When you can potty train a girl. Optimal age for potty training. The right time: at what age to potty train a child

01.08.2019

The question of when and how to potty train the child arises before the parents, as a rule, when the child begins to sit down and get up.
The mother begins to track the slightest signs of when the baby wants to go to the toilet. But is it necessary so early? Or wait for the baby to understand himself and asks?

When should you potty train your child?

There is no single correct answer.
Each parent will have their own truth. Someone thinks that the sooner the better, no matter what methods, and someone prefers to wait for a softer and more natural addiction.

My opinion on this matter: children from birth should be periodically left without a diaper. This will be beneficial for the baby, as his skin will breathe and is less likely to get from diapers.
Another reason not to prolong this cystitis. The feces in the diaper are distributed throughout the body and enter the urinary tract and cause inflammation of the bladder. Girls are more susceptible to this because of their anatomical structure.
To do this more often, gradually completely eliminating the "armor" from life. Even if he gets his pants wet, there is nothing wrong with that, but the baby will feel the processes taking place with him, and will quickly learn to control his urges, and even begin to tell you that he wants to go to the toilet.
More often ask if the child wants to go to the toilet, plant them on the potty often and always after meals, before going to bed and after. But if he resists, it is worth postponing the training, otherwise he can restrain the urge and this will lead to psychological constipation.
After two or three days of frequent planting, determine the frequency when the child goes to the potty and plant it by a certain time.
If the baby has learned to ask for it himself without a reminder, still control the time and remind him if he has not used the potty for more than three hours.
When you need to potty train a child, the optimal age is 7-8 months, but he will not yet be aware of the actions taking place. It is generally accepted that the older, the easier it is to potty train him. But, nevertheless, I think that there is no point in delaying until 3-4 years, it is most reasonable to teach to potty in the period from 14 to 24 months.

Never stimulate urination with sounds such as pouring water. This method forms the wrong reflex: first the pot, then the urge, but on the contrary, first the urge, then the pot.

How to understand that the child is ready to potty.

The toddler knows how to take off and put on pants, panties, socks himself. Without some self-help skills, potty training is useless.
After noon sleep, the baby remains dry, this indicates that he is able to control his bladder.
Knows the names of body parts and can show them.
Can sit for several minutes looking at a book or toy.
The kid feels when it is necessary to go to great lengths, he calms down and concentrates.
He understands speech and carries out some assignments, it is easier for such a kid to explain what they want from him.
Feels uncomfortable with dirty or damp clothing.

The sequence of training.

The first thing to do when teaching a child to potty is to wean the baby from diapers at home, gradually planting it on the pot during the day, just even sit down, sit, and look at everything around.
Second, when this is achieved, you need to accustom to asking to use the toilet on the street.
And the most difficult thing for many children and parents is to teach a child to get up to use the toilet at night.

Now, how to potty train a child:

Choose this item carefully. It should be comfortable for the baby, evoke pleasant emotions. It is better if he has handles, a lid, for boys, a protruding part in front. I do not advise buying musical, singing pots. Still, the child must understand what this thing is for, and all the distractions are useless.
The pot should not be cold, this will cause negative emotions and refusal to sit on it, so give preference to plastic models.
Decide on the words that will be called the actions associated with the pot: "ka-ka", "pi-pi" and others.
It should always be within reach of the baby.
If the kid is bored with sitting on the potty, then just offer to take your favorite toy or book with you to look at the pictures.
Let it get used to it, explain what it is for, let the child sit on it, without taking off his pants, study it from all sides.
Only after you have given the opportunity to sit dressed several times, you can start training. Do not rush to do it all in one day, make it clear what is happening to him.
It is necessary to purchase pants and panties that can be easily removed and put on, as well as short T-shirts so that they do not have to be lifted when you sit down.
As soon as the baby went to the toilet in a diaper, then put him on the potty. Do this at the first stage 2-3 times a day. Each time, explain what it is for. Throw in a dirty diaper for clarity.
It is very good if there are older brothers or sisters who can demonstrate the purpose of this item.
If they are not there, then there are dolls on sale that can not only eat, but also go to the toilet, which will clearly show the whole process. By the way, thanks to such a doll, the baby can learn very quickly.
When the baby is used to the pot, seize the moment. Plant after sleep, after meals, before bed. To make the process go faster, put the pot in the bathroom and turn on the water. As you know, the sound of pouring water causes the urge to urinate.
If this does not help, or you simply cannot "drive" your child to the pot, then connect his favorite toys to the process. It is unlikely that the child will resist if his favorite bear or bunny will offer him to go to the potty.
It is clear that at all the previous stages the child was helped by adults. But after the baby gets used to the potty, it is important to teach him how to use it on his own, take off his pants, sit down, pour out after himself. But take your time, act gradually, all this will be, but over time.

Tips for parents on how to potty train a child?

The main advice on how to potty train a child is not to impose or keep the baby from going to the potty by force. This can lead to backlash, rejection and protest.

Don't look back at others. That is, for example, a neighbor's child already at 10 months goes to the toilet himself, and your child still wears a diaper and does not ask to go to the toilet. Remember everyone is different, look only at your child. Look closely at his behavior, he himself will tell you when "it's time".

Do not punish him for going to the toilet past the pot, and do not try to over-praise for success, for example, backing it up with the purchase of a gift. All this can lead to subsequent expectations of a gift for the slightest correct action. If you manage to go to the toilet, just mark it and say sweet words.

One more piece of advice on how to potty train a child, do not stand above his soul, even though the child is small, it may be difficult for him to do his “business” under your sensitive gaze. You may need to put the pot in a secluded place.

Be patient, the teaching process, as a rule, takes more than one day or even a week, exceptions may be, perhaps, illustrative examples in the form of older children or a doll. In this case, potty training can be done very quickly.

If the child is accustomed to the potty at home during the day, then move on to the second stage of outdoor training. It is better to do this in the summer, taking extra clothes with you, and suggesting to go to the toilet before leaving.

Do not listen to other people's advice on when and how to potty train your child. This is an individual process and should be based on your observations.

Night weaning from a diaper can be the longest, as a rule, only by 3-4 years of age the child is able to control his urges at night. Do not drink a lot at night, and as soon as the diaper remains dry for several days after the night, it can be concluded that he has learned to control himself in his sleep.

A small child gradually learns something new in his life, learns something. And the development of the skills of sending natural needs to the pot, and not to diapers or tights, is one of the most important stages in the life of a baby and his parents.

In this article, we'll take a closer look at when to introduce him to the potty, as well as ways to potty train your child. Today there are quite a few of them, but we will get acquainted only with the most effective and popular ones.

It is important to understand that the effectiveness of potty training largely depends on the psychological state of the child. The kid must understand why they are trying to put him on an object unfamiliar to him. Therefore, each method is preceded by an assessment of the preparation of the "student".

In some cases, the process of potty training can take quite a long time, up to several months. Therefore, you should be patient.

