Interesting Facts 

Individual conversations and consultations with parents. Consultation for teachers "Conversations and consultations with parents as forms of implementation of an individual approach to parents

List of parents invited to consultations. Information about them.

1 shift

Zakharova M.A. (single mother)

Emanakova S.V. (the large family)

2 shift:

Myrycheva O.A. (single mother, poor)

Tabakov A.N. (single-parent family, mother is deprived of parental rights)

Consultation topics. The course of the conversation with the parents, the result.

During the conversations on the problems of the child, the parents were informed about the problems of their children, and the ways out of the problem situations were suggested. Were studied social information about the parents, the status of the family. The topics of the consultations were - "Manifestation of aggression by a child", "Problems of interpersonal communication". For each problem, parents were invited to the meeting, whose children have the above problems.

The level of aggressiveness of children varies depending on the situation to a greater or lesser extent, but sometimes aggressiveness takes on stable forms. There are many reasons for this behavior: the child's position in the team, the attitude of peers towards him, the relationship with the teacher, etc.

The persistent aggressiveness of some children is manifested in the fact that they, differently than others, sometimes understand the behavior of others, interpreting it as hostile.

Boys are more prone to aggression. She is part of the male stereotype, cultivated in the family and the media.

A very common cause of child aggression is the family situation.

Aggressive behavior of family members in everyday life situations: shouting, swearing, humiliation of each other, mutual reproaches and insults. Psychologists believe that a child shows aggressiveness in everyday life several times more often where he saw the aggression of adults every day and it has become the norm of his life.

Inconsistency of parents in teaching children the rules and norms of behavior. This method of raising children is disgusting in that the moral core of behavior is not formed in children: today it is convenient for parents to say one thing, and they impose this line of behavior on children, tomorrow it is convenient for them to say something else, which is again imposed on children.

This leads to confusion, anger, aggression against parents and other people.

In upbringing, two pairs of important signs can be distinguished that positively or negatively affect the formation of children's aggressiveness: disposition and rejection.

How is disposition characterized and how does it affect overcoming aggressiveness? The family helps the child:

a) overcome difficulties;

b) uses in his arsenal the ability to listen to a child;

c) includes warmth, a kind word, an affectionate look in communication.

Rejection, on the other hand, stimulates children's aggressiveness. It is characterized by indifference, withdrawal from communication, intolerance and imperiousness, hostility to the fact of the child's existence. Rejection of the child leads to the manifestation of such a disease as children's hospitalism. What it is? Loneliness, lack of desire to communicate with loved ones, lack of traditions, customs, laws in the family.

Encouragement is of great importance in raising children: by word, glance, gesture, action. Punishment is also very significant for a person if:

a) it immediately follows the misconduct;

b) explained to the child;

c) it is harsh, but not cruel;

d) it evaluates the actions of the child, and not his human qualities. When punishing the child, the father and mother show patience, calmness and restraint.

One of the main conditions for preventing the aggressive behavior of children is the exactingness of parents in relation to themselves and in relation to their own child. A parent who is demanding towards himself will never allow him to demand from his child that which he himself does not have in his child. A demanding parent is able to analyze the methods of his upbringing and correct them taking into account the current situation.

However, parents should remember that exactingness is not tyranny. Tyranny breeds tyranny. Demanding should be reasonable and benevolent.

Very often, children's aggressiveness is associated precisely with the fact that parents show unfounded and meaningless demands, absolutely not showing friendliness and support. One should not give in to whims and make indulgences unnecessarily.

For example, if there are “easy lessons” at school and the parents think that there is no need to go there, you should not write a note that the child is feeling bad. In a couple of years, he himself will write a note to the teacher and sign for his father or mother.

Demanding in relation to the child must be reasonable. Being demanding, it is necessary to reckon with the circumstances, with the physical and mental state of the child.

Demandingness is justified when feasible tasks are put forward before the child and feasible help is provided in their solution, otherwise it is simply meaningless. Even the most just and uncomplicated demand, if it is not explained and expressed in an arbitrary form, will provoke the resistance of any child, even the most agreeable.

The only difference is that an agreeable child will express protest covertly, and a child who is not very flexible will express it openly. It is better to express the requirements for younger students in a fun way.

In their methods of upbringing, in presenting exactingness to the child, parents must be consistent and united. As soon as secrets from each other settle in the family, the parents' trust in each other in the upbringing of the child disappears, this will give the child the opportunity to maneuver between the parents, blackmail them, lie to them.

If this succeeds for a long time, and then a ban is imposed, then, as a rule, the result is a manifestation of aggressiveness on the part of the child.

Conversation with parents "The road through the eyes of children"

Target: organization of joint activities of parents and teachers for the prevention of child road traffic injuries, raising the culture of road users.

Tasks: Encourage parents to think that compliance with traffic rules is the most important thing for preserving the life and health of their children. Tell parents about the psychophysical characteristics of primary school children and how this affects safe behavior on the road.

