Attending parent-teacher conferences is a duty or a right

18.07.2019

The school and the family are responsible for the education and upbringing of children, so they must work closely together. So far, parent-teacher meetings remain the main way of interaction between family and school - school-wide and classroom.

Parent-class meetings are held by the homeroom teacher in accordance with his job responsibilities, usually every quarter.

For teachers and parents, parent-class meetings serve as a place for mutual information about the education and upbringing of schoolchildren, setting common goals, creating a team of like-minded people, teaching parents in parenting methods, organizing joint events with students, etc.

Why do parents hate going to parent-teacher conferences?

Because many parents consider parenting meetings a waste of time and idle talk.

A few typical comments from parents about classroom parenting meetings on the Internet :

— The methodology for conducting class meetings is almost always the same: at the beginning of the complaint that parents do not attend meetings well, then they distribute leaflets with assessments of the children. Then hard-hitting comments follow, and parents take turns shrinking into a ball at their desk, blushing and turning pale or starting to argue with teachers, often in raised tones.

— For 12 years spent by my son at school, I can not recall a single meeting with pleasure. Tyagomotin, constant reprimands to everyone and for everything, rare praise to one or two excellent students.

— When it comes to financial matters, I want only one thing - to give money, as much as they say, and leave the premises as soon as possible.

—I would gladly pay for someone to go there for me and check in.

— By and large, the teacher does not care who comes: mother, father, grandmother, grandfather, neighbor or uncle Vitya. The main thing is that he shows up, receives information, votes and donates money, when and how much is needed.

— Parents' meeting is a very long drawn-out video that is forcibly made to watch.

— We had such a classroom that constantly depressed us and treated the parents of the children as delinquent schoolchildren.

Unfortunately, positive comments are much less common.

In Moscow, they proposed to solve the issue of attending general school meetings via the Internet. Parents of each student can get answers to general questions related to education at online meetings. All issues are discussed online. These meetings are usually held every two weeks. In this case, parents of schoolchildren do not need to attend meetings. So far, this is being carried out as part of an experiment.

Are parents required to attend meetings?

Sometimes class teachers require parents to be present at the meeting. Those who do not show up are asked to write an explanatory note or are summoned to speak with the school principal. Is it legal?

According to the Federal Law "On Education in the Russian Federation" (Article 44), parents have the right to:

get acquainted with the content of education, the methods of teaching and upbringing used, educational technologies, as well as with the assessments of the child's progress;
receive information on all types of planned examinations of the student and agree to conduct such a survey;
take part in the management of the organization.

Parents' meetings, open days, open lessons for parents are a form of exercising the rights of parents to participate in the management of an educational institution, to receive information about the educational process.

At the same time, the Law does not regulate attendance at parental meetings as the obligation of parents. Therefore, the legislation does not provide for administrative responsibility for the fact that parents do not attend the parent meeting at school. Moreover, the school is not an organization that can penalize participants in the educational process for certain actions. Also, the school has no right to oblige parents to write explanatory notes.

If parents are unable to attend meetings, they can get the information they need by attending one-on-one counseling sessions. Each teacher has scheduled hours for individual discussions with parents during working hours. During such individual meetings, issues are discussed that directly relate to the child's school life, learning and behavior.

At the same time, parents should be involved in the upbringing and education of their children. Therefore, if parents do not systematically attend parent-teacher meetings, are not interested in their child's school life, then this situation should alert the teacher and the school.

It often happens that parents, due to their employment at work, cannot attend the meeting in person, and instead of them the grandparents of the children come to the meeting. Is it legal?

If parents warn the class teacher that their grandparents will come to the meeting instead, then this is quite possible. There are no legal grounds to deny them the presence at the parent meeting. However, the parents are the official representatives of the child, and only they have the right to resolve certain issues that arise in the process of discussion with the parents and the teacher.

What to do?

Today the situation has changed significantly: the majority of parents have access to the Internet, each school has its own website, which contains all the information necessary for parents, students have electronic diaries, by which parents can track the success and failure of their children in education, receive advice from teachers. receive certain information about the student via SMS messages, etc. Thus, parents can obtain a significant amount of necessary information through the Internet.

