How to tell a man about your feelings? How to get away from stereotyped behavior. If he is married

09.05.2019

Probably, it is impossible to find a person in the world who has not felt the feeling of being in love at least once. Love can flare up both after a long acquaintance, and after a chance meeting. It doesn't matter how old you are. It is not for nothing that the classic said "Love of all ages is submissive." This is a wonderful feeling that fills the heart with joy, inspires and inspires.

But, despite all the charm of the state of being in love, there is only one problem - not everyone can frankly admit their feelings. This is especially difficult for girls.

As a rule, the fair sex is waiting for the man to be the first to tell about his feelings. But sometimes men can show shyness - they are simply afraid that their feelings will be ridiculed, rejected. Consequently, it is the woman who takes the initiative. And in such a situation, many girls ask themselves the question - how beautiful is it to confess to a guy your feelings?

To speak or to be silent?

In fact, everyone, both men and women, is afraid to talk about feelings for one simple reason - there is always the possibility that these feelings are not mutual. Girls have significant doubts about whether to confess their feelings to a guy. But men are also frankly afraid of such recognition.

In fact, there is nothing wrong with recognition. The more you worry about your partner's feelings, the more likely you are to break up soon. Love is never funny - and even if your partner does not have the same strong tender feelings for you, you should not postpone recognition until later. Because "later" will be worse and more painful for her.

Therefore, to the question of whether to confess to a guy your feelings, there can be only one answer - of course, to confess. After all, it is highly likely that in response you will hear words that will make you the happiest in the world.

Time and place

If you are determined to be the first to confess your love, you need to find the right time and place for this.

For example, you can pronounce such important words during:

romantic dinner;
walks in the park;
going to the cinema;
outdoor recreation, picnic;
in bed.

The time of day itself does not matter - the main thing is to try to create a romantic secluded atmosphere (you don't need extra eyes / ears / comments).

If you have prepared a beautiful confession in a public place, for example - a restaurant, cafe, cinema, try to make sure that you are not heard. For example, in a restaurant or cafe, you can order a secluded booth in advance, and in a cinema just buy seats in the last rows.

If you are planning to be recognized at home, you can cook delicious udin and create the appropriate atmosphere. Candles can help with this perfectly - they create a mysterious and romantic twilight.

It is important to remember that when planning to confess your feelings to a guy, try to predict his mood in advance. That is, if he came to you tired after a daily shift, or angry after a meeting, it is better to postpone the confession. Perhaps a man will gladly respond to your feelings, but his own emotional and physical stress can spoil the charm and importance of the moment. So it’s better to wait.

If it's scary to look in your eyes

Situations are different - and sometimes distance can separate us with the object of love. Or, even worse, feelings flared up towards an unfamiliar person. Or it is simply scary to say words of love, looking a person in the eye.

In this case, you can confess your feelings to the guy via SMS. Modern technologies have become so firmly entrenched in our lives that many issues and disputes are resolved by means of SMS today. And if you are afraid to talk about love, looking a person in the eyes, you can write him a few warm, sincere words. The main thing is that these words come from the very heart.

Do you think SMS is too dry and far from romance? Remember that there are other ways of communicating. For example, you can always send a letter by regular mail. Of course, there is always a possibility that it will not reach the addressee. But, contrary to popular belief, this probability is rather negligible. Therefore, if you decide to write a letter, you can be sure - most likely, your chosen one will keep this message for a long time.

Where can you find the right words?

When planning to confess your feelings to a guy, the text should not be searched on the Internet. Just write or talk about how you really feel. If you can write poetry, write it. Even if you find not the best rhymes, do not despair - there will be so much love and tenderness in your words that some "lameness" of the lines will not be so noticeable.

If you absolutely do not know what to say or write, then you can use the poems and songs of famous authors. There are a huge number of them today - and you can easily find the right one. For those who are not afraid of public recognition, there is a great solution - you can simply sing a song with words of recognition while visiting a karaoke bar. Of course, you will have to accompany it with a few words - so that your partner understands that you are talking about your own feelings, and not just performing a beautiful piece.

Why me?

Girls who are already ready to confess their love are often tormented by the question - why does the guy not confess his feelings? There may be several reasons for this.

First of all, as already mentioned, banal fears that feelings will remain unanswered.

