As you know, families are of different types. In some, the opinion of the husband is considered the only true one, he must be respected and unquestioningly obey him. In others, everything happens the other way around: a woman, as a continuer of the family, is the main authority. And yet the most common until recently was the first of these types - patriarchal. Let's talk about it in more detail.

Interpretation of the term

The patriarchal family is a cell of society dominated by a man. It usually consists of several generations of close relatives who live under the same roof and share a common life. During the time of Ivan the Terrible, one of the ministers of the church wrote a "guide" on how to competently manage the household, build relationships in the family. This book became practically a set of laws, immutable rules that family members had to follow. It was called "Domostroy" and included many instructions and even restrictions, most of which were intended for women. Men were given some freedom.

The patriarchal family is one of the oldest forms of unity of people. In fact, it represents the dependence of a wife on her husband and children on their parents. The dominance of a man is explained by his role in the family. He is the earner of livelihood, and the wife only organizes life. Children are brought up in strictness and respect for their parents.

Features of this type of family

Let us denote the difference between the patriarchal family. Its signs are as follows: the supremacy of a man, the economic superiority of the head of the family over his wife, and a clearly defined division of male and female responsibilities regarding the organization of a lifestyle.

In such a unit of society, there can be no question of spouses exchanging roles. For example, a husband will never run a household, and a wife will never work.

There are some other features that distinguish the patriarchal family. These signs are based on the fact that after the wedding, the son brings his wife to the house. Newlyweds do not live separately. They become part of a family where the authority for them is the head of the family - the oldest man of the family.

It is this type of social cell that is built on respect and reverence for elders. It is not for nothing that in all countries where the traditional patriarchal family prevailed in different historical epochs, councils of elders often met to discuss all pressing problems.

Functions of this type of family

Let's move on to characterizing other features of this type of social cell. The patriarchal type of family performs many functions. These include reproductive, educational, ideological and others. But one of the main ones is the economic function. She was the foundation of the family's survival.

Economic efficiency was achieved through the complete subordination of the wife to her husband. Often the personal desires of family members and even feelings were not a priority. The main goal was to achieve and maintain financial stability. A large number of people living under one roof contributed to the harmonious conduct of the household, as well as making more profit.

The patriarchal family is one of the most stable cells of society. Changing feelings for a partner could not be a reason for divorce. This type of family was especially characteristic of the Christian worldview. Those who were going to get married sealed their marriage vows in the church and believed that they were responsible for it before God. Thus, divorce was practically out of the question.

The current state of the patriarchal family

In post-industrial society, the patriarchal family has practically ceased to exist. This is due to the emancipation of women, the ability to earn money on their own, to be economically independent from men. Because of this, the norms of marriage and the functions that spouses perform in the family have changed. The attitude of children towards parents has also changed. Increasingly, older family members face disrespect.

On the other hand, the development and change of social foundations brought to the fore the role of the individual. Each person has become more valuable regardless of the people around him, everyone has the opportunity to achieve what he wants. Today, an individual through his activity can change his own social status, which was impossible a few centuries ago.

Such a unit of society, which is inherent in maintaining strong family ties with other generations, is a group of people consisting of a husband, wife and children.

In such unions, the man plays the main role: he makes decisions, provides his wife and children with everything necessary and has the right to the last word..

Consider what caused patriarchy in the past and why it remains in some marriages to this day.

Firstly, for a long time, under equal conditions, a man could get more food for himself. Due to her daily activities, a woman could hardly go hunting or work in the mines. Since the husband brings food home and provides for the children, then he will get the right to vote in all important decisions.

Secondly, one of the reasons is the transition from a traditional to an industrial society. Who could work more in production? That's right, men. The specificity of the attitude towards a woman could not allow her to dominate. At that time, even education for the “weaker” sex was almost impossible. Only ladies of the upper classes could be trained if they so desired.

At the beginning of the 20th century, women openly began to fight for their rights. It is not for nothing that we celebrate International Women's Day on March 8 - on this day in 1908, the first rally on equality took place in New York.

Today in Russia, according to statistics, the traditional type of family prevails over the partner family - many believe that respecting a man, giving him a leading role in marriage means respecting the history of past generations.

Signs and characteristics of the traditional patriarchal model of the family

Let's see what characterizes this type of marriage. Since the wording of traits is vague in many textbooks, we have prepared for you the most complete list:

• A man is the bearer of moral authority, and therefore is also responsible for the honor of the family.

• Society does not condemn and protects the right of "property" of the husband over his wife.

• A man is almost completely responsible for a woman and children.

• The husband financially provides for his wife.

• Parents instill in their children a love of work and responsibility for their actions from an early age.

• The head honors and respects his wife, and she respects him.

Patriarchy has both positive and negative sides. However, with all the shortcomings, the advantages outweigh - there are practically no divorces in such marriages, children and the elderly are always provided for, as this is considered one of the traditions of such a society.

The following eloquent example will help to trace the characteristic features of a patriarchal type of family.

It's no secret that the couple of Nikita and Tatyana Mikhalkov is considered very strong - still, more than 40 years of marriage, children, grandchildren. Today's generation has a lot to learn from the older ones. Nikita showed his stately, strong-willed character to his future wife on the first date. At that time, young Tanya worked as a fashion model and was seriously thinking about a modeling career. A whole group of friends gathered the girl for their meeting - she put on bright makeup, made a rather provocative hairstyle. As soon as Nikita saw her, he immediately took the person to the toilet to wash.

However, Tatyana was far from offended by such behavior, it made her convinced that Nikita sees in her not only a beautiful appearance, but also a rich inner world. After the wedding, Mikhalkov insisted that his wife quit her modeling career and take up the hearth, - Tatyana relented.

This example shows that a powerful, strong and traditional man is able to create a strong long-term union. However, the examples do not end there. We will look at a few more famous marriages, but a little later.

Types of patriarchal family structure

Our observations made it possible to distinguish the following types of traditional alliances according to the degree of alignment of forces:

With tight control

In such a cell, nothing is done without the knowledge of the husband - whatever you say, it should always be as he decides. This species is rarely seen today, as it was common in the 18th-19th century. Now total control is found only in very religious unions, including Muslim ones, or in third world countries.

