Consultation (junior, middle, senior group) on the topic: "Social and sexual education in kindergarten". Socio-sexual education in kindergarten. Consultation for parents and educators Sex education for preschoolers in preschool
Please advise what to do? My son goes to a regular kindergarten. He recently told shocking things to my husband and me! There is one boy in their group, my son told us that this boy "gives injections to everyone in the group." Our question is how? He told us that he shoves a finger in the children's ass, he also constantly shows his genitals and ass in the toilet. I began to find out from the teachers what was the matter. To which they explained what it was, to the question why he was doing this, the boy replied that mom and dad did the same to him, they do the same to each other. The teacher also said that this child showed “what his parents are doing” and on another boy, filling him on the floor. This child behaves badly all the time in the garden, does not obey, offends all children. He replies to the remarks of the educators - “be quiet, woman, my parents will come and you will be khan”, etc.
When the educator talked to the father of this boy, the father said that he was a boy and should behave like that. Our educators are struggling as best they can, trying to put something good in this boy, but there is absolutely no point in this, since at home all this is being destroyed by parents. I'm just afraid for my son!
Tell me what to do? Where to turn, but so that our educators do not suffer?!
Hope.
Answer: Hello! Many parents face the problem you write about. But not everyone is ready to talk about it. And you need to speak! Each child at a certain age goes through a necessary stage of development, in which the little man begins to show interest in gender issues: “there are boys and girls”, “how boys differ from girls”, “how children appear”. This is the early stage psychosexual development of the child, in which very important foundations of sexual development and sexual culture of the individual are laid. The future well-being depends on the sexual education of a preschooler.
These issues deserve special attention in the process of raising any child. And therefore, parents should take matters of sex education into their own hands (no matter how hard it is for you to start this conversation and, of course, all conversations in accordance with the age of the child). If the child begins to ask such unexpected questions himself, then do not get lost, do not pretend that these are terrible and indecent questions. Your reaction, on the one hand, will frighten the baby, on the other hand, it will puzzle, and all together lead to the fact that he will no longer ask you. And if he does not receive answers from you, he will look for them elsewhere (bypassing you). And he will look for them with special interest, remembering your reaction. Of course, you can give the child for sexual "education" to the Internet, the yard, "colleagues" in the kindergarten, but in this case there is a big risk of crippling the baby's psyche and getting a deformed personality in the future.
In the event that you calmly, without giving out a special unusual reaction, tell the child (in accordance with his age) how boys differ from girls or read a book in which these questions are told in an accessible form, then the child will satisfy his curiosity, and up to a certain age will not be interested in this topic. For a small child, no special sexual education is required. It is enough just to answer his questions accurately and calmly. As the child gets older, you will need to answer the same questions in more detail, based on the information you have already given him. Remember that in the process of such educational moments you lay the foundations of the child's personality, his sexual culture, form a healthy, stable psyche in the child. The purpose of education is to form a person who can safely and steadily interact and build his life independently in the adult world. By laying the right foundations for psychosexual development in a child, we are raising a healthy (physically and psychologically) little man. If a child gets everything he needs in a family, then going outside the house (in the yard, kindergarten, on the Internet, etc.), our baby will be able to independently resist the negative information impact (he will have good children's interests and a corresponding good environment of friends) .
We, as parents, are very worried about our child and wish him only good and pleasant situations. But life, as a rule, teaches its lessons. And we understand that we will not be able to constantly control with whom, how and on what topics our baby communicates, we will not be able to keep him at home or constantly change kindergarten, class, friends (of course, if we are not talking about the mental or physical health of the baby - if health and the life of the baby is in danger, then, do not hesitate and protect). But we can help our baby to become strong and independent - to speak and discuss at home all the issues that interest the child; pay attention to him and love him, maintaining a favorable and open environment at home.
Touching on this topic, one cannot but say about the adverse (severe) situations that can happen to a child. I'm talking about sexual abuse. This is a complex psycho-traumatic situation, the consequences of which can be very deep and long-lasting. Forms of sexual abuse of a small child can be different, from showing the child's genitals to the abuse itself. Watching an adult sexual intercourse by a child can also be a traumatic situation. The peculiarity of the behavior of young children in such situations is that they are silent about it for a long time. Fearing the anger of adults, experiencing strong fear, kids can be abused for a long time and not tell anyone.
If your child told you about such a fact, do not scold him in any case, find out as many details as possible and seek help from law enforcement agencies, specialists (doctors, psychologists).
