Children and money: financial independence from the cradle or parental control of children's spending? Several important rules about pocket money. The teenager decided to earn extra money in the summer ...

25.06.2019

Many parents are thinking about how to teach their children how to handle money. Is it too early to pocket money at 7 years old? Should I check what the child spent them on? At what age can a bank card be used? Roman Potemkin, founder and director of UPUP - Money for Children, talks about the basics of financial literacy.

Children and money: when to start?

Introduce your child to money when he is three or four years old - in a playful way: together with the child, collect, change, count bills and coins. Pay attention to how and where to store them (in a wallet or wallet). Explain in simple terms that Mother and dad get paid not just like that, but for a certain job.

From four to five years old, the child already understands that toys and sweets are not limitless. At this age, it is important to teach him to clearly formulate his "wishes". Let him know that the amount of money is limited, and let him remember: if you want to buy some thing, you need to save up for it. Start a piggy bank and save together to purchase the desired toy.

Be sure to involve your preschooler on shopping trips. Make a grocery list together, and in the store, pay attention to the price tags. Let the child pay for the purchase on his own and receive change from the seller.

From seven to eight years old, children are able to independently manage a small amount. From this age, a school appears in the child's life and the first pocket money. It is important that by this time the child knows how to count and knows how money looks and what it is (cash and non-cash, bills and coins of various denominations, bank cards).

Pocket money: 6 rules for parents

With the beginning of school, many parents have a question: is it necessary to give pocket money? The unequivocal answer is necessary. But first of all, you need to remember a few simple rules:

Before giving pocket money, explain what it is and why you are giving it. Tell us about the necessary expenses, which will take the main part of the amount (travel, meals) and about additional expenses (toys, sweets, entertainment), on which you can spend the rest.
The amount of pocket money should not be too large, so as not to attract the attention of other children. Match it to the needs of the child and the capabilities of your family. For example, at the age of six to eight years, children can receive 100-300 rubles per week.
It is very important to issue money according to agreements: the agreed amount - at a certain time.
The size of pocket money should not depend on the mood of the parents, school grades, behavior, or the child's help in household chores. There is no need to punish with money (or rather, lack of money).
Gradually expand your child's independence. First, give him money every day, then every two days, and so on (up to a week). As he grows up, the child himself will learn to distribute the total.
Show a personal example of financial planning. Let your child listen to how you distribute wages across different items of the family budget (utilities, food, clothing, rest).

As you follow these rules, remember that your child must have the right to make mistakes. It would be better if he now "spend" his 200 rubles on chewing gum and understand that he will not save up for a toy than he will spend his entire salary on nonsense at thirty, not understanding where the money is going.

How do I control my child's expenses?

If you do not know what the child's pocket money was spent on, and you are worried about it, use bank cards or special mobile applications. A bank card, in addition to yours, can be issued for a child from 6 to 14 years old. Special mobile applications designed to quickly transfer money from parents and children will also be useful.

There are other ways to educate your child about financial literacy. Perhaps the most addicting of these are board games such as Monopoly, Cash Flow or The Game of Life.

Particular attention should be paid to those that have appeared in recent years, where children participate in a training simulation - they receive a starting budget and then distribute it to education, entertainment and charity. In such "cities" the child not only spends, but also increases his capital.

Those who approach learning thoroughly will be interested in special books, for example:

I. Lipsits "Amazing Adventures in the Country of Economy"
B. Schaeffer "The Dog Named Money"
E. Tonchu "Big Business for Small Children"
O. Gozman, V. Pravotorov, E. Shakhova "What is business?"

The book "Children and the First Money" (R. Potemkin, E. Kazakevich) lists 3 basic principles of teaching children financial literacy:

Safety. Start with the amount you are willing to risk. Your child's first spending should be in line with your family's traditions and rules. If you discuss money openly, the beginning will be simple and straightforward for your child.
Order. Form useful habits in children with the help of pocket money (the usual amount, on the usual day, the usual report). This will create a solid foundation for the harmonious development of future confidence and enterprise.
Confidence. Let your kids make their own pocket money decisions. Don't be afraid of mistakes. Just be attentive to all your child's money movements and reports. Help draw conclusions

It is important not only to teach your child the basics of financial literacy, but also to choose the right tools. A child who feels responsible for their own expenses and purchases will find it easier to adapt to society.

Comment on the article "How much money to give a child? Pocket money: 6 rules"

I began to give pocket money from 5.5 years old, as soon as the child learned to count, and also for the reason that the toad pressed me to buy any nonsense for the child, nonsense from my point of view, and from his apparently it was necessary cheap garbage, such as jumpers, etc. She gave somewhere 150 rubles in ...

Discussion

I looked at one psychologist, said to give pocket money from the age of 6 just like that. I don't know how correct)

I consider it completely wrong to pay for help and study. If you want to earn money, work. If you want - my car, if you want - put up the ads. Varyukha in the crowd moonlights on pocket money. A four-year-old - why? Does he go somewhere alone without his mother?

Section: Serious question (Pocket money for teenagers). But tell me, mothers of grown-up children. When you say yes, let the slightly grown-up children have sex, if only they protect themselves, then where should the children take the means of protection ...