Respect and reverence for men

This position is defended by our Orthodox Church. A woman also has her weight in history, but the dominant position of the hero and protector is always performed by a man. Such a marriage is harmonious in itself, as it performs its function - the upbringing of a harmonious personality in a calm environment.

The power of the husband may not extend to all spheres of life.

Then the families in which partial patriarchy reigns are divided into:

• those in which a man manages the financial part;
• those in which the husband is responsible for the honor of his wife;
• those in which children are raised by men.

What does a strong traditional marriage mean, Vladimir and Tamara Vinokur can show by their example. Their union has already been exchanged for 4 dozen - and it all started when both were only in their twenties. Work brought them together, however, despite Vova's courtship, Tamara was adamant at first, she refused everything. After some time, they did get back together. Marriage was also difficult, the situation was painfully ridiculous: the theater in which Tom worked required a Moscow residence permit, and therefore she offered her loved one ... a fictitious marriage. Vladimir insisted on his own - and here he is, a happy example before us.

Such unions can be attributed to the second type of our first classification, where a man consults with a woman, but still makes the decision himself.

Features of the norm of raising children in a patriarchal family

The upbringing of children in such unions is considered to be strict, but fair - the child is instilled with the values ​​of modern society from childhood, but based on the respect of the previous generation.

Here are some tips for communicating with a child that are used by patriarchal parents.

Always take responsibility for yourself and your actions

Do not give the child the right to decide for the parent. For example, you want to punish your son for spilling sauce on his new pants. No need to ask what you do with it - even as a joke. A parent is a model of behavior for a child, and therefore follow your authority.

Make time for rest

Parents will be able to raise a child in a calm atmosphere only when they put themselves and their thoughts in order. Your emotions directly reflect on children.

Do not transfer your problems to children

Hard day at work or bad shopping? You do not need to express your negative emotions in front of a child, it is even worse if you simply decide to take everything out on him. It is easier for you in this case, and worse for the children. Yes, it is not easy to catch such situations at first, but you need to develop the habit of constantly analyzing your words - it will be much easier to get used to it.

Let's choose when it's necessary

In order for your baby to grow up to be a free independent person, you need not only to instill family values, but also take care of his own choice - whether it be candy or filling for pies. If you do not want to get an ungrateful child, then from childhood accustom children to the desire to decide something on their own.

Refer to the experience of the previous generation, but do not forget about modern values

The best way to raise a worthy person is to transfer into his behavior those traditions and values ​​that your family has adhered to for centuries. Do not forget that you are the successors of history, and therefore you can bring something new into it. When the child grows up, he will thank you for the right upbringing.

And we offer to help you with this. The family tree is the embodiment of the traditions of your family, its noble history. Our specialists will not only create a Pedigree Book according to your wishes, but will also help you fill it out.

Let the child feel that he is absolutely free

The family of the patriarchal type is characterized by imperious concern for their loved ones. That is, this is a situation where it seems to the child that everything happens according to the "laws of the streets", although in fact you yourself are completely and completely in control of the circumstances. In this case, the child's behavior may vary: he will either go with the flow, or he will begin to actively fight the existing situation. In the first case, the child must be saved immediately, otherwise trouble is inevitable. In the second, it is worth observing and at first maintaining the position of a peacemaker. Especially when the child trusts you and tells all the secrets.

Many social science textbooks say that a patriarchal family is characterized by a sign of total surveillance of the wife and children and is characterized by control over all processes in the house. However, this approach has become obsolete and can be detrimental to marriage.

Examples of the patriarchal family model and parenting abroad

We have already given examples of happy patriarchal marriages of compatriots. And what is going on there, on the other side of the world? It turns out that overseas there are also examples of traditional families in which a man plays a leading role.

The personality of Arnold Schwarzenegger is known to many: bodybuilder, actor, politician. And what about this man with women? He met his only one at a charity tennis tournament back in 1977. Maria, the niece of that same John F. Kennedy, refused her boyfriend for a long time, and finally gave up. The couple have been together for 25 years and have four children: 2 daughters and 2 sons.

According to rumors, Arnold, being on the set, cheated on his wife. However, no one has ever made a scandal out of this scandal for relatives, and Schwarzenegger himself did not leave his missus with the children. Which, in fact, characterizes the traditional and patriarchal type of family.

Michelle Pfeiffer, famous actress, and TV producer David Callie have been together for over 20 years. Their fate brought them together at a party with friends: they were both delighted with how similar their views on raising children are. It was this topic that brought the couple together. Michelle often notes how her husband is firm, straightforward and sincere - this, in her opinion, should be a real man.

A love story more than half a century long will be told to you by the incomparable Italians Adriano Celentano and Claudia Mori. It started with broken light bulbs, wounds and guilt. For a long time Adriano, already a well-known actor at that time, would have courted an actress who had not yet become famous, if not for the occasion. After the wedding, Claudia supported her husband in everything: there was a time when Celentano mortgaged his house for the filming of the film. However, the wife believed in the success of the film, and then together they celebrated a win-win game.

Sting and Trudy Styler. She is a popular TV star, he is a talented singer. History is silent about their first meeting, but both spouses claim that it was love at first sight. They hid the novel for a long time - away from the gossip and gossip of journalists. They have been together for almost 40 years - a significant date! Trudy never put pressure on Sting, always supported him in everything. It was she who became the starting point, thanks to which the singer changed for the better. They scheduled their wedding after 10 years of relationship. Truly one of the traditional marriages.

These examples make it clear what a traditional patriarchal family is, how it differs from others, how it is characterized and what features it has. After the studied article, it is important to conclude that such a marriage is built on mutual respect, recognition of the authority of the husband and boundless patience and love. Most often, it is this way of life that helps to overcome new numbers and celebrate anniversaries.

Quite often, in all exams, the concept of “patriarchal family” is encountered. This is not a coincidence: to distinguish this type of family from all others: a partner, for example, is required constantly at exams both at school and in a college or university. Moreover, the material is not as complicated as it might seem at first glance. In one of the previous articles, by the way, we analyzed the nuclear seme

Definition

The patriarchal family is a small social group based on kinship, traditions, common economic and living conditions, as well as on the primacy of the masculine over the feminine. She is also an extended family, when many relatives lived under the same roof.

