“The psychological climate of the family as an important component in the upbringing of a child. Psychological situation in a complete family

1.1. Psychological situation in a complete family.

At an early age, a child perceives an adult's attitude towards him as an assessment of his behavior, an assessment of himself as a whole. The child cannot yet understand that a bad or indifferent attitude of an adult can be caused by various reasons, he perceives such an attitude as an assessment of his personality. The constant impossibility of satisfying the child's need for a positive assessment from an adult causes a severe emotional state of dissatisfaction, a feeling of emotional distress.

In the absence of psychological and pedagogical assistance, the removal of negative experiences occurs due to the distortion of the child's ideas about his behavior. He becomes "impenetrable" to any negative (both fair and unjust) assessments of an adult. This is one way to avoid painful self-esteem doubts.

As V.A. Sukhomlinsky, a child who experienced an offense and injustice in early childhood, becomes painfully susceptible to the slightest manifestations of injustice and indifference. Each encounter with resentment, untruth again and again bites the child's heart, and the child sees evil even where it is not. In other words, dissatisfaction with the needs that are significant for a person leads to a distorted perception of the attitude of those around him. Then the child becomes more and more withdrawn into himself, opposing the real and apparent evil with what he is able to oppose - disobedience, obstinacy, harshness and rudeness, self-will, the desire to do everything not as adults require in order to remind about himself, to tell people about his the right to attention.

Such a child responds to the teacher's attempts to establish contact with distrust, since he is often internally convinced of hostility towards him on the part of others, that the teacher's words are false, that he seeks to deceive him, mislead him, how to lull his vigilance. Therefore, it often happens that even an experienced, sensitive teacher cannot always quickly come into contact with such a child, win his favor. The child responds to care, kindness, affection with distrust, and even rude, defiant behavior.

Of course, every family has its own nuances, difficulties and problems. An attempt to schematize all this and give an accurate classification of the types of child-rearing, where any particular family would "fit", is hardly feasible. Any particular case is always individual, like each person with his subjectivity and originality. However, it is possible to determine the main parameters of educational influences, the various combinations of which make up the types of family education.

Here we will consider only two, in my opinion, the main parameters of family education. This is, firstly, attention to children: the degree of control over them, the direction of their behavior; and secondly, the emotional attitude towards the child: the degree of emotional contact with the son or daughter, tenderness, gentleness in dealing with him.

Hyperprotection

Increased custody of the child, deprivation of his independence, excessive control over behavior - all this characterizes upbringing according to the type of hyperprotection. When parents, fearing “bad influence,” choose friends for their son or daughter, organize their child's leisure time, forcibly impose their views, tastes, interests, and norms of behavior - this is the dominant hyperprotection. Often this type of upbringing is found in authoritarian families, where children are taught to unconditionally obey their parents or one of the adult family members, whose will is carried out by everyone else. Emotional relationships are usually reserved here. Children do not have deep emotional contact with their father and mother, since the constant strictness of parents, their control and suppression of the child's initiative interfere with the natural development of children's attachment and form only respect and fear.

Upbringing by the type of dominant hyperprotection in a matured child causes either a hypertrophied reaction of emancipation, and the adolescent generally gets out of parental control, becomes uncontrollable (first option), or forms a conformal (adaptive, passive) personality type. In the second version, the child grows up weak-willed, in everything depends on the influence of the surrounding microenvironment or on a leader who is more active than himself. He does not develop a sense of responsibility for his actions, independence in decision-making, there is no purpose in life. He often turns out to be helpless in a new situation, unadapted, prone to neurotic or unproductive reactions.

Asocial groups attract such adolescents most often because they feel psychological security, the absence of "pressure" from their parents. They easily identify with other adolescents and willingly obey the leader, as they used to obey their father or mother. Typically, such metamorphoses occur during a long period of stay outside the home, for example, studying in another city, in a technical school, college; moving from the village to the city; going to work, etc. Left without a "guide", they are ready to follow the first person they come across who wants to "lead" them. For example, if such a teenager, having entered a factory, ends up in a brigade where it is customary to drink alcohol for any reason, then he, without hesitation, adopts this tradition, forces himself to drink, fulfilling the requirements of traditions, imitating the senior members of the brigade and unconditionally obeying them.

The dominant hyperprotection includes education in conditions of high moral responsibility. Here, heightened attention to the child is combined with the expectation of success from him much greater than he can achieve. Emotional relationships are warmer, and the child does his best to fulfill the expectations of the parents. In this case, failures are experienced very sharply, up to nervous breakdowns or the formation of an inferiority complex. As a result of this style of upbringing, there is a fear of a situation of tension, a test, which in the future often becomes an impetus for the use of psychotropic substances.