General Provisions

A pot is a new object for a child, and in some cases even frightening, because the kid does not understand why they are trying to seat him. That is why sometimes the child cries on the potty and does not want to sit on it. And at this stage, many parents make a big mistake, starting to scold the baby and raise their voices. Naturally, the opposite effect is achieved.

But when the result is achieved (if the child was able to go to the potty), praise must necessarily follow. But you should not encourage the crumb with various delicacies. Enough sweet words!

What is the optimal age for potty training?

Almost all parents are interested in when to put a child on a potty. The most optimal age for this is 18-24 months. Often mothers worry that the child is already a year old, and he does not want to sit on the potty. This is especially clearly observed if one of the parents brags that their son or daughter is already making up for the pot.

In fact, a baby under the age of 18 months is simply not able to control the filling of his intestines and bladder. Therefore, he simply cannot ask to be put on a pot. Reflexes work more here. Those. the child does all his business, because he was jailed. If the parents missed the moment, then wet pants are provided.

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But at the age of two, the situation is completely different. If a child at 2 years old does not go to the potty, then there is the possibility of speech influence, i.e. you can talk to him. In addition, at this age, the baby himself is able to coherently say what he wants.

Age 18-24 months conditional. It all depends on the individual characteristics of the child. But still, there are certain signs that will clearly make you understand that the baby is ready for the learning process:

If the interval between urinations has increased markedly. If it has reached two o'clock, then you can safely proceed;
If the child has developed an approximate bowel emptying regime;
The child already understands the meaning of the words "write" and "poop". This may be still an age when these processes are not controlled by the child;
The child begins to show a craving for independence. This should be encouraged in every possible way;
The child is already paying attention to wet pants. If you have set yourself the goal of potty training, then in no case scold him. Here, focus more on what is uncomfortable and unpleasant for him;
The child understands what the pot is for. In no case should the baby treat him like a toy.

If the indicated signs are absent, then it is important to carry out explanatory work with the baby in order to develop certain skills. Here you should be prepared for the fact that the process of potty training will drag on.

How to teach a child to go to the potty: basic ways

Today, many works and even books have been written on the topic of potty training. Child psychologists have developed certain techniques, the most popular of which are Gina Ford's 7 Day Potty Training Method and 3 Days Potty Training Method. But they all boil down to five basic rules, which can even be called ways. Let's get acquainted with them in more detail.

Personal example

It is already at the genetic level in each of us that we copy the behavior of those people who are our authority. In the natural environment, this behavior saves the lives of the young. Therefore, do not be shy. The child must see what is required of him and how it is done.

And the main advice on how to potty train a child is the complete exclusion of words such as "must", "must" and the like. Children's curiosity after repeated repetition will take effect.

Develop skill in the game

In a child, the pot should be associated with vivid positive impressions. For example, you can make a makeshift target and place it on the bottom of the pot so that the child hits the center of it. You can play "sea battle" by sinking enemy ships. It all depends on the imagination of the parents.

It is important not to overdo it. Avoid using pots equipped with various "bells and whistles", for example, a steering wheel. They will only distract the kid from the main purpose of why he sat on the potty.

Change of location will help

If the child has a negative attitude towards the pot, then after a pause, offer him an alternative. Try purchasing a highchair with a potty or change seats. It is possible that he will be more sympathetic to such changes.

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Create a ritual

This method is effective because children are very fond of the usual actions. Probably, every parent is faced with a situation when their child asked many times in a row to watch a certain cartoon or read a book.

Try making the potty sitting in the morning a certain ritual to get your baby's attention.

Show the benefits of adult behavior

If you do not know how to potty train a child of 3 years old, then this method will be the most optimal. Outline for him the circle of privileges that await him if he goes about his "business" in the pot.

In no case should coercion be used, but the consequences should be known to him. It could be your favorite bike's soiled seat or your best panties, etc.

Potty retraining procedure

Sometimes situations arise that the child has stopped going to the potty. Moreover, it can be even at the age of 3-4 years. The reasons for this can be different:

A change of scenery. This can be moving, entering a kindergarten, etc. Such changes can cause protest in the baby even in those things that he used to do with pleasure;
At the age of three, the baby begins a turning point in the formation of his character. During this period, he seeks to do the opposite. In this case, parents just need to be patient;
Family problems can also affect. If parents swear in front of a child, he may withdraw into himself, which will definitely affect his behavior;
When teething or a painful condition in a baby, thoughts are directed in a different direction. Therefore, the child can stop asking for a potty.

Therefore, when re-potty training, it is important to determine the cause of the refusal and direct all efforts to eliminate it. Again, no pressure should be applied and be patient.

As you can see, potty training is a complex and systemic process. But with the right approach, no problems will arise. In this case, the time can be spent in different ways, because each child is individual. Therefore, the terms indicated in various methods are very conditional. Stick to these five methods and the potty training process will be greatly simplified.

The child's learning process begins from the very first days of a child's life. And it consists not only of various pedagogical methods, but mostly of ordinary life experience - the knowledge of the world by trial and error. That is, the child learns everything that he sees around him. However, there comes a time when the baby has to be taught to special activities that exclusively concern him. It is on this topic that I would like to dwell now. How (Komarovsky and his methodology), what to do, and what actions are best to refuse, so as not to injure the psyche of your crumbs - this will be discussed further.

About the baby's readiness for the pot

While the baby is still very small, he perceives the pot as a toy. For him, this is just a piece of furniture. The little one does not yet understand all its significance and necessity. Therefore, you should not scold your child if he starts playing with the pot. By the way, it is very important not to miss this moment, because this is a great reason to start teaching your baby to this hitherto unknown subject. You can try to plant toys on it, try to sit down the baby himself. But if the crumb resists and cries a lot, while you need to leave this venture for a while. Most likely, the baby is simply not ready yet.

Here it is worth saying that if mothers start planting their baby on a pot at the age of 8-9 months, and the baby does everything that is supposed to be done, we can only talk about a well-developed reflex. The kid will write in the pot completely unconsciously. This can be achieved mainly through training (most often if punishment is used). Controlled urination at such a young age is out of the question. And all because the child's nervous system is not yet completely ready for this.

More specifically about the numbers

Before the age of one year, a potty for a baby is not yet a conscious toilet item. As mentioned above, it is perceived by the baby, rather, as a toy or piece of furniture. Until the first year of life, the baby can, of course, be introduced to him, but this will practically not affect anything and will only lengthen the training time. Awareness, concept and, most importantly, the first signs of self-control come to a baby at about the age of 18 months. For some, this may happen a few months earlier, but mostly later. You need to understand that all numbers are conditional. And you just need to know your baby in order to understand whether the child is ready to be planted on the potty.

About day and night landings

Understanding how to potty train a child, Komarovsky also says that you need to take into account the time of day. If at a year and a half the baby can begin to control the urges of his body in the daytime, then with the night period, things are not so simple. At night, children can pee even up to 4 years of age. And there is nothing wrong with that. After all, night control in children is about 3-3.5 years old. Parents should not forget about this.