This type of family is typical for a traditional society, as well as for a transitional to an industrial one. The latter is more typical. Why did the masculine prevail over the feminine? There were several reasons for this.

Firstly, the existing way of managing made it extremely difficult to obtain food. Therefore, it was only possible to survive together.

Secondly, who, other things being equal, will get more food: a man or a woman? Of course a man. I understand that now there are a lot of such “men” who are more like women. And there are enough women who look like men. But this is today, when food is full in stores. But before this could not be: a stern man was a man and rightfully occupied a leading place in the family.

Therefore, to whom did the bride's dowry go? Husband. As the doctor of Tsar Alexei Mikhailovich, Samuel Collins (17th century), wrote, if a woman was convicted of treason, then she was simply buried in the ground up to her throat, and she slowly died. But if a wife convicts her husband of this, then when she went to court, she was first tortured. If he survives the torture, then he speaks the truth, then they were mistaken for a husband, but he usually didn’t have anything.

Samuel Collins also wrote in his notes that under an agreement between families on the wedding of the young, the bride's parents, concluding such an agreement, asked that the future husband, of course, although he beat his wife for decency and wit, but so that he would not beat him to death. The young people did not take any part in this, and they could see each other for the first time precisely at the wedding. From here came many Russian folk sayings: “To endure - fall in love”, “Beats - it means loves”, etc.

Violence, by the way, was the norm in such family groups, not only in relation to the wife, but also to the children. Here is an interesting excerpt from the work "Domostroy" by Sylvest (16th century):

« 17. How children teach and save with fear
Execute your son from his youth and give you rest in your old age and give the beauty of your soul and do not weaken the beating of the baby, otherwise God will not die with his rod, but you will be in good health according to his body, and deliver his soul from death, daughter of Imashi put your storm on them, keep me from the bodily, but don’t shame your face, but walk in obedience, but don’t accept your own will, and in unreason will spoil your virginity, and we’ll make you know it as a laughingstock and shame you in front of a multitude of people, if you give your daughter a shame, then as if you did a great deed and in the midst of the cathedral, boast at the end, don’t fast on the nude, loving your son, accelerating his wounds, but after him, rejoice in the execution of your son from childhood and rejoice in him in courage and in the midst of evil ones, boast and your enemies will receive envy, raise a brainchild with a ban and you will find peace and blessings about him, not laughing at him, creating games in small fears, weaken in greatness, grieving more, and after that, as if on edge, you create your souls, and do not give him power in youth, but crush him the rib will grow until it is too long, but if it is hard, it will not obey and there will be annoyance and illness of the soul and vanity of the house and death to the estate and reproach from the neighbors and laughter before the enemies under the power of payment and the annoyance of evil.

The passage shows that the constant beating of children was the norm. It was believed that then in old age the child would not forget you and would pay tribute to you. Corporal punishment was considered a charitable deed and the upbringing of the soul, moreover, its salvation! But under even greater suspicion were daughters - daughters. The devil is close to them like to no one! Therefore, it is necessary to teach her meekness and humility - again through beating. Oddly enough, but most people believe that assault is an absolutely normal thing.

signs

Thus, the patriarchal family is a small social group based on:

Ancestral traditions. Traditional consciousness is deeply mythological.

deep religiosity. In a traditional society, as you know, it is religion that occupies a very serious place in public life. The clergy class was one of the pillars of power in the brainwashing of believers.

The primacy of the masculine over the feminine. Other things being equal, it was the man who played the leading role in the prosperity of the family and in its provision. Another situation is considered for example.

Perception of a woman as a fiend of vice and chaos. No offense will be said to the fair sex, but the lion's share of the history of mankind, women have occupied a secondary place. Although there are people who claim the existence of a matriarchy, a matriarchal family, the basic historical concept is that this is not the case. It was patriarchy, men dominated throughout history, and even now there are remnants of this: does an employer, for example, look at a woman worker, just like a man? I leave the question open for discussion in the comments.

Women, however, were predominantly brought up in a spirit of meekness and from birth were doomed to occupy a secondary place.

In fact, children were not perceived as children. This happened only in very wealthy families, and even then not earlier than the 18th century, when a specific children's material culture arose: clothes, toys, etc.

There are a lot of nuances in this topic. Articles are good. But the whole and complete material is posted in my . And so, like, share material with friends on social networks.

Sincerely, Andrey Puchkov

Patriarchal and matriarchal family

Of particular importance is the typology of families, which contains information about the structure of power in the family, about the predominant family functions of men and women, about the specifics of intra-family leadership. In accordance with these criteria, the following types of families are distinguished: traditional patriarchal, traditional matriarchal, neo-patriarchal, neo-matriarchal and egalitarian. The first four types of families can be called asymmetric, the last type - symmetrical.

AT traditional patriarchal the husband is its indisputable head of the family, the dependence of the wife on the husband, and the children on the parents, is pronounced.

The role of “owner”, “provider”, “breadwinner” is assigned to a man. Male authority is recognized without question or accepted under pressure. The dominance of paternal authority is unlimited. The authority of other family members depends on their gender and age: the elderly are most revered, men have more rights than women. Clan interests prevail over individual ones. Therefore, such a family is called authoritarian-patriarchal.

A man makes a fundamental contribution to the material support of the family, manages its financial and economic resources, determines its status and social circle, and makes responsible decisions on the most important problems. He sorts out intra-family disputes and represents the family outside. Male sexuality is given an active role, this attitude is concentrated in the concept of "potency". The spouse is released from household duties. The wife is either a housewife or earns very little. The organization of normal life and consumption falls on her shoulders, and she is required to exemplary housekeeping, to create a cozy and comfortable atmosphere in the house. Her responsibilities also include looking after children and raising them.

In its classic version, the patriarchal family is briefly characterized as follows: the husband is the sole head and patron of the family, women's obedience is the wife's natural duty. Marriage was perceived as a state established by God, in which a man and a woman live together, in mutual understanding, giving birth to offspring and thereby avoiding fornication. Thanks to the consecration by the church, marriage in the eyes of society acquired the features of constancy and longevity. The vitality of marriage was determined by pragmatic goals: it allowed to strengthen the material position of the husband's family.