Discussion

I would have stuck my son's brains in) I would say so: child-work-responsibility, no grandparents, but everything myself. Although, based on the words about "put me out," you are bringing up a coward who can do anything except to bear responsibility for his actions.

05/21/2018 03:54:37, passerby

Mom here recently (she is a teacher) told about funny stories at school. A 7th grade student got pregnant from a 10th grade student. All by mutual agreement and great love. But the girl is not yet 14, and the boy is already 16, which means the boy will most likely go to jail.
So it’s better to explain to the boys what condoms are for and to give money for them, than then this is the outcome.

pocket money. Leisure, hobby. Child from 10 to 13. Mothers hello! Please tell me how much pocket money you give the children? The son is 13 years old. We give "on demand" (when going to the cinema, for a walk) and sometimes just 100-200 rubles.

Discussion

My son is 12 years old, grade 5.
He eats breakfast most often at home, I give fruit to school, lunch is paid for. We take them to school.
In the morning I give 100 rubles. If there is money left, he puts it in the piggy bank. I don’t know what he’s saving for.
He also has a bank with him. map. If I am late, he waits in a cafe, and there everything is more expensive than 100 rubles.

A strange question, for an article, or what? Give as much as you can and want. well, 5 thousand every week, for example.

But you gave the money. Pocket child, parents as help. What position do you take? That’s all, now this is his For example, you expect that for pocket money your child will sometimes go to cafes with friends (where everyone pays for himself) ...

Discussion

I sent money to my father for good food and good medicine. then I found out that he was helping his sisters at the same time (and apparently, partly from my money, despite the fact that his sisters also have grown-up children). I don’t send money to my father anymore ...

Children are given a fixed amount and it is clearly agreed in advance what pocket days are NOT spent on. And in what scenario they can be spent in bulk and then wait for compensation. Other options are discussed BEFORE spending - by phone.

We help the older generation with medicines and paid services. And real money is enough and so.

And I would advise you to consciously direct your pocket money only for pocket money - namely chips and other nonsense, and if he is And what else to teach if not on pocket money? The child will not have "for life" for a long time, but his pocket money was taken from the general budget ...

Discussion

Children over 12 years old are given 200 a week, younger ones, but schoolchildren - 100. The three older ones have gone through the period of "grab all rubbish quickly" and now, in my opinion, money is being treated very reasonably. The fourth, as soon as he began to receive money and realized what it was, began to steal with terrible force, because he is always not enough. So far, the problem has not been dealt with.

The process is long. Learning will be gradual. I would give out money on a daily basis, not on weekly payments (of course, he, the cunning one, wants to increase the face value of the amount received in this way), because it only hurts. With the daily issuance of money, he learns to spend or want to postpone - every day, i.e. the practice is more frequent. It is not necessary to immediately issue a weekly amount - until he is ready for this.

And I would advise you to deliberately send pocket money only to pocket money - namely chips and other nonsense, and if he wants to buy something more solid - a magazine with stickers, DVD, etc., let him NOT save pocket money, but it will be better from family fund, give it extra. DO NOT control the spending of pocket money, this is purely money at his complete discretion, "thrown money", their purpose and task to be spent "on nonsense", so relax in advance and do not think about them.

Pocket spending is a special fund that should be directed precisely as targeted funds to satisfy his IMPULSE desires (at first it will only be food), learning how to manage impulsive desires. And for his other needs, let him have family funds for now. It is still too early for him - to save from pocket money, he needs to learn how to manage desires with the help of pocket money, but for this these means cannot be limited, i.e. if there is a resource of 150-500 rubles per week, this resource should be constant and not be "postponed" for more substantial desires. Otherwise, the child will constantly be in a "deficit", "shortage" mode of funds for his impulsive desires and will not learn to manage them, because they will not lose their sharpness. Impulsive desires lose their sharpness when they are satisfied (this is the first) and (second) only then, due to the weakening of their sharpness, it becomes possible to control these desires.

Or is pocket money evil for our children? In the sense that they are not earned and corrupted? In our family, Farukh is given 50 rubles. per week on Fridays + bonuses for A's in a trimester or a year. + dad awarded until recently for the fives in mathematics (20 p ...

Discussion

We don’t give money. We give a chance to make money.
But they are alone and do not go anywhere and without our knowledge they never buy anything. Even if there is money, they always consult with their parents.

I don’t remember exactly, but it seems that their boys were given money only for ice cream. For a long time, it was somehow not customary for children to give pocket money to children. But they had everything! When one was 16, and the other became 13 themselves A relative offered them to collect limestone for restoration in the city. My friend and my two sons slowly collected these stones. For 3 days of work a couple of hours they earned a very decent amount. The youngest went and bought himself a round aquarium and goldfish. Then they painted and something else. I don’t even know how it will be when our girl grows up. Probably we will give, but for something, and not just like that, let him deserve a deed., good study, etc. ...

From the age of 7 he gives 700 rubles a month, there were breakdowns a couple of times, they were rigidly stopped.
The Hedgehog receives 50 rubles a week on Fridays (now it happens on Saturdays when we come to the country house) and can spend (or save) them as he pleases. This has been the whole of last year. He bought toys, Lego, etc. for "his" ones. When we come to the store, there are practically no "buy" whims. Let him rely on his accumulated or looking for a cheaper analogue.

