What drives a man? Three main questions. If a man says that he has another - what to do

The most interesting and exciting in a relationship is the first weeks of communication. You do not know what he is, but you are terribly interested in everything. A lot of questions are spinning in your head, you are making plans for the future: is he able to send you to the Maldives, will he give you a new phone for your birthday, is this spacious apartment already his or does it have a mortgage hanging on it?

Men will not stop laughing at us until we stop considering every suitor as a potential husband. I do not see anything reprehensible in this! Why waste time on a guy who doesn't suit you according to any criteria. Not for this, my mother grew a berry, so that she would have fun with everyone in a row for a single breakfast in bed, and even tasteless, and even cold.

Thinking about the future is right, but sometimes we don’t understand men, not all those we meet even consider us as potential girls, we are for them for a while.

Where do goats come from or a girl for a while

Before moving on to plans for the future, you need to find out if it is possible. Do we need a new friend of our thoughts, feelings and emotions, or did he just decide to encroach on the spicy body?

For any girl, this, of course, is incomprehensible. Why the hell would a normal healthy man waste time on a girl if he only wants sex from her. There are plenty of other women around, let him find one that will be pleasing to both their lustful mind and depraved heart.

Here we underestimate ourselves. Men are sometimes primitive, he saw - he wanted. Yes, exactly you. He doesn't want to sleep, he doesn't want to eat, he just wants you. Yes, you can feel like Angelina Jolie or any other movie star.

Battle for the Commander's Body

Is it worth it to find out if a man likes you or does he need only one thing? You decide. In the battle for your body, he may fall in love, however, this happens quite rarely, but there is still a chance.

It would be unpleasant for me to know that a man does not like me, but it is only important for him to know me in an intimate capacity. This is very annoying. He would not have treated a girl like that, and even more so his future wife. There he will become a meek sheep, but with me it is possible in every way? Bad man, very bad.

Love does not love

But the worst thing happens when you fall in love. Who didn't have this? It is guaranteed that you yourself will launch active military operations to conquer it, but you will only meet such a powerful rebuff that you will then have to collect not only the body, but also the heart.

If you know in advance that a man does not like you, then it is much easier for you to decide whether you need him, and as a result, think over a strategy to conquer him.

The first sign. He is constantly busy

If your man is constantly busy, he does not even have time to call you - he does not love you. Don't be fooled, you can always find a few minutes to call back. Many men smoke and find time for this activity, why are you worse than a cigarette? Even if your man is a firefighter, policeman, superhero, supervillain or president, he will always make time to save one nervous system. He does not have to pick up the phone all the time, but you must always be sure that he will call back. If not, he doesn't love you.

Everything is good in moderation

It is worth mentioning those girls who like to talk for a very long time or call very often. In your case, not answering the phone is a self-preservation instinct. If a man says that he is working, then you should not continue the conversation. If you call 16 times a day, then there is no point in calling you back, you still show up more than once.

Sign two. He is not looking for a date

If a man, again, is busy: he doesn’t invite you on dates, doesn’t just offer to meet, but is content with talking on the phone, then he keeps you in reserve. You will only meet when he has no other options. As they say in the people, on carelessness.

If a man needs it, he will do everything to achieve what he wants. You probably know that even working around the clock, many guys are able to cross the city in the hope of seeing their beloved! Are you unworthy of this? Agree that you yourself would come if he called. Do you really believe that he is so busy that he only sleeps and works? He doesn’t have lunch, he doesn’t watch TV, he doesn’t play on the phone before going to bed, nothing: sleep is work.

Sign three. She herself was offended - she herself and goodbye

If you felt one of the previous factors of dislike, then you probably already managed to say something about this to your friend. How did he react? If he didn’t care, and you couldn’t stand it first and called back, then this is the third indicator that your “young man” doesn’t like you.

Any man understands perfectly well that if a woman is offended, then she just needs a little affection. Calling back is the minimum that absolutely all men who love will go to. They are not some kind of animals that will leave their girlfriend to suffer alone. And no matter who is to blame!