From a parent's point of view:

the parent meeting should be as informative as possible, and the information should be equally important for all parents;
the mistakes and misdeeds of children should not be discussed publicly, as well as their appearance;
solving financial issues should not be the main topic for discussion;
it is advisable that the topics of the upcoming parenting meetings are discussed and agreed upon with the parents in advance;
parents with interest attend meetings at which the school psychologist is present and answers questions;
the presence of subject teachers in classroom meetings is not desirable, because this often leads to conflict situations and senseless skirmishes, because among parents there is always at least one dissatisfied with the quality of teaching.

Consequently, the parent meeting today must be unconventional. And this means that at parent-teacher meetings such methods and techniques should be used that activate the attention of parents, contribute to easier memorization of the essence of conversations, create a special mood for a friendly, frank, business-like conversation.

Non-traditional methods of parenting meetings increase the interest of parents in the issues of raising children, significantly improve turnout, and motivate parents to solve problems of upbringing.

Dear Parents! Help the school make your parenting meeting interesting!

P.S. Scenarios for parenting meetings in non-traditional form, as well as the methodology for their conduct, can be found on the Internet.

Used in preparation:

Attending classroom parenting meetings is a necessity or a duty

A typical parent meeting description: "They quickly told who had bad behavior, praise for excellent students and successful students, and then the favorite part is collecting money." .

Is this really how parent-homeroom meetings should go? What should they be like in reality?

What it is?

This is a formal event organized by the school to showcase and discuss student success and improve the learning environment (collaboratively).

V the law "On education in the Russian Federation" parent-teacher conferences are not mentioned. Every school releases your document – "Regulation on the classroom parent meeting", in which it highlights goals, objectives, rules, etc., and reveals functions.

Having a problem with your parent meeting or parent committee and want to make a complaint? Check out your school's Parent-teacher conference. In the statement, rely on its points so that the claims are supported by documents. Write which articles are violated, then the claim will look more convincing.

Required for all parenting meetings:

1) Held every quarter (but they can also more often, if necessary, for example, problems in the classroom);
2) Must-see for moms and dads (if you cannot come, you need to notify the class teacher by call, SMS or through the child);
3) Parents should know when there will be a meeting no later than three days before the event (as a rule, through inserts in diaries or in groups of social networks).

What should be in parenting meetings:

1) familiarization with new laws and local acts (adopted at the level of school, city, region) related to the education of children.
2) Meeting with subject students (I’ll say right away that teachers do not like to go to parent-teacher meetings, they may have their own at this time, and often such meetings are delayed). The class teacher is inviting. Ask for a meeting with more “problematic” educators. Misunderstandings between parents and teachers will surely dissipate after this meeting.
3) Keeping minutes of the meeting ... Written by the secretary (selected parent), signed by the chairman of the parent committee. We need more for the accountability of the school to the inspection authorities.

What can happen at a parent meeting?

1) meeting with specialists (psychologist, doctor, lawyer, ombudsman, etc.). What problem worries parents - such a specialist can be invited (either the class teacher or the parents are invited, maybe the administration);
2) watching documentaries and educational films about the upbringing, physiological development of children in adolescence, etc.

What should not be at the parent meeting:

1) public discussion successes and failures of individual students, their behavior, appearance, etc. (complete tactlessness on the part of the class teacher or parent-instigators of the conversation!). If this happens at a meeting of your class, you have the right to file a complaint. Everything that the class teacher wants to say about your child, only you should know on an individual basis.
If there is a conflict in the class in which several students in the class are involved, the conversation is conducted only with the parents of these students, and not with all.
2) such a large-scale condemned phenomenon as collecting money (school fund, security, cleaning services are not the responsibility of the parents!). In I told in detail what to do to parents if they collect "tribute" again.
Of course, this should not always be condemned. Sometimes you have to collect money for gifts or, but the parent committee should organize this and provide a full account of all funds spent .

What to do if you missed the parenting meeting

Of course, no one will scold you and there is no need to write a statement to the head teacher about this either. Parents' meetings are organized for you, parents, to familiarize you with school innovations, class problems, to discuss progress and where to go during the holidays. Often, it is only at meetings that it turns out to distribute to parents any questionnaires, applications, etc. and immediately receive them filled out. After all, children can lose them, break them, or simply not convey them to their parents.