Another reason is more unpleasant - in fact, there are no feelings. But in this case, the first step on the part of the girl decides a lot - in the end, even if the guy doesn't love you, you can just break up. Yes, it is insulting and painful. But this is much better than maintaining a relationship in which "one loves and the other allows you to love."

Output

One thing is safe to say - there is no exact advice on how to properly confess your feelings to a guy. Situations are different, and people are also different. And everyone reacts differently to words about love. But it is important to understand that you cannot hide feelings in yourself. Love that is not fueled by words can fade too quickly.

As you know, girls are romantic and sensitive creatures, and therefore they begin to feel attraction to the opposite sex much earlier than the guys themselves. And at any age, it all starts with a simple sympathy, and ultimately develops into something more, important and significant. And then feelings already require an answer on his part and some certainty, but if the young man does not show signs of reciprocity, the girl has to act on her own. And then a new problem appears: for a guy, if you are afraid to hear the real answer, and how to decide on this? Let's figure this out together, dear ladies.

Question one: is all this necessary?

Declaration of love is not an easy task, it requires determination and courage, balance and responsibility. Of course, before taking this step, the girl experiences tremendous stress, fear, excitement, she is overcome by many emotions, moreover, not the most pleasant ones. However, since a guy forces you to take decisive action, think about it, should you be the first to declare your love, is all this worth such an effort on your part? Firstly, young ladies often take a slight infatuation for deep feelings, they speak loud words that they cannot live, breathe, and so on without this young man. Often they ask the pen guy. There is nothing more stupid than admitting to not knowing him personally for a long time.

First, try to test yourself: look at the other guys, be alone for a couple of days and evaluate everything soberly. Imagine that your loved one will reciprocate you, then what? Do you want a relationship with him, how long will it last? And if you really decide that your feelings are deep and not far-fetched, let's move on to the next stage: is this young man worth it.

Question two: is he the same?

You spend weeks wondering how to confess your love to a guy if you're afraid to take the first step. The heart is ready to jump out of feelings, but in the end it may turn out that it is not a berry of yours at all. Most often, a girl decides on this precisely because the guy seems to be showing signs of reciprocity, but either they are somewhat indistinct, or the lady notices that he himself wants to confess his love, but is shy. However, here, ladies, there is one small problem: we are able to invent those very "signs" for ourselves, especially if we diligently seek them out in every look of our beloved. It is quite simple to check this: disappear for a couple of days, or even a week, or play the "snow queen". Let his feelings surface and don't do anything on your own.

Drawing conclusions

If he does not even notice your absence or does not start an active search, without regretting anything, turn around and move on through life without him. You don't even have to think about how to confess your love to a guy if you are afraid, because it is clear that he is clearly not worth it, and you are just one of many for him. But if you notice that he is worried and worried, if he starts asking you what happened, what he did wrong, then act decisively, because your feelings are really mutual. Do not forget that your recognition is a treasure that is worth giving only to someone who can appreciate it.

Question three: how to do it?

If the previous questions passed the test, it's time to turn to the most important stage: how to confess your love to a guy correctly. Here everything, firstly, depends on the situation, because it makes a big difference whether you are already dating this young man, or everything can only begin after recognition. In the first option, everything is much easier, since you are already in a relationship, and you only need to guess the right moment. So, first, consider the situation. You need to choose a place for a date in which there will be a suitable romantic atmosphere, and no one will bother you. For this, a park in the evening, a quiet, cozy cafe, may be suitable. You can also invite him over for dinner. You need to create a situation so that you can talk calmly, and he was relaxed and ready for dialogue. Then you must prepare yourself, namely - come up with an attractive, but not defiant, image, gentle and romantic. It is necessary that he thinks only about you and your feelings, and a short skirt or open neckline will clearly create a different impression of you.

Question four: what to say?

If you are afraid of rejection? Think carefully about your text. The confession should not be too long and give specific information about your intentions. However, it is also not worth saying three precious words in the forehead, it can dumbfounded and frighten him. A short introductory speech, ending with a logical conclusion and, in fact, recognition, is ideal. For example, it may sound like this: “You know, we have known each other for quite a long time, and during this time I managed to understand how dear you are to me. I feel very comfortable next to you, lonely without you. You are so dear and I love you. How do you feel about me? " Of course, you must choose the speech specifically for your situation, but you need to be guided by the only rule: everything that is said must be true.

Question five: friendship or relationship?