The eagle is a proud bird

If, offended, you said a lot of unpleasant words to a man: insulted him, started screaming, crying or rioting in other ways, then not calling is again a self-preservation instinct. You have not known each other for so long, but calling (and even more so dating) hysterical women who are able to endure the brain in the first weeks of dating ... this must be a kamikaze. What will happen next?

The fourth sign. He is not interested in you

You chat only on abstract topics. He doesn't care how you get home at three in the morning. He doesn't care about your plans, at least for the next few days.

If a man shows you that it is you who must adapt to him and makes you change plans in order to meet him, then he does not respect you. If he does not show any concern, then do not expect anything good. Do you think that the situation will change over time? Very in vain. At the beginning of a relationship, certain stereotypes are laid, if he doesn’t give a damn right now ...

Fifth sign. He is a cold-blooded macho

He is a handsome man, all women fall at his feet and he knows it. He loves himself. People like him don't give compliments, don't pay for you (and rarely for themselves), don't give flowers. You should be happy that you can bathe in the rays of his glory, his beauty, his divinity. He is incredibly smart and belittles your intellectual abilities, he is handsome and points out your flaws, he flirts with everything, but he came with you ...

Trust me, he doesn't like you. He needs a girl just like him. The one next to which he will feel ordinary. He will become dumber, kinder and more adequate. By the way, it’s not a fact that that one will be really very beautiful, it’s just that for him she will become that one. Unfortunately, it won't be you. The stereotype has already formed. You are the person next to whom he is even cooler.

Although…

Well, there's also the possibility that he's actually a notorious nerd who just completed a seven-year course in pickup and a six-year course in seduction. He was recently taught how to communicate with girls, and he wants to please you so much that he tries his best to be an alpha male.

Results

If you notice that a man does not like you, start thinking actively. If he somehow humiliates you or behaves unworthily, it is better to leave. I understand that girls are very fond of trying to change a man, to save a lost soul, but I generally keep quiet about the joy they get from conquering men. You must understand that a man almost immediately understands that he has met his love. His attitude towards the same will never be inappropriate. Even Richard Gere initially respected his Pretty Woman.

All the time with you. A characteristic sign of the presence of the desire of all lovers is to always be near a loved one. And at the very beginning of a relationship, when they are just starting, this is especially noticeable. This is the easiest way to determine how much a man is in love with you, and if he is in love at all.

If a man is clearly not indifferent to you, this will be expressed in:

A man will look for any excuse to see you;

- “randomly” end up in the same place where you are: a club, an exhibition, at a party;

It is not at all difficult for a man to cancel another meeting in order to meet you;

Organizes meetings in nature, in cafes, at the cinema.

Thinks only of you. Another suitable way to find out what you mean to men is to pay attention to how he behaves in your presence. If you are really dear to him, at a party, most likely, a man will definitely want to sit next to him. And if he is in another part of the room, then you will certainly always catch his loving look on yourself. When communicating with friends, most often the appeal of your object of love will be directed specifically at you, as if not noticing those around you.

Pay attention to words. How to know what you mean to a man by his speech? Most often, a man in love often says your name - now it is synonymous with the word "beloved", which lacks the determination to say out loud. Maybe his vocabulary is filled with diminutives "sun", "fish", "kitten" in relation to you. In your presence, a man is not rude, does not use obscene language, tries to monitor his speech so as not to cause negative emotions in you.

Notice behavior. How do you know what you mean to him by his behavior? And here everything is very simple. If with you the behavior of a man becomes strange, not the same as usual - you are definitely not indifferent to him. For example, he:

Laughs louder than usual or, conversely, tries to clearly hide his emotions;

Talks about his long-standing exploits or begins to show off;

Worried when his voice begins to tremble, breathing quickens when he rubs his palms, showing other obvious signs;

Looking for adventure, attracts the attention of others in order to show his best side.