If your child talks about the unusual behavior of the “other boy” (another boy shows his genitals, imitates sexual intercourse), you should definitely talk calmly with your child, observe the behavior and emotional state of your son or daughter. If the baby calmly listens to you, receives answers to his questions, and you do not notice changes in his behavior, then perhaps you have successfully “closed” the situation for today. If you observe changes in the child's behavior, he is anxious, his sleep is disturbed, fears appear, he becomes isolated and does not communicate with you, then "sound the alarm." Contact a psychologist, a social worker in kindergarten, talk to teachers. The family of the "other boy" must be interviewed by specialists.
If you notice strange behavior in your child: an extreme interest in games of sexual content, amazing knowledge about sex for the age, imitation of sexual actions, then this should be of particular concern. Don't ignore this behavior. Talk to the child, talk to the kindergarten teachers, the nanny, observe the emotional state of the child - perhaps it has changed recently. Such advancing, dysfunctional sexual development of the child may be the result of sexual abuse, indecent acts against your child. If such facts are discovered, then save your baby, do not hush up the problem, seek help from law enforcement agencies and specialists.
Loving parents, a friendly and open atmosphere in the family, and a meaningful upbringing process are the key to a prosperous future for our children. Many difficulties arise in this way for parents, and sometimes we get lost in this world of unexpected and unpredictable troubles: How to protect my baby? How to grow it healthy? How to behave in a given situation? We are not taught in school how to raise children, we are not taught in institutes how to be parents. But we have a loving heart and the desire to make our baby happy. The main thing is that our desire should be meaningful and sound, that we approach the upbringing of our children as a serious process that is controlled by us, and the result of which is entirely dependent on us.
Olga Severnaya, practicing psychologist (17 years of experience),
author of research papers, lecturer at the Faculty of Psychology.
Sex education for preschoolers is a complex issue. Parents always drag out with "this" conversation.
Many wait until adolescence to talk to children about sex and things that go with it.
However, already in the preschool period, kids have the right to know some details, otherwise they risk being in a stupid position among their peers.
Modern history goes by leaps and bounds, and children grow up earlier. Already in the first class, half have a smartphone with unlimited Internet access. Some enthusiasts manage to pump up pictures of erotic content and shock their classmates with them.
Whispering in the corners, the girls tell secrets about conception and the parental bedroom, and at night they try to touch themselves in intimate places.
Particularly naive think that a stork brought their younger brothers or threw a head of cabbage until a biology teacher opens their eyes.
Boys make fun of girls who are the first to menstruate, as if there is something shameful about it. These are all flaws in parenting. After all the child of preschool age has the right to know how he was born.
At the age of three, a particularly interested baby can hear from you a fairy tale about mother and father's love, which unexpectedly happened in a magical kingdom. And after that, a tiny baby appeared in the mother's stomach. He ate everything that his mother ate, and grew, grew ... Until he suddenly felt terribly cramped.
Then he knocked, and my mother urgently ran to the maternity lock. There, the doctors opened a special door in the mother's body and the baby was able to get out. And everyone was very happy. Combine biological truth and fabulous fiction, but no storks, shops and cabbages!
Sex education for children aged 4-6 starts with books. There are many colorful volumes titled "How I Came" and "Where Babies Come From". They are a great help for parents in this difficult conversation.
The main thing is to wait for the right question and slip this tome on the child in time.
Anatomical details and pornographic pictures are, of course, not needed here. All you need is honesty, a vivid imagination, and a childlike curiosity. Let your child leaf through the book on their own and wait for questions to arise.
It is quite normal for a preschool child to hear the word sex. After all, it’s not the 50s in the yard for a long time, and it’s natural that mom and dad love each other and they periodically have sex, from which children are taken.
This occupation is exclusively for adults, because you have to bear responsibility for it. The resulting children need to be fed and educated, and for this you need to work hard and generally be big.
Some books mention the names of the genitals, while others invent digestible "nicknames" for them. For example, dad has a "faucet" in which many seeds live. And inside the mother lives an egg (“magic pea”). When they collide, a baby appears. It grows in mom's tummy and then comes out.
If you had a caesarean section, you can show the baby the incision site and explain that good doctors helped the child to get out.
How exactly to name the causal places is up to you. Of course, the child must understand that, although these are not curses, it is not necessary to shout them on the street and call girls names with them.
By the age of seven or eight, it is also important to cover the issue of menstruation and wet dreams.. Touch it in passing, they say, by the age of 12-14, a girl becomes a girl, and a boy becomes a boy.
All processes and changes are only signs of growing up, and there is nothing shameful in them. At 9-10 years old, talk about it in detail, and by 12, buy an encyclopedia.
The conservatives, of course, will not support you. They prefer to keep the team in the dark and not notice that when the teacher turns away, the kids throw off their panties in front of each other and try to understand how boys differ from girls.
Your task is to deprive the child of unjustified shame, to explain gender differences, principles of conception, the essence of gender psychology. After all, why do boys like girls and not boys? After all, it is so conceived by nature, only in a pair they can continue their race.