Preliminary preparation of materials for parenting meetings :

    All sorts of signs, different sizes, colors, shapes, are drawn on the chalkboard in advance.

    Bell

    Scarf

    Player and headphones

Event progress:

Dear Parents! Your child went to school on September 1st. Someone for the first time in the first grade, someone in the second, third ...

Not every adult complies with the Rules of the Road, and small children find themselves in a big world, where they are not yet familiar with everything. The child is used to being taken to kindergarten every morning by his parents and taken away. All responsibility lies with the parents. The child does not decide where to cross the road, does not choose a safe path and, even in most cases, does not look at traffic signals, he simply follows the parent, holding his hand. Starting to go to school, he has to face a difficult task, teachers and parents should teach him how to be safe on the roads of our city.

With this task, we must explain to the child how to protect ourselves, instill in him skills, while we must take into account his psychophysical characteristics.

Today we will try to look at the road through the eyes of children.

Look at the board, on it I have drawn completely unfamiliar signs for you, they are of different shapes and colors, some objects, arrows, circles are depicted on them. What do they mean to you? What are they telling you? About nothing. Because they are not familiar to you. So are the children. Seeing road signs on the road, many children do not know what they mean. Very often they confuse the warning sign "pedestrian crossing", from the road sign of special instructions "pedestrian crossing".

Now let’s whoever sits on the first desk put on headphones and turn on the music, and who on the second desk behind him will ring the bell.

In two minutes. Parents who were listening to music took off their headphones. Have you heard what signal your parents gave you from the second desk? No, there was music in the headphones. Likewise, a child, listening to music through the headphones of the player, will not hear the signals of the car. It is absolutely necessary to explain to the child that it is absolutely impossible to listen to music on headphones while he is going to school! Otherwise it can lead to disaster.

At primary school age, attention is still poorly distributed: children often look in only one direction, they still have "tunnel vision". Each of you has two sheets of cardboard on your desk, put it to your face on one side and the other. What do you see? You see the board in front of you and me, you don't see your neighbor to the right and left. The same applies to children, they see a green traffic light and are confident that everything goes to the roadway normally, at this time they cannot see the cars on the right and left. Each time, approaching the roadway, you need to tell your child: look to the left, then to the right, so that it becomes a habit for him. Explain to your child that a green traffic light is not a guarantee of a safe crossing.

Now let's play with the bell again. Let's blindfold someone's choice now. Now all other parents start making noise, rustling notebooks, you can even move chairs. At this time I will walk around the classroom and ring the bell.

Remove the bandage. Did you know where the sound of the bell came from, from which corner of the classroom? If they understood, then approximately, not exactly. So is your child. The child is often not yet able to pinpoint the exact source of the sound. A child may not hear the sound of an approaching car or other signal, not because he cannot distinguish them, but because he lacks constant attention.

Young children transfer their ideas from the microcosm of toys to the real world. For example, the belief that real vehicles can actually stop in place as instantly as toy vehicles.

Experiment with your child. Ask him to scatter and stop. Watching this, see how many more steps he takes before finally stopping. Explain to him using this example that vehicles also cannot stop in one second, no matter how much the driver wants to.

Today we have considered only some options for the road through the eyes of children, but from them I think you have drawn conclusions.

Conclusion:

It is necessary that the most important thing is not forgotten for all the worries - the road: the road to school, the road home. And if, one day, going to work, you hear from a child's mouth instructions on attentiveness already addressed to you, then your efforts were not in vain.

What is a kindergarten holiday? As many years of experience have shown, parents do not always correctly assess the situation and understand the meaning of these words. First of all, a holiday in a kindergarten is a program event.

For each age group, there is a list of holiday events according to age and program requirements. The main list includes: the holiday of Autumn, New Year, March 8 and the graduation ball in the preparatory group for school. These are holidays where parents and guests are allowed.

A holiday in a kindergarten is a great work done by the entire team of kindergarten employees, children and their parents. The holiday is a common cause!

A few words about parental responsibility.

The schedule of the holiday in the group is posted in advance, so make sure that on this day you are released from work on time. If you are late, then calmly go up to the group, where you can leave the upper things and change your shoes. And after waiting for the end of a poem, song, or dance, slowly enter the hall.
Don't overwhelm your children. A party in a group is a very responsible event, and a serious psychological load for your child. You should not order a ticket to the circus or to a puppet show for the evening of the same day. Perhaps, for the sake of the holiday, you will have to skip some additional classes (discuss this in advance with the teacher and with the child).
Coming to the music hall - watch your appearance. A child's holiday is also your holiday. Do not forget to bring replacement shoes, it is better if these are shoes, not shoe covers. There is a carpet on the floor in the music room, and your children walk on it, sit on it, and even lie on it during class. Therefore, hygiene issues matter in this case.
The appearance of the child is also important. For girls, a beautiful dress (not to the floor), for a boy, trousers and a white shirt with a bow tie and tie, if the child does not need a role-playing costume. Pay attention to comfortable shoes, if there are none, then it can be ballet flats or gym shoes (for senior and preparatory groups).
When photographing a child at a holiday - do it discreetly. You do not need to call him loudly and ask him to come forward and take a certain pose. Do not forget about discipline, which is so difficult to instill and maintain in a children's team. Collective video filming has proven itself well.
Be responsibly preparing the costume and learning words for your child's festive performance. When learning a poem for the holiday with your child, pay attention to expressiveness, control the correct pronunciation, stress in words, punctuation.
You should not demand the main role for your child. Believe me, teachers and specialists know better in what part of the holiday to involve the child, so that what he does is pleasant and brings him joy. Know how to observe your child not only at the moment of reading a poem. Observe:
- does your child know the words of common songs?