Increased attention to the child, combined with close emotional contact, full acceptance of all behavioral manifestations, means upbringing in the type of conniving hyperprotection. In this case, parents strive to fulfill any of his whims, to protect him from difficulties, troubles, grief. In such a family, the child is always in the center of attention, he is the object of adoration, the “idol of the family”. "Blind" love encourages parents to exaggerate his abilities, not to notice negative qualities, to create an atmosphere of admiration and praise around the child. As a result, children develop egocentrism, overestimated self-esteem, intolerance to difficulties and obstacles to the satisfaction of desires. Such adolescents consider themselves to be outside criticism, condemnation and remarks. They explain their failures by the injustice of others or by accidental circumstances. This position is formed and reinforced by the behavior of parents who always actively defend the interests of their son or daughter, do not want to hear about their shortcomings and expose everyone who “does not understand” their child or is “guilty” of his failures.

Naturally, a personality formed under conditions of upbringing according to the type of conniving hyperprotection very often experiences negative experiences at the very first encounters with reality. The deprivation of the usual atmosphere of admiration and uncomplicated satisfaction of desires causes social maladjustment in the adolescent, since he is perceived by him as a crisis situation. The inability to overcome difficulties, the lack of experience of experiencing negative emotions prompts him to use psychotropic substances, since they make it possible to quickly change his mental state without any effort (volitional, intellectual, spiritual).

It should be noted that adolescents who are brought up in conditions of conniving hyperprotection rarely come to the attention of a narcologist, not because among them there are less frequent cases of the use of psychotropic substances. It's just that parents are trying with all their might to hide the facts of alcohol or drug use. First, they try to justify their child, as if "not noticing" what is happening, or, explaining this behavior of a teenager by his subtle mental makeup, the need to stimulate creative abilities. Then the teenager begins to receive private treatment in order to avoid being registered with a drug addiction treatment. And only when a teenager commits a crime or all means of self-treatment have been exhausted, he goes to a drug dispensary, most often in a very neglected state.

Hypoprotection

If hypoprotection is combined with good emotional contact, that is, the parents love the child, although they are not involved in raising him, then such a child grows up in a situation of permissiveness, he does not develop the habit of being organized, planning his behavior. Impulses predominate, there is no idea that "want" should be in second place after "must". In such children, by adolescence, in fact, self-regulation does not develop, and their behavior is similar to that of unstable accentuators.

Upbringing in conditions of hypoprotection in combination with the emotional coldness of the parents and the lack of emotional contact leads to serious negative consequences. In this case, the child constantly feels his uselessness, deprivation of affection and love. He is seriously experiencing an indifferent attitude, neglect on the part of his father and mother, and these experiences contribute to the formation of an inferiority complex in him. Children, deprived of the love and attention of their parents, grow up embittered and aggressive. They get used to relying only on themselves, see everyone as enemies, and achieve their goal by force or deception.

Most often, the combination of hypoprotection with emotional coldness (up to emotional rejection) occurs in socially disadvantaged families. Where parents abuse alcohol, lead an immoral lifestyle, children are usually abandoned, left to their own devices, deprived of elementary care and attention. Here, children are often subjected to physical punishment, beatings and torture for the slightest offense, or just to "frustrate the evil." A difficult home environment prompts the adolescent to seek solace in the company of similarly disadvantaged peers. The ideas about life and its values ​​(antisocial behavior, alcohol abuse, principles such as “whoever has the power, is right”, etc.), learned from their parents, are transferred to this street group, forming their own criminal environment.

It is obvious that upbringing by the type of hypoprotection, in fact, leaves the child “alone” with life's difficulties. Deprived of the adult's guidance, protection and support, he experiences negative emotional states much more often than an unformed personality can withstand. Therefore, together with the ability to overcome difficulties, to look for a way out of a frustrating situation, a teenager is looking for a way to relieve tension, change his mental state. In this case, psychotropic substances act as a universal means for him to solve all his life problems.

In addition to the main types of improper upbringing discussed above, there are many more subtypes, where various elements that make up the main ones are intertwined. Actually, in their pure form, these types of upbringing are found in real life much less often than their combinations. This is primarily due to the fact that at present the family does not represent such a unity as it was in the last century. Often now, family members treat the child in different ways, each creating their own conditions for upbringing. For example, a father can bring up a son as hypoprotection combined with emotional coldness, a mother can raise a son as a dominant hyperprotection combined with increased moral responsibility, and a grandmother, with whom a grandson spends most of his time, as a conniving hyperprotection. What will grow out of such a child? Hard to say. But we can say with confidence that the conditions for the formation of his personality are extremely unfavorable.