Also, the real feelings of a man are when you give as much love as you receive. You don't feel limited in love. When a man is jealous of you, cares when you get sick, takes care of you. Your opinion is important to a man, he agrees to give in so that you are satisfied. In disputes with someone, he always takes your side.

If a man is interested in your life - what do you do, what are your worries, hobbies, this indicates that you mean a lot to him. When he rejoices not only in your virtues, but also touched by your shortcomings. He did not immediately confess his love, this suggests that he thought for a long time how to do this and what would be the right moment for this. Loves to kiss you. If signed in sms phrases - “kiss”, “love”, “miss”, “with love” or the like.

Afraid of losing you. A constant desire to touch you, look, have sex (although this can only be at the beginning of your acquaintance).

But the feelings of a man are subject to doubt when he does not want to let you into a certain part of his life. When you feel like something is missing. When he does not want to talk about past love, even if you told about yours. It speaks of distrust of you. If a man does not want to take care of you, or does not think at all when you really need help. When he decides everything himself, he does not listen to your opinion. He does not want to show you to his friends, or even drags you with him everywhere - to a bar, to football or fishing. If after the first or second meeting you hear a bunch of compliments and love confessions.

Here are some ways to find out what you mean to a man on a non-verbal level. As you know, men have many specific gestures, by which it is not difficult to guess his intentions. Most of these gestures are unconscious. It is important to recognize them correctly.

If the eyebrows are raised. When we have an object in front of us that attracts attention, our eyebrows unconsciously rise and fall. This happens regardless of age, anywhere, in a person of any gender.

Lips slightly parted. If a man's mouth opened a little at the moment when you met your eyes, it means that he likes you.

The nostrils are slightly dilated. When the eyebrows are raised, the mouth is open and the nostrils are reasonably dilated, this gives the face a friendly look. And the opposite state of the man's face suggests that he is most likely bored.

When a man stands straight, pulling his stomach in, he wants to show himself in all its glory. Feet shoulder-width apart, a sign of sexuality. And even if he sits with his legs spread, he shows that he has something to offer the lady.

A man's gaze stops at the pretty parts of a woman's body, thereby making it clear that he considers you as a sexual partner.

When the toes of a man's shoes point in your direction, he is interested in you. A man holds you by the shoulder or elbow, which means he wants to be sure that you will not get lost in the crowd and, most importantly, will thereby scare away potential encroachers on you, because you are already next to the man.

If he offers his sweater or jacket. It says, as it were, that for him “What is mine is yours”, moreover, this is a possessive, protective gesture of a man. And, finally, the man has a reason to appear on your horizon again, even if just to take his property.

Interaction with other people occurs at several levels. The first level is verbal, that is, communication through speech. The second level is non-verbal, which includes body language and gestures. And if we have learned to skillfully control the verbal way of communication, then the language of gestures is controlled purely by our subconscious. The richness of body language is in no way inferior to the richness of our speech. When we are excited, agitated, upset, annoyed or carried away, our body gives certain signals to the interlocutor.

Interestingly, both women and men have a non-verbal way of communication. Only in order to convey our emotions, we use different signals. It is very difficult to master the language of gestures and facial expressions thoroughly. At least, psychologists have been studying this art for many years, but then they manage literally from the first seconds, looking at the face or body reaction of the interlocutor, to determine his true feelings. Since the human subconscious never lies, we simply have to learn the basics of a man's body language in order to understand how he treats us. Moreover, if a man is interested in you, it will be immediately noticeable in his facial expressions, gestures and body movement.

10 body language signals of a man in love

1. He raises his eyebrows

If a man slightly raises his eyebrows at the sight of you and immediately lowers them, this indicates his interest. This fleeting movement simultaneously displays joy and surprise. But if during a conversation a man raises his eyebrows and is in no hurry to lower them, most likely he is skeptical.

2. He reaches out to you with his body.

When we like someone, subconsciously we tend to get closer to that person. For example, if a man sits opposite you and tilts his body slightly towards you, this means that you are attractive to him. You can also be sure of his sympathy if, while in society, he seeks to turn his body and shoulders more towards you.

