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Learning to express emotions! The best ways to express your feelings to your loved one


Expressing your emotions and feelings is important and correct. But in some cases, you may be mistaken for. For example, you say, “How angry I am! - or, "It upsets me." In response, the interlocutor immediately corrects his behavior - it means that you are manipulating, even if you do not realize it. And if this happens again, a serious conflict can occur.

It is important to express your emotions in such a way as not to let the person know that we want something from him. This is difficult and this is what this article is for. We have the right to feel angry, upset, guilty, or discouraged, but we need to express these emotions in a constructive manner.

Psychologist Marshall Rosenberg identified four principles that can be guided by which you can express your emotions and at the same time not irritate the people we turn to. It is necessary to adhere to these principles both with friends and family, and with strangers. Don't think that if a person is close to you or completely distant, it changes the rules of the game.

Four fundamental principles of nonviolent communication

  • Observation... To be a great conversationalist, you must learn to focus on the facts before defining or judging a situation. If someone did not show up for the meeting within the time limit, then this is the only information that is available to you. You should not lose your temper, call to express your dissatisfaction. You should not think that this is rude or that the person does not value the relationship. These are not facts. By succumbing to these thoughts, you will behave like an emotional manipulator, demanding explanations and expressing resentment and anger. There can be dozens of reasons why a person didn't show up for a meeting or was late. Trying to induce guilt in him, you run the risk of achieving the opposite result.
  • The senses... For you, you must express your feelings and emotions honestly and frankly. When your boss refuses to give you a promotion, you start to think it’s dishonest, identifying it with the boss’s own being dishonest. You can expect other concessions and the fact that he himself will guess about them. You may even start to work worse, behave impolitely. All of this is emotional manipulation. Express your feelings without offense: "I feel upset", "I am disappointed because ...".
  • Needs... It is helpful to understand that almost all feelings and emotions are needs. Therefore, it is important to talk about your needs in the proper manner, not as a child. Imagine the situation. The wife tells her husband, “You spend too much time at work,” after which he takes a day off and goes fishing with friends. From the outside it's funny, but my wife is unlikely to be fun. When asking someone for a request or advice, remember not to be misunderstood.
  • Inquiries... Needs can take the form of requests. At the same time, it is important that these are requests, not requirements. Respect other people. Much can be achieved from a person if he knows that he is respected. Do not forget that the request is your request and this is the person you need, and not vice versa.

Following these guidelines is a great start for almost any communication. Which, of course, does not negate the fact that your request may be rejected, the need is not satisfied, the feelings are not accepted, and the observations can turn out to be inaccurate.

Feelings are a two-way street. The fact that you feel something does not mean that it will be understood by the interlocutor. However, keeping these principles in mind, the likelihood of mutual understanding increases many times over.

How to express your feelings in a friendly way

Here are some tips:

  • Be sincere about your feelings.... This advice seems trivial and for this very reason, rarely anyone listens to it. Plus, most people don't understand their feelings and emotions. Therefore, if you are experiencing similar difficulties, improve yours. The inability to express feelings hits the patient himself - the relationship with other people.
  • Take responsibility for your emotions and feelings... When certain people or situations affect our feelings and emotions, we must remember that we are responsible for them. If someone or something annoys us, then it is our fault, our reaction. When someone disappoints us, we should also accept responsibility for our emotion. No one and nothing can force us to experience emotion until we ourselves want it. What happens when we refuse to accept responsibility for an emotion? That's right, we use this as an excuse for bad decisions and bad behavior. We immediately become emotional manipulators.
  • Communicate Your Needs Without Judgment... Saying what you want without condemning or blaming seems like an overwhelming task for most people.
  • Make a specific request... The request must be accurate, because if it can be misunderstood, it will. People have different meanings of words like "a lot" and "little", "love" and "betrayal." Therefore, the first step is to be in the same coordinate system, to speak the same language. It is curious, but sometimes it is useful for oneself to answer the questions "What do I mean by a relationship?" and "What is freedom and happiness for me?"
  • Remember that the other person also has feelings and needs.... starts where the needs and wants of one party are taken into account. Your interlocutor does not necessarily need to be given something material, sometimes food is enough for respect. Every person wants to be appreciated and their merits respected. Therefore, first, listen, try to understand and show that he was listened to and understood. And in no case show that your feelings are more important than his feelings, otherwise it will be much more difficult for you to come to a mutual agreement.
  • Respect the interlocutor when he says no... It is very easy to love and respect people who agree with you, indulge you, give what you want. And how difficult it is to do the same when we don't get what we want. This requires wisdom, respect, understanding. There are very few people with such qualities. Refusal can be painful for you, but keep in mind that this is not the person's fault. It's in his best interest to refuse you, and that's perfectly fine. You must accept his decision and move on.