In any family, there are certain dominant relationships. Being both positive and destructive, they set the general atmosphere of family life, predetermine its comfort, cohesion of family members, their interdependence from each other. It is about nothing else than the psychological climate within the family.

"Psychological climate" - what is it

In simple terms, the family psychological climate is the mood that prevails in a relationship. It is no secret that quarrels and misunderstandings occur in any family, but if conflicts are the norm ("not a day without a scandal"), we can say that the psychological climate of this family is unfavorable. On the contrary, if a trusting, respectful relationship prevails between spouses, children, and the atmosphere will be appropriate.

A good psychological climate gives family members confidence in each other, a sense of support, security, responsibility for their family and pride in belonging to it. On the other hand, a negative climate creates anxiety, alienation from the family, and emotional discomfort. Therefore, the formation of a positive family climate is essential for a happy marriage.

Fostering a family atmosphere

To improve the psychological atmosphere in the family, you must first of all abandon (if possible) the pronouns "your", "mine", "I", replacing them with "our" and "we". This seemingly trifle acts on a subconscious level, eliminating the effect of alienation from other family members and at the same time does not single out someone into a separate unit.

Another desirable attribute of psychological family comfort is eating together. Let dinner be a little later, but both spouses and children will gather at the table. Phones, computers, TV is better to exclude, giving preference to personal communication. For example, you can discuss who spent the day how, find out plans for tomorrow or the near future, solve difficult issues that require support or participation of loved ones. This practice creates a sense of community, "shoulder", giving the person a sense of belonging to the family.

Joint conduct of everyday life is of great importance. Unfortunately, when one of the spouses is working late, it is unlikely that household chores can be divided equally. And yet, it is necessary to define some kind of business that family members will only do together. Let it be Saturday cleaning or cooking Sunday lunch, or maybe a joint shopping trip, but always involving both spouses and all children.

Of course, family vacations also play a role. It was noted that families with a common hobby and family traditions are less likely to quarrel over trifles. You can make it a rule to go every weekend, for example, to football or to the movies. Or maybe just go out for a walk with the whole family. It is good if there is an opportunity to go somewhere during the summer or winter holidays - the anticipation, anticipation of a joint trip will also have a positive effect on the general family atmosphere.

However, do not forget about the personal space, which should remain with each of the spouses, even in the most friendly family. Sometimes both husband and wife need to be alone. Someone needs to "run away" from home, for others it will be enough to sit quietly at a book, forgetting about family matters. Such a respite will allow you to relieve the accumulated fatigue without harming the marriage relationship. It is not for nothing that any work is entitled to a vacation - after resting, a person will return to the family hearth full of energy and positive emotions.

The formation of a favorable intra-family climate is a daily process that requires the participation of all family members, but does not imply any financial investments or labor-intensive actions. It is enough just to love, respect your loved ones and appreciate their presence. And then the atmosphere inside the family will be filled with bright feelings.

Report on district parent meeting

« The psychological climate of the family as an important component in the upbringing of a child. "

Tasks:

1. Show the importance of the psychological climate in the family for raising a child.

2. To expand the knowledge of parents about the types of parenting and their impact on the development of the child's personality.

Plan:

1. The role of the family.

2. The psychological climate in the family.

3. Types of upbringing and their impact on the development of the child.

4. Viewing the presentation "On raising children."

5. Reflection.

Equipment, materials: laptop, presentation "On raising children", O. Nikolaeva's blog "Besedochka" for work on the types of upbringing, handouts for each "Statements and aphorisms about raising children."

PERFORMANCE:

The family acts as the most important factor in the development of personality. Here the child is born, here he receives the initial knowledge about the world and the first life experience.

Probably many will agree with me that it is the family, family education that plays a major role in the development of a child of both preschool and school age. The child should be raised by parents, and all social institutions (kindergartens, schools) can only help them in providing conditions for the child's self-development, helping him to know his individual inclinations, inclinations and realize them in an acceptable form, useful for himself and society. Family education has a wide time range of impact: it continues throughout a person's life, takes place at any time of the day, at any time of the year.

What the child acquires in the family in childhood, he retains throughout his life. The importance of the family as an institution of upbringing is due to the fact that the child is in it for a significant part of his life, and in terms of the duration of its impact on the personality, none of the institutions of upbringing can compare with the family. It lays the foundations of the child's personality, and by the time he enters school he has already more than half formed as a person.

The family can act as both a positive and a negative factor in upbringing. The positive effect on the personality of the child is that no one, except for the people closest to him in the family - mother, father, grandmother, grandfather, brother, sister, treats the child better, does not love him and does not care so much about him. At the same time, no other social institution can potentially do as much harm in raising children as the family can do.

