Where to meet a girl after 30 years. Where to meet a girl for a serious relationship? About light bulbs: Thomas Edison's secret to success

30.09.2019

Over the past hundred years, the world has changed beyond recognition: and the matter is not only in technical progress, but also in the psychology of mankind as a whole. Traditions, concepts and foundations have been transformed, and, if more recently, a girl who is already 30 years old easily enrolled in the ranks of “old maids”, today many women deliberately put off marriage on the back burner.

Study, career, travel and life for pleasure came to the fore, and the husband, children and pots can wait a bit. Being single at this age is not at all a shame, but after 30, the vast majority of women are already beginning to be puzzled by the problem of their personal lives.

What prevents you from finding a soul mate at this age?

Interestingly, some 100 years ago, 20-year-old girls in Russia were called sour brides, and 100 years ago, the vast majority of young ladies tried to get married at the age of 15-17.

Today, the situation has changed radically, and no one comes up with offensive nicknames for such girls. Life expectancy has increased significantly, and, at the same time, the institution of the family has begun to change.

If earlier the main goal of a woman was the birth of a child (and preferably several) and a home, today ladies, first of all, get an education and try to provide themselves with a successful career. Marriage is postponed until later, but why is it so much harder to find a soul mate with this “later”?

The circle of communication narrows. If while studying at the institute and even the first years after it, meetings, walks, parties and acquaintances are quite frequent in the life of young people, then at an older age the way of life changes. How to meet an interesting person if after 30 years your life route is fixated on: home-work, occasionally a store or meeting an old friend who is also, most likely, already married for a long time?
Serious competition. Needless to say, a person at the age of 30 or more is an already formed and established personality, who already has certain attitudes regarding a possible second half. If at an early age, we mainly look at the appearance and a certain “chemistry” of organisms, then at an older age there are much more such criteria: social status, appearance, worldview, attitude towards children and family are important, and so on. All this greatly narrows the circle of possible candidates, and we, without noticing it, quickly push away any possible options.
Force of habit. On the one hand, you feel that there is a desire to acquire a soul mate, but, on the other hand, you don’t really want to change your established habits. Adapting to someone, finding compromises and giving in is easier at a young age, but the older we get, the harder it is to sacrifice something. By the way, women in this regard are a little easier, while men get so used to a lonely lifestyle that it is almost impossible to withdraw them from the ranks of bachelors.
No sooner said than done. Unfortunately, situations are not uncommon in which a single woman literally gives herself an attitude: I must find a husband for myself! And, as soon as this happens, all possible options evaporate somewhere. Experts say that even the look of such women changes, signaling to men “I want a serious relationship.” But those, by their very nature, are hunters, and they simply give up from such assertiveness, preferring to look for "their catch in another lake."

How to find your love after 30 years?

Firstly, it is very important to change your worldview: do not purposefully try to find someone, let go of the situation and, before you notice, your soul mate will find you.

In addition, work on your self-esteem - it’s not uncommon for a woman who has reached the number “30” to begin to “draw” a fat cross on her personal life, they say, since she couldn’t cope with the search for a half at a young age, now there’s really no point no. A complex grows in my head - “I’m somehow not like that”, in other words, “with a defect”. And this is a big nonsense!

Only that woman who knows how to love and appreciate herself can please someone else, and even more so, the opposite sex. Learn to be proud of yourself and your own life achievements - success in a career, in a hobby, or in other areas of life. Learn to accept compliments for your achievements, and also not be shy to talk about them - let everyone know how great you are!

In addition, you still have to work on your own list of preferences, according to which you try to choose a man. At a minimum, throw away half of it, the main thing that should remain in it is the feeling of spiritual comfort that occurs when you are next to it.

Remember that a high social status or an incredibly broad outlook of the other half are not always the most important criteria that can make your future life truly happy.

Try to change your daily itineraries by adding a few points where it's easy to meet new people. For example, choose a cafe near your home and make it a habit to go there at least once a week for a cup of coffee or tea.

