The most beautiful pregnancy statuses for expectant mothers! Statuses about pregnancy for social networks

Best pregnancy statuses on Statuses-Tut.ru! The most beautiful moment in a woman's life can be considered the moment when she finds out that she is pregnant. And if the child is long-awaited, then the joy is doubled. This well-known phrase “You will have a child” turns the minds of both women and her men. Some of the superstitions hide their interesting position, but there are those, and they are the majority, who gladly tell everyone close about it. Just choose beautiful statuses about pregnancy and post it on your VKontakte or Odnoklassniki page. Very often, pregnancy is perceived as a heavy burden, both literally and figuratively. Some trips to the doctor are worth it! And these problems with weight, unstable hormonal levels, swelling, heaviness in the legs, frequent mood swings. And there are legends about the taste preferences of expectant mothers. Tears for any reason! But real men endure all the whims of a pregnant wife. What can you do, such is nature! If your beloved wife is pregnant, post cool pregnancy statuses on your social media page! Be patient, it's only for nine months!

Interesting quotes about pregnancy with a second child!

Deciding to have a second child today is not easy. Not every family is ready for new moral and material expenses. They can be understood. And there are such mothers and fathers for whom the appearance of a second and even third baby is a great happiness. Children should always be welcome, especially if you've been waiting for a second child for so long. Statuses about pregnancy with a second child are interesting quotes for future parents about new opportunities and achievements in their loving family. You and your husband came to see a doctor, today you will know exactly the gender of your child. You are in anticipation, of course, you already have two beautiful sons, now you definitely should have a daughter. Mom's helper, dad's beauty, grandmother's clever, grandfather's baby. And now the moment of truth! Girl, baby, baby! Go to Statuses-Tut.ru and choose statuses about pregnancy as a girl, let all your relatives and friends know that dreams come true!

Statuses about pregnancy by a son from a beloved man!

Future parents are often asked a tricky question: “Who do you want more, a boy or a girl?” And we have to get out - we don't care if it's a boy, next time we'll go for a girl, the child's health is more important, the girl is fine too. But everyone knows that if the first child in the family, then for most men it should be a boy. For a mother, the gender of the baby is often not important; for her, the health of the child is a priority in the first place. And what difference does it make who is born. The main thing is that this child is from a beloved man! If you and your husband know for sure that you will have a boy, statuses about pregnancy with a son are for you. Go to Statuses-Tut.ru and choose the most touching quotes about pregnancy as a boy.

A Catholic woman is allowed to avoid pregnancy only by using arithmetic, astrology and logic, although there remains a complete taboo on physics, astronomy and chemistry. — Henry Mencken

In the beginning, you will ascend, and you will soar in the clouds in the seventh heaven, basking and dreaming. After nine months, a slow fall to the sinful and stone earth awaits you. – Mikhail Mamchich

Many cause nausea, to the point of vomiting. Got pregnant - and your nausea is only from one. – Evgeny Khankin

Tights that test for pregnancy. Two stripes - echoes joyfully send us.

A man is naturally afraid of pregnancy. Kindergarten in men also causes allergies, urgent matters and wild fear. – A. Ivanov

It is impossible to be pregnant for a gram, as well as a hundred percent sure.

The production of a full-fledged person goes on for a full nine months according to plan.

Trusting and doubting all the time is like persecution, idiocy, or half-pregnancy.

It is impossible to shorten the term or duration of pregnancy by reforming complex numbers or the calendar. – Stanislav Lets

Read the continuation of the famous aphorisms and quotes on the pages:

I went out into the fresh air to work up an appetite. And, judging by the stomach, worked up. – A.V. Ivanov

I will sell a test for ... positive)))

Men! This is a miracle, not a curse!

The spiral of evolution turned out to be contraceptive. – Gennady Malkin

Desirable gum - this stuff for dryuchki. – A.V. Ivanov

The most interesting situation is when a woman who finds herself in an interesting position is very interested in: which of the possible applicants for paternity put her in such an interesting position? – Yuri Tatarkin

So in the heat of the moment they made me ... - A.V. Ivanov

You can't live like this! It's time to protect yourself! – Maya Chetvertova

Sex and - it's like ice cream and a sore throat.