The family is a special kind of collective that plays a basic, long-term and important role in upbringing. It is in the family that the child receives the first life experience, makes the first observations of how to behave in various situations. It is very important that what we teach a child is supported by concrete examples, so that he sees that in adults, theory does not diverge from practice.

PSYCHOLOGICAL CLIMATE

The more or less stable emotional mood characteristic of a particular family is called the psychological climate of the family. It is a consequence of family communication, i.e. arises as a result of the mood of all family members, their emotional experiences and worries, attitudes towards each other, towards other people, towards work, towards the events around them. In a family, people spend most of their lives; they are connected with each other by the most intimate feelings and relationships. Therefore, the psychological climate is a complex of psychological conditions that facilitate or hinder family cohesion.

The psychological state, development of the child is influenced by the emotional state of the parents themselves, the relationship between family members. All kinds of quarrels, alcohol abuse, scenes of physical harm to parents to each other, frequent swearing in front of a child negatively affects his emotional state. And if these cases are constant in the family and the child, in connection with this, experiences constant stress, then a neurotic state may arise.

The emotional state of the child, in turn, affects the intellectual development of the child. It is noted that the mental abilities of children and young people growing up in a negative social environment are definitely lower than those growing in a favorable social environment.

There are 2 types of psychological climate: favorable and unfavorable.
A favorable psychological climate of the family is characterized by the following signs: cohesion, the possibility of all-round personality development, a sense of security and emotional satisfaction, pride in belonging to one's family, responsibility, self-criticism and benevolent criticism of any family member are well developed, mutual tolerance and correctness in cases of discrepancy opinions. Here the law of life is the desire and ability to understand another person. An important indicator of the psychological climate of a family is the desire of its members to spend their free time in the home circle, to talk on topics of interest, and to do homework together.
Basically, parents spend most of their time at work, where their relationships, moods and, having come home, we sometimes do not think that our loved ones, mainly children, suffer from the fact that their parents are in a bad mood, there is no one to talk to. Sometimes we bring all negative emotions home, breaking down on our children. The unfavorable psychological climate of the family leads to quarrels, psychological tension, depression.

What happens to children? You can often hear from teachers that the child misbehaves in the lesson, interferes with the lesson, etc. But at home he is completely calm, polite. Why? This happens in the same way as with the parents. At work we try to look carefree, but when we come home we become unbearable: everything annoys us, we don't want to talk to anyone, i.e. we get rid of all the negative emotions that we have accumulated over the whole day, and the child suffers, i.e. we transfer our problems and worries to our child. This happens all the time and turns into an appropriate lifestyle.
Ever since primary school age, we can observe how a child lives in a family, how he feels in it. You can not ask about this, but watch how the children play, during the game they transform into their parents, copy their actions (put them in a corner, swear loudly, etc.)

According to statistics, a child is given 17-30 minutes per day. This time decreases with age.
The child is brought up by the entire daily life of the family, the relationship between its members, to work, rest, etc.
“Your own behavior is the most decisive thing,” wrote Anton Semyonovich Makarenko. “Do not think that you are raising a child only when you talk to him, or teach him, or order him. You bring him up every moment of your life, even when you are not at home. How you dress, how you talk with other people and about other people, how you are happy or sad, how you communicate with friends or enemies, how you laugh, how you read the newspaper - all this is of great importance for a child. The child sees or feels the slightest changes in tone, all the turns of your thought reach him in invisible ways, you do not notice them. And if at home you are rude, or boastful, or get drunk, and even worse, if you insult your mother, you are already causing great harm to your children, you are already raising them badly, and your unworthy behavior will have the most sad consequences.

The true essence of upbringing work, you yourself have already guessed about this, probably does not lie at all in your conversations with the child, not in the direct impact on the child, but in the organization of your family, your personal and social life, and in the organization of the child's life. Educational work is, first of all, the work of the organizer. In this case, therefore, there are no trifles. "

It is very important that the skills and habits of behavior that are formed in the child at school are consolidated in the family. Unified, coordinated requirements of the family and the school are one of the conditions for proper upbringing.

TYPES OF FAMILY EDUCATION

(BLOG assignments)

10 major mistakes parents make
in raising children

1. Inconsistency... This is a very common mistake. If the kid is mischievous, the parents scold him and warn him about all kinds of restrictions. But some time passes and mom, forgetting that she recently threatened the child, cancel a walk in the park or watch cartoons, as if forgetting about her own promise, leads to the rides or turns on the animated series.

Consequences: the child grows up self-willed, he ceases to take seriously the words of his parents. It turns out, as in the proverb: "The dog barks - the wind carries."

