One married couple celebrated their divorce with a ball. Funny jokes about divorce. Divorce position in Islam

It is customary to celebrate a wedding noisily and cheerfully, and a holiday in honor of divorce is the exception rather than the rule. The more interesting it was for us to find such examples.

OPTION 1: WITH THE SAME SUCCESS

“My ex-husband and friends and I celebrated our divorce: a white car with ribbons, I was in a red dress (the one in which I got married) with a bouquet of white and red flowers, he was in a tuxedo. We went to traditional wedding venues in Moscow, took pictures, drank champagne. Towards the end of the walk on Vorobyovy Gory, they solemnly took off their wedding rings and threw them into the Moskva River. We got into different cars with the words "Just Divorced!" and parted in different directions to meet at a feast in his dad's bachelor apartment. And then - congratulations: "With the beginning of a new life!", Flowers, gifts, shouts "Sweet!", In the finale of the evening - fireworks. There were also tears. With happiness and gratitude that close people supported us that day in our decision. Now my ex-husband and I are best friends, we often chat on the phone for hours, laugh, claims have almost disappeared from our conversations, we have ceased to consider ourselves to be something obliged to each other. To the question of those around you: "Wouldn't you like to get back together again?" I answer: "Why spoil such a wonderful relationship?" Svetlana, 27, Moscow

OPTION 2: GIRL

“When I received the court's decision, I was literally dancing. My sister turned the sound of the radio to maximum and shouted: “You are back! Hurray! ”(Ex-husband limited my communication with friends). In the evening, friends gathered near my house. At the entrance - a surprise, the same car as at my wedding, only black. I am wearing a black dress, black boots. I go out, my girls pounce on me with congratulations, camera flashes (I ordered a photographer), then we go for a drive around the city. Then - the restaurant. The hall is decorated with balls and candles. And above the table is a large balloon with the inscription "Kostya" (the name of her ex-husband). At the end of the party, I threw a dart and pierced this ball. My sister gave me a bouquet of yellow-blue flowers and a T-shirt with the inscription "Ivanova I" (my maiden name). The culmination of the evening was a cake in the form of a Lexus IS 250 (my husband wanted to sue me). On the roof is a figurine of a girl in a black dress that looks like me. The bridegroom lay in jam under the wheels. The idea was appreciated! The holiday was a success! " Elena, 23, Irkutsk

OPTION 3: QUIETLY PEACE

“We divorced my husband (a foreigner) on my initiative. I fell in love with another and wanted to be with him. I came to court with my beloved man, and my husband with an interpreter. The judge looked at her husband, looked at me (at that moment I was six months pregnant from my beloved), listened to the explanations: "We are getting divorced due to different views in life," property matters. Verdict: "We are equally guilty." She wrote out a fine. And that's all. After the trial, I, my beloved man, ex-husband and an interpreter went into a cafe and celebrated the divorce in a cozy atmosphere. They drank tea with cakes, talked, recalled their experiences. A few years later, the ex-husband left with his second wife (he again married a Russian) and our two daughters to their homeland. But we are still family friends ”. Lyudmila, 39, Kaliningrad

HAVE AN OPINION

Psychologist and author of the book "Seven Steps to a Successful Divorce" American Lara Davis believes that it is useful for former spouses to have a common divorce party: “Your common life belongs not only to you, but also to your friends and relatives. They have a right to know what's going on. " Lara is sure: if the spouses are in plain sight on that day, it will be easier for them to survive the divorce, and they will not have to feel like a fragile figurine that loved ones are afraid to drop or injure. Another argument in favor of the party: "With its help, the spouses have a better chance of maintaining friendly relations and communication."

70% OF DIVORCE WOMEN HAVE A LONG CUT TO THE PAST AND DO NOT ALLOW THEMSELVES TO Tune into the PRESENT AND DARE TO LOOK INTO THE FUTURE.

OPTION 4: ALL IN CLOTH

“On this day I took a day off, slept well and rushed to another city - to get a divorce. The relationship came to naught, but we continued to communicate on friendly terms. My husband met me at the airport with a bouquet of roses and a huge soft toy, a gray wolf (his name is Sergei). After the paperwork was completed, my friends and I went out of town for a barbecue. On the sandy shore, we held a photo session and filmed a video in the style of Trash the Wedding Dress. We fooled around, rolled on the sand, painted each other with fake blood. When it got dark, they burned the wedding dresses at the stake and launched two heart-shaped balloons into the sky. As a sign that our hearts are free for new love. I liked this day more than our wedding. " Ekaterina, 26, St. Petersburg

NATIONAL FEATURES

• In Italy, anti-wedding photo albums are popular, in which former spouses keep footage taken on the day of their divorce.
• Postcards with the words "Happy Divorce!" Are not uncommon in Canada.
• In the US, two books are boldly claiming the title of bestseller: The Divorce Party Planner and Seven Steps to Separating with Success.

OPTION 5: FOR FREEDOM

“On the day of her divorce, a friend invited me to a bar, she was straightforward:“ I want to get drunk. ” How not to support a friend ?! There were many visitors to the establishment. The waiter brought our order, we raised the first toast: "To her, to freedom!" Then the second: "For him, let him be happy!" After two glasses, the friend perked up, grew bolder and ... went to the stage. I saw her talking about something with a musician. He smiles in response and nods his head. And now she is already in front of the microphone: “Dear friends! I got divorced today. On this occasion, I ordered Valery Kipelov's song "I'm Free". Let my now ex-husband find his happiness - the kind he wants, and most importantly, deserves! " At first, a deathly silence reigned in the hall, which in a moment was blown up by a flurry of exclamations, applause and shouts of "Congratulations!" The audience supported the choice of the song, then it was ordered twice more. … During the third performance, after the words “There is no more room for you in my soul,” my friend began to cry. Sometimes one of the couple wants a divorce, and it takes time to get over it. One after another women sat down at our table, calmed down, advised something, shared their stories. The men were sympathetic and silent and drank. But this is not the end of the story! A few hours later, in that very bar, my friend met Him, as it soon turned out, the future husband! " Sofia, 31, Yekaterinburg

SWEETE THE PILL

Confectioners from the USA and Europe have recipes for anti-wedding cakes. All the ingredients in them are the same as in weddings, but the decorative elements allow imagination to roam. According to Suzanne Maxwell, the owner of a bakery in Texas, such cakes can be decorated with fallen wedding rings, and inverted doves, and broken wedding bells, and caricatures of ex-wives and husbands. Florida-based pastry chef Larry Bach offers ex-spouses an upside-down wedding cake or decorates dessert with murder scenes (usually a man unlucky in them). Georgius Vasiliu, a baker from Berlin, has been making similar cakes since 2005. Instead of roses - an edible portrait of the ex-spouse. Englishwoman Faye Miller creates marzipan scenes of marital scandals, packed suitcases, brides with guns and knives. Prices for her creative range from $ 100 to $ 1300.

Divorce in our country is considered to be something like the end of the world, which needs to be mourned for several months, mentally tuning in to a sad old age alone. Perhaps the current generation of 30-year-old individualists will be the first to prove by their own example that divorce is as normal an event as moving or changing jobs, so you should not go deeper into a prolonged depression with its onset. And it is better to consolidate the mutually accepted decision with a joint funny photo and throw a small holiday on the occasion of a new round of personal freedom.