This is a unique time in a woman's life that is worth living on a royal scale!!!

They make different inscriptions on T-shirts.
Why not write different
lettering on wedding dresses? For example, the inscription “Not pregnant!”
a wild success! Vladimir Borisov

Darling, we'd better take our time... because it seems to me that it influences your decisions.
- No, no, Marshal, we must not miss this opportunity! Just because a mushroom is growing in me now ...
- Fruit.
“…Doesn’t mean that my thought peoples…”
- Mental capacity.
- ... Became umbilical!
- I... I have no idea.

A powerful flashlight - blind!

Here you are friends with someone and then it suddenly turns out that he is in love with you ... it's like a positive test for and

The best test is to wait 9 months

A man walks into a pharmacy: -Two tests for and two validol.

The inscription on the maternity hospital: hey-gay, strays!

Most women dream of getting married because of great and pure love, but as a result, they get married mainly on a whim. - Vladimir Borisov.

You don't really know a guy until you ask him to put on a condom. – Madonna

The best way to protect yourself is by mouth. – A.V. Ivanov

This shocker is in service with the Chinese police

Envy is when you buy a test at a pharmacy, and the girl in front of you is tampons

If you imagine for a moment that a man can become pregnant, then abortion will become a church sacrament.

The inscription at the entrance to the Chinese maternity hospital: Enough!!!

Only a pregnant man can be more capricious than a pregnant woman.

Any pregnant woman is like a Trojan horse.

And next time I'll tell you how to use a felt-tip pen and a test to make your boyfriend nervous

She's nervous.. Nervous

Look how big your belly is. You will burst, baby. - Eh, dad, dad .. If I tell you the truth, you'll go nuts ...

I have been tormented by one question for a very long time: how do girls get pregnant on a television show and in high security places? Even in the animal kingdom, they do not breed in captivity.

The best contraceptive is pregnancy.

This, like, torn, sealed, did not help?

For some reason, I got mad at Daniel. He, too, is responsible, but he does not have to spend eight pounds ninety-five pence, hide in the toilet and write on a stick ...

They say they invented an absolutely reliable birth control pill. Too late. It would be better if she was a bone in an apple that the serpent offered to Eve. – Stanislav Jerzy Lec

The best time to study is pregnancy, because two people study in one. – Elena Ermolova

Father, I got pregnant. Keep a list of accomplices.

A strained relationship with a condom is not burdensome. – Evgeny Khankin

- this is when you feel sick and pull on salty. For example, sick of boredom and pulling on the salty sea!

Abortion shish, womb! palindrome) - Stepan Balakin

No guy will understand what those 3 minutes are worth when you take a test for ...

Men! This is a miracle, not a curse! Sex and - it's like ice cream and a sore throat.

The hen Ryaba saw Faberge eggs and did not envy the hen who gave birth to these eggs ... - Vladimir Borisov

Our friendship slowly grew into yours

The test for is like children's tights: if there are 2 stripes, it means ASS!

Cupid's arrows are a mysterious thing. Their hitting a woman will not only not injure her, but even stop the bleeding for many months ...

It would be time to decorate not only T-shirts, but also wedding dresses with inscriptions ... For example, the inscription is very relevant: NOT ... PREGNANT!!! – Vladimir Borisov

A woman is a mystery, and her only clue is ...

you also, opening your mouth in surprise, thoughtfully hold out hereeeeeeeeee ...

Commentary: I will explain right away - I will not explain! – V. Galashev

How long ago was it that you want more.

So what is the paradox of life? Why are condoms, patches and tests on the same row in many pharmacies?

Virtual communication leads to the immaculate conception and the birth of children with avatar faces and nicknames. – Elena Ermolova

Mania on what-whether at all??? Wherever you go everyone is pregnant...

This is when you feel sick and pull on salt. For example, sick of boredom and pulling on the salty sea!

