What to do if you are a mistress? If you are a lover. very many single women are quite satisfied with the status of a mistress. and in order to feel comfortable in this position, psychologists advise to remember simple rules

Tell him how wonderful platonic love is and offer him just such an inspiring kind of relationship. Tell me that this is a wonderful spiritual practice that gives joy and mutual respect ... In 5 minutes, a married man will disappear from your field of vision.

• How to make a married man think about you psychology

The best way to make you think about you is to flood a man with your intimate photos. You can also kidnap him, tie him to a chair and tell about yourself while he is immobilized. Thus, a man will think about you 24 hours a day!

• How to be the best lover for a married man

Take a notebook and write it down so as not to lose it, or better yet, learn it by heart. To be the best lover you need: always look great, smile and enjoy even 15-minute meetings. Never ask for anything, otherwise you will scare the man away, he may think that you need more from him than just sex. Do not write or call him, married people do not like it - you have to delete calls and SMS so as not to burn yourself. Do not show him your bad mood, put your jealousy of your wife in the box, put your desires in the same place. Your task is to do as well as possible for what they come to you for. And they come to you to...

• Why a married man does not call after sex

I don't even know what to advise. You don't think he's only with you for sex, do you? Married people are such busy people. Make a list of 100 excuses and hang it on the refrigerator so that it is always in front of your eyes.

• How to keep a relationship with a married man longer

• If a married man chose you as his mistress

That should be rejoicing! Well, what's the question? You need to thank God for sending you a married man "as a gift." You need to run and jump for happiness, not everyone is so lucky - to be a mistress. It is so honorable to be a secret woman, there is a special intrigue in this. Not like with a single man, everything is predictable there, she wanted - she called, she wanted - we met. Everything is different here. Here are secrets, expectations, hopes, deceit. Everything is like in a soap series!

• If a married man wants sex on the side and feeds his mistress with promises, what is it?

This is a married man. Did you think it would be different? Not every free man keeps his promises; I generally keep quiet about married men. Wanted to be a mistress - get and sign.

• What kind of sex should be with a married man?

I can assume that sex with a married person should be about the same as with an unmarried ...

The only thing is that often married men have mistresses for some sexual excesses that cannot be realized with a wife. So my site was hit by the request "married lover set the condition for anal sex or will not meet." Are you ready for this twist? And what, nothing is a pity for a married man, are you in vain a mistress? Just like in a joke:

Izya, I heard you married a Russian? - Yes... - Why? - You know, Jewish women often get sick... - And Russians don't get sick? - They get sick, but they are not so sorry.

• Karma of a married man's mistress

My favorite question. It turns out that someone is interested in what it will be .. Have you not realized that you have already fallen into karma? Try to get out of these relationships and you will understand that in order to break these relationships, you need to tear a piece from yourself. This is the karma that you voluntarily subscribed to - strong affection and the expenditure of energy, youth and beauty on a married man. And at that time they could be the only and beloved woman of their man.

That's all for me. Please take my advice with humor - it was an irony that exposes the truth. In my article, I strongly recommend not to contact married people and break off relations if this does happen. I advise you to get out of the flawed role of a lover, because every person on earth was born in order to be happy. Relations with a married man is a loss of valuable time, strength and beauty. And most importantly, the loss of faith that you deserve better!

P.S. Male look at the mistress. These are the words of a man!

“To be the mistress of a married man and hope to start a family with his lover / sponsor, that he will divorce his wife, leave the children and go to her??? You have to be a complete idiot to think so ... in fairness, I note that there are SOME cases ... everything else is either lust or sexual promiscuity or part of the image and the concept of "a woman's need for a family" has nothing to do with the concept of "lover "... the concept of "mistress" historically and a priori EXCLUDES the goal of creating a family ... by the way, life shows that nothing good comes of this ... YOU CAN'T BUILD HAPPINESS ON ANOTHER MOUNTAIN ... "

Diary of a psychologist - Dayana Mir

Why do many of us, dreaming of a magnificent wedding and endless family happiness from early childhood, end up becoming the constant mistresses of married men? Oddly enough, but for a fairly large part of the fairer sex, such a fate seems to be predetermined by fate itself. Of course, they are not to blame for the fact that by the time of the meeting, the beloved man was already married. Sometimes potential mistresses do not know about it, and sometimes they do, but, completely captured by their feelings, they attach little importance to the fact of marriage. And without resistance, they accept the status of "mistress of a married man", rushing into love, like into a pool. They decide to live for today, and then - come what may! And anything happens. After all, a man is married, and therefore not free, and he usually tries to build relationships with his mistress not to the detriment of his family. Not every woman can stand it. So how to behave if you suddenly (or not suddenly) managed to become the mistress of a married man?

What does it mean to be the mistress of a married man

Why does a woman become a mistress? After all, the trap of an affair with a married man is very insidious. After a romantic period of relationship that completely sweeps aside any sober reasoning, a bitter epiphany comes: “I have nothing to dream about, because he has another.” And a burning, unbearably painful jealousy wakes up. Otherwise it can not be. Yes, usually married men tell their mistresses that both physical and spiritual connection with their spouse has long been lost. But perhaps a completely naive lady will believe that the beloved has no intimate relationship with his wife. And his rightful missus has much more rights to these intimate relationships.

And yet - there are holidays that a married man spends with his family. There are calls from his wife during your meetings and his slightly guilty and rather gentle answer: “Yes, dear, I will be soon!”. There is a nervous glance at the clock at the most inopportune moment and there is much, much more ... All this screams from all sides: “He is not yours! You are just a constant lover, but not a wife! This fact becomes painful, and rare meetings no longer bring the satisfaction that was at the very beginning of the acquaintance. Somewhere inside, at first, it quietly matures, and then grows to a gigantic size, the question sweeping away all thoughts: “Will he get divorced or not? Does he really love or is he just playing with me?

It would seem that one does not have to be seven spans in the forehead to foresee such a development of events, risking becoming a real mistress of an unfree man. We will not talk about temporary, for one night, girlfriends of such men - if such relationships bring suffering, then in exceptional cases. And they are not considered as promising at all. So why should a woman complicate her life so much, comforting herself with ghostly dreams and often realizing that all her hopes are nothing more than illusions? And that the mistress of a married man can hardly be sure of a happy future with him?

Do married men leave the family for mistresses? It happens. But quite rare. And the point here is not that they do not have any feelings for women on the side. It happens that they experience, and even very strong ones. But even representatives of the stronger sex who are extremely in love with such a woman turn out to be weak if the issue of divorce from his wife is very acute. For many men, major life changes are tantamount to a natural disaster. And they do not seek to arrange it with their own hands. Therefore, in order for them to have the thought of whether to marry their mistress, the thought of divorce must first appear. In other words, a married man should be ready for a divorce even before meeting another woman. Otherwise, the question “should I go to my mistress?” will stand in front of him far from immediately, and perhaps never will.

So why, after all, do women so thoughtlessly rush into the arms of a married man, if deep down they understand that the romance will be difficult, and often unpromising? The reasons are different.

Types of mistresses of a married man

In general, there are several types of mistresses:

1. Mistress is a masochist

   This is a woman who is impressed by the position of the victim. In a relationship with a married man, she understands everything, accepts everything and agrees to everything. The masochist with sympathy, tenderness and love listens to the outpourings of a man about how unhappy he is in the family, while perceiving him as a noble and strong person. This is the ideal lover of a married man, who sincerely believes that her lover does not divorce his wife and endures "this mymra" because she feels obliged to her children (parents, a sick wife, and so on).

   She is convinced that “you can’t build your happiness on someone else’s misfortune” and is absolutely not going to destroy someone else’s family. A man really likes to play nobility with such a woman, and from time to time he leaves her so that she finally arranges her personal life. Being an ideal lover, a devoted masochist suffers a lot during such periods, but does not even think about trying to create her own family. And when the beloved returns, she again accepts him, shining with happy eyes. These are very convenient types of mistresses, relationships with which men can continue for many years.

2. hysterical mistress

   This woman loves thrills. Usually, hysterics include bright, self-confident, independent ladies who can easily arrange their personal lives. If they want. But they don't want to. They are adventurous and cannot imagine their life without risky situations, therefore they choose married men as the object of passion, and those who are able to constantly create these risky situations. The psychology of a lover of this kind is based on a high level of aggression, and she keeps her chosen one in suspense all the time, either flirting with someone in front of his eyes, or disappearing for several days, or calling his wife ... The fantasy of a hysterical lover has no limits, And she can throw out anything.