Since the Hedgehog will go to first grade, it is important for me that he read in the summer. If he doesn't read -2p a day. Again, order. By the evening, his things are scattered -2p.

We didn’t go to help in cleaning the country house for a fee. The grandmother rebelled that it was "an attempt to buy love" and "help should come from a pure heart." Well, okay. But self-service does not apply to love. Erases all its + 2p.

And memory. He teaches poetry (Gumilev, Kipling ...) voluminous and complex. I offered +5 for the poem, but the Hedgehog said that this is a lot, and he is ready to teach for three rubles. F :) But I decided to explain that if the employer is ready to pay more for the job, you should not refuse.

Lack of money will not make smoking inaccessible, but trust in parents will undermine ...
It seems to me that he wants to - all the same, the girlfriends will quietly shoot, so the main thing is to maintain a trusting relationship with my daughter. Maybe he will become older, he will also listen to the opinion of his mother ...

03/29/2001 16:47:07, Anya

Hello dear readers! I think many who have children really care about this issue. To give or not to give pocket money to a child? And if you give, how much? When to start giving and how to control it? The questions we are looking for answers. And everyone solves this problem for himself, as he can and as he thinks right.

Many parents are convinced that a child needs pocket money. This will allow him to avoid many mistakes in adulthood. Indeed, in order to learn how to manage money, plan expenses, spend and calculate the budget, you need to teach this. And how to teach if the child has never held money in his hands?

Another part of the parents is convinced of the opposite. - incompatible concepts. Why does a child need money?

Parents buy everything for them anyway
Plus, kids don't know how to spend money.
Can be pampered with money or cultivated qualities such as greed
A child who always has money is more at risk (they can be taken away from him or, worse, beaten)

In search of answers, we study the experience of other parents, the experience of foreign countries, read the advice of psychologists and all sorts of smart books, such as books by Robert Kiyosaki.

At times, I just want to say to myself: “Stop, that's enough. Stop for a minute, digest what you have learned, and apply. But apply creatively, based on your own life experience and intuition, taking into account the character and inclinations of your child. "

Agree, many of us belong to the generation brought up in a somewhat negative attitude towards money.

In our families, it was not customary to discuss any financial issues and problems with children. Parents, as a rule, did their best.

And, of course, there was no question of any financial education of children. Therefore, we, today's parents, for the most part are absolutely illiterate financially. Our parents, yes, often, and we ourselves live as God puts it on our souls.

And we dispose of the money we earn in approximately the same way as it happened in the family, as grandparents, parents or close relatives usually did.

Only now I am beginning to understand that everything in life could be organized somehow differently, with the right attitude to money.

And, for this reason alone, I think that children should know the value of money from childhood and be able to handle it.

In order for your child to become a rich and happy person, you, parents, teach him to become so, even if something did not work out for you in life and you yourself are not at all rich.

Because the point here is mainly not in your condition, but in your head and in your ability to bring up the correct attitude to money in children.

But this is just my point of view.

Let's see what psychologists think about this, and how it happens in other countries.

Germany

Stable and respectable Germany is known for its passion for economy in everything (albeit within reasonable limits, and, at the same time, the quality of life does not suffer from this at all).

Pocket money for children is welcome here from an early age.

Some parents start giving money to their children at the age of 5.

These amounts, of course, are small, but the conditions under which they are issued in some families teach children to distribute their finances. For example, a child is offered a choice of some amount of money or some amount of sweets bought for this money. In this way (either money or candy), the child begins to realize the value of money and make a choice.

I don't know if this is acceptable in our country. For me personally, this method is somehow not very good. But this is probably why we are not Germans.

German students receive an average of 5-20 euros for their expenses. But, at the same time, many parents immediately take from their children 20% of the amount issued (such a kind of tax).

This is done not because parents are so greedy and cannot part with the entire amount, but for a specific purpose: to teach children that tax must be paid on each amount of money.

In Germany, a way of earning money for children is encouraged, such as selling their toys, books and other things they no longer need at flea markets. With this money (when the necessary amount has been accumulated), some larger thing is purchased that is necessary for the child.

France

For some reason, I never thought that the French (in my opinion, somewhat frivolous in life, but, probably, I was wrong) are capable of such hoarding.

They teach their children to save money and keep financial records of income and expenses from early childhood (5-6 years). Moreover, they are fined for all sorts of children's pranks and offenses, significantly reducing the contents of the children's wallet.

French schoolchildren are given 5-30 euros a week for pocket money, and this money is seen more as a way to teach children how to handle money. And if they need to buy something more expensive, children usually earn money in their free time.

Having entered the university, many French children are completely removed from the monetary allowance of their parents (they live separately and at the expense of part-time jobs).

How I envy their parents: we will probably never come close to such a model of relations between children and their parents. And sometimes you want to.

USA

A country in which they are very serious (one might even say fanatical), and children are accustomed to working from childhood (for example, they can be paid by parents for housework or teenagers earn money by washing cars, mowing lawns, in cafes, etc.) ...