Famous patriarchal image- a virtuous wife. The social activity of a woman was limited to household chores and daily care for the spiritual and physical needs of children. Children should be brought up in obedience and piety. The best qualities of a woman were the recognition of a dependent position and the service of her husband in marriage. It is appropriate here to recall the native Russian words "get married", "married". The meaning of female sexuality was seen in childbearing. The spouse is a representative of the fair sex, possessing natural physical and intellectual strength.

This cultural stereotype was supported by religious and legitimate formulas of male domination, which localized the social space of a woman.

The hallmarks of a patriarchal family are patrilocality and patrilineality. Patrilocality consists in the fact that a woman follows her husband, that is, she settles in his father's house. Sons, married and unmarried, live in the parental home; daughters leave him only when they get married. This shows respect for the paternal family. In modern Russian families, the question of the place of residence of the newlyweds is decided much more freely. Patrilineality means the calculation of kinship through the male line. Consequently, wealth is passed on to the heirs of the male line, and the father has the right to decide whether to reward his sons or not. The fathers of families are still interested in the birth of boys, "the successors of the family", at least as the first child. This position of young Russian men is subject to the unconscious "pressure" of centuries-old traditions.

In science, there are conflicting views on the problem of the relationship between the patriarchal family, society and the state. Outstanding Psychoanalyst Wilhelm Reich in the work “Psychology of the masses and fascism” unambiguously expressed his point of view: “... an authoritarian society reproduces itself in the individual structures of the masses with the help of an authoritarian family ... In the person of the father, the authoritarian state has its representative in every family, and therefore the family turns into the most important instrument of his power. For sons, a deep identification with the father is the basis of emotional identification with any form of authority. In an authoritarian family, there is not only competition between adults and children, but also competition among children in their relationship with their parents, which can have more serious consequences.

According to another point of view, the patriarchal family protected the rights of the individual from encroachment on them by the state. Primary in it were the relations of spontaneous cooperation in the process of family production, thanks to which individual egoism was overcome. views Elton Mayo, one of the creators of the famous theory of human relations, can be attributed to the so-called neopaternalism.

The idea of ​​paternalism suggests that relationships in an enterprise, in a firm should be built on the basis of patriarchal, family ties, when the leader performs the function of a "father".

Up to the middle of the 20th century. traditional values ​​retained their influence both in Europe and in Asia. But the process of transforming the family into a “moderately patriarchal” was steadily gaining momentum. In the 1950s, in post-war Europe, there was a weakening of the dominant positions of fathers in almost all social strata.

Acceptance/rejection of the patriarchal model by contemporaries largely determined by the decrease in the social and economic dependence of the wife on her husband. At the same time, working women perform the vast majority of chores in the household and provide psychological relief to the husband and children. German historian R. Zider writes that the attitude of the wife towards her husband is still of a service nature: “As before, the satisfaction of the objective and subjective needs of the “main earner” has absolute priority over the needs of the wife and children. Patriarchy has not yet been overcome. In any case, however, the patriarchal basic relations of family members, which are essentially socio-economic and determined by cultural tradition, are overlapped by increasingly partner forms of address.

AT traditional matriarchal family personal headship belongs to a woman. Matriarchy, like patriarchy, did not exist among all peoples. But many nations have maternal lineage, for the reliability of the mother is objective. At all times, the mother played an exceptional role in maintaining family ties. The ability of a woman to regulate interpersonal relationships and use indirect methods of influencing others helps to win in the struggle for power. In separate families, with the formal leadership of a man in In fact, the dominant position is occupied by a woman.

If we are talking about Russian family, then the feminine, maternal principle is more pronounced in it. I.S. Kon recalls that Russian wives and mothers in the pre-revolutionary era were often strong, dominant, self-confident personalities. This is reflected in Russian classical literature: "He will stop a galloping horse, he will enter a burning hut."

Under Soviet rule, the “strong woman syndrome” was preserved and even intensified. Women bear the main responsibility for the family budget and the primary issues of domestic life. Typical for Soviet times is the image of a peasant with a ruble or a three-ruble note in his pocket, daily given out by a compassionate, but powerful wife. This is not the fault, but the misfortune of a woman whose husband brought home a salary, the size of which could have little effect. The wife had to contrive and “stretch” this amount until the next salary. She had to take the reins of government into her own hands. Such was the price of the stability of the existence of the socialist family.

The claims of a Russian woman to headship in the family can be understood on the basis of a general trend in the history of Soviet society - the trend of demasculinization of men. The most authoritative specialist in the field of gender psychology and sociology, I.S. Kon suggests that neither in professional activities, nor in social and political life, the average Soviet man could show traditionally masculine traits. The stereotypical image of a man includes such qualities as vigor, initiative, courage, independence, self-government. Social and sexual lack of freedom was aggravated by the feminization of all institutions and was personified in dominant female images: mothers, teachers, etc. Under such conditions, the strategy of transferring family responsibility to the wife was psychologically justified. From the deformation of the male character, the woman is unlikely to have gained anything. Where the husband rebelled against the power of the wife, she either endured rudeness and humiliation, or sacrificed her abilities and professional achievements. In a family where the husband accepted his subordinate position, the wife was deprived of the necessary support.

More harsh in their judgments V.N. Druzhinin:"... the dominant role of the Russian woman was imposed by the Soviet government and communist ideology, depriving the father of the main father's functions." Relations in the family in a totalitarian society become psychobiological, not socio-psychological. A man is deprived of social and economic opportunities to provide for his family and raise children, his role as the main agent of socialization is reduced to nothing. The totalitarian state assumes the entire burden of responsibility and replaces the father.

At the same time, the importance of the natural psychobiological connection between the child and the mother is increasing. Breaking this connection leads the family to disaster. Then the state and society are again forced to turn to the problems of motherhood. A “vicious circle of imaginary causes and real consequences” arises: “... in a modern Russian family, a woman wants (and is forced by the force of circumstances) to rule undividedly and completely. A man is not able to provide for his family, be responsible for it and, accordingly, be a role model.” Way out of the current situation V.N. Druzhinin sees in the creation of social conditions for the manifestation of male activity outside the family.

