How to understand a man - the main rules. How to understand a man. Male psychology is a delicate matter

It's difficult for women. Their gestures, actions often seem strange or cruel. Read the article on how to understand a man in various situations.

How to understand a man's feelings

Unlike women, it is more difficult for men to talk about their own. As a result, there is a misunderstanding on the part of women. Then the question arises: "How to understand the feelings of men?". It will be better if you trust your intuition. By asking a question directly, you can frighten or ruin a nascent relationship. A woman should pay attention to the signs that a man sends and understand them correctly.

  • If a woman is attractive to a man, he will in every possible way draw her attention to himself.
  • His behavior changes markedly in the presence of a woman he likes.
  • A man in love almost always seeks to communicate.
  • Also, a man in love is jealous.

How to understand what a man is hiding

Girls are used to open their feelings. With men, everything is more difficult: even in marriage, they manage to hide their feelings. Why do they do it?

  • In the modern world, excessive emotionality is exclusively a feature of the weaker sex. From this it follows that the manifestation of tenderness and banal joy translates men into the category of weak and unmanly.
  • Showing various feelings - a man considers himself vulnerable.
  • Some people like to watch the first steps on the part of women.
  • Many people think that love is a synonym for the word weakness.

To hide their feelings, men use a range of techniques.

Indifference

It is much easier to hide your feelings if you close yourself with a wall of indifference. Most often, this method works during quarrels - a man closes himself in order not to allow a woman to cause even more pain.

Frankness

A man suddenly shared some secret or memory with you - this means that he trusts you, but is not ready to talk about it directly.

Attention and care

To please, the stronger sex begins to show itself from the best side. And let the brain give the command to be silent, the actions that take place on a subconscious level will bring any man to clean water.

A man can hide his feelings, but it will be much more difficult for him to refrain from not giving advice, not helping him with his own words.

Causes jealousy

Often, men deliberately force women to them, and watching the reaction, they are waiting for the right moment to be there and take care.

How to understand that a man wants you

Not everyone gets a straightforward man who can easily come up and say: "Darling, I've been thinking about you all day." Various things done by a man on a subconscious level will help women read the thoughts and desires of their loved ones.

hands in pockets

The very first and most striking position in which a man who wants sex gets up is his hands in his pants pockets, while his thumbs look out. This position indicates that the man is ready to indulge in caresses.

Pay attention to shoes

If you notice that a man is completely turned towards you, and the toes of his shoes are also turned towards you, you know that he will not refuse to continue communication in a more intimate setting.

Looks beautiful

The most simple and noticeable way, which is often confused with shyness. A man, at the sight of a woman he likes, begins to smooth his hair, straighten his cufflinks or tie. With such gestures, he tries to draw female attention to his beauty.

Lip touch

If a man wants to touch your lips, then he will in every possible way draw your attention to his lips. Often this happens with the help of fingers. At such moments, women can either accept these hints or ignore them altogether.

world for two

If a man stood in your way, covering you from the outside world with his hand, pressing you against the wall, you can judge that he doesn’t just like you. This position indicates that the man creates a kind of world for the two of you.

unequivocal view

Eyes can tell a lot about a person and his desires. If you notice a sexy and exciting look in a man, know that only desirable women are looked at like that.

These signs are basic, and indicate a desire for intimacy. At such moments, women should behave culturally, otherwise you can frighten off a man.

How to understand that a man loves you

There are two signs that allow us to conclude that a man really loves.

Feelings are reflected in behavior

Pay more attention to the actions and behavior of a man, and less to words. After all, he can say one thing, but think differently about himself, and only deeds can prove the authenticity of these warm and affectionate words. Think often about what he does for you.

Is he willing to share his resources

The main resources that a man has are:

  • time;
  • Friends;
  • humor;
  • life experience;
  • material;

A man is ready to share his resources with his beloved woman. Ask yourself what from this list has already been shared with you.

  • Does he spend his free time on you?
  • Does he introduce his friends to you?
  • Are you ready to help in difficult times?

How to tell if a man loves his ex

If your beloved man often remembers the name of his ex, compares you with her, then he still has feelings for her. There are five signs that will help you make sure that your man is still in love with his ex:

  • constant talk about her (he is the initiator);
  • her photographs are still kept by him;
  • during sex, it seems to you that the man is not with you;
  • he constantly compares you to her;
  • asks you to make friends.

Do not perceive the former as a rival, do not become her just to please your man. Teach him! Give him new emotions and sensations, do not go into conflict. Give him various compliments, praise him. If this does not help and you understand that your loved one is still passionate about his former passion, leave him ... Such relationships do not make sense, since they will stand in one place, and every day it will only hurt you more.

How to understand that a man is married

Many men, entering into relationships with women, hide the fact that they already have a beloved wife. In order not to get into such a situation, pay attention to the behavior and. A man who definitely has a wife looks too well-groomed and neat. Also, the ring finger will help you, especially if it happens in the summer, there should be a characteristic mark on the finger from the ring, which was previously removed. he will never let a woman into his house and will insist on meeting in a neutral place, he will be extremely happy if this is your apartment.

How to understand that a man left his wife

After the departure of a man from the family, one can observe a noticeable transformation in his behavior.

  • He becomes interested in your life. He stops complaining about his wife and does not use you as a pillow for tears, as he used to.
  • After sex, your lover is in no hurry to leave. He feels the need to stay with you for a while to drink coffee or just lie down in bed.
  • Less posts on the subject of sex. He becomes interested in how your day went, how you feel, etc.
  • You are allowed to call at any time of the day. Call restrictions are gone.
  • More and more often you talk about getting married. And if earlier he answered dryly, now there is a smile on his face.

How to understand that a man does not need you

Often women love their men so much that they do not notice the lack of feelings in return. When a man wants to stop communicating, this happens according to the standard scheme.

  • Stop calling first.
  • After some time, he does not answer calls or SMS, justifying himself by saying that he “got on the phone” or “the connection did not catch well.” If this is repeated for a long time - it's time to think about whether everything is fine in your relationship.
  • Infrequent joint trips to various places, for example, a store or a restaurant.
  • In the presence of you, various calls are received on the man’s mobile phone, to which he answers dryly. And to the question "who called?" standard response: colleague or friend.
  • You stop spending all your free time together. Joint pastime weekends are becoming less and less.
  • The man is increasingly detained on various "important" matters.
  • At events, he is in splendid isolation, leaving you bored at home.
  • When meeting with you, he often looks at his watch.

If you feel that the connection with your man is lost, talk about the first one. And you will see with what joy and relief he will agree with this.

How to understand a man's intentions

Starting a relationship with a woman, a man can pursue various goals. Does he want a serious relationship? Or is he looking for a woman for one night? About what intentions a man pursues can be told by his actions, words and even a glance.

talking look

When communicating with a man, pay attention to his eyes. If his gaze is directed to various objects, especially women, ask him a question that requires reflection and an accurate answer. The man's eyes were running, and he is in no hurry to answer? This should alert you. Most likely he is not interested in you, or he is hiding something.

What he won't talk about

A man who is really in love with a woman will never start talking with her about his past, or rather about what women were before her, and even more so compare past relationships with the present. Pay attention to how he compliments. The banal words that very often sound from his lips are most likely empty and insincere.

Behavior

A man in love starts and worries about the woman he loves. He remembers all the problems that his beloved has and tries to help her cope with them. He is ready at any time, postponing important matters, to run to his only one in order to help her.

Three Signs of Seriousness

Serious intentions can be judged by three signs.