The relationship between parents and children is financially reduced to a simple scheme: parents try to save more for their old age, so as not to be a burden for their children, and therefore children must earn on their own.

American schoolchildren are given $ 5-15 for pocket expenses. Children can receive systemic education in financial literacy in special camps, where such training takes place in a playful way. Very often, American children take out loans for their studies (in whole or in part).

Sweden

In this country it is very easy for children to save money and it is not at all costly for parents.

Imagine, up to 20 years old Swedish children are paid by the state for pocket expenses - 152 dollars a month. At school, meals are free. And if the parents also “participate” in such a kind of “co-financing program”, that is, add the same amount from themselves to the amount accumulated from the state, then by the 20th anniversary the child’s account will certainly have a tidy sum.

I want to live in Sweden 🙂

And in Sweden, children also earn money by selling their unnecessary things (clothes, toys, books) and from the age of 15 they can start their own business. There are a lot of such young businessmen in the country.

Well, what I don't really like is that children in Sweden can eat sweets only on Saturdays.

England

England, as it turned out, is the most loyal country in relation to children. To be honest, I thought on the contrary, that prim and strict England has the most draconian measures in relation to children and child labor.

But this is not at all the case.

The British do not try to "load" their young children with the basics of financial literacy. Although, as a rule, in almost all families, children have piggy banks where they save money. For pocket expenses, children are given $ 8-31 weekly (depending on the age of the child).

A system of part-time jobs with parents is also practiced. And older children who earn extra money on their own sometimes lose pocket money.

And here's another interesting nuance: if children start to earn money for real and continue to live with their parents, they pay their parents 10% of their earnings (the so-called parental tax) to pay for utilities and food. And, thus, an understanding is developed: not everything that you yourself earned can be spent only on yourself.

Turkey

This country is the most pleasant and easiest way to make money for children. They receive coins (from 0.5 to 27 dollars) from infancy for kissing older relatives on major national holidays.

Schoolchildren receive $ 5.5-16 weekly for pocket money. They start earning money later than in European countries and the United States, from 15-16 years old, and continue to be under the financial tutelage of their parents.

Hungary

Her experience of financial education of children is interesting: she is taught how to handle money during the game (for example, "Monopoly") and in the classroom at school.

Pocket money - $ 12 per week.

On this issue, both domestic and foreign psychologists are unanimous. It is impossible to gain your own experience and learn how to manage money (spend, save, plan) without real money (at this stage, this is pocket money).

At what age should you give money to children?

There is no single point of view. But the majority is inclined to believe that money should be given when the child is ready for this (he himself begins to show interest in this issue, learns to count). In our country, this period usually coincides with the beginning of school.

Here everyone decides for himself. It depends on the income in the family, and on a reasonable approach.

Money should not be seen as an incentive to behave well, to get good grades, or, worse yet, to do housework, but as a means of teaching a child financial skills.

How often do you give out pocket money?

The allocated amount should be constant - for example, 50-100 rubles per week. Usually the need for pocket money arises from the beginning of school.

How to teach a child to handle money?

The child must independently dispose of these funds.

Parents, on the other hand, can advise on what to spend money on, how best to dispose of it, and unobtrusively control it. But the final decision must be made by the child. Since, with strict control over expenses on the part of parents, the whole point of pocket money is lost.

For example, you can take your child with you for. And do not be afraid that the child will spend money (in your opinion, absolutely mediocre on useless things). Any experience is the experience of the child himself. Only in this way will he learn to independently manage money.

Bye Bye…

P.S. If you don't know how to manage finances yourself, start learning with your child. It will be useful to everyone.

If your child is three years old, and he still does not know that his mother’s wallet is not rubber, it’s time to stop, exhale and explain to your blood what money is and how it gets. How to make it as clear as possible in order to avoid problems in the future, AiF.ru told psychologist Svetlana Merkulova.

Find cheaper

Natalya Kozhina, AiF.ru: Svetlana, do I need to explain to a child what money is? Personally, I do not remember such conversations in childhood, everything somehow happened by itself.

Svetlana Merkulova: In general, children in this world are always learning something. Likewise, the relationship with money, they also need to be taught. This is the task of the parents. It is important that the child knows as early as possible about this side of life, practically from birth. We teach the younger generation good manners, rules of conduct in society and safety rules. This is how we take care of the children. Learning how to deal with money is equally important. This is something that will be very useful for your child in adulthood.

- You say that you need to prepare a child from birth. What does it mean?

- Children learn first of all when they just see how we behave, what we are doing. They are watching the parents. The child goes with us to the store for groceries - you need to show him that you do not just take goods on the shelves, but you pay money for them. It's great if it is real money, and not a plastic card, which can be considered by the kid as a magic card that has unlimited credit. Cash is specific. They tend to end, and this is very visual and useful. Speak the price of the product. It is important to talk about money calmly and to the point. It is necessary to convey to the child the understanding that money has its value, and if you spend it, it disappears. You need to earn them.

In addition, in the older preschool age, children are very fond of playing in the store. Thus, you can perfectly teach your son or daughter about commodity-money relations. The beauty is that, in fact, children tell us what they need. It is important just to be attentive to their games, words and requests.