And you need to come not with a crowd of friends, namely alone. Enjoy your favorite drink, you can read a couple of pages of your favorite book or take some notes in a notebook. The fact is that such places also have their own regulars, who are often willing to get acquainted with those who regularly visit their favorite places.

Do not forget about the power of the Internet and social networks - here, oddly enough, you can also find nice and serious people who, just like you, are in search of their soul mate. There are even special dating sites and the so-called "electronic matchmakers" that are engaged in bringing people together.

It is better to choose paid portals with a good reputation - there are much more chances to meet the maximum decent person with serious plans for the future.

If you still don’t like the Internet, then you can get acquainted in the old fashioned way: in theaters, cinemas, at exhibitions, in a gym or in a park, but for this to happen, you need to get out to such places as often as possible! Do not be afraid to go on dates - only in person you will be able to understand whether this person is yours and whether it is worth changing something in your life for him.

At the same time, do not forget to take care of yourself - only harmonious, deep and developed personalities are able to attract the attention of the opposite sex, well-groomed appearance - also no one has canceled, for the success of your business, you must be at the peak of your attractiveness!

And remember, the age after 30 is not a sentence at all, rather, this is a great time when you are already wise and experienced, provided with work and even, possibly, housing, while still boasting a flourishing appearance and well-groomed appearance. And therefore - all the cards are only in your hands!

It is very quiet in the student cafe in the morning. And who needs to make noise, everyone is on vacation ...
I drink coffee, read the news, look out the window.
The long-awaited coolness has come, yesterday it was raining and even the storm was joking a little...

Two girls came, sat across the table from me, sharing their impressions of the holiday.
It was evident that the holiday was a success.
Word by word and the conversation moved on to the topic of men, families and children.
One told how great the kids had a rest, how much they ate and what they preferred. The other sat silent.
Was seen. that the crown is not very relevant to her.
- Oh, Marina, it's time for you to get married. It's time to have kids. You just need to find a good groom.
- So where do you find him? You yourself know perfectly well that good males are still taken apart as puppies.

picture from the internet

- Well, you need to get acquainted somewhere. I don't even know where. Can you look after someone among your husband's acquaintances? How are you?
- Yes, I do not mind ... Autumn is coming soon, and there the holidays will follow one after another. And I don’t really want to go to a company where everyone is already gathering with their families. I feel very uncomfortable under the gaze of my friends who are afraid for their husbands, or when one of the girls says: "Invite Marinka to dance, otherwise she is completely bored." One gets the impression that a clown will now come running and will entertain me ...

And where can you meet a man if you are a little over 30?
- Yes, the devil knows? I have no luck with this case. Previously, girlfriends invited someone to visit, but everything was not right. And why not? I never wanted to get married. I thought that at the age of 35 I would give birth to a child and I would live normally. But now I understand that the child needs a father, and not the worst to be. Sometimes they meet on the street. Almost a pensioner will come up and begin to weigh out flat jokes, sparkling eyes. He thinks he's the smartest...
A couple of weeks ago, an ichthyander in a blue beret clung, I helped him get out of the fountain. It seems pleasant in appearance, a merry fellow, he said that he was bewitched. You could try to disenchant. Maybe he would have made a good man and husband. But I have no desire to disenchant someone who is friends with a glass. Last fall and winter, I was very hysterical about being alone. You have no idea how the holidays are oppressed and tormented. There, families prepare for the New Year, then for Christmas. It is morally difficult for St. Valentine's Day and March 8th. And I understand everything, but my soul hurts ... And then I realized that everything is fine and calm, and I feel good alone.

Oh, mother, how everything is running! As soon as you start to say "it's good for me and one", you should immediately think about an intensive search. Have you tried to find someone with whom you will be even better? Stop putting your ear to the ground, waiting to hear the clatter of the hooves of that same white horse. You see what time it is. Many princes went gay, and their horses were taken apart along the way. Here we must act, not wait.