1 Sep 2015 at 6:02 am PDT

The post-divorce selfie idea, or #divorceselfie, became a hot topic on the Internet last week thanks to gay Canadian couple Chris and Shannon Neumann, who, instead of getting divorced “normally” with sad mines and sharing wedding services, did it with dignity. , with humor and with the front camera of his smartphone, immortalizing the moment with a positive selfie. In the caption to the photo, where the ex-spouses are already smiling as if they had just got engaged, Chris and Shannon shared their thoughts on divorce as “something wonderful” and promised to raise children together so that they do not have to be torn between living separately and feuding parents. Judging by the comments on social networks, our Russian-speaking audience did not appreciate such an innovative way to dissolve a marriage (oh god, did they not even grab each other's hair?) ex-spouses in the photo are hypocrites and selfie maniacs. Who is right here and is it really possible to get a divorce "elegantly", that is, without the massacre, insults and malicious looks of Medusa the Gorgon, is it some kind of art that is not yet available in our country (which, by the way, is the leader in the world number of divorces) art?

1 Sep 2015 at 10:32 am PDT

However, sorting out the patriarchal logic, everything can be put in its place: if in our society marriage for a woman is the only form of life (otherwise, "old maid", "no one needs you like that", "did not take place as a woman") , then it is logical that divorce is such a “little death”, the collapse of the social status most important for many of our girls, on which (hidden or openly) the financial situation, the housing issue, and even such a character trait as vanity (“ if I was CHOSEN, then I am good / beautiful / smart / kind; if I was not chosen, then I am NOTHING ”). That is, appealing to the stupid comparison with the railroad, we do not need a wedding to note that we have found ourselves a wonderful companion in life, we need it to "hook", "attach" and then ride on someone as much as possible time, preferably without any shocks and accidents. Hence, the divorce does not come out as a completely everyday event with trains that quietly parted in different directions, but as a real train disaster, the collapse of the entire traffic system for weeks (or even months and years), which no one would certainly dream of perpetuating a picture on Instagram.

Thus, if from the very beginning you approached your future husband as a saving rope, then such an incident as a divorce acquires the highest degree of drama: everything flies into hell, and your world will never be the same. And what if from the very beginning you perceived him as an equal partner, with whom you would like to go through life together (for how long, here the fortuneteller will not predict) and were not going to die for love, put dramas in the kitchen every night and turn into a shadow of your own husband? Then the end of this story can be perceived not as an apocalypse, but as a transition to another state, and a selfie at the door of the registry office - as a test for the civilization of relations. Think, after all, if you have lived a certain number of happy days together, then it means that you have something to remember, and these memories will be even more valuable than impulsive attacks of resentment and hatred. Yes, you are not together, but you continue to live on and maybe even meet one day at a supermarket checkout or on a restaurant terrace, or even online on Facebook. Maybe someone will say that a happy divorce is as much an oxymoron as a happy funeral, but it's silly to compare them. Because divorce certainly has nothing to do with death - it is rather a new life, which is high time to celebrate no less magnificently than a wedding.

The Almighty Lord, having commanded to spouses love and harmony, the strength of family ties and the upbringing of noble offspring, determined the special nature of the family union based on love for God and rejection of the instigations of Satan.

However, not every union withstands the test of time and life circumstances. Although the preservation of the family is one of the main purposes of Islamic marriage law, dissolution is permitted. Unlike some other religious traditions, Islamic teaching does not insist on the absolute, categorically indissoluble nature of the marriage union. Calling for the strengthening of the family, patience and mutual consent of the spouses, Islam still allows divorce, remaining a religion that subtly senses the reality of life, a religion that not only calls for spiritual heights, but also takes into account the daily needs and aspirations of every person in his earthly life. "The most hateful before the Lord, but permissible [when there are no other ways to resolve the conflict] is divorce," said the Prophet Muhammad (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him).

Family unity, which began to weaken at the level of feelings or due to life problems, both personal and of any other nature, must be restored. God's final messenger said:

“A believer will not hate a believer (a believing husband will not hate a believing wife)! [Let him, her husband, do not have a feeling of hatred for her, his wife!] Even if something in her causes him displeasure [for example, a bad character, bad manners in something], then other qualities [her religiosity, for example, beauty or chastity] he is pleased. " The Qur'an says: “And if there is something you do not like about them [for example, a difficult character, bad habits, inclinations; physical disabilities, etc. are found], then [take into account, take into account] that in this or that, blamed by you, Allah (God, Lord) can lay a lot of good. [In no way rush to destroy the family, show patience and prudence, because you yourself are not perfect] ”().

If all the possibilities of preserving family ties have been exhausted and there is no hope of reconciliation, the marriage can be dissolved, but only if the provisions of the Holy Quran and the Sunnah of the Prophet are observed. However, even in this case, Islamic law, which is based on Divine Revelation, showing flexibility and humanity, allows spouses to use the chances of restoring the marital union until the moment the divorce becomes final. It is the inalienable right of every person to take advantage of this flexibility of the Sharia canons. This is the hidden wisdom of the One who established marriage between a man and a woman as part of the earthly world order.

The husband's declaration of intention to divorce his wife (“I gave you a divorce”, “you are divorced”) is the beginning of the divorce proceedings.

The meaning of lengthening the procedure and limiting it to a rigid framework is the need for a comprehensive assessment of the decision made and, in the event of recognition of its haste and erroneousness, the restoration of marital ties.

Having received a divorce (for example, after pronouncing the words "you are divorced", "I divorced you"), a woman can get married only after three menstrual cycles (about three months later), which also show whether she has a pregnancy from former husband or not.

However, there are some nuances:

1. If a husband and wife divorced, so never from the moment of marriage and without having sexual intercourse, then there is no divorce period for this woman (see Holy Koran, 33:49). She can leave, having received only one divorce, after which her ex-husband can return her if she agrees and does not marry another by that time. But if their divorce took place in three stages (all three divorces were announced), then - no longer.

2. For those who do not have menstruation (due to old age or other reasons), the divorce period lasts exactly three months (see).

3. If a woman is pregnant, then the end of the divorce period for her (after receiving one of three divorces from her husband) will be the birth of a child, even if this happens one day after receiving the first, second or third divorce (see).

For all other cases, the divorce period is the expiration of three menstrual cycles.