   An affair with such a lady is not for every man. Relations develop quickly and rapidly, without delays and equivocations. A lady with the psychology of a hysterical mistress is not capable of maneuvers - she needs a victory at any cost, and she goes to her goal over her heads. Numbers with a sense of duty and obligations to children do not work here. And the married women should stay away from her, and run headlong, but it doesn’t come out! Attacks of aggression in a hysterical mistress are replaced by attacks of incredible tenderness, and such a stick and carrot keeps a man cleaner than any waterfall of continuous caresses. But, since he stepped into a minefield, it means that he needed a powerful surge of adrenaline. And a married woman will be drawn to such a woman until he is completely exhausted. When that moment comes, no one knows. The most paradoxical thing about the behavior of hysterical mistresses is that if a married man suddenly sets out to start a family, they immediately break off all contacts with him. Because the object becomes uninteresting.

3. Lover-eternal bride

   This is a woman with a refined nature, unable to perceive the world around her pragmatically. She is looking only for the prince, and finds all his features in a strong, courageous, but, alas, married man, who strenuously plays the role of the one who needs the eternal bride. However, often he does not play this role at all. Just in a relationship with a mistress of this kind, any man involuntarily becomes indulgent. Otherwise it can not be. After all, she is so trusting and naive, and so reverent before him, that he always feels with her nothing more than a noble knight! The eternal bride, looking at him, experiences serious delight: here he is, her prince! And at the same time, he does not think at all about the fact that he has a family. And, by and large, she doesn’t care, because next to her is such a reliable, experienced and exalted man!

   In reality, the situation in relations of this kind is somewhat different. The lover-eternal bride is looking for someone who would take responsibility for her future. She cannot and does not want to make any decisions on her own, therefore, as a protective wall and support, she is quite satisfied with a married knight. The main life rules of the lover-eternal bride are the desire to prevent destructive reality from entering her fragile inner world. She almost sincerely believes that since her beloved is nearby, it means that they have only a bright future ahead of them. The “eternal bride” prefers not to think about his wife and children. And if one day this fact makes her change her behavior and thoughts, the young lady is amazed, frightened and often begins to behave like a complete hysteric. She showers reproaches on the man, calls his wife, complains about her deceit to others, sobs and appeals for sympathy.

4. mistress mother

   This woman is a real lover, next to which a man rests both in body and soul. Tired of solving endless everyday problems and tired of the demands of his wife, he finds peace in the house of his mistress-mother. No one climbs into his soul, no one forces him to earn money, take out the garbage, nail a nail ... Wrapped in care and affection, he seems to dissolve in the arms of his mistress, feeling completely safe.

   The rules of the mistress-mother are based on the principle of "do no harm." She will not harass with questions about a divorce, she will not ask about where he was worn for so long, she will not call her wife and will not reproach her for anything. Hearty and delicious food, bed, give unforgettable sex ... It would seem a complete idyll, get divorced, settle here forever! After all, at home - a grumpy wife in a washed-out bathrobe, serving store dumplings on the table, and children requiring regular attention. So no, no! He returns to his wife and children to wear out his nerves in order, and then again comes here to come to his senses. Why?! Yes, everything is very simple. After all, men understand that all this calm comfort can turn out to be a carefully built trap. And, if they finally fall into the tenacious paws of a mistress-mother, who knows what her care and attention will turn into then ... Perhaps the new family life will turn out to be much worse than the previous one. So why take the risk and get a divorce, if it's so good?

These are the most common types of women who, without much moral torment, associate with married men. There are still women who are dissatisfied with family life, women who only need sex, women who are hungry for money, and so on ... But we are not talking about them now. We are talking about those who, one way or another, are pushed into romance with married women by nothing more than a desire for love. All of them, deep down, cherish the hope of becoming the wife of their chosen one, and very often this desire does not come true.

The psychological background of such connections, as a rule, is different. Such a complex object of desire is chosen by a woman, because subconsciously she strives to overcome obstacles. Overcoming is accompanied by internal tension, tension is removed by meeting with a loved one and appears in separation from them, then it is removed again, again pumped up, and so on. And often, in this case, the main role is played not even by the attitude of a man to his mistress, but by the very fact that this relationship is forbidden.

However, among the mistresses there are also women who have managed to seriously fall in love with a married man and very much hope that someday he will belong entirely to her alone. In the event that she belongs to the category of masochistic mistresses, dreams can come true only if the legal wife herself leaves her husband. Hysterical mistresses practically cannot count on a successful outcome of a relationship. What man in his right mind would agree that his life will turn into a living hell? Even if he gets divorced, he will try to find a safe harbor for himself, and will not rush headlong into the stormy sea! Do they marry lovers-eternal brides? Only if love for a man is one of life's priorities. Which, admittedly, is quite rare. But the mistress-mother has a good chance of becoming a legal wife if she can prove that her devotion and care are sincere.

Conclusion: in order for an affair with a married man to end in marriage, you need to make a lot of effort. What? Here are some time-tested tips for lovers.

How to behave with a married man to minimize suffering and increase the likelihood of marriage with him?

1. If we try to combine the devotion and undemandingness of the masochistic mistress, the emotionality of the hysterical mistress, the naive romanticism of the eternal bride mistress and the reliability of the mother mistress, the chances of marriage with a married man will increase. This cocktail has a truly bewitching effect.
2. If we do not try to replace a man with a wife, his interest will grow and, in the end, can turn into a very strong feeling. This means that we do not wash, cook or clean with him. A man comes to his mistress's house to take a break from domestic problems. And he should be met by a beautiful loving woman, able to give moments of happiness.
3. If we don’t start throwing tantrums when a loved one suddenly marked the meeting because it was necessary to urgently resolve some family issues, we knew what we were doing. Therefore endurance, endurance and once again endurance! She will be an excellent assistant in building the foundation on which a serious relationship is based.
4. If we do not allow whining in the event that the ringed friend cannot appear for an anniversary, birthday, some kind of celebration, or hang around on the weekend. If he spends all weekends and holidays with his family, that's fine. The fact that the family (so far) has much more rights to a loved one is an indisputable fact, and one must come to terms with it.
5. If we do not get used to a man, considering him the only one in our lives. He will go to his wife. And if we admit the idea that this particular person is destiny, and cultivate it, as a result, the habit will make parting very difficult, and separation will burden the pangs of jealousy. We do not forget about ourselves, suffering alone, when there is no loved one. We find an interesting activity, meet friends and girlfriends, have fun in some companies and in no case do we torment the phone, calling it for no reason.

All these tips for mistresses, of course, do not guarantee that a man will divorce. But, in any case, he will not be deterred by the excessive obsession, hysteria and exactingness of a woman, meeting with whom should be a holiday. The most basic advice for single women is not to fall in love with married men! It is possible that they sincerely love their spouses, only feelings have dulled over time and no longer douse with the same heat. Often a married man does not realize this. But then, when the divorce becomes real, he suddenly feels unbearable mental pain, understands that his wife is more expensive, and chooses her. And the mistress, tormented by hopelessness and longing, again remains completely alone.

Be that as it may, the fate of a mistress is an unenviable fate. Even if as a result she turned into a wife, you can’t get away from the man’s past. It happens, of course, that it remains in the past and is forgotten over time. However, this is quite rare. Usually the connection with the former family does not stop, especially if there are children left in it. The woman who caused the divorce needs to be prepared for the fact that her beloved will spend time with them, call up, help. And to the fact that the former wife will not leave him alone. She will ask for help, be interested in the affairs of the ex-husband, sarcastic about his new family, and so on. And if the lady is also unprincipled, she will start pouring dirt at all corners. I must say that many will sympathize with her. And you have to be patient, wise, understanding. Is there enough strength for this?

So maybe it's better to find someone who is free and create your own world with him, devoid of outside interference? After all, no matter what the statistics say, there are enough worthy bachelors around. You just need to look at them and open your heart. Then everything will happen by itself. If you get rid of the thought that it is impossible to find your man now (they say that all normal people are busy and indeed they are very rare), he will certainly be found. Albeit with some shortcomings, but a good husband needs to be sculpted. It doesn't fall from the sky. After all, the family lover before his marriage was different. It is likely that if the wife had not tried, we would not have paid attention to him, who knows ... Yes, the heart chooses itself. If he is allowed. And if you impose a taboo on family men for yourself, the heart will obey. And it will reach out only to those who are intended only for us.

Send

cool

A married man is an object, it would seem, lost for the female. There is a stamp in the passport, a ring on the right hand, and that's it! Well, at least that's how it should ideally be. But in reality it's not like that. Today, married people arouse no less interest in the weak half of humanity than bachelors. And they themselves, with rare exceptions, are not at all averse to having a romance on the side. Such romances are found all the time, and society is even discussing them especially. The man in this case is usually quite satisfied with the status quo. Unless, of course, the legitimate wife does not suspect about the adventures of the faithful on the side, and the behavior of the mistress meets all his expectations. In this case, the relationship with her can last for years. But what is a young lady to do in such a situation, who seems to be unmarried, and at the same time does not belong to herself? How to behave with a married man if he fools his head with promises without taking any decisive steps?