2. Inconsistency of demands on the part of adults... Often there is a situation when completely different requirements are imposed on the child in the family, for example, the mother wants the child to clean up the toys after the game, and the grandmother does it herself. Often, disputes about the correctness of a particular position are conducted right in front of children; opposing coalitions are created in the family.

Consequences: a child can grow up to be a conformist, adapting to the opinions of others. It is also possible to show disrespect for the parent, whose position the child perceives as unfavorable for himself.

3. Uneven attitude towards the child... More common in families consisting of a child and a single mother. The mother then kisses the child, playing with him, then withdraws into herself, not paying attention to her child, then screams and gets angry at him.

Consequences: a hysterical person will grow up who does not know how to control her behavior. Detachment from the mother is often observed due to the fact that the child does not know what to expect from her.

4. Connivance... The child does what he sees fit, regardless of the opinions and desires of the people around him. For example, when he comes to visit, he begins to demand that he be given a thing that he likes, although it is fragile and the owners value it, or during Sunday lunch in a cafe, he begins to run around the hall, pestering strangers who have come to rest. The parents of such a child are perplexed: “So what? He's a child! "

Consequences: you are guaranteed to grow up a terry egoist and impudent.

5. Spoiledness... It manifests itself in the fact that parents constantly follow the child's lead, fulfilling all his desires, often at the expense of infringing on their own interests or the interests of other people.

Consequences: This miscalculation in upbringing leads to the fact that the child grows up self-centered and callous.

6. Excessive exactingness, excessive severity... Exorbitant demands are made to the child, the most harmless pranks and mistakes are not forgiven him.

Consequences : lack of self-confidence, , often perfectionism, which can become an unbearable burden for a growing person.

7. Lack of affection... Bodily contact is extremely important for a little person, however, as well as an adult. Unfortunately, sometimes parents find it unnecessary to show affection for their child.

Consequences: the child grows up introverted, distrustful.

8. Unbridled ambition of parents. Adults in the family try to realize through the child what they themselves have not been able to achieve, regardless of his interests and desires. For example, they send him on a voyage not so that he physically develops and strengthens his health, but solely out of the desire to make a champion out of his child.

Consequences: if the child is not attracted to this activity, then, growing up, he will protest in any way. If the activity is to one's liking, but it does not justify the aspirations of the parents, then low self-esteem and dissatisfaction with oneself are formed.

9. Excessive control... A person must have a certain space so that he can make his own choices. Sometimes parents completely ignore the child's desires, taking control of any life manifestations (choosing friends, tracking phone calls, etc.)

Consequences: as in the previous case, a protest against unnecessary guardianship in the form of departures

10. Imposing a role... More often observed in families where mothers are lonely or there is no emotional connection between parents. The mother begins to talk about her failures, discuss other people, imposing problems that the child is not ready to perceive.

Consequences: mental stress that is unbearable for a child can cause pessimism and unwillingness to live, the proper distance between an adult and a child is erased.

Family drawing technique

gives an idea of ​​the child's subjective assessment of his family, his place in it, his relationship with other family members.
Based on the analysis of the drawings of the children of the class, several general trends in the development of intrafamily relations can be distinguished:
if you want to know how your child feels in the family or how he treats relatives, offer him the task: "Draw your family"

If the child has drawn himself in the center, do not worry - he draws from the position of his vision. This is his world, in which he is the main sorcerer.

If he draws only himself, then he is lonely.

Usually, after himself, the child draws the one whom he considers to be the main one in the family. If he painted the pet second, then the child is lonely.

If someone has not drawn, he may be offended at him.

And if a child draws all relatives holding hands together, then in your family he is surrounded by love and attention of loved ones.

If the family does not communicate much, then the child does not draw mom and dad far from each other, with an obstacle.

If someone is depicted without a mouth, without arms or with very long arms, then the baby is afraid of this person because of the fact that they are shouting at him, severely punished.

If he draws someone with thumbs (like a "scarecrow"), the child seems uncomfortable in the world.

Legs are disproportionately thick - a tense atmosphere in the family; very long legs - striving for independence.

For a loved one, the child will take the same paints with which he painted himself.

A very contrasting image is a sign of a conflict that is not resolved for a child.

If the child is energetic, active, he will choose warm colors.

Cold colors - dreaminess, thoughtfulness are inherent in the character of the child.

Love for freedom, independence - if painting, jumps out of the outline with a pencil.

Neat shading, but in the presence of unpainted stripes says
about insecurity, defenselessness.

TESTING

(presentation)

REMEMBER! (presentation)

USEFUL LITERATURE

Annex 1

Characteristics, manifestations:

parents impose their opinion on the child.