- How to explain to a child what is “expensive” and “cheap”?

- Of course, it is difficult to explain such things to a very small child 2.5-3 years old, he does not yet have the skill of comparison. But a six-year-old or a seven-year-old who can count is quite capable of understanding the difference. You can always arrange a game in the store called Find Cheaper. Ask your child to find a product at a more affordable price. This hunting game is great for building skills that will come in handy in the future.

- Don't you think that in this way we will simply raise a curmudgeon who will count every penny and search for something cheaper all his life?

- The culture of handling money is passed on from the family system. When parents are constantly living in austerity, the child copies this behavior. If you are a curmudgeon, it is foolish to be afraid that you will grow up the same curmudgeon. As for the game, I do not think that it will somehow greatly affect the child, and he will become hyper-economical. Rather, you will simply give your child some basic money-handling skills.

Speak out loud

- Another difficult question that worries almost any child, why, for example, are the Petrovs richer than his family?

- You can easily explain that there are always people who receive a large salary (even more than that of the Petrovs). But this is not because you personally are not successful, but because you work where they pay less. But at the same time, you like your work. You do it, because it is a favorite thing and you also get paid for it. If a child decides that he likes the way the Petrovs live, this can become an incentive to grow and develop. This is precisely the formation of goals.

- About the goals. Once I watched a story about first-graders, a journalist interviewed them about their future profession. Most of the answers were from the category: I want to become a beautician in order to earn a lot, I want to work in a bank, because they pay a lot, etc. Where does such an attitude come from from an early age, should it somehow bother parents?

- Such aspirations are dictated by our consumer society and, in many respects, by our family. Let's imagine that a mother goes to a beautician, gives a lot of money for the procedures, and then comes home and discusses how much these specialists earn. Children hear everything and instantly draw their conclusions. For this reason, you should always think that you are speaking out loud in front of your own children! A cosmetologist is a good profession, but it's not good because you can make money there.

As for the orientation towards material values, this is a clash of the interests of society and family values. We are all in the consumer race, only at different intensities. If it is customary in your family to worship money, then the child will follow this course. And if the family still has other values, then material wealth will not come to the fore.

- What words to choose to explain to a child that it is not easy to get money?

- This is a very relevant topic, even if we are talking about a wealthy family, where parents and children are used to actively spending. Of course, the child must understand that any money is earned by parental labor, which means that it has value. If you spend them, then by itself the wallet will not be filled with new bills. Here, again, the game will help. Think over the chain from the moment of earning toy money to the moment of spending. What do you need to do to get paid? How do you distribute the money so that you have enough? Now there are many games in which the process of earning and spending is well reflected. For example, "Monopoly" or some kind of computer games where the hero receives a salary and with the help of it acquires the necessary things.

Also, talk about some points. For example, you went to buy pantyhose, explain why you take this particular product and not another: “These tights cost so much, I like them because ...” Thus, you add a comparative analysis as well. Agree that one way or another we all spend it inside ourselves, but in this case it must be done out loud so that the child understands what you are doing and why.

On a typewriter

- Is it useful for a child to save up for something?

- Yes! It's great to buy a piggy bank for a child, because each of us has a certain dream, so why not raise money for it? This is a good reason to teach your child how to handle rubles and kopecks. You can even buy two piggy banks at once: money for a dream is added to one, and in the other is what you can spend as soon as you want - on sweets, buns, balls.

The existence of piggy banks is about learning the retention process. You know, there are people who, in principle, do not know how to handle money, spend it in a few seconds, as soon as they appear in their hands. These are the adults who, even as children, did not learn to save. But in vain!

- Who can give money to a child, on what basis? Let's say, just for a birthday or on some holidays? And most importantly, how to avoid situations when the child begins to wait, for example, not for grandparents, but for what they will bring or give?

- Usually, such a bias is observed in families where one single child is growing up, whom everyone had been waiting for for a very long time, and when he finally appeared, they began to load him with everything they could. This is definitely a manifestation of love that people cannot control. Alas, in this way they just spoil the child. Gradually, the value of the fact that grandparents came to visit, with whom it is fun and healthy, is pushed aside, money, a thing, a toy come to the fore. The child from the doorway greets you with the phrase: “What did you bring?”. Commodity-money relations are formed in the family. In fact, everything is simple: you don't have to shove money every time you come, use some reason for this.

- Is your birthday a good occasion?

- Not! After all, this is a holiday, children are waiting for some kind of magic. Yes, adults may think the best gift is money. The child (if you have not spoiled him yet) thinks in completely different categories. Better find out what he wants and bring this particular gift. February 23, March 8, name days are quite suitable for giving money.

- How much money can you give?

- A little, it should be a symbolic amount. You can give it to your child in person or put it in a piggy bank.

- Is it possible to reward a child with money for something?

- Of course, teaching a child to make money is useful. In this case, it would be great to find something in the family that everyone doesn't like. For example, to wash the dishes, and the one who is ready to wash it, gets 10 rubles. It doesn't matter who does it - mom, dad or child. Thus, you teach your child to earn. Encouraging study with money is not a good idea. Going to school is natural, no one gets paid for it.

- If we talk about pocket expenses, at what age should the child have this money?

