How weddings were held in Russia. Wedding ceremonies in Russia. Vintage wedding ceremonies

13.08.2019

The history of the Russian people is very interesting and completely forgotten in vain. We invite you to find out the wedding rituals and traditions that were carried out in ancient Russia and were part of the wedding ritual, but today they have been successfully forgotten or altered in a new way.

Matchmaking

Matchmaking is not only an unexpected arrival of the groom, accompanied by relatives, to the bride's house to allegorically woo (show himself and see the goods). Matchmaking was the starting point from which the rebirth of the main participants in the wedding ceremony, the bride and groom, literally began. From the moment of her marriage, a restriction in movement was imposed on the bride (conspiracy), her living space sharply narrowed to the limits of the parental home. If the girl went out, it was only accompanied by her friends and, in fact, only to invite guests to the wedding. The bride also removed herself from all household chores and became incapacitated. So there was a gradual "dehumanization" necessary for the birth of a new person, already a family one.

Bride

Two or three days after the matchmaking, the groom and his close relatives again come to the bride's house, now for the bridegroom, during which the girl must show herself in all her glory and demonstrate all her skills and abilities, just like the groom, who flaunts in front of all gathered. After that, the groom's mother closely examines and evaluates the bride's dowry. Everything that happens is necessarily accompanied by songs and lamentations, most often performed by the bride's friends. However, the girl could refuse to marry without going to the groom.

Handicap

Shortly before the planned wedding day, there was a hand-arm or a binge, an event that finally consolidated the agreement on the wedding. After the handshake, it was impossible to refuse the wedding. The bride and groom were seated side by side at the table and dignified in songs that were sung by the bride's friends.

And what do the bride and groom themselves do? The bride does not speak, but laments, and in some houses they even call the vystnik, which “howls,” that is, performs the oaths, and the bride groans and cries. And, despite the apparent activity of the groom, his constant movements (he comes to the bride's house almost every day after hand-kicking for "visits", "kisses", "escorts"), he still remains passive: the matchmakers speak and do everything for him, relatives, friends.

hen-party

Has this rite also disappeared? The fact is that a bachelorette party in Russia is not only the farewell gatherings of the bride with her friends on the eve of the wedding, but also the making of “beauty” (“will”), unweaving of braids, washing the bride in the bath, destroying or transferring “beauty” to a friend or groom. Maiden "beauty" is the last thing that connects the bride with her girlhood. It could be a tow, a tree decorated with ribbons and patches, a wreath, a scarf. After the "beauty" was made, it was burned or the bride handed it out to close friends. Whatever the object symbolizing "beauty", it is invariably associated with the head, or rather hair, and hair is a kind of personification of girlish beauty, will. With the destruction or distribution of "beauty", the girl allegorically lost her girlhood.

Also, the bride could cut off the braid and give it to the groom. And the ritual bathing in the bath finally completed the process: the bride became: “neither alive nor dead,” and in this state she was handed over to the groom, arranged bargaining, and the bride and her girlfriends resisted with all their might.

Young woman's hairstyle

Immediately after the wedding, the bride was given a young woman's hairstyle: they braided two braids and covered their head with a scarf, or they immediately "twisted it like a woman's": the hair braided in two braids was twisted into a bun at the back of the head, and a married woman's headdress was worn on top (warrior, ochtok, basting) ... From that moment on, only the husband could see the bride's hair: to appear with an uncovered head to a stranger was tantamount to treason, and to rip off a woman's headdress was an insult. A change in hairstyle means the transition of a girl to the power of her husband, and also represents the formation of a new image of a person, his rebirth in a new status. The girl begins to "come to life": the ability to move independently returns to her, as well as the ability to do everything with her own hands: the bride, entering the house, begins to actively explore its space, throws rye, puts a cow, throws a belt, etc.

"Uncovering the Bride"

A special ceremony was dedicated to "revealing" the bride, when the young people came from under the aisle to the groom's house. This ceremony was endowed with a double meaning: for the bride, it meant the return of sight; the bride, continuing to come to life, now looked at everything with different eyes, but for the groom it was a kind of recognition of his beloved, since she was now different. In some details of the ritual, an erotic meaning is read when the bride is "opened": the father-in-law or boyfriend lifts the hem with a whip, a grab, a pie or a stick. Or a pie without filling, symbolizing a child, was put on the bride's head, and wrapped in a scarf, put in a closet, where the young people first ate separately from everyone, and then spent their wedding night. In some areas, it was customary to make a bed for newlyweds in a crate or barn, which is associated with the idea of fertility, childbearing.