Divorce quran

“Divorced women wait three menstrual cycles [approximately three months from the date of the divorce]. They are not allowed to hide what is in their womb from the creation of Allah (God, Lord), if they believe in Him and on the Day of Judgment. [If, for example, they are pregnant with a spouse whom they are divorcing, but do not want to advertise this, intending to quickly marry again, then they have no right to do so. Their divorce period ends with the birth of a child.] Husbands have the advantage [they should think carefully and perhaps] return the spouse before the deadline if they wish to [thereby] improve the situation [if both see it as a positive prospect]. [Family] responsibilities are both on husbands to wives and on wives to husbands, and all this is within the framework of morality (morality; in accordance with generally accepted standards of decent behavior and good breeding). [Men are obliged to behave rationally and responsibly, not infringing upon the rights of wives, not abusing their seniority in the family, much less using force.] Husbands are the elders (dominant) in the family. [A wife should respect her husband and honor him, but a spouse, like a head of state, may, using the powers granted to him, turn out to be a tyrant, blinded by power and strength, or maybe a benefactor who feels his responsibility before God and does not lose sight of his own obligations.] Allah (God, Lord) Almighty [any tyrant and oppressor will sooner or later put in place] and infinitely Wise. [All the wisdom of the intertwining of circumstances and the ambiguity of events is initially known only to Him, but people can only assume, setting themselves up in one way or another, draw conclusions (sometimes hasty), while real results often become clear only after years or decades. Therefore, a person must approach what he is doing seriously and attentively, then he will not be saddened either in the worldly or in the eternal.]

There are two divorces [when the integrity of the family can still be preserved]. [The first and second divorces are, as it were, incomplete, but the third is final.] [In the event of an intra-family conflict, having given one or two divorces], the husband [as the head of the family] either keeps his wife within the generally recognized moral standards [without the use of violence and harassment; taking into account the canons, laws and traditions, that is, restores family relations until the expiration of the term], or [preserving both his own dignity and the dignity of a woman] nobly frees her from the bonds of marriage [without interfering with her leaving at the end of the corresponding term]. It is unacceptable for you [husbands] to take back anything [even insignificant] from what you gave (bestowed) to them [your wives earlier], except if there is a mutual fear of violating God's commandments [that is, in the event of an increase in tension, the emergence of conflicts and quarrels when the wife asks, demands to dissolve the marriage and at the same time behaves immorally]. And if you fear a violation of God's commandments [when the internal family situation is heating up, the norms of mutual respect are destroyed and the wife no longer sees the prospect of family happiness and well-being with her husband, for example, she hates him], then there is no sin on both of them if the spouse asks to dissolve the marriage, “having paid off »By something [freeing oneself from family ties and obligations by returning to the husband, in whole or in part, the wedding gift (mahra) that was given to her during (as well as before or after, if its transfer was delayed) of the marriage]. These are the boundaries determined for you by God, do not overstep them! Those who overstep the boundaries [of nobility in behavior and correctness in relationships, especially within the family], those are sinners (oppressors, tyrants).

If the husband divorced his wife [if all three maximum possible divorces in one family are given, which takes more than one month and gives the couple the opportunity to think carefully and weigh everything], then they [now ex-husband and wife] no longer have the right to restore family relationship until she [by his desire and choice] will not marry another. [A woman is not "attached" to her husband, she is not a toy in his hands, and therefore, if the first, second, and third final divorce is given, the canons oblige her relatives and the environment to find another husband suitable for her. They oblige! The one with whom she divorced no longer has any preferential rights to her.] And if it so happens that they will divorce their second husband [after living a full married life with him, but not finding, for example, family happiness and mutual understanding] [ after completing all the divorce procedures], then there is no sin either on her or on the first husband if she [voluntarily] returns to him [after having carried out all the necessary marriage arrangements], when both believe that they have serious intentions before God not to violate boundaries [morality and ethics outlined by] Him. These are God's boundaries [His laws], which He clarifies for people in the know [especially for those who specialize in theology, so that they can advise people on practical family and divorce matters that are of interest to them].

If you divorced your wives [for example, one] and the term comes to an end [before which you can still change your mind with them and save the family, and this is the case when only one or only two divorces are given], then [be determined :] either you [husbands] keep (leave) them with your wives within the framework of generally accepted moral standards [without the use of violence, harassment and by mutual consent], or [preserving your own and their dignity] nobly release them from the bonds of marriage [without stretching the procedures and giving the opportunity to marry another]. And do not in any way hold them back by trying to harm them by lengthening the term [returning them before the due date after the first and second divorces, with no serious intention to save the family]. Whoever [guided by his ego and other ignoble human feelings] does this [from the principle does not give a divorce, stretches the procedure, although everything seems to be decided and there are no prospects of living together], he truly oppresses himself [harms himself business to himself, because sooner or later he will receive what he deserves, God's retribution will overtake him, wherever he is]. The signs of Allah (God, Lord) [to which the lines of the Holy Scriptures also apply] cannot be the subject of ridicule (mockery, mockery, and disdain). [Do not try to treat them like that!] Remember the blessings that Allah (God, the Lord) gave you, the Book sent down to you [the Holy Quran] and the [Divine] wisdom by which you are instructed (edified). Fear Allah (God, Lord) [be afraid to do something sinful, especially when it comes to those who are weaker than you or are under your care, in your care]. Know, He knows every little thing [from the world of people, jinn, angels; from the macro- and microworlds. He even knows what your souls whisper to you].

If you [husbands] divorced your wives [one or two divorce] and the time has come [when the wives can already marry another man, that is, the divorce period has come to an end], then let them [the wife's relatives] do not interfere with the [new] marriage with an ex-husband [who wants to get married, with all the procedures: the wedding and the transfer of an expensive wedding gift (mahra)], if they [already ex-husband and wife, because the divorce period has ended] piously came to a mutual agreement [if they have serious intentions to become all subsequent life loving each other and respecting husband and wife]. These [above] instructions [on the intricacies of the divorce process and mutual respect both during marriage and in the process of its dissolution] will be heeded by those who believe in Allah (God, Lord) and the [inevitability] of the Day of Judgment [that is, those who have enough faith and realizes that even a speck of evil does not go anywhere, but comes back like a boomerang, except for those cases when a person repented before God and corrected himself, thereby making up for the previously violated]. This is the best for you and the purest (gracious) [be mutually polite, respect each other's rights and freedoms both during marriage and during divorce]. Allah (God, the Lord) knows, but you [very much even] do not know ”().

*

“Prophet, if any of you [believers, intends] to get divorced, then let them get divorced on time [do not delay this, creating trouble for the spouse]. Save the term! [Be careful when you divorce your wife, because not every day is suitable for this, only the "clean period" (at the end of menstrual bleeding) is suitable, during which you have not yet had an intimate relationship with your wife. And if between two consecutive divorces there were marital intimate relations, then after the husband's next pronouncement of the wording about the dissolution of the marriage, the divorce period again amounts to three menstrual cycles. Be careful when it (term) ends.] Fear Allah (God) your Lord! [In family relationships and in resolving conflicts, behave wisely and restrained, faithfully and punctually!] Do not expel them [your wives] from their homes, do not leave the house [let them live with you and be provided for by you throughout the divorce period (about three months)], except if they committed an obviously immoral (immoral) act [for example, they cheated on her husband]. These are the boundaries [drawn for you] by God. Whoever transcends God's boundaries [divorces as he pleases and when he pleases, regardless of how it should begin and how it ends], they oppress themselves [in fact, only harm themselves]. You [the person] do not know [how this or that action can turn out], but the Lord can then transform the state of affairs. [Everything is changing rapidly, and therefore you should not rush to destroy family ties, to break - not to build. It is better for everyone to work on themselves, which is always relevant and useful. And if, nevertheless, life together has become unbearable and there is no other way, there is no way out of the current predicament, then, with the blessing of the Lord of the Worlds, a divorce can be an unexpected turn for the better, both for the husband and for the wife].