I myself know that I need to act, but how?
- Well, take fate by the hand and start getting to know yourself. Tell me, where was the last time you saw a decent man? Well, one that looks both pleasant and decent... At work, on the way home. Right. They meet. There are, of course, the lords of wedding rings, but there are not a few unmarried ones. You just have to notice them. And how many different kinds of tricks have been invented to draw the attention of a man, which is difficult to convey. Do you think Max found me, charmed me, courted and persuaded me? Stop! This is what I found myself. Yes, I met him myself. And, oh God, what a horror! I invited him to marry me.

Never would have thought.
- You don't have to think. We must act! So, act, Manya, yourself, and do not hope for a miracle! And next year you can go on vacation with your loved one, and not with an annoying girlfriend.

It's sad, but true: it's not so easy to meet a man if your route is work-home-work. What about those who dream of a family and do not know where to meet their future husband? Of course, you can just sit at home and meet your fate. But we conducted a survey in a popular women's community and found out where determined women over 30 met their soulmate.

So here are the top 10 options:

Dating sites (or apps like Tinder)

Yes, we were not mistaken. The main thing is to take the issue seriously. Let a thousand men write to you, and 999 of them are completely unsuitable for you, what if one of them is your destiny? The main thing is to remember the rules of Internet security: do not give out your home address, credit card number, do not give passport data and do not appoint the first one at an abandoned construction site on a dark night. “I went on dates like a job for two whole months, until I met HIM,” Marina M. shares. You should also look at the subject of the portal. The site "Speed dating without obligations for the uninhibited" is not your option if you dream of a friendly large family.

social dances

Don't fall for the "real men don't dance" provocations. Creative people love music! If this is about you, then look for a person who shares your interests. Hustle, salsa, Argentine tango - a great opportunity not only to find a new hobby, improve your physical shape, but also arrange your destiny.

Interest Forums

Forums, of course, do not imply a dating format. But if you know everything about houseplants, the movie Star Trek, or can assemble and disassemble a car better than any mechanic, don't be afraid to connect with like-minded people. Maybe it was in the topic “how to water an orchid?” Will your future husband answer you?

Places where men gather

Just don't laugh. In a shooting gallery, at a robotics exhibition or in a billiards club, most likely there are a lot of men. If your goal is to create a family, do not waste your free evening showing women's toilets. Most likely, only women will come there. A casual phrase will help start an acquaintance, but before you say it, you need to find WHERE it will be heard.

Second degree

You will not believe it, but the university turned out to be a popular meeting place for people after 30. The student years are over, but the company of classmates can be found both in advanced training courses and in an English school. Either way, you'll have a good time! If you don't find a husband, learn Chinese. It is not known which is better.

Social network

“I looked around to see if he liked what I liked” - sometimes a great opportunity to make an acquaintance. Going back to option 3, look at the topic groups. A profile in social networks can give a preliminary idea of a person. If he is not in the "pickup for beginners" group, "I'm a gigolo and I'm proud of it", but his priorities are "family and children", maybe this is the one you were looking for?

Mutual friends

Feel free to ask your friends! Maybe your best friend's second cousin is single. Or does a colleague have an acquaintance who has no one to go to a new musical with? It is not at all necessary to grab a former classmate at a reunion by the lapels of his jacket and pester with the question “Your friend is not married? I'm looking for a husband!". But asking a loved one to help you find a company to go to the cinema or theater is not ashamed and not scary at all! The main thing is to decide.

old friends

That guy who always sat on the last desk, copied your math and swayed in a chair, could turn into an interesting man. Do not dismiss old acquaintances - "yes, it's just Vasya!". See old friends in a new way. And do not be lazy to go to the reunion of graduates. Many of them will pleasantly surprise you.

Work

If your firm doesn't impose strict sanctions on those who decide to have coffee together, invite a likeable colleague to discuss a new movie. Or a new album from your favorite band. Anything but a job (so he doesn't think you have a symposium). Many are not ready to work with their husbands on the same team. But problems can be solved as they come, and one date does not oblige you to immediately put a letter of resignation on the director's desk. Especially if you invite the director himself.

Okay, if you don't feel like it at all, don't leave the house. As Brodsky wrote, there is nothing more interesting in the world than a wall and a chair. And you are not at all obliged to dance, shoot at a shooting range, register on the forum if you are not interested! One of the lucky brides from that sorority married a man who called his mother and just got the wrong number. Nobody canceled a small miracle?