  1. Getting to know friends is a very important act for any man, so if your beloved has decided on such a thing, consider it as a clear sign of a serious relationship.
  2. He tells you almost all his personal things, shares his innermost thoughts and ideas. For men, opening their souls is almost the same as showing their weakness, so they are able to tell everything about themselves only to their truly beloved and only.
  3. Getting to know your parents is a really serious act that may indicate an imminent wedding or serious intentions.

frivolous intentions

Do you notice that a man is talking more and more about your attractiveness and sexuality than about his interests, hobbies? A man who only wants sex from a woman never sincerely, the maximum that he is capable of - dry, not filled with feelings words on social networks or on the phone.

How to understand that a man is cheating

Male adultery is not such a rare occurrence in the modern world. More in this video.

How to understand a man by correspondence

In today's world, more and more people meet in social networks. It is much more difficult to understand a man by correspondence, because messages are not able to convey the whole range of feelings that are embedded in words.

  1. Going to your page on a social network, pay attention to whether he is online. If yes, then notice how soon he wrote you a message. If not, do not write off reminding about yourself and save your greeting for later. Most likely, he is used to the fact that you are the first to start a conversation.
  2. After you strike up a conversation, pay attention to how often he asks questions and whether he tries to keep the conversation going. Even a banal story about how his day went can mean that he cares about you.
  3. In pursuit of getting to know you better, he will ask deeply personal questions. Watch his reaction to your answers. If he tries to somehow comment on each of your answers, this may mean that he is really interested and this is not feigned.
  4. A large number of emoticons, exclamation marks and smiles may indicate the presence of flirting on his part.
  5. If he asks you for advice, on this or that occasion, this is a sign not only that he trusts you, but also respects your opinion.
  6. The end of the conversation plays a big role. If there is little emotion in his last phrase, then your communication is indifferent to him, and he is not at all upset that the conversation is over.
  7. Pay attention to how often he likes your photos, and whether he comments on your posts. If you are interesting to a man, then he will not disregard any of your photos.

If you understand that a man gives you sympathy on social networks, do not assume that in life it will be exactly the same. Often communication on the Internet is significantly different from real life.

How to understand a man by sight

Looks are so eloquent that they can tell a lot more about a partner than empty talk. Looking into the eyes you can understand what a man is experiencing.

  • If a man looks at a woman for a long time, then it is safe to assume that he feels sympathy.
  • Did the man raise his eyebrows while talking to you? This may mean that he is interested in you.
  • A look, as if by chance with a smile on his lips, indicates that the man is flirting.

Attention to the look

  1. If a man's gaze falls on a woman's forehead, then we can judge that he is only interested in business.
  2. If the look runs from the lips to the eyes and back, then the man is experiencing friendships.
  3. A long and continuous look filled with tenderness, accompanied by a smile, may mean that a man has a deep interest in his chosen one.
  4. If a man’s gaze lingers for just a moment, then it can be judged that he is experiencing certain feelings.
  5. A frowning face with pubescent eyebrows indicates that a man experiences antipathy.
  6. The look that runs all over the female figure indicates that the man views the woman as a sexual object.

How to understand that a man is lying

Often, many men play on the trust of their beloved women. Recognizing a lie at an early stage can help save the relationship, or provide an opportunity to prepare for a breakup.

How to understand that a man will return

After parting with a loved one, women think about whether he will return or leave forever. According to statistics, in 75% of cases, men try to return to their beloved family. The likelihood of a return may depend on many factors, for example: happily lived years, property that you have earned through joint efforts.

Signs that a man wants to return

  • After parting, the man communicates closely with your mutual acquaintances.
  • He constantly offers you his help. He is interested in how your plumbing works and whether all the lights are on.
  • A man is fully aware of all his mistakes and is ready to correct them. He is again trying to win over his woman and become her current man.
  • He tries to have an open dialogue with you. Talks about his problems, feelings and is interested in what is happening in your life.

Taking a man back is only worth it if you are ready to forgive him for the past without blaming him or remembering it for a long time.

How to understand a man? After all, sometimes it seems very difficult for women, because often a man can be completely silent and not express his own emotions. Sometimes even loving people in a couple find it difficult to understand each other. The longer the union of a woman and a man lasts, the more disagreements can arise between them, which can lead to quarrels and scandals. It would seem that it could be easier than to study each other over a long period of time, but not all couples fully accept each other. Often, women, because of great love, make sacrifices and adapt to their chosen one, while playing the role of a good wife. But hidden desires and protests are still able to find a way out sooner or later. Therefore, the main cause of all disagreements and scandals in a couple is misunderstanding.

How to understand the psychology of men

In order to learn to understand the psychology of a man, you should master the art of proper communication with him. You need to learn to speak the same language with him. Women often want from the representatives of the stronger sex what they are not able to give them, but not because they do not want, but because they do not understand what exactly women expect from them. You can understand the psychology of men if you learn to communicate your desires and thoughts to them, so it is important to learn how to correctly formulate the topic of conversation . Rolled eyes and puffed cheeks, questions like “what kind of relationship do we have after all?” representatives of the stronger sex are very frightened and alarmed, so they do not know how to react to them. Instead, you should just say what the woman wants and why. For example, a woman needs to be told directly about her desire for her chosen one to kiss when they meet, because this gives her confidence that she is loved, or for example, you should directly say that you want the chosen one to call back in order to avoid female excitement.

A woman who understands a man will not hurt male pride during a conversation, and will never compare him with other members of the stronger sex.

Each conversation with a representative of the stronger sex should end with certain conclusions, since emotional, long female introductions will be meaningless if there is no clear ending with a conclusion. The fair sex should not be surprised if their chosen ones answer with one phrase as a sign of consent. This is because all male thoughts take place in the head, and are not pronounced aloud.

How to understand a man - psychology

Psychologists say that part of the breaks and conflicts are due to a lack of understanding of the psychology of men and the inability of women to “steer” men, and the second part is due to unwillingness to grow up and male irresponsibility. Representatives of the stronger sex differ from women not only physiologically, but also psychologically, intellectually and emotionally. Everyone knows about it, but also everyone forgets about it during domestic troubles. And in most cases, this can help to avoid quarrels and resentment.

How to understand a man if a woman is sure that she is right. The advice of psychologists in this regard is as follows:

- it will be easier to understand a man if you learn the differences between a woman and a man;

- it is important to realize that by nature all men are conquerors and therefore the spirit of struggle is strong in them;

- they are more stubborn and persistent than women, they like to win attention and defend their opinion;

- women are more inclined to compromise, so it is advisable for them not to forget about it and show compliance in difficult situations;

- if a woman speaks without thinking about personal relationships, then a man acts without thinking, so you should not be offended by men who do something without thinking. Such is their temperament;

- often women do not understand that for the representatives of the stronger sex their appearance is not the most important, and they scold a man for, for example, wearing a tasteless sweater to visit. In clothes for a man, the main thing is to feel comfortable according to the situation;

- most women equate a male look at a beautiful girl with treason. It's not like that at all. The representatives of the stronger sex have a well-developed and eroticized vision, this can explain their involuntary excitement at the sight of a beautiful girl, but this does not mean that a man will run after another, so women should learn to perceive men adequately, not be offended, and not annoyed. This phenomenon can be compared with burning female eyes at the sight of a beautiful dress;

- you can understand a man, if you do not forget, this is a language of respect and love, which will help to unite with a man and complement each other harmoniously.

Often, women ask psychologists for consultations about how it works, which they do not always understand. And what do men really want? How do they think and how best to communicate with them? How to understand a man and how to please him? And what needs to be done so that a man appreciates and respects a woman?

So, how to understand a man - psychology:

  • Firstly, all men love attention, affection and care. They need to be admired by their feminine, even if their exploits are embellished. It is very important to meet your man with a smile, preferably at the same time hugging;
  • secondly, the representatives of the stronger sex like to fulfill understandable and feasible requests for their beloved women, which should be spoken out loud, and not wait for them to guess to do something.