An especially delicate situation - if you began to have feelings for a guy with whom you have long thought to be the first to confess in love in this situation? In this subtext, the most difficult question will be the choice between maintaining these relations or moving to a completely different level. Answer yourself if you are ready to risk everything and put what you have now on the line for something that may not come. After all, such a recognition in any case will undermine your friendship and his attitude towards you, and if your feelings turn out to be, then you will not be able to return everything as it was. How to declare your love if you are afraid? Think about whether you are sure that your relationship with him is romantic. It is also possible that after spending a lot of time with him, you became attached to him, and thus, it seemed to you that this is something other than friendship. And finally, think - can you be together if your feelings turn out to be mutual? Indeed, in a relationship, a guy always behaves differently than in friendship, however, like a girl. Therefore, make every decision carefully. Be happy.

For a long time you are not able to think about anything else, how about him? Friends, books, favorite hobbies, food and many other things no longer bring such joy and pleasure as some time ago? You constantly turn around in the hope of discovering it, but do you understand that these are just ghostly hopes? .. Love, as a feeling itself, is quite painful and it brings a lot of suffering. After all, few couples who quickly marry come to really something serious, that is, to strong relationships, family and marital happiness.

If you really love a guy, then maximalism is probably in full swing in you. As a rule, the female sex is the most vulnerable to such feelings. They suffer, suffer and worry that nothing can be done about it. They are always looking for answers to questions: how to confess love to your chosen one, how to confess your feelings to a guy? Is it worth doing? Will he be able to reciprocate?

Girls who really fell in love with their hearts and souls, who have real feelings for a guy, do not need to despair! You just need to calm down and understand the situation.

If your heart just breaks out of your chest, beats with terrible force at the sight of that very guy who excites your thoughts and your mind, then there are only two options for recognizing him in your feelings. Most often it depends on whether they are mutual or not.

The first option means that the guy responds with at least sympathy to your expression of feelings. For example, you are spending time together, and he is trying in every possible way to show his sympathy for you. In this case, when you begin to understand that you will no longer be able to keep your feelings and emotions in yourself, then you can directly, boldly say to him so cherished and sacred - “I love”. There is a fairly high probability that you will hear a reciprocal answer. But, in no case should you be upset if you have not received the desired answer. It is possible that your chosen one is simply dumbfounded or confused. Naturally, it can also happen that the relationship will deteriorate because of this for a long time.

Option two assumes that your beloved does not even know that you are burning with love for him. He lives an ordinary life and simply does not notice you. Unfortunately, these situations are quite common. In this situation, in no case should you shout about your feelings. You first need to somehow get closer to your chosen one, make friends, find common points of contact - interests. Believe me, if he doesn't want to do this, then write here - it's gone. You do not need to think at this moment that your life is over and nothing "shines" for you - believe me, life is multifaceted, and it involves many interesting moments and turns of events. I assure you that after this guy you will still meet exactly the one who will truly appreciate your feelings and will respond with the much-expected reciprocity. The time will come, and you will remember this with a smile.

I must say that in any case, if you seriously have a desire to confess your feelings to a guy, then you need to follow some tips:

For the moment of recognition, you need to choose the most appropriate time when no one will be around and nothing will be able to distract you;
It is necessary to create the most romantic atmosphere that is conducive to "love" feelings.
In no case should you give expensive gifts, because this will oblige the guy more, and he will not be able to reciprocate.
And the most important advice - do not be afraid of anything, do not hesitate, because only the one who does nothing to achieve his goal is not mistaken.

In any case, it is worth knowing and understanding so that it does not happen - you will receive such a valuable life experience.

The days of the knights are far behind, and today women increasingly prefer to conquer men on their own. It's good if your chosen one can be confidently called an adherent of old traditions, but what to do if the representative of the opposite sex you like is (yet!) Unavailable? It is possible that in this case you decide to tell him about your feelings. But how to do it correctly? A frank declaration of love can scare a man away, and therefore, women's magazine Charla invites you to develop a strategy that is likely to help you find happiness in your personal life. So what to do and what not to do if you want to confess your love to a man? Let's figure it out right now!

Why is he silent?

First, let's talk about why we often have to wait declarations of love from men for years. Believe it or not, they, just like women, may be ashamed to talk about their feelings. Many people were taught from childhood that a real man is always stingy with emotions, while someone is simply scared to hear "No" from a woman they like. So, shyness is the first reason that a man cannot make a declaration of love.