Tell me, were there any pregnant women in your family?

A man is never space. And a pregnant woman in the second half of pregnancy, at least, is a closed space for another human being.

If you want to get a strong dose of adrenaline, do not go on a roller coaster, it is better to take a pregnancy test.

He made her a position she couldn't refuse...

Material expression of sexual satisfaction.

Oh Mary, conceived without sin, make it possible for me to sin without conception! Augustine Broan

Unfortunately, reproductive physiology is such that contact is necessary.

The problem not only went deeper, but also led to an unwanted pregnancy. – Mikhail Mamchich

Our friendship slowly grew into yours. God gave me an inexpressible MIRACLE, I will be happier, I will be a MOM :)

Tests for are take-off green sticks. – Vladimir Borisov

The whole time I was pregnant with Kevin, I struggled with the very idea of ​​Kevin, with the belief that I had demoted myself, gone from driver to car, from landlady to home.

To expectant mothers! You are strong - you are ready to give birth to your miracle alone, you are happy - you will have your own family! You have diapers ahead, nights without sleep, the first tooth, the first mother, the first step. Good luck to you!

The best contraceptive is a glass of cold water: not before or after, but instead. Humor)

If you like safe sex, don't get married. - Gennady Malkin.

It’s not 5 years already, but I’m still running and looking into the bag, when my mother comes, suddenly there is something delicious)

I will sell a test for ... Positive.)

The female body is like a clockwork: as soon as you start it, it ticks for nine months. – Mikhail Mamchich

Once I crossed the threshold of motherhood, I suddenly became public property, the animated equivalent of a public park. That cutesy expression You now eat for two, dear perfectly conveys the fact that even your dinner is no longer your business. Indeed, when the land of the free has mastered the methods of coercion, the expression You now eat for us implies that two hundred and something million sticking their noses around will object if you want to eat a donut with jam, rather than a full meal of organic products and vegetables, including all five major food groups. The right to command pregnant women will certainly be included in the Constitution.

Do not ask in what cases it is possible to kill the unborn. Answer: for what? – Boleslav Paszkowski

Mom: How do you protect yourself? Daughter: Moral principles, mom!

If you want to get rid of a guy, just get pregnant with him. There was a guy, no boyfriend.

If you are puzzled by the question of how to spend a night that will remain in your memory forever. I have an answer - take delivery.

Everything in a woman is a mystery and the key to everything is her pregnancy.

“The Queen of Scots has a legitimate son, and I am just a dead, withered bough!” Elizabeth I

Girls live in a world of fears. They are afraid of never getting pregnant and afraid to fly ...

The most powerful adrenaline rush is not a roller coaster, but waiting for the test result on !!!

Painfully familiar music and some strange feeling of life in the chest area ...)

Light falling in love is just as absurd as light falling in love.

It's hard for you women, menstruation, cellulite, childbirth ... And Nekhuy was to pizd apples !!!

Daddy, are you awake? The baby is talking to you. I'm right here, in the dark, in my mother's stomach. I have your nose and eyes, I feel your caresses, my laughter will soon flow, crying, or rather, but not from grief. And while I'm growing up, you protect your mother. I already love you all. Wait, I will come to you soon!

How good it is to know that another heart is beating inside you, from your beloved little man.

The best cargo in the world is a baby in the belly!

Do you know what it's like to put your hand on the belly of a pregnant girl... It's like touching the universe... To the future small world... It's wonderful! It's incomparable to anything... It's like touching the universe... Touching the beautiful... To the unknown...

He turned my head so much that I was sick for 9 months ...

I'm so funny... My navel is upright... I walk slowly and I'm afraid to go to the hospital... It's so interesting - is she or he there, now I'm not alone, I'm 2 in 1...

If you are pregnant, this is temporary. If you are not pregnant - this is also temporary.

Statuses about pregnancy - Pregnancy is a unique time in a woman's life that is worth living with a royal scale!