3. He doesn't know where to put his hands

Hand movements very eloquently convey the feelings of a person. When talking to a man, watch his hands. If he randomly goes over something, shows his palms, touches his belt or pockets, this indicates that at the moment he wants to move the conversation to another topic and attract attention to himself. These gestures also convey embarrassment, which, as you know, occurs only in relation to people who care.

4. He touches his hair

For women, hair is a matter of pride. Therefore, when we unconsciously try to attract attention to ourselves, we begin to correct them, twist them, string them on our fingers, etc. Although men usually cannot boast of bright hair, they use the same signal to attract the attention of a person they like. If you see that the man in front of you has begun to ruffle or smooth his hair, know that he is preening so that you pay attention to him. A similar meaning is symbolized by touching the mustache or beard.

5. He goes to the beat with you.

The step of a man is much wider than the step of a woman. But if you are walking next to a man who is in love with you, you will not have to catch up with him with all your might, because. he will go along with you. By adjusting to your step, a man subconsciously demonstrates his interest and disposition towards you.

6. Mirror effect

According to psychologists, if you are not sure about the feelings of a man, when communicating with him, start gesturing and see if he repeats your movements or not. As a rule, a truly interested person will begin to unconsciously imitate your gestures. This effect occurs when a man's subconscious tends to demonstrate that he is your friend and will not harm you.

7. During a conversation, he makes eye contact.

Usually it is difficult for men to follow the logic of women's speech. But if a man is in love, he will literally listen to every word from your lips. If during your monologue a man looks into your eyes, does not make unnecessary gestures and does not look away, this indicates either his interest in you, or that you are a very good storyteller.

8. He gestures intensely

When a person is in a calm state, he uses a minimum of gestures. But if he is excited, excited or interested in attracting the attention of the interlocutor, his gestures become more expressive, brighter and more intense. If even at this moment a man suddenly starts talking a little faster than usual, do not doubt that he likes you. Thus, subconsciously, a man seeks to keep your attention.

9. He touches you

When communicating with a person who does not arouse any interest in us, we avoid touching him and keep our distance. But if you notice that during the conversation a man imperceptibly touches you, gives you a hand or holds while walking, this means that he is very interested in you. Tactile signals also indicate that he likes you sexually.

10. He speaks softly and hushed

The voice is the subconscious instrument of seduction. If a man needs your attention, he will speak softly and in a hushed voice, as if he is giving you a secret that no one else should know about.

In the early stages of dating, fear of rejection and embarrassment can "interrupt" body language. If you have a shy man in front of you, try to be the first to convey your disposition in a non-verbal way - show open palms, look into his eyes and smile. Subconsciously, a man will feel your mood, which will help him act more decisively and boldly.

concept "the one" or "The Only One"pretty vague nowadays. Is it possible that each of us is destined for only one person with so many connections and contacts?Yes maybe. Or maybe not.

But as soon as it meets on the path of life"the one" or "the one", this question disappears by itself.

I am often asked: « If a man says he loves, then why doesn't he do anything for me? » or "Capable can a man love? » . Yes, he can! But this does not always mean that he is ready to conquer mountains and strain for the sake of such love.

Do you want to know,how does a man understand that he met “the only one” that you want to protect, protect, provide ?

What does a man thinkbefore this meeting and after it?

I am sure that every woman wants to know about it.
After all, this will help to understand whether he really sincerely considers you his soulmate.
So get ready"get in your head" to your man. Now you will learn in detail about his 7 thoughts, which he carefully hides.

Thought 1.“I will move mountains, but I will fulfill her every wish”

Once a wonderful science fiction writer Robert Highline said one clever phrase:“Love is a state in which the happiness of another person is an integral part of your own” .

To do this, he will be ready to realize any of her dreams. And for him it does not matter how difficult it is to implement them.