For example, a man himself will not guess that flowers are important for a woman if the woman herself does not tell him about it, but this should be said without hysterics and in a calm voice. For example, it is useless to demand from a loved one to make repairs at home if he quietly hates it and does not know how. It is better to direct his energy to earning additional funds for repairs that will be done by professionals.

All women make a typical mistake, thinking that her chosen one will listen and just chat with her about problems, like her best friend. You should not expect from him that, having told about his problem, he will sympathize as well as a girlfriend. A man will not give out advice on how to fix the situation using specific recommendations, but he can talk heart to heart just like that if there is some kind of discussion.

Only by starting to respect yourself and your needs for women, you can get the fulfillment of your desires from the representatives of the stronger sex.

A woman who understands a man will allow him to be alone, lie on the couch, watch his favorite football or boxing. She realizes that her chosen one cannot devote all the time to her or work all the time.

Representatives of the stronger sex do not like being controlled and asked a lot of questions: "where was, where did you go, where did you spend your money, why did you say that." If such instructions and questions come continuously from women, then sooner or later they run away from such relationships.

How to understand a man's attitude

Women in relationships with the stronger sex should realize that they are arranged differently, so it is very difficult to understand a man and his attitude. They realize and feel women's actions far from the same as men. It's all about the characteristics of male psychology. For example, the day of acquaintance, the anniversary of the wedding, the representatives of the stronger sex are not considered significant dates. But forgetfulness in small things does not mean that they are indifferent to their beloved. The strong sex is driven by great achievements, and honoring traditions is not so important for them, so the fair sex should simply accept this fact, not be offended and remind their chosen ones of the upcoming anniversaries in advance.

You can’t make scandals, blame them for inattention, you just need to calmly explain that this is very important. Having received what you want, it is necessary to thank your beloved from the bottom of your heart, so he realizes how important it is for a woman to fulfill small requests and feel sincerely loved. Women's patience and love will eventually instill in her husband an understanding of the significance of these little things.

Hello!
I want to tell you my relationship history and ask if I have a reason for concern, or if I'm doing something wrong, and I wanted to hear your advice.
My man and I have known each other for 8 months, it just so happened that he didn’t ask if I wanted to be in a relationship with him, we somehow smoothly came to this together. And when I ask why, he always answers that from the first day of our acquaintance he knew that it was serious.
The fact is that I have a child, a little daughter, and they love each other very much, he has known her since six months and she grows up before his eyes, calls him dad, and his whole family accepted and loved us. It seems that everything the glory of the universe, we are fine, I’m incredibly lucky to meet such a person. He says that he loves me very much and of course I also love him crazy, and most importantly I feel his love. But when it comes to a wedding or living together, then I understand that I don’t understand a damn thing (pardon the expression). He set himself an exorbitant goal to buy a car for cash, and in this regard, he works seven days a week, and the wedding and living together are in the background for him, of course, I support him in every possible way in his goal, but as a couple I feel sorry that my daughter and I are on second place after the car. He says, “First I’ll make money for the car, and then for the wedding”, the car costs a little more than 1 million rubles, and I understand with a sober mind that in two years as he promises, he is unlikely to earn money for all this, yes and we don’t have separate housing. We both live in three-room apartments, but each with his relatives, only on very rare weekends I have his daughters, he explains this by the fact that while he works seven days a week, it makes no sense for us to live together, because we will only see each other at night, and all day long I will be alone with the child, I have the opposite opinion, I think that we will see each other at least at night and in the morning. And to this I hear silence, I don’t want to put pressure on him, but I’m afraid that he just deliberately delays this moment of living together. And I’m also afraid that after these two years I myself won’t want to get married or live together, because I’ll get used to this kind of relationship, and this will be delayed indefinitely, and I’m worried about the fact that during this period I will become pregnant with a second child, and I don’t want to get married on a flight, for me it’s such a panic fear, I’m very afraid of this ((
In general, something like this.
I really want to hear your advice!

How to understand if a man wants a further relationship. We lived together for a year, experienced both operations and the loss of loved ones and a lot of things. As a result, my man broke up with me. When I packed my things and left, he hated me. talk. And then he abruptly changed his attitude, we periodically meet to practice magic, but it’s clear that a man needs sex. He says that we will never live together again, but he checks my phone, asks who is calling me, and justifies himself to me. this can be explained, is family reunification possible with such behavior?

Hello! Please comment on my situation.
Dating a man for the fifth month. I got into him. I enjoy spending time with him. I feel a lot of passion from him, but there is no attention and he does not want to live together. I don't want to be a friend. I am 41 years old. He has been divorced for three years and lives alone constantly meeting women temporarily. He tells me he's getting used to it. Meets friends. We spend the weekend together. Then he seemed to sober up and "go to work." Answers calls. But the question is that many women are constantly seeking his attention. He is wealthy, handsome, holds a good position. Previously, he did not hide what could be wrong. Now he says that he sleeps only with me and refuses these women attention. How to check? How to move relationships? How much to wait? Tell me what steps to take to at least offer to live together. When we spend evenings and weekends together, we cook together, we walk, we go to visit. But every day he does not want to be with me. The reasons are funny: it’s not cleaned, I’m tired, I’ll sleep, I have to iron the clothes ... I always hear: I’m getting used to it, I’m a calf.

  • Hello, Natalia. It is not difficult to guess why a man after a divorce does not want a serious relationship and does not want to live together, he has his own experience. He already knows from the inside what cohabitation is like, and now his fantasy after the divorce does not draw anything good.
    It is possible that the reason for not wanting to live together lies in his personal comfort, since he is used to a certain routine, state of affairs, freedom. To let a woman into your home initially means changing your own habits, restricting freedom and restructuring your life. Not everyone is ready for this, even if it is only about moving his beloved to him. Living in different living spaces is emotionally more comfortable, and if the work is nervous, then there may simply not be enough energy to establish something new and give a woman her shelves for creams. Previously, it was very difficult to survive alone, people united in families, now the conditions have changed, and a man is quite capable of independently providing for his own existence. Be patient. Men are more attached in relationships than women, so having already experienced the collapse of a relationship once, it takes a lot of courage and restored internal resources to be able to try again. Therefore, you can not put pressure on the chosen one, demand to devote all your free time to yourself. He should always feel comfortable and, if necessary, take care of personal matters at any time. You can't be overly curious. A man has the right to secrets, so you can not demand what he does not want to tell. Of course, you can not look through his email, mobile phone, endlessly jealous. It is recommended to praise and release compliments. No need to look for a special reason for praise. You just have to say something nice, but sincere.
    It is necessary to show a man that in bed he gives real pleasure, so you should give up sex less, be the initiator of it. It is very important to take care of a man, and if you become irreplaceable for him, then he himself will not want to let you go.

Hello! My problem is that I'm 21 and I haven't dated anyone in my entire life. The fact is that I am very afraid of disappointment. I never had a second date, and I realized a simple thing. I'm too afraid of relationships, and I have too many moral principles. Every time a man wants to hug me, I turn into a statue. When I try to kiss, I close my lips with my fingers and push them away, explaining that a decent girl should not be kissed on a first date. I do not know what to do.

Hello, I have such a difficult situation, I have a relationship with a person for three years, they met, now they have begun to live, but at the moment he has left to work in an arc city, but he is coming, and now he tells me that he will work there for three months. Before that, we had a fight with him. I caught him on a dating site, he kind of explained to me that this is a friend, and his name is nonsense. I stopped calling him, but he called himself - like you don’t call me; I don't know what to do, I'm already tired.