About child readiness indicators

Often moms and dads wonder how to potty train a child a year? Can a baby be taught such skills? Pediatricians claim that there are certain indicators that will tell you that the baby is completely ready for planting:

The pot is not scary for the child, the baby is not afraid of it and sometimes even tries to sit on it himself, even without lowering his pants.
One of the signs of a baby's readiness is his ability to walk and sit on his own.
The next indicator is that the child can tell his parents about his desires, the needs of the body.
The baby understands when adults turn to him with various requests.
One of the signs is that the child understands the commands of the parents.
If the child understands the praise and encouragement from adults, he is also partially ready to be potted.
Komarovsky argues that if a baby shows his dissatisfaction with a full diaper or wet pants, he is also ready for training.

If all these indicators, or at least most of them are present, experts are sure that you can begin the process of accustoming the crumbs to your pot.

The time to start training is not worth it

It sometimes happens that the child is afraid of the pot, he is uncomfortable on it. This indicates that the time has not yet come for the first accustoming to this toilet item. However, here it is necessary to strictly distinguish between the manipulative behavior of the child and really fear or discomfort. Other indicators that indicate that you need to wait with the first plantings:

During a baby's nervous tension or illness, it is not worth starting the learning process.
Time for a change is not the best hour for potty training. If a family moves, is about to be replenished, etc., this is already stress for the crumbs. And training during this period will be completely ineffective.
And the last point is the lack of the above skills, which indicate the baby's readiness to plant on the pot.

About choosing a pot

Where should the training process begin? Of course, with the right choice of the pot itself! What should it be? Manufacturers today offer a huge selection. It can be a musical pot for children, in the form of a horse or a car, with or without a back. Doctor Komarovsky advises choosing the simplest one. In this case, the baby will not perceive the pot as a toy. And the music pot runs the risk of developing a reflex to defecate to the music, which will turn out to be a big problem as a result. The rules for choosing this piece of toilet:

As mentioned above, the pot should be the simplest. The only thing is that you can choose the color that the child likes the most.
The presence of a backrest does not hurt. The kid should be comfortable to sit on his "throne".
It must be remembered that the legs of the crumbs should be at right angles (or the knees may be slightly raised). This is very important, because otherwise the crumb runs the risk of earning hemorrhoids or rectal cracks, constantly pressing on the diaphragm with the legs.
The pot should also be as stable as possible. The kid can spin while sitting on it, and if he falls several times, he may completely refuse to sit on him.

Potty Training Steps: Getting Started

So, as Komarovsky advises not to rush, but to divide the learning process itself into several important stages. The first is familiarization. So, it's good if mom goes with her child to buy a pot. The baby will be able to choose exactly what he likes. You just need to remember that there is no need to doubt the choice of the baby. So, the pot is bought. Now it needs to be placed in a prominent place in the child's room. We must try to explain to the child what it is and what this object is intended for. It is best to illustrate your stories with pictures from books or an example of planting your favorite soft toy on a pot. You should not immediately try to put your child there. Let him get used to the new inhabitant of his room.

First planting

It is worth remembering that if the child does not sit on the potty, do not insist on it. You just need to forget about this science for a few days and be distracted. And after a while try again. So, the first planting should be carried out at the most convenient time for bowel movement: after sleep or half an hour after eating. In this case, the child will see the result. And, of course, do not forget that the crumb needs to be praised after what has been done. Encouragement by children is perceived very positively.

If for the first time the child does not want to take off his pants and sit on the potty, you can not require this for now. It's good if the baby at least sits down on this object. This period generally takes from one week to 10 days.

Conscious hikes

Let's figure out further how to potty train a child. Komarovsky says that if the baby is no longer afraid of this piece of furniture and is calm about it, you can plant it more often. Approximately every 2-3 hours. Often mothers call this period "to catch a pee". That is, parents are just trying to catch the moment when the child may want to defecate. This must be accompanied by questions about whether the child wants to write. They need to be formulated in a form convenient for their crumbs. This stage also lasts about ten days.

However, you shouldn't be completely attached to numbers. After all, all children develop in different ways, each baby takes a certain amount of time to learn. For some, the entire learning process may take a month and a half, and for others, as much as six months.

About training and rapid learning

Some parents are sincerely convinced that you can potty train your baby very quickly. Especially after reading the articles "potty training in 7 days" or the like. This, of course, can be done. However, only by intimidating your baby. Yes, many parents boast that their children are already asking for a potty every year. However, they will never tell anyone at what cost they achieve this. If you beat and scold the child after each urination in the pants, keep the baby on the pot for half an hour until the result is visible, you can, of course, achieve quick learning. But is it worth it to scoff at your child, distorting his psyche from an early age? What to do in this case - only the parents of the crumbs decide.

How not to discourage your child from going to the potty

There are three main taboos that all parents should keep in mind:

You can not insist and force the child to sit on the potty, if he does not want to do so.
It is strictly forbidden to keep the baby on the pot forcibly.
You can't scold a crumb for peeing in his pants. At first, it will be very difficult for a child to control the urges of his body.

If the parents have made at least one of the above mistakes, they risk discouraging the baby's desire to land on the potty. It should also be remembered that this behavior of a child can be the most common protest against violent actions of adults. There will definitely not be any sense from this.

About diapers and a potty

How much does a potty for children cost? Its price depends on many factors. The cheapest of them costs about 100 rubles, and there are no upper bounds for the cost. But, having bought this piece of toilet, you need to remember that you should not abruptly give up diapers. Moreover, pediatricians claim that wearing them does not in any way affect the process of potty training. For the first time, diapers will be needed for night and day sleep. It will also be difficult to do without them on a walk. But gradually you will still have to give up diapers, but just not to the detriment of the child.

As a small conclusion, I would like to say that whether the child will have a pot with a back, in the form of a horse or a musical one, the whole learning process depends only on the parents. It must be remembered that it is important to be patient and calm. You also need to be consistent in your decisions. That is, having decided to teach your baby, you need to do it regularly, without arranging for yourself or your little one a vacation for a day or even a week. And most importantly, the whole process of the child should be associated with a good mood. Only in this case, the result will not be long in coming, and the learning process itself will take place without the child's tears.

The following timing of pot-related reactions is highlighted:

Reaction name	Approximate age at onset of the reaction
First reactions to wet or dirty pants	1 year 2 months
The first reactions to the need for the toilet are with anxiety or voice.	1 year 6 months
Let the adult know that he wants to go to the toilet, by means available to him (not by words).	1 year 10 months
Stays dry during the day.	2 years
He takes off his pants before sitting on the pot.	2 years
Asks to go to the toilet using words	2 years 3 months
Under the supervision of an adult, he goes to the potty (takes off his pants, sits on the potty, dresses himself).	3 years

It is clearly seen from this table that before one and a half years, there is no point in requiring the child to have conscious skills in using the pot. A year and a half is the beginning of the path to the pot. Only at 3 years old, the brain of most babies matures to flawless use of the pot. As usual, there are exceptions to the rule - children with a fast pace of development.