Bunny, you know what I thought ... And come on, if we have a girl, then we'll call Ksyusha, and if it's a boy, then Vlad. - WHAT? - I completely forgot to tell you! In short, I took a pregnancy test yesterday ...

A cat is a love drug, and a tummy grows from it. There, a little man, such a paw, will open his eyes and say "PAPA"!

The most powerful adrenaline rush is not a roller coaster, but waiting for the result of a pregnancy test !!!

God gave me an unspeakable miracle - I will become wiser, I will be a mother. Your heart beats like a butterfly in me - wake up, smile, and it will smile. It will not betray, it will be a joy, a particle of me, a golden starfall.

What a strange bliss to realize that there, inside, perfection grows and ripens, my angel, the fruit of my love.

You know, there is no one more beautiful than a pregnant woman ... In the eyes - happiness ... In the heart - love ... On the cheeks - a blush ... And inside - a small life ...

A pregnancy test is like children's tights: if there are 2 stripes, it means ASS!

Darling, tell me 3 great words that forever connect loved ones? - Honey, I'm pregnant!

You know, according to the results of one test, it turns out that you have to live with me all your life! - What's the test? - Pregnancy...

On the seventh month of happiness!

Sex and pregnancy are like ice cream and a sore throat.

Only a pregnant man can be more capricious than a pregnant woman.

A man is never space. And a pregnant woman in the second half of pregnancy, at least, is a closed space for another human being.

The best hairstyle is clean hair, the best makeup is healthy sleep, the best figure is pregnancy.

Under the moon and sun, troubles will pass by, our house with you, passing by. We'll watch the sparks by the fireplace. You will become a mother, and I will become a father ...

Many girls want to marry only for love, but marry only for pregnancy.

Waiting for the birth of a baby is an amazing state, overflowing with emotions. Therefore, the woman herself, and her family and friends, by all means, need to post statuses about pregnancy in their social networks. These statuses can express interesting behavior, unusual preferences and sudden changes in the mood of the one who carries the baby under her heart.

Funny pregnancy statuses

Of course, without humor anywhere. Therefore, take note of the following statuses, which will definitely be able to find their place on the pages of Vkontakte, Odnoklassniki and other social networks.

My girlfriend started getting better

And they lie on the couch all day,

She also fights with her stomach.

And all because there is a house for children.

I eat herring with chocolate

Jelly with marmalade,

Borscht with cake

radish cookies,

Because in the stomach

I have a baby.

Some will say that I'm strange.

I don't know what I want.

I will answer, no, it is not so,

I just want a sandwich

I season with sausage,

Apple and dried apricots,

And also jam, cheese,

To taste sweet.

Don't think bad

It's just that my baby lives in my tummy.

I asked my husband for a cake

To not be sad.

But while he's in the store,

I want cabbage.

And then I want herrings

Sweet sticks, honey.

He pleases all the time

Because the darling knows

That I'm expecting a baby.

Tastes are different.

From the desire for sweet tears run.

And while I'm in the store, I already need an orange.

Baby dictates tastes to me, and then sits, savoring.

Statuses about pregnancy: beautiful, filled with emotions

Of course, women in position are overwhelmed with emotions. Therefore, sometimes they really need to read statuses about pregnancy, from which a tear will well up, and they will fully understand their condition. Pay attention to the following options. Deep and meaningful statuses about pregnancy:

In anticipation of a miracle, I will not harm myself.

I will eat everything that is healthy

Listen to lovely music.

I will study all the books and magazines,

The ones that write about children.

And then I will sit quietly, quietly, and listen to my blood.

I have studied all the sites

I read poems in them

I also learned fairy tales

Songs of ringing souls.

And now I sit, I sing,

And I'm expecting a baby.

I dress out of fashion

And so, how comfortable the stomach,

Because its inhabitant

I value very much.

So as not to hurt his house,

No rubber bands, no straps

I'll jump into a vest dress,

And I'll go for a walk in silence.

About pregnant women in verse

Of course, pregnancy statuses are “waiting for a miracle”, these are not only short or rhyming sayings. Whole poems could be written about this situation.

