How to be liberated c. How to be liberated if you are painfully shy. Beliefs associated with the formation of fear
Woman in bed- it already sounds tempting and sexy. Samantha Bishez- a regular correspondent of the most respected magazine for men MAXIM. She is sure that a woman can fully enjoy a man and intimacy only if she tries to relax in bed. In our article we will consider the most effective ways that will make your intimate life bright, varied and will help you. Help your beloved to open the soul, relax the body and release the hot tigress to freedom.
Lingerie woven from debauchery
Panties and bras decide everything, they can drive you crazy, give a girl confidence in herself and even liberate her partner, because a man in love can also act uncertainly for the first time. Complexes interfere with choosing depraved underwear for a girl. She is afraid that the guy will consider her vulgar or cheeky and opts for classic cotton panties. It is enough to change the usual underwear for sexy, and self-esteem will skyrocket.
How a man can help: so, give her a set of the most shameless underwear. Just do it wisely. First, make sure that you have a long relationship with your beloved and she trusts you, otherwise you will only push her away.
Incinerating passion
Do not wait until you want unrestrained sex, awaken passion in yourself, inflame your body to the limit. Perhaps you think that talking about the most interesting and porn films will help her want you. However, things are not so simple for girls and what suits you does not suit them. Women are not audials or visuals, they are kinesthetic, which means that touch will help them ignite the fire, and very, very much. To relax in bed, you must first take a shower with a sensual shower gel (for example, with patchouli and ylang-ylang oils) and begin to gently caress yourself all over the body, leaving the most secret places for dessert.
How a man can help: while the girl is basking in the shower, cheer up! Being asleep will not be good for your sex. She will soon come out to you and want to see a male who is about to pounce on, and not a tired man, peacefully sniffing on the pillow.
Top quality oral sex
For any man, oral sex is an unreal pleasure. This type of sex can liberate even the most shy partner. For a man to moan with pleasure, you need to find an approach to him and pay special attention to the organ of his pride. Unfortunately, this is impossible without errors. The main rule is not to cause unpleasant sensations and to introduce experiments gradually. A girl should try and change the technique in the process, get pleasure herself and observe the reaction of her beloved.
How a man can help: to liberate a girl in bed, she needs to be constantly praised and encouraged. Only in this way will she be able to fully open up and surrender herself to feeling. Do not be silent when it hurts or is unpleasant. Just guide it with your hand, gently stroking your hair and neck.
Without unnecessary body movements
Men sometimes really lack impetuous sex, but they understand that in order to be liberated in bed, a girl needs to give the lion's share of caresses and tender words, and sometimes they do not want to wait so much. If possible, try to have sex quickly, pulling your pants down and aggressively doing your thing. Sometimes women really want it, but are afraid to admit it. If you act quickly, confidently, and at the same time accurately, she will appreciate it.
How a man can help: a woman will not be able to truly relax in bed if you suppress her initiative. As soon as she starts pestering in a rather extreme place, do not pretend to be a puritan, but pick up the idea.
Girl + girl
What can certainly liberate a girl in bed is experimenting with her own kind. Girls know what the female sex needs and how to do it in order to be good. For those who have a lot of prohibitions in their heads, it is worth trying to diversify their sex life with an artificial object. And if you've tried everything you can, have a threesome. Only for this you should not choose your permanent partner.
How a man can help: pay enough attention to each of the girls and remember to change condoms before each intercourse.
Tough as in the middle ages
Your girlfriend may enjoy spanking and aggressive sex. But here it is important not to overdo it, so that it does not cause a backlash. Medieval punishments are exciting and help you to become more liberated.
How a man can help: make it easier for your loved one and begin to show your masculine essence yourself. After all, inside every man lives an indomitable male who is ready to possess his lady without a trace. Start little by little, and if you hear groans of pleasure, make the game even harder. But do not insist, if the girl does not want this, perhaps she will look "50 shades of grey" and herself will offer to be used.
In many cases, the success of family life depends on the quality of sex. However, many girls are ashamed of themselves and do not know how to relax in bed. The openness of the chosen one will give the man a lot of pleasure, which will undoubtedly affect the lady herself.
Where do the complexes come from?
Psychologists believe that sexual stiffness has its origins in the last century. In the USSR, there were plenty of slogans aimed at condemning sex, as well as recognizing any actions of an erotic nature as vicious. So, ignorance (and sometimes fear) of your body leads to the emergence of self-doubt, and as a result - complexes.