If the baby is one and a half years old, it is time for active actions to be introduced to the pot. Some of the most effective tips:

The most effective way to become familiar with the potty is to make the child aware of its functions. To do this, it is necessary for the child to repeatedly explain the purpose of the pot, to demonstrate the sequence of its use.
Play around with toys. Take toys to the pot. Rubber animals with holes are well suited for this. They can be filled with water and then emptied into a pot. For this we used a doll that could drink and write. But I cannot boast that it helped us a lot. Still, everything has its time.
Praise good results. Remember that you need to be able to praise, otherwise it can lead to the fact that the child will form the wrong self-esteem, which can later bring disappointment in the parents and in himself. Praise the child's performance, not the child. Say that the child did the right thing, hit the mark, etc. Pay attention to the fact that the pants remain clean and dry and that it is pleasant to walk in such pants. Share your positive emotions, tell us how glad you are that the baby has learned to use the potty.
In one and a half to two years, it is worth giving up the use of diapers during the day, if you have not done so earlier. When the baby learns to stay dry throughout the day, you can move on to the next stage - removing the diaper at night. The second stage can also take a long time, be prepared for this.
Don't be zealous! A child is the same person who has will and freedom of choice. If he feels compelled, you can get the opposite effect - refusal. So, at one time, for my "efforts" I received a complete refusal from the pot, during which my child did his business "anywhere", but not in the pot.
Many children aged 1.5-2 years begin to value independence. Using this, the potty familiarization process can be emphasized by entrusting the child with self-selection of the pot in the store. If you already have a pot, then, for sure, the second will not hurt (the first can be sent to the dacha or to the grandmother). If the child does not take the potty seriously, you can offer to purchase a toilet seat cover and go to the toilet "like an adult." Do not forget to coordinate this question with the baby in advance 🙂, this way you will arouse the child's expectation and interest. Also, buying a new pot is a good "reset" of the relationship in case of rejection.
In addition to the above, toys and books can be involved in teaching that reveal the essence of the purpose of the pot. For example, the books "Max and Pot" (Labirint).

Once again, I draw your attention to the fact that the conscious use of the pot in most cases occurs in the third year. Of course, it is possible to successfully engage in the development of conditioned reflexes to the pot (planting) even up to a year, but from this the time of awareness of this process will not radically change. Therefore, all of these tips can be periodically tried and observed changes in the child's relationship to the potty.

How to potty train a child | Our chronology

I don’t think this part of the article is in any way useful, since the terms and conditions of admission are very individual. But I think that she will be interesting, the poet I will give our chronology:

After reading the information that children can walk consciously to the potty as early as one year old, from the beginning of the first year we used diapers only for a walk.We slept in the best traditions of the previous generation - diapers and oilcloth. Now, I can absolutely say for sure that it was in vain and did not at all speed up our introduction to the pot.
At the end of 1 year 3 months, we successfully started practicing diaper-free walking. Yana did not know how to give signals about urges, but she learned to endure. By that time, I had received a persistent refusal from the pot due to obsessive attachment to it 😥 or problems with the chair (although they were observed on the strength a couple of times and were short-lived). It was impossible for Jan to sit on the pot, even if necessary. At any attempt to sit on the pot, crying and screaming were observed. Therefore, when returning from walks, our home pants were necessarily dirty, while the pot was idle in the corner.
At the age of 2, exactly the first rapprochement with the pot took place. Yana forgot about the negative to the pot and agreed to sit down on it, learned to take off / put on her pants, groan when needed "in a big way." This required active participation - sitting next to him on the toilet, encouraging and commenting on what was happening. There were many misses during this period. Also, at the beginning of the third year, Yana learned to give the first signals about the presence of a need - she began to fiddle with her panties and whimper while walking.
At 2 years 2 months, the skill of using the pot was brought almost to perfection. When she was at home, Yana learned to use the pot on her own, and to beg on the street.
At 2 years 4 months, we learned to articulate the need in a small way - "s-ss-s".
The only moment that requires improvement is night sleep. At the moment, I have to wake her up at night. Some practice evening fluid restriction. It is effective, but in my opinion, the need for fluid for the child's body is more important than a dry bed.

The road to dry bed | Revelation

The first step in getting to grips with the pot is to use it regularly during the day. The second more difficult stage is the independent awakening of the child at night. Depending on the specifics of the psyche, some people sleep more sensitively, others "cannot be woken up with a gun."

My child is from the "Can't Wake Up" category. But I am a correct mother, so I made every effort to make Yana learn to wake up when the need arose. Since a year, I stopped using diapers for sleep, in the expectation that the feeling of wet diapers would somehow speed up the process. The waiting process dragged on for up to 4.5 years. Until that moment, wet sheets and a blanket were almost every day. I did not switch to diapers, as I was afraid that removing the factor of wet sheets would reduce the child's chances of feeling the situation. Only at 4.5 Yana began to wake up on her own, wake us up and ask to go to the toilet.

There are many approaches to treating nocturnal enuresis:

Wake up in the middle of the night on a potty... There is a hypothesis that if you wake up a child at night, he will get used to waking up regularly and will wake up when he urges to use the toilet. This hypothesis was tested by my mother on my brother for many years. You know it doesn't work! My brother always had such a deep sleep that even in infancy he did not wake up at night, and in the morning he had to be woken up for feeding. The first years after the birth of her brother, my mother had a bonus - good nights. Most moms can only dream about it. But this bonus was later compensated for: if the brother was not woken up for a pot in the middle of the night, he wrote to bed. Therefore, I had to wake up and wake up the child in order to bring it to the potty. This was done almost every night until the school years.
Lack of a specific hormone... One of the opinions of the reasons for the inability to wake up at night out of need is a lack of a certain hormone. Those. the synthesis of this hormone in the body of children can be formed at different ages. In most cases - in 2-3 years, in some cases later. With this approach, children are prescribed a course of drugs to stabilize the hormone level with medication.
Psychological clamps. This option is more close to me. I believe that a child who is peeing at night cannot wake up due to the fact that the procedure for waking up when urinating is not configured in the head. If the child is regularly woken up at night, then the installation of this procedure in the child's head will not happen due to lack of need. The bed is always dry and comfortable, because mom and dad take care of it. It turns out there is no reason to learn to wake up at night. If the child is not woken up to the potty in the middle of the night, but let him feel wet sheets and a fetid odor, thereby we provide the child with a good reason to learn to wake up. And yes, the solution to the psychological clamp is carried out in a variety of ways. I know that professionals deal with them quickly, but I am an ordinary mom and everything I tried for a long time did not work. Yana started asking for the toilet in the middle of the night after moving to a new apartment - apparently the stress from the new place of residence turned out to be stronger, and against this background, the procedure for waking up with the need to urinate began to work.

How to potty train a child | Planting

After reading the text above, many will say, “Your experience is not interesting. A friend's child has been going to the potty since 6 months. They practiced planting from birth. And we will also. " I do not want to upset anyone, but I must warn you that planting is not suitable for everyone.