Not getting the right answer in time, the kid can start his own experiments and step on the fragile ice of homosexual research.
Among other things, a preschool child must understand what a condom is - he often encounters it on the street and can accidentally pick it up. Explain that this is not a toy and should not be touched. 
The boundaries of what is permitted in a conversation with a preschooler about sex are determined by you. Usually adults react much more painfully to bold answers than children. Everything is explained by our sexual education.
Even 20 years ago, no one would have thought to say to a six-year-old daughter: “Don’t come into our bedroom, dad and I are having sex.” Everyone went to tricks, to inventions, or even completely abandoned carnal pleasures.
No matter how funny or scary, keep a serious look. Your face should say: “You don’t need to giggle at this, it’s normal, but they don’t talk about it in the kindergarten and don’t shout on the street, that’s all.” It is you who know your child best, and understand when he is ready to talk about gender differences.
Feeling that you treat him as an equal, he will always run to you with his questions, and not to the Internet or an advanced classmate.
In the future, if any problem arises, you will be the first to know about it - after all, you gave the right sex education to a preschool child.
It would not be an exaggeration to say that the fate of a child, his development largely depends on how tactfully and correctly adults can give him an idea about the sexual relations of people. This topic is complex and controversial, but I hope that these materials will help parents find answers to at least some of the children's questions.
Mom, how did you know that I should have exactly my dad?
And when a cat has kittens, does it also have a human cat?
Do cats and dogs love too?
Can dad give birth?
These and similar “uncomfortable” questions can be asked by a small child to people in whom he feels trust at any inopportune moment, even without an obvious reason. This can happen on a crowded street or on crowded public transport.
Attitude of parents to sexual education of preschool children.
The reassessment in pedagogy of many norms that previously seemed unshakable has also affected this delicate problem. Today comes the realization that sexual education of preschoolers is necessary for the normal and effective socialization of the individual. Asking specialists a question on this topic: “Is it necessary to talk with children on“ adult topics ”? To whom, when and how? You can get the following answer: “Talking with a child on“ adult topics ”should be only if he is really interested in it and he cannot find answers to his questions on his own. To take the initiative and start talking to the child on these topics yourself is a huge mistake. Everything must be done on time!
When a child turns to parents with questions on sexual topics, you should not shy away from the answer. It is important to find words that would open this side of life to the child, to talk about serious and very important issues of human relationships in an accessible way. The further perception of the world of the child will depend on how successful these first explanations are, this conclusion coincides with the position of the domestic psychologists A. Zuskova and N. Smirnov. They believe: “If parents are not afraid of any children's questions, always find a truthful answer, do it in a form accessible to the child, without humiliating his dignity, they can count on constant contact with the baby and that they will accept their advice and help” .
What interests kids?
Experts note that it is at preschool age that a child’s interest will certainly focus on gender issues. Children's questions can be classified as follows:
A child of 2-3 years old is interested in his own body, genitals, he finds out the signs of the difference between a man and a woman;
A 3-4-year-old kid would like to know where children come from, who brings them, where he himself came from;
At 5-6 years old, the child's focus is on how children get into their mother's belly, how they get out of there and how they grow and develop;
At 6-7 years of age, the focus shifts to the role of the father in the birth of children; why children look like their parents.
Such curiosity is due to the fact that the preschooler not only observes events - he wants to understand their essence. He is interested to know what is happening around and why it is so, and not otherwise. The child cares about everything, he strives to get an answer to everything. Therefore, it worries adults with endless questions: “Where did I come from?”, “Why am I a boy, and my sister is a girl?”, “How did I come into the world?” And so on. Janusz Korczak, a well-known Polish teacher, is right when he says: “Children have no less thoughts, and they are not poorer or worse than adults, only they are different. That is why it is so difficult for us to find a common language, why there is no more difficult art than the ability to speak with them.
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Unfortunately, in the literature for parents, sexual topics are bashfully bypassed.
Communication between an adult and a preschooler on sexual topics
Without a doubt, preschoolers should receive answers to their questions in general and in particular on sexual topics in an intimate, confidential conversation with their closest relatives: mother or father, grandmother or grandfather. This is how it happens in most morally healthy families, where relationships between children and adults are built on mutual love, spiritual unity of generations, where they understand that any questions a child has are dictated by the desire to understand the incomprehensible, unknown. Parents there do not humiliate their son or daughter with suspicions of morbid interest and licentiousness, and are not embarrassed by the “piquancy” of the topic, but intelligently and intelligibly help the child understand different aspects of life. However, unfortunately, not all families have an atmosphere of love, harmony and mutual understanding. Not all parents have the appropriate education or the desire to acquire the necessary knowledge.