If the period comes to an end [of three months (three menstrual cycles), on the expiration of which a woman can (1) marry another, or (2) return to her husband again - provided that this was the first or second "unfinished" divorces announced by him, but in this case the marriage is already being re-married and a new valuable wedding gift is given ], then you or return them [your wives ( before expiration of the term - without special procedures, but with witnesses)] in accordance with generally recognized moral standards [that is, with their consent, having the best intentions to overcome the conflict and misunderstanding together], or part with them (leave them) in accordance with generally recognized moral standards [ give them the opportunity to safely leave you and start a new family life, taking from the common and personal property everything that rightfully belongs to your wife. In any case, you must be noble, generous and polite!].

Let there be two just witnesses from among you [when you voice the wording about divorce, which can be no more than three in your entire family life with one person, and also when you directly determine your family perspective closer to the end of the term: do you disperse at the end of the divorce period or restore family relations, taking advantage of the fact that only one or only two divorces have been given]. And let [the witnesses] give [truthful] testimony for the sake of the Most High [if necessary]. Those who believe in God and the Day of Judgment will benefit from all of this.

Who is devout before Allah (God, Lord) [follows the moral norms transmitted through the prophets and developed by the righteous; is obligatory to the best of his ability and ability to fulfill the prescriptions; shuns the obviously forbidden; follows the laws and laws established by the Creator in this universe], the Lord will certainly provide salvation (a way out) [from a seemingly hopeless situation, an insoluble problem, insurmountable trouble, unbearable pain] and will certainly endow (bestow) him with a lot [intellectual, spiritual or material wealth] from where he does not expect it [from where he does not even expect, does not expect to receive it]. He who relies on Allah (God, the Lord) is enough for him. Indeed, He completes (completes) what He wants. He [the Lord of the worlds] has assigned for every thing frame « .

Those of women who already no menstruation (no regulation) either yet yet no, if in doubt, their [divorce] period is three months. The term of pregnant women [the end of their divorce period] is the birth of a child. Those who show trepidation before Allah (God, Lord) [doing the right thing, right, in accordance with the canons and morality], the ease in deeds is certainly given [everything is overcome easily and ends in their favor].

This is God's command given to you. For those who are devout, Allah (God, the Lord) will certainly forgive sins and increase (multiply) reward [as a result of good deeds and fidelity of actions even in such stressful circumstances as divorce, as well as as a result of repentance and correction of mistakes].

Settle [about husbands] their [your wives in a divorce period] in the same place where you yourself live from what is available [taking into account your wealth]. Do not give them trouble (do no harm) [in matters of material security and in the provision of housing], trying to infringe on them (oppress) [so that they run away from you as quickly as possible, without asking for anything and taking nothing of theirs]. If they are pregnant, then provide them financially throughout the entire period of pregnancy until they give birth. If they [the wives you divorced] agree to breastfeed, give them appropriate rewards. Agree with each other in accordance with generally accepted standards. [Do not offend each other and do not overstate requirements; be mutually respectful and generous.] If difficulties arise [in finding a common language and mutual understanding], then the child will be fed by another woman [with whom negotiations will be successful].

Let a person with wealth spend (spend) according to his wealth! [Let him show generosity during the divorce period and not be greedy, and also do not ignore the issue of the subsequent material support of children.] Whoever has a limited lot, let him spend from what God has given him [that is, from what is available]. Allah (God, Lord) does not charge the soul with something that is greater than what is given to it [for temporary, earthly use from strength, means and material wealth]. Some time after the difficulty [which is important to overcome wisely and wisely] He [the Lord of the worlds] gives ease. [Circumstances are variable. If you know how to dispose of little things correctly, you respectfully overcome the difficulties that appear on your way, then God's mercy and generosity will not keep you waiting long, if there is good for you and benefit in a new turn of fate] ”().

Divorce Options Permitted by the Qur'an and Sunnah

People face different life circumstances. In the light of the verses explained above, we present the simplest version of the dissolution of the marriage union. Husband says only one divorce(in a clean period when there was no intimate relationship with his wife), the wife waits for three menstrual cycles without having sex with her husband, and after (after the expiration of the term) she gets the opportunity to marry another man, the relationship with the first comes to a logical end. But in this case, the wife can subsequently get along with the first husband, and even after the end of the divorce period(after all, only one divorce was given, or, for example, only two), if together they decide that they were in a hurry, and seriously intend not to repeat this in the future. Wherein they need will remarry by marrying witnesses and giving his wife a new wedding gift (mahra).

There is another option, when all three formulations on the termination of family life are gradually spelled out. In each of the three pure periods, following one after the other, it is given one divorce; in the third clean period, a third and final divorce is given, after which the spouses become strangers to each other: the wife cannot be returned, except after her full marriage, family life and divorce from another, desired and beloved person. There are three menstrual cycles since the first divorce. Any intimate relationship is unacceptable between divorces during all these months. Accordingly, three divorces have been agreed, and the divorce period for them has come to an end.

Divorce Questions Answered

After the first divorce, the couple decided to renew the marriage. Is there a need for witnesses and guardians during a second nikah (marriage)?

Yes, it is necessary. The conditions remain the same, unchanged.

I will clarify that a second nickname in your situation should be carried out if after the first divorce the divorce period has expired (about three months have passed).

During the three-month divorce period, the husband is responsible for the costs of housing, clothing and food for the wife. Is there any reason why a husband may not provide for his wife for these three months? He makes over $ 3000 though.

Refusal of her material support may take place if the wife's behavior is clearly outside the framework of generally accepted morality and ethics. The Qur'an says:

“Do not drive them [your wives] out of their homes, let them not leave the house [let them live with you and be provided for by you throughout the divorce period (about three months)], unless they have committed an obviously immoral (immoral) act [for example, have changed husband] "(see).

If the spouse's behavior does not go beyond the bounds of morality, then the husband is generously obliged to provide her to the best of his ability. The Qur'an says:

“Let a person with prosperity spend (spend) according to his prosperity! [Let him show generosity during the divorce period and not be greedy, and also not ignore the issue of the subsequent material support of children.] Whoever has a limited lot, let him spend from what God has given him [that is, from what is available] ”(see).

My young man, a Muslim, is starting the process of divorce from his wife, with whom he has not lived for more than six months. I have read many sources on this subject, but I am wondering: should a husband actually live with his wife during the divorce proceedings? Or is it enough to be personally present only when pronouncing the divorce formula? Vera, 25 years old.

In his case, he is not obliged to live with her for the period of the divorce proceedings (since they no longer live together for more than six months). But there is still a serious desirability of this, especially when there is at least a small hope for the restoration of family relations.

It is important to be personally present during the pronouncement of the divorce formula and the presence of two male witnesses.

But I will note: a divorcing spouse must first of all provide his wife with his own housing for a divorce period (“ settle them in the same place where you yourself live from the existing"). He is obliged to provide financial support during these months.