For those who are not in the know, I explain that getting out is capturing signals (crying, grunting, etc.) of the baby when urging to go to the toilet, followed by placing the child over the sink or pot for emptying.

I'll start with our experience. When Yana was 1 month old, after reading books about planting, I began to pick up urge signals and hold her over the sink. At the same time, the number of wet diapers was reduced by about 80%. I was as happy as an elephant and even imagined myself smarter than most. When making plans for the future, I hoped that by the year we would forever forget about wet pants.

At the age of three months, Yana began to perceive her sensations when urging to go to the toilet as normal. She was no longer afraid of what was about to happen. Since then, the urge no longer caused inconvenience and did not cause anxiety. At this point, all the signals disappeared, by which one could assume a desire to empty and our landing came to its logical conclusion!

Subsequently, after studying the diaries of a few mothers who successfully practiced planting from the first months of life and a book about planting, I came to the following conclusions:

The best time to start planting is 1-2 months.
Planting is based on the formation of conditioned reflexes. Conditioned reflexes are fickle. They can mutate and fade away.
In connection with the development of brain activity, new bright emotions become available to the child as early as 3-4 months. At this time, the urge signals become familiar and, depending on the emotionality of the individual, they may practically not differ in emotions from other impressions received during the day. In this regard, mistakes are more frequent in which a child who does not want to use the toilet is planted. Simply put - mom confuses the emotions from urges with other emotions. After a series of such errors, the conditioned reflex may fade away.
Planting is very similar to training. Training is a way of teaching animals using unconscious mechanisms (conditioned reflexes and skills). A conscious attitude to the potty appears at the age of 1.5-2 years, earlier potty training is based on conditioned reflexes. Planting skills are based on the success of the "training" of the baby. With this comparison, I do not want to offend anyone or dissuade anyone from landing, but I did not start talking about him for a reason. By studying the effectiveness of animal training, you can better understand the factors of failure. Certain types of temperament are more susceptible to certain types of training. Of course, in relation to the child, we will admit the type of "training" only on the basis of rewards (affection) and positive motivation (promises of comfort). It follows from this that some children cannot be taught to plant. The reason for this is not at all the wrong approach, but the peculiarities of the child's temperament, in particular the brightness and regularity of the manifestation of emotions, and individual factors in the formation of conditioned reflexes. Some children, after a series of successful plantings, fix this bundle in their memory. At subsequent urges, they try to reproduce the sequence of actions from their successful experience - "crying, landing, encouraging in the gentle voice of mom." Often moms add a negative “ah-ah-ah” when they fail. Depending on the tone used, "ah-ah-ah" can also serve as a punishment or as a statement of a negative result. Modern psychology has proven the harm of using rudeness, so I will not develop the topic of rude tone. A statement of a negative result in a soft, persistent tone at an unreasonable age is not effective and can cause the opposite result - curiosity and interest in sounds. However, I do not consider using “ah-ah-ah” in the first year of life as bad practice. This expression can be attributed to emotional communication, and any high-quality communication, as you know, is useful for the development of a child's thinking.

Completion

Unfortunately, there are no wonderful secrets to instant potty exposure, so I advise you to be patient and find the strength to stop using diapers in time. I repeat once again that early rejection of diapers will not give anything but extra washing. Optimally in the region of one and a half years - two years in accordance with the maturation of thinking for the introduction to the pot.

All joy and good luck in mastering new skills! Finally, a couple of questions for collecting statistics:

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How to potty train a child. Maturation time of the necessary reactions. Mum's mistakes.

About the author Mama bore

In the recent past, a software engineer. Favorite ASP.NET, MS SQL platforms. Experience in programming for 14 years. Has been blogging since 2013 (Yana was born). In 2018, she turned her hobby into a favorite job. Now I am a blogger!

How to potty train a child. Theory and our experience of staying from a year without diapers: 15 comments

Ala
I like your site)) however, before 4.5 years old, changing wet sheets is just mega patience ... And what good is it for the child? spoiled nerves, her own and the child). After 2 years, CAM took off the diaper and started asking for a potty. In the morning he often wakes up dry, but sometimes not and I'm not going to cancel the diaper yet.
Anna

Dreams about when a child will write and poop on a potty excite the minds of more than one generation of parents. Does he like to walk wet? The child is growing up, and with it your impatience. I want to reassure you: this will definitely happen, but it does not always happen at the time you need. As they say, patience and work will grind everything. And you will need a lot of patience. Of course, there are neat people from the cradle, but still the bulk of children do not strain from walking under themselves several times a day.

One of the stages of growing up a child is the ability to control natural needs. For example, go to the potty on your own. All parents ask themselves the question: how to teach a child to go to the potty and what age is most favorable for this. There are many opinions on this, but we will consider only a few popular theories.

Early planting of the child on the potty

As a rule, many parents are supporters of this method and begin to plant a child in the first days of life. True, the baby is not yet sitting and relieving himself over a basin, a bathtub and other containers. And from about 6 months, children are planted in a pot. Parents stimulate the process of urination with the sounds of writing or opening water. The baby is disembarked after sleeping, feeding, walking. The most observant parents already know when the child wants to potty. It should be noted that this method has several advantages:

saves money on diapers;
strengthens the emotional connection between mother and child, as the mother constantly listens to her baby, thereby learning to understand him;
and also hardens the baby, as his pants are often removed.

However, it should be emphasized that a child at such a small age cannot control the processes of urination. But thanks to constant repetition of writing and writing, a conditioned reflex is triggered in a child.
You should still wait up to a year or three.
Each child is different and their bladder and intestines function differently. Most babies begin to control their excretory processes after a year and later. As a rule, the interval is from 1 to 3. The advantages of this method are many, but the most important thing is that a child after a year is able to:

convey to parents what he wants;
knows his body parts and what the garments are called;
understands the meaning of the words poop and write;
knows how to undress himself;
imitates parents as well as older children.
That is why at this age, the path to the pot is led consciously.

Potty training, rules

Remove the diaper from the baby. He must understand that when he pees his pants will get wet. And many children do not like this, and at first the child only shows wet pants and you should not scold him for this. You just need to clearly explain that you need to relieve yourself in a pot, and not in pants.
Put the child on the potty after sleeping, walking, bathing. And don't make him sit on it for more than 5 minutes.
The baby should be praised for every victory, then he will have an incentive to please his mother again and again!
Involve all family members. Let the father and older children show you what the toilet is for. Place the toy on a pot as an example.
You should not entertain the baby on the potty with toys. He must clearly understand for what needs the pot and not confuse it with fun.
If the child is sitting on the potty reluctantly, you should not force him, as you will only cause his harm and negative attitude.
Do not scold your child for wet pants.
It is worth noting that the period for training a child to potty is individual. As a rule, the urge to go to the potty occurs from 18-24 months, when the child can speak openly about his needs. But, absolutely all children learn this and do not worry about it ahead of time.
Here are some simple tips on how to teach your baby to go to the potty for all mothers. The whole difficult period of initiation into hygiene will pass quickly.

