Consultation for parents.

What if the child does not want to remove toys behind him?

When a child appears in the house, then sooner or later mom and dad begin to grab the head "around the toys." Remove yourself - not an option if you are not going to do it all your life. In addition, a person in life is needed by skill of accurate treatment of things and the organization of space and workplace, and the mother and dad will not be able to be nearby.

Faced with the fact that the child does not want to clean the toys, parents understand that the time was missed. But you can fix the situation and find a way to teach a child to remove toys.

Sooner or later, each parent begins to annoy the toys scattered around the house, because their collection begins only after the child has already fallen. But everyone wants to raise a responsible person adapted to life in society. Do not think that the elementary skill on the collection of toys is not useful in the future. If, after a two-year-old, parents are still cleaned by the defeat in the apartment, then on a five-year-old child, just begin to shout. But it's stupid to demand even from the five-year plan so that he will take and gather his toys if the parents did not start him to teach it as soon as he began to understand the speech and could carry out the slightest requests.

Fencing the child from the elementary work on the house and the fulfillment of the simplest duties, adults provide him with a "bear service". After all, even in kindergarten this skill will be needed.

What to do if the child does not want to remove toys? Immediately it is worth noting that the child's learning to remove the toys is already when it starts to actively scatter them alone. That is, children at the age of 1-1.5 years should not be considered too small for this, because this useful skill can be consolidated somewhere under 3 years.

Taking into account the fact that the children love to repeat everything for adults, first of all, it is necessary to ensure that there is order in the house. It is difficult to instill love for clean if it is not. Parents should start with themselves: do not scatter things, do not leave the cups all over the apartment. It is better to start cleaning toys when the child has already played out, but not tired.

One-year-old kids can be asked to put 1-2 toys in place, be sure to remind exactly where it is located. Typically, kids perceive it as a continuation of the game and with pleasure they do such a request. Over time, the volume of removed toys will increase the kid, and mom will surely wait for the day when he himself will remove them.

The impact methods associated with restriction, intimidation, indicating are not appropriate, as sooner or later they will lose force. And in some situations there may be harm to the mental health of the child and help the development of complexes and fears.

Several principles are allocated, which are most important in the process of child's teaching toys.

First, an example. Unlikely you can explain the baby that contain your things in order conveniently and you need if your things are scattered throughout the house.

Secondly, the game. Yes, anyone even the most stubborn baby will not remain indifferent to the sincere desire to adult to play or compete. Children gladly sort objects in colors and destination, looking for a house lost bunny or ride by car in the garage.

Thirdly, understanding. The child must definitely understand "why it is necessary." When children understand the meaning of our requirements, they understand what they need to do this action, they make the right conclusions and in the future take it as the necessary natural process. What is it for? Try to explain it first myself, and then the child is already.

If toys interfere with you, but are in the gaming zone, it's not yet a reason to clean them. But if you have on the table, it's like that you would take his place for games with your things - explain it to him.

Scattered toys must interfere with the child to realize it. Do not remove them before this moment.

Do not seek lost things for him, explain that if you put them in place there will be no such happening.

If he came and broke a toy, explain why this happened, but do not rush to buy a new or repair, so he may not have time to experience a sense of regret and realize the situation. Instead, he may think that in this way it is convenient to seek buying a new toy.

Fourth, enter the rules. Limit the place of disorder, for example, to get toys no more than fit on some particular space. Or take only 1 box only, removed the box pulled the next one. Distribute toys on the boxes so that they constitute full sets for the game better together with the child, as well as find pictures to the boxes, to create the conditions for the development of independence (he himself will choose which box to take, because he knows what inside).

And fifth, encouragement. Do not forget to praise the child, even if he removed just one thing. He is such an assistant. Help him, maybe it will be easier for him and more fun, there is nothing wrong with that. It is not your weakness, it is a natural desire to help you close, and then let him help you remove your things and you will go down together, for example, drink tea.

I hope that these simple five principles will help you raise a natural desire to abide by the child to follow and get after the game.