How emotional is he at the moment of their performance?

Does he perform the dance moves correctly?

Is he able to do without the teacher's advice?

Does he show interest in what is happening?

Would you like to take part in games and contests?

Does he know how to listen to others?

Discipline?

Acting as a team?

What about spatial thinking?

If you want to show your child's additional skills, playing an instrument, professionally staged dance, artistic reading of a poem ... then tell the music director about this in advance, who will support and, if possible, help your creative endeavors.
After the holiday, the children and the teacher go to the group in an organized manner, the parents leave the hall after that. By the way, at the moment you have the opportunity to talk with the music director, discuss the successes or not * successes of your child.
Be sure to discuss the holiday with your child: what characters he remembered, what he liked the most, note how happy you are that he sings so beautifully, dances, how well he behaved ... .. Make a comment, if necessary.

And finally, I would like to say that a holiday is, first of all, an opportunity to have a cultural rest, to have fun and to express ourselves creatively, therefore it is in our power to make sure that it is not overshadowed by anything. For kindergarten employees, this is a report on the work done, an opportunity to adjust and plan the direction of their future work. For parents, the performance of our children is an opportunity to look at their child in a new way, evaluate and diagnose the degree of his age and psychological development, draw appropriate conclusions and correct the course of his upbringing in time, if necessary.

Age of family members, degree of relationship?

2. What is your education, profession, where do you work, what is your working regime?

3. How do you assess your relationship with children? Are your relationships with children manifested in the family? How do you manage the behavior of children?

5. What radio and television programs do you regularly listen to and watch with the whole family? Do you exchange impressions?

6. How do you usually spend your free time, weekends?

7. Do you like to go to school? Does communication with teachers, class teachers help you?

8. Is there a leader in your family? Who is this?

9. Do you show an interest in your children's school life? Do you know about their relationship with teachers, schoolmates?

10. How do you spend your leisure time? Do your children participate in it?

11. What family traditions are supported in your family? What influence do they have on the upbringing of children?

12. Do children take part in the preparation of family holidays?

13. To what extent are other family members involved in raising children?

15. Do you think that you understand your children, respect their interests, creative attempts?

17. What kind of help in raising your child do you need from the school?

Parent's meeting outline

Psychological comfort in the family

Goals: convince parents of the need to maintain psychological comfort in the family for the correct development of the child, the formation of his personality; give recommendations for resolving conflict situations that arise in the family.

Invited specialists: school psychologist.

Meeting progress

I. Introductory remarks by the class teacher.

The main reason leading to the emergence of certain difficulties in the behavior of a healthy child, psychologists consider, first of all, the imperfection of human relationships in the first collective in his life - in his family. The peculiarities of the family microclimate determine the behavior of the closest adults - mothers, fathers, grandmothers, grandfathers, brothers and sisters.
And the child, not realizing any hidden and even explicit conflicts, emotionally perceives either thunderous tension, or constant anxiety and fear, or, if he is lucky, a beneficial feeling of peace, joy, comfort.

Of course, no one deliberately creates an emotionally unfavorable climate for their child. The family lives the way they used to live, it happens that they quarrel, shout, offend each other. Nothing wrong with that. And the child? Well, it is, more often than not, not taken into account.

This point of view is the most common.

But is it right? Let's figure it out. I invite you, dear parents, to a serious conversation.

II. Reporting theoretical information on the topic "Psychological comfort in the family."

1. What do "positive" and "negative" mean.

School psychologist... Let's start by comparing the speed of action of the "bacillus of laughter" and the speed of the squall action of panic. I think you will agree that the difference will be too obvious to prove it.

"Joy creeps like a snail, grief has a frantic run ..."

You can spoil a person's good mood very quickly, but how difficult it is to restore it later!

What emotional state (mood) is considered good? When ... good! And everything around, and people somehow dispose, and the work is argued, and breathes with pleasure!

Then there is a rise or at least a rise of all potencies, all possibilities! The creative forces grow, the general vitality increases. That is why everything colored in light emotional tones is called positive: positive emotions, positive psychological state, positive attitude ...

But the relationship is “spoiled”, “the mood is spoiled” ... The picture changes dramatically: everything “falls out of hand”, “the head does not work”, “the heart is so hard, there are simply no words” ... That is why these states are called negative: they reduce the level of vital activity.