We wish you good luck!

“For the first two years of marriage, my husband and I had a scandal every now and then. Getting married, moving to a new apartment, having a baby - we had to adapt to these stresses. At first, we poured out the accumulated fatigue and anger in endless claims to each other, said hurtful and unpleasant things. Once, in a fit of anger, I even broke a plate. At that moment, we both realized that it was impossible to continue living like this - we had to learn to behave in a civilized manner and respect each other's feelings, ”34-year-old Maria describes the situation through which many young families pass with more or less success.

“A few hours later, we calmed down, talked about what was happening, found the strength and wisdom to apologize to each other. Quarrels and conflicts have not gone away from our lives at all, but new levers to control our mood have appeared. Eight years have passed since then. We have learned to talk. At first, for several days they discussed the problems that arose, not finding a solution and a compromise, they were offended, but already without shouting. The most interesting thing is that after a few days of conversations, the subject of the dispute disappeared by itself. Now the periods of mutual grievances have decreased to several hours. We may be suppressing our feelings by leaving too much unspoken. I prefer to think that we have learned to separate the main from the secondary and negotiate. "

Identify the source

“You experience this or that feeling for a very specific reason, and your task is to understand it,” says Joan Harvey, a psychologist at the University of Newcastle (UK). If you miss the reason and succumb to the flow of feelings, it can take you far from the shores of reality.

Often, irritation or anger is a signal that someone has violated your boundaries, and you did not have the courage to defend them.

Anger forces you to say or do stupid things and endangers you and those around you. Anxiety, fear, sadness can knock the soil out from under your feet and lead to depression when you are unable to do even what you usually enjoy. A bad mood reduces the defenses of your immune system.

Ask yourself: what's going on? Why is this happening to me? When you are angry, anxious, or sad, do you always understand the reason for your condition? Many do not even think about it. At best, their response is "I'm angry because he didn't do what I want," "I'm worried because I'm late for an important event."

This is a reaction to external circumstances or the behavior of other people, you did not go further, did not analyze your own experiences. After all, no matter who said what, you are the one who emotionally reacts. The better you learn to understand your emotions, the easier it will be for you to deal with them.

For example, annoyance or anger is often a signal that someone has violated your boundaries, and you did not have the courage to defend them. Couldn't refuse someone to help, and then you feel overwhelmed and tired? Probably fatigue here masks anger. If you allowed yourself to get really angry, you might not have to sacrifice your well-being.

Anxiety and excitement often arise in situations where we are afraid of not living up to the expectations of others. Ask yourself the question: whose expectations are you really trying so hard to meet? And why is it a disaster for you to deviate from this task?

Gift of attention

Four years ago, Anna (now 37) found herself feeling guilty about her state of mind. “I was married with two children, but I felt worthless, it seemed to me that I was wasting my life. I understood that my mood was a reaction to circumstances: an unloved job, money problems, but I didn't know what to do about it. "

Once the teacher of the youngest daughter asked Anna to meet - the girl often cried at school. “I was on the verge of despair and stopped noticing the good things in my life. But it is even more terrible that I stopped noticing those closest to me - I completely lost sight of the state of my children. "

This incident helped Anna realize that, in spite of everything, only she is responsible for what happens to her. It is necessary not to wait for changes, but to change itself. She learned to be more attentive to herself, children and her husband, changed jobs and began to get more pleasure out of life.

We cannot prevent unpleasant events, but it is in our power to change the attitude towards them. Fixing a feeling, giving it a name and a place within yourself is the first step to gaining the ability to control your mood.

If you are upset or angry about something, it is important to pass this feeling through your mind and try to understand its meaning.

A diary will help to cope with this task. Formulating feelings on paper, you simultaneously pass them through consciousness and free them so that they do not accumulate inside.