Hello. I met a man on a dating site, we met once, talked, after which he left, and a week after our meeting we communicate only in correspondence, he does not call, does not make appointments. (The purpose of his registration on the site is to find a girl to create a family) I don’t write to him first, the initiative always comes from him. But it bothers me that he doesn't want to see me again. At the same time, he writes how good, beautiful, etc., etc. I am. Tell me, please, how to understand his attitude towards me?

Good afternoon, tell me please, I have a very strange situation. 2 months ago, I started dating a young man, we have known each other for a long time, but he took the initiative just now. From the very beginning, we agreed to tell each other the truth, since both he and I have luggage behind us (divorce, children). He works a lot, immediately warned me about it, I agreed and accepted the situation. The whole problem is that despite all that he says that I am his girlfriend, that he wants to build a relationship with me, that he is interested and comfortable in every sense, but with all this, he hardly finds time for meetings, for calls, we communicate a lot through instant messengers, and communication in instant messengers is generally idyll, but as soon as the weekend or on weekdays come, he simply ignores me, and then, as if nothing had happened, begins to communicate with me. I know for sure that he is divorced and because of the large amount of work he simply has no time to go to the left. I asked him many times, when he comes late from work, to write an SMS that everything is in order, he either writes or not. I get the impression that I am participating in some kind of experiment from endless innuendo. Although he says, well, what are you worried about, everything will be fine. Help me figure out whether this is really some kind of game, or whether this is a feature of behavior. I no longer know what to think, he is very nice to me, but it is very difficult to be in a misunderstanding. Help me figure it out, I need to end this relationship or somehow bring it to revelation and understand that this is a feature of behavior, I got confused and go around in circles, not finding answers to my questions.

  • Hello Lana. You are in a relationship for a fairly short period of time and your idea of ​​a relationship does not coincide with the idea of ​​a young man, so there is some misunderstanding for you of what is happening. If a man says that everything is fine, you need to listen to his words.
    “I asked him many times, when he comes late from work, to write an SMS that everything is in order, he either writes or not.” - It's more like your desire to keep everything under control, men don't like that.
    “Help me figure it out, we need to stop this relationship or somehow bring him to revelation” - If a man is dear to you, then try to understand him and accept him as he is. If you lead to a frank conversation and make far-fetched claims, a man may doubt the expediency of continuing the relationship.

    • Good afternoon,
      I took note of everything you wrote, but the problem is that after the divorce, I became insecure and mentally unbalanced. I always feel like my boyfriend is cheating on me. It seems to me that I am engaged in self-deception, I fantasize a lot (you are right that too little time has passed). My husband and I had a very difficult divorce, and after it so much surfaced that it is now very difficult to believe. I am very afraid of deception on the part of my young man, because this is the first man in 5 years that I liked and with whom I wanted more. It’s like I’m in a vicious circle, I’m walking around and I can’t find answers to my questions, because I understand that if I push, then nothing good will come of it. It remains only to wait and be patient, there is no other way out.

Hello, tell me please, I have such a situation, I have been living with my husband for almost 8 years, I have a son 5 years old, he is 10 years older than me, before we met he spent 8 years in prison, almost immediately after we met we began to live, before we met personally about talked on the phone for six months. There was practically no candy-bouquet period, when they began to live, I found out that he was talking with another girl, endless correspondence and calls, did not explain his behavior in any way, after about a year of cohabitation, I became pregnant and he promised that nothing like this would happen again. The first year was all right, he always flew home, helped with the child, after some time we got a separate home, he started drinking and periodically left with a friend, when I tried to keep him, he used force. Once he even beat me in the entrance, explaining that I got him, that I needed something all the time, that I was obsessed with money, although it was about elementary things, after that similar situations happened many more times, but I think I myself sometimes forced him to take such measures. so that she tried to find out the relationship, insulted. After his parties, the numbers of girls appeared on the phone, I went to extreme measures to attract attention, I was looking for relationships on the side, there was nothing serious and long-lasting, but he also found out about it, after repeated conversations, I realized that I could lose him. There were a lot of moments on his part when he left and walked in the company of girls who, as it turned out later, were aware of our relationship and assured him that he needed to part with me. He, like me, has a problem with alcohol, in the evenings he can drink beer, then something stronger at dinner, most often I support him. The last time we were visiting, after which the drunk returned home, I fell asleep, he returned to his friends and took our car, in the morning I woke up, just at that time he went home in a very drunk state and was about to leave again, I took the keys to drive away the car started under the windows to the parking lot, he jumped out and took the keys, breaking my arm. The next day, he continued to drink in the company of girls, one of them told me on the phone that my husband was a freak, as I understood, he molested her in every possible way, but did not receive a positive reaction. The problem is that, for two or three months, he behaves perfectly, caringly, then a bzik happens, usually against the background of alcohol, he behaves aggressively, talking and sorting out relationships annoy him, he rarely asks for forgiveness, almost never. Now my arm is broken, I didn’t hear a word of apology, instead insults and reproaches. Seeing my tears, he becomes even more irritated and says something offensive. I don’t understand how to be in this situation, sometimes I think how good and caring he is, he cooks tasty, attentive, makes gifts, gentle, relatives also see and notice this, then something like a relapse happens and he is like like it was changed. He can not talk and ignore for a week, be so cold that it seems that I have never met a worse relationship. When asked if he loves me, he avoids answering. And when everything is good, he talks about it all the time. It seems to me that past mistakes and alleged betrayals on his and my part are to blame, or rather, that there is no such awe and respect. How to return a good attitude and is there any point? Tell me how to be? I am very sorry for my son and at the same time I am very emotionally dependent on my husband.

  • Hello, Elena. “How to return a good attitude and is there any point?” - Do not try to remake your husband and do not change his usual way of life. It's useless. Accept it as it is: with its advantages and disadvantages. And whether this makes sense is up to you.

Hello, we met a young man 2 weeks ago. At first it was just communication, during the week he offered to see each other and spend time together, and when we spent the evening together at his house, we drank and he began to pester, the evening ended and I went home. After that, I decided that it was not worth talking anymore, a few days later he wrote again and offered to see each other, and in our further communication there were no more hints of intimacy on his part. And I had a question, what exactly does he want from communicating with me, or he seeks intimacy, or he realized his mistake and decided to build some kind of relationship. How can you find out without asking the question directly, because if he wants a relationship, I think that this question can somehow push him away.

  • Consider the first encroachment on intimacy on his part as the first test of you "for lice" which (I hope) you passed successfully. He didn't realize his mistake. It is you who began to look much more worthy (for example, perhaps as his future wife, who will NOT immediately throw herself into bed with a new, better lover).

Hello, help me to understand the person. We have known each other for six years, we have two children. When quarrels, he is offended, leaves for his mother. He may not answer calls, turn off the phone for several days, while doing his own thing. Once I myself suggested that we leave him, he began to dissuade me, talking about children, about the family, that he would no longer behave like that. Time passed, the relationship went back to normal, and then the same thing began ... I got sick and felt bad, he didn’t care what was happening to me. He packed his things and left, saying that he would not observe my dissatisfaction with him. Although it was not dissatisfaction, but simply poor health. I just realized that a person doesn’t care what happens to me, again began to delve into myself and look for the reason, made a concession and decided to correct the situation, to talk. But he ignores me, turns off the phone and resets again. And when he answered the calls, he said that he would not find out anything. I called his mother to find out why his phone was turned off, she answered me that he did not want to talk and live with me the same. Here's how to be, how to understand it??? And I don’t want to lose him and I can’t understand what he needs and how to get through.