All negative emotional states easily pass from one person to another, easily capture and do not let go for a long time. Even despondency, boredom, apathy, depression - for all their apparent "harmlessness" - deprive a person of working capacity and the urge to seek a rational way out of these states.
And they have a depressing effect on those who are nearby! That is why, even in relation to them, we can talk about the aggressiveness of negative emotional states.

Negative emotional stress narrows the work of consciousness. And the stronger it is, the less consciousness participates in what a person does. And what does he do in this case? He wants to throw something away, throw it away, crush, break, tear, smash, in order to give vent to this tension! In fact, all the "activity" of a person who is in the power of such a state comes down to this.

Why is it so difficult to get a good mood back? The fact is that negative states absorb a huge amount of the body's human reserves. And to restore a positive emotional state, compensation for waste is needed. It takes time! In the meantime, a chain reaction of infection of other people with irritation, nervousness is created, so a person throws out all his negativity outward.

Negative emotional states are especially harmful in our communication with children: by reducing the level of vital activity, they not only undermine educational productivity, but also contain a great affective explosiveness and conflict potential of great destructive force.

That is why we are talking about psychological comfort in the family, since the development of the child largely depends on this.

2. Family climate and child.

Most of us completely ignore the emotional needs of the child, in fact, ignore them, considering it an unnecessary luxury. But this is more important to the child than the material attributes of wealth.

Material values, their abundance - this is for adults to rejoice, causing each other to envy. And for the child, emotional peace, peaceful and joyful communication with parents, stable and reliable contact with them are still incomparably more important.

The child receives the experience of communication, understanding of another person, his goals, aspirations, motives for his actions and feelings in his own family.

Do you know that if a child is brought up from birth in an orphanage or boarding school, then he is greatly behind in development? Why it happens? Moreover, the lag in the field of intelligence is leveled out with proper organization of education, but in the emotional field, a child who did not receive appropriate contacts in childhood remains "blind" for life.

Sometimes a similar, although not always so sharply expressed, picture of development, or rather, underdevelopment of the emotional sphere, is found in children who have an outwardly full-fledged family.

There are several types of such families.

The first is when the child (especially his experiences) is not paid attention, is limited only to the necessary care for him, dress, feed, treat, doing all this indifferently or with poorly hidden irritation.

The second is the family, where the rejecting position of the parents is not so clearly expressed, but it does not do much less harm. Children in such families are often unexpected, unwanted. They are awaited without joy, they are often perceived as a complication in the life of adults, a hindrance. If, moreover, the birth of a child is not approved by the mother's parents, friends, then a rejection position towards the child is gradually formed in the family.

Children react to this situation in different ways. Some are isolated, alienated from emotionally "cold" parents, trying to find a loved one among other adults. Others - plunge into a fantasy world, inventing friends, family, trying to solve their problems, at least in a fabulous form. Some children try to please their parents in every possible way, behave flatteringly and obsequiously, and if they fail, they begin to draw attention to themselves in other available ways - hysterics, aggression. They seem to take revenge on their parents for indifference and dislike.

The peculiarities of the family microclimate largely affect the appearance of certain deviations in the behavior of the child, which in the future can become decisive.

3. How to react to the actions of children.

The family climate largely depends on how we react to any child's action, if it contradicts our expectations and desires. How is it usually? We react immediately, immediately and in our usual familiar form: for one mother it is a slap on the head, for another - a laconic "idiot", for the third - a stream of comments. Basically, we repeat monotonously the same words in our ears and in our children’s ears: “What are you doing? Who gave you permission? What do you think you're doing? How dare you! Who are you talking to like that? You don't think, so at least listen to what they say! No, you understand ... ". But they don't understand us.

Remember to stop in time, look around - this is the way to understand the child's actions, to an idea of ​​how to act in a given situation, to eliminate irritation. You are not sinless and not immune to mistakes. Neither age, nor experience, nor knowledge guarantee you the correct behavior in dealing with a child, so always consider the situation from both points of view: yours and the child. An adult's immediate emotional response to a child's misconduct, which is monotonous in form and does not include an analysis of a specific situation every time, is a direct path to conflicts with the child.

And a sincere demonstration of your upset, its understandable explanation and connection with the child's act can help; making sure that you understand what the child wanted, and offering him other, more acceptable paths to the goal; an expression of confidence that the child has understood everything and will act differently in such cases. At the same time, one should not go far beyond the limits of what has happened and generalize: "You are generally armless, you only spoil everything!" or "You will never learn to understand what is allowed and what is not."

Remember: we do not scold the child, but his act.

If you really insist that the child does not suit you (and not what he did), the child will soon begin to think that you do not love him, that he is superfluous in the family.

Many of you will ask: "So what, allow everything?" No, you don't need to allow everything, you just need to carefully approach such important things as prohibitions and restrictions.

Let's see what we prohibit, what we demand and what we expect from our children.