“The next step is an internal dialogue about feelings,” says Willem Kaiken, head of the psychological center in Exeter, UK. - Often we give feelings a logically incorrect assessment, it leads us to a dead end. Determine what has unsettled you, and feel free to change the wording. For example, a typical situation for motorists: you were cut off. You are scared, angry.

Anger is the hardest thing to control. It starts when we feel a threat to our health, self-esteem, and dignity. Try to change the course of your thoughts, replace: “Who drives like this? He could have killed me ... "to:" Maybe he just did not notice me or is too nervous today. In the end, everything worked out, no one was hurt. "

Live and grow up

Each feeling has a reason, meaning and teaches us something. Psychoanalysts call this learning function "psyche structuring." When a person discovers that some of his needs cannot be met, he experiences not only anger, but also sadness. It is she who allows you to realize that it is not the principle of pleasure that dominates in life, but the principle of reality, that both you and the people around you have boundaries.

Disappointment and sadness when we cannot get what we want teach us to respect the choice of another person and find support within ourselves. This is a necessary stage of growing up, which is often ignored by the desire to see only the good in everything and to avoid negative experiences.

Learn to accept yourself in different moods. It is impossible to be always cheerful - periods of sadness, disappointment, frustration of hopes are inherent in each of us. In addition to making our lives more diverse, they represent an invaluable experience of inner maturation and rethinking life. So if you are wondering what to do with feelings, let them just be to begin with.

The question of original and unusual declarations of love is interesting to many, especially ardent and romantic people. Indeed, one can hardly imagine at least one heart in love that does not want to express its emotions in the form of unique confessions, etc. Confessions of a guy - that's what worries many girls with the onset of spring ...

Love is the very It is incomparable with anything, only by loving you can give without asking in return, give, without expecting a gift from another person, breathe, only to see and feel. The modern world is so cruel that there is practically no place for love in it. How often confessions are not sincere and are aimed only at obtaining benefits. The same is true for girls: men are no longer ready to commit acts, throw all the flowers of the world at their feet, devote their lives to one and only. Confessing feelings to a guy has become a rarity than a particular. There is probably the only day of the year when people remember love - Valentine's Day. On this holiday, everyone wants to come up with the most original declaration of love.

Every girl should understand, despite all his visible masculinity and inaccessibility, she needs affectionate words. It can be a husband or just a guy, the main thing is a beloved and dear one. The strong half values ​​the words of love very much, but they simply do not admit this because of the fear of being caught in infantilism. boyfriend will make your relationship even stronger, tender and sincere. They will remind your man that you are his beloved woman, long-forgotten flowers, sweets, dates and courtship will immediately appear.

Confessions should not be made public only on holidays. Remember them in the morning, then the whole day will go well, or at night, so that falling asleep, your man thought that he was not mistaken and that you are the best woman on earth.

There is no place for embarrassment in declarations of love. Say what is in your heart, do not be afraid to seem stupid or naive. Remember that men love and need compliments even more than women. In society, focus on his intelligence and ingenuity, in private - on his beauty, masculinity and even sexuality, you will see, the result will be pleasant.

Many women do not want to tell their man about love, fearing that they will spoil him and dissolve him. It is a myth. Analyze your life together or relationship. How often we women are unfair to our loved ones, we break down. A man will appreciate the originality of your confessions, do not be banal. Come up with unusual affectionate nicknames and comparisons, funny confessions, bizarre phrases - men like this, the more there will be an extra reason to smile.

Romance is the key to a successful relationship. Cook your boyfriend or husband's favorite dish, light candles, buy wine - a great excuse to confess your feelings to your beloved. You can do it in another way: invite your loved one on a date, for example, a walk in the park. Walk, hand in hand, hug, this is very useful for reinforcing the feelings. Anytime you feel like confessing your love, stop and do it. An unexpected confession will smite your man on the spot, and he will remember this day for a long time.

Here are some phrases to help you:

ü My dear, I love you!

ü You are the best man in the world!

ü You are the man of my life!

ü If I had not met you, my life would have been wasted!

ü I don't need anyone but you!

ü I am the happiest woman because you are my husband!

ü I dream that our son would have your wisdom and strength

ü My dear, my affectionate, my beloved, my very best and many others

Say words of love to your man in your ear, or with a breath. Let only he hear it, and he will only need you.