The second reason is the man’s confidence that you already know perfectly well about his feelings. “I give a woman flowers / sweets / fur coats, go to the theater with her, spend my holidays - this already shows that I love her. Why say anything else? " - believe me, so many men reason. If women often put feelings first, then representatives of the strong half of humanity are more rational and prefer to prove their heartfelt affection not in word, but in deed. But even from them it is more than real to extract a declaration of love ...

How to declare your love correctly?

If you decide to take the initiative into your own hands, remember that a declaration of love should not be too explicit - you can hint to a man about your feelings. It is interesting that later he will think that he was the first to talk about his feelings, while the initiative still came from you. But this is the lyrics, and now let's talk about the main thing. So, a declaration of love can be done as follows:

1. Caught by surprise

Just say what you have known about his feelings for a long time, and you are ready to hear a declaration of love right now. On the one hand, you demonstrate that your feelings are mutual, on the other hand, you show that the man still needs to win you over (in this case, with the help of a beautiful declaration of love).

2. Make romantic hints

Put heart-shaped chocolates in the pocket of his jacket, say that only with him you feel the happiest. It will not be difficult for a man to guess that you need him. The only advice is not to overdo it. For example, many women decide to make a declaration of love by presenting their chosen one with a framed photo - this can scare a man off.

3. Become a part of his life

Cook his favorite dishes, meet him from the airport when he returns from a business trip, sew up all the torn off buttons on his shirts, play computer games with him - in general, do everything to show the man how dear he is to you. Charla Women's Site I have already said that representatives of the stronger sex value actions more than words, and therefore, try to prove your feelings, and not just show them.

Where to declare your love?

In what environment will a man accept a declaration of love best? In fact, there are many ways to talk about your feelings. Here is an approximate list of places that are suitable for these purposes:

1. Cinema - a declaration of love will end the evening perfectly if you sit on the last row with a man and watch a romantic movie.

2. Party - When both of you have fun and are distracted from everyday problems, you can talk about your feelings. When a man is in a good mood, the chances that he (if there is sympathy on his part) will reciprocate you are maximized.

3. Shop or stop - sometimes a declaration of love is not very romantic, but no less memorable. For example, while standing in line for bread or waiting for the bus, you can simply say: "Anyway, I want to say that I love you very much." Unexpectedly and boldly - a man will be pleased to hear it.

4. Bed - your closeness is already a great excuse to declarations of love, and therefore, use this opportunity to say about your feelings simply, without florid phrases.

5. Apartment - leave a declaration of love on the fridge. It can be a paper heart or a regular sticker on which a beautiful poem is written. Another option is to have a romantic evening with a candlelit dinner. However, keep in mind that many men can be scared off.

You can also tell a man about your feelings in a restaurant, gym, theater, park and even a registry office!

The mistakes of women who talk about their feelings

And finally, don't be afraid to hear "No", because we can't please everyone. Let it be unlucky today, but you managed to overcome yourself, talk about your feelings and understand that your happiness is yet to come. Well, if a man reciprocated your recognition, it means that you can only be glad for you. Don't be afraid to love and talk about love! Be happy!

Marina Nikitina

The modern woman is active,. Men and women have the same rights, so a woman is not prohibited from declaring her love first. But the fair sex still dream of hearing a declaration of love from a beloved man before they themselves confess their feelings.

It is very difficult to say about love, but it is even more difficult to wait for recognition and doubt. Why are guys in no hurry to reveal their souls to a girl? How can a girl tell her lover about her feelings so as not to scare him and not be rejected?

When and why girls confess their love

If a girl has waited for a declaration of love, it is easy and pleasant for her to talk about feelings. Knowing for sure that she is loved, the girl confesses her love with sincere joy and a feeling of happiness.

When feelings overwhelm their souls, it is difficult to hide them, they ask to go out, words of love break from the lips of their own accord. Confessing love to a loved one is a need and a burning desire. How best to satisfy her depends on the love story the woman is experiencing.

A girl declares her love when:

Wants to hear the answer "yes" or "no". When a girl loves a man, she wants to express her feelings and hopes to hear a positive response. And even "no" is better for her than the unknown. This happens if a girl has no love relationship with her beloved man; she loves or thinks she loves unrequitedly; a man is too timid to admit his feelings first.
Wants to hear "yes." The girl thinks that she is loved, but doubts it, wants to get a specific answer from her beloved. This happens when a guy and a girl have been dating for a long time or have been friends, but no recognition and proposals from the man come. A man can express love in different ways, show it in actions, demonstrate in behavior, but not talk about it directly.