- Six - seven years when the child starts going to school. At the same time, you do not need to control how your child spends the given amount. Gradually, the student will learn to manage it, count change, save money, etc. By the age of 12, you can give money not every day, but every three to four days, so that gradually the child can control his expenses for three days. For senior pupils - once a week, once every 2 weeks. This is how children learn to handle their capital. This prepares the person for a future in which most people are paid once a month.

- What expenses should be taken into account in order to understand the size of pocket expenses?

- Food, meals, travel. See how the child's day works, what he needs. If you give the amount more, then, most likely, he will spend it on all sorts of nonsense.

Mom is on the hook

- Svetlana, where do children come from who like to throw tantrums in the store, demand from their parents to buy a toy, candy, dress, etc.?

- They are created by parents, children - our product. If mom and dad recklessly respond to any "want" every time, get ready for the fact that gradually more will be demanded of you. By your actions, you seduce the child, as if telling him: "I can buy you everything, please take it." To prevent such things from happening, it's still better to establish certain rules: once a month (select your period), parents buy some kind of beautiful dress or the right toy. The child will get used to it and will stop demanding.

- What do you propose to do when a child starts hysterical over a toy right in the store, not to pay attention to him?

- You need to act depending on the age and, let's say, the degree of neglect of the case. Tantrums in the store occur for a reason. If a small child was capricious, they calmed him down, giving what he demanded, it will be harder further. The problem needs to be solved even with the baby, so that he does not have the habit of “shouting and getting”. But if mom is anxious and quickly tries to give her child anything she wants, so long as he does not yell, she is on his hook!

- Let's take the conscious age of the child and the average family. The daughter asks her mother to buy her a Louis Vuitton bag or any other expensive thing, what should I do?

- There is a piggy bank for any large-scale purchase. Please save for your dream bag.

- I am afraid that in an average family she will save up to old age.

- It's okay if a person is faced with a situation in which he does not save up for an expensive bag. In this world, not everything is possible to receive. Sooner or later, many of us are faced with some kind of limitations. Those children who have learned to cope with them at a young age, calmly accept them in adulthood. Yes, there are things that are not available to everyone! Sometimes the child must come across the word "no." Nothing catastrophic will happen. Parents are not gods. They don't have to spend five salaries just because their daughter wants a bag.

- How to teach a child to spend money correctly when he comes to the store?

- Only with the help of experiments, and real ones. For example, a child comes to a store with a thousand rubles accumulated. He wants ice cream, candy, a toy, a bicycle. Calculate with him: this one costs 300 rubles, this one costs 500 rubles, and this one costs 600 rubles. Do you think we fit into your thousand or not? The child will count and say: "No, we don't fit." Then invite him to choose something from his "want". Just don’t have to report money.

- And if he, without asking you, starts spending money on all sorts of nonsense, you need to stop him?

- Not. He must face the fact that his pockets are empty, he, conditionally, bought a mountain of gum, but was left without a typewriter. Of course, he will surely grieve about this. Nothing wrong! Empathize: “I’m really sorry that this happened, but the next time you have money, you’ll probably use it more wisely.” It is very important for a child to face restrictions and understand that money disappears, and in order for it to appear in the wallet again, you need to earn it.

- Svetlana, is it necessary to give the child the opportunity to earn money or force him to do this?

- If the family has a need for money, as a rule, children themselves show such an initiative. Of course, it is important to support the child in his endeavors, to give him the opportunity to earn money and spend it on his needs. By buying himself what he wants, the child helps you, because you will not need to buy it. If he buys you a cake with his first paycheck, that's a very good sign. But if not, that's okay. The only thing you shouldn't do is run ahead of the locomotive and quickly look for your child for work. You can only help him choose several reliable options, and the child will already make his choice.

- Do I need to devote the child to the family budget? Should he be aware of how much money there is in the family, what and how you spend it, or is all this extra information?

- For an adult child who handles numbers and amounts well (from 12 years old), you can tell what percentage you allocate each month for food, clothing, education, utility bills. These are different items of expenditure that he has the right to know about, and it would be useful for him. But, again, this should not be a boring lecture, tell in the process: we have such and such an amount, we spend this there, this is there, and this is there. This is a step into adulthood, for which he must be ready.

At what age to start talking with a child about money and how to teach how to properly handle it? Do I need to give my children pocket money? Is it worth paying for chores or homework? Should the child be initiated into the financial problems of the family? We talk about this with psychologist Elena Dubovik

- When do children begin to understand the essence of money?

For toddlers, money is an abstract thing. At the age of 5-7 years, the child is already able to understand where the banknotes in the wallet come from from the parents. That mom and dad go to work and get them for their work, that money is the equivalent of goods and services. And schoolchildren should be able to spend them competently. Take children 5-6 years old with you to the store for shopping. Show how to choose products, teach you to understand the prices: which is acceptable and which is high, which product is needed now, and what can be bought next time.

- Many families give out to their children for pocket money. In your opinion, is it necessary?