Choosing a time to potty train your child

Your girlfriends boast that they've dropped their kids over the bathtub since birth, and since then, only one diaper a day gets dirty. And from friends, the baby began to go to the potty from 8 months. Don't worry if you don't have these accomplishments. This is not a super quality developed in these kids, it's just that the parents have studied well the habits of the children, and they know roughly when their child wants to go to the toilet. They plant him at this favorable time - and (lo and behold !!!) the baby does his job. Over time, the time to "go" to the toilet shifts, because the child grows, and accidents become more and more. It turns out that it was the adults who learned to use the pot, and not their offspring himself.

As soon as the child begins to sit confidently (some boys are already sitting almost at 5 months, girls CANNOT be planted, even if they really want to, up to 6-7 months), you can start getting to know the pot. Do not mark the date by which you commit to potty training with a red felt-tip pen. So you will only wear down your nerves and ruin the life of your baby. After such "teaching" the little one may simply hate this symbol of cleanliness and hygiene. It all depends on the child, and when he is physically and emotionally ready, he will easily and naturally sit on the potty.

When to start potty training

Psychologists and pediatric pediatricians point out that meaningfully babies begin to use the potty from about two years old, some a little earlier, and there are children to whom this science is given only by the age of 4 years. Until that time, bowel movements occur by themselves. There are signs by which you can determine the child's readiness to write and poop on the pot, and not in the pants.

The kid in a "dangerous" moment runs to the side, crouches and groans.
The panties or diaper stays dry for several hours in a row.
After naps, the child wakes up dry. Although many children, even when they have already learned how to use the potty, pee during sleep: day and night,
The child goes to the toilet regularly.
The kid points to the contents of the diaper, demonstrating that an accident happened there.
The child may say that he wants to use the toilet, or that he has already gone into his pants.
The kid gives you a clean diaper.

There may be other habits, everything happens strictly individually, so do not panic if you have not noted any of the above signs.

The revolution is happening in the minds!
In general, for a start, I recommend just talking with the child about what to write and poop on the potty; for clarity, you can take him with you to the adult toilet and show what his parents are doing there. It is necessary to get used to the idea of the need to use the pot gradually, lovingly. You have not seen healthy adults who suddenly, for no reason at all, wrote at meetings in the office, although the cases are different. All this, of course, is a joke. In fact, time will do its job, and the child will understand exactly what they want from him.

How is it correct?

Before putting the child on the potty, pre-warm this object in order for the child to sit comfortably on it. You can simply rinse the "night vase" with hot water and dry thoroughly. That's all. The item is ready for use. Do not panic if the child does not like sitting on the potty, at the slightest dissatisfaction on the part of your child, the procedure should be stopped.

It is necessary to put the child on the pot at a certain time, when the likelihood of a favorable outcome is high. For example, right after sleep or when the baby is drinking juice.

There is no need to draw schedules for the departure of natural needs, for that they are natural. Just watch your baby's facial expressions, moms usually know how their babies signal an impending flood.
Offer him a pot from time to time, ask if he wants to go to the toilet. Follow the tips regularly and without pressure, and you and your child will succeed!

And so the baby does his thing on the potty to the delight of his beloved parents. You can all be praised, but do not forget that he will not automatically go to the toilet soon. So, remind your kid about the potty at a time favorable for all sorts of "dirty deeds". It's so cool: a clean, tidy baby and a dozen times smaller pile of dirty linen in the bathroom.

When

The ability to independently go to the toilet (use the potty) is an indispensable proof of "adulthood". Therefore, it is quite understandable that all parents are looking forward to the onset of this moment in the life of the baby, and want to bring it closer. Sharp experiences are added by the stories of grandmothers, neighbors and acquaintances about how their "smart little guys" do their business "like an adult" already from 7 months. There are even those who boast that their babies "relieve a small need" above the pot as early as 5 months. All these fables kindle real passions around the pot and thereby upset the parents of children who are less dexterous in this matter, and those who have the problem of "wet pants" at 4-5, and even at 6-7 years old. Let's try to figure out where there are "myths" and where is the reality in the story of the pot, as well as why problems arise after the potting skill has already been formed, and do with it.
Unconditioned and conditioned reflex.

A newborn baby does not control the processes of urination and defecation, they are subject to the actions of an unconditioned reflex, which does not require the participation of the cerebral cortex. Potty training is the introduction of an element of conscious control over these processes (involvement of the cerebral cortex), and therefore the transformation of an unconditioned reflex into a conditioned one. Sounds reasonable, but what does this mean in practice? This means that in order for a child to consciously control his natural needs, she must reach a certain level of development of the nervous system (cerebral cortex), and organs involved in the processes of urination and defecation.

In this regard, the following age stages can be distinguished:

from 0 to 6 months. The baby urinates 15 to 20 times a day.

The kid is still quite capable of controlling this process - urination occurs reflexively;

from 6 months to 1 year. The amount of urination is reduced to 10 times a day.

The baby begins to feel when his bladder is full. At the same time, he may start to be capricious or cry, thus giving signs to his mother.

from 1 to 3 years. The baby's bladder develops, it becomes strong enough, its capacity increases by 100 ~ 130 ml. The child has the urge to urinate, he begins to realize that she needs to go to the toilet, and by the age of 2 the baby can control this process. At about 18 months of age, the developmental level of the child allows potty training to begin. However, each child is unique and each development proceeds differently, which means that the terms "potty readiness" can range from 12 to 36 months.

from 3 to 5 years. The bladder capacity is increased to 160 ~ 200ml. The baby already more clearly feels the urge to urinate, begins to independently control and, if necessary, restrain this process. This is the time of training the conditioned reflex and the final consolidation of a new skill, which means that "accidents" are quite possible along the way.
after 5 years. Up to 5 years of age, the conditioned reflex should already be formed completely, which means that "accidents" after reaching this age are associated either with infectious diseases or with the psychological distress of the child.

As for early planting, "success" in it is achieved mainly in two ways:
Mom constantly “catches moments” and puts the baby on the potty, reaching the minimum number of “wet pants” per day, but this is not an achievement of the baby, but exclusively of the mother. Therefore, we can say that the mother is accustomed to the pot, instead of the baby.

Controlled chair

The second path to “success” is achieved by grueling potty landings (“pot life”) until the child's bladder fills and reflexively empties. Can you call it a success? Unlikely. All this is very often accompanied by sentences like: "pee-pee" or "writing-writing", and "ah". The conditioned reflex undoubtedly arises, but to the words "pee-pee", "writing-writing" or "a-a", not to filling the bladder. stimulus.

Thus, the sooner you start potty training, the more effort you will spend. And the higher the level of physiological development of the child, the easier, more successful and painless this process will be.
In addition, no matter what amazing success you have achieved in teaching babies, the conditioned reflex can persist from 14 to 24 months, and in a baby who is only a year old, even the acquired reflex will be very unstable and will quickly be lost.

The physiological norms for the transition to controlled stool are:

The natural transition to bowel control begins after one year and actively matures during the second year of life.
The average age at which relatively stable skills are acquired varies between 22 and 30 months.
Persistent conditioned reflexes are formed at the age of three.