"Bends"

"Otvodiny" (a joint visit by young parents of the bride) marks the end of the wedding as a special state for all its participants. This element of the wedding ceremony is especially important for the bride who comes for a short time and as a guest, which emphasizes the irreversibility of all the transformations that happened to her during the wedding. However, there are other data on the relationship of the bride with her home. For example, in the Voronezh province, during the first year of marriage, the young woman lived with her mother and was engaged in spinning for her future needs.

Wedding wedding traditions in Russia are a mixture of old Russian rituals, traditions of the Soviet period and Western influences. Recently, more and more often we can see how Western-style weddings are held in Russia: with off-site registration, without toastmaster, contests, accordion player, ransom and loaf, but still, most of them still prefer classic Russian weddings. In this article, we will take a closer look at how a traditional Russian wedding goes.

There are many signs and traditions, and some of them relate to the preparation period for the wedding: this is a traditional matchmaking, which now takes the form of a small feast for parents and newlyweds.

There is also a tradition of bachelorette and bachelor parties. According to Russian traditions, a bachelorette party was held before the wedding day: the bridesmaids gathered there, the bride cried and lamented, said goodbye to girlhood, unweaved her braid.

Nowadays, bachelorette and bachelor parties are increasingly being carried out as we often see in Hollywood films - fun, noisy and with alcohol.

Let's go back directly to the day of the celebration. What ceremony begins almost any Russian wedding?

Ransom of the bride

Previously, the word ransom was not a metaphor at all! Indeed, the bride was ransomed from the parental home.

Now money has faded into the background. The buyback, which is usually arranged by the bridesmaids, takes place at the girl's parents' house and includes competitions. By going through these contests, the groom proves that he knows and loves the bride well, and the groom's friends should come to his aid.

This is how the wedding fun begins. Having risen to the bride's house, the groom takes her to register the marriage. Usually, during and after the bride's ransom, the bride's parents arrange a small buffet table.

Wedding ceremony

After the redemption, the couple is traditionally, and after her the guests leave for the registry office, where the marriage is officially registered. There, the newlyweds perform their first dance, for which they often order live music.

After accepting congratulations from the guests, a small photo session is usually held, first for everyone, and then only for the newlyweds, during which the guests prepare for the exit of the bride and groom from the registry office.

Guests sprinkle newlyweds with rice (for the early birth of children), sweets (for a sweet life), coins (for wealth) and rose petals (for a beautiful, romantic life together).

Orthodox churched couples also undergo a wedding ceremony in a church.

Wedding walk

After registering a marriage, guests (often only young friends and girlfriends of the newlyweds) go for a walk around the city. At the same time, they try to visit the most beautiful sights in order to take pictures there.

Seven bridges

We have all seen how the groom carries the bride across the bridge. It turns out that this rite also applies to wedding customs and traditions in Russia.

It is believed that the newlyweds will cross the seven bridges on their wedding day, then their marriage will be strong. It rarely happens that a couple manages to bypass all seven bridges, but at least one is trying to cross all.

Also, a lock with the names of the newlyweds is often hung on the bridge, which, according to belief, seals the marriage.

Bread and salt

Traditionally, after the wedding, newlyweds come to the house of the groom's parents, where they meet them with bread and salt.

Usually, a newly-made mother-in-law holds a loaf on a towel (a special towel), from which the bride and groom must bite off a piece. Whoever bites off more will be the head of the family.

Wedding traditions and customs of the Russian people today are losing touch with religion: earlier in this way the groom's parents blessed the newlyweds, the groom's father kept icons for this. A loaf for a wedding is a tradition that originated from here.

Now they are greeted with a wedding loaf at the restaurant, where a banquet will be held on the occasion of the celebration.

Festive feast

The holiday continues in a cafe or restaurant, where everything is already ready for the arrival of the newlyweds. The decoration of the hall, tables and menu is usually chosen in advance.