The division of family power is also realized in modern married couples. In order to prevent destructive conflicts, it is necessary that such a separation suits both spouses and contributes to the fulfillment of the family's functions. The traditional model of the family may be quite acceptable if the spouses' positions regarding the power structure are consistent. With regard to the family, the famous question of power is question of family leadership or, more precisely, headship. The head of the family combines both the leader and the manager.

AT neopatriarchal family the strategic and business (instrumental) leader is the husband, a tactical and emotional (expressive) leader- wife. The spouse determines the long-term direction of the development of the family, sets the priority goals for its existence, chooses ways and means to achieve these goals, formulates appropriate instructions and instructions for family members. He knows the current state of affairs well and foresees the possible consequences of the decisions made. It is the spouse who performs the role of the authorized representative of the family in society; the position of the family in the world around him depends on his actions. Extra-family activity of the husband (father) - professional, social, political, etc. - is encouraged by the household. The man himself has high claims in this area, is distinguished by a business orientation, pragmatism, takes care of the material well-being and social status of his loved ones. The worldview and life strategy of a man serve as a guide for all family members. He sets the style of family life and ensures its implementation. The younger generation sees in the father an example of strong-willed qualities and organizational abilities.

The father is impressed by the desire of children to express their opinions, a realistic assessment of people and events, and the successful mastering of independent activity skills. The wife finds life support in her husband, and his labor achievements become a source of pride for the whole family.

If a the spouse is responsible for long-term planning of family affairs, the spouse develops short-term plans, which are easily and quickly correlated with the specific actions of adults and children. The prerogative of a woman is to build everyday contacts between family members. It develops relationships of mutual assistance and cooperation. Being interested in increasing the cohesion of family members, she organizes joint events, the range of which can be extremely wide, from general cleaning and Sunday dinners to anniversary celebrations. Admire her competence in the intricacies of domestic life. She is also in charge of family entertainment. She is endowed with sensitivity to the needs and emotions of all family members. The wife corrects the psychological climate in the family, creates an atmosphere of emotional and moral support, develops her own leadership style and “support style”. The wife (mother) ensures the functioning of the family as an environment for emotional release. In a neopatriarchal family, the father acts as an expert for children in business and production issues, and the mother - in intimate personal relationships.

AT neo-matriarchal family is the opposite. A common feature of the considered variants of families - joint leadership of husband and wife in dividing their spheres of influence. Conflict in a marital dyad may arise as a result of an indistinct distribution of spheres of influence or claims of one of the spouses to a different role.

egalitarian family suggests full and genuine equality of husband and wife in all matters of family life without exception. The current Constitution of the Russian Federation and the Family Code of the Russian Federation declare the principle of equality between men and women, which is the legal basis for the development of an egalitarian family.

Husband and wife contribute (proportionately) to the material well-being of the family union, jointly manage the household, jointly make all major decisions, and equally take care of the children and their upbringing.

The role and importance of each of the spouses in shaping the psychological climate of the family is equal, the status of the family is established by the spouse who has a higher position. The circle of communication is formed by both spouses. This marriage is called biarchal, or cooperative symmetrical marriage. Being spouses means "running in the same harness." Apparently, it's more convenient to do it this way?!

In an egalitarian family, the principle of consistency in the positions of spouses takes on special significance. It is necessary to come to an agreement on a very flexible division of spheres of influence, on a high degree of interchangeability. Everyone should be ready to become a leader, business executive or educator. Differences that arise should be resolved through mutual agreements, compromises or mutually beneficial exchanges.

Children are full members of the family, as far as possible participate in the discussion and implementation of decisions. In their upbringing, humane methods are used, based on trust in the personality of the child, recognition of his rights. The initiative and independence of the child is encouraged, his needs for autonomy, development of individuality, and creativity are respected. Children who come from such families may tend to use a similar relationship model in their marriage.

The ideal model of an egalitarian family is presented in the concept of open marriage, according to which it is believed that in marriage each of the spouses can remain himself, reveal his abilities, and preserve his individuality. Spouses should not be "one body and one soul." Marriage is built on mutual attraction and trust, spouses do not seek to manipulate each other's behavior, subjugate their partner.

Principles of open marriage:

· One must live in the present, proceeding from realistic desires.

· Respect your partner's privacy.

· Communication should be open and based on the consideration: "say what you see and feel, but do not criticize."

· Family roles should be mobile.

· Partnership should be open: everyone's right to their own interests and hobbies should be respected.

· Equality is affirmed as a fair division of responsibility and benefits.

· You should give the other the opportunity to live according to his ideas; know your worth and maintain your dignity.

· Trust each other and respect extra-family interests.

The creation of an egalitarian union is a complex undertaking, since it requires, firstly, a careful and scrupulous description of the rights and obligations of the spouses; secondly, a very high culture of communication, respect for another person, mutual information and trust in relationships.

Some scientists speak of an egalitarian family as a conflict one: power functions are distributed, but their distribution is a constant ground for conflict. The egalitarian model in Russia is given the role of a transitional one. Its appearance is due to the growth of the economic independence of the family from the totalitarian state, the growth of the economic, social and political role of men. It is considered preferable for our country to have such a family in which, along with equality of rights, the father will take responsibility for the upbringing and maintenance of children, while maintaining other family responsibilities for the mother and children.

In Russia, younger and better educated men are more egalitarian and take on more domestic and parental responsibilities than was previously the case.

Bicareer family

The modern family in the industrialized countries of the world has significant potential for development bicarrier families. This is a type of family in which the professional interests of husband and wife are equally significant, and both spouses successfully combine the values ​​of creating their own family and building a career in their chosen profession. Such a family has a high level of integration and unity of value orientations. Spouses evenly distribute household duties among themselves, respect each other's professional plans, show mutual tolerance, readiness to provide assistance and support. Everyone knows that they can rely on a partner in any important undertakings.

Working and free time is used rationally, rest and leisure are organized in such a way that the resources spent at work are restored. Children express their involvement in family affairs, perform household chores, gain experience of cooperation with adults and with each other. They develop responsibility and independence. Children are well acquainted with the professional activities of their parents.