G. lavane in learning - Systemity: It is necessary to clean the toys every day, and not depending on the mood of the parent or child, the exception is only the days of the disease.

One option is the presence of an incentive: you can promise the baby to read the fairy tale or allow you to watch the cartoon only after it will remove all the toys. If cleaning takes place in the evening, before bedtime, then toys can also be placed.

For children who categorically refuse to collect toys, you can make a special box in which all scattered things will go. Mom collects them itself, but toys from this box are not given to the child for several days.

What to do if the child does not want to remove toys behind him.

Many parents do not want to put up with such a position when children, playing with toys, refuse to remove them. Some of the parents believe that the child can do everything that he wishes, and adults must provide him with freedom in everything and should not force a baby to any actions. Of course, each family has its own characteristics and habits. Of course, you decide whether to teach a child to Ak-Curability and order, and if you teach, how and from what age. But if you have decided to teach a child to clean up for co-battle toys, then you will succeed faster if you fulfill a few uncomplicated rules.

First of all, please remove toys should sound special. Cleaning should not be punished, desired, but so that it becomes the final part of the game.

If the baby is still so small that it does not understand the meaning of what is happening is not ready to fulfill your requirements, I will definitely remove the toys with him, be sure to say out loud that you remove where and why. If such a co-inspiration is carried out systematically, every evening, in a friendly atmosphere, the child will soon take care of it alone.

In addition, the child most likely will not appear habits to clean the toys, if you do not remove things every day: clothes, shoes, books, newspapers, decorations. Then the things are scattered around the apartment will become familiar with the usual phenomenon. After all, for a child of an early age, a characteristic feature is imitation ...

In order to facilitate the baby harvesting procedure, you can use the labeling on the boxes or on the racks. For example, on the box in which the machines are stored, you can figure out the machines, to portray the ball on the ball with the balls, etc. Niki-Tin B. P. advises, in order to make it easier to put cubes in the box, on her Put a sheet with a markup where and how to put cubes (markup can be both black and white and color). Of course, in this case, it is necessary to take into account the age and the possibility of a child. If you have the necessary time and ter-singing for this, you can turn the cleaning of toys into an entertaining game. In the chapter "Games for parents and children" describes one of them ("Momi Moma"). You can offer the child to change roles. Let him be mom, and you are a daughter or son. Getting Starting toys, following your new roles. It is a child who pays pleasure, and you will receive information about how ma-lits perceives you and your requests (or orders).

Do not leave an event for cleaning toys in a late evening if it provokes the emergence of negative emo-cues and you and the child. If the cleaning turns into a pack of farewell with toys, in laying them to sleep and becomes the necessary-time ritual for the kid, then, of course, it should be done immediately before bedtime.

If you yourself think that cleanliness and order in the house of the uncommon, then firmly enter the rule to remove toys behind you. Let the child know that you will read him a book or rice-to-carry with him only in a clean room. But the child should know that this is a rule for all family members. If you find a child an ultimatum: save toys - I will read you, you will not save - I will not, then the baby will most likely conclude that the mother's or daddy love and attention is necessary to "earn" every day.

SO, If the child does not want to remove toys:

· Decide for yourself, whether it is necessary.

· Be an example for a child, remove things.

· Clean the toys along with the baby.

· Cleaning toys, talk with the child, explain to him the meaning of what is happening.

· Formulate a request to remove toys good. Do not order.

· Use labeling, circuits on boxes and drawers for toys.

· Take into account the age and possibility of a child.

· Come up with an interesting game so that cleaning has become welcome for the baby.

· Make the cleaning of toys ritual before placing the baby to sleep.

About why children do not want to be removed and how to turn cleaning in a developing occupation. " In the upbringing, it does not require excessive softness, nor severeness - it takes reasonableness. " Saint Philaret, Moscow Metropolitan (C)

"The child played and at some point it is necessary to remove toys. Many parents try from early childhood to teach the baby to clean the toys and many at the same time suffer fiasco. Let's try to figure it out. In my opinion, the largest important moment in the child's childbirth to the cleaner of toys is the number of toys from modern children and the organization of their storage.