Attention, expressed in a gentle word, is necessary for any person, regardless of gender, age, social status. There is an opinion that men are indifferent to such manifestations of the second half. The article below will debunk this myth and tell you how to express feelings to your beloved man in beautiful words in your own words.

Why is it important not to forget to say beautiful words to a man

  1. With the inherent brutality and independence of men, most of them need a simple feeling of tenderness, the feeling that they are dear, loved by a woman.
  2. Psychologists consider men who hear beautiful words of the other half on a regular basis are often more successful in business. This fact is explained by self-confidence. The feeling of "positive" superiority over competitors is given to the young man by his beloved with words, affection, and attention.
  3. Many boys were raised by men from early childhood, which means they rarely heard tender words. Growing up, in order to gain confidence in making male decisions, a “boy” needs beautiful words, praise from the closest person - his beloved.
  4. A correctly chosen tender word can resolve many conflicts, set a man on the right, necessary for a woman, direction to make an important decision.

Affectionate words: how to use

Beautiful words to your beloved man in your own words are the perfect way to illustrate a warm, reverent, attentive attitude. Gentle words addressed to the "strong half" can take many forms.

Psychologists say that for the best perception of compliments by a man, phrases and words should be short, extremely "transparent".

This characteristic is possessed by diminutive forms of words:

  • bunny;
  • cat;
  • darling;
  • Sun;
  • dear;
  • smile.

100 short compliment words for your beloved man

1.beautiful
2.smart
3. caring
4.attractive
5.sexy
6.kind
7. gentle
8. cute
9. charming
10. charming
11.unique
12.indescribable
13.unforgettable
14. irresistible
15.chic
16.blazing
17.passionate
18.unavailable
19. divine
20.bewitching
21. angelic
22. beaming
23.Sexy
24.Bright
25.fluffy
26. Awesome
27.
28.Slender
29. seductive
30. flirtatious
31.Sophisticated
32. Graceful
33. Cheerful
34.
35. creative
36.Stylish
37.
38. tactful
39.
40. romantic
41. versatile
42. fabulous
43.
44.
45. the only one
46.
47.Sweet
48.
49.
50.Unpredictable
51.
52.
53.
54.
55.
56.
57. best
58.
59.
60.
61.
62.
63.
64.
65.
66.
67.
68.
69.
70.
71.
72.
73.
74.
75.
76.
77.
78.
79.
80.
81. Honest
82.
83.
84.
85.
86.
87.
88.
89. Feminine
90.
91.
92.
93.
94.
95.
96.
97.
98.
99. beloved
100. most-most

Beautiful phrases in your own words

The phrases implying comparisons will definitely affect the soul.

Especially a man will be impressed by words that are understandable only to him and the second half:


A woman can speak beautiful words to a beloved man in her own words for the purpose of praise, encouragement of the second half. You should not praise any trifle, made by the "earner". This action looks sarcastic, it can offend a person. It is pertinent to note the promotion received by the man, the quickly completed task.

A prudently booked table in the restaurant for Valentine's Day:

  • Already figured out the boss's order? Dear, I had absolutely no doubt that you can handle it!
  • Darling, thanks for booking a table. With you I feel like a small, fragile girl, because you take care of even small "details"!
  • I absolutely support Ivan Ivanovich in his decision to raise you. You are the most worthy candidate for the position. He was obliged to single out such a responsible, executive employee!
  • I was sure that you would cope with Igor Sergeyevich's order! With your perseverance and scrupulous approach, this cooperation is doomed to success!

In praising a man, it is important to observe the line between sincerity and flattery. In such a case, beautiful words will cause negativity, alienate the young man.


Beautiful words for a beloved man are not difficult to get from the depths of the soul, the main thing is to insert them during

Having a desire to make a man feel good, it is worth using words of support in time. In the modern world, too many responsibilities are imposed by society on the "strong half of humanity."

Certain expectations are physically difficult to justify. At such moments, it is appropriate to remind a man that the "half" is nearby, ready to share happiness along with negative emotions.

Beautiful phrases can give strength for further action:

  • These circumstances are absolutely unimportant, because we are together no matter what.
  • You can always count on me.
  • This situation is temporary. Things will get better soon, don't worry.
  • Never mind what happened. I am confident in your competence in this matter. It takes a little more effort, and things will go uphill.