Most importantly - do not forget that you are beautiful, amazing, interesting to others and to yourself, no matter how soon one of these methods works. And it will definitely work!

It's logical to look for a life partner where he himself goes in search of a girlfriend. Therefore, we instructed the writer Oleg Borichev to investigate where and how gentlemen of different age groups meet their potential ladies. And the journalist Anna Rodina supplemented his large-scale work by summarizing our women's experience.

Where to meet at 20+

“Listen, I don’t understand what you want from me at all!” - Vanya hooks a mushroom on a fork from the fifth time; catching hairy youngsters is much faster for him.

- Nothing outrageous! How do you meet girls? Where? Why exactly?

- Yes, it doesn't matter. I'm interested - I'm taking a step. On the street, in a bar, at a party, at a corporate party - it doesn't matter. He approached, spoke, yes - yes, no - no, that's all.

Vanya is tall, handsome, usually talkative. He graduated from the theater, played episodic roles in a dozen TV shows. He is 23. At the moment he is single and claims that he meets not only for the sake of sex. Trying to start a conversation about ways to find a match with his age group seems logical (for a while). At twenty-something, the entire vast ancient world lies at our feet like an obedient dog. The future seems exceptionally bright, parents are hopeless retrogrades, and love is eternal. Even the results of polls do not argue with the latter. According to the Romir research holding, almost all respondents agree on the age of 23-25 when choosing the age to start a family (and agreed 10 years ago).

The main thing that surprises Ivan and his peers is, of course, not an explicable frivolous attitude to the subject of conversation as a whole, but a wary perception of the Internet as a way of getting to know each other. "I'm not that desperate", "Too much culling rate", and even just "Pfffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffsssssssssssssssssssssssshard. Various measurements show from 50 to 65% of the penetration of the global network into the lives of Russians. That is, every second person is already connected, but the level of male distrust in the Internet in matters of arranging life, oddly enough, is the same.

We think. In 1897, an all-Russian census was conducted, and it turned out that girls mostly go down the aisle at 21. A hundred years later, in the dashing nineties, they jumped out to get married even earlier - at the age of 18-19. It is believed that social upheavals are to blame, which forced us to seek stability by any means.

Modern research shows that shocks are probably a thing of the past. Many girls do not think about marriage until the age of 25–27 (then the question: “Well, why are you still not married?” - still a little annoying). In the meantime - bars, parties, the Internet. Youth wants diversity, and where to look for it, if not on a dating site or, for example, in a special mobile application, right?

Actually. The Internet as a hunting ground is of least interest to windy twenty-year-olds. The irony is that the girls were not so windy after all. Serve them serious relationships or good friends, not this dinner of yours with dancing. “We have 16.5 million registered users, about 37% of them are women,” says Maxim Khramov, director of dating site LovePlanet. “So, young girls in the column “Purpose of dating” most often indicate friendship and communication.” “I like the Russian Tinder, there are a lot of beauties,” 23-year-old Italian Mario echoes him. “But most of them are determined to find a permanent partner.”

“Tinder”, of course, is not at all for this, and even young ladies complain that everything is too slow in dating applications: men often do not go beyond likes, it takes a long time to wait for an invitation to a date, and when you are twenty, you don’t want to wait. “I appreciated my photo - and that was the end of the conversation,” says Katya, she is 22. – I think it's easier to go to a bar and meet someone there. In any case, it will immediately be clear whether a person likes it or not.

Where to meet at 30+

“It’s just that at some point you need to understand that all this is really serious. Need time. And strength. and organization of the process. I'm not saying that you need to drive dates into the Outlook calendar. Although-ah-ah ... - Seva looks thoughtfully out the window, where it is dark and scary, like in the soul of a man who first visited a dating site in 2016.

- That is, still drive?

- Well no. Be serious about this. Either you want to die alone or you don't. If not, work. Not at all, but over it. Well, in general, too ...