Olya and Katya - girlfriends. They are almost three years old. Mom girls also regularly communicate. Mom Kati is constantly complaining that Katya does not remove toys and mom every evening have to make cleaning instead of Kati. Olya Mom has no such problem.

Let's look home to every girl and see what happens evenings.

Kati has many wonderful toys. Whole toy paradise. Because of abundance, Katya does not even know what toys do it have. All Katins toys are neatly stored in large boxes in the children's room. More precisely, I would like my mother. Perfectly. In reality things are so. Every evening Katya and mom before bedtime begin to remove toys. More precisely, Katya continues to play, and mom is unsystemantly fills empty containers toys and closes the lids. Cubes and dolls and a doctor set fall into one box. In another box, we will find cubes again, part of a set of dishes, rings from pyramid, etc. The room acquires an externally tidy look. A dozen of large multi-colored containers carefully stand around the perimeter of the room. In the morning Katya starts playing. She does not know what he lies and therefore simply drops toys from each container to the floor. The room begins to remind a landfill. Katya rushes in toys, her attention switches from one toy to another.

What is the problem? Mom organized the life space of the girl without taking into account the characteristics of the child. Let's imagine that someone else "helped" with the organization of storage of your items. You allocated a lot of pretty boxes and chaotic folded your things there: jeans, part of the underwear, sweaters, in the second week, pants, and blouses, etc. were folded into the first box. And you do not know what and where you lie. Searches for the desired thing takes a lot of time. You want to decompose everything neatly, but the abundance of things makes it difficult to guid about. Are you ready to carefully remove your things in the closet every day if there are again for the floor every day? Do you have enough strength for this? More likely no than yes. Just occasionally happens with Katya. The number of toys in the girl is so great that she lacks energy to remove them. That is why it has to do mom.

And what about Olya?

Oli has little toys. Maybe even little. Couple of dolls, dishes for dolls, doctor set, machine, designer, pyramids. At first glance, it may seem that in the Olyas room cabinets more than toys. Indeed, a substantial part of the room occupy low racks, on which toys neatly unfolded. Dolls are sitting on the shelf, some toys lie in plastic boxes or baskets, designer in the box. Olya remembers all his toys and knows where she lies what a toy. Mom never shifts the things of the girl. Therefore, Olya never spends time in search. She just pulls out the shelf what she needs. And after the game removes. Yes, sometimes it turns out to be removed not all, sometimes some details rolled under the bed. It happens that Mom Oli in the absence spends some time to decompose something that lies not in place. But it is impossible to call cleaning ..

Do you seem strange that Olya removes toys? And in fact, there is nothing strange here. Each child has an inner traction to order. It is even stronger than an adult. But the adult is able to organize his life and achieve order in affairs and things. And the child needs help. The child is very important to know that everything always lies in their places, and he can find the right thing where it should be. But if the things of the child move, as in the case of Kati, then the child does not live in a state of order. Therefore, the task of parents is to organize the space of the child's life so that the kid does not have a large number of toys so that every toy has its place. Then the child will be able to maintain order.

Separately, it is worth talking about various parent claims and requirements. Do parents always adequately adequate and always a child can perform them?

Faith (3 years) loves to draw. She can sit at the table and draw. Faith loves colored drawings and has excellent color perception, it very thinly feels shades. Therefore, faith buy very large sets of pencils, 30-50 pieces. Usually faith organizes their workspace like this: lay out all the pencils that she has and draws. The girl has a special shelf, where albums are stored, stands with pencils and paints. After drawing, faith usually puts pencils into the cup, removes the album. But the Wrawn Dad does not like the process of organizing drawing. It annoys the table riddled with pencils. He says: "Is it really difficult to keep pencils in a glass? You draw in one pencil! You need to take one pencil, draw, put it in a glass and take another. And so you have a mess on your table, "dad is indignant. Vera tries to please dad. She puts a glass in front of him, but then the pencils still find themselves on the table: so it is more convenient to choose. And dad is angry.
What do we see in this example? Requirements that not only do not correspond to the child's age, but also contradict common sense. The problem is rather in Pope's pedanticity than in faith. It is a dad worth considering his views towards a smaller desire for general order. "

Diligence through the game

There are still options how to turn the process of cleaning the game directly. Given psychological factors, you should not also forget about age and accessible game methods in order to educate hard work. Using a little fantasy, you can teach the child to maintain order without developing negative associations to the cleaning process.