Good afternoon Help to understand, please! I don't even know who else to turn to with this question.
At the moment I communicate with a young man for about a year. Conditionally, let's call him O. It is worth noting that when I just started communicating with O., for the first 2-3 months, I simultaneously left the old relationship and spent some time with the former. O. was not aware of this, but suspected, as it turned out now. We just walked, went to the cinema, to exhibitions, to bars. They didn't even kiss. I liked O. both as a man and as a person, but I did not assume that we would have something, but I did not show any initiative. They did not meet often, the nature of communication was friendly, rather.
Approximately 8 months from that time, we can say we meet. There were no “official” statements on this subject. We began to communicate and meet more often. O. is rather secretive, introverted, and it is difficult to understand his intentions. Everything was fine, we spent time together, we found common interests and topics, and compatibility of temperaments. Gradually I fell in love.
But I did not leave the thought of how he sees our relationship. It seemed to me that he "keeps his distance." So I called him in for a conversation to find out what was between us (about six months after the start of a close relationship). I confessed my feelings. And he said, “I never fell in love with anyone.” I wanted to stop everything, but on reflection, I decided to continue and see what would come of it. O. did not object. However, I began to notice that in our communication there were more tenderness and signs of jealousy. Although O. tries not to show it. I didn't focus too much on it. For all the time of our communication, there was not a single quarrel or complaint.
Some time passed, and he began to show less and less initiative. Rarely called for a walk, etc. The distance between us has increased. But I did not attach much importance to this, because. I am a supporter of the fact that everyone should have “personal space”. I go in for sports, attend social events, communicate with friends and with other men, in general, I have a life apart from relations with O. Sometimes I could change plans (of course, after notifying him in advance) if I was not going to do something serious or interesting together. Well, I thought that he had a “blockage at work” or something like that.
Suddenly, O. stopped calling and writing altogether, and answered my calls and messages coldly and in monosyllables. After a week of such “communication”, she asked him for a meeting, he agreed. At the meeting, he said that he did not see the point in further communication, because. “I'm acting weird” and he doesn't trust me; pointed out that at the beginning of our relationship I met with someone else, and he is aware of this. And not so long ago I received strange calls and SMS (usual friendly calls and jokes). Allegedly, I have other men besides him. I confirmed that his suspicions about the beginning of a relationship were justified, but all the others have no basis, except for his uncertainty. His reasoning was that he could no longer trust me, even if his suspicions were unfounded, and therefore saw no point in continuing to meet. However, he does not want to completely break off contacts, and does not want to “burn bridges”. I decided to be, as it will be, turned around and left, wishing good luck to the person.
After another week of silence and reflection, I realized that I did not want everything to end like this. This person is dear to me and I want to be with him.
I asked for another meeting. O. did not refuse. We met, I calmly expressed my opinion and admitted that I was guilty (for starting a relationship) and asked to give me another chance. He listened silently. Regarding my request for a chance, he asked - "What will change?". I answered honestly that I don't know. At the end he said, "I'll think about it."
It doesn't repel you at all, but it doesn't let you get any closer either. How to understand what he achieves such behavior? I don't even know how to react. I try not to impose myself, I don’t write, I don’t call often. I'm just trying to explain the situation to him. Or rather, your view of her. Yes, I was wrong when I started dating him, ending my relationship with another young man. But this is my only fault. O. imputes to me, almost all mortal sins. Again, maybe what he says about the reasons for the breakup is just a cover.
I am a realist and I understand that if you drive away thoughts about him for the right time, then everything will pass. However, I believe that these relationships are worth fighting for. I want to keep what we have and make the relationship better.
I do not want to believe that everything will end. It seems to me that everything is possible to change until you give up.
I would really appreciate it if you could shed some light on the situation.
Best regards, Xenia

  • Hello Xenia. You really subtly noticed the introversion of your man. The character of such a person is always calm, he is a balanced and reasonable nature. Such a man does not make hasty, categorical decisions and will think through all the options, choosing the most effective one. Often such balance borders on indecision and slowness. He is more comfortable spending time with inner thoughts and anxieties alone.
    Introverts can quite well live long enough without communicating with anyone, which is why your young man was in no hurry with SMS and calls.
    Introverts prefer to observe any social processes from the outside, but not to take part in them. Therefore, your chosen one compares everything, watches you, studies you, and you perceive him as a lack of initiative. If you are ready to actively interact with him and always take the initiative, then act, and if you want a bright relationship, then change the chosen one.

Hello, I am 34 years old, he is 56 years old, we have been dating for 20 years. Many times she tried to leave and arrange her personal life, but returned to him. I cheated on him a lot and he knows he was married twice, has children, divorced for 6 years. We do not live together, although he is alone in the apartment, the children live separately. I really want to start a family, give birth to a child, but he does not need it. What do i do? Why can't I leave and keep coming back? How to figure it out? I am outwardly pretty, slim, I look very young. So why is there no personal life? Help, please!

Hello, I have a problem. We met at a party, for the first 2 weeks he sought my attention: he asked for a phone number, wanted to come (several times), but I often refused him. After a while we met, at first I did not show any sympathy for him. He began to come more often, everything was fine, it seemed that he was not indifferent to me. This went on for 1 month. The last meeting we had was on his initiative with the words “I miss you, I want to see you”, he came, we had a good evening. Then he disappeared for 3 weeks: he didn’t write, didn’t call, didn’t come ... I can’t understand his behavior! What do I need to do so that it appears, or do nothing at all, but just wait?

  • Hello Anna. To begin with, ask if something happened to your new friend, but just waiting means showing indifference towards him.

We have been together for 5.6 years and everything was fine, but a year and a half ago my husband's best friend died. They were inseparable, neither at work nor at home. My husband has depression. I took care of all the housework, financial support. He began to come home late more often, constantly without mood. I stopped taking care of myself, went around in the same clothes (it was very cold at work and I had to dress according to climatic conditions). In the evenings, from not knowing where my husband is, why he doesn’t pick up the phone or even hangs up calls, he disappears for three days, I started drinking beer to fall asleep and he started saying that I was an alcoholic. Then everything. New Year's holidays, he went somewhere, and soon left altogether. I rented an apartment and slowly moved my things. It was unbearably painful, I asked him to pick up all the things at once, but he did not, and I was able to pick up the keys to the apartment two months after he left. I wrote to him, called, asked him to come back, to talk, but he did not make contact. About three weeks ago, a partner overturned her husband for a certain amount of money and the husband was left without a job and with debts, moved to his parents. And now he goes to my place every evening, asks for something to eat and watches a movie. At the same time, we do not communicate, so in a few phrases. To the question: “why does he go?”, he answers: “I see what has changed in you.” Yesterday I told him not to come that I was sleeping, so he came this morning and said: “I can’t let you go, but I can’t with you either.” Please tell me what this means, how to do the right thing, I do not want and cannot lose this person. Thank you very much.

  • Hello Irina. Your husband at this stage himself suffers and torments you. As soon as everything is fine with him, he will stop coming to you, because he will not need your help. Now it is convenient for him to behave like this. So draw your own conclusions.

Hello!
After reading the article, I am once again convinced that it is very difficult to understand not this or that act, but the true attitude of a man in his head.
Please help me figure out my situation. Perhaps it's easier than I think. Familiar with a young man 1.5 months. The first 1.5 weeks, so to speak, he conquered me. It did not consist in giving flowers, going to theaters, etc., but he did not disappear, he called often, he was interested in me in everything. He made it clear to me in every possible way that he was alone and that there were no more relationships and acquaintances. Now the situation is as follows: I have been calling for the past 2 weeks only. I call him to the cinema, then we cook dinner together, then we just take a walk, but I am the initiator. But he doesn't refuse. As for more intimate meetings, they took place on his territory and 4 times. When meeting and parting, then he can kiss, then not. I'm the only one showing affection. Although, in his monologues, he reasoned that he really wants to be interested in him, to show concern. I gently asked him if he was comfortable with me. He replied: "Yes." And when asked why he didn’t call, he replied that everyone had piled on work, he was tired. My opinion is that if a person is interesting, then I want more communication and meetings. There are 2 options in my head: 1 - he only wants to reduce the relationship to purely friendly, friendly, 2 - he cannot say no to my face, but leads me to move away myself.
Is it worth it in this situation to give a break (take silence on your part) or ask him direct questions yourself? But such a pressure of questions can also scare away. Thank you in advance!