I must say that some parents think about these questions, others do not. They believe that it is their right as parents to prohibit or permit, and the child must immediately obey, not reason. At the same time, the nature of the prohibitions is always categorical, there are no attempts to explain to the child exactly why it is impossible. Demanding obedience without reasoning also leads to conflict. The only thing that does not happen in these cases is the ability to act reasonably in difficult and dangerous situations, find a way out of them, and imagine the possible consequences of their actions. But it is in joint thinking, reasoning about what is not allowed and why, that the makings of the ability to “think what you are doing” are laid, which we demand from the child, obviously assuming that he himself will somehow learn from our educational cries.

So, what should be prohibited to the child and how?

Some of the prohibitions are related to his safety and the safety of other people, these are the so-called unconditional bans: you can't go into fire, water, there are inedible things, etc.

There is conditional bans, which in some cases are truly strict, and in others not. For example, you cannot make noise and jump at home, where such behavior can interfere with other people or break something, and at the same time it is completely justified in the gym.

Whenever you prohibit something to a child, you should explain the reason for the prohibition and the possible consequences of an undesirable act - this is the first rule of prohibition. Only by doing it, you can reduce the number of conflict situations between parents and children.

However, remember that often our prohibitions for children are difficult to fulfill. It seems natural for us to say: "Come on, stop playing, collect everything and go to bed" or order: "Say goodbye to your friend and let's go home." It would never occur to us to disperse adults who are engaged in conversation so unceremoniously. And, in any case, we will definitely apologize to them if we are forced to disrupt their plans. But we almost never apologize to a child in such a situation.

Most of these requirements could have been avoided. And then the children will not have an oppressive, heavy feeling of latent protest against our not always fair demands, and at the same time against fair, obligatory, universal ones. How many difficulties could be avoided if we always remembered that in any conflict with a child there are at least two participants and that it is difficult not only for us with him, but also for him with us. After all, he is smaller, weaker, more inexperienced.

III. Game workshop.

School psychologist... What to do if the situation in the family is not very favorable? If parents, grandparents, children are constantly in conflict, but at the same time everyone wants to fix the situation?

The advice that we talked about earlier can help a lot, but sometimes psychocorrectional activities in the form of games can be carried out to soften the psychological climate in the family.

Let's play some of them.

1. Our Holidays.

In order to cultivate attention to each other in the family, make a calendar of birthdays and professional holidays for each of the family members together with the child. After all, if we still do not forget to celebrate birthdays, but on the Day of the Railwayman, we do not consider it necessary to remember our grandfather, who worked as a locomotive driver for many years. Or to congratulate dad on the Day of the Tankman, because he served in the tank forces. Gifts on this day can be symbolic: a birthday cake, a choir performance of your favorite song, etc.

Exercise. Try to create a holiday calendar for your family members now. Look, compare, how many holidays you have more.

2. "Let's compliment each other."

This game is great during holiday lunches or dinners. The players give each other compliments, which reflect the positive qualities of this person. For example: “What I like about Yulechka is that she is very affectionate, kind, she will always come to the rescue if someone has difficulties” or “Petya is my assistant. Yesterday he hammered a nail with three strokes, repairing a chair at my request. "

Exercise. Compliment your neighbor.

3. "Head of the family."

In this game, they find a safe way out for feelings of resentment and irritation that people have accumulated towards each other. One of the family members is appointed the head of the family for one day or evening, and he leads everyone. All the rest become children. I think very few people will be able to carry out the child's command of authority without laughing: “Have you brushed your teeth? Go to the bathroom immediately! " etc.

4. "Guess who it is."

Everyone, preparing to play, makes a list of the traits of one of the family members; the list must contain at least 10 features. The name of the person to whom these traits are attributed, of course, is not named. For example, fabulous text arrangements, for example: "If this person had a magic wand, he would ...". Listeners on the "psychological portrait" must guess who they are talking about. If everyone quickly and easily guesses this, that is, a set of traits successfully characterizes a person, then the compiler of the "portrait" deserves a prize (for example, candy, an extra piece of pie, etc.).

5. "Museum of hurtful memories."

The players are invited to make a list of offensive memories of the unworthy or offensive behavior of the "enemy". Then, without a word, they exchange the lists. If one of the conflicting people wants to immediately explain himself, then he is asked to wait three days. Having withstood this period, the players (without witnesses) from memory or according to their own list announce aloud their claims to each other. Further, the possibility of mutual destruction of separate "accusatory points" is discussed, that is, it turns out whether each of them has at least one point, about which one can say: "From now on, I agree to believe that this did not happen." Having made sure that such an agreement is possible, the conflicting ones should move on and "exchange" some accusatory points, proceeding from the principle: "If you are ready to forget me this and that, I will forget this and that for you." Further, both players may have points on which no agreement has been reached. Would one be willing to apologize to the other for at least something on the list? Suppose no, nobody wants to. Well, that's game over. Its external performance may seem wrong. But believe me, this is not the case. The very fact of discussing conflict situations is a psychotherapeutic action, and the relationship between these two will noticeably warmer.