An important reason for the emergence of complexes is the dissemination of a sort of "ideal of beauty" by the media. On television, they show tall, overly thin girls who have small breasts and narrow hips. A woman, undressing in front of a man, worries about the inadequacy of the standard. This stimulates the emergence of complexes in the future.
However, the experiences of many of the fair sex are in vain, and their thoughts on how to relax in bed and stop being shy are superfluous. According to the research of specialists, the majority of men prefer "curvy" forms like an hourglass.
What a girl is ashamed of in bed: 3 main points
To answer the question of how a woman can be liberated in bed, one should consider the reasons for her embarrassment. There are 3 main points that the girl is shy about:
- Your body. A lady who is ashamed of her body usually does not agree to intimacy in the light. And even if the chosen one received her consent, then intercourse takes place under the covers, and the lady asks not to look at her.
- Diminishing dignity. It seems to the fair sex that her appearance is far from ideal, she complains that she looks bad, emphasizes her shortcomings. In response to the compliments from the man, the girl denies them, focusing on her own flaws.
- Fear of dialogue. There are ladies who are not only ashamed of their bodies or behavior in sex, but are also afraid to talk to a man about this topic. Such girls do not enter into dialogue with the chosen one and do not ask what he would like to change in their sex life.
Sexual misunderstanding
Girls often face feelings such as shyness or self-doubt. If you have ever thought about this, then you need to find the problem and come to the right solution. As a rule, men prefer modest women to dissolute women for marriage. And in bed they want to see a relaxed and untamed tigress. And then they say that they do not like sex, after which there are problems of mutual understanding in intimate life. Because of this, complexes and a feeling of inferiority can develop against the background of the fact that a girl cannot satisfy her chosen one. But how can a girl relax in bed so that she always feels desired and loved?
What does shyness in bed lead to?
First you need to understand that no one in the world is perfect, any person has flaws. The media are actively promoting girls of model appearance. Based on this, the average woman infringes upon herself by comparing with fashion models. Because of this, complexes are formed, which in most cases can only be overcome with the support of a beloved man.
Women often say, "I'm ashamed to be free in bed." But if you think about it, such girls deprive themselves of getting the maximum pleasure during intercourse due to excessive modesty. To feel confident in an intimate life, you need a reliable man who will gladly support all your endeavors. It is with such a person that a woman will be able to overcome her fears and self-doubt.
Sex is often called "conjugal duty" when it comes to married women. It must be remembered that physical intimacy does not have to be an obligation, as is often the case. You should not allow situations when a woman is indifferent to having sex with her beloved man.
Improving self-esteem
If a man chose a girl, then she became for him the most desirable, beautiful and sexy. Sex is an important part of both relationships and marriage. Finding a place for constraint and embarrassment in bed, a lady of the heart can push her husband away. This often leads to infidelity and marriage breakdown.
The fair sex needs to understand whether she really loves her man and wants to make him happy. If the answer is yes, then you should learn to work on yourself. Sports can help eliminate the feeling of unattractiveness. Thanks to fitness, the body will become fit and sexy, which will increase the girl's self-esteem. Inaction is always easier than finding the strength to work on yourself.
Working on your own image
Wearing your favorite clothes also makes you feel welcome. You need to have several dresses in your wardrobe that are perfect for your figure. This approach will make any girl irresistible in the eyes of her man.
The following practice also helps. You need to stand in front of a mirror in the nude and carefully examine your body. After that, you should start posing and identify the strengths of your body. You can also imagine that posing is taking place in front of a man, and the main purpose of this action is to excite the observer. The mirror also helps you see your flaws that you don't need to dwell on. But it is advisable to work on the problem areas of your body.
A few glasses of wine or champagne will help completely shy women who do not know how to relax in bed with a man. A person under the influence of alcohol is less constrained. A relaxing drink will help you completely and completely immerse yourself in the atmosphere of the world of sex and find confidence in yourself, and the question of how to relax with your loved one in bed will disappear by itself.
Positive thinking
Scientists have proven that human thoughts are material. It is recommended to develop the attitude "I am sexy" or "I am desirable". All previous attitudes of their lack of sexuality will eventually disappear. Working on your thoughts is important and requires special attention. As a rule, people themselves build problems in their heads, trying to find reasons to justify their thoughts.
Immersion in the intimate world
The beginning of changing yourself sexually will be setting a goal to fulfill the desired direction in sex. You need to choose a role for yourself, which you should adhere to during the month. Undoubtedly, this will help to get an answer to the question of how to relax in bed.
At the end of this month, you need to gradually move on to something new, mastering those areas in sex that are really interesting. It will not be superfluous to ask your man what he would like to see an intimate character. As a rule, men rarely hide their desires in sex. This can serve as a motivation on the path to excellence in intimate life.