Seve is thirty. The easiest way to describe him is with established clichés: “successful manager”, “well-groomed beard”, “creakle”. Seva is very angry at his ex-wife for cheating and a little angry at the whole world, because "what the hell is wrong." He lived according to a plan that was roughly outlined back in his senior years, and the world and the former dared to somewhat correct the established picture of a folding life.

The time of the collapse of youthful dreams of simplicity, convenience and directness of the chosen path comes as a result for almost any seva. It is assumed that a thirty-year-old man is an adult of our species, an accomplished person, a stable social construct. Oh, if only. The total infantilization of homo sapiens males has led to the fact that by thirty, we often only just understand what we need from a partner. And sometimes it comes as a surprise. How about dating? He suddenly turns out to be not just unimportant, but stupidly uninteresting - yes, any, damn it. "Damn knows what she's good for, but I don't regret getting married." “Yes, I immediately realized that I didn’t, but I ran away from the cinema ...” “Listen, I’m just tired, but with her ... well, it just happened.”

We think. Agree, by thirty there is no time for bars and round-the-clock parties, and, to be honest, no energy. But most of the girls already have a permanent job. And here you can meet the man of your dreams. And blush, slightly touching the sleeves during the next coffee break.

Actually. It’s just that a thirty-year-old young lady, most likely, will no longer go to a bar to dance. And here a woman can even get out into a thematic institution. “From about the age of 29, the representatives of the weaker sex most often indicate marriage as the purpose of dating,” says Maxim Khramov, director of the LovePlanet website. “And it is worth noting, by the way, that regardless of age, sex as the main motive is the least popular among ladies.” Girls, among other things, need a like-minded person. Not necessarily immediately a spouse, but one with whom it will be possible to look in the same direction.

“I like football, so I go to sports bars when there are interesting matches,” says 30-year-old Marina. - At first, the guys, of course, assume that I just like to stare at how beautiful men run around the field. But then it turns out that I really understand football, and there are a lot of topics for conversation. “I often met at lectures,” 37-year-old Selena shares her experience. And we did not even take into account the magic of intellectual fluids. It turns out that at a lecture on modern architecture or a design workshop, you can easily meet someone nice with a suitable IQ.

“It’s easier to get acquainted on the Internet,” 30-year-old Masha unexpectedly enters, “you can talk longer and understand whether you’re crazy or not. A simple example: a friend met a man in "real life" - interesting, handsome. And then she found him on VKontakte - with the nickname Pussy Style. The image, as you understand, is very dimmed. well But what about office romances? "I heard that miracles happen, - says Olya, she is 33. - But, let's say, my colleagues. One is tipsy every evening, the second at the first opportunity pours mud on the former, the third is not able to make a single independent decision. Would I like to hook up with one of them? The answer is coming."

Where to meet at 35+

- Seriously? Don't have Tinder? - Kostya drops a dumpling from a spoon and looks at me literally with his mouth open.

Kostya is almost forty, he is a doctor in not the latest paid clinic. And if he has a strict professional taboo on caring for patients, then otherwise he is one of the most popular with the opposite sex of my acquaintances. Which, however, does not bring him joy. By the end of the fourth decade, the life of many of us becomes like an apartment after an apocalyptic party: everything is broken around, dreams and former partners are scattered in the corners, and the only thing we really want is to lie down on the sofa and die quickly. But. The sexual instinct is invincible. “Oleg, I know that she will leave me in six months, but you understand…”

Tinder, a popular mobile dating app, aims to make the journey from sparking interest to face-to-face meeting as easy as possible. According to various data, from 12 to 41% of all smartphone users have tried it. Until recently, when I said that I was unfamiliar with Tinder, they looked at me with bewilderment. However, the situation has changed: marriage swindlers and lovers of easy removal cleverly won the application. But in fact, the way you meet is really not that important. Most of the people I interviewed who were dissatisfied with Tinder ended up finding partners through other channels. How and why? “Oleg, do you really need to decipher this? ..”

We think. Adult women are wise and careful. They must have already burned themselves in milk, that is, in their first or even second marriage. So now the ladies will not head off to get acquainted on the Internet, a drinking establishment or at a resort. The best option is an established company of friends, where during regular gatherings, someone nice and without a ring on the nameless one suddenly comes out from behind the curtain.