My husband and I are of different nationalities and therefore he decided to give me a divorce. He went to his homeland, called from there and said that I was no longer his wife, that he was divorcing me, and added: "You and I are not on our way." He says that it is enough to say it once, and I am not his wife. But I know that the Quran says about two unfinished and the last final divorce. Do I need to contact him and ask him to say it again in a month, and then again? He will never return to me. He marries a girl of his nationality there. Isla.

A month after the first recitation of the divorce formula, the husband must recite it again, and a month after that, give the third final one. This applies when a husband and wife want to divorce, but still there is indecision in their intentions: whether to keep the marriage or dissolve it. That is, they are given time to think, especially since the divorce is extremely condemnable and it should be initiated only after thinking it over and weighing it. Temporary marriage is prohibited in Islam, and divorce is an extreme measure taken if mutual understanding in the family is completely violated and everyone lives on their own.

In your case, when there is no desire to think about the future and everything has already been decided, you can limit yourself to one divorce, after which, after three menstrual cycles, you have every right to marry another man you want.

My husband and I are divorced through the courts. There is an extract from the court decision on divorce, but there is no divorce mark in the passports. Now we are together again, a baby will be born soon. Is our divorce valid? Do I have to go to sign again or is it not necessary if there is a marriage stamp in the passport? Olga, 28 years old.

If you did not have a completed three-stage Muslim divorce, then you can think about saving the family, considering the divorce under secular legislation to be incomplete. The priority in Islam is precisely in preserving the integrity of family ties, when there is the prospect of kind, warm and respectful relations.

As for the stamp in the passport, it must be valid, and therefore if it is necessary to re-sign for this, then you will have to go to the registry office.

Is it true that divorce in the registry office is tantamount to divorce according to Islam, despite the fact that there was no such intention, and the reason was different? The family continues to live happily in marriage, as before the official divorce. Shamkhan.

It is not true, in this case they (divorce in the registry office and in accordance with the canons of Islam) are not equivalent.

Marrying before God is serious. The intention of the person is important - he was going to get divorced or not.

I divorced my husband six years ago, six years later he got married. I want to get married again, but he just told me "get divorced". And I don't see him at all. Is he my husband today? Leila, 23 years old.

More than three months have passed since he gave you one divorce, and therefore you are divorced and you can safely marry whoever you want.

1. Does a husband have the right to divorce without the presence of his wife, and under what circumstances?

2. If after a divorce the husband threatens his ex-wife with death, is it not a sin according to Islam? Regina.

1. He cannot divorce without her presence, since he does not give a divorce to himself, but to his wife. Divorce according to Islam is not an easy process, not a childish "family game". The husband invites two male witnesses and gives you a divorce in front of them. The Qur'an says:

“Let there be two just witnesses from among you [when you voice the wording of the divorce]” (see).

2. If a husband and wife divorced, then she is a stranger to him and he has no right to visit her. He also has no right to prohibit marrying someone else. If your ex-husband prevents you from living in peace, then you can protect yourself from his interference and harassment by all legal means, up to legal or criminal prosecution.

If a husband drinks, walks and his wife has not lived with him for about a year, is she his legal wife? If they want to get back together again, do you need to re-conduct the nikah (marriage)? Venus.

If the words of divorce were not spoken, then she is his legal wife, no matter how long they do not live together. Prolonged separation does not dissolve the marriage, and therefore there is no need for a new nickname.

It is better not to leave a situation like yours in uncertainty, but to find the most optimal solution to get out of it.

One of my best friends got married a year ago. They are of different nationalities, but both are Muslim. In the process of their life together, they had a wonderful daughter, but the attitude of the husband to his wife left much to be desired (he often beat her). She did not tell anyone what was going on in their family, she thought everything would be settled, but she could not resist and left him with the child. Did she do the right thing from the point of view of Islam? Ch.

If the husband beats and oppresses, then the wife, of course, has every right to leave him, demanding at least one divorce or carrying out this procedure through the courts, government agencies, for example, the registry office, by filing an application for divorce.

I've been divorced for three months now, and I returned home. True, my husband did not give me a divorce, as it should be. I went to Ramadan, and I was also pregnant, because it was simply impossible to live together. My husband (already a former) made me a condition: if I do not return home, then we are divorced. And I didn’t come back. Then he said that everything was over between us, and left me with the child.

From the first day, my pregnancy was difficult, the doctors said that it would be better to have an abortion, otherwise the child and I could suffer, but I did not agree, I decided to save it with all my might. When my husband told me that I could take my things, I was still pregnant. My family took my things, and my mother-in-law, when she gave things away, cursed me! A month later, I lost my child.

I wanted to ask: 1) should my husband have given me a divorce as it should be (he still has not come with witnesses and has not left me); 2) whether he had the right to divorce me during pregnancy; 3) no one has cursed me in my life before, will these curses reach me? 4) And the last question: he brought his first wife a week ago without leaving me, is that correct? Zhania, Kazakhstan.

1. He should come with witnesses and give you at least one divorce.

2. Yes, canonically it is possible, but from the point of view of Muslim morality it is extremely condemnable and frivolous. Such actions indicate a low level of awareness of responsibility before God.

3. Do not think about it, and the curses voiced by her will bypass you.

4. So what? Your life goes on, and therefore forget about it. All the good things are ahead of you, if you skillfully close this page of life, gaining experience and worldly wisdom.

My husband and I have been married for a long time and loved each other very much. I continue to love him, he was the only one and remains so to this day. But it turned out that his parents insisted on a divorce. He did not want to divorce me, we decided that he would give a divorce, but without the intention of being left alone. His parents sent their man as a witness to tell me in front of him that I was divorced. The first time he told me this, then we continued to live as husband and wife. The second time, a month later, again with the same witness, he told me this. But he stopped coming and touching me. To my questions: “What’s wrong with you, maybe you’re deceiving me and getting divorced in reality?”, He replied that he didn’t, that he loved me very much, he was just psychologically in a difficult state, because he had to deceive his parents. Naturally, I understood and supported him. A month later, he told me that I was divorced for the third time. In the end, I got tired of all this and I said that I couldn't do this anymore, so that he would give me a real divorce, and he answered me: “I have already told you three times that you are divorced, so be it.”

I do not know whether I am divorced or not, I still continue to love him, but I am afraid that the past cannot be returned, he was quickly married. And now everything is, I hope, all right with him. A good guy is wooing me now, my beloved husband does not know about it. Perhaps, if he finds out, he will take some measures, but I don’t know whether to answer that guy “yes” or “no”. Am I a wife, am I loved, does my husband want me back? I'm completely confused. L.

You are divorced. Forget about your ex-husband, and forever. Root out all feelings for him and throw them out of the heart and soul. Try to understand and understand: it no longer exists in your personal life.

If, after the divorce formula that was said for the second time, before which you had an intimate relationship, as far as can be understood from the letter, three months have passed and there were no more such relationships, then you can safely marry another person.

People around you often greatly change a person's train of thought, even if at first he does not want to take them seriously. In addition, those to whom we have positive feelings, sometimes, due to various reasons and circumstances, are not able to share them, and for the believer there is another chance for the depth of these feelings to fill his soul vessel with the fragrant life-giving water of faith, which gives us the strength to walk to achieve new goals and objectives that have appeared before us. Vitality and happiness to you! Life doesn't stop and you don't stop.