This is a separate topic worthy of a huge post. Now we are talking about the traditions of the wedding feast.

Congratulations

The whole holiday is arranged in such a way that special attention is paid to congratulations: everyone will have time to congratulate! Usually, the parents are the first to congratulate, they are given the floor, and they kind of bless the children for marriage.

After that, relatives congratulate: first on one side, then on the other, and then friends. Often, the bride prepares a special box in advance, in which she puts envelopes with money so that they are not lost.

Dancing

After the guests have eaten, the dancing begins. But even here it is not without traditions. The first dance of the bride and groom is obligatory. Recently, it has become fashionable to prepare this dance in advance, to make it unusual, brides change their dress for the dance, grooms can also change clothes. Of course, such dances are remembered by the guests.

Another dance, without which it is difficult to imagine a Russian wedding, is the dance of the bride and her father. With this dance, dad, as it were, escorts his daughter to another family, says goodbye to her. This touching dance reminds of a completely new time in the life of the bride.

Family hearth

An ancient tradition that is still popular today. How to conduct a family hearth?

The organizers and assistants distribute small candles to the guests.
The guests stand in a circle and light candles.
The light goes off in the hall.
To slow music, the presenter tells a parable about the family hearth.
Parents light their candles and go up to the young.
A new flame of the newlyweds' candle is created - a family hearth.

The ceremony of removing the veil

Traditionally, at the end of the holiday, the mother-in-law or mother of the bride takes off the veil. At first, the bride should not agree, only the third time does the mother manage to persuade her to take off the veil.

After the veil has been removed, the groom undoes the bride's braids. During the ceremony, the presenter usually explains what is happening, tells the story of the ceremony. This moment of the wedding always turns out to be very touching.

Second wedding day

But the holiday does not end there! The first day is followed by the second wedding day, the traditions of which already provide for an unofficial celebration.

On the second day, guests most often gather in nature, where they drink, sing songs and grill a barbecue. Nowadays, a wedding is rarely celebrated for more than two days. After the wedding, the newlyweds can go on a honeymoon trip.

These are the traditions of weddings in Russia. Of course, these are not all the rituals that exist, many of the traditions are already leaving, but new ones are replacing them.

So, less and less, fortunately, at weddings we can meet vulgar contests that were very popular 10 years ago. Themed weddings and outdoor weddings are gaining popularity now.

In any case, you are not obliged to follow all wedding traditions and customs, the main thing is that your wedding is remembered and liked by you!

Many people wonder where the beautiful tradition of holding a wedding came from? Why are they having a bachelor party and a bachelorette party? Why should a bride wear a white dress? What does veil mean?

It turns out that all wedding traditions and customs came directly to us from our ancestors. The history of wedding customs in Russia and marriage dates back to the times of Ancient Russia.

Wedding ceremonies in Russia

The Slavs believed that the main conditions were that the bride had to correspond to the groom in status, including material status. If the girl's family lived in wealth, then the groom was chosen not lower than the rank. An interesting fact, the groom might not even see his future wife in the face, just like her future husband. The parents chose a wife for their son. They could only see each other during the wedding. The bride could be quite young, no more than thirteen years old. At such a young age, she already knew how to do everything around the house, sew, cook. It was believed that the wedding should be held either in the fall or in the winter. Cover; a sacred holiday honored by the Slavs. The veil blesses young spouses for a long, happy life.

Wedding ceremonies in Ancient Russia took place in three stages. First, it was time to prepare. This stage was called the pre-wedding stage. It included matchmaking, meeting parents, a bachelorette party, and preparing a dowry.

Matchmaking

After the couple decided to join the knot, the girl's family was actively preparing to meet the groom and his parents. Father-in-law and mother-in-law were called matchmakers. This name of the family has remained to this day. A large table was laid with a white tablecloth. We were preparing a delicious lunch. The young guy shouldn't have just come, especially alone and empty-handed. He was supposed to come along with all his relatives, father, grandfather, brothers on a horse-drawn cart. Everything is decorated with ribbons and bells so that everyone can see that people are going to get married. The bride had to hear the groom approaching and run out to meet him.