If you know that for some reason you will miss - let the class teacher know about it. And it will be better if you still agree that you will come at another time ... The class teacher is asked for attending parent-teacher meetings, so it is important for him that you are there. If the parent practically does not attend parent-teacher meetings, this will be a “wake-up call” for the teacher about whether the parent is interested in his child at all.

If you are not familiar with school charter, with your school's Parents' Class Meeting Regulation – be sure to read ... A problem will arise - you will be fully armed.

Still have questions? Write in the comments, we will definitely try to help you.

During all the years of school, our dad was at the meeting two times, no more. Once they persuaded my grandmother to go. When my sister and I were schoolgirls, our father also avoided meetings with all his might. Mom had nowhere to go, and she served her parental duty with patience and obedience.

I had a chance to ask friends of different ages about how they relate to at school. Only three out of several dozen respondents answered that they really enjoy attending meetings and working on the parent committee. The attitude of the rest ranges from indifferent to sharply negative.

What is the reason for the parents' dislike of school meetings?

Many parents consider meetings a waste of time and empty chatter (I confess, and I am one of those parents). Parents are not interested in hearing about the successes or misdeeds of other people's children. And it is completely unpleasant when they publicly discuss the misconduct and problems of their own child. Parents of middle and high school students find it easier to learn everything they need by talking to their homeroom teacher or subject teacher individually. 15 minutes of such a conversation gives more information than being present for 2 hours in a meeting.

And, nevertheless, parenting meetings still remain the main way of interaction between the family and the school in the educational process. What should be the parent meeting from the point of view of parents:

As informative as possible. The information should be equally important to all parents.
The mistakes and misdeeds of children should not be discussed publicly, as well as their appearance.
Financial issues should not be the main topic of discussion.

In addition, many parents would like to have a preliminary discussion and agreement on the topics of the upcoming parents' meetings.

The most important meeting is the first. If the new one can interest the parents at the very first meeting, then the attendance will be at its best later. Moms and dads attend meetings with interest, where a school psychologist is present and answers questions. But the presence of subject teachers at class meetings often leads to conflict situations and senseless skirmishes, because among parents there is always at least one dissatisfied with the quality of teaching.

Such parents are a priori sure that they know about upbringing, if not all, then much more teachers. The opinion of such parents is categorically and loudly expressed at every opportunity, they are able to turn any, even the most constructive, meeting into a meaningless discussion. Not every class teacher has enough firmness and tact to call to order a lover of a noisy showdown.

As a result, it turns out that the teacher must not only give all the best in front of the students, but also invent ways to interest the parents. Engage in participation in the educational process, encourage cooperation with the school, convince not to miss class meetings. And all this - showing the wonders of endurance and tact.

Looking from the outside at the teacher's work, infinitely responsible and so little appreciated by the state and its citizens, I very much sympathize with those who teach and educate our children. This is probably one of the most stressful and difficult professions.

For 12 years spent by my son at school, I can not recall a single meeting with pleasure.

But parental meetings, nevertheless, I still do not like. Honestly, for the 12 years my son spent at school, I can not recall a single meeting with pleasure. Tyagomotin, constant reprimands to everyone and for everything, and rare praise to one or two excellent students. Moreover, it was not one school, not the same class teacher (the son studied in three schools, and at least five class teachers were replaced), and the methodology for holding class meetings is almost always the same: at the beginning, they complain that parents do not attend well meetings, then hand out leaflets with children's assessments. Then hard-hitting comments follow, and parents take turns shrinking into a ball at their desk, blushing and turning pale. Or they start arguing with teachers, often in a raised voice. When it comes to financial issues, I want only one thing - to give as much money as they say and leave the premises as soon as possible.

Probably, we just had no luck with parenting meetings. I would like to believe that the parents of today's schoolchildren will be more fortunate.

A typical parent meeting description: "They quickly told who had bad behavior, praise for excellent students and successful students, and then the favorite part is collecting money." .

Is this really how parent-homeroom meetings should go? What should they be like in reality?

What it is?

This is a formal event organized by the school to showcase and discuss student success and improve the learning environment (collaboratively).

Required for all parenting meetings:

What should be in parenting meetings:

What can happen at a parent meeting?

What should not be at the parent meeting:

What to do if you missed the parenting meeting

If you are not familiar with school charter, with your school's Parents' Class Meeting Regulation – be sure to read ... A problem will arise - you will be fully armed.