Bicareer family became a reality due to major changes in the social status of women. In the 50s, late 60s - early 70s of the XX century. in industrialized countries, the process of active involvement of women (including married women) in the sphere of productive labor began. In the FRG, 40% of women who married in 1962 at the age of 25 to 30 were employed. After 10 years, 48% of all married women of this age category were already working. By 1982, their share had risen to 59%. In the USSR in 1987 the total number of workers and employees was 50.8%. In 1938, only one in five Americans approved of a married woman working in business or industry, provided the husband was able to support her. In 1993, this type of woman was already approved by 86% of the respondents, although almost two-thirds still believed that the ideal family situation for children is a situation where the father works, and the mother stays at home and takes care of the children.

First, the growth of the economy has created a strong demand for female labor force. The share of women's professions is increasing, requiring high qualifications, satisfying the need for self-assertion, and allowing them to occupy a certain position, in particular, in the public service. Women's expansion is visible in the field of healthcare, education and culture, as well as in state and municipal administration. Secondly, more and more women do not want to limit themselves to the roles of a housewife and mother. Through their work, they seek to secure their own income, relative independence from their husbands, get satisfaction from self-realization in the profession, and expand and enrich social contacts. Girls and young women began to consider professional activity as an integral part of their own lives, having independent value, and not as a transitional stage before marriage and the birth of children.

Most of them intend to implement a "three-phase model": interrupt work for a while to care for children, and then return to work, combining it with family life. They take into account that the opportunities for professional growth after a long break in work are significantly limited. A woman of mature years is also interested in continuing her work, which can fill her life with meaning when the grown-up children leave their parental home.

Despite significant transformations in gender roles, "women's dilemma" continues to exist. This is a conflict of roles, a contradiction between a woman's professional employment and her intra-family responsibilities. First of all, it is necessary to state the fact that it was not possible to achieve true equality in the sphere of work. The female half of the population receives two-thirds of all working time and only one-tenth of the world's wages; Women account for only one hundredth of the wealth in the world. In the Soviet Union, women took lower paid and less prestigious jobs. Another typical image of the Soviet era is a woman in an orange vest, a railroad tracker or asphalt paver. Did you dream of such equality? During the transition of the country to a market economy, it turned out that entrepreneurs do not want to hire pregnant women and women with many children. In North America, young men and women are equally likely to graduate from college. For Japanese men, this probability is three times higher.

Family cares require a lot of strength, and it is difficult for a woman to compete with men. The increased labor activity of married women does not exempt them from cooking, daily maintenance of family members, caring for elderly parents, contacts with educators and teachers, etc.

The upbringing of children remains in the hands of women. Men strive for unlimited self-realization in the field of professional work, in which they invest not only personal, but also family resources. In addition, there is a prejudice, usually taken from the parental family, that men are less suitable for education than women, although it is known that for many centuries the father determined the social status of the child.

The triple burden of motherhood, housework and work acts as an obstacle to social and political activism.

Thus, the possibility of free versatile development of a woman's personality is called into question.

concept "women's dilemma" more complex in content and is not limited to the conflict of professional and family roles. it conflict of models of self-realization, contradiction between autonomy and service to one's neighbor. Some women try to copy the traits of a male personality, imitate the rationalism of men, which does not bring the desired effect, since equality does not mean identity. Many women strive for independence in order to break out of the imaginary captivity of emotionality in it. This leads to conflict, most women are tormented by the fear of losing love.

The formation of a bi-career family largely depends on the productivity of solving the "women's dilemma". This problem must be considered only in the context of gender interaction, taking into account the life positions of both the husband and wife, their interpretation of marital roles. If a woman is not burdened by household chores, then reproaches against her husband about his unwillingness to help his wife can be avoided. If a man encourages his wife's individual needs, including those related to extra-family activities, a woman's attempts to succeed both in her career and in the family will be more prosperous.

A number of factors should be singled out that can strengthen the position of a bicareer family. These include: the right and practical possibility of women's participation in public and political life; activation of men in the upbringing of children; rational division of labor in the household; increasing the social significance of domestic work; modernization of traditional role structures; formation of adequate gender professional and family roles.

The extreme version of the bicareer family suggests that professional or socio-political activities are more important for a husband and wife than family activities. Spouses can be engaged in a joint business. Their homework is kept to a minimum, redirected to specially hired people. A large number of household appliances, fast food products are purchased. Family members often take advantage of consumer service offerings.

Children are under the care of a nanny or left to their own devices, as they grow older they are involved in the family business. Spouses resemble business partners, each of them can pursue their own individual interests. Serious conflicts arise if these interests and needs are infringed. But more often family members, especially children, experience a lack of emotional warmth and attention. Therefore, parents who devote themselves to professional work should measure their costs and devote time to activities with their children.

In Russia, as in other countries of the world, the bi-career family model finds its supporters, although the tension in relations between people associated with gender mismatch persists. According to futurologists, in the information society, thanks to computerization, the family and the place of work will unite, family production will become the center of the socio-economic life of society.

The fact of the diversity of types of family and marriage is of direct practical importance for the psychologist. Our ideas about a “normal” or “exemplary” family have an unconditional influence on the entire course of work with a client. The point is not what types of families are more common, but what role they play in the development of conflicts and crises and what are their resources to overcome the difficulties that arise.

6. MODERN TRENDS IN FAMILY DEVELOPMENT

The family, being a social institution, is certainly influenced by society. The patterns of change in the family are co-directed by the changes that are taking place in society as a whole. Therefore, it is possible to understand the state of the modern family and assess the prospects for its further development only by taking into account the cardinal changes that have taken place in public life and in the mass consciousness throughout the 20th century. At the same time, it must be taken into account that there is also the evolution of the family, due to its own internal patterns of development.

Industrialization, the complication of production processes, urbanization, etc. have led to an increase in the mobility of the population, an increase in personal freedom, the emancipation of women, the emancipation of children from their parents, the complication of socialization methods, etc.