Beautiful words to a beloved man in your own words, it is worth speaking depending on the context of the situation, without detracting from the scale of the emotions experienced by a man.

Nice words in the morning

With beautiful words, you can formulate support, express love for a man, set the tone for the upcoming day. Morning declarations of love will give an incentive to work out the shift as efficiently as possible., quickly return to the "gentle" embrace of your beloved. Having felt a dose of tenderness in the morning, a man will not be able to get angry, getting stuck in a traffic jam on the way to work or listening to the grumbling of an office cleaner.

Beautiful words from a woman to a beloved man in the morning will be able to charge positive for the whole day, and a girl, expressing feelings in her own words, will not be able to take off her smile at work, thinking about her "half" and being in anticipation of an evening meeting with her beloved.

Everything highlighted in green above is pure water, because these are your personal reflections on this and that. Instead, you need to write specific, sweet and beautiful words and phrases. And you "fly in the clouds" and describe it all.

Need specifics:

  • Hello sweetheart! I sleep so sweetly next to you that I began to dislike waking up in the morning even more. Although, without waking up in the morning, I will not see you, such a cute, sleepy, most beautiful bear cub in the world.
  • It is such an amazing feeling when I dream of you in a beautiful dream, then I wake up and see you, so close ... I want to stop a moment to endlessly admire you and feel the all-consuming feeling of love!
  • Good morning honey! I know that the coming day will be productive, successful and full of extremely positive emotions. Let the working hours pass unnoticed, and you will soon find yourself at home, next to me! I love you!

Gentle words before bed

Beautiful words can not only provide a good mood for your beloved man for the whole day, but also help you relax in your own words after hard work days, support, give hope that "tomorrow" will radically differ from "today" for the better.

Hearing warm words before going to bed, a man will fall asleep with a smile. In this case, the morning awakening in a good mood will be much easier for both sides of a couple in love.

Beautiful words to your beloved man in your own words will become the key to his calm deep sleep.

This fact can significantly increase the productivity of the subsequent time spent at work:

  • I know that you are very tired today and dream of a vacation. May you dream of a sunset by the ocean shore, where we two can see off the day, holding hands tightly. Let all the difficulties and troubles be resolved by themselves tomorrow. Goodnight! I love you!
  • You know, today I counted the minutes until I met you. I so wanted to hug you as soon as possible, kiss you and sleep sweetly in your arms. I feel calm and comfortable with you, because I know that you are my fortress. Thank you for being with me. Goodnight!
  • Good night, dear! Today we will definitely meet you in a dream. And tomorrow you will feel my love and tenderness in reality. Sleep tight.

Words of love for every day

Everyday routine usually contains few reasons for smiling, joy. There is a universal remedy that cannot leave you indifferent - gentle phrases about feelings for a person.

In the case of sending this message at the "right" moment, when, the boss has told off, there is no strength to work, the effectiveness of such a recognition increases several times. You can express your feelings through personal communication, by phone call, SMS, as an option, by ordering a courier with pizza and a gentle note to work for the second half.

The feeling of need, love gives a man the strength to conquer any peaks.

  • Kitty, I want you to know that you are always on my mind. I cannot concentrate on work, because in my head there is only one, the most beautiful, courageous, cheerful, kind and reliable man on this planet - you.
  • When I'm sad, I think about meeting you soon. When it seems to me that everything is going wrong, I think about meeting you soon. When it seems to me that this long working day will never end, I think about meeting you soon. Only thoughts of you give me the strength to productively complete the work, since my only desire today and always is to be in your arms.
  • When you are next to me, a flame of love flares up in my soul, which warms me in any weather. You are my world, except for which I do not want to see and know anything. I love you
  • I miss your eyes, which look at me with tenderness. I miss your arms, in which I feel protected. I miss your lips, which kiss so sweetly that it seems that you can die of happiness in such moments. I miss you so much. I miss and madly love you, my sun!
  • I didn't go to work, the gym, or shopping today because I wanted to spend the whole day with you. I know you didn't ask me to. But the day without you drags on unbearably long, like an eternity. And I want that in the concept of "eternity" we were always close to you. I love you!

Delicate words in prose

Beautiful words to a beloved man can be expressed in poetry, prose, quotations from literary works and films, can be formulated in a humorous genre.

Or they may sound extremely simple and short, but go from the heart, touch the soul.