Is the child ready?

We have already learned that "exactly that time" comes after a year. But how to understand when exactly this time has come for your child, if everyone has this process is individual. To understand the development of the urinary system and the digestive system in your baby, you can try to keep a special schedule. Observe the child for several days: record the nature of the bowel movements, as well as their number and intervals between them. Here are the signs that will help you understand if the child is "ready for the potty":

the intervals between urination are 1.5 - 3 hours;
the baby walks "in a big way" regularly - 1-2 times a day;
may wake up dry after a nap and take a few minutes to run to the pot.
understands the speech addressed to him,
knows body parts and names items of clothing;
tries to imitate adults by copying their actions,
shows interest in the toilet or potty, or even wants to try, like all adults, to go to the toilet on their own;
knows and understands the words "pee" and "pookal";
shows dislike for being in dirty diapers, requires them to be removed or replaced;
trying to undress on her own;
can express (in any way) a desire to go to the potty;

Potty lessons!

The best time to acquire a new skill is summer!
Potty training should be systematic, more than once. Therefore, choose a time when you can devote yourself to your baby as much as possible.
With the development of the bladder, the baby begins to realize that he has a desire to go to the toilet and begins to give you signs. Be attentive, look closely at your baby: maybe he says one word or sound, makes a gesture or sign, squeezes the legs, takes off his pants, etc. When you notice that the baby needs to go to the toilet, try to explain to him “what's what ”And tell what should be in the pot after sitting on it.
If the baby refuses to take off the diaper, do not insist too much, let him sit in the diaper. Throw the used diaper into the pot. This will help him understand the connection between potty sitting and the desired result.
Before potty training, you need to give up diapers completely (the exception at the first stage can only be at night). It is necessary for the baby to feel the inconvenience of being in wet pants, and to understand why this is happening. Feeling discomfort from wet clothes, the child will try to communicate it with sounds or gestures. You just need to monitor her behavior.
How can a baby let know about his need to relieve himself? - He can stall, hide, strain, blush, push, he can retire in a place of his own choice, etc.

Important!!!

Place the pot in the same place, preferably in the toilet - the child should be able to reach it easily.
Wear a minimum of clothes for your baby so that you can quickly and easily remove them if necessary.
Support your baby every time he wants to use the pot for its intended purpose. Let your toddler run around naked sometimes, provided that the pot is in his field of vision. Explain to your baby that he can use it whenever he wants, and sometimes remind him of the pot if he needs it.
Don't make you sit on the potty! Especially the restless ones. If the child resists, screams, bends over, the learning process loses its meaning, the angry child will not learn anything.
Offer the pot when the likelihood of a "process" is greatest - after sleep, after eating, when the child's behavior indicates that it is time.
Encourage affectionately if everything worked out right, but don't overdo it. Don't applaud every successful attempt.
Do not start teaching your child when he is sick or naughty.
Before and after a walk, try putting your baby in a pot.
On a walk, from time to time invite your child to go to the "bushes" (if you are far from home), or to a special pot for travel; Take extra clothes with you.
Do not scold your child for "wet pants".
Concentrate the child not only on the pot itself, but also on the actions associated with it: how to get, open the pot, take off pants and panties, put them on again, how and where to pour the contents of the pot, then put it back. Perhaps, at first, the baby may try to sit on the potty and do all the "business" right in the clothes - this is nothing, this is just a stage that must be experienced. The next step may be to undress naked before sitting on the potty, and then the baby will learn to do it like an adult.

Boys should be taught to write while standing

Gradually organize potty meetings not only when the child wants to, but also when the daily schedule requires it: before and after sleep, before a walk, etc.

Notice! If the child resists and refuses to use the potty, do not force or scold her. Try to find the reason for her reluctance to sit on the pot: it can be cold, sticky, uncomfortable - too large or too small, unstable.

What nuances do you need to keep in mind?

Let's say your child has learned to use the potty, and even says that he wants to use the toilet. However, not all of the tests have been passed.

Up to 4-5 years old, some children pee in their panties. In such cases, pediatricians recommend seeking help from a neurologist.

If there is discord in your family, the child feels it, even if he doesn’t even really speak yet. The kid can stop going to the potty in stressful situations. Also, an "accident" can occur if something has changed in the child's life, for example, he was sent to a kindergarten.
Your baby may find it difficult to stay dry all night long. If he is not yet one and a half years old, you can wear a diaper for him at night. Wear panties instead of diapers from time to time. Some parents slowly put their child on the potty so that he can go to the toilet. This method has the right to life if the baby does not wake up completely after this procedure and does not start crying.
If your baby wakes up wet in the morning, don't get angry or upset. In no case should you be ashamed or offend your child, you should not make a scandal about dirty linen. The kid simply does not yet control his bladder, and does not pee to spite you out of laziness.
To increase the chances of a dry awakening, do not give your child a lot of drinks before bed. A few sips are enough. When the time comes to go to bed, be sure to put the child on the potty.

Dissenting opinion of perinatal psychologist Jeanne
For the past twenty years, many parents have been listening to the advice of a perinatal psychologist, teacher, breastfeeding consultant, mother of seven children, Zhanna Vladimirovna Tsaregradskaya. She believes that wearing diapers around the clock is harmful. It is possible and necessary to accustom your baby to cleanliness from birth!

In her works, she writes that to us, parents, it only seems that up to six months, the baby randomly pees and poops in diapers. And then she cries because of the discomfort. Zhanna Vladimirovna Tsaregradskaya advises to try to listen to the urges of the baby. To do this, you need to give up diapers, cloth diapers for a few days, allow the child to drink in one blouse. On these days, you need to spend more time with the baby in your arms, and give him the breast. It turns out that the baby defecates either during feeding or immediately after it. Many children groan, think or cry, making it clear that an accident is about to happen. Doctors advise: when a baby expresses discomfort, I quote, "turn him with his back to you, holding him under his feet, he will do his thing and calm down." Why is this happening? The doctor explains this by a primitive instinct: the baby tries not to poop and write on his mother, because enemies can find them by smell.

The next stage of cleanliness training takes two months: from six to 8 months. At this time, according to Tsaregradskaya, the child will want to do "his own business" on his own. At this age, the child prefers to defecate in private: he begins to protest against planting, at the most crucial moment he tries to retire.

From 8 months to 1 year and 3 months, the baby begins to play with the contents of the pot. By the way, at this time no one offers him this subject. Here is what Zhanna Tsaregradskaya writes: "We teach the baby to do his business with a newspaper (or a special washable rug), we clean up after the baby, but we never scold." In a maximum of three months, the author promises, children go through this stage. They are now ready to express their desire to go to the bathroom in a variety of ways.

By the time he reaches one and a half years of age, the child, according to all the rules, should begin to express a desire to go to the potty. By this age, the baby has already established a connection between the feeling of discomfort of a full bowel or bladder and subsequent discharges. It happens differently for everyone. Someone leads the mother to an adult toilet, and the baby can also demonstrate a desire to the owl with sounds: all generations of children associate this occupation with loud groaning - "A-A-A-A !!!"