As you can see, there are many ways to improve the psychological climate in the family. The main thing is that all family members participate in these or other similar games. And then they will help maintain a spirit of cooperation, attention to each other, a playful atmosphere in your family.

During games, both children and adults are included in the everyday world of communication, which contributes to its ordering and cleansing of unnecessary demands from both sides, they learn to find a way out of conflict situations, to value their loved ones. Try to play these games with your families and I think you will find that the psychological climate will significantly soften.

IV. Final word.

Classroom teacher. It is well known that cardiovascular diseases are in the first place in terms of the frequency of diseases. If not the source, then the trigger mechanism is tense moments of communication - discord, quarrels, clashes. The overwhelming majority of neuroses are associated with these same moments - disorders of mood, well-being and performance of a person without any organic reasons. There is also reason to believe that many cases of drug addiction, substance abuse, alcoholism are due to the lack of psychological comfort in the closest circle of friends - the family. Therefore, listen to the recommendations of a psychologist. Believe me, in the simple games offered to you, in which your children will play with pleasure, you can yourself and teach your loved ones to find a relaxed relaxedness in communication, and this will have a beneficial effect on the psychological climate. I wish you success!

How to prepare and conduct

individual conversation with parents

Of course, every conversation between a teacher, educator, class teacher and the student's parents should be of pedagogical benefit. Unfortunately, even experienced pedagogical workers often conduct such conversations spontaneously, unprepared and as a result, they get an aggravation of relations with parents, which ultimately does not benefit either side, but, on the contrary, leads to a deterioration of the psychological climate both in the classroom and in the family. ...

Therefore, the most important goal of the teacher's communication with parents is to form an attitude towards interaction in working with them. The main thing is to get to know and understand better your student for one side and your child for the other.

Teachers and educators who visit parents at home or conduct an individual conversation should first think over the topic of the conversations, determine what their tone should be, what conversations should be conducted without children, what are the features of family upbringing and the level of culture of this family.

Main directions of work

class teacher

to study student families

Family structure and ethnic composition:

Complete, incomplete, undivided;

One-child, large;

Family with step children;

Mono and multinational.

Living conditions and environment:

The educational level of family members;

Employment;

Professional staff;

Budget; general material security: an apartment, a garden, a personal plot, the presence of household appliances and cultural objects;

Rural or urban family;

Territorial features: a family living in a new neighborhood, in a neighborhood with positive or negative traditions.

Family scope:

Economic: ways of obtaining, distributing, consuming material goods;

Household: the distribution of responsibilities between family members in the organization of serving the urgent needs of the family team and its individual members.

Cultural potential of the family:

The general culture of everyday life, including the presence of a daily and weekly routine, time planning, forms of rest and work;

Organization of free time, the right to free time with different family members;

The presence of a need for the cultural development of individual family members and the entire family collective and the ability to use the cultural values ​​available in the family:

library, TV, musical instrument;

The presence of pedagogical literature in the family and what parents read about upbringing;

Family traditions, holidays;

The culture of family communication.

Intra-family relations:

General characteristics of the family microclimate;

Commonality and difference in the system of views and values;

The attitude of family members to their duties;

The nature of the relationship between parents, parents and children, parents and other relatives, including the presence in the family of uniform requirements for children;

The emotional and motivational aspect of these relationships;

Position in relation to society:

Attitude towards labor, social duties;

Attitude towards raising children as a socially significant, civic responsibility;

Attitude towards institutions of public education;

To the public's impact on the family microclimate;

Consumer, egoistic or altruistic position in relation to society;

Moral health of the micro-society.

Family upbringing potential:

The moral ideals and needs of the family, including the system of views on the family, ideas about family well-being, family happiness, the meaning of life;

Awareness of the rights and responsibilities of family members, awareness of the goals of raising children and responsibility for the quality of upbringing a harmoniously developed personality and the ways of its formation;

Methods of educational influence on the child and on all family members; what measures of encouragement and punishment are applied to children;

The level of pedagogical culture of parents and other family members who enter into the functions of educators.

QUESTIONNAIRE

to study student families

    Your surname, name, patronymic.

    Education.

    Home address, phone number.

    Your place of work, position held, work phone number.

    Mode of operation.

    How many children do you have in your family; what is their age; where do they study or work?

    What are your hobbies in your free time?

    What is your child's hobby?

    What difficulties have you been experiencing lately in your relationship with your son (daughter)?

    What help do you need from the side of the school, the class teacher?

    What questions would you consider it necessary to discuss at parent-teacher meetings?

Note. Taking into account the analysis of the questionnaire survey of parents, the study of the characteristics of the families of schoolchildren, the class teachers draw up plans for educational work with students and parents for the new academic year.

Forms of interaction between teachers and parents

The forms of interaction between teachers and parents are the diversity of the organization of their joint activities and communication.