  • I want to tell you what I just recently realized. Probably, this will be a discovery for you, and to be honest, I could not admit it to myself for a long time. I love you. Love like crazy. I love how you look, how you behave, I love how you talk, I love how you laugh. I love everything you do for me. In each of your actions, I see a real man with whom I want to be with the rest of my days. Thank you for having you.
  • Dear, I am grateful to you for the fact that you appeared in my life and overshadowed everyone and everything. Sometimes I forget about myself, my friends, work, problems, but I never let you out of my thoughts for a second. Perhaps this is love. Thank you for this feeling in my heart.
  • It seemed to me that I had already said all the words about love to you. But today I realized how great the potential of my feelings for you is. It doesn't dry out. I am incredibly grateful to fate for the fact that you appeared in my life. I do not need gifts, loud words and promises from you. I see your love and care in your every action and word addressed to me. I see your serious intentions in your every action. I appreciate everything you do for the relationship and I am ready to help in everything. You are my happiness. Thank you for having me.

Short sms to husband, boyfriend

SMS have become an integral part of modern life. Using mobile messages, it becomes possible to remind a spouse about buying food, to congratulate relatives on the holidays, or to express love and tenderness to a husband or boyfriend. It is convenient to write this kind of message if a loved one is on the road, at work or in any other place where it is inconvenient to talk using the phone.

Seeing a cute SMS, he will surely smile, remember the second half.

  • Hello dear. Sorry to distract you - I just miss you madly. I want to tell you once again that you are the best husband in the world. You are my greatest gift of fate in this life. I love you very much. I'm waiting at home.
  • I don't need gold jewelry and diamonds. These are just ordinary trinkets. You are my main decoration. After meeting you, I bloom more and more every day. It's your merit. I look forward to the evening to kiss you, darling!

Touching words about love in the distance

Life can make lovers test their feelings. There are situations when a man and a woman are forced to live at a distance for some time. True love will surely pass such a test.

To brighten up the circumstances, it is necessary to constantly give each other gentle words, even by phone or SMS.

  • Dear, let after reading this message, you feel my feelings for you, despite the distance. Your love keeps me warm, even when you're far away. These kilometers between us do not mean anything, because every second I think about us and about the happiness that will cover when we are finally close.
  • It doesn't matter to me at all whether you are far away or near. I feel your love. I know how strong my feelings for you are. And this is enough of our love. I live for you. Waiting for our meeting!

Beautiful words "miss you"

At a distance, it is worth emphasizing more often how dear a beloved man is, sincerely admitting that separation makes you miss a dear man. This is important, since it is pleasant for any person to realize that they are missed, they think of him, being hundreds of kilometers away.

Such behavior will be another proof of love, not left "unappreciated" by a man.

  • Before meeting you, I considered myself a strong and independent woman. I was sure that I could control everything, even my feelings and emotions. But now I realize that I can't bring myself to "miss" you. I miss and will miss you every second of our separation, because you are the most important thing in my life.
  • I can't concentrate on work, everything seems to fall out of hand when you are far away. All the circumstances are against me, because I miss you madly. All thoughts are occupied only by you. I'm sure everything will work out as soon as we see you. Darling, please come soon.

Gentle words in compliments

You can express warm feelings to a man not only with beautiful confessions, but also with unobtrusive compliments. It is appropriate to note the character traits inherent in a man, to emphasize masculinity, intelligence.

It is important for a man to confirm his strength, to acknowledge his superiority.

  • With you, I can relax and allow myself to be weak. Thanks for your reliability.
  • Only your witty jokes can make me smile, even when I'm in a bad mood.
  • It's amazing how you didn't get lost in such a situation and continued to act. I am sure that, being in your place, I would have lost heart.

How not to overdo it with tenderness

A woman, who creates a favorable climate in the family, needs to support the "half", help with deeds, "warm" with words. It is important for a beloved man to hear beautiful words that confirm the girl's strong feelings, expressed in her own words.

We must not forget: there must be a measure in every component of family relations.

Men spoiled by gentle words, as a rule, cease to appreciate the actions of a woman for them, become selfish in feelings, demanding, not ready to work on relationships. It must be remembered: in a couple, both parties should take an equal part in creating comfortable conditions for the other half.