Therefore, to the question of a sexual nature, children often hear from adults the answer: “You are still small, you will grow up - you will find out!”, Which not only does not extinguish children's interest in this topic, but, on the contrary, becomes a certain catalyst, warming it up. After all, the inaccessible, the mysterious almost always enhances interest. The version of “cabbage and stork”, popular among older generations, has completely discredited itself. Imagine how the child will feel when he learns the truth. It turns out that adults deceived him, and try to prove later that this is the only lie you voiced. And the answers: “leave me alone”, “don’t bother me with your stupid questions”, “I’m busy, later”, “if you ask stupid things, I’ll punish you” only cause the child’s alienation from the adult, lead to the loss of children’s trust.
An atmosphere of readiness to answer all the child's questions without exception, the ability to tactfully explain the most difficult of them is an important condition for effective communication with a preschooler. On the other hand, anti-pedagogical attempts to circumvent sharp corners, guided by the considerations: “We were not told this,” “The time will come and they themselves will find out,” etc., unfortunately, often do harm. The time will come ... And if it comes too late and ruins the child's life? And if he finds out in a cynical way?
The doctor, publicist Vladimir Levy believes that adults can mentally cripple a child with “holy lies” in sexual communications, and gives an example when parents, trying to protect “childish purity”, invented a fairy tale for their son that “there are such flowers in the forest , beautiful, from which little men grow, ”in which the guy believed until the age of 12 and at the same time loved his parents passionately. Until the next guy in a rude form "enlightened" him on this issue. And here is the sad result - a mental disorder in a child and alienation from relatives.
It is important to create an atmosphere of trust so that knowledge that relates to gender is not overgrown with "street comments". Adults should be prepared for sexual questions from children. Remember Oscar Wilde: "There are no indecent questions - there are indecent answers." After all, a preschooler does not need specific stories about the physical and emotional side of sexual relationships. By the way, the child does not ask about this. It is only necessary to satisfy the curiosity of the baby at the level of his understanding.
For example, Rudolf Neubert, in the book “What will I tell my child,” writes that to the question “Why am I a boy and my sister is a girl?”, The son should be answered that he was born like a dad, and a daughter like a mother. If the baby asks: “Where do babies come from?” - You should answer: "Children appear and live in the body of the mother." To the question "How did I grow up?" - Answer: "From a tiny grain that was always in my mother's stomach." In the case when the baby asks: “How are children born?”, You can use this a possible form of the answer: "From a special hole, which becomes large at birth."
Of course, the process of satisfying children's interest is very individual. Superficial information is enough for one child, and another, of the same age, will not calm down until he receives a more detailed answer to his question. It all depends on his level of development and upbringing, what exactly and how the child asked, whether this question was accidental or arose as a result of an obsessive, relentless interest. The natural behavior of adults, the usual tone of conversation is one of the easiest and at the same time the most difficult conditions for communicating with a child in this case. It often happens that an adult, having heard a question from a child, is lost, embarrassed. And children are subtle psychologists: they immediately feel the insecurity or inadequacy of an adult's behavior. A deep sigh, a long pause, a puzzled look, or an emphatic ambiguity like, "It's good you finally asked that!" give the child reason to conclude that there is something unusual, unlawful in this topic. From this moment on, healthy cognitive interest turns into prejudiced curiosity: the child will no longer be interested in the very fact of the appearance of the baby, but why adults droop so strangely when talking about it.
If, until the age of four or five, a child does not turn to close relatives with questions on a sexual theme, this does not mean that such thoughts do not even occur to her. The fact is that adults wanted it or it happened by accident, but the child could get the impression that this topic is prohibited. Perhaps when he first showed interest in a "delicate" problem, his mother's panicked cry of "Why are you suddenly asking about THAT?" forever repulsed the kid’s desire to be frank with her and pushed him to the idea of the inadmissibility of discussing this topic with his parents in general. In this case, the child can hope to receive the information he needs from the caregiver. He may pose an indirect question or only hint or joke about the subject to test his reaction.
Sex education is common
The authors of scientific and journalistic essays on the problems of raising children in the family, G. Medvedev and A. Nadyarny believe that “with great success, the problem of sexual literacy is solved when children gradually, systematically, imperceptibly for themselves, receive the necessary knowledge on issues of sex and reproduction scattered among information of the most diverse nature, mainly asexual material.
For example, if there are animals at home or in a kindergarten that children look after and watch, they have the opportunity to naturally get acquainted with all aspects of their life: feeding, mating, giving birth to babies and feeding them. True information in response to children's questions and explanations of these processes to adults form in kids an understanding that in the animal and plant world there is a law of procreation, to which all living things obey. This is the only correct and relatively safe system of sex education, which helps to avoid hypocritical silences, and to some extent distracts the need for special, one might say, dangerous conversations on such topics. The child's imagination is distorted not by an objective truthful story, but by ignorance, which creates an information vacuum and grounds for conjecture.