We all got to know each other. The young groom gave gifts to the parents. The future father-in-law was given wine, meat, sheepskin coat, vest made of animal skin. Beaver, fox, bear. The gift ritual signified high respect and serious intentions for their daughter.

After the blessing of the parents, the date of the wedding was set. Then the girl begins to prepare a dowry for herself. She was helped by her mother, elder sister, grandmother. The dowry was different and everything depended on the same marital status:

Bachelorette and bachelor parties

The newly made bride was having a bachelorette party. They spent it on the eve of the upcoming wedding, three days in advance. This is not a fun party for friends with gifts, as we have now. It was all very different.

In Ancient Russia, the bride gathered all the women of the village, girlfriends, relatives. Be sure to invite a vydnitsa into the house. There were very few of these women in Russia, therefore they were held in high esteem among the Slavs. Vytnitsa sang a suffering song, and the girl cried. So it was customary to say goodbye to youth, their carefree youth, parental home. She definitely had to cry, otherwise an unhappy marriage awaited.

After that, the girl called all the women to her house for the table. They drank wine, ate and cried. She gave two belts to all women. Then everyone started singing songs. They sang and sang, and if the parents allowed their daughter to leave the house, then they went to the field (in summer) or went on a sleigh (in winter), sang songs loudly in chorus. Then the girl went with her best friends to the bathhouse, who washed her for the upcoming wedding.

But with the groom, everything was not so fun. He just walked alone to the bathhouse and he had to be silent all night.

The second stage of the ancient wedding ceremony in Russia was called wedding, of course, it included the celebration itself. The first wedding ceremony in Russia began early at dawn. The future wife read different spells from the evil eye in the house of the future husband.

Then the groom came to fetch his bride, but in order to pick her up, or rather to get to her, he had to complete many difficult tasks. Everything was fun. All relatives from the bride's side took part in it. First, they blocked the entrance of the groom to the village itself. Then to the gate. If the groom could not cope with the obstacle, then he had to pay in coin. They didn’t try to rip it off to the skin. That was the tradition. Only a friend-witness was allowed to help.

The wedding ceremony itself in Russia took place in a cheerful, solemn atmosphere. At the entrance to the ceremony, the groom's mother sprinkled both oats and millet on the young. This ceremony meant wealth in the future family.

Everyone, young and old, was invited to the wedding. Neighbors, friends and all relatives. Any person could come to the wedding, even a stranger.

What was customary to give for a wedding

According to ancient Russian traditions, it was customary for newlyweds to give

white towels with beautiful fringes;
a whip so that the wife does not forget who is the boss in the house, where she belongs;
various kitchen utensils;
products from porcelain, crystal.

They gave gifts not only to the young, but also to the parents of the spouses.

A rich wedding in Russia, the traditions of which have survived to this day, looked according to the status of the groom. If the groom is rich, then the festive table is rich. Lots of meat, fresh food, wine, pickles. If the groom was poor, then the wedding table was also poor and modest.

Why did the bride wear a white dress?

The Slavs considered a white dress an indicator of a girl's innocence and spiritual purity. If the girl was not innocent, she had no right to wear a white dress. This was punished and considered as disrespect for Russian traditions.

The girl's bouquet was collected by her mother-in-law from wild flowers, which she found even in winter. That was the tradition. In Russia, a wedding was a holiday for the entire village. Everyone sang and danced. The wedding lasted exactly three days. This was done on purpose to test the endurance of the young. They had to incubate all three days, otherwise happiness will not be seen.

On the second wedding day, the young people went to a bed prepared in advance by relatives for them, which could be in the barn, in the hayloft or in the bathhouse. Then anyone could come there and look at the bride's shirt, proving her innocence. This is how weddings took place in Russia. Traditions are very interesting and not invented from the head.

After the young spouses returned to the wedding celebration, the matchmaker took off the veil from the bride and put on a kick. A headdress that meant that the bride was no longer a girl, but now a wife, mistress of the house, future mother.

Wedding ceremonies of the Slavs are still in demand among today's newlyweds. People have kept the customs and traditions of their ancestors for decades.

Slavic wedding ceremonies are loved by many modern people. Wedding planners always include many customs and traditions from antiquity.