  • Hello Anastasia. In a relationship, everything should be mutual, and not so unambiguously “I’ve only been calling for the last 2 weeks”.
    “Ask him direct questions yourself? But such a pressure of questions can scare away ”- It’s better to ask right away, not necessarily directly, you can just ask what, in his opinion, should be the ideal relationship between a man and a woman, or what qualities his chosen one should have, what family model is ideal in his understanding, Who should be in charge in a relationship? Be sure to analyze and listen carefully. It is better to immediately figure out for yourself: whether such a chosen one is suitable for you personally or not. Do the views on life coincide, or is it better to just remain good friends and not build illusions.
    “Is it worth it in this situation to give a break (to take silence on my part)” - You can do this, such as answering the same, they say, tired, sick, didn’t have the strength to call and in this way you will find out if your friend is worried about you or not. After that, you will make a conclusion whether such a relationship is necessary or not.

We have been together for 9.5 years. There are no children, because believed that with our way of life, we are not yet ready to take on such a responsibility. Our relationship is made up of 1. respect, 2. sincerity, 3. trust and 4. /optional/ love. At the same time, they understood that love is only a chemical reaction that lasts 3-4 years, depending on the hormonal background. We never quarrel, there are no tantrums. We always supported each other, in the strangest ideas, when no one believed. We supported each other in the most terrible moments of life: it seemed that the world was collapsing, but it didn’t matter - everything was fine at home. We listen to each other, praise, thank, express our desires and dissatisfaction. We know that both are to blame in any situation, so we always started discussing the problem and solving it.
2 years ago we moved to a small town because of his career. I have a job I hate / there is simply no other in this village / and He. Previously, there was an active social life, successful work, interesting friends. We left and I didn't regret a single day. And I still don't regret it.
But 2 days ago he said that "there is a man." This girl said that she has feelings for him and would like to meet, but for some reason he does not reciprocate. Then he said about me - and the girl wrote "do not write to me anymore" and sent him to the ban. “Something broke in me. I've never felt like this." It turns out that for 2 years he corresponded with her, shared his thoughts with her - and not with me. I noticed this, but I thought that some detachment due to work. And with our meager social life, there’s not even anything to talk about - we know everything about each other. In those moments, I felt that I needed to show respect for his desire not to talk to me. She called him on dates, to the cinema, to the skating rink ... But he refused. Did you have to be persistent?
To the question “Do you want to continue a relationship with her?” he replied "I don't know".
I want to keep our relationship. But he cannot understand himself. How can he be helped? How can I help him understand his psychology? How to convince to save the marriage, to improve it? Help is needed.

  • Hello Katherine. If you want to save a relationship, then try to understand male psychology. It's normal that your man liked someone else besides you. The men are polygamous. Take what happened easier and don't idealize your relationship. It so happened that you could not replace the whole world for him, and he shared his thoughts not with you. It is not worth being persistent in anything and pestering with questions with your experiences. It's pressure on him. No matter how unpleasant it is, but ideally, to pretend that nothing like this happened, and just a friend appeared for communication. And that's it. He does not need help, help yourself to endure and wait correctly for this entire period.
    “At the same time, they understood that love is only a chemical reaction that lasts 3-4 years, depending on the hormonal background” - Do not cultivate this idea in the family. Everything should depend only on you and on your ability to maintain passion in a relationship. Otherwise every 4 years the husband will have a new love.
    We recommend to read:


How often do you ask yourself the question “How to understand a man, his actions and actions?” and find the correct answer?

Can you say that you are completely satisfied with how much you understand your man? Unfortunately, sometimes women give up trying to learn more about the psychology of a man in love, referring to the fact that it is " allegedly impossible ". Especially if there is a place for mutual insults and disappointments in the relationship.
The relationship between a man and a woman has its own strategies and mechanisms of understanding.
And we need to ask ourselves the question: do we really understand them? Are we doing the right thing to make these mechanisms work?

If you understand the mindset of a man, it will become much easier for you to build relationships with them. There are truths that give the key to understanding the psychology of men in love. Successful relationships are built only when wise women do not ignore these axioms laid down by nature.

When you finish reading this article, you will have no questions left about how to understand a man. Men are "genetically trained" to act systematically, why shouldn't women try? Naturally, not to the detriment of yourself, your nature and femininity.

If my beliefs are not enough for you to believe in the effectiveness of my advice, use the experience of one of my students (I am very grateful to Marina for these kind words):

Before revealing these important truths on how to understand a man, I will start with one example. Not quite typical for a man, but understandable for a woman.

If I wanted to make a delicious apple pie, I would first find an appropriate specialist on the Internet and read his recipe. Trusting expert experience, I would not spend too much time and effort. And the cake came out exactly the way I wanted. This is because I initially recognized this "mechanism" - the recipe, and then it went by itself.

Just imagine! In fact, everything that surrounds us can really be the way we WANT to see it in our lives. And it's simple. It is enough to know the "mechanism". I want to give you this knowledge. Therefore, let's take a closer look at the recipe for how to understand a man. Do you want misunderstandings to go out of your relationship? Then let's go!

5 facts about the inner world of a man that help to understand him better.

Of course, to figure out how to understand a man is by no means, not to cook a biscuit. And here you can’t do without a good cupcake, and a couple of broken eggs. Therefore, I present to you 5 facts about male behavior that will help you figure out the psychology of men in relationships with women:

1. A woman has a huge influence on a man.

It is generally accepted that the power in a relationship belongs to the husband. This is a myth born of understanding the role of men in the family. A man feeds his family, he is a breadwinner. It is commonly believed:
respectively, the power in the family, also on his shoulders. Competitiveness is an innate male quality, he is ready to accept the challenges of other men, he is ready to conquer mountains (to accept challengesthis world). This is an important partCOURAGE».

But this " courage» most vulnerable in a relationship with a woman (with you). A man is not born with the ability to find an approach to women. And it is much easier for most of us to demand a raise from our boss, to plan and conduct business negotiations that are of priority value in our work. It is in the genes of men to face great risks and capitalize on them.

But when it comes to relationships with a woman, a man's fears of being insolvent can take over him, and he will not cope. Most men do not need to be directly assisted in earning their livelihood. But a man is not able to motivate himself as effectively as he can do "competent Woman ". Do you want your husband to earn more, make you happier? Do you want him to hug you more often, speak and show how much you are dear to him? Then motivate your husband and every day spent next to such a man will be a real joy for you.

I'm not talking about daily sessions of flattery for your husband. I'm talking about creating atmosphere in your relationship.

A man wants to feel always “on horseback”. He wants a person close to him - his beloved woman - to show her daily confidence in his strength and courage.

Therefore, motivate your man and he will do everything for you and more.

2. Men like women who take the lead.

I often heard that it is an exclusively male task - to make the notorious "first step". This has absolutely nothing to do with reality.

For us, almost always, a relationship with a woman is a strict plan. Starting with dating, and ending with household and family issues. I have already pointed out to you that it is much easier for us to enter into a competition with another man, because the fear of losing is not so great.