Necessarily. From the age of six, a child should have pocket money. So he learns to dispose of them. It must be a certain amount. What will it be? Decide for yourself based on your income, but not very big. Money allocated for school meals should not be confused with pocket money. The latter are intended for small expenses: eat ice cream, go to the cinema, buy a small toy, a magazine ... Give out pocket money once a week on the agreed day.

- And if grandparents want to give their grandchildren a “couple of coins”?

They can give, but with parental consent. Without him, or even without the knowledge of mom and dad, this is a violation of the family hierarchy, parental authority. You need to know how much the child receives from grandparents, whether the amount is commensurate. It is quite possible to refuse such financial assistance. And grandparents should not be offended, because you are raising a child, not them.

- Should you require a full expense report?

Pocket money is a sign of respect and freedom. So let the child dispose of them in his own way. Even if you see that he, having received the money, releases everything immediately, you do not need to take control of expenses and allocate money in parts. Explain that spending everything in one go will leave him without finance for a week. Gradually, the child will develop a shopping strategy. The task of parents is not to control, but to raise a person who knows how to manage his life and any of its resources, including money.

- Is it possible to give money to children for their birthday?

It depends on how old the child is. A teenager can. Small children are best served with gifts. If you have doubts about choosing a presentation, go to the store together.

- There are parents who stimulate the success of their children with money.

I do not support this trend. All the cases that I encountered in practice did not bring the desired result: neither the academic performance has improved, nor the relationship in the family. Maybe the child has no ability for some subject, and thus you require good grades. He suffers from it. The fear of upsetting, making mistakes, being bad or unworthy, difficulties in mastering the school curriculum fall like a snowball on the child - and problems with learning begin. In general, children learn well out of cognitive interest. It also needs to be supported.

- How to treat the fact that parents pay their children for housework?

And who will pay him for cleaning the room or washing the dishes when he becomes an adult? The child receives money only because he must learn how to manage it and have a certain degree of freedom. In fact, the child himself wants to help his parents. In this case, there must be a different motivation. I put things in order in the room, not because my mother will give the money, but because after cleaning it will be clean and fresh. The child receives aesthetic pleasure, moral satisfaction: here I am, I did it myself. Parents who pay for homework are rather insecure: they are not an authority for their child, their words mean nothing to him.

- Is it possible to use financial levers in education at all?

The issuance of pocket money should not be canceled as a punishment, and their amount should not depend on behavior and assessments.

- The teenager decided to earn extra money in the summer ...

You should not stop him, even when the house is a full bowl. Discuss possible employment options together. Such an experience will be useful: he will feel more adult, independent, he will understand that money does not come just like that. Just do not encroach on all the funds received, do not try to withdraw them and invest in the family budget. Let your child feel the joy of hard earned money.

- Do I need to devote the child to the financial problems of the family?

This is not worth doing. Adults discuss simple financial issues with children, but do not shift painful problems onto children's shoulders! If you cannot deal with them, how will the child do it? The task of the elders is to provide the family with a livelihood. If a child says, “We have no money, I’ll go to work,” this is a bad sign. This means that you are not the leader in the family, but the child wants to become one.

- Should specially trained people teach how to handle money?

This is the prerogative of the parents. You can play with the kids in the store. Dad or mom will be the seller, and the child will be the buyer, or vice versa. The role of the store owner and customer is a good way to help children learn more about money. In addition, you can teach your child financial literacy through board games such as "Monopoly". But before you give your child a lecture on finance, think about how you, the parents, approach to money. Whether you have enough before your paycheck, whether you live within your means, or are in silly debt, spend on things you don't need, or save up. Agree, it will be difficult to teach a child how important it is to save, spend money wisely, if you yourself do not know how to do it. After all, children, willingly or unwillingly, take an example from adults.

And how are they?

Germans begin to acquaint the child with the world of finance early - from the age of five. On average, a local student receives 5-20 euros per week for his expenses. But at the same time, parents can take back 20 percent of the amount of pocket money. This is how they teach children to tax.

British their children are given an average of 5-10 pounds a week, and a teenager - 20. From the age of 14, many young Englishmen begin to work as babysitters and receive from 3.5 to 5 pounds an hour for this. And their parents stop giving them money. When children start earning money while staying with their elders, they have to pay the so-called parental fee - 10 percent of the salary.

Turks the first lira pocket money is received for kisses. On big national holidays, it is customary to give money to all children, even if it is 1-2 lira. While the child is small, they stay with their parents. They take him to the store to buy something with them. And little Turks regularly start receiving pocket money as soon as they go to school. As a rule, 10-30 liras are given for a week.

Young Swedes pocket money is given by ... the state. Up to 16 years old, they are paid 1.050 kroons a month. True, parents receive this money until they come of age. Some of this money is paid to their children "on the pocket". On average, young Swedes from 6-7 years old receive 20-45 kroons per week, and the older ones - about 100. Interestingly, children do not have to spend money at school. School meals are free, and nothing is sold in or around the school.

At what age is it worth giving money to children, how dangerous is the game "Monopoly" and is it possible to borrow from your own child? About this and not only a conversation with family psychologist Andrei Turovets.

In Germany, the issue of pocket money is resolved at the legislative level: parents must give their child from 50 cents to 25 euros per week (depending on age). We have different points of view on this matter. So should the child have their own funds or not? At what age should you get used to money?