Features of relations with a married man

They say that men, they say, even being happily ringed, are always not averse to playing intimate love with some attractive lady. But, to be honest, these days, many ladies themselves are not against relationships with married men. Previously, such connections were considered too immoral, and a woman who has a family lover instantly fell into the ranks of persons of easy virtue. Let him be her only one. And now, in some cases, such lovers are even an element of prestige. However, all arguments about the moral aspect of such relationships are actually empty chatter. May the moralists forgive us, but the fact remains that a man with a stamp in his passport does not cease to be a man. This means that other women may well like him. And they to him too. And when sympathies coincide, few people think about morality. The two throw themselves into each other's arms, not really bothering with the consequences of their act.

Sometimes such a relationship is short-lived, leaving behind only pleasant or annoying memories. And sometimes it drags on, turning almost into a kind of family relationship. That is, a kind of surrogate for family relations, where a man plays the role of an incoming husband. And the woman is the role of a temporary wife. And what happens? But it turns out that the “coming husband” is most often satisfied with this state of affairs. But a “temporary wife” is usually not. And let her brag, assuring that nothing else, they say, is needed from her lover, except for sex, money, attention, and so on. Nonsense. In the depths of her soul, a woman still dreams that he belonged only to her. Except when a young girl is kept by some rich, nasty bastard. But that is another topic.

So, what do we have in a relationship with a married man? And we have nothing but endless expectations, short-term secret meetings, weekends and holidays alone. No, well, sometimes a lover will drive in a nail, fix a faucet, move a cupboard. It seems like a man is in the house now! But it is sometimes. And so more and more you have to do it yourself or call someone. In general, unhappy circumstances. Or rather, not exactly funny. But, it’s sad there, not sad, but you’re still waiting for changes for the better, and you tell yourself that your loved one will certainly divorce and settle next to you forever. Well, it just can't! The wife is sick, the children need a father, and in general all of them will be lost without such a reliable male shoulder. He says so.

In fact, all this ranting about a helpless wife and children is a banal excuse for married men who don’t want to change anything in their lives. No, really, what else do they have to say? That the relationship with his wife is completely okay, that she regularly gets her way in bed, that the family hearth has long become familiar, and you don’t want to change your habits at all? Of course not! Otherwise, you will run into a scandal with your mistress, and this is useless. There are plenty of conflicts both at home and at work. And here you need to rest.

In a word, a relationship with a married man is not honey. A woman usually hopes for their good prospects, and if nothing changes for a long time, she starts to rush about. She just doesn't know what to do. Break off a relationship with a lover? It's not that easy. Tell your wife everything? It's kind of ugly. Let it be as it is? But life goes on, it gets old ... How to be? How to behave so that he finally takes a decisive step?

Indeed, what is the best way to behave in this case?

How to behave better with a married man

Frankly, no matter what we think to ourselves and no matter how we romanticize our relationship with married men, they need sex from their mistresses first of all. Well, who, having a wife, will voluntarily look for additional troubles on his head about arranging the life of another woman, or will he willingly undertake to solve her problems, not hoping for intimacy? Unless a complete altruist or an overly noble person, and there are only a few such people in the whole world. So let's really look at things. Of course, a man can be in love, but at the same time he still needs cool sex. Otherwise, falling in love will quickly pass, and the married man will forget about our existence.

Therefore, we leave aside the phrase: “I don’t want today” and we always meet our lover fully armed, burning with desire (or pretending to be burning). "Totally armed" means to look sexy, well-groomed and spectacular. Old comfortable jeans, faded bathrobes, sloppy hair, no makeup and other attributes of inner freedom - this is later when the man leaves. He will see enough of the same at home. We must contrive every meeting, even if it happened suddenly, to be stunning. Moreover, it is desirable that the stunningness changed its elements, otherwise it will get used and stop paying attention. That is, we change the hairstyle, clothes, make-up method, and so on. You should always be different and amazing. How? We fantasize, we fantasize! Just be careful not to scare the man with too aggressively lustful appearance. Shish will appear later!

Of course, it is not easy to tie a person to oneself with one crazy sex. Nowadays, there are more than enough available women who are masters of intimate art. Choose - I do not want. Satisfied with one, went to another. No, of course, there are men who prefer to deal with a permanent partner. But still, there is too little sexual attraction to be sure that the lover will not go anywhere. Talk about the fact that the husband left the family just because the other one was cooler in bed is nonsense. Unless he has no children and a completely useless wife. Well, in this case, divorce is not a problem. If the situation is different, because of the cool sex, a man will not go crazy. You can get sex a couple of times a week, and devote the rest of the time to your spouse and children.

So, you need to give your lover something else. What? First of all, it is understanding. No, not the understanding in which we sigh sympathetically when he complains about a grumpy, demanding spouse and a fool boss. Let it be spoken, it is useful, but you should not turn into a vest. Otherwise, instead of a beloved woman, he will one day see a mother in us. To understand a man means to share his interests at least in part. Then there will be common topics for conversation and some common goals. Is he into diving? Let's say that I would very much like to go down under the water with scuba gear at least once. Likes to drive? Ask them to teach you how to drive cars. Loves taking pictures? Let us inform you that a collection of unique photographs is our long-standing dream. All this should be said with indescribable delight. Say, finally I found a like-minded person and a person who is able to teach what I have long dreamed of!

These things should not be ignored. If we seriously want to lure a lover, it is necessary to find spiritual points of contact. Firstly, it will provide an opportunity to create not only a partnership, but also a commonwealth. Secondly, it will allow you to communicate with him as often as possible, go somewhere together, go somewhere, discuss something. Relationships that are built primarily on the basis of sex have little chance of developing. Sooner or later they will become insipid and fade. People also need to have joint business. Then the connection becomes not only more reliable, but also more interesting.

At the same time, sharing the interests of a lover, it is advisable to adhere to certain boundaries of communication. If, doing this or that business, spend too much time with him, the man will calm down and let everything take its course. Why should he stress? Both the spouse and the mistress are nearby and will not go anywhere. This cannot be allowed. Otherwise, we will remain the second wife in a small harem until the end of time. You must not forget about your own interests, regularly go somewhere, leave, disappear, without devoting your lover to the details and not allowing him to control himself. We must have a personal space where a man is not yet allowed to enter! Let him not think that we belong to him entirely. Does he go to his wife? Leaves. This means that the mistress has the right to walk wherever she pleases. And with whomever you want, by the way.

No, if there are intentions to build a reliable relationship with a married man, you should not start serious romances with others. Unless one of these "others" will cause serious feelings. Well, then the problem of relations with a married man will disappear. And when there are no feelings, it’s better to just flirt a little in order to have fun and get distracted. Double benefit. And the nerves will calm down, and the lover will be alarmed. Our men really do not like competitors in the sexual matter. So he will definitely not remain indifferent to the fact that his young lady has fans. And think about how easy it is to lose her.

Well, here are perhaps the main tips on how to properly behave with a married friend. Now let's see what is undesirable for a woman to do in this case.

How not to behave with a married lover

It seems that what we talked about above is not at all something too abstruse. Everything is obvious and does not require deep reflection. However, most women who have contacted married men, for some reason, behave differently. The result of such erroneous behavior is usually conflicts, suffering, separation and other troubles. The reason for this is the actions that a lady cannot do in such a relationship. What are these actions?

1. You can not demand from a man that he divorced, and constantly interfere in his family relationships. It is better not to touch on the topic of these relations at all. If he himself begins to tell something about his wife, it would be more correct to listen silently, without expressing his opinion;
2. You can not openly make efforts to advertise your connection, forcing a lover to appear together in society. If he wants the connection to remain a secret, then so be it. The tongue is on the lock, otherwise a big scandal may happen, the consequences of which will be disastrous;
3. You can’t be too annoying, call your lover if he doesn’t ask for it, and constantly try to meet him somewhere. It is better to let him call himself when he can, and make appointments himself too;
4. You can not beg for gifts and pull money out of a man. If he sees fit, he will make a gift and give money. There is no need to openly ask for this - he will decide that he is being used and stop trusting;
5. You can’t blame a man for not showing up for a long time, and throw tantrums at him. They go to mistresses not for another conflict. And if this happens again, they are abandoned;
6. You can not go into a relationship with your head, forgetting about yourself. We must always remember that he is not free, which means that he cannot yet become the meaning of life;
7. You can’t try to bind a man to yourself with constant requests for help in some way, inquiries about where he was and what he did, and so on. This is an attack on his freedom, which the wife certainly practices forever;
8. It is impossible to repeat all the time about your great love and that life without a lover is impossible. This will not increase his determination to change something for the better.

Of course, everything we talked about does not guarantee a happy future with a married man. To our great regret, the stronger sex treats connections on the side rather lightly. While the behavior of the mistress suits, they willingly meet with her, sleep, communicate. And if it ceases to suit, they disappear, leaving a farewell: “You knew that I have a family, what claims?”. No, not everything is so terrible, of course. It happens that they marry mistresses. But who can know if this will happen? So isn't it better not to make your happiness dependent on a married man? Even if it turned out that he became loved, let everything go on as usual. And we will try to treat it as calmly as possible. Time will put everything in its place.