A leg popped out on my stomach.

Oh, and this leg wants to run along the path.

But while sitting in me, daughter or son

Sometimes knocking down my rhythms of days and nights.

There, in the tummy, it's warm, and it's perfectly visible,

When mommy doesn't sleep

Treasures every second

As long as she carries

The home of the most beloved creature on earth.

Though sometimes strange women are pregnant,

But this strangeness is given to them from above, probably.

So that evil was not noticed, the nervous system was protected.

And when the baby appears, they were fully aware of themselves.

Wonder Women and their behavior in verse

Pregnancy with sarcasm or peppercorns. They are also worth paying attention to.

I bought a test today

And a red marker

I'll draw two stripes

To hide fears.

Let me offer my hand

Will call for marriage.

And a beautiful bride

Then he will call.

I got up early today

Overturned again

All diapers, undershirts,

The bed that was about to be made.

I'm ironing all the clothes again

I check the clasps

Because very soon

I will see my baby.

The collection has been going on for a month now.

Thinking of a trip?

Yes, almost right

But on the journey, I need:

Pampers, napkins, pipettes,

Bottles, nipples, sliders, booties,

Envelope, creams, powders, saucers,

Oh, how can I not dodge,

Do not forget everything that is on the list

When I go to the hospital.

And yet, statuses about pregnancy, in anticipation of the most emotional meeting, can be short.

I went to the hospital, I will return as a mother.

Today I put together a package that will give me a ticket to the hospital.

Diapers, diapers, nipples, booties, clothes, of course, and sweets for yourself.

Soon my husband will be walking under the windows, mom, dad and grandmother too,

Because in the world I give birth to someone who is dearer to everyone's life.

Boring, dull, monotonous life will end very soon,

Just you hold on.

Little, cute, pretty little ball,

I don't know if my daughter is sitting there or my son.

But I feel a soft, tender body,

Who knows where to go.

Express your emotions and convey your feelings. It's so sweet and sensual.

Pregnancy for a woman is God's providence, pregnancy for a man is a test of the sincerity of feelings...

There is a big difference between getting pregnant and getting pregnant!

A man is never space. And a pregnant woman in the second half of pregnancy, at least, is a closed space for another human being.

Truly happy is the girl who carries under her heart a child conceived by a man.

Make it a rule to terminate the pregnancy even in the period.

Nothing spoils a woman like a man.

Classic Pregnancy Quotes

A real family begins with the birth of a child...

Unfortunately, reproductive physiology is such that contact is necessary.

When she comes out, pinch her nose, and I will blow into her mouth, the child will jump out of her.

Ultimate Classic Pregnancy Quotes

Before you get pregnant, you have to get married so that someone has to have sex with you!

And today, I was kicked and bounced all night... What an interesting feeling it is when someone lives inside you :)

I am pregnant! - I don't remember us... - You were drunk! I don't remember ever getting so drunk!

Nowadays, only ... another pregnant woman can give way to a pregnant woman on a bus.

Children are flowers of life. How I want this bouquet...

The only bright spot was a cheerful poster in pink tones and the inscription on top: "Pregnancy is the natural state of a woman." It turns out that until now I have been in the unnatural?!

It's so great to wake up in the morning with peace in your soul, with love in your heart, with light music in your head and with a tiny life inside...

The first pregnancy is for the wedding. The second is for money. The third - wanted. The fourth, fifth and subsequent - let them run, it's a pity or something.

Pregnancy is a virus that men carry, but only women get sick.

With my taste preferences, I'm generally afraid to get pregnant. Perhaps I would like wool or machine oil. Or capture Bulgaria.

No, Thomas. I'm not pregnant. - Thank God! With your ears and my face, our children are not to be envied.

Happy Classic Pregnancy Quotes

It’s even curious what it’s like to find out that you will soon become a father? Did Tom pee in his pants out of fear or was he just confused?

