not relatives. What then can you help? Support. If a person really wants recovery, then he needs your warm words, presence, help. Support it, and he will know that not one.

Security

Family dependent team members often experience terrible things. They cannot feel in comfort and security in their own home, because constantly in fear and tension. How to protect yourself if there is an alcoholic in your house:

Realize the problem. Only when you realize what you want to get rid of alcohol, you can do something. Find the reason for your alcohol thrust. Remember why you started drinking: stress, boredom, conflict, etc. As soon as I reveal the reason, you can overcome and consequence - alcoholism.

Contact your loved ones. When you love and support, it is much easier to fight. Leave the surroundings of alcoholics and start the treatment - they should deal with qualified narcologists and psychiatrists.

Output

It is clear that you want to save your loved one. But this is possible only if he wants himself. And then you can help him - contact a narcologist and psychiatrist, to go to psychological advice (behavior is particularly effective in working with dependent, but the main thing is if the patient will feel your love and support, then you can all.

Alas, in some situations the patient is not aware of the problem, or it does not prevent him. In this case, it is worth discussing everything in a sober mind and come to a solution that will save your family. If the patient does not make anything for his own recovery, then do not be afraid to leave - because every day it is becoming more dependent, and your family is more and more unhappy.