For us, initially, all women are a fortress to which you need to find your own approach. First of all, you need to interest a woman in yourself. We are practitioners - we need to create a plan and implement it. In our understanding,
first step”- these are the actions that we direct to arouse interest in a woman.

For example, if a man sets himself the goal of getting a job, then the first thing he will do is try
interestpotential employer in yourself. The same thing happens in relationships with women. If a man decides to get attention, he directs his actions to arouse interest in himself. But, be sure that in the case of meeting a woman, men are much more likely to succumb to the fear of risking their "courage", hear" No" in reply.

So think about it. If you let a man know you're interested in him (for example, you can smile, or just say "
Hello”), then you remove this huge burden of choice from his shoulders -“risk your courage or not ". Believe me, men in absentia "in loveinto the woman who shows interest in him. And therefore, if you happen to run into somewhere with a man who, as you think, suits you, smile.
Do you have a big - use it!

3. If a woman allows her to act in any way - a man will always take advantage of this.

It's embarrassing, I understand. But you are here to find out the truth and get an answer to the question - how to understand the psychology of men's behavior. It is sad to admit, but it is a fact - they take advantage of those women who allow them to.

If you see that relations with a man are developing in the key
He's with me until he finds someone better. ”, then do not hesitate - draw a line. And tell him about it. Most men will respond to this adequately. This is how you show self-respect.

Men can't always distinguish relationships
We are good together now » from « We build relationships for the purpose of creating a family” . If you see that a man does not consider relationships in the long term, tell him about it and put an end to it. Because he won't.

4. Men are innately jealous. If a woman provokes his jealousy in order to get closer, this will have the opposite effect.

First of all, I want to remind you again that competitiveness is inherent in male nature. The real torture for a man is even to think that someone can take better care of his soulmate than himself.

Therefore, to arouse jealous feelings in a man in order to regain his intimacy is one of the worst methods. And, most likely, it will cause the opposite effect. A man with such a woman. Instead of experiencing this torture.

5. The way to a man's heart is through his ego. Men marry women who believe in them unconditionally.

I will give one widely known example. One man was on fire with a seemingly crazy idea. The idea was to create a self-propelled vehicle (called the internal combustion engine). And, to that end, he spent many years in the garage, working all his time on this idea, naturally he did not have time to provide for his family well. But his wife, beingcompetent”, believed, from day to day, in the strength of her husband, and instilled in him this confidence. But it must be taken into account that her husband, and even herself, were teased by neighbors, perhaps even friends, people close to them.

And so it went on for several long years. Subsequently, she was rewarded for her patience and wisdom. The day when she, along with her husband, left that same garage, on a self-propelled vehicle, the whole world still remembers as the day the automotive industry was born. This married couple was Henry Ford and Clara Bryant.

Support your man, only you can make him the best man on earth. Be faithful to your husband, be his friend, and likewise you will be rewarded for it.

What is important in understanding men

So, I want to be clear. Be sure - your man is fully capable of coping with his direct male duties. In fact, he does not need practical advice on, for example, how to make money, or how to manage his time. Also, he does not need to be reminded of what obligations he has assumed regarding you and the family as a whole.

A worthy man will only be with a woman who is on his side. We don't need to be taught anything, we don't need a second mother. Your husband will become successful and wealthy thanks to your sincere fidelity, care and faith in him.

Remember: You can be there for him. I have written about this many times in other articles. A man gets life experience and skills with skills on his own. It won't be necessary"
play jealousy with a man, or use some unethical, dishonest methods to bring him closer to you. Need to be for him "refugeto give him confidence in himself.

And yet - trust your chosen one. You do not tell the taxi driver how best to take you to your destination, do you? What pedals and when to press? Where to turn? That's right - you just give him money, that is, "
motivate him, and he will do an excellent job with the task assigned to him.

Don't forget these truths. And you will see that in a relationship there may not be problems with understanding.

Thank you for your attention, I really appreciate it! I long to bring lightness and comfort into your life. You deserve to be happy every day. Your opinion and feedback is invaluable to me. Especially if the question concerns the psychology of men in love.

I look forward to your comments.

The most interesting articles by Yaroslav Samoilov:

In order to avoid many quarrels and misunderstandings between a man and a woman, they need to learn to find a common language with each other. This article will reveal to women some secrets of male psychology that will help them better understand men.

Features of male psychology

Psychological science has proven that there are still differences between the feelings, thoughts and behavior of men and women. Often, the female view of the actions and actions of men turns out to be wrong. How to understand male psychology? What features of the stronger sex should be taken into account?

  • You need to understand that men do not have "male psychology", in the sense in which women understand it. They are much less concerned about relationships between people, feelings, emotions. We can say that women are more likely to feel, and men to act.
  • They don't understand subtle hints. By facial expressions, changes in posture, intonation, men cannot understand what feelings the other person is experiencing. Therefore, if a woman shows resentment, he simply may not notice it. Not out of malice, of course. In order to achieve something from a man, you need to show your feelings, emotions and desires directly.
  • By nature, the representatives of the stronger sex are more silent. They usually speak more slowly than women. Therefore, if you chirp in their ear at the usual pace for women, most of the information will simply not be heard. For a man, what he sees is much more important than what he hears.
  • A woman is always more attentive to details. The man assesses the situation as a whole. He cannot determine what are the differences in the cut of the two dresses, for him only the color and silhouette are different, he will not understand that the make-up has changed. For a man, the overall impression is important, and not what details it consists of.
  • The spirit of rivalry always sits in the representatives of the stronger sex. They can compete only with men. Therefore, men's gatherings are so important for them. Thanks to this, psychological comfort and balance are achieved. Communication only with women cannot give them this.

In fact, men are not so difficult to understand. They have everything "written on the face." You need to take a closer look at how he behaves, how he looks, how he communicates with a woman, and trust your feelings.

Man's love

When in love, men and women think and behave differently. Therefore, it is difficult for many women to understand the feelings and behavior of the strong half of humanity.

It must be remembered that initially a man still chooses a girl who will meet his personal standards of female beauty. And only then, after communication, will pay attention to her inner world and what kind of mistress she is.

After meeting a woman, the stage of falling in love follows. And only after that there is love. At this stage, the psychology of men is radically different from their way of thinking during dating. Now the main thing to understand is whether a woman is suitable for the role of wife and mother.

The thing is that if a woman is the owner of a chic appearance and a rich inner world, but at the same time in her kitchen there is a constant mountain of unwashed dishes, greasy pans and burnt food leftovers, then a man is unlikely to have a desire to build a serious, long-term relationship.

But immersing yourself completely in the economy, while forgetting about your appearance, is also not worth it. Male psychology in love lies precisely in finding a compromise between your appearance, inner world and thriftiness. If this compromise is found, then the marriage will not be long in coming.

Signs of male love

Male psychology in relationships, as well as in life in general, is always calmer than female psychology. The lesser emotionality of men is often interpreted as a lack of feelings.

Signs by which you can determine a man's love:

  • If instead of the pronoun "I", a man increasingly uses the pronoun "we", this clearly indicates his feelings. Subconsciously, he already looks at the woman as a whole with himself.
  • Fishing trips and gatherings with friends go by the wayside. He wants to spend as much time as possible with the woman he loves. Work is the only exception. She will always remain in the first place for most men.
  • A small but important sign of male love is when a man allows a woman to use his favorite "toys". For example, a car, an expensive computer, a cell phone or a watch.
  • By the way, any more or less significant quarrel also demonstrates male feelings. A man will quarrel with a woman only if he plans to continue to be with her.
  • If a man has moved from talking about a joint future to some actions, such as fixing a faucet or buying a kettle, this means that he is already ready to build the future.
  • Consent to a joint life is one of the surest signs of true male love. Joint cleaning of the apartment or cooking dinner are very important actions for a man.