Could the following situation be a reason for divorce: my parents told me that I had to leave for my homeland, and my wife did not want to go under any circumstances, but I could not refuse my parents. Can I sacrifice my marital relationship for my parents?

Why get divorced right away ?! Due to some temporary issue, do you immediately start thinking about divorce? You have become a family, and this is for life. Decent people do not so easily throw off their duties and responsibilities. Find a temporary compromise. Pray to the Almighty to help you maintain obedience to your parents and the integrity of your family. Be a subtle and wise diplomat, preserving and developing, not destructive.

My husband gave me a divorce by sending an SMS to my mobile, where he wrote three times: "You are not my wife!" Does this count as a divorce?

If the husband wrote “talak” three times during a fight in WhatsApp correspondence, is it considered that the nicknames have already been terminated, that they are divorced?

It's hard to say for sure. Divorce is not a joke on the phone, but a very serious and responsible step. It is difficult for me to understand your husband, his actions resemble the behavior of a person who is not yet fifteen years old. A serious, prudent man would not behave this way in such a responsible matter.

If his intention to divorce actually takes place, if he directly to you (in front of witnesses) says “you are divorced” and does it (in accordance with the Sunnah of the Prophet) first once, after a month - the second, and the next - the third, then your marriage union will definitely be terminated. Or he can give you one divorce, after which a divorce period (three menstrual cycles) will pass, after which you can already marry another.

What if I want to divorce my wife, but I am not able to pay her the full amount of the mahr? And what to do if, for example, the wife refuses the mahr?

If it is you who are the initiator of the divorce, then you have the obligation to pay the mahr promised at the time of marriage (a free wedding gift). And if not immediately, then gradually. Write an IOU with a commitment to pay a specific monthly amount over a specified period.

The husband of a Muslim woman told her that he wanted to get a divorce. Before doing this, there were some issues to be sorted out. When everything was settled and the very moment of divorce came, he did not utter the word "you are divorced" in front of witnesses, as it should be, although his wife insisted on saying them. These people have been living separately from each other for two years. Are they considered divorced? Or does he still need to say the words about divorce in front of witnesses?

He needs to pronounce the words of divorce in front of witnesses.

The fact that they have been living separately for two years does not affect the marriage in any way. Yes, the wife has every right to file for divorce. But the husband, leaving his wife in such a limbo, commits a clear sin. If they decide to divorce, then divorce is his direct duty before God.

People, unfortunately, quickly forget the good, and besides, they are stingy not only on disinterested accomplishment of a good deed, but even on a couple of words that must be uttered in view of the obligations undertaken earlier. The Qur'an says:

“[Note that] there is a lot of avarice (greed) in people's souls [people, for example, do not like to listen to an interlocutor who is unpleasant for them at the moment, not to mention giving in to him, respecting him, loving him]. If you do good [know how to transform evil and hysterical feelings into kindness to each other and politeness; you try to transfer destructive energy into a creative channel] and you are afraid of God [to act dishonestly, rudely, especially towards those who are in your care and under your care], truly, Allah (God, Lord) knows all your deeds [for the good He will reward you with the corresponding good in the worldly and in the eternal, and for evil and irresponsibility - with what you deserve. Do not forget, everything will return to you the same] ”(see).

During a divorce from her husband, when the three-month period has not yet expired, how should a woman behave? Can you communicate with your husband, can he visit her, can you walk without a headscarf in front of him?

Until the divorce period expires, everything can remain the same, except for admiring his wife and intimate relationships. This period she lives with her husband and is fully provided for by him. They can still restore family relations by inviting two witnesses and voicing their intentions in front of them. If the divorce period of the first or second divorces has expired, or the third divorce has already been given, then the divorced become strangers to each other, and therefore there can be no visits or exposure ‘aurata.

Please explain the following points regarding divorce:

1. How does the “return” of a wife by her husband take place if she does not want to return?

2. When a husband says to his wife “I’m divorcing you” once, is he then obliged to say “I’m divorcing you” a second time, or will his silence be a confirmation that he is getting a divorce a second time?

1. If the wife does not want to, then she may not come back. There is no compulsion in Islam.

2. He must say it in front of witnesses, if he wishes.

I converted to Islam about two months ago, before that I was an Orthodox Christian. He was married, my wife and I have a child, a two-year-old daughter. I divorced my wife five months ago (she is also Orthodox). About a month after that, I began dating another girl and had an affinity with her. A little later I became interested in Islam, read books, looked for information. I realized that Islam is the religion that is close to me, and I accepted it. After that, for several months I continued to meet with that girl, although I realized that I was committing adultery. Then I repented of what I had done and broke up with her. But she is pregnant by me, she wants to have an abortion. I agree with her decision, although it is very difficult. I do not like this girl and do not want to start a family with her.

I still only love my ex-wife. Our relationship with her has improved lately. She said that she also still loves me, but she could not forgive, because as a result of the excitement caused by our separation, she had a miscarriage, and she could have a second child, but I did not even know about it. She says she wants to rebuild her family. I also do not imagine another woman next to me, besides her. My ex-wife and I want to be together and raise a daughter.

I read that I can only marry her again after she marries another man and he gives her a divorce. Is this so in my situation, because when we parted, I was not yet a Muslim. How can I do now to get her back? V., 24 years old.

Since you were not yet a Muslim during the divorce period, Muslim canons did not apply to you, and you also did not have a full-fledged three-stage divorce.

Having repented of your sins (cohabitation, abortion, hassle), take measures (working on yourself and at least changing something in yourself, in life) so that with a "good" opportunity you do not repeat them again.

I doubt the reality of nikah. On the side of the bride, that is, on my side, there was one girl, on the side of the husband - two men and a mullah. Nikah read the mullah in a separate room. First with my husband, then with me. The husband gave a token amount as a mahr. A month later, my husband decided to divorce me, I left for my city, he does not provide for me. Now I have met a good Muslim and he wants to marry me. Do I have to wait three months? And what to do in this situation? Anisa.

If there was an intimacy with your husband, then you need to wait three months from the moment he gave you a divorce. Prepare for a new marriage, for example, by considering a prenuptial agreement based on previous experiences. Three months will fly by quickly, and they will also confirm the seriousness of the new applicant's intentions.

My wife and I broke up seven months ago. The divorce proceedings have not yet been completed. We have no children. The marriage was registered at the registry office at one time, they did not enter into nicknames. After parting, I began to perform namaz, I try to be a correct Muslim. Recently I met a Muslim girl, we want to marry her according to Sharia, read the nicknames. Can I do this without waiting for the completion of my divorce proceedings? Indeed, in my case, there was no nikah. And can the girl I want to marry be considered my true first wife under Sharia law (this is very important for her)? Bolat, 25 years old. Kazakhstan.

You can get married. The first is the one that was the first. Bring the divorce proceedings with her to the end (officially, according to the documents). Register the marriage with the second, including in the registry office.

I personally advise you: fewer theological terms, more good behavior in real life, responsibility before God and constancy in the path you have chosen (self-improvement, religious practice, career, family, etc.).