Parents' meeting is one of the main forms of work with parents. It discusses the problems of life of class and parent groups. The class teacher guides the parents in the preparation process. Meetings should not be limited to a teacher's monologue. This is a mutual exchange of views, ideas, a joint search. The topics of the meetings can be varied: “We are one family”, “On kindness and mercy”, “Learning to communicate”, “Psychological climate in a team”, etc.

Of particular concern for teachers and educators is interaction with fathers of children: how to involve fathers in educational activities in the classroom, to increase their role in raising a child. To this end, the class teacher and educator should organize special meetings with the fathers of children, hold a conference, reflections, a meeting "The role of the father in raising children", etc.

Many educational institutions, taking into account modern requirements, have significantly diversified the very form of the parent meeting. It can take the form of a "round table", a thematic discussion of the parents themselves with the invitation of specialists in whom the family is interested, consultations with specialists, etc.

Organization of joint activities of parents and children

One of the main tasks of teachers and an educational institution is cooperation and expansion of the field of positive communication in the family, the implementation of plans for organizing joint affairs of parents and children. In general education schools, the only social institution through which almost all children pass, various forms of interaction with the family have developed.

Forms of cognitive activity: public forums of knowledge, creative reports on subjects, days of open lessons, holidays of knowledge and creativity, tournaments of experts, joint Olympiads, publication of subject newspapers, meetings, reports of scientific societies of students, etc. parents can help in design, preparation of incentive prizes, evaluation of results, directly participate in events, creating their own or mixed teams. These can be contests: "Family is a polymath", "Family hobby".

Forms of work: decoration of classrooms, landscaping and landscaping of the school yard, planting alleys, creating a class library; exhibitions "The World of Our Hobbies", etc.

The effectiveness of the educational system of an educational institution is characterized, along with other factors, by interaction with the family, the approval of parents as subjects of a holistic educational process along with teachers and children.

Build a positive relationship between you and your child.

    Talk to your teen in a friendly, respectful manner. Restrain your criticism and create positivism in communicationwith him. The tone should only show respect for the teenager,as a person.

    Be firm and kind at the same time. An adult must befriendly and not acting as a judge.

    Take control off. Control over a teenager requires specialattention of adults. Retaliatory anger rarely leads to success.

    Support your teen. Unlike an award, supportis needed even when it does not succeed.

    Have courage. Behavior change takes practice and patience.

    Show mutual respect. An adult must deMonstrous trust in the teenager, confidence in him and respectto him as a person.

BASIC TYPES OF RELATIONSHIP BETWEEN PARENTS AND TEENAGERS

1. Emotional rejection. Usually it is hidden, since the roparents unknowingly suppress dislike for the child as unworthyfeeling. Indifference to the inner world of the child, disguisedwith exaggerated care and control, unmistakably huhgiven by a child.

    Emotional indulgence. The child is the center of the whole life of adults, upbringing is like a “family idol”. Love treimpatient and suspicious, the child is defiantly protected from "resentmentchikov ". Since the exclusivity of such a child is recognizedonly at home, he will have relationship problemswith peers.

    Authoritarian control. Upbringing is the main business of lifeparents. But the main educational line is manifested in prohibitionsand in manipulating the child. The result is paradoxical: brought upthere is no significant effect, even if the child obeys: he cannotmake decisions yourself. This type of parenting entails one thingof two: either socially unacceptable forms of child behavior,or low self-esteem.

    Conniving non-interference. Adults takingdecisions are more often guided by mood rather than pedagogical principles and goals. Their motto is: less hassle. Control weakenedflax, the child is left to himself in choosing a company, acceptingsolutions.

The adolescents themselves consider demoratic education, when there is no superiority of an adult.

FUNDAMENTAL RULES,

WHAT PARENTS SHOULD CONSIDER

IN INTERACTION WITH ADOLESCENTS

    Rules, restrictions, requirements, prohibitions, mustus to be in the life of every teenager. This is especially useful for parents who want to upset their children as little as possible and avoidconflicts with them. As a result, they follow their own lead.child. This is a permissive parenting style.

    There should not be too many rules, restrictions, requirements, prohibitions, and they should be flexible. This rule precedesguards against the other extreme - education in the spirit of "twistingnuts ”, an authoritarian style of communication.

    Parental attitudes should not be in clear opposition tospeech with the most important needs of the child (needs for movementlearning, cognition, exercise, communication with peers, opinionwhom they respect more than adults).

    Rules, restrictions, requirements must be agreedadults among themselves. Otherwise, children preferinsist, whine, extort.

    The tone by which the demand and the prohibition are communicated must befriendly, explanatory, not imperative.

    About punishments. No one is immune from misunderstandings andthere will be a moment when you will need to respond to clearly badadolescent behavior. When punishing a teenager, it is more correct to deprive him ofgood than doing bad to him.

It is important to remember that it is much easier to prevent the occurrence of laborproblems than to overcome them later.