Literature on male psychology

You can learn better the inner world of your chosen one by reading books about male psychology. One of them is very useful and informative in this regard. Such is: Tamara Paliy's publication "Male psychology for intellectual women". Book release year: 2011.

The information contained in it will benefit all women who have their own character and have tough foundations.

From the book you can learn:

  • Why, when a man loses interest in a woman, she becomes powerless.
  • How to interest a man by applying his own approach.
  • How, using the tactics of safe, covert hypnosis, to get the location of a man and make him think about himself.
  • How to get rid of male dominance in the family.
  • How to use the dark side of your personality to your advantage.
  • How, without touching the body of a man, excite him.
  • How to manage a man so that he likes it, and he was delighted with it.

Not everything is so simple in the world of men. They live with us, love us, but play by their own rules. And we girls need to know these rules in order to understand what game to play and how to win. The more competently you show yourself in a relationship with your lover, the more points you will earn in the eyes of the chosen one as his girlfriend, wife and mother of future children.

Not one step back, or Rule One

All people make mistakes, but men never. The statistics of the "Hunting School" (a sample of five thousand men) happily informs us that the probability of a man admitting his mistake tends to zero. This is especially true if the woman turned out to be right. A man, of course, can apologize, but with what pleasure he will blame everything on circumstances. He will say that he was forced: "I did not want to, but it happened." The most amazing thing is that, most likely, he is telling the truth, and the most difficult thing is to look at this truth through male eyes. I warn you right away, the ones who will be guilty in his story will be: colleagues, bosses, the situation, but not himself.

The only intention that he pursues at this moment is a desperate desire to remain a good guy for you. After all, it is when a man has not lived up to your expectations that he is most afraid of being bad. He himself perfectly understands that he is to blame. When a woman constantly points out to a man his mistakes and recalls old sins, then sooner or later he will begin to meet your worst expectations.

As soon as a man is wrong and you are right, you inevitably face a choice: be right and continue to defend your point of view, or be happy and look at the situation through the eyes of a man. And you will choose the second if you value your relationship. As long as you accept his truth, as long as you look at him with faith and admiration in your eyes, he will strive to match his reflection in the eyes of the woman he loves.

One step forward, two steps back, or Rule Two

Man at acquaintance not looking for a serious relationship. He is quite enough "regular frivolous". Remember how often it sounds: “I want to get married!”, But you are unlikely to hear about the fact that “I want to get married.”

Any attempt to write the young man's name on the marriage certificate is perceived by him as an aggressive encroachment on his freedom. And a man is very jealous of his personal space. Only after some time, more and more deeply realizing how good he is with this girl, the man begins to let her into his personal space.

But you need to "master" the male territory as if you were a cat, slowly and carefully moving forward on soft paws. As soon as you show your claws or declare that you have the right to his space, the man will immediately take a step back or to the side, reminding you that you are only a guest in his house, even a welcome one.

If you want to get out married for the chosen one - act! Siege, ambush and caution - these are your trump cards on the way to female happiness. This fortress cannot be taken by storm.

Dust in the eyes, or the third rule

All men brag, but each does it in his own way: someone with a beautiful wife, someone with a new car, and someone with the number of books they read.

When a woman admires a man, he feels special. And at this moment a miracle happens: a simple guy suddenly grows wings behind his back. Now he is Superman and ready to kill the villain, in the sense of coping with any problem.

Therefore, admiration is what every representative of the strong half of humanity subconsciously expects and dreams of. Thirst and need for admiration is manifested in rivalry with friends, in an effort to throw dust in the eyes of women. He boasts himself and subconsciously waits for approval from the outside. As in childhood. After all, if he is "hoo" what a wonderful - it must be noticed.

When you hear any revelation from a man, don't stop him, don't try to dispel his illusion of omnipotence. Fantasy, even if it is far from reality, can become reality if you allow yourself to believe in it.

Brevity is the sister of talent, or the Fourth Rule

Communication plays a different role in the life of a man and a woman. For girls, the process of communication is a pleasure in itself. For guys, it's just a way to get information. And everything they hear, they perceive as it is. Ornately constructed phrases and indirect requests do not find a response in the male soul. The simpler the sentence is constructed, the more likely it is that you will be understood correctly.

A girl who is in a relationship with a young man sincerely believes that her beloved should read her thoughts or at least guess about her desires. But the more the request is veiled, the more hints, the more difficult it is for a man to guess what they want from him. In this mutual misunderstanding lies the cause of female disappointment. And the man has a counter reaction - irritation. He feels that they are dissatisfied with him, but he cannot understand what he is doing wrong and why cannot he simply say what is required of him?

It just so happened that a man is a logical and handsome creature, but he is used to speaking briefly and clearly, getting specific answers to his questions and simply does not know how to do it differently. By explaining your needs as clearly as possible, you make it easier for him and get what you need: a new iPhone, going to the movies or affectionate SMS at night.

"Iron Mask", or Rule Five

In the harsh world of men, it is not customary to show emotions. A real hero is always in a mask: no one should see his face. The ability to "keep up the mark" and hide experiences is a hallmark of the strongest half of humanity. A man who has trouble at work is the most withdrawn, laconic and gloomy creature in the world. All he wants when he has a difficult period in his life is for the household, along with the woman he loves, to leave him alone.

At this moment, various bad thoughts enter the woman’s head, and she begins to think about them. Having gone through the worst options for the development of relations, the girl is offended and withdraws into herself, and then the young man has one more headache. Or he begins to interrogate his beloved with predilection about what plunged him into world sorrow. A man, in order to cope with something - to survive betrayal, resentment or solve a difficult task - needs to digest it in himself.

And we have to be patient. After all, after a man solves his problems in his head, we will receive a well-deserved reward: he will return in a wonderful mood and ready to communicate.

Herd instinct, or the sixth rule

The herd instinct is not a relic of the past, it still drives modern representatives of the strongest half of humanity and is manifested in the male desire to unite in companies. There are three signs by which men unite in groups.

The first is by age. People of the same age have something to remember, because their childhood passed at the same time and the culture of this period will always be close to them.

The second is interest. The direction of male interests can lie in any area.

The third is the presence of a common enemy. These groups have the highest levels of adrenaline and testosterone and the most intolerant attitude towards life, most often multiplied by a heightened sense of justice.

In each men's group there are topics in which our boys show the most reverent interest. Sex, sports and / or politics - that's what occupies the hot men's minds when we are not around.

If you are not happy that a young person spends too much time in the company, you can either enter his environment and become part of the group, or take frequent absences with friends as a personal space and calmly go about your business. You can enter the immediate environment of your loved one by accepting the following settings:

  • First, your man has great company.
  • Second, you like the place where they gather.
  • Third - we are talking about the desire to meet and chat with his friends. If we get a refusal, we return to point three in a couple of days or weeks.
  • Fourth - his friends are your friends!

"The Dying Swan", or the Seventh Rule

There is no more defenseless and attention-hungry creature than a sick man. Indeed, even in conscious infancy (the age of three years or more), your boy was taught that if he is sick, he is the center of the universe. Now you can not do a lot, everyone walks on tiptoe and talks in whispers. And it's so nice when you are looked after, and the disease gives carte blanche to this.

So at this moment, the prospect of showing yourself from the best side opens up in front of you. With his own hands, cook chicken broth, so useful in his "mortal" state, spoon-feed him, straighten his blanket and put his favorite films on DVD. And if you want to breathe life into your "dying swan" to the maximum, then you can do it all in a nurse's dressing gown from a sex shop.

Men and women have different psychology, and this can cause disagreement in a relationship. But everything is in your hands: write the script of your life yourself, become the director and the main character of the story of your own happiness.