Recently, a lot of literature has appeared, the purpose of which is to acquaint babies with the issues of having children. Adults should carefully and thoughtfully approach the choice of such books. Without a doubt, it is easier to buy a special encyclopedia and silently hand it to the baby for self-study. Which is exactly what most moms and dads do. However, some publications are too informative, and it is really too early for a three-year-old kid to know a lot of things. In addition, this issue in itself is delicate and very important, and close people will tell about it, even with the help of illustrations. After all, the pictures in the book will not convey the feeling of love, will not reveal the meaning of the origin of human life. Therefore, do not leave the child alone with such a book. It is better to consider, read it together. A conversation about the content of such publications requires great tact and skill from adults so as not to introduce something “special”, “shameful” into the sexual relation, so as not to cross the fine line between necessary and superfluous.
It is at preschool age that a child should receive immunity from obscenity and cynicism when communicating on sexual topics, learn in the future on their own, from literary sources, to draw the knowledge necessary for each person.
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Preschool age is the period when the deepest layers of the psyche and personality that affect the subsequent development are laid down and formed. The development of a child from the first days of life is the development of a particular boy or girl.
Sexual education of preschool children is a directed, systematic medical and pedagogical influence with the aim of shaping the personality of a boy and a girl, and optimizing their activities in all spheres of life related to the relationship of the sexes.
Sexual education should begin from an early age, when the child begins to understand the phenomena surrounding him. Then the understanding of sexual relations will remain with him for life. Sex education must be carried out constantly, on a daily basis, along with other aspects of education, in combination with moral, labor, physical, aesthetic education. It is they who give a growing person an idea of duty, beauty, develop the will, the ability to control aspirations and desires, including sexual ones, subordinating them to consciousness, moral principles, and norms of public morality. The problem of sexual education of children today is made relevant by such objective circumstances as acceleration, freedom of communication of young people, wide accessibility of the media; lack of parental control over the behavior of children; intimacy, sexuality of experiences, the tendency of children to keep everything a secret, etc.
There are several interrelated and interdependent aspects of sex education:
I) this is a complex psychological and pedagogical task, the solution of which pursues the main goal - to form a person's high moral positions in matters of sex. This includes such moral and ethical concepts as girlish honor, modesty, youthful (male) dignity, respect for a woman, decency in friendship, fidelity in love and much more reflecting the culture of behavior;
2) the social and hygienic side of sex education, associated with the preparation of boys and girls to fulfill male and female social roles;
3) a complex of medical and biological problems, which includes knowledge about the anatomical and physiological characteristics of the sexes, about the patterns of sexual development and maturation in conjunction with the general physical development of the body, issues of personal hygiene, health, etc. The generation of sex in the upbringing of children can later manifest itself in inadequate social behavior of adult men and women. As a result, girls and women lack such important feminine qualities as kindness, gentleness, tenderness; young men and men do not develop such masculine qualities as emotional stability, firmness, determination, responsibility. This makes it difficult for them to fulfill their social roles in family and public life. The problem of sex education is also relevant in connection with the need to prepare the younger generation for future family life.
Scientific research data show that boys and girls of preschool age have their own mental, physical differences, and in connection with this, different opportunities, which must be taken into account in their upbringing.
Highlights of Sex Education
1. Sex education is not a separate aspect, but one of the components of the overall upbringing of a child. You should not focus on this, everything should take place harmoniously, systematically, in accordance with the age of the child.
2. Sex education begins at birth, not at puberty. In early childhood, the foundation of the child's personality is laid, which is almost impossible to fix in the future. Therefore, it is very important that the child has formed the right ideas about the world around him already in preschool childhood.
3. Between the child and parents there should be a trusting relationship so that he can calmly, without fear and without embarrassment, ask questions of interest. The child must be sure that adults will listen to him and not punish him for it.
4. If parents blush and are ashamed of the awkward questions of their child, these are personal complexes and psychological problems of the parents, so it is necessary for parents to work on their stereotypes and not pass on their complexes to the child.
5. The generation of parents and the generation of children are different. Modern children grow up quickly, therefore, interest in intimate matters arises earlier than it was with their parents. Adults can only come to terms with this and do everything in their power to ensure that their child receives a normal sex education. And you can’t tell a child that at this age you were still interested in dolls (cars), and not boys (girls).
How to properly convey information to a child on sensitive issues
Babies only need to be told what they want to know. Questions should be answered seriously, calmly, briefly.