Send

cool

Who should not go in love.

A woman who is not able to be the second in the life of a married man will never become a happy mistress. If you cannot let his wife go ahead - do not enter into a relationship with a married man.

Jealousy for your wife will poison all your pleasure and eventually ruin the relationship, and sometimes the lover's family at the same time.

It is women who are not suitable for mistresses who become the source of insoluble problems in unfree relationships, it is they who pull the man over and dream of taking him away from his wife and marrying him. And this poisons the relationship with the poison of jealousy, strife, suspicion, brings dissatisfaction, conflicts, quarrels, claims into them - all that a married man, in essence, fled from trying to hide in a "left" connection.

Attitude towards the lover's wife.

Don't compete with your lover's wife, give her first place by default. If you cannot do this, then married lovers are not for you - apart from the pain of disappointment and wasted time, you will not get anything from a relationship with a lover.

If your lover is silent about his wife, then you are lucky, this is the best option for building a strong and long-term relationship with him. It remains only to join this his silence.

If in some of his stories about family events, travels, incidents and the like slips a mention of his wife - this is normal, do not focus on this and do not raise the topic of his wife with your questions and curiosity.

If your married lover seeks to pour out any little conflict with his wife on your head, then stop such conversations "on the vine", otherwise you will very soon turn from a lover into a free personal psychotherapist, with the only difference that you do not have to pay, but you can fuck.

If you begin to support a married lover in his desire to talk about his wife, then all your meetings with him will turn into listening to his complaints accompanied by your sympathy and his wife will invisibly stand between you.

Lover's sex with his wife.

Jealousy of a lover's wife is a dangerous trap that you should never fall into. A wife, this is a given that must be reckoned with, she was before you, she is with you and she will remain with this man after your relationship with him ends. And they inevitably end someday.

Don't let your lover lie to you about not having sex with his wife. Of course there is sex. Marriage sex is carried out "by default" in the usual daily rhythm and is not an indicator of either good or bad relationships.

The lack of sex with his wife does not play into the hands of his mistress, but on the contrary, it is a threat to the strength of relations with a married lover, as it speaks of an unstable situation in his family. Very often, when a man’s family balance collapses, his relationship with his mistress also collapses, which are always tied to his current family situation and nothing else.

The best option is when a married lover and you have excellent, romantic, gentle, passionate sex, and a normal sex life with your wife. This is the best option for building a stable, long-term relationship with a married man.

In general, if you bother with the topic of his sex with his wife, then you have no place in mistresses.

The lover's wife is pregnant.

If a man is silent about his wife, children and family, you may never know that his wife is pregnant. And this is the ideal option. This means that for your lover, the relationship with you is clearly separated from his family. He does not bring to you any problems or joys of his family life and does not take away from you to the family the problems and joys of relations with you.
But this rarely happens.

If your lover tells you about his wife's pregnancy, then just congratulate him on the expected addition to the family. And that's all.

This event does not concern you, it occurs in that part of your lover's life, which is fenced off from you by an invisible, but indestructible and impenetrable border. In any case, that's how it should be.

The man is married, he has children, his wife is safely pregnant, he is expecting a replenishment of the family, he has a mistress who does not allow sexual tension to accumulate despite the temporary departure of his wife from "big sex". For him it remains only to rejoice!

Married lovers report their wife’s pregnancy because they want to be honest with their mistress, because you can’t hide the sewing in a bag (if he is used to telling his mistress about family affairs), because then they will still brag about the newborn baby, because the wife's pregnancy may change the already established schedule of meetings with his mistress.

The reasons do not concern you, only the consequences of this fact concern you. Ask your lover if your meetings will become less frequent now, if your wife’s pregnancy brings any changes to your relationship and what, if so.

Most often, the wife's pregnancy, if it affects something, is to increase the sexual activity of her lover.

Children of a married lover.

If your lover does not say anything about his children, then this is the best option - you just have to make sure that you do not accidentally bring up this topic yourself. Talking about children inevitably directs a man's thoughts towards the family, and this is not at all what you need when meeting with a lover.

If your lover loves his children very much and is proud of them, shows you their photographs, talks a lot about their achievements, then he wants you to share his paternal admiration too.

It is very good that your lover is a loving father, support him, praise his children, but do not allow such conversations to occur often, let alone become a system. These are his children, not yours, his family, not yours. For you, he is a married lover and you meet him for sex, pleasure and perhaps the most complete relationship.

Sometimes you can give gifts to his children (for example, for a birthday), passing them through a lover so that he presents them to children on his own behalf. You can help your lover to choose gifts for children, but only if he himself asks for it.

If your lover wants to introduce you to his children - never agree to it! A man, by virtue of his natural simplicity, sincerely believes that since he loves this woman, then his children will love her the same way.

In fact, the children experience a strong shock from meeting their father's mistress, they feel sorry for their mother, the children suffer severe psychological trauma, sometimes with serious long-term consequences, and the connection itself from this moment ceases to be a secret for the wife.

It is not worth introducing your children, if you have them, to your lover. This side of your life is best kept forever closed from your children. And there are no exceptions to this rule. Lovers come and go, but children stay with you forever.

Don't get lost in your lover.

Pablo Picasso. Sleeping man and sitting woman.

Never dissolve in your beloved married man and do not live only for him. Even if a lover is a very important part of life for you, it is only a part, not the whole life.

Continue to live the way you lived before meeting him, remain free in your hobbies and activities, do not give up anything that is useful, interesting or gives you pleasure.

And then you will never have a problem with what to do with yourself. In between meetings with your beloved man, you will not suffer and think about him every minute, but live an interesting and fulfilling life in which there is a place not only for your love, but also for many other things that are important to you.

Don't want to be your lover's wife.

If you want to be a happy lover - do not want to become the wife of your beloved, do not pull him from the family to you, be content with the role of a lover and remain a lover as long as a mutual feeling of love remains between you.

A happy lover in a relationship with a married man lives exclusively with love and therefore decisively cuts off the connection as soon as love begins to fade and leave.

Therefore, for a married man, a relationship with a happy mistress is a true love relationship in which there is absolutely no family component and the problems, duties and responsibilities associated with it - all this is enough for him at home. And with a mistress, he is only required to love and continuously reinforce his love with deeds and words.

Restrictions in relations with a married man.

Communication with a married man has its own limitations, which must be strictly observed. For example, you can’t appear together in places where you can be recognized, meeting in a circle of mutual acquaintances, you need to hide your feelings, you can’t call your lover at certain hours, leave traces of violent passion on his body, give him gifts that will be difficult to “legalize” in front of his wife like this Further. The list of "don'ts" is long enough.

This does not mean that the lover does not appreciate you, does not love you, does not value you or is ashamed of you. These are just the rules of relations with a married man and they should be treated in much the same way as the rules of the road, non-observance of which will inevitably lead to an accident, although sometimes the rules themselves seem terribly inconvenient.

If all this strains you, angers and annoys you, then unfree love is not for you.

Sometimes a married man who is in love tends to neglect caution and then you will have to think for two so as not to "light up" your relationship in front of his wife.

This can happen in two cases - on emotions during a period of strong love passion and through negligence, when the relationship is established and becomes so familiar that a man begins to perceive his mistress as part of his family.

Remember that as long as the wife does not know about you, only you alone manage your relationship with your lover, but as soon as the wife intervenes, everything will immediately go awry.

Manage relationships.

The relationship of a free woman and a married man, being left to chance, will inevitably lead to problems, conflicts, quarrels and parting.

To make your love for a married man happy - leave nothing to chance, always carefully observe your lover's attitude towards you and your attitude towards him.

Do not disregard any fact of non-obligation or neglect in relation to yourself on the part of the lover and she clearly fulfills all her promises.

Let the feeling that you are no longer the central object of care and love from a man serve as an alarm signal that something is not right in the relationship.

In love with a married man, be a self-sufficient woman. Do not allow yourself to be crushed by the conveniences of a man just because you love him, let your own conveniences and comfort mean no less to you than the comfort of your loved one. Let him treat you like an equal partner and beloved woman, and not like a "call girl".

Sex with a married lover.

Sex with a lover should completely satisfy you, a lover is exactly the man who can and must fulfill all your secret fantasies, and you, in turn, can give him the realization of his innermost desires, even those that he is silent about.

If lovers do not reveal themselves in sex completely and without a trace, then these are bad lovers and their relationship is unlikely to last long. And for non-free relationships, full sexual compatibility is generally the foundation of the foundations, without which everything else makes little sense.

Conversations after sex with a married lover, dreams or even plans for a future life have no real basis, and no matter what understanding and "spiritual unity" you feel at the same time - all these "feelings" do not mean anything at all and are easy forgotten by a man. A man is simply not inclined to attach importance to them.