What is the man thinkingwhen he wants to make you happy?He wants to become a knight in shining armor and, swinging his sword right and left, kill the terrible dragons that threaten his beloved.

But in real life, a man acts differently. It all depends on his capabilities at the moment. Yes, today he can take you to an expensive restaurant or take you on a yacht trip, make a valuable gift. But also his feelings for you, his desire to take care of the woman he loves, can be expressed in simpler ways. He may justtake care of you when you are sickmake surprises or indulge in your favorite sweets. Show attention and respect towards you.

Regardless of the magnitude and importance of such actions, they will always mean one thing - he considers you"the one".

Thought 2.“For her sake, I am ready to become stronger”

A man always strives to become the best version of himself, regardless of the state of the relationship in which he is. But when"exactly the one"a woman comes into his life, he has completely new motivations.What does a man think thereafter?

Now he is sure that he must try even harder to achieve his goals.After all, you become a ray of light on his gloomy life path and he wants to be proud of him.He will want to present you with an improved self.

So if you don't understand,what and how a man thinks, when once again he returns home late due to a visit to the gym or a delay at work, look at him and everything will become clear. If burning eyes and a strong kiss are the invariable components of each such return, then all this is for you. Don't get mad at him andHe needs a gym so that there is always a strong man next to his beloved woman.And delays at work will allow him to become more successful and start earning more in order to be able to satisfy all your needs.

Thought 3."Never before have I met such a beautiful woman"

How men thinkabout your lovers?
We love a woman for who she is. And everything about her looks great.
It is impossible to literally describe the emotions of a man when he sees the woman he has been waiting for all his life.
He loves her differently: just out of bed in crumpled pajamas and in a beautiful evening dress.
Every time the sight of her takes his breath away.What is the man thinking in this moment?
Absolutely nothing!

Realizing that the most beautiful woman in the world is standing in front of him, he is no longer able to think about anything!

Thought 4."I'm glad my past relationship didn't work out!"

This thought is exactlywhat is the man thinkingwhen he realizes that you"the one". Not, he will not complain about what he had before you. He will be glad that he had them. After all, with their help, he was able to prepare for a meeting with"the one".
And now he is an experienced man who knows what a woman can want, how to take care of her and how to make her happy.

Thought 5.“My personal desires are no longer so important”

What does a man think when he's alone?
“I want to get married and live with a single woman until the end of my days? So that she gives birth to me many, many children? .
Well, it's unlikely!
It's hard to want children if you don't know who their mother will be. It's hard to think about a family if you don't know who will be next to you.

What is the man thinking in the reality? Until the moment of meeting the woman with whom he is ready to link his fate, there were personal desires and goals in his life. They are simple and clear. And believe me, among them there are definitely no dreams of beautiful interior items or a new sofa. But, having met"that one" he understands that now it is necessary to realize the goals and desires that concern both of you.

Thought 6."I hope I didn't ruin everything"

Have you ever seen fear in his eyes because he did something wrong? Yes, a man can also worry that he is not strong enough and quick enough in making decisions! Agree that no one is perfect.

What is the man thinking at these moments?
That he must daily prove the seriousness of his feelings. That's why need it the way it is. You also need to tell him about it.
Of course, this does not mean that now he can sit on the sofa with a bottle of beer, turn on the TV and thus spend all the evenings that remain until the end of his life.
Not!

He may try to find a new hobby together, start going to the pool together, suggest making new bathroom shelves for your entire cosmetics collection.
And if something doesn’t work out for your man, try to support him. So that he does not even have thoughts that one of his failures can change your opinion of him for the worse.

Thought 7."I don't know how it happened, but I'm so happy about it"

Luck, fate, fate - the reason why he met you can have different names.
Sometimes it's impossible to explain how you met. They lived in different places (cities, and maybe countries) and until the moment of that very meeting they did not even suspect the existence of each other. Nevertheless, this meeting took place.

I don't know about you, butyour mandefinitely in the heartthanks fate for that. Believe me, it's true.