The child must be made to understand that conception, that is, sex, is not something to be ashamed of, it is not something dirty and shameful. It is very important that the child understands that intimacy, conception occurs through love between a man and a woman. How to convey all this to a preschooler?
Firstly, the reaction of adults to a child’s interest in the intimate sphere of human life should be natural, as if a child asks you why birds fly, why a cat has a tail, etc. The answer must be given immediately, without postponing it for later. And we must remember that the answers to such questions should not turn into lectures. A clear question is a short and clear answer. And of course, the answer should be clear to the child, correspond to his age, no need to go into details. It is enough for a child at preschool age to learn about this only superficially.
Secondly, you can not wait for the moment when the child himself wants to know information on intimate issues. But at the same time, you should not start a conversation for no reason, otherwise the child will definitely ask why they started talking about it, which will even more discourage parents. If you feel that the moment has come, if it is appropriate, then start the conversation yourself.
Third, the child should feel that you are kind to his questions. Therefore, in no case should you shout, shame, laugh. If the parents themselves have such a misconception and attitude towards the intimate side of human life, then there is no need to pass on your complexes to your children.
Fourth, if the child asked a question, then there is no need to evade the answer, otherwise he will look for information from unreliable sources - his peers, who can say things that adults are not even aware of.
The value of the family in the sexual education of the child
A kid living in a prosperous, calm family will quietly learn to perceive the relationship of the sexes normally, because his parents set a good example for him. The boy imitates the masculinity of the father, the girl imitates the femininity of the mother, and they do this without any special instructions. In addition, by observing their parents in everyday life, children learn how to behave with people of the opposite sex. If there is a good atmosphere in the family, the child will not have a desire to receive in relations with other people what he lacks at home (understanding, sympathy).
The most important thing is how we talk about it with children and how we actually confirm our openly expressed point of view. In other words, if sex education is, first of all, the formation of the right attitude to the issue, and not the development of specific knowledge in this area, it is obvious that parents should pay more attention to the psychological aspect.
What is sexual experience in young children?
Children's first and most common sexual experience is when adults touch their genitals. Children react to any touch to these organs. It is not difficult to notice an erection of the penis in a boy of 6 or 7 months when the mother washes it, dusts it with talcum powder, or wipes it dry. We are talking about purely sexual arousal of the organ, and this is a completely healthy reaction.
Children themselves touch their genitals, primarily in order to find out what it is, and very soon realize that these touches are pleasant.
All children sooner or later show a certain interest in the genitals, revealing anatomical differences in the opposite sex. These differences are noticed, if not at home, then in kindergarten or visiting one of your friends. It is only logical that children think about it and ask bold questions. All this is quite normal.
The baby often has a brother or sister. But even if he is the only child in the family, he has friends who may have little brothers or sisters. For the manifestation of a newborn, a mother usually prepares her child in advance, he himself also asks many questions and listens to what parents and adults who are in the house say about this. In a healthy modern family, children are usually frankly explained where babies come from, and this is also in a certain sense, although not a direct, sexual experience.
Another inevitable experience that leaves a deep impression on the child's mind is the day-to-day observation of his parents. Children see that mom is busy with purely women's affairs, and dad is with his own, masculine. All this, of course, helps the boy or girl understand their gender role in life. Thus, it is an experience of the highest importance.
Another experience - even if it does not occur very often - is acquired when the child witnesses the sexual intimacy of father and mother. Needless to say, it is categorically not recommended to allow such a thing. Due to a lack of understanding of what is happening, a child may experience anxiety, fears, and anxiety.
PROFESSIONAL COMPETITION OF EDUCATIONAL WORKERS
ALL-RUSSIAN INTERNET COMPETITION
PEDAGOGICAL SKILLS
(2012/13 ACADEMIC YEAR)
Municipal government institution
"Department of Education"
Dalnerechensky urban district,
Primorsky Krai
Municipal Budgetary Preschool Educational Institution "Child Development Center - Kindergarten No. 12"
Dalnerechensky urban district
(MBDOU "TsRR-Kindergarten No. 12"),
(692136, Primorsky Territory, Dalnerechensk, Teatralnaya st., 16)
Competition nomination: "Organization of the educational process"
Educational and practical guide on the topic:
"Socio-sexual education in kindergarten"
Seminar
"Socio-sexual education in kindergarten"
Target:
to acquaint teachers with the features of social and sexual education, to arouse interest among teachers in planning the educational process in preschool educational institutions using a differentiated approach based on gender and social characteristics.
Plan of the seminar:
1. Gender education in kindergarten.
2. Boys and girls.
3. The role of the game in the life of a preschooler. Toys for girls and boys.
5. Practical part.
Seminar progress:
1. Gender education in kindergarten
Biological and social sex - gender.