I am 25 years old, I work as a district police officer. Five years ago I met my future wife. Having made friends for some time, we parted on my initiative, since I was not ready for a serious relationship, I was young (20 years old), I was in my first year at the institute. For four years we did not communicate, all this time she continued to love me, thought only of me, was ill with me. My lifestyle is very rich: I have been involved in sports since childhood, I have many friends who respect me, who do not drink, do not smoke, are just as active. After graduation, I accidentally met my future wife, after which my thoughts were only about her, which is unnatural for me. Usually I always think with reason, not feelings. Perhaps it was even a love spell, I once saw her book on magic.

During the meetings, she was friendly, modest, showed respect for my parents. After the wedding, everything changed - she became irritable, embittered, forbidding me to go to training, meet friends, jealous of me for everything, although I do not give a reason. In order to maintain a normal climate in the family, I stopped going to trainings and rarely saw my friends. Before the month of Ramadan, I began to perform namaz, kept my uraz, was glad of it, shared my joy with my wife, but met with misunderstanding. She herself is a Christian. On the holiday of Eid al-Adha there was a conflict that was brewing from the very beginning of family life. She thinks I’m abnormal, she says that she married a normal person, not a religious one. My mother recently started namaz, she is very friendly to her wife, she is always ready to help, while she does not climb into our family life. The wife, on the other hand, greets her mother unfriendly, speaks coldly, may not answer my mother’s question. It is unpleasant and painful for me. After the conflict, I believe that we will not have a normal family life, it will bring only suffering. My wife threatened to divorce, for which I, inwardly, may be ready.

Was this given to me by the Almighty as a test and should I endure or can I get a divorce, although I know that it is not welcomed by the Almighty? Every day after namaz, I pray to the Almighty for my wife to take the true path.

We have a daughter. The wife insists that we will not have more children, she does not want to. And I want a big friendly family. A., 25 years old.

You and your wife have completely different life orientations, and therefore you should not expect good prospects. Follow the logic of your mind and listen to your healthy heart. Don't overcomplicate the situation. Parents and friends are important people in our life, to give up for the sake of a woman who does not want to have more than one child, I do not think is rational.

My brother is in trouble. His wife left him two months ago. They have been married for twelve years, they have two minor children. On the eve of leaving, she asked for a divorce due to the fact that she no longer loves him. He refused, saying that this was not a reason for divorce in Islam and that he loved her and the children. However, she forced him to divorce, saying that if he did not, she would commit a sin. He gave a one-time divorce. While waiting, he learned that his wife had repeatedly committed adultery with the man. Her husband forgave her and wants to return her. But despite this, she took the children and went to that man. During these two months, she constantly came to her husband's home, wrote sms, talking about mental anxiety, anxiety and sadness. Now she regrets what happened, regrets and wants to go back to her husband. However, it turned out that she was pregnant with that man. The term is about a week.

1. Is she still his wife, because he returned her?

2. Does she need to marry the person with whom she became pregnant (he and his family are non-Muslims)?

3. Can she have an abortion to return to her husband?

What should they do in this situation? She wants to return, but pregnancy stops her. Recently, her husband made her an offer to accept her, even with someone else's child, if she repents and takes a straight path. He still loves her and the children, and the children love him very much and are drawn to their father. As a brother, I cannot see from the outside how he suffers. Dmitriy.

Yes, he can forgive her and return, if they did not have a final divorce.

“And from His signs [indicating the power and might of God], He created from yourself [from the same quintessence] a pair for you [for men - women, for women - men]. [Having a couple] gives you the opportunity to rest (calm down). He has established feelings of love and mercy between you [between the sexes] [especially when it comes to family ties and marital relationships]. Indeed, in this there are signs for people thinking (contemplating) ”(Holy Quran, 30:21).

According to the Old Testament, divorce is a sin that contradicts the Divine plan of marriage as an eternal union that lasts all human life. “I hate divorce,” says the Lord, the God of Israel. “And I hate people who cover themselves with violence like clothes” (Mal. 2:17; explanatory translation of the Hebrew text). Divorce was permissible only because of human cruelty. The New Testament reaffirms the ideal of eternal union in marital relations: “What God has united, let not man separate” (Mark 10: 9; Matthew 19: 6). But, according to the New Testament tradition, Jesus allowed divorce only in the case of adultery: “I tell you: whoever divorces his wife not for adultery and marries another commits adultery; and he who marries a divorced woman commits adultery ”(Matthew 19: 9). The Apostle Paul allowed divorce in mixed marriages when one of the spouses is an unbeliever and does not accept the marriage bond.

Hadith from Ibn 'Umar; St. NS. Abu Dawud, Ibn Maj and al-Hakim. See, for example: as-Suyuty J. Al-Jami ‘as-sagyr. P. 10, hadith no. 53, sahih; Abu Daud S. Sunan abi daud [The Hadith Code of Abu Daud]. Riyadh: al-Afkar ad-dawliya, 1999. P. 248, hadith no. 2178; Ibn Majah M. Sunan [Collection of Hadiths]. Riyadh: al-Afkar ad-dawliyya, 1999, p. 219, hadith no. 2018.

Hadith from Abu Hurayrah; St. NS. Muslim. See: al-Naisaburi M. Sahih Muslim [Code of Hadiths of Imam Muslim]. Riyadh: al-Afkar ad-dawliya, 1998. P. 586, hadith no. 61– (1469).

Until the end of the divorce period, the inheritance rights of the spouses remain.

For canonical details see, for example: as-Sabuni M. Mukhtasar tafsir ibn kasir. T. 1.P. 202; al-Qurtubi M. Al-Jami ‘li ahkyam al-qur’an [Code of the Qur'an]. In 20 volumes. Beirut: al-Qutub al-‘ilmiya, 1988. T. 3. P. 75–78.

If only one or only two divorces are given.

Both husband and wife have certain responsibilities to each other, as well as to God and society, which should be based on a sense of responsibility, have harmony and not be presented as a categorical requirement of one to another.

See, for example: as-Sabuni M. Mukhtasar tafsir ibn kasir. T. 1.P. 205.

This is in cases where there is no harassment, infidelity or non-fulfillment of marital duties on the part of the husband. If something of the above takes place and this is what forces a woman to ask for a divorce, then the husband has neither the moral nor the canonical right to take from her anything from the previously transferred, but is obliged to respond to her request for a divorce free of charge, repenting in sins and immoral behavior. See, for example: as-Sabuni M. Mukhtasar tafsir ibn kasir. T. 1.P. 205.

The procedure can be extended by returning the wife back a day or two before the end of the divorce period, having entered into an intimate relationship with her, and then initiating a second divorce and waiting for the end of the next period. At the end of the divorce period, the husband again enters into an intimate relationship with his wife and thereby returns her to the bosom of the family. After, after some time, for example, he gives a third divorce, before which they had an intimate relationship, and forces her to wait three more menstrual cycles, which in total can last more than 9 months, about a year, and possibly more. Such actions are forbidden in Islam - haram.

« Giving the opportunity to marry someone else ", that is, bringing the divorce period to a logical end from the first time, with the first divorce, and thus summing up family life. After the expiry of the divorce period, a woman has the right to marry what she wants, and the restoration of family relations with her first husband (if one or only two divorces were given) is possible (without marrying another) only through a new full-fledged marriage with the transfer of an expensive wedding gift (makhra) ...