A married lover actually does not feel such a surge of feelings and enthusiasm after the end of sexual intercourse, as his mistress does.

If sex is the only thing that connects you and your lover, then such a relationship will not make you happy and soon there will be a conflict from dissatisfaction with the completeness of the relationship (“he only comes to fuck me, he only needs sex from me!”).

A married lover usually does not accept such claims, he has become intimate with a woman for sex, he gives and receives sex, so what's the matter?

Men are not masters at building relationships, and if you want a full-fledged, lasting and lasting relationship with your lover, then you will have to work on it yourself.

Shared hobbies.

Be sure to try to share his hobbies with your lover - go to the gym or swimming pool with him, go hiking or fishing, go cycling or collecting stamps - depending on what your man is interested in.

Try to make him also share, if not all, then at least some of your hobbies. If your hobbies are too feminine (embroidery, cooking, sewing, etc.), then he can participate in them as a spectator or critic, but it is better that among your hobbies there is at least one that a man could share with you - photography, running jogging, skiing or surfing, whatever you can do together.

Joint hobbies of lovers not only give them both a lot of pleasure, but also bring lovers together on a different basis than sex, and this is important, it gives the relationship a little more completeness and takes them beyond the narrow framework of the bed.

If your married lover appreciates you not only as a sex partner, but also as a friend who shares his hobbies with him, then he will appreciate you not only by sexual criteria, but also by human qualities.

Joint hobbies will allow you to reveal to your beloved man such qualities of yours, the existence of which he did not suspect. The more multifaceted your points of contact with your lover, the better for your relationship with him.

Create and maintain in your lover the belief that you are not like everyone else, a special and unique woman in his life. And men value such women and they do not rush.

The easiest way to achieve this is to really be or become special in the eyes of your lover. Not only the lover will benefit from this, but you yourself, and your love and the quality of your relationship.

Money.

The conventional wisdom that the more money a man spends on his mistress, the more he appreciates her, is wrong. If a man fully supports a woman, he has a sincere conviction that he bought her, she is his thing. A thing is easy to change when it gets bored or deteriorates.

In a long-term happy relationship, participation in "money" matters should be mutual. Even if your financial capabilities are much lower than those of your lover, you still need to try to take part in some kind of joint spending: a hotel, dinner in a cafe, mutual gifts or theater tickets.

Gifts must be mutual. It can also be cute trinkets that have only moral value and gifts, albeit small, but useful .. A man is just as pleased to receive these material signs of attention, care and love as you yourself.

You must categorically refuse offers like "let's get a loan in your name" - this not only does not strengthen relations, but, on the contrary, destroys them. Generally speaking, this is a clear indicator that the mistress is stupidly used for money.

Joint friends.

If a man introduced you to his friends, it does not mean anything. Men often brag to each other about their mistresses and even arrange events (saunas, fishing, country picnics) where everyone is present with their mistresses.
Participation in such "festivals" does not give you anything.

Another thing is if you get the opportunity to communicate regularly with one of his friends, for example, on the basis of common hobbies, then you can try to make his friends become your friends too. The respectful attitude of his friends towards you will show your lover that not only he himself, but also other men find you an interesting and worthy woman.

But do not overdo it and do not bring the matter to jealousy on the part of the lover. Don't flirt or flirt with his friends. Your lover must be confident in you and constantly feel your special attitude towards him.

Married lover and holidays.

From the very beginning of a relationship, from your first meeting with a married lover, accustom yourself to the idea that he will celebrate all the holidays with his family.

In a relationship with a married man, it is completely normal for a woman that she celebrates all the holidays without him. There is no bitterness, no disappointment, resentment, dislike - nothing negative and bad. It's just one of the rules of loving a married man, that's all.
If you can't put up with it - don't go to mistresses.

Meet the holidays as a free woman in active search. It is your lover who is burdened with wife, children and family responsibilities, and you are free and always open to new relationships. Remember this.

Meeting with a married lover.

Usually at the very beginning, when passions are still raging, meetings with a lover are frequent. But after, when passions subside and relations more or less stabilize, there is a tendency to reduce the number of meetings. This is fine.

Meetings with a married lover are measured in "times a week." Not a day, not a month, but a week. At the same time, Saturday and Sunday automatically fall out of the meeting schedule, unless your lover has some special circumstances that allow you to use these sacred family days to meet with you.

The best option is when the meetings take place according to a predetermined schedule, for example, every Tuesday and Thursday. To do this, both you and your lover need to reorganize their lives a little in order to separate and "book" time for meetings.

The worst option is more common - meetings are scheduled on the fly, most often when the lover's desire to be with you coincides with his free time. At the same time, according to his ideas, you are only busy with sitting and waiting for his call. (And if this is true, then you drowned up to your ears depending on your lover and you need to be saved!).

Insist on regular meetings on a schedule and never adjust to your lover's "flying" desires if it goes against your plans. Dropping everything and running to the meeting place just because your busy lover has an extra half hour is a sure way to drop your self-esteem, and there it’s not far from depression ..

Your relationship with someone else's husband should be easy, not burdensome and pleasant. They should have a lot of fun and few problems.

Cancellation of meetings.

Cancellation of meetings is a normal phenomenon in relations with a married man, and the higher his official and social status, the more normal (but not more pleasant) it is.

However, the frequent cancellation of meetings indicates a drop in the lover's interest in you, and this is without options, and no circumstances other than fatal ones are an excuse for this. Who wants - finds opportunities, who does not want - excuses. If he does not have time for you, then he is simply not suitable for you as a lover.

The worst option is to cancel the meeting literally on the eve of the meeting itself, the best option is a warning about the impossibility of meeting a day or two before the meeting with a mandatory explanation of why.

If the lover simply did not come to the meeting without any warning, then this is not an option at all, but a reason to part with him. You just need to make sure first
that he is alive and well, and not lying in a deep coma in some hospital. This is the only excuse that can be accepted in this case.

Parting with a married lover.

No matter how long the relationship with a married lover lasts, they will inevitably end someday. Because relationships with a married man, unlike marriage, are never forever.

You need to part with your lover when your love has declined, when the relationship has ceased to satisfy you, when there are too many problems in the relationship, when mutual claims arise, when the lover cancels meetings and his interest in you falls.

A lover may have exactly the same reasons to end a relationship with you, plus the famous "wife began to guess" or "wife found out about everything." He may well get ahead of you and leave you first without any warning.

It will be better for you to put an end to it yourself than to wait for the moment when your lover does it and you have to unexpectedly part with him being unprepared for such a turn of events.

The negative emotions that you will experience for some time when parting with your lover have nothing to do with "suffering" and should not be afraid of them. This is just a normal reaction of your psyche to a sudden change in the schedule of your life. And no more.

A guarantee of happy love with a married lover.

The guarantee of a happy relationship with a married lover is the willingness to part with him if this relationship no longer suits you. And there is no other guarantee and cannot be.

Do not adapt to your lover, do not educate him, do not treat him with understanding, but simply leave him at the very moment when you realize that such an attitude that he offers you does not suit you, and a lover cannot give another attitude.

Let his wife understand him, let her educate him, pick up the "keys" to his bad character, "get used" to his shortcomings and in every possible way set up the tuning fork of family relations through endless compromises and concessions - this is her concern and her task, and you are a mistress!

You use only what is ready, only what is best in a man, and if he stops giving you this best, you resolutely refuse him without much thought.

And if you can’t do that, if you grow into someone else’s husband with all the fibers of your soul so that you can’t imagine life without him, then you have nothing to do in mistresses.

Note #1.

This is not all, but only the basic rules of a love relationship with a married man. This topic is very broad and cannot be covered in one article. But I hope that the main core of such relationships has become clear to the thoughtful reader, and this is the most important thing - to understand the deep essence of non-free relationships, and there can be an infinite number of individual behaviors.

Note #2.

Bonded relationships are inherently limited, so don't expect too much from them. These relationships lead nowhere, they have no future. All they can give is the current moment. And if the current moment no longer suits you, the relationship needs to be cut off. And nothing else.

And it's best not to enter into a relationship with a married man at all.

: the benefits of a relationship

For young and poor girls, a relationship with a wealthy married man can bring tangible benefits. With the help of a rich and generous lover, you can improve your well-being. However, the main thing here is not to sell too cheap and agree only to real help. True, in this case it is worth realistically assessing your capabilities. A girl who dreams of becoming the mistress of a rich married man must be very attractive, few people need an ugly kept woman.

Being the mistress of a married man is beneficial. For freedom-loving women, such a connection means independence and the absence of any obligations. You can leave your lover at any time.

Relations with a married man do not interfere with looking for a husband in parallel. You don’t need to rush at the first person you meet, but thoroughly choose your future life partner, with whom you can later feel calm and as comfortable as possible.