"Suppression" of the child

Eternal directions, reminders, sovers

The child does not meet his own needs, but the needs of his parents, providing them with a more comfortable life

Possible consequences:

decreased interest in the world around and the formation of lack of initiative;

can lead to the development of personality traits such as shyness and self-doubt, or, conversely, aggressiveness and negativism;

The child becomes "deaf to the parent", waiting for the usual threats or raising his voice to begin to do what he is told.

upon reaching adolescence, the child may want to quickly break out of a too rigid system, where his interests are ignored, and find freedom

growing up, a child can fall under the influence of any other authoritarian system: sects, political parties, criminal companies, in which he will also be obedient to be ruled

becoming an adult, either he himself will acquire a very authoritarian character, or he will become an executor of someone else's will: passive, dependent and suppressed.

Parental motives

Against the background of the child's lingering problems, parents sometimes lose faith in his ability to be responsible or to do at least something on his own and well.

If the child does not have chronic problems, the parents' motive may be to compensate for the inner feelings that they experienced in childhood, when they felt that they were not noticed and not taken seriously. Parents' search for opportunities to assert themselves and feel their power sometimes ends with the use of children for these purposes.

Hyper-care type

Characteristics, manifestations:

Parents do their best to protect the child from possible dangers ("Do not climb the stairs, you will fall").

The child is protected from any difficulties, worries, negative emotions and experiences.

There are no requirements or responsibilities for the child.

They are afraid that all sorts of misfortunes will happen to their child.

Possible consequences:

Promotes the development of dependence, difficulty in making decisions, inability to find a way to resolve a previously unknown situation;

In critical cases - passivity and avoidance of solving a life problem.

The child will be poorly adapted to adulthood.

Infantile-consumer attitude to the world, the child has a delay in the development of skills.

Painful response to any demands and restrictions.

It will be difficult, and sometimes impossible, to cope with your feelings: grief, anger, resentment, which later still come in real life.

Difficulties in communicating with peers, when you have to independently defend your interests and solve emerging problems.

The child denies the justification of parental fears. He looks for opportunities to take risks and can act incredibly reckless.

Parental motives

This parenting style usually reflects the emotional problems of parents from their childhood, when they may feel unnecessary. The motive in this case is obvious: to feel knowledgeable and competent, important and needed, while caring for a chronically helpless child.

Hypocritical (conniving) type

Characteristics, manifestations:

Parents are not very interested in the child, he is left to himself.

The child lacks attention, care, warmth

It can be observed both in families with low incomes, where parents are forced to work a lot, and in families that are well-off in material terms, where parents are busy with their lives, dress and feed the baby perfectly, buy toys, but have practically no contact with him.

Possible consequences:

The absence of rules and requirements leads to the fact that the child does not have a solid support, a sense of security;

The child has a feeling of uselessness, that he is not loved

Parental motives

This is how parents can behave:

Who, throughout their own childhood, felt ignored, rejected, rejected, and not cared for enough;

Democratic type

Characteristics, manifestations:

Parents are considered to be in charge they own the bulk of the power and responsibility, but when deciding important issues, the interests of the opinions of children are taken into account.

The child is well aware of his limitations, responsibilities, area of ​​his responsibility

The parent is involved in the growing up of the child.

Possible consequences:

The child is aware of his needs and understands the desires of others

The child acquires emotional stability, self-confidence

Self-reliance, responsibility, the ability to cope with many of life's difficulties corresponding to age.

Appendix 2. Statements and aphorisms about raising children

The best school of discipline is family (Smiles S.)

The main meaning and purpose of family life is the upbringing of children. The main school for raising children is the relationship between husband and wife, father and mother. (Sukhomlinsky V.A.)

Do you know what the surest way to make your child unhappy is to teach him not to be denied anything. (J.J. Rousseau)

Many troubles have their roots precisely in the fact that from childhood a person is not taught to manage his desires, they are not taught to relate correctly to the concepts of can, it is necessary, it is impossible. (Sukhomlinsky V.A.)

Nothing acts in the young souls of children stronger than the universal power of example, and yet by all other examples no one else is impressed in them deeper and more firmly than the example of the parents. (Novikov N.I.)

The guilt and merit of children falls heavily on the heads and consciences of their parents. (Dzerzhinsky F.E.)

Our children are our old age. Correct upbringing is our happy old age, bad upbringing is our future grief, these are our tears, this is our fault before other people, before the whole country. (Makarenko A.S.).

Parents often confuse the concepts of "upbringing" and "education" and think that they gave the child upbringing when they forced him to study so many subjects. Hence the frequent disappointment of parents in their children in subsequent years. (Rubinstein A.G.)