A girl decides to confess her love to a man because she wants certainty.

The guy does not confess his love or leaves the answer when:

timid, shy, notorious;
is afraid to push away, frighten the girl with recognition;
afraid to hear "no" in response;
convinced that the girl must first confess;
morally not ready to confess;
doubts that he loves or needs to confess;
does not love;
believes that a girl should already see love in her actions and actions.

In any case, the girl needs to be told about sincere and strong feelings, whatever the reason for the man's silence.

Telling your loved one about your feelings, you can get four possible answers:

yes, "I love you too",
no, "I don't love you"
neither yes nor no; indefinite answer, when it remains unclear whether a man loves or not,
silence; when a guy leaves a girl unanswered, laughs it off or translates the topic.

It is good when a guy answers "yes" or "no" sincerely and directly, it is worse when the answer is unclear, untrue, or simply not there.

The older a woman is, the less she is ready to wait a long time for a decisive step and recognition from a man, so she is more likely to be recognized first.

A popular proverb says: "It is better to do and regret than not to do and regret." Maybe it's better to confess your love to a man than to be silent and tormented by doubts? Moreover, if it is already impossible to restrain feelings in oneself!

How to confess your love with words

You can confess your love by chance, in a fit of feelings. If a girl excludes such an opportunity for herself, one should sensibly prepare for recognition.

How to declare your love in the best way, so that it is at the right time and place?

Make up your mind. First of all, you need to honestly answer the question: “Do I really love? Will the confession be sincere? " Sometimes a girl uses blackmail for her own selfish purposes. Do not play with feelings and words. You need to confess your love simply because you love and want to say about it.

Guess the answer. In order not to be afraid to utter words of love, one must assume the possible response of a loved one. If he answers "yes", the girl will be happy, if "no" - she will also be happy, but with another man who will love her. If the answer is inaccurate or ambiguous, she will decide to continue the relationship / communication or not.
Think about how to pronounce a confession. Love includes wholeness and experiences: sadness, joy, fear, passion, anxiety, happiness, and so on. What emotion will be heard in the confession? Words are less important than how they are spoken. Voice volume, tempo, intonation will speak for themselves. The phrase "I love you" can be pronounced both with a smile and joy, and with tears in your eyes and deep sadness.
Find a place and time. - an intimate moment. It is better to confess your love one-on-one, in a calm atmosphere, when no one is in a hurry. In the hustle and bustle, noise, surrounded by people, this should not be done. If a man does not hear the words, does not have the opportunity to answer, or unexpectedly someone interrupts the conversation, the declaration of love will turn into a farce.
Words of love. You can tell a person for a long time about how dear he is, how important and irreplaceable he is, but you can only make it clear that you love by saying “I love”. Words are better than "I love you!" people haven't figured it out yet.

It is difficult to say about love, you can get agitated, frightened, speechless and self-control. Preparing for a confession will help you avoid such incidents.

Ways to confess your love without words

In addition to the fact that you can pronounce words of love, there are others:

Write. A note, letter, postcard, SMS and other ways to transfer feelings to media. The words of recognition can be made into a poem, song, drawing, sent by an audio and video file. There is a lot of room for creativity, any creative idea will help to confess your love in an interesting way.
Express in action. How to declare your love without saying or writing a word? Do something that only loving people do for each other. Love is expressed in disinterested care, help, support, respect, acceptance of a person as he is. For example, visit a loved one when he is sick, bring him medicine and fruit.
Hint. If a girl does not know how to confess her love to a guy and no way to express feelings directly helps, you can hint. Not all men take hints. Therefore, it is better to make them expressive, unambiguous. For example, make a heart-shaped dessert especially for him.
Non-verbal ways to express love: smile, look, touch, kiss. Flirting and coquetry without words tell a man that a woman is in love with him. When a woman looks at a man with a smile, with a twinkle in her eyes, she wants to be closer in the literal and figurative sense, this can be seen in her behavior. There is no need to be ashamed and inhibited to behave in the presence of a loved one.

You can confess your love by combining several well-known methods or come up with something completely new.

It is important to confess your love to your beloved sincerely, with an open heart and soul. This is a brave act that, in any case, will change life for the better.

March 23, 2014 3:38 pm