When we quarreled with your dad (and we quarreled mainly because it seemed to me that he did not correctly solve my whimsical charades, which means - oh, horror! - does not love me), he ran out to take a sip of air, choking from an acute shortage of words. And I clasped you with my hands over the ball of your stomach and lamented that, well, they don’t understand us, they don’t love us, and we were left alone, but we won’t leave each other, never, and always understand without further ado ... Your dad would come back, put a flowering cherry plum sprig in front of us, and say his meek "Forgive me."

When I grow up and learn, I will write a movie about real childbirth. About how things really happen here. Very famous actors will be filmed there, this is important. Everyone should know what it is to give birth to a person. Maybe if we knew more about this side of a complex human life, if we didn’t consider it only a female attraction, then there would be fewer wars?

The most powerful adrenaline rush is not a roller coaster, but waiting for the result of a pregnancy test!

A child is a message from God, made with love.

When a woman is about to give birth, nature does something with her, surrounds her with some kind of aura, gives her a special attraction...

Luxurious Classic Pregnancy Quotes

Once I crossed the threshold of motherhood, I suddenly became public property, the animated equivalent of a public park. That cutesy expression "You're eating for two now, honey" perfectly conveys the fact that even your dinner is no longer your business. Indeed, when the land of the free has mastered the methods of coercion, the expression "You now eat for us" implies that two hundred and something million sticking their noses around will object if you want to eat a donut with jam, rather than a full meal of organic products and vegetables, including all five major food groups.

Girls who wrote "Hooray, I'm not pregnant" in the toilet with blood?

Pregnant women have a special energy, they radiate heat.

They say that in order for a man to feel what pregnancy is, he needs to tie 1.5 kg of cereal to each leg, give a sleeping pill, a diuretic and tie something like a stomach to his belt, and send him to work!

Do you want to be the father of my child? - What? - Just give me cum.

Andrei was affectionate with her, called her a little blood, at first they didn’t think about the kids, they just lived next to each other, enjoying their closeness, and nothing more. A child could even interfere with this happiness. But then, somehow, gradually, stealthily, just because there was a danger of violating the eternal order of family majesty, an alarm arose from somewhere, something that at first was avoided and feared, now they began to guard - will it or will it not? Months passed, nothing changed, and then the expectation grew into impatience, then into fear.

If you have ever seen the eyes of a happy pregnant woman, then you will agree with me that no diamonds can compare with the beautiful sparkle of these eyes!

Why must one become ugly in order to produce a new being?

In general, pregnant women are usually treated as feeble-minded. Like, a normal person will not reach such an absurd state.

Humorous Classic Pregnancy Quotes

He moved, the child moved! - Oh my God! - No, wait... No, it's the elastic band on the shorts is torn.

Emilien, I'm in a position! - But how? - The wind blew. I forgot to close the window.

The little daughter came to her father and asked the baby: "Two strips - good?" Dad got sick.

And I had no idea that the contemplation of a pregnant woman is so calming - as soon as I go into the subway car, all the sitting guys fall asleep ...

Yeah .. pregnancy is such a thing: either she is affectionate and loving, then ... - Cruel, vengeful and castrating? - Well, I wanted to say "capricious" ... - Well, everything is still ahead.

You are a sailor, I am a sailor. You are a fisherman, I am a fisherman. You are on land, I am at sea, how did you get pregnant?

The girl decided to inform her husband about the pregnancy in an original way - she renamed her name on her husband’s phone to the name “Stork”, and in the morning, when her husband left for work, she sent him an SMS: “I have already left ... I will be back in about 8 months. .. Wait ")))

I am pregnant. - Are you pregnant with a baby? - How long have you been sniffing these markers? Of course, a child!

Ultrasound showed that they will have ... WEDDING!

The whole time I was pregnant with Kevin, I struggled with the very idea of ​​Kevin, with the belief that I had demoted myself, gone from driver to car, from landlady to home.

Now everyone is getting married “on a whim”, but I don’t want it like that ... But I want the beloved person to marry me not because she is pregnant, but because she loves me and cannot live without me for a second ...

My girl has a bun in the oven, and I guess you know who the damn baker is.