In general, the changes I.S. Kon stands for "the growth of the value of individuality in culture." At the level of psychology, this was reflected in the growth of self-consciousness, the increase in autonomy (and the need for it) of modern man. For family relations, this result is contradictory and cannot be assessed in terms of "good - bad": it solved some problems and created others. For a psychologist working with a family, it is necessary to know how the changes that have taken place in the mass consciousness can affect the psychological problems of the family as a whole and its individual members.

Since the middle of the XX century. there have been significant and irreversible shifts in the institution of the family. The changes that have taken place with the family are basically described by all authors as a crisis of traditional family foundations. There is a rejection of devotion to marriage for life, an intensification of divorces and the breakdown of marriages, a rejection of the stereotypical impartial attitude to the upbringing of offspring, an increase in the number of single-parent families and families with stepparents, a wide spread of abortions and out-of-wedlock births. Do these changes really mean a crisis of the family as a social institution, or do they concern only certain forms of organization of family life? To answer this question, let us consider in more detail the existing trends characteristic of industrialized countries, which include Russia.

At present, changes can be noted at all stages of the family life cycle, starting from its inception and ending with the completion of the existence of the family as a whole: at the premarital stage, throughout the entire period of family life, at the stage of family disintegration.

premarital stage

Marriage is no longer presented in the public mind as the only possible way to live life. This is manifested in the fact that there have been changes in the process of choosing a marriage partner, in relation to marriage and sexual behavior, in the system of values ​​in the field of gender-role behavior.

Changing the process of choosing a marriage partner. The process of selecting marriage partners has changed.

The study of ethnographic sources shows that at least until the middle of the XIX century. in Russia there was a custom of marriage through courtship and marriage. Matchmaking was carried out by special intermediaries (matchmakers, close relatives). Mandatory for marriage was the consent of the head of the family - the father. Marriages by personal arrangement between the bride and groom, without the prior consent of the parents, were rare. At the same time, the interests of the family were taken into account first of all - economic, domestic, prestigious, and not the desire or attitudes of young people.

In the second half of the XIX century. almost everywhere the premarital ritual is being transformed. There is a youth premarital communication. It usually takes place within the same social stratum. The purpose of premarital communication is marriage. Young people can arrange marriage themselves and notify their parents about it. Economic motives in creating a family fade into the background. Nevertheless, parents still act as defenders of the interests of the family as a whole. They participate in the planning and organization of premarital leisure activities (parties, birthday celebrations, etc.), focus on the family's expectations regarding the future of children. Quite often there is parental pressure on children to marry within their social class. Parents continue to interfere in relationships and disrupt unwanted marriages through the threat of economic sanctions.

In the second half of the XX century. there is a further strengthening of openness in youth communication. First, it becomes more diverse the composition of the participants. Now young people participating in communication can vary greatly in social, ethnic and educational indicators. Secondly, it is not limited by any spatial framework. Acquaintance is possible at work, in an educational institution and during leisure activities; a sufficiently large number of young people find a mate during summer holidays or under random circumstances on the street. Third, they change functions youth communication - now it does not pursue only the goal of marriage, but turns into relationships that are valuable for the individual. Boys and girls no longer see each partner as a future spouse, love relationships become valuable in themselves.

Thus, one can speak of increasing the share of individual freedom and individual preferences in the process of choosing a marriage partner and entering into marriage.

Presumably, this can be regarded as a positive, marriage-stabilizing trend. But at the same time, one should not assume that boys and girls are completely independent in their choice from their parents and their immediate social environment. Parental programming in the field of choosing a marriage partner is preserved. It becomes less frank, in connection with this - less conscious, and this can contribute to the formation of intrapersonal conflicts to a greater extent.

The removal of economic, social and national barriers expands the circle of potential acquaintances and, as a result, increases the possibility of choosing a marriage partner. But the simultaneous individualization of a person causes the opposite trend - the growth of mutual claims of men and women to each other, which leads to a more thorough and lengthy process of choosing spouses and less satisfaction with the result of this choice.

Changing attitudes towards marriage and sexual behavior. The modern attitude to marriage and sexual behavior differs significantly from that which existed half a century ago. The first important point of this change can be called rethinking the importance of sexuality.

Rethinking the significance of sexuality means an increase in its value and significance for the individual. Sex is perceived as a source of pleasure, and sexual attractiveness is perceived as a valuable personal quality. This is manifested in changes in sexual behavior. Firstly, it goes more and more openly beyond marriage- sexual relations are now possible both before marriage and outside of marriage. Second, sexy becomes equally important for both men and women. Women, just like men, yearn for sex, want to have sexual relations, and do not consider them as a duty that they need to fulfill in relation to a man. As a result, it is becoming widespread practice of premarital sexual behavior of young people.

The premarital sexual behavior of young people is often pleasure-seeking as the main motive and is not connected either with marital interests or with the intention to have children.

In connection with the previously noted trend towards increasing autonomy, marriage is no longer considered as the only possible way of living life. A sufficient number of both men and women are not going to marry even if they want to have children. Many people postpone marriage to a later date, when a certain level of material well-being is reached and self-realization in the professional field takes place. The age of marriage partners is increasing.

There is a change in the system of values ​​in the field of gender-role behavior. There is a weakening of the normative imperative that prescribes marriage, the preservation of marriage, the acquisition of children, the restriction of intimate relationships within the framework of marriage, and the division of roles into purely male and purely female. This applies not only to premarital or extramarital sex, but also to sexual orientation. Attitudes towards so-called "sexual minorities" are becoming more tolerant, and belonging to them is less often hidden.

Another manifestation of softening of morals in relation to sexual and marital behavior is the widespread premarital partner ("trial", actual marriages) among young people.

Rigid criteria for evaluating the behavior of men and women as "decent - dishonorable" and "normal - abnormal" have disappeared. Modern normativity takes into account the personal originality of a person and the system of his motives to a greater extent than traditional normativity.

But it is premature to talk about the formation of a new regulatory system. The problem of finding criteria for assessing the morality of human behavior in personal life is extremely relevant. Pre-existing strict norms created clear guidelines for assessing the ethicality of one's own sexual behavior and the behavior of other people.