Scene-role games.

The game is and pleasant and useful for children. You can imagine a construction and cleaning technique that collects garbage (different toys) and sorts them. Typewriters can take dolls on homes, large cars can collect small to themselves in the "garage". Vacuuming monster in case of refusal of specials. Schedule to fulfill their task can salt all scattered toys, and they will need to urgently save.

Inventions.

Creative way to cause interest - come up with useful inventions for cleaning. This can be anything from the girlfriend. For example, from an unnecessary cardboard box, you can make a jet toys. A carpet, which collects all trivia, can become a piece of cardboard. This method develops creative thinking, expands the horizon, because it is necessary to come up with something new and useful.

Time ads.

Since the cleaning of toys is sooner or later turns into a routine duty, you have to invent something non-standard to maintain interest. So, you can declare the cleaning time of concrete things. For example, "Lego time" on the call of the bell or whistle - and the child removes the designer. Gradually, such tactics can be brought to the game. For example, prepare a list with a list of things and two cubes. One cube indicates a category of toys, the other to the quantity. So, the child throws cubes and performs the task. Not only interesting, but also useful - you can learn how to learn. And when this shape is getting tired, you can dilute the game with pleasant tasks with cards, somehow squirrels on the rings, a minute of rest, etc.

Quest, not ultimatum.

Favorite parent "You will not watch the cartoon until you bring order," you can transform into a fascinating quest for the child.

If there is time - it is better to draw a map of 7-10 stations. The child travels from one station to the other and on each of it there are local residents and give tasks. Residents of one city need to clear the bottom of the lake (wash the sink), the other - to help collect a harvest (all the same scattered lego), the third is asked to work in the garden (pour flowers). And at the fourth station, residents can simply treat the traveler with an apple. The ultimate goal of the travel (cartoon) also matters, although most children are passionate and the process itself - adventures, waiting for new meetings.

Family Saturdays.

You can start common family days. For example, general cleaning to deal with everyone together so that not only mom, but all family members connected. Thus, children will feel part of the cleaning process, and not by observers from the side. Daily you can take a 10-minute cleaning rule before dinner, for example.
Sometimes collaborative work can temporarily give way to the competition. It is convenient to hang on the refrigerator to hang on the refrigerator, where everyone will mark the dishes or made the garbage wash. And a week to summarize and reward the winner. Even if adults will continue to do everything in the usual way, the child's excitement is enough for everyone.

Awards.

Whatever the game you have chosen, do not forget about the praise and awards. Of course, the motivation of cleaning for cartoons or candies is not pedagogical. Glasses scored during cleaning games should be a pleasant trifle - a sticker, an interesting postcard, a children's magazine. The child will be interested in to save and earn these glasses if he can spend them on something substantial, for example, going to the museum or zoo. The prize can be assigned in advance. And you can write a list of different awards with rates, let the child choose himself.

The intelligence in the upbringing that the saint Philaret spoke should be in the case of teaching labor. Of course, young children are easier to pass through the game, and it is necessary to do this, because it is better so than ultimatum, punishment and the development of negative associations with the spent nerve parents. In addition, the games are developing fantasy and logic, one way or another teach systemic thinking and accuracy. However, children grow, and the concept of the game should gradually be replaced by the concept of responsibility. The order and cleaning of toys, and then and the personal things, and then the rest of the house should become a responsible business, and, ultimately, children must learn to love labor. Let in early childhood it will be for the sake of glasses and awards. But the adult, the child will be useful to understand that it works not only for himself, but also for others. Surrounding grains of hardworking in childhood will definitely give good fruits in the future.