TOPIC: The psychological climate of the family. Compatibility types

ü To give students an idea of ​​the essence of the psychological climate, of the main factors affecting the formation of the psychological climate in the family.

ü Awaken the desire to take responsibility for a favorable psychological climate in your future family.

ü Fostering the desire to create a prosperous psychological climate in your future family.

BASIC CONCEPTS:

Psychological climate

Psychological compatibility and incompatibility

DURING THE CLASSES

I. ORGANIZATIONAL MOMENT

II. HOMEWORK CHECK

Work on cards.

III. MESSAGE THEME AND PURPOSE OF THE LESSON

IV. PSYCHOLOGICAL CLIMATE

Each person is a member of small and large groups and collectives. His personal happiness and his desire to study, work, be friends, and love largely depend on whether a person is good in a given group. And it is good for him when he has a favorable relationship with the people around him, when he experiences emotional well-being in the group. As one hero of the film "We'll Live Until Monday" said: "Happiness is when you are understood." Therefore desire and skill understand another person constitutes the basis of the psychological climate of any - the smallest (he and she) and the largest - group, any collective.

Psychological climate or psychological atmosphere - it is the emotional mood prevailing in the group and the team.

The psychological climate is determined by people's moods, their emotional experiences and worries, their attitude to each other, to work, to the events around them.

Favorable psychological climate	Unfavorable psychological climate
Mutual understanding Respect for each other Camaraderie Understanding Cohesion Feeling secure Everyone's feeling of emotional well-being Internal discipline Integrity A responsibility

A healthy psychological atmosphere is not given to the team by someone and for something. It is developed by all members of the team and depends on their efforts, on their cultural development in personal formation.

V. DISCUSSION OF SITUATIONS

Situation 1.

Dima D., student of grade 11 b:

“Our class is democratic, we do not have any“ elite ”. All are about equal and very complementary to each other - one is stronger in one, the other - in another, but no offense. Nobody imposes their opinion. We offer and organize a lot ourselves. If someone is sick, if it is difficult, they will help, they will always come to the rescue. We never get bored. I think that the brighter the people in the class, the cooler the class. "

Borya K., student of the 11th grade:

“Our class consists of people who are absolutely not interested in each other and do not seek to communicate. Everyone lives their own life. We are too different, and everyone's hobbies are different. Therefore, there are companies, groups. Our main problem is the division of the class into "asset" and "liability", which is not interested in anything. What can be done? It’s okay if you have such a composition. In our class, everyone lives by themselves. So do I. I don't want to be disturbed. "

Determine the nature of the psychological climate in each of these classes.

Do you feel his influence on these guys?

What determines the psychological atmosphere of the class?

First of all, the psychological atmosphere is determined attitude of a person to business, for the sake of which a group or collective exists, and satisfaction with work.

Mood one person is very often transmitted to other people with whom he communicates, works, studies, lives.

The general atmosphere in the group is greatly influenced by the degree of self-confidence.

Respect the dignity of another person as well as your own, - it is very difficult business, especially with constant communication. This is where a person's ability can help put yourself in the shoes of the other person.(I don't like being criticized in front of strangers, but what am I doing? I don't like being called not by my name, but by a nickname, I get upset and worried. Why do I myself do this?).

Only a family where the spouses live by great public interests and demands can truly be happy. Selfish, philistine aspiration does not bring people happiness. Personal happiness outside of society is impossible. Happiness is always a feeling of the fullness of one's spiritual and physical strength in their public use.

Vi. PSYCHOLOGICAL CLIMATE AND COMPATIBILITY

The greatest influence on the psychological climate is exerted by the degree of compatibility of people. Dissimilarity of characters is a fairly common motivation for divorce.

Compatibility - it is the consonance of values, interests, emotional attitudes, general lifestyle.

Vii. TYPES OF COMPATIBILITY

Psychological compatibility is a complex phenomenon that has several varieties (levels).

1. Ideological and moral community of people.

The coincidence of the spouses' views on the content of basic values, their moral attitudes, the assessment of these values ​​(for example, work, family, fashion, etc.).

Drunkenness, personality degradation.

2. Socio-psychological compatibility.

Education, age, circle of acquaintances, general cultural level of spouses, their upbringing.

Consistency of views on the birth and upbringing of children, the organization of life.

3. Psychological and psychophysical compatibility.

Personality characteristics, character and temperament of the spouses.

Relationship to parents.

A sense of responsibility for your family.

Constancy of feelings, emotionality.

The most strongly incompatibility will manifest itself with the similarity of some negative character traits: selfishness, irresponsibility, laziness, etc.

VIII. CONCLUSION

A positive climate in the family, as in any other group, can be created not only with similarities, but also with differences in the temperaments and characters of the spouses.