The absence of such norms in today's society presents young people with the difficult task of developing their own criteria at a time when their own egos are not yet mature, their sexual behavior is mature, and when their parents' norms cannot serve as a suitable basis.

A change in the value system in the field of gender-role behavior led to changing its traditional pattern. To a lesser extent, men are required to demonstrate strength in its various forms (physical strength, power, money, moral responsibility), and it has become more common for men to demonstrate softness of character and emotionality. It is not considered inappropriate for women to display initiative, ambition and willpower, and they are more often both open initiators of acquaintance with a man and an active party in the formation of relationships. As a manifestation of this, one can consider a tendency to change the ratio of the age of the bride and groom. If at the beginning of the XX century. more often unions were concluded in which a sufficiently mature and independent man married a girl much younger than himself, but now the proportion of marriages in which the husband is younger than his wife in age has increased significantly.

It should be noted, however, that changes in the patterns of sex-role behavior in both men and women can be associated not only with changing values, but also with violations of their formation in childhood due to the increasing prevalence of single-parent families. The presence of one mother in the family unreasonably expands the range of roles performed by her and deprives them of gender specificity. In this regard, the behavior of children who grew up in such conditions (both men and women) may also lose their pronounced sexual identity.

Summarizing and summarizing the described trends, we can characterize the changes at the premarital stage as follows:

• changing social norms regarding marriage and sexual behavior;

• reduction of the regulatory potential of these norms;

change in patterns of gender-role behavior;

· an increase in personal freedom and an increase in the manifestations of individuality in gender-role behavior and the choice of a marriage partner.

This exacerbates the psychological problems of choosing and accepting responsibility.

The happiness of a family largely depends on the principle by which you build it. Psychologists observe four types of families in our country (in this case, we mean complete families living separately from their parents). But even each of them has its own internal options.

patriarchal family type

The man is in charge. The man makes all decisions, nothing is done in the house without his knowledge. A man is a breadwinner, or at least tries to be one. With a patriarchal type of family, it is the husband who manages the finances, regardless of his and his wife's income. The woman in this family is the classic keeper of the hearth.

Patriarchal type of family: the husband is the breadwinner

A man is wealthy, earns much more than his wife, but at the same time they have common interests, common topics for conversation. They spend evenings and weekends together, watch the same movies, prefer the same brand of wine. Such a married couple, in the absence of great ambitions of the wife (psychotype - Altruist), is provided with a long and happy family life.

Patriarchal family type: golden cage

A man is wealthy, earns much more than his wife, but has very few common interests with her (in especially neglected cases, he does not have at all). Their lives practically do not intersect. They only go out together when etiquette dictates that husbands come to a party with their wives. The rest of the time - the wife goes to beauty salons or friends, the husband - to saunas, clubs, presentations. Meet in the evening in the kitchen or at night - in bed. This type of family will suit those women who do not expect anything from marriage other than purely commercial benefits (the psychotype is the Daughter, the Altruist, and it will be difficult for her to get along in the "golden cage").

Patriarchal family type: loser husband

The husband earns no more than his wife, or even less, but still considers himself the main thing in everything! A woman, as a rule, does not like this situation (if she is not an inveterate Altruist). Such a patriarchal family is doomed to conflicts. A woman does not like that her husband cannot provide for her, but at the same time he constantly commands. A man begins to develop inferiority complexes due to the inability to fulfill the duties of a provider. As a result - either a divorce, or daily quarrels and scandals.

matriarchal family type

The situation is the opposite of the previous one. The woman is in charge. A woman provides for the family, manages all issues in the house, including managing finances. In a matriarchal type of family, the function of the breadwinner is performed by the wife, not the husband.

Matriarchal family type: wallet keeper

The wife earns more than her husband, or they earn the same, but the woman still manages the finances. The husband gives his wife a salary, the wife paints the family budget for a month in advance. The wife decides to renovate the apartment, the husband begins to move the furniture. An ideal union for the Activist and the Altruist, or the Mother and the Altruist.

Matriarchal type of family: husband-household

The wife earns very well, fully provides for the family. The husband does not work, is engaged in housework, children and other life. Such a marriage is possible only with the union of the Mother and the Altruist. It is very important that such a state of affairs (renunciation of the role of a breadwinner) absolutely suits a man. Otherwise - again, an inferiority complex with all the ensuing consequences.

Matriarchal family type: Alphonse husband or alcoholic

The husband either does not work at all, or works, but spends everything he earns exclusively on himself. At the same time, he is not a householder, he lives for himself and for his own pleasure! A wife in this type of family can earn a little, but the role of a breadwinner is still on her. As, however, and the role of the guardian of the hearth. In this type of family, only Mother and Son can get along more or less comfortably, for them this is an option.

Partner family type

Perhaps the most acceptable option for most modern people, allowing you to adjust. Both husband and wife work. Someone can earn more, someone less - for this type of family, this is not essential. Relations are built on complete equality and mutual trust. A conversation in the style of "banging your fist on the table, shouting: I'm right!" does not pass here. Only a constructive dialogue in which both interlocutors are able to listen and understand each other to the end. The family budget is compiled by joint efforts, household duties are also divided in half. Only two Activists can build a partner family.

Unfortunately, psychologists and sociologists note that this type of family is still rare in our country. No, we have enough Activists, but family stereotypes, rooted in our heads already at the genetic level, are very disturbing. Banal ignorance of the principles of modern gender psychology - too. Yes, yes, times are changing and family values ​​and principles - along with them. You just don't have to be afraid of these changes.

Competitive family type

In this type of family, there is also no chief and subordinate. And it doesn't matter how much the husband and wife earn. No matter how much they earn, there will still be a constant struggle for power. A family war is fought daily for the TV remote control, for whose turn it is to take out the garbage or walk the dog today, for the opportunity to buy a new dress or a new monitor for the computer, for the right to visit friends / girlfriends. Competitive families are built on adrenaline, but not because of an excess of it (although this option is not excluded), but because of the usual inability and (much worse) unwillingness to negotiate and hear each other.

Self-centered psychotypes - Son and Daughter - are doomed to a competitive type of family. But, in principle, absolutely any family can slide down to it. The reasons are the same - the inability to negotiate and make mutual compromises.