Actually. The surveyed women aged 35+ rejected such a dull scenario for arranging their personal lives (not categorically - with the reservation “what if ...”, but still). And many have called the most attractive way of dating - drum roll! - an accidental meeting during the holidays. When you have already boarded the plane and the wine in the glass has not yet warmed up, and the problems have already been forgotten, then you can start shooting with your eyes. “Two of my friends met the grooms on vacation,” says 42-year-old Tatyana. – Serbia, Italy. Holiday romances are written off in vain: there is more time, nothing distracts from each other, and trips to the hypermarket on Saturdays do not yet loom on the horizon.

Apparently, this is a trend: women (like men, presumably), getting older, less and less want to delve into the spreading inner worlds of partners. And they can be understood: there is a crisis around, then the euro, then sanctions - how to deal with all this. Difficult relationships ladies do not welcome, give them lightness. “In the third message, a man from the Badoo website complained that he was divorced, misses his daughter a lot and nothing pleases him. Well, why should I know this? asks 40-year-old Galina. “Go to the dance,” encourages Yulia, who is also 40. “For only six months I have been learning to dance the Argentine tango, and the romantic results are as follows: one unsuccessful romance (sometimes), one loyal fan (nice) and one pecking mutual interest (I bet on this horse). A friend goes to a salsa school and claims that the energetic Latina is also respected by free and relationship-minded men of all ages.

In preparing this text, I collected information on several dozen magazine pages. It is impossible to squeeze it down to one article. I thought the whole world had moved to the Net, no. People still get to know each other on the streets, in the cinema, at exhibitions and at a party. It seemed to me that the mobile Internet has replaced all communication channels - no. According to the Pew Research Center, up to 54% of citizens still expect calls from partners, not messages. It seemed that after thirty-five there really was no life - nonsense, it was just beginning. The world had to change. And he probably has changed, but we are still looking for each other and even, surprisingly, love.

Opportunities are getting bigger. Difficulties too. We have no time, we are afraid, we appreciate feigned misanthropy, we are constantly at work. We hide behind websites, apps and alcohol. We are indistinguishable from the landscape, virtual identities and fictional characters. Only we still want to be with someone who will understand us, approve us and help us survive all this jazz. And by and large, only this thought makes many of us not give up. Even if you have to approach an unfamiliar woman in a bar. Or write to her. Or, I don't know, like at least.

We admit that the male view of the problem does not shine with optimism. Women perform more vigorously and more actively. But we agree on the main thing: there is a chance to find that very person, and this is already half the battle.

We are waiting for your reaction. What do you think about what you read? Share your thoughts in the comments below or write to [email protected]

The process of dating and finding a romantic partner never goes smoothly. For the sake of a long-term relationship, many people are willing to wait for years, they make high demands on their soulmate and try to make a good first impression. If you play this game correctly, happiness and a cloudless life await you ahead. But if you make a mistake and choose the wrong person, you will have to start all over again. Acquaintance of a man and a woman these days is akin to a lottery. And the older you get, the harder it is to read a new chapter in your life. Today we will talk about how people who have crossed the 30-year milestone get to know each other.

You have fewer opportunities

In our country, the average age for marriage is 25 years for women and 27.4 years for men. As you understand, if a person enters the marriage market already after 30 years, with a greater degree of probability the best “offers” have already been sorted out. Most friends and potential partners at this point in time are already in a relationship. This means a marked decrease in the number of potential candidates.
That is why more and more people prefer to look for applicants not around themselves, but through specialized sites. Thus, you can somehow expand the search range. If you've waited too long for your chance or have a history of failed relationships, the realization that "the train has left" can hurt. Most young people by the age of 30 already have a family and a child (or even several). And your girlfriends are unlikely to support your desire for a cocktail on Tuesday evening. They are also bound by family obligations.