Still have questions? Write in the comments, we will definitely try to help you.

Yesterday I was at the parent meeting.

There were many parents - 19 out of 25. This is more than usual. And this is the merit of the class teacher, who knows how to lift parents off the couch, or create such motivation for them to come. This is impressive.

But to maintain this motivation neither at the meeting, nor at the directors' council, although everyone goes to it, still, in my opinion, it is not entirely possible. Sometimes even I catch myself thinking why am i sitting there, is it all the same and nothing new?

Perhaps that is why the same parents go to all meetings, whose children are already good at school and cope with everything, but who nevertheless hope to hear something useful for themselves and their child, and do not lose sight of that. what's happening.

But maybe parents who do not attend parent-teacher meetings have their own truth? And they just behave like their kids who don't want to learn and misbehave. They just do not hope hear nothing new and interesting there and don't believe that such brainstorming can help them realistically solve their problems, and not just with children.

Therefore, out of two evils: sitting in a meeting, wasting time and getting upset about what you still cannot change, or sitting at home doing nothing, choose the latter.

And I thought about what I, as a parent, would like to hear at this meeting?

No, I’m not saying that the pedagogical team does nothing at school. Far from it. And I respect them for everything. what are they doing. Now I'm talking about how there is a big difference in what people do and how they talk about it.

After all, talking about your work does not mean bragging, or somehow not behaving modestly. This is not at all about this now. I just think it would be more interesting to hear some more specific things that have been implemented at school in the last quarter to achieve the academic performance that is.

And hearing that in our school the percentage of progress is 68%, or 73%, of course, I am very pleased, but when you hear this constantly, the result is leveled. After all, you cannot estimate how much labor has been invested in this particular quarter to maintain such a high percentage? What specific things have been done to help the children improve their academic performance?

Then parents would be able to realize the real contribution of teachers to the education of their children. Perhaps all this is there, and methods, and tasks, and examples, and all this is being done, but for now listen it’s not interesting, let alone start using something at home.

Of course, you need to know how your child learns and how the child gets along in a team and how he manifests himself in school life, because children do not always tell their parents about what is happening to them, or they say so that the picture may seem more safe than it really is.

And to get some kind of objective picture, it doesn't bother anyone to be there. Although, I think that there is very little you can learn about your child if he does not break discipline and study well. Don't we have problems with upbringing?

But, like children, forcing a parent to go to a meeting and take an interest in the life of their child is useless and thankless. Apart from irritation, this does not cause anything.

But not everyone can create an internal need to educate and watch their child.

Maybe there are not enough specific examples of how to act in one case or another, and what to be guided by and what to consider correct when you explain something to your child. And parsing a specific problem ...

But here another question arises, because everyone has their own problems, and perhaps someone will not be interested in listening to the same thing? - you might say.

But if we single out common problems that can manifest themselves at all stages of development, at all ages ... and each time prepare a kind of “reference book” and a manual on how to better help a child to cope, then maybe it will be more interesting for those who who teaches, and for those who educate?

For example, yesterday a math teacher said that computational skills suffer in children.

But about how to improve them, other than just doing your homework and how to turn these computational skills into an interesting activity in the evenings, or about something else in which a love of mathematics could be manifested, nothing and never about that. not spoken except for the general words "SHOULD" and "SHOULD".

Although there are quite a few excellent books on this issue, but not all of them read and very few people know about them ...

Those. you need to "infect" your parents with your love for mathematics, and they will find ways to convey their enthusiasm to their children.

No, I'm not talking about the fact that no recommendations are given about what the teacher needs parental help in? They talk about them. But all of them are somehow dry and uninteresting that the child is unlikely to carry them out with enthusiasm ...

They cannot be turned into a game - that is, in my opinion, the problem.

So why am I saying all this now?

It's just that we can never awaken a child's interest in knowledge if we ourselves are not interested in what we are doing. And those who DO NOT keep up will not necessarily grow up to be bad people.

But very often they make good entrepreneurs who have no money problems. Not all of them, of course. But excellent students do not always succeed.

IT IS OBTAINED FROM THOSE who got to the bottom of what interests them the most in the world, and allowed himself to follow his interest.

So maybe we, adults, often follow our own?