Billions of people live on planet earth. We belong to different races due to different skin colors due to different living conditions, we belong to different peoples because we speak different languages. Despite the fact that we are all so different, we have similarities. How does it manifest itself?
This similarity divides all people into two large groups: men and women. We, men and women, are so similar, despite the fact that we belong to different races and peoples. But we are so different, women and men, although we can even belong to the same family. What is the difference between men and women?
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And we differ genetically, anatomically and physiologically. We behave differently in society. In society, it is believed that what is characteristic of a man should not be done by a woman.
Give examples of genetic, physiological and anatomical differences between men and women.
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What can you say about the social roles of men and women?
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Man and woman are like day and night, like heaven and earth, like fire and ice. We are so different and dissimilar in our judgments, behavior, feelings. We behave differently in the same situation, we perceive the world around us differently. The difference in the perception of the world around us contributes to the fact that we do not understand each other. And misunderstanding is a source of conflict.
The difference between the sexes excited the minds of mankind. For example, in the XVII century. in Europe, it was believed that the female body is an underdeveloped version of the male. The basis of such an understanding was built on the social roles that a man and a woman played in society at that time. If we recall the history of the 17th century, it becomes clear that the role of a woman at that time was reduced to the reproduction of the family and the sexual satisfaction of a man. The woman most of the time was in the house of her parents or her husband, occasionally appearing at balls.
During the Renaissance, Europeans changed their view and began to believe that a man and a woman are organisms that are polar in nature. Social differences between men and women were determined by the difference in their biological status.
The division of mankind into two opposite sexes was based on the morphological features of a person (external and genital organs). But today biologists question the division of people into two opposite sexes only on these grounds. They distinguish several levels of human organization, which in various combinations determine the constitutional features of a person. These levels are:
Genetic sex (set of genes);
Gonadal sex (endocrine glands);
morphological sex (external and internal genital organs);
cerebral sex (sex differentiation under the influence of testosterone).
There are now changes in the morphology of sex in connection with the change in the social status of women in society. Women in many countries have gained equality, many of the women occupy a leading position among men. Truly masculine professions, as it was commonly believed in all ages, are now becoming available to women. In modern society, women are also engaged in heavy physical labor. American scientists have studied the changes in women from the 19th to the 21st century. Here are their conclusions.
The female figure, called the "hourglass" (narrow shoulders, thin waist and wide hips), like Marilyn Monroe, was replaced by the figure of our contemporaries - a rectangle (shoulders and hips of the same width). It is no longer a rarity when the figure of women resembles a triangle - a purely masculine version. Scientists have noted that some women have a coarsening of the voice and baldness of the head. It has been established that in such women, male hormones begin to predominate in the body.
Therefore, in modern science it is customary to clearly distinguish between constitutional and sociocultural aspects in the difference between male and female, linking them with the concept of gender and gender.
Floor translated from Latin means "to give birth." This is a biological difference between people, determined by the genetic structure of cells, anatomical and physiological characteristics and reproductive functions.
Gender- social status and socio-psychological characteristics of the individual, which are associated with gender and sexuality, but arise in the interaction of people.
“Genetic, endocrine and cerebral factors determine not only the psychological differences between a man and a woman, but also the level of mental and physical activity* (D.V. Vorontsov). This is motor activity and the activity of mental processes inside the body. And society always determines the means and boundaries of the manifestation of activity. Every society has its own criteria: what is possible and what is not. There is a culture in society that is assimilated by its members. Society through culture dictates the rules of conduct for men and women - a kind of rules of etiquette. It is culture that is a system-forming feature of behavior, which it calls male or female.
Gender is called social sex, since a person interacts with other people in society and his behavior can be different in different interactions. A biological woman, when interacting, can become a "man", i.e. her behavior resembles that of a man - she smokes, swears, behaves aggressively. At this point, her social gender is male.
Both sex and gender are systems of conventions that form a certain order of relations between people, their attitude to various manifestations of sexuality, and also determine the forms of presenting oneself to other people in various practices of social interaction.
Since 1970, there has been a debate about what determines human behavior and lifestyle - biology or environment. Can upbringing (culture) take precedence over biology and determine the actual biological sex itself?
From the moment a child is born, his upbringing begins. The child is taught what it means to be a girl or a boy, then a man and a woman: how to behave, what to wear, what hairstyles to wear. That is, from the moment of birth, gender socialization begins - the process of assimilation of norms, rules of behavior, attitudes in accordance with cultural ideas about the role, position and purpose of men and women in society.
A child was born. If you swaddle him, then the mother, not knowing who was born to her, will not be able to tell if she has a boy or a girl in front of her. But the biocurrents of the brain already differ in newborns in the frequency of impulses. In the meantime, newborns do not care who they are by gender. A child only after three years begins to realize his gender. Therefore, until the age of three, a boy can say: “I went” and “I went.”