IX. ANCHORING

ü If both spouses have no negative traits, can compatibility always be achieved?

ü Husband and wife have different degrees of sociability - one wants to be at home, only with his family, while the other wants to meet with friends, invite guests. When is compatibility possible, and when is it not?

X. LESSON OUTLINE

It is important to learn to understand each other, to strive to overcome the difficulties of living together, to balance your desires with the aspirations of another person.

Compatibility is not given from the outside, it is developed by the mutual efforts of the spouses.

Family happiness is not a gift of fate, not the result of blind luck, it is the work of the spouses' own hands, their intelligence, kindness, humanity and, of course, love.

XI. CHALLENGE TO THE HOUSE

Describe Perfect Matching Pairs:

1) friendly: a young man - a girl, a girl - a girl, a young man - a young man;

2) young spouses;

3) elderly spouses.

Literature:

G. P. Razumikhina et al. "Ethics and psychology of family life." M. Education, 1987.

Important indicators of a favorable psychological climate in a family are the desire of its members to spend their free time at home, to talk on topics of interest to everyone, to do homework together, to emphasize the dignity and good deeds of everyone. Such a climate promotes harmony, reducing the severity of emerging conflicts, relieving stressful conditions, increasing the assessment of one's own social significance and realizing the personal potential of each family member. The initial basis for a favorable family climate is marital relations. Living together requires from spouses a willingness to compromise, the ability to reckon with the needs of a partner, to yield to each other, to develop such qualities as mutual respect, mutual trust, and mutual understanding.

When family members experience anxiety, emotional discomfort, alienation, in this case they speak of an unfavorable psychological climate in the family. All this prevents the family from performing one of its main functions - psychotherapeutic, relieving stress and fatigue, and also leads to depression, quarrels, mental tension, and a deficit in positive emotions. If family members do not strive to change this situation for the better, then the very existence of the family becomes problematic. The psychological climate of the family is expressed in the prevailing attitudes and moods: enthusiastic, joyful, light, calm, warm, anxious, cold, hostile, suppressed.

With a favorable microclimate, each family member feels equal among equals, needed, protected and confident. He feels the family is a kind of refuge, where he comes to rest, or a well, where he draws life-giving freshness, vigor and optimism. The main thing in a family is a sense of self-esteem and a desire to respect the right of everyone to be a person, and not just a husband, father, master of the house or a partner. A favorable psychological atmosphere is associated with such communication, which is not a burden to any of the family members.

A favorable psychological atmosphere is present in a harmonious family. In such a family, the joy of life is felt. All the inhabitants of the House are sure that they will be listened to with interest and joy. Everyone here knows that they are reckoned with and always take into account the position of others. Therefore, people openly show their feelings: joys and sorrows, successes and failures. In such a family, people are not afraid to take risks, because they know that the family will understand that the search for something new is always associated with possible mistakes. Mistakes indicate that a person is growing, changing, improving and developing. In a harmonious family, everyone feels in their place, and they are what they want to see themselves - recognized and loved. They are used to looking at each other, not at the ceiling. And even babies look open and friendly. A tacit calm reigns in the family (but not indifferent silence for fear of being misunderstood). A storm in such a House is a sign of some very important activity of family members, and not at all an attempt to start a quarrel. After all, everyone knows: if they do not listen to him now, it is only because there is no time for this, and not because they do not love him. In such families, people feel cozy and comfortable. Adults and children do not hide tenderness and at any age show it not only in kisses, but also in the fact that they openly talk with each other about themselves and their affairs.

Family is a complex system of relationships between spouses, parents, children, and other relatives. Taken together, these relationships make up the family's microclimate, which directly affects the emotional well-being of all its members, through the prism of which the rest of the world and their place in it are perceived. Depending on how adults behave with the child, what feelings and relationships are manifested from close people, the child perceives the world as attractive or repulsive, benevolent or threatening. As a result, he develops trust or distrust in him. This is the basis for the formation of a positive self-awareness of the child. Emotionally favorable relationships in the family stimulate feelings, behavior, actions directed at each other in all its members. The well-being of a person in the family is transferred to other areas of relationships (to peers in kindergarten, school, to work colleagues, etc.). On the contrary, a conflict situation in a family, a lack of spiritual closeness between its members often underlie developmental and upbringing defects.

To maintain a favorable climate in the family, it is necessary to maintain the communicative sphere of life at the proper level. Communication between parents and children is an important point in giving the house a positive psychological atmosphere. The main law is to feel comfortable when communicating.

The formation of a favorable psychological climate is influenced by the type of family, the position taken by adults, the styles of relationships and the role they assign to the child in the family. Under the influence of the psychological climate, the personality of the child is formed.