Trust in a loved one
Trust in your partner is an important part of any relationship. Girls may strive to become better in bed, but are afraid to make mistakes. This puzzles them. You need to convey to your man and let him know. Any guy will support the girl's initiative, and in case of possible failures, he will provide support and give practical advice in endeavors.
Perfume
Don't forget about the aromas. Men’s perfume often turns girls on. It works the other way too. The stronger sex, having felt the delicate and sophisticated aroma from his chosen one, will undoubtedly show his admiration. There are also scented candles that can be used during a romantic evening.
Acknowledging your desires
There are sex forums on the Internet where people share their experiences. Reading someone's story about sex and remembering your desires can make them seem less vulgar. If you want something new in sex, but are afraid to offer it to your partner, you need to ask the question: "Why should I give up my desire?" Without admitting it, you cannot get the sex you want.
Sexy lingerie
Do not forget about underwear and bedding. A girl with lace in a bikini area always looks more sexy and desirable. You can buy an erotic kit in a specialized store, and then start acting. A place for love joys, undoubtedly, should be convenient and comfortable. A silk sheet would be ideal.
Intimate talk"
You also need to understand that a girl's shyness is not only her problem. In pairs, it is customary to solve all issues together, as a whole. You should ask your man to help find a solution and answer the question of how to relax in bed. After all, the support of a loving guy in all endeavors will help you easily overcome fears and complexes.
Dancing
A loving guy often does not notice the girl's shortcomings, and if he is with her, then she suits him the way he is. However, if a representative of the fair sex decided to overcome insecurity on her own and feel more sexy, then a good solution would be to sign up for strip plastic lessons.
This type of activity, which involves a relaxed dance, will undoubtedly help get rid of complexes. The body will become more flexible, allowing you to open up new opportunities in your sex life.
Instead of a conclusion
Sex is, first of all, a tool for freeing partners from negative emotions. Some moan during intercourse or, for example, after a passionate kiss. You don't have to be afraid to do what is enjoyable. The more clearly you express your emotions, the more motivation a man will have to please his chosen one. There should be no room for constraint and stiffness in bed.
You need to give yourself completely to your partner and get a mutual reaction. Let sex be filled with passion, and the question of how to relax in bed will forever remain in the past. You need to take everything from life and not set yourself any limits and prohibitions.
According to statistics, 47% of women are dissatisfied with their figure, 20% with their skin, 15% with their hair. Most are embarrassed to appear in front of a man in the nude and are afraid to be liberated in bed. But tightness interferes with enjoying sex not only for us, but also for the partner.
A rare woman can proudly say that she has never been ashamed of her body and that she loves it the way it is. Problems, as a rule, are the same for everyone: breasts of imperfect shape, excess weight, cellulite, stretch marks, freckles and other minor (often contrived) flaws. And if we somehow restrain our complexes with ourselves, then when we are left alone with a man, they intensify a hundred times.
Where do the complexes come from?
According to psychologists, much of the blame for our insecurity in bed lies with stereotypes - both behavior and appearance.
Our Soviet past with the slogans "Decent women don't need this" and "There is no sex in the USSR" put an end to bodily and emotional relaxedness. From childhood, we were taught to treat sex as something vicious. Hence - ignorance (or even fear) of one's own body and subconscious fear of condemnation - for imperfection, for too bold and unusual desires. In an attempt to avoid it, many believe that it is safer to "endure and be silent" in bed.
Appearance stereotypes also play an important role in the rooting of complexes. Glossy magazines, television, cinema impose on us beauty standards, not meeting which, we consider ourselves inferior, ugly, unable to arouse desire. Now the canon of beauty is considered to be runway models - tall, excessive thinness, small breasts and narrow hips. Women, undressing, feel insecure and tense, fearing that a man will notice that they do not meet the standard.
However, according to statistics, most men prefer rather curvaceous forms, an hourglass figure, to model thinness. The same statistics indicate that a man generally does not focus on the female figure when it comes to bed. If you happen to be there, it means that he has already rated you with the highest score. Therefore, you should not dwell on appearance. Ideal body parameters are not at all a guarantee of perfect sex. Learn to love your body as it is, with all its imperfections. Only then is there an opportunity to truly relax. There are many ways to achieve harmony with yourself and your body. The main thing is to find yours.
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Defeating insecurity
To learn how to feel comfortable without clothes and stop being afraid of your body in bed, use these tricks.