For married women, relationships on the side give sensations that, alas, have become inaccessible in family life. For such women, becoming the mistress of a married man means asserting herself, proving to herself that her female attractiveness is still alive.

In general, with the right approach, relationships with a married man can bring a lot of joy. It is possible to build this relationship in such a way that it will be beneficial for both parties.

Mistress of a married man: cons and pitfalls

If everything is so good, then why is the overwhelming number of mistresses of married men so unhappy? It turns out that in such a relationship there are still enough disadvantages that burden partners.

A woman eventually begins to understand that her lover still belongs to another. Sooner or later, situations will arise in a relationship when a married man will be forced to make a choice in favor of his wife. For example, lovers gathered for a concert, and then his wife suddenly calls, she urgently needed something. And now, a married man is already rushing home, he has to forget about the planned trip to the concert. The mistress of a married man is left all alone. Loneliness on holidays is the lot of a woman who has connected her fate with a married man.

Sooner or later, the wife will still find out about her mistress. It all depends on the temperament of the wife. The consequences for a mistress can be very different, up to a scandal with assault.

The mistress of a married man is forced to always remain on the sidelines. She will never fully possess her man. Short meetings, vacations and holidays spent alone, constant hopes that one day her beloved will leave his family - all this makes the life of a married man's mistress sad, humiliating and unpromising.

So what are the benefits of this position?

A woman owes nothing to anyone. Agree, at least once in your life you dreamed of an easy relationship in which no one puts pressure on you. You don't have to devote all your free time to your man. If you wish, you can have relationships with several young people. And you don't have to feel guilty about a permanent partner (of course, if you don't have a spouse).

Great relationship experience. Communication with the opposite sex allows us to better learn to understand people. Any relationship is a valuable experience that helps us work on our own mistakes.

Good time. Contrary to popular belief, a married lover can give you not only enchanting sex, but also exciting communication. Many couples enjoy visiting theaters, exhibitions, and make small trips. A new person in your life can help you find an incentive for self-development and self-improvement.

Distraction from life. Unfortunately, it is everyday life that causes cooling of feelings in many couples. On this basis, quarrels and misunderstandings often arise. With a married lover, you can forget about all these problems. Meeting with him is a celebration of romance.

Fresh emotions. How often in life there are not enough new feelings that make us take a different look at the world. The wise mistress of a married man enjoys secret dates, finding in this position some special zest and piquancy. If you are looking for just such sensations, then periodically you will have to change your lover.

Material support. By becoming the mistress of a wealthy man, you will be able to receive pleasant gifts from him that you could not afford before. There is nothing shameful in this: you give him positive emotions, and he indulges you with luxurious surprises.

Lover can provide material support

Why does a man need a mistress?

Speaking about the rules of conduct for the mistress of a married man, you should first understand why men decide to cheat on their spouses. What do the representatives of the stronger sex really want from girls? Here are the main causes of adultery:

A mature man wants to feel young and reckless again. To do this, he chooses young and pretty girls who are ready to give him their own time.

A man gets tired of constant relationships that are filled with scandals and quarrels. He is looking for an opportunity to pour out his soul and talk about his own problems. A man expects understanding and moral support from his mistress. This is not a wife who saws him almost every second.

Having lived for several years in marriage, a man realizes that he lacks fresh emotions. At home, he is met by the same woman, dressed in the same housecoat. He knows every inch of her body, thoroughly learned what brings her pleasure in bed. He memorizes the names of her favorite perfumes and TV shows. He simply lacks variety, not only in sex, but also in relationships.

Sometimes a man wants new emotions

Problems in bed. Intimate relationships in the family often gradually come to naught. Unfortunately, first of all, the spouses are to blame for this, who cease to monitor their own figure and appearance. There are also women who are practically indifferent to sex. So a man has to look for satisfaction on the side.

Revenge. Suspecting or convicting a spouse of treason, not every man decides to divorce. Some Husbands Just Have Mistresses Who Help Them improve self-esteem.

Thus, in a mistress, a man first of all looks for what he lacks in his own family. And these are exactly the things that once accompanied the beginning of a relationship with his current wife.

A man never decides to cheat in order to start a new family. From this follows the first rule of behavior of the mistress of a married man: never and under no circumstances should you wait for the continuation of the relationship. By allowing yourself to think that one day he will leave his wife and come to you, you doom yourself to suffering. Do you need it?

Do not try to tie a man to you with some gifts and cute surprises. Set aside ties, lighters, perfumes for a permanent partner with whom you will have a serious relationship. The best gift for a lover is you. In beautiful linen, neat outfit, with good styling and natural make-up. Don't be a caring mom.

Don't pry into your lover's personal life. Asking him about the family, you most likely will not hear any truth. Most often, men tell their mistresses that they live with their spouses, like neighbors, there is no intimate relationship between them, and indeed they sleep in different beds. Naive girls believe in this nonsense and ... invent feelings for themselves on the part of a man. At the same time, the hero-lover himself is having a great time with you and his wife.

A lover should have a private life

Realize that the spouse will be in the first place for a man. Let the feelings fade away, even if they really have problems with sex, but they are connected by long years of living together and, possibly, common children. In addition, according to numerous surveys, a small percentage of men are ready to sacrifice their usual comfortable living conditions for the sake of a new adventure. Having enjoyed your company, he will go home, where dinner prepared by his wife awaits him. And it's not worth making a tragedy out of this either.

Do not try to become his second wife. If it turns out that you really fell in love with a lover, do not seek to take him away from the family by ironing his shirts or pampering him with gourmet treats. In this situation, his interest in you will gradually fade away, because there will be no intrigue left.

Do not introduce a man to relatives. Most likely, the offer of such a meeting will simply repel the lover, who will decide that you have some kind of views on him. This rule does not apply to friends and acquaintances.

Are you expecting gifts and expensive surprises from your lover? In that case, from the very beginning you should behave like a real lady. When you visit a restaurant for the first time, you should not take your wallet out of your purse and try to pay for yourself. Also teach a man to come to visit you not empty-handed. At the very least, a bouquet of daisies must be present. Be for him a weak and desirable girl.

Do not devote a man to your personal life. You have every right to communicate with other males. Let him know that your relationship will last exactly as long as you want, not him.

Talk to him directly about what you don't like about your relationship. For example, while at your house, he switches the TV to a sports channel. Or he is constantly late for meetings for no good reason. Do not be silent and do not pretend to be a sufferer. A man should know that in front of him is a self-sufficient and self-confident girl. You don't have to play by his rules.

Be busy doing something. In addition to work, you should find an interesting hobby for yourself. Go to the gym, Chinese language classes, literature club, go to theaters, etc. A busy life schedule will not only make your life brighter, but also show your lover that he is not the center of the universe for you. Let the man independently adjust to the rhythm of your life and find time for dates.

You must always be a little busy with your own affairs.

A smart girl uses many ways to lure a man, and a wise woman does it in such a way that the man is sure that everything happens solely on his initiative. In no case should he decide that you are seeking him, and not he you.

Don't be hysterical. If a man once canceled a meeting or was unable to attend a holiday because of his wife, you should not make a scandal. Pretend that you simply did not notice this or considered what happened to be a trifle. Otherwise, very soon your relationship will simply come to naught.

Advice for married women who have a married lover

Relationships between not free people are the most convenient option for connections on the side, because in this situation, you both understand that you are not held by any obligations. However, in this situation, a woman has a serious problem: she needs to make every effort so that her husband does not find out about the side connection. To do this, you will need to follow these tips:

Never choose as a lover a man who knows your spouse. Often, the best friends of husbands become the object of sympathy for girls. But this option should be immediately abandoned. Sooner or later, the secret will be revealed.

What does a woman who has a lover look like? New emotions overwhelm her. She smiles and flies on the wings of passion. In the eyes of the girl it is noticeable that pleasant changes have taken place in her life. Many ladies begin to pay increased attention to their appearance. An attentive husband will immediately notice that something is wrong with you. Immediately descend from heaven to earth and stop doing combat makeup in the morning. Try to make sure that your face does not express anything superfluous.

Glitter in the eyes can give out the presence of a lover

1. A married lady who has taken a lover begins to come after work much later. Naturally, she informs her husband that she has a lot of things to do, papers that need to be drawn up, meetings, etc. Finding out the true reason for this behavior is quite simple. Use an alternative method.

Get yourself a girlfriend with whom you supposedly will attend various events in the city. It is even worth inviting a friend for a tea party at your home. 1-2 times a week you can justify your absence by meeting with her. If you wish, you can meet with your lover even on weekends. To do this, inform your husband in advance that you are going with Masha / Katya / Sveta to some fashion exhibition that obviously will not interest him. You can even invite your husband to this event. Obviously, he would rather watch football or go fishing with his friends.

A good lover will give you some gifts from time to time. If you have new jewelry or expensive dresses, come up with a believable story about the death of a wealthy distant relative of your mother or aunt. Remember: all labels from things must be thrown away immediately. If the husband suspects something is wrong, he can take a walk to where the goods were purchased. He can easily find out when the purchase was made and how it was paid.