After the wedding

Three wedding days have passed. Now the young begin to live together. The groom always carried the bride into the house in his arms. This was considered a good belief. So he told the housekeeper that now the hostess is a woman.

A woman and a man remain faithful to each other to the end, because during the marriage ceremony they took an oath before God. This was considered an important ceremony in Russia. Their first kiss happened at the wedding. Over the years, there was love to a friend for a friend and respect.

If the family lived happily, richly, this meant that they performed all the necessary ceremonies during the wedding and adhered to ancient Russian traditions. The woman kept the dress in a chest and took it out only to give it to her daughter. But that was not necessary. The dress could be sewn by the girl herself with her friends.

When the husband died, the wife remained a widow for life, she could no longer marry.

These are interesting traditions that came to us from Ancient Russia. All the customs were not invented from scratch, they carried a whole history that has survived to this day.

It is hard to imagine that in our days a bride every morning, from the moment of matchmaking until the very day of marriage, would leave the house and lament, sob, mourn her girlhood, beauty, youth.

However, as it is with difficulty, many of those customs and rituals that were once an integral part of the wedding ritual, and now are either forgotten, or lost, or rethought, now seem to be possible ...

Matchmaking

Bride

Handicraft

And what do the bride and groom themselves do? The bride does not talk, but laments, and in some houses they even call the vytilnik, which “howls,” that is, performs the oaths, and the bride groans and cries. And, despite the apparent activity of the groom, his constant movements (he comes to the bride's house almost every day after hand-kicking for "visits", "kisses", "escorts"), he still remains passive: the matchmakers speak and do everything for him, relatives, friends.

hen-party

Has this rite also disappeared? The fact is that a bachelorette party in Russia is not only the farewell gatherings of the bride with her friends on the eve of the wedding, but also the making of “beauty” (“will”), unweaving of braids, washing the bride in a bath, destroying or transferring “beauty” to a friend or groom. Maiden "beauty" is the last thing that connects the bride with her girlhood. It could be a tow, a tree decorated with ribbons and patches, a wreath, a scarf. After the "beauty" was made, it was burned or the bride handed it out to close friends. Whatever the object symbolizing "beauty", it is invariably associated with the head, or rather hair, and hair is a kind of personification of girlish beauty, will. With the destruction or distribution of "beauty", the girl allegorically lost her girlhood.

Young woman's hairstyle

Uncovering the bride

Bends

The Russian wedding originates in antiquity, combining both ancient Russian pagan rites and newer, Christian customs. At the crossroads of cultures, time-tested, wedding ceremonies in Russia are known for their complexity and beauty. As a rule, the celebration was preceded by a long one.

From antiquity - to our days, with love from distant ancestors

Preparation for the celebration

Matchmaking

As many people know, the tradition of the Russian wedding implies the beginning with the custom of matchmaking - the groom's relatives loudly, with songs and rich gifts, went to the bride's house, where the matchmakers told how good the future husband is and how rich his house is. It was believed that the bride and groom must necessarily match each other in terms of financial position.

Unequal marriages were extremely rare and were considered rather an exception, and therefore, parents considered well-being and health to be an important quality when choosing a life partner for their child.

Bride

Next, the Russian wedding ceremony implies a bride - essentially the same as matchmaking, but a little later and exactly the opposite. Now the bride's relatives were eager to show that the girl is quite good-looking and economic. At bride shows, hand-embroidered towels or tablecloths were often used as gifts by the bride - this was to show the girl's talent for needlework.

If both parties were satisfied, the engagement was concluded and preparations for the celebration began. A wedding in Russia was traditionally held in the fall or winter - so, according to the Orthodox tradition, the new family found itself under the patronage of the Mother of God, who contributed to the well-being and health of future heirs.

Bachelor and bachelorette parties

The wedding ceremony in Russia also included a bachelor party and a bachelorette party, which took place three days before the celebration. And the bachelorette party was not at all cheerful: the bride was supposed to cry. For this, the Russian wedding tradition suggested inviting all the girls of the village, relatives and girlfriends, as well as a special guest, a vytnitsa, to the house. They (mourners), in the villages, were very respected, and her presence at the bachelorette party was considered mandatory.