- I think the child should be allocated a certain amount for personal expenses. Thus, from an early age, he learns to manage money wisely. What is the most suitable age? There is no definite answer to this question. As a rule, children mature to pocket money, that is, they begin to think logically, by the age of 6-8. But this does not mean at all that it is in this period that the right moment comes. It all depends on the individual characteristics of the child. It often happens that a first grader is better at managing finances than a 13-year-old. The ability to count money does not just happen. Children need to be instilled with financial literacy: not only to play with them in the store, but also to comment on every grocery trip.

How to teach a child to control expenses? For example, his parents gave him 10 rubles for a week, and he spent it in one day ...

Nobody is born a financial genius. At first, children can let everything down - you need to be ready for this. Spent all 10 rubles? Explain that this was his weekly salary. This means that on the other days you will have to do without money. After a while, issue the same amount and ask, for example, to go to the store and bring change. Explain to your child what you expect from him. If he does not fulfill the contract, take a break, do not give money. Do this until the student learns to control the budget and understands that sooner or later the money will run out.

- Is it true that children copy their parents' model of financial behavior?

This is true. Unfortunately, adults also lack financial literacy. Some people spontaneously spend all their savings in the store, and then borrow from friends. Not the best option when all the money is with one of the parents, and the other has to beg for this or that amount for personal needs. The child, observing what is happening, learns distorted financial-role behavior.

A classmate offered my son 30 kopecks for help in tying his shoelaces. The deal took place, I am in a panic: how can relations with peers be transferred to a commercial track?

Children read the model of behavior from cartoons, movies, computer games. So, in the latter, coins fall out for certain actions, for passing the level, players receive rewards ... Hence the thought: why not tie shoelaces for money? Perhaps in the 1980s, parents would have been happy: the child earned the first money. But today we understand that it is wrong to transfer everything to a commercial basis, this will negate normal human relations. When a child provides small services for a fee, there is a risk that in the future he will convert any assistance in cash. Therefore, parents should have a heart-to-heart talk with him - sort out on the shelves what you can earn on, and what should be done disinterestedly.

The board game "Monopoly" is still popular. Is it useful, does it teach financial literacy?

The game originated at the time of the US economic crisis in the 1930s. It was not accidental that it appeared in the entertainment market. People needed to give the illusion that anyone has the opportunity to make huge amounts of money. It looked like this: half-starved families in the evenings sat down at the table, played "Monopoly", tossing non-existent capital. Few fans of such entertainment actually managed to get rich. Undoubtedly, one cannot deny a certain benefit of "Monopoly" - it develops logic. But approximately the same effect can be obtained by playing chess.

Is it worth scolding a child for selling his unnecessary toys via the Internet and buying new things for this money?

There is nothing wrong with that. This approach teaches you to be frugal, to healthy forms of exchange: to get rid of the excess and acquire the necessary. It is part of the modern economy. Another thing is when a child is ready to sell at a higher price his beloved teddy bear, to which he is emotionally attached. Here we can talk about personal deformation.

- Some parents pay their children for cleaning the apartment, good studies ... Is this correct?

Household responsibilities are a contribution to the common family business. Such work should not be measured in money. Mom doesn't get a bonus for cooking dinner, and dad doesn't get a bonus for washing dishes. If you want to raise an entrepreneur from a child, stimulate him financially for public affairs, helping an outsider. Many dads take boys to work, give them assignments, pay something like a salary. Not a bad option, too.

As for attempts to stimulate interest in studies or classes in circles and sections with the help of money, then, in my opinion, this is a road to nowhere. As practice shows, this scheme either does not work at all, or does not work for long. Monetary motivation is short-term, more important is the child's sincere desire to do something.

We often teach children to buy only useful things - what they need. Should they be encouraged to spend money in order to surprise someone?

A person who buys only necessary products, things, is somewhat limited in financial thinking. He cannot afford something interesting and enjoyable. I watched many times: parents with small children go to the store and say that there is no money. This is how the idea of financial poverty is formed. Often, guys with such a set of beliefs, as adults, live very modestly. The task of parents is to look for a middle ground, to explain how much money is, what needs to be bought, why now it is necessary to buy not a toy, but another thing. Moreover, such conversations are best done not in the store, but at home.

Children often manage to save up a significant amount of money. To prevent capital from going nowhere, parents begin to indicate where the funds should be spent. Is such total control necessary?

The child has the right to manage finances at his own discretion. Parents should not step in and tell him what to buy. There is a risk of losing confidence. One more point - this behavior can lead to distortions when the child becomes an adult and he has his own family. Conflicts are possible between spouses over spending money, it will be customary to look into each other's wallet. It's another matter if you want to suggest how to plan your budget more wisely. For example, you want to spend everything on sweets, but keep in mind that in a couple of months you may have a desire to buy something substantial, but you will no longer have the funds. Save up for a bike or a tablet - well done. But do not forget that sometimes you need to collect more than expected, because the cost of equipment often changes. The child must understand what each decision is fraught with. And if he relies solely on his own opinion, then he will also bear the financial risks on his own.

Adults often borrow from their children. Do I need to return the money if it goes, say, to pay for school lunches?