Video: beautiful words to your beloved man

A touching declaration of love:

Beautiful declarations of love for a man:

You may be afraid that someone will be upset or embarrassed if you tell that person about your feelings. However, hiding them can lead to anxiety, depression, resentment, and even physical illness. In addition, you may have problems in personal and work relationships. By learning to express your feelings, you can better understand yourself, which will contribute to your physical and emotional health.

Steps

Awareness of your feelings

    Admit your feelings. Before you start doing anything, you need to identify how you are feeling and accept those feelings. Understand that there is nothing wrong with feeling something. Feelings are neither bad nor good. Feelings are just there.

    • When an emotion comes to you, don't be angry with yourself. Better to say to yourself, "Yes, I can feel it, and that's acceptable."

  1. Analyze how your body responds to feelings. Feelings come from emotions, and emotions are controlled by the brain. Pay attention to physiological responses. For example, when you are scared, you may sweat a lot, and when you are ashamed, your face may turn red. If a person is angry, his heart starts beating very quickly. Analyzing your body's responses will help you work with your emotions.

    • If you find it difficult to understand your body, try to find a quiet place, relax, and take a few deep breaths. Repeat the phrase “What is this feeling?” To understand what reactions arise in response to each emotion.

  2. Examine the words used to describe feelings. If you don't know the right words, it can be difficult for you to express your feelings. Try looking for special lists with names of feelings that reflect different shades of emotion.

    Ask yourself why you are feeling something. Ask a few questions starting with "why" to get to the root cause of your emotions. For example: "I feel like crying. Why? Because I'm angry with my boss. Why? Because he insulted me. Why? Because he doesn't respect me." Keep asking these questions until you get to the main problem.

    Divide complex emotions into simple ones. Very often, a person experiences several emotions at the same time. It is important to separate them from each other so that it is easier to deal with each separately. For example, if a relative who has been sick for a long time dies, you may be upset about the loss, but you will be glad that the person no longer needs to suffer.

    How to express your feelings to other people

    1. Use the pronoun "I". When talking about your feelings, it is better to use the pronoun "I" because it connects your emotions with you and does not make the person feel guilty about your feelings. Saying "You make me feel ..." will shift the blame onto the person you are talking to. Formulate the thought again: "I feel ...".

      Start talking about your feelings. Discussing your feelings with someone can be scary. If you decide to talk to someone about how you are feeling, start the conversation with pleasant words about the other person and your relationship with them. Then move on to self-statements and be honest.

      • People close to you can also help you look at the situation from a different angle. This is a good source of information to help you work through your feelings.

    2. Listen carefully to the person when they are talking to you. Mutual interest is important in communication, so you must be able to listen when people talk to you. When someone tells you something, give that person your full attention (put all devices aside!), Nod your head and respond to certain phrases.

    3. Take deep breaths. Take a deep breath before reacting with emotion. It is a great way to relax and reduce blood pressure, and it has been scientifically proven. If you take a couple of breaths before you react, you can free your head from unnecessary and consciously express your reaction.

      • To get the most out of the exercise, do it three times a week.

    4. Surround yourself with positive people you trust. People are social creatures, and we adapt to situations. If you are surrounded by people who speak unflatteringly about others, you yourself will think negatively. If you connect with positive people, you will feel comfortable and energized by others. The people you keep close to you form an environment in which you can either succeed or fail. Having trusted friends will make it easier for you to express your feelings in their company.

      • Choosing friends is a long journey of trial and error. Choose people who inspire, support, cheer you up, and energize you.

    5. Seek professional help if you find it difficult to express your emotions. If you find it difficult to talk about your feelings, this does not mean that something is wrong with you. You may find it helpful to talk to a therapist about feelings and how to express them. The help of a specialist will allow you not only to learn how to express feelings, but also to get to the problem that prevents you from doing it.

      • Look for a therapist in your city, read special sites, call the hotline, or talk to a clergyman.

    How to express your feelings in private

    1. Meditate. Meditation is a good tool that allows you to channel energy in the right direction and calm down in times of stress and anxiety. Find a quiet and peaceful place where you can sit. Begin breathing in and out normally, and then inhale deeply and slowly through your nose. Let your chest expand as your lungs fill with air. Then exhale slowly through your mouth.

      • As you breathe, think about each feeling, the reasons for it, and how you want to respond.