The child begins from birth to learn about the world around him. Coming to the kindergarten, the child learns like himself the way he did with toys at home. He can bite a peer, poke a finger in the eye, can hug when the other is crying. There is a process of knowledge. The child begins to understand that he is different from others.
How to raise boys so that they grow up to be real men? What conditions for development should be created for girls so that real women grow out of them? This question has always arisen in society. Perhaps, separate education of boys and girls will contribute to successful upbringing? Let's turn to history.
From the history of separate education
In pre-revolutionary Russia, there was separate education for girls and boys, as it was believed that girls had less intellectual abilities. Children were given to the gymnasium by gender from the age of 9, after the teeth that replace the milk ones grow. The training programs were also different accordingly. Girls were trained for housekeeping, and boys were supposed to serve the society in the future.
In the XX century. In Europe, institutions began to be created with joint education and upbringing by sex. St. Petersburg followed suit. In 1908, the first commercial schools were opened with co-education of boys and girls. After the revolution, this practice continued. Co-education was considered progressive. Educators and psychologists emphasized that co-education contributes to the formation of friendship between opposite sexes. It was concluded:
Collaborative learning emphasizes gender equality;
Creates a basis for interpersonal contacts and joint work.
In 1943, the practice of separate education was again restored in connection with the July resolution of the Council of People's Commissars. According to this decree, different models of socialization were introduced depending on gender, since after finishing school, the boys went to the front.
It is worth recalling the policy pursued by the state in relation to men and women. And politics demonstrated a return to the traditional model of family and upbringing, in which the mother is the main figure responsible for the whole way of family life and the upbringing of children. The father was given a secondary role. The main purpose of the father is to serve the Fatherland.
This policy was also reflected in the separate education of boys and girls. The image of the mother, as dominant in family education, was the main one in women's education. In men's education, the image of a man - the defender of the Fatherland - dominated. In addition, both of them had to work for the good of their socialist Motherland.
The liberal climate of the school changed dramatically. The relations between boys and girls, who could now meet at rare joint evenings, under the watchful supervision of teachers, lost their comradely character, became eroticized and sexualized.
Under the conditions of separate education, boys and girls were brought up as two completely different groups of people with opposite essences and purposes. Due to numerous requests from teachers and parents, gender-segregated education was cancelled.
Separate education in Soviet schools led to the fact that the female intellect was not properly developed due to state policy, and the girls turned out to be unclaimed by the state ruled by men.
But co-education also has its downsides. The child's psyche suffers, especially the psyche of boys. The female and male body is arranged differently. And co-education makes sexual orientation mixed, i.e., feminizes men and masculine women. Girls, due to their advanced puberty (2 years difference), begin to play a dominant role, and boys become slaves.
The great disadvantage of our schools is that almost only women teach there. And this also negatively affects the behavior of boys. They adopt the female type of behavior. When explaining new material, female teachers “chew” everything due to their feminine characteristics, and the boys should be faced with the problem of searching, so it’s better for them to “underexplain” the material. The female teacher makes an obedience mindset. Boys, due to their characteristics, are rarely obedient because of their activity. And they are often rated not for knowledge, but for behavior. Boys at school more often than girls earn neurosis, because they get tired faster than girls because of their activity. For them, you need to do physical exercises more often. In a mixed school, it’s scary to walk along the corridor during the break: boys of different ages are running around. This is the rest of the body of boys after 45 minutes of sitting without active movements. And every parent meeting at school begins with the words of the class teacher: “Dear parents! Your children cannot behave at breaks. They will soon knock even teachers off their feet." And, indeed, they will, if you do not take into account the characteristics of the body of boys and girls.
In elementary school, all boys are scolded for sloppy writing and bad handwriting. When our children began to read, they began to check their reading technique. And again, the boys did not fit into the norm. Again, at the meetings, the parents of the boys were scolded that we did not pay attention to them. I wonder who introduced the standards for reading technique in schools, the same for boys and girls? One thing is clear, that these people do not know that females have almost 3 times more speech than males. A woman pronounces 20 thousand words a day, and a man - 7. Girls, unlike boys, are accurate, since their fine motor skills are better developed than boys.
Socially conscious education starts from preschool. After all, children come to kindergarten from the age of two, and the child begins to distinguish between genders at the age of 3. How to create an educational model that promotes the coincidence of biological and social sex in order to raise real men and women? Everywhere is good "golden mean". The "golden mean" is a mixed education and upbringing with elements of separation, it is a differentiated approach, taking into account gender characteristics. Let's try to build such a model. So where do we start?
In order to properly educate and educate, one must know well the object of application of one's pedagogical influences.