What to do if a lover invites you on a short trip for a few days? Traveling is a smart option. It is desirable that the final destination is not known to your spouse. Naturally, this option is dangerous if your husband is well acquainted with your superiors or employees.

Any correspondence with a lover must be conducted on a work computer. Use your home laptop exclusively for other purposes. Otherwise, you run the risk of forgetting to leave the social network one day, and the entire dialogue will be successfully read by the jealous.

Try not to communicate with your lover on the phone at a time when the husband is at home. If there is an urgent need to call the object of passion, think that you urgently need to go to the nearest store for bread. Next time, go take out the trash or take your dog for a walk.

After a passionate evening with a lover, do not rush to go to the bathroom. An observant spouse may think that you are trying to quickly wash away the traces of a vicious relationship.

Do not forget that you need to fulfill your marital duty in bed. If you start constantly denying your husband intimacy, he will immediately understand what is happening. Try not to change intimate behavior and not demonstrate new skills to your spouse.

Do not allow your lover to leave traces of your sexual games on the body. Scratches, hickeys are direct evidence of your extramarital affair. Any arguments are powerless against such evidence.

A husband can find out about a lover by finding traces of love games on the body

Be in touch at any time. When away from home, never turn off your phone. Pick up the phone, even while in bed with your lover. Confusion can easily be explained by being in the gym, rushing to a meeting, missing the last bus, and so on. In this case, the risk of suspicion on the part of the spouse will be minimized.

Try to make sure that the lover does not have any evidence of your relationship. We are talking about joint photographs or even videos ... There are situations when a woman, having decided to leave her lover, is blackmailed by him. Protect yourself in advance, because you can never predict what might await you.

Pamper your spouse with delicious dinners, devote enough time for your children. Remember that a lover is a temporary phenomenon. And the family requires full attention from you.

Don't tell literally anyone about your lover. Even the best friend can be a rare bitch. Be prudent. You can only trust yourself with such serious secrets. Of course, in no case should you start a personal diary.

Never give in to the temptation to confess to your husband of infidelity. Even if he somehow finds out that there are rumors that you have a lover. Even if the lover decides to annoy you and calls his spouse (and this happens)! In the most unfortunate situation, you can pretend to be a victim and say that your lover slandered you because you refused to enter into an intimate relationship with him.

Do not carry condoms in your purse if you and your husband do not use this method of contraception. It is better to buy condoms just before a date.

Do not, under any circumstances, bring your lover to your home. Even if the spouse is on a long business trip, you may be noticed by “friendly” neighbors who will gladly tell your spouse about what is happening. The ideal option is dates on neutral territory.

How to take a lover out of the family?

Unfortunately, romantic women are not always able to maintain their composure. Many ladies fall hopelessly in love with married lovers. What to do in that situation if you have really strong feelings for this particular man? According to statistics, no more than 5-7 percent of unfaithful spouses go to mistresses. But there is always a chance. The main thing is to follow wise advice:

Remember that if a man has not left the family after a year of your relationship, he will never do this. Therefore, it is necessary to act much earlier.

Try to study your lover well. He will probably constantly tell you about himself, problems in relations with his wife. Learn his habits and personality traits.

Let him know that he can trust you. Be an attentive listener and interlocutor. Keep all his secrets and problems in strict confidence. Do not refuse the help and support he needs if you are able to do something for him.

Remember that a man will leave his wife only for the sake of a mistress who will be much better than her. Therefore, you need to make time for your appearance, go to the gym and always look as neat as possible.

Take care of intellectual enrichment. Men love women who can keep up a smart conversation on any life topic. At the same time, you should not try to show your superiority.

Try not to disturb the man with your own problems. He should not see your tears and tantrums. With you, he should constantly feel warmth and joy.

If the object of your passion is over 40 years old, you should exercise maximum caution. You need to determine what this man really wants. Accustomed to many years of marriage, he can only go to that mistress who can provide him with the most comfortable living conditions.

Learn different sexual techniques. You have to become a real master in this matter. Returning home, a man should feel that something is missing.

Try not to touch the financial issue. If you need to find out the income level of a loved one, do it indirectly.

You should give the impression of a simple and rather docile woman with whom he will not have constant conflicts. Of course, you should also have your own point of view.

• If a man has children, try to show a sincere interest in this issue. Surely he will be happy to talk about his kids. Even if a man has fallen out of love with his wife, he will never give up his children. Your inquiries will show your lover that, in the event of your reunion, you will gladly accept his daughter or son. And no problems like "The new wife does not allow to see the children from the first marriage" will not arise.

How to break up with a married lover?

If you realize that your relationship is hopeless, and over time you become more attached to a man, think about how to break this painful connection for you. First of all, you need to understand that your leaving is a conscious choice that will allow you to start a new life without the same pain. If you decide to break up, don't change your mind. Do not expect a married lover to change his mind and leave the family. Most likely, after a while he will simply find a new mistress. Remember that a girl's youth passes very quickly. If you cannot imagine your life without a full-fledged family, give up married lovers once and for all.

The first few weeks after breaking up with a married lover, try to spend in the company of people close to you. You may need to change your phone number (in case it rings). A good way out of the situation would be a short trip to another city or country. There you can unwind and relax mentally.

You should not withdraw into yourself and think that your ex-man is the best person in the world, and you will not find this anymore. Understand that your love would not torment you. If you are lonely, allow yourself to start a new romance with a free young man. Even if he does not become your husband, you are guaranteed to receive a charge of positive energy.

We hope that this article has helped you get rid of many of the problems that mistresses of married men face. In any case, you should start taking things a little easier. You are the creator of your own destiny!

To feel needed and desired is the main need of a woman. For this, she is ready to play any games with a man: to be caring and indifferent, in love and cold, passionate and tender. But how to behave with a lover so that he is afraid of losing you?

Do not rush to open the doors of the cafe yourself, do not book tables and do not book rooms - let him feel like a gallant gentleman. Source: Flickr (Jose_Hdez._Brito_Follow)

How to behave with a lover: 5 golden rules

• Say no to ownership

This is how nature works: girls are sentimental. Those who vehemently deny this and with all their might create the image of a fatal seductress are doubly sentimental. As a rule, one hot night of love is enough for a woman to mentally start trying on her lover's groom's suit. As a joke, for the sake of curiosity, perhaps without even realizing it. This is where the first stumbling block is hidden: a woman wants certainty, a man wants freedom.

It is impossible to resolve this conflict of interest, but it is possible to smooth it out, and a woman should do it. How to behave with a lover so that he is afraid of losing you? The correct answer is to respect his personal space and not be possessive. The only place where you can afford to command them a little is in bed. Outside of it, it is better to restrain such impulses.

• Excessive effort backfires

Relax. You don't have to go out of your way to present yourself from the best side. He already likes you and that's enough. Baking pies, ironing shirts and reminding him for the hundredth time of the benefits of a hearty breakfast is the holy duty of his mom. You are in the status of a mistress, but this is a completely different story. Your only job is to love yourself and let him do the same.

It is clear that the feeling of falling in love causes impulses in you to do something nice. But find another way than a three-course meal. Lovers, of course, also love to eat and your talents will be noted, but is anyone afraid of losing a cook?

• Man is the hunter, not the prey

How to behave with a lover, based on this rule? How does the game behave in the forest? He lives his own life and does not jump out from behind every bush with a plea "Catch me, finally!". With the expression on the face of the snow queen, one after another, it is not worth rejecting the proposals for a meeting. But let him know that your life doesn't revolve around him. Work, friends, hobbies, family - you don't have much free time. Set boundaries, and then he will want to break them.

Do not answer the call right away - you may be busy, do not agree to the time he suggested - there are already plans for this evening. Let it adapt to you - in the end, who needs more?

• The lady has the last word

It is generally accepted that a girl should fully share the interests of her young man. "Nonsense!" psychologists say. Common interests are a good foundation for a strong relationship, but only if they are truly shared. Did your lover invite you to drink beer and watch football? Agree, but only if you like beer and support the national team. Otherwise, don't be afraid to say no. Indulging a man in everything is a bad tactic.

• The strength of a woman is in her weakness

A common truth: a man loves a woman for how he feels around her. How to behave with a lover so that he is afraid of losing you? Psychology gives one more piece of advice: give the peacock the opportunity to spread his tail. Do not rush to open the doors of the cafe yourself, do not book tables and do not book rooms - let him feel like a gallant gentleman. Ask him for some small favor (the key word is small, to shelter your aunt from Urengoy - obviously not from that opera), and then do not forget to sincerely thank.

It is interesting! Scientists have found that people are imbued with greater sympathy not for those who have rendered them a service, but, on the contrary, for those whom they themselves have helped. The reason is in physiology: when we are thanked, the body produces hormones of joy (endorphins).