Vytnitsa, often an elderly woman, would start a sad song, “crying,” and the bride must have been crying. This is necessary to say goodbye to your carefree youth with tears. Even if the bride was not at all unhappy, and very much even wanted to get married, it was necessary to cry, and the voice of the girl created the right mood. This is not to say that “crying” is just a song.

A real vydnitsa, performing crying, often picked up words on the go, falling into a kind of trance, and all the women present eventually cried with her and the bride.

The wedding ceremony in ancient Russia further implied that the female part of the bride's family and her girlfriends take the girl to the bathhouse, where they all wash her together, accompanied by songs, before the upcoming celebration. By this time, the groom was also supposed to be in the bathhouse, but the bachelor party was even less fun - the young man had to spend this night alone and in silence in order to:

Think about future marriage.
To become a husband from a boy.
Prepare for the challenging role of head of the family.

Bachelorette and bachelor parties have remained in the modern tradition, but in a completely different capacity.

As before, the purpose of bachelor and bachelorette parties is to say goodbye to bachelorhood. But if earlier it was customary to see her off with tears, today the young prefer to "take a walk" for the last time

Outfits of the young

The ancient wedding customs of the Russian people also mention the attire of the young at the time of the celebration. And if the groom was supposed to look rich, but the bride was supposed to dress up in a dress that she herself sewed and embroidered. Depending on the wealth of the family, the dress could be embroidered with colored thread, gold, and even pearls. The richer the family, the more jewelry on the bride's dress.

Walking around the whole village

Ransom or how they proved their prowess and strength

The wedding day began with a ransom - the groom with friends and relatives loudly, with songs, shouts and bells, came in sleighs or carts to the bride's house. The brighter the carts, the louder the motorcade, the better, everyone in the village should have known that today is a wedding.

In front of the bride's house, the groom could wait for an "ambush" - the brothers or other relatives of the bride could block the way to the house and demand a fare - "ransom".

At the very house of the bride, the groom again faced difficulties - he had to complete several tasks, prove his prowess and strength.

Such a demonstration initially had all the seriousness and practical value - rural life in Russia was not simple, and only a man who was strong in body and spirit could adequately provide everything necessary for his future wife and children.

The patriarchal tradition adopted in Russia can also be traced in wedding ceremonies. The man not only made decisions, but also took responsibility for his family, providing a truly "man's hand and shoulder" to the beloved keeper of the hearth and his heirs

Vintage wedding feast

Of course, in ancient Russia it was impossible to simply order - the groom's family was responsible for the wedding feast. The wedding was supposed to be rich, the young family, especially his mother and sisters, were busy at the table, decorated the house and waited for guests. By tradition, all acquaintances, neighbors, friends and just passers-by were invited to the wedding - anyone could drop in at the celebration and pay respect to the young people. willing.

The wedding feast, according to the Russian tradition, lasted three days, and all three days the young had to be present at the table. At the same time, they were not allowed to consume alcohol, they were allowed to eat at a minimum, and drink only water. Thus, the parents contributed to the early appearance of grandchildren. On the second day of the wedding, the newlyweds were sent to a specially prepared "bed", where on the third day everyone was admitted to show the bride's nightgown and prove her virtue and purity.

Gifts for newlyweds

It was customary to give gifts not only to newlyweds, but also to their parents. Popular gifts for the wedding, as well as today, were household utensils, dishes, textiles ... as well as ceremonial things.

For example, at a wedding, the groom was often given a whip - as a warning to the bride, so that “she knew her place and did not contradict her husband”. For the most part, such a thing, of course, had a symbolic meaning.

Since ancient times in Russia, it has been customary to give young people things that could simplify their family life

Contemporary Russian traditions

Today, young people can arrange a wedding feast as they see fit, and the old Russian wedding ceremonies are rather advisory in nature. In ancient times, their observance was strictly mandatory.

By the way, when planning a wedding feast, do not forget to pay attention to the little things:

Choose a fairly varied menu.
Take care of transport for all guests.
Don't forget about a spare bouquet and a throwing garter.
Pick up for the wedding.

Observing the wedding traditions of ancient Russia or trusting the trend of changing fashion is a private matter for each couple. It is only important to make sure that the main day remains in memory for a long time as the brightest and most joyful in the life of a young family.