What to do with this knowledge?

I will not answer this question for you.You wanted to knowwhat and how a man thinkswhich is nearby? I told.
How you use this knowledge is up to you.

Do you want to know more about the features of male psychology?

Register for a free master class “Man: Honest Instruction” - a masculine view of women and relationships.

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Hello dear readers! Perhaps it has always been that way. Women have always treated with some distrust the words of a man. Now the situation has gone to extremes. We attach great importance to even trifles and are ready to dissect every word said by a man. What is it: suspiciousness or young people have compromised themselves so much that they no longer have any confidence?

“If a man says that he is bored, what can it mean?”, women in the company of their girlfriends bring up for discussion.

Today we will try to find out the answer to this question. What to answer the guy, does he really love and in this way is trying to show you this feeling, or maybe, but he is not in love at all yet, or in general in such a way for his own purposes known only to him?

There are so many questions to be sorted out, so let's get started without delay.

Meaning of words

If you have ever been in love, you know that even a minute of separation causes strong emotions. One has only to leave the date, as you already begin to miss your beloved, an irresistible desire appears to return, to stay together for some more time. It is possible that in his own words a young man shares these feelings with you.

Do not think that all young people are intriguers who think over their own actions and words. Sometimes men just talk and it doesn't mean anything anymore. Such representatives of the stronger sex exist. This is not a myth.

It may seem to you that in this way he hints that it is time to think about living together, but in fact he simply expresses what lies in his soul. Without any additional information. Don't jump to conclusions.

So why aren't you here

For many girls, it remains incomprehensible - how can he be bored, but at the same time he does not come? “We haven't seen each other for a week. So you miss you badly! ”, - of course, this is not worth saying to a young man. If you do not share the emotions of a man, then it is better to remain silent, and if you feel the same, then why don't you take a step towards?

The guy's words, although they diverge from his actions, do not mean that. Women give in to feelings and emotions by 100%. That's the way we are. If you have a desire, then it comes to the fore and everything else simply ceases to exist.

For men, things are a little different. They try not to forget about other things that are important to them. He may be bored, want to meet a woman, but at the same time he remembers that he must help his mother on the weekend, fix the car or write an important report.

More responsible. They want something from them since childhood: “You have to”, “You are a boy”, “You still have a family to support”. From an early age, a lot of demands are made to them: “Don’t cry, you are a man”, “Don’t do this to girls” and much, much more. Rejoice, your young man does not forget about his duties no matter what.

Women bathe in love, drown in it, give themselves to another person completely. Men do not let the voice of reason be silenced. Although, it happens differently. Everything is individual here.

Do not forget that all people are different and if you already had a young man who devoted all his free time to you, you should not try to adjust all subsequent people to this type and be offended that the new person behaves differently. It certainly has its advantages, which you will learn about a little later.

Read Kara King's book More than just beautiful". In it, you will learn about the twelve secret powers of a woman that no young man can resist. You will learn, become more self-confident, believe in your own sexuality, be able to make a man think that he is conquering you and much more, which will be very useful now, while you have not yet entered into a new relationship.

Follow your actions

If, despite everything, you still have some of his words that he misses you very much, you think that this is a banal phrase that he sends to each of his girlfriends, saying “I love-kiss-miss”, then it makes sense to pay attention to other indicators of feelings.

There are men who simply spread their vibes to all female representatives, calling them "suns", "cats" or diminutive names (Tanechka, Lyubochka, Zoechka), and the phrase that they are bored is sent automatically, just forgetting.

You should not attach great importance to just one randomly thrown phrase. Along with the words that a young man misses you, there must be other actions on his part - dates, or something else.

However, even if such words were said to you in passing, this does not mean that you have no chance. It may take a little longer, but everything is in your hands.

Another useful book that you may find useful is " One step away from love» Katherine Thomas. She will tell you how to find the love of your life in less than 2 months.

That's all for me. See you soon and don't forget to subscribe to the newsletter.