Various purposes

According to experts, many women after 30 perceive dating as a “last chance”. That is why they are more interested in commitment. They set specific deadlines from the time they met to the start of a life together. For example, a partner is given 9 months to move in and 18 months to get engaged. If after this time the relationship has not progressed to its logical conclusion, the couple breaks up at the initiative of the woman. She does not want to waste her time in vain, because each subsequent year takes away her chances of meeting her future husband. But in fact, this approach to relationships is fundamentally wrong. Experts warn their "age" clients against putting forward any conditions to a romantic partner.

How do priorities change?

After the age of 30, most people have an education and a stable job. If at 25 women are divided into careerists and those who dream of finding their happiness at the hearth, then after 30 the priorities of beautiful ladies change. Those who think about procreation understand that nature has measured too little time for reproductive functions. Biological realities are such that before the age of 40, a woman needs to find a life partner and give birth to children.

How does consciousness change?

After 30 years, the consciousness of a woman also changes. Now she is no longer the beauty that is ready to spend evenings in a bar and is open to adventure. Changes in consciousness are the main cause of differences in the behavior of 20-year-old and 30-year-old young ladies. All experiments (including with their sexuality) have already been made. Now the woman is surprised to find that she is beginning to seek stability. She is no longer interested in games, she is less prone to impulsive desires.

Possible age difference with partner

As we said, there are too few worthy bachelors in the 30-year-old market. That is why a woman who has decided to find stability in life, for the most part, is deprived of communication with her peers. That is why among couples where one of the partners enters the time of maturity, there is often a difference in age. No one is surprised that so many modern business women are older than their husbands.

Do you know what you want from a relationship?

The very communication between partners is complicated by their stable beliefs and habits. If 20-year-old people easily agree to a compromise and can adapt to each other, then after 10 years a period of reassessment of life priorities begins. Now you absolutely know exactly what you want from life, you have found your purpose and highlighted your preferences. Not a single person will be able to invade your usual rhythm of life and build it according to their own understanding. On the other hand, you acquire a valuable ability to see a person more deeply. You know what personality type suits you best, as well as what type of behavior you can't put up with.

Many men prefer young girls

But in order to attract the attention of a man over 30, you have to try hard. Even if you don't have "luggage" in the form of children from a previous marriage, there is no guarantee that a potential partner will want to build a long-term relationship with you. Many of your peers prefer young 20-year-old girls, which greatly reduces your chances for personal happiness. Young ladies are perceived by the representatives of the stronger sex as more cheerful, funny, cute, and also having fewer expectations. In addition, male biology, also sharpened for procreation, comes into play. That is why, among other things being equal, preference is usually given to a younger body. Many men, when registering on dating sites, put an age filter for applicants, where candidates over 35 are simply not considered. Unfortunately, this biology-based reality is very difficult to change.

Potential partners have a lot of life baggage

There is another reason why men are more willing to meet 20-year-old girls. Young naive creatures, as a rule, have not yet seen life, do not have a rich track record of love victories, and are also not burdened with children. However, this statement also works the other way around. Single men after 30 years old can also have baggage from past unsuccessful relationships (or even several) and children. And if the connection stopped, then there were good and even unpleasant reasons for that. A man could survive betrayal and betrayal by his wife, and this deep wound can still bleed. The behavior of an ex-wife and the negative consequences that a failed marriage entailed can lead to a fear of entering into a new relationship. Be prepared for the fact that the ghosts of former love or constant comparisons will haunt you for some time.

Common interests come to the fore

When, despite all the obstacles, you are determined to find someone from the category of your peers to live together, a community of interests comes to the fore. If there is a lot in common between you and a potential partner, you are more likely to build a harmonious relationship. Moreover, your childhood and youthful memories will be too similar. This will give you the opportunity to better understand each other. Shared hobbies and the same worldview can also bring a couple together. If you're both in your 30s, chances are you'll both prefer going to a museum rather than hanging out in a bar.

Apps come to the rescue

To find that one, you need to know where to look. Free dating sites are flooded with people looking for a one night stand adventure. This option is immediately removed. In order to find a soul mate, you need to register in applications that reflect the essence of your interests. When people share and deeply love the same thing, it is much easier for them to find common ground with each other.