Tanned skin looks firmer and sexier than pale skin. Use a self-tanner as a "body sculptor". Cover your entire body with it, and after a day, apply another layer on the areas you want to visually thin, such as the inner thighs. Any cream or body oil with a radiant effect can hide imperfections. By reflecting light, they make the skin look smoother and more even.
Adjust the shape with accessories. Expose first the part of your body that you think is attractive. Better to decorate it, for example, put on bracelets if you have beautiful hands. Accentuate a long neck with a string of beads, or stay in stockings if you have shapely legs. Stay undressed in high heels. The legs will appear longer in them.
Light candles or throw a loose cloth over the lamp. Soft, diffused light will present the figure at its best.
Get a massage. Massage yourself or ask someone. Close your eyes, breathe deeply, concentrate on your feelings. Your body will learn to relax, and you will learn to love yourself and take care of yourself.
Move. Running, swimming, aerobics, yoga - the type of activity is not important. Play sports not for a specific purpose, but to realize the pleasure that movement can bring.
Home training
Feel your body, overcome complexes and tune yourself to enjoyment simple exercises will also help.
Lie on the floor and feel the horizontal surface of each part of your body. Pay attention to the "hard-to-feel" places. Try to "breathe" into these points, fill them with energy. Test yourself for inner freedom - take the position of the "star". It is usually difficult for many to leave the groin area open on the first attempt. By how free you feel like a "star", you can determine how much you allow yourself to be free at all.
Dance "Body Jazz". Try to twist, move your head. Then, one by one, include in the dance the shoulders, elbows, forearms, hands, then the body, the pelvic area, after - the knees, feet, until the whole body comes into motion. Move freely as you like, making the most of the space. It is desirable that all parts of the body participate harmoniously and evenly in the dance. New variants of movements release from stiffness, develop sensuality.
It is generally accepted that modesty is one of the main human virtues. People appreciate it when their interlocutor, when communicating, shows such qualities as courtesy, tact, gentleness. At the same time, it very often happens that you would be happy to demonstrate all this, but this is hindered by some kind of internal stopper, which prevents you from doing this. Your consciousness simply does not want to go beyond the framework that your upbringing has imposed on it. Watching how liberated people quickly gain love and authority in any company, you dream of learning how to behave in the same way, but how to become liberated? How to teach yourself to be relaxed?
As in any other business, in emancipation, you also need to have a sense of proportion. On the one hand, a girl who can be relaxed, easy-going and communicative and who knows how to "light up" in a company very quickly gets sympathy for herself. The other side of emancipation can be rudeness, bitchiness. In addition to antipathy in her address, such a girl will not achieve anything.
In any company, the first impression of a person is based on their appearance.
It is unlikely that someone will consider you relaxed if you are dressed deliberately strictly or, on the contrary, carelessly and even ridiculous. If you come to a party in a super short skirt and a blouse with a deep neckline, and when you meet you start to sit down on everyone's knees, you will be perceived not as a relaxed person, but as a slutty woman devoid of elementary self-respect.
Your appearance should be appropriate for your surroundings. You can look flirtatious, but it is very important not to cross the fine line and not just look vulgar. Try to look natural while emphasizing your inherent femininity and beauty.
Having dealt with external view, we will try to find out how to become liberated internally If you are having problems with this, then you will have to seriously work on yourself. Even the most beautiful girl who is afraid, constantly embarrassed and withdrawn into herself, evokes negative emotions towards herself. It is possible that some people like these qualities in girls, but if you behave in the same way at the second and at all subsequent meetings, their interest in you will cool off pretty quickly.
What prevents a person from feeling liberated? As a rule, it's all to blame fear... First of all, the fear of being misunderstood, or, even worse, the fear of appearing ridiculous and ridiculous. This fear can also be caused by the fear of being rejected.
In no case do not let your fears get the best of you, because this threatens that you will spend your whole life alone.
Try to step over them, and if you succeed, you can truly become liberated.
Absolutely all people make mistakes, and there is nothing wrong with that. On the contrary, the mistakes we make allow us to acquire life experience. Each person has such moments that he is ashamed to even remember, but after a few years such cases begin to seem nothing more than funny, and the maximum that they can make you smile is.
Accept that no one is immune to mistakes.
Of course, in life you will not succeed in everything that you have in mind, but it is not worth it that you lose your presence of mind. Know how to program yourself to win.
A very simple way to deal with your fear and embarrassment is smile... Try to make yourself laugh in a difficult situation, and nothing will be left of your fear. You will grow taller than him and feel more confident.
Thus, in order to become liberated, you just need to believe in yourself and put aside all your fears.
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