Behind the bedroom doors: how to drive your lover crazy?

Sex is the main weapon of mistresses. But, like any weapon, it is fraught with many dangers, so you need to handle it correctly. By the way, behind the bedroom doors is a conditional expression. According to opinion polls, the most popular meeting places for lovers are offices, hotels, apartments of close friends and car dealerships. Such a change of locations of the snake in itself eliminates boredom in the field of intimate communication. But in order to drive your lover crazy, this is not enough.

• speak

Even the most seemingly self-confident men are afraid to lose face and disappoint their lady. An unsatisfied woman is a lover's biggest nightmare, so don't let it come true. The banal phrase "It was amazing!" will certainly please him. Encouraged by your praise, next time he will try even harder.

To make your praises sincere, learn to voice your desires. Of course, it’s not worth giving out commands like a commander on a parade ground. Just gently guide your man in the right direction - in an excited state, he is very malleable. A woman who knows what she wants in bed and is not afraid to say it out loud will be a real find for her lover.

• Act spontaneously

Too much preparation and thinking about the details, as a rule, spoils everything. Avoid the staged scenes that are vividly described in cheap women's magazines. Silk underwear and cream are generally incompatible things. Sparkling sex is what makes it possible to enjoy your desire and intimacy.

It is interesting! How to surprise a lover? Dance a sensual dance - striptease. Just don't get hung up on what and how to do - this is not a choreography exam. Move according to your inner rhythm.

• Explore hotspots

If you think that a man has only one erogenous zone, you are deeply mistaken. The strong sex is no less sensitive than the weak one. To hit the bull's-eye, decide what type of worldview your lover belongs to. There are only 3 of them: auditory, visual and kinesthetic.

A pronounced auditory can drive you crazy just the sound of your voice. A gentle whisper of love - and it's yours. With visuals it is more difficult: you will have to take extra care of yourself and choose underwear. Pitch darkness is their enemy. Leave at least one subdued light source - the visual lover should see you and enjoy. But the most sensual type is kinesthetics. How to satisfy this type of lover? Learn different massage techniques and take care of oils.

But before you enthusiastically set about learning how to behave with a married lover, it would be better to think carefully: why do you need these very relationships?

Today we will try to figure out how to behave properly as a mistress. After all, many girls completely forgot about the rules of conduct in such cases. Here are some rules of conduct.

1. You should never love a married man. After all, he has a wife, so let her love him. Similarly, suffering and distress can be avoided.

2. A mistress needs to learn to enjoy every hour, every moment of meeting with her lover. You need to understand that a mistress in a man's life is a joy and a holiday, and a wife is a gray everyday life. You should not pay attention to what holidays much less than weekdays, because the holidays are the sweetest. Thus, you can drive away bad thoughts from yourself.

And especially to have a good time will help such a tool. Thanks to him, you will not have to waste a single minute of joint time, since such a product will literally not allow a man to think about extraneous things.

3. Engage in some activity. The more busy, the more a man will respect his mistress and in his eyes, you will become higher. And to his proposal to meet, answer what you need to look in the organizer, whether there is free time, which can coincide with his time. But instead, for some reason, some are trying to find out how to bewitch the guy they like without a photo at a distance.

4. Do not be upset if a man spends all public holidays with his family. It should not be the only light in your window. Holidays should be spent with friends, because they didn’t disappear when a lover appeared. After all, the holidays are always fun with friends. Well, if you still really want to be with your lover for the holidays, then it has come love and then these tips will not help. But nice words will help. that everyone loves to hear.

5. Be natural. You should not listen to the advice of various magazines about the constant readiness for his arrival, so that you always have makeup and hair, you should not listen to these tips. He has already seen you many times without makeup and naked from the shower. After all, he comes to you and it does not matter to him the presence or absence makeup. He's already seen you without makeup and it didn't scare him at all. So relax, but do not forget to follow your beauty. If you do not maintain beauty, he may leave you. Then you don't even have to think about how to part with a married man,

whom you love. After all, he will do everything himself.

6. Do not become a cook for him. If you want to please him and cook something, let it not become a habit. It is better to go to a cafe together and have a bite to eat there. Well, if you still decide to cook food for him, do something that he has never tried. He must understand that he can only eat so tasty with you.

7. You need to understand that you are just pampering for him and a means of satisfying his ambitions. If you dream that he put an engagement ring on your finger, read how to make a lover your husband.

I don’t know for which mistress it is written here, but anyway, sooner or later, the mistress begins to give whims and does not "to give" in general, and then comes the affect and other joys for men in the form. “so who am I to you?”, and who are you to me. And that's where the concert ends. So everyone should know their place, this is for girls for the future.!) In general, such articles should be removed from the air)

Probably, this is a personal matter for every girl - to live in marriage or remain an eternal lover. Although… there are no eternal lovers, their enemy is time.

I absolutely agree, such articles are useless. This is already a guide, as from "Pretty Woman", not to kiss on the lips. The fact that men especially married and especially long-married have a desire to party is not a secret. And such a “allowance”, with permission, only encourages this type of “walk”. And if you find yourself in such a situation as the wife of such a husband? If the wife is tired, then let her divorce, leaving her full support and forward to mistresses. And how to behave with him, I think the girls themselves will figure it out.

How often women are mistaken and believe that if you take a man away from the family, then you can build your happiness on someone else's grief. This happens extremely rarely or even does not happen. Mistresses should always remember that a man has gone to her, which means he will leave her for another .

I disagree with Daria. my father left his wife for my mother. They lived together for almost thirty years. In love and fidelity. That's it.

“I called myself a loader, climb into the back”, what else can I say ... became a mistress - be ready for this role with all not only joys, but also problems...

Many married men have an affair on the side. And women have a question: how to behave with such a lover so that the relationship is long-term and lasting? Is it possible to force a man to leave his wife?

How to keep attractive

No matter what a lover says, first of all he wants good sex. Therefore, you should not refuse him this, referring to fatigue or a headache. Only an ardent and passionate lover can hope for a long romance.

In addition, you should always look beautiful and change the image so as not to annoy a man. In no case should you meet a lover in a worn dressing gown, without makeup and a good haircut - he will see enough of this at home
.
But to create a strong relationship, beauty and sex are not enough.

The Secret to a Lasting Relationship

Relationships built solely on the basis of sex fade sooner or later. And even falling in love passes, and quickly enough. Reason gradually takes over feelings, and a married man returns to his soulmate or finds a new romance on the side, since there are a lot of affordable, beautiful and sexy women around. How to behave with a married lover so that the relationship becomes durable?

To do this, you need to understand the lover and share his interests. It is spiritual kinship that unites people most of all. If a man feels that he has found a like-minded woman in a woman, then he will not want to exchange her for another.

But understanding a man does not mean listening to endless complaints and agreeing with him in everything. Of course, it is important for a person to speak out sometimes; if a mistress can listen and help, it is valuable. Often men who are looking for an affair on the side do not receive exactly understanding and support from their wife. But for the development of relations, a common interest is needed. Therefore, it is useful to find out what a man is interested in and find a common hobby with his lover. This will allow you to spend more time together and share new things with each other. But the woman's interest must be sincere and genuine.
If the mistress shares the man's hobbies, understands and supports him, this may even force the lover to break up with his wife. However, you should not have high hopes about this: they can easily ruin everything.

Common Mistakes

It is not enough to know how to behave with a married lover, you also need to understand what not to do.

Many mistresses try to interfere in a man's personal life: they ask about his wife and children, or even ask him for a divorce. Under no circumstances should this be done. If a man himself talks about his family, it is better to stay neutral and not show excessive curiosity.

If the love affair is secret (and this is almost always the case), then a woman should keep this secret. Often this causes a lot of inconvenience: you can’t appear together in public, you can’t be the first to call or write to your lover. However, otherwise there may be a big scandal and, most likely, the mistress will be abandoned.

Another common mistake is constantly asking for help or money. This will make the man think that the mistress is trying to take advantage of him, and undermine her credibility. If a lover wants to give an expensive gift, he will make it himself, you can’t beg. Small household requests can be addressed, but occasionally; a man should not get the impression that his mistress is encroaching on his freedom.

Often, mistresses make scandals due to the fact that a man has not appeared for a long time or has not come to an appointment. You can't do this either. First, a married man does not manage his time independently and depends on the family. Especially if the relationship is secret, and the wife is jealous. Secondly, the lover has enough conflicts at home. Therefore, it is better not to make scandals with him at all. A man finds a mistress to have a good time, and not solve her problems and explain to her where he was, what he was doing and why he did not come earlier.

So, in order to maintain a romantic relationship with a married man, you need to follow a number of rules. But we must not forget about ourselves. It is important to remember that the partner is married and, most likely, will not want to end the marriage in order to start a family with a mistress. This means that a woman must continue to look for her love, which will become a legitimate soulmate.