After a year and a half, the baby is more and more captured by the world around him, his actions become more and more organized. Mom, of course, is needed, but gradually the child begins to perceive himself as an individual, separate from the mother. This process lasts until the baby is 2 years old. Only at this time, according to Tsaregradskaya, the child grew up to the pot. At first, this item just appears in the room. If the baby is not the only child in the house, let more experienced comrades demonstrate what to do with the pot. You can put dolls, bears, etc. on a night vase. The moment when the child sits on the potty himself will definitely come. What was required to be taught. To some, this method will seem rather dreary and long. I know for sure that it is not suitable for all children. But personally, I know a baby who, after being discharged from the hospital, “demonstrated” to her mother that she wanted to go to the toilet. As a result, a two-week-old baby would stain a maximum of one or two diapers a day. So, comrade parents, everything is very, very individual. Look for your method and, as they say, you will find.

Zhanna Vladimirovna, in her excellent manuals for successful parenting, writes that a baby in a dream just never even pees. He will surely groan, peep at least a little, start fiddling, etc. Many children just wake up and start screaming heart-rendingly: they want to go to the toilet, the teacher says. This observation of Tsaregradskaya is true: all her friends, including myself, noticed this feature. Knowing about it, and wanting your child to quickly separate from the diapers, you can start putting on ordinary cotton panties by the age of one (someone a little later) at night. Someone, at the moment of the child's anxiety, drops him out quietly over the basin, someone's baby does not resist planting on the pot. Usually children quickly accept new rules, and accidents happen very, very rarely.

One very, very simple rule for success

You must understand that at the moment when you decided to help the child become "on you" with the potty, you must first not put diapers on the baby at least for the daytime (in the summer even on the street). Firstly, this way you will find out when and how many times your baby goes to the toilet. In a few days, you will already be able to "catch" the child in a dangerous period. Secondly, the child himself learns how everything functions interestingly there. Stock up on patience and cowards, no one was able to avoid this. You are women, and you yourself know that walking in ordinary underwear is much more hygienic and, what can I say, more comfortable than in the best pads. So? So the child is better off without diapers. You gave yourself a little break from washing and ironing, but at least closer to the year you need to slowly give up disposable diapers.

Usually, mothers who are not constrained in their means put the problem of potty training on the back burner. In their children, regular diapers are replaced by diapers-panties, which, according to the manufacturers, help in the process of potty training. Companions adults: become already smart aunts and uncles and learn to distinguish competent marketing from real things. This is the same as saying from TV screens: exercise bikes will teach you to cycle faster! Many parents, after using diapers-panties, note this behavior in children: babies get used to peeing and pooping while standing, they don't even think that for this they need to at least sit down.

And in another problem, the diaper is blamed: after using disposable diapers, children simply play with the pot or around it, while they are not going to do their business in it. Psychologists are not so categorical in this case about diapers. The problem in this case is not him. It's just that after a year, the child will slowly get rid of his mother, he more and more insists on his own in the most unexpected questions, and the pot often becomes a stumbling block between a very persistent parent and child. Therefore, this purely psychological problem can be solved with time (to lag behind the child for a couple of days), or by replacing the pot.

Memo for adults

This is a big event in a child's life when he begins to use the potty consciously. The kid must control his own feelings, his body and be physically ready for this. You should not make fun of your child during this difficult period for him. This is the same as learning to walk, or eating from a spoon. This is a skill that takes practice and therefore time. If the child resists and does not want to have anything to do with the potty, listen to him. Only when the baby CAM honors him with attention, only when the CAM wants to sit on the potty without being forced, only then can you help the baby get rid of diapers once and for all.

At what age to potty train a child?

My first experience with my eldest daughter was very successful. When I was 7 months old, I started potty training my daughter. The pot was bought the most ordinary, round, gray speckled, without bells and whistles. The daughter fell in love with the pot, sat on it willingly. With varying degrees of success, I did things in a pot, then wherever it was necessary. At the age of one and a half, she went to a nursery, and there my efforts were accepted in the relay by educators who, in their efforts, advanced much further than me. After all, the educators have fallen into the old school, and they already know how to properly potty train a child! Imagine that when your child has breakfast, he is immediately sent to sit on the pot (we were forbidden to bring diapers for some reason). Now count - if your baby eats fast, then he goes to sit on the potty first, sits on it and waits for the rest of the children to pull up (this can take about half an hour). And now it is a celebration - all the children have finally sat down on the pots and sit there together for half an hour. Thus, the child who went to sit on the potty first sits on it for at least an hour. And so after each meal (breakfast, lunch, afternoon tea, dinner).

I am not kidding! No humor. This was indeed the case in our nurseries that we visited. Otherwise, the educators simply will not have time to change all the crumpled children, of whom 20-25 people have gathered in a group. To my horror, I heard stories from doctors when a child, sitting in this way on a potty, earned himself problems with the rectum (it simply fell out).

Unfortunately, I learned these scary stories much later, when my eldest daughter moved safely to the older group, which became her second home. But since then the idea of nonviolence in relation to potty training has stuck in my head. I agree in advance with those who say that this was influenced only by my negative experience, and perhaps in other, good nursery groups, this is not the case, because different conditions have been created there. But, as a rule, good conditions are the lot of private kindergartens, where there is not such a crazy number of one and a half year old children for only two teachers working in shifts.

In addition, by the time my youngest daughter was born, I became wiser and less emotional (I mean that I direct emotions now in the right direction, and I suffer less hysteria about little things). Therefore, I don't care what time my youngest daughter sits on the potty and does her business there. This does not mean that I am not doing anything. We just go with her the way that is comfortable for both of us.

Sorry to make such a wild comparison. I remember my cat, which, unexpectedly for us, began to go to the toilet to do her business. How did she come to this? Very simple. She first studied long and hard how people do it. Then, from the very first attempt, I began to do it correctly ITSELF. Moreover, she even tried to wash it off after herself. The attempt to wash it off failed due to the technical complexity of the apparatus, so the cat began to ask adults to do it, running around them and meowing.

In exactly the same way, the daughter of my friends began to go to the potty (or rather, immediately to the toilet). It happened in her incomplete two years, until that time she carefully studied the process with her mother. And then she immediately sat down on the toilet and demonstrated her "skill".

This is the path we are now going with our youngest daughter. And we already have some success. She studied the process for a long time, and once in her head some thoughts met and joined. She copied the action of an adult and, squatting down, peed on the floor, while uttering the word "pss-s-s-s". As a matter of urgency, they put in the toilet a pot given to us for our anniversary. Now the daughter is happy to sit on this pot in the form of a chair and solemnly pronounces "pss-s-s-s", however, while doing nothing in the pot. We are now a year and three months old. I think that the final stage remains, at which a few more thoughts will join in my daughter's head, and she will understand exactly where she needs to make her "pss-s-s-s".