INFORMATION FOR TEACHERS AND PARENTS

Behavioral deviations in children and adolescents can becaught by the following groups of reasons:

    social and pedagogical neglect when a child,a teenager behaves incorrectly due to his bad manners, lack of the necessary positive knowledge,skills, or due to spoilage by improper upbringing, the formation of negative stereotypes in himbehavior;

    deep mental discomfort caused by the dysfunction of family relationships, negative psichological microclimate in the family, systematiceducational failures, poor relationshipswith peers in the class team, wrong (wrongsqueamish, rude, cruel) attitude towards him fromparents, teachers, classmates, etc .;

    deviations in the state of mental and physical conditionhealth and development, age-related crises, accentuationcharacter and other reasons of neuropsychiatricand physiological properties;

    lack of conditions for self-expression, reasonable manifestationexternal and internal activity; not busy are usefulactivities, lack of positive and significantsocial and personal, life goals and plans;

    neglect, negative influence of the environmentenvironment and developing on this basis of social and psychologicalgic maladjustment, a shift in social and personal values ​​from positive to negative.

USEFUL TIPS FOR PARENTS,

CARE OF MIND HEALTH

AND THE HAPPINESS OF YOUR CHILDREN

    Create a safe psychological base for your child in his softwareclaims, to which he could return, having met on his wayfailures.

    Support your child's creativity and exercisethose empathy for early failure, explaining what it takes to be successfultime and patience.

    Develop volitional qualities, foster healthy productivity:

    Forming priorities in activities

    Teaching Specific Goal Setting

    Teaching time allocation

    Teaching the division of any activity into stages

    Leave your child alone and let him knowtoss about their own affairs.

    Help learn to build his value system.

    Help meet basic human needsnost.

    Help him deal with frustration and doubt.

    Help your child learn more about himself. To do this, develop:

    confidence based on the consciousness of self-esteem;

    understanding the merits and demerits in oneself and others;

    the ability to communicate with any people.

Remember that the child creates not only for himself, but also for thosewhom he loves.

    Help your child to avoid public disapproval, while remembering that his behavior should not go beyonddecent.

    Respect your child's personality. Do not aim procite your own interests and hobbies on him.

TIPS FOR PARENTS

If your child is afraid.

    the first step is to find out the cause of the fear;

    when choosing educational activities, keep in mind thatfears are involuntary and unconscious;

    remember that the child cannot always control his behavior and does not control himself, therefore verbal convictions are noteffective;

    do not punish the child in any way;

    do not intimidate the child even if you are afraid for his safetydanger;

    do not remind the child of the fear.

    do not overuse reading fairy tales and watching movies;

    teach your child to tolerate and manage fear, and notwhich cases and countering the sources of fear;

    if the child is afraid of the dark and confined space, forburn the lamp, open the doors, stay next to him;

    try to play the child's scary event in a specialrole-playing game, where the scary seems funny orcommonplace for everyday life. For example, a child is afraiddogs, play with him at the border guard, where he will bewith a beloved dog, or let a toy dogtell him what she thinks of him (how worried whenthe child ran away from her);

    give the child pencils, let him draw his fears untiluntil you get rid of them;

    look for your own way to overcome fear in your child, teachdeveloping his individual personality traits. The main thingdo not force the child to do what he is not yet able to dolact;

Raising a child in a family

Rule 1. Recognition of the identity of the child and his inviolabilitynosti. Absence of arbitrariness in the actions of the father and mother.

Rule 2. Formation of adequate self-esteem. Humanwith low self-esteem is constantly dependent on someone else's opinion, consideringitself is insufficient. -

The formation of a child's self-esteem depends on the assessment of his parents, since at an early age the child does not yet know how to evaluate himself.

Rule 3. Involve in real family affairs. Can aboutlead a mini meeting with the participation of all family members, jointly plan family affairs.

Rule 4. Develop the willpower of the child. Teach you to manifestendurance, courage, masculinity, patience. Learn to applyefforts to achieve the goal.

Rule 5. Learn to plan. Draw up an action plan. PainIt is a great and complex matter to break down into a series of specific actions.

Rule 6. From an early age to engage in work. Require fulfillmenthousehold chores, errands. You can set up your homemanufacturing - learning a craft, increasing self-esteem, getting closerfamily members.

Rule 7. To teach to communicate with other children, people. Moedel parental behavior.

Rule 8. To form moral qualities: kindness, byline-up, sympathy, mutual assistance, responsibility.

PARADOXES OF ADOLESCENT PSYCHE

Adolescence is the peak of activity, above all phiphysical time of rapid restructuring of the body, which dictatesspecific "paradoxes of adolescent psyche":

    The teenager wants to break out of adult care, getfreedom, while not knowing what to do with it: he wants to express himself, but does not know how.

    The teenager seeks to have his own face, "to stand out from the crowd.py "- with complete merging with your environment," to be like everyone else "-in the company, in the classroom, in the yard, etc.

    Everything is interesting at once and nothing.

    I want everything, right away, and if later - "then why then?"

    For all his self-confidence, a teenager is very insecure.