For more details, see the beginning of the 65th chapter of the Holy Quran.

See: Holy Quran, 50:16.

Let me remind you that divorce in Islam is allowed as a last resort when there are no other forms of resolution of intra-family tension.

Admiration and any intimate relationships during the entire divorce period are prohibited.

The presence of witnesses is a canonically desirable action according to the scholars of all four madhhabs, although the verse uses the imperative mood, and therefore it is extremely important. See, for example: al-Zuhayli V. At-tafsir al-Munir. T. 14.P. 649, 661; al-Qardawi Y. Fatawa mu''asyr [Modern fatwas]: In 3 volumes. Kuwait: al-Kalyam, 2001. T. 3. P. 348.

Frame (Arabic) - definiteness, limitation of each thing (situation, difficulty) by place, quantity, size, time, etc. Therefore, troubles are not endless, if we are not afraid, do not give in to them, but walk confidently and wisely overcome their.

Compare: “Everything with Him [the Lord of the worlds] (in His universe) is clear and definite [has given quantitative and qualitative characteristics]” (see Holy Quran, 13: 8).

After all, the father, even if he divorced his wife, the mother of the child, is obliged to the best of his ability and ability to bear all the costs associated with his daughter or son. Even breastfeeding is not the responsibility of an ex-wife. Responsibility before God for breastfeeding of the child rests with the ex-husband, who remains a full-fledged father. But raising a child and taking care of him, custody is the mother's duty. See, for example: al-Zuhayli V. At-tafsir al-Munir. T. 14.P. 671, 675, 677.

See, for example: Mu''jamu lugati al-fuqaha '[Glossary of Theological Terms]. Beirut: al-Nafais, 1988.S. 292; al-Zuhayli V. At-tafsir al-Munir. In 17 t. T. 14. S. 657, 658; al-Qurtubi M. Al-Jami ‘li ahkyam al-qur’an. T. 18.P. 100.

Words about divorce are spoken by a husband to his wife in front of witnesses on days when she has a "clean period", from the beginning of which they have not had an intimate relationship.

For canonical details see, for example: al-Zuhaili V. At-tafsir al-Munir. In 17 volumes.Vol. 1.P. 697, 698.

Married - wept, divorced - had fun

Psychologists advise celebrating the divorce with a party. Strange trends: divorce is not considered a reason for tears, but an excellent excuse for a daring party. This is exactly what the former spouses from Dnepropetrovsk Aleksey and Angela Nadion did. Having lived together for only a year, the students decided to leave, but they do not experience any particular grief about this. And the employees of the registry office, who provided the official part of the divorce ceremony, are still smiling, remembering the cheerful couple.

As the ex-spouses themselves say, a divorce is essentially the same wedding, just the opposite. Therefore, a week before the dissolution of the marriage, they ordered a ceremonial registration hall at the registry office. Employees of the registry office almost twisted their fingers to their temples, but in the end they also liked everything.

Everything was as it should be at the wedding: witnesses, guests, parents, musicians, a bunch of guests. Only the bridal bouquet was wrapped in newspaper, and the cortege was decorated with toilet paper. Instead of bread and salt, those present were treated to beer, and the ex-spouse, when leaving the registry office, was showered not with wheat, but with dumplings.

On the bridge of lovers, the former spouses, with a meeting of guests, solemnly cut down the castle, which symbolized the strength of their union a year ago, broke the service that was presented to them for the wedding, and burned the traditional symbol of love - a red plush heart. After that, the guys said that such a funny divorce should become a new good tradition.

Down and Out trouble started

Oddly enough, they found followers. In Blagoveshchensk, one of the holiday agencies is already offering "the organization and conduct of the divorce proceedings." Such pleasure is not cheap - about 7-8 thousand rubles for the most modest scenario. If you carefully study the price list of "divorce" services, you will be convinced: a different divorce will cost more than a wedding. It is understandable: scenarios for a wedding celebration are a dime a dozen, but in order to celebrate a divorce in a human way ... This is still tight, you have to come up with everything yourself. In Blagoveshchensk, the process is led by a presenter who delivers heartfelt and cheerful speeches. The rest is at the discretion of the customers. Agency employees insist that such a divorce will allow people to part humanly and remain friends, and remember the procedure itself as something funny and curious.

By the way, one married couple has already used the services of this agency and celebrated their separation with glitz and glamor. They say that both the ex-husband and the ex-wife were satisfied.

The opinion of psychologists

By the way, psychologists very much approve of new trends. Women and men react differently to such an event in their lives. Men perceive divorce as the end of one stage of life and the transition to a new life. Usually they pretty soon have either a new mistress or a new wife, they have children. Another option is that the man perceives the divorce as his defeat, especially if his spouse becomes the initiator.

For a woman, divorce is usually a tragedy. Starting a new life with children is much more difficult for her. Therefore, psychologists advise to celebrate this event at least with close friends. The divorce party for a woman, they argue, is primarily therapeutic. After such therapy, it is easier to believe that divorce is not the end, but only the beginning of a new stage of life, which will be better and happier.

Naturally, no one is going to sing the praises of a family breakdown. But the drama of the situation can be smoothed out by organizing at least a semblance of a celebration. Moreover, some time passes between divorce as a fact and its legalization, during which divorced spouses are already starting or preparing to start new relationships. Having finished his unsuccessful family life with a party, a person seems to say to himself: "Life begins anew!"

And how are they?

Perhaps the fashion for "wedge" parties came to us from Western Sahara, where a woman organizes a holiday on this occasion, inviting her friends and potential applicants for her hand and heart. Guests present the "divorce" with incense and money.

But the first among the "civilized" peoples to celebrate their divorces were American women... Thus, they celebrate their new status - a free and independent woman. Indispensable attributes of such a holiday are dishes with "adjustable" pictures, tea that helps to forget the ex-spouse, a collection of music appropriate to the moment and a set of Voodoo love magic - a cute cloth doll and a long pin. A pin can be poked into all comfortable and uncomfortable doll places and at least in this way take revenge on the hated former half. The ceremonial lowering of wedding rings in the toilet and shooting at the target with a photograph of "this bastard" is also practiced.

The French the divorce is celebrated in an expensive restaurant or a trendy disco, where the DJ sets the tone. Sushi, champagne and giant cake included. The cultural program is provided by strippers, fakirs and fortune-tellers.

In Argentina couples after divorce usually dance passionate tango.

In Great Britain people, in addition to parties, also order an intensive rehabilitation course in order to regain faith in themselves and start a new life. And the special cakes become the highlight of the parties. The first was to prepare them for the divorcing pastry chef Fay Miller - so she decided to cheer herself up after breaking up with her husband. As Miller herself says, the main thing in these cakes is the customers' imagination and sense of humor. But in any case, sugar figurines of ex-husband and wife must be placed on the cake. And the cake itself is some kind of scene from family life, which became a pretext or reason for divorce, but, of course, with a humorous bias. Here there will be a place for packed suitcases, and even for guns and knives that rush after the leaving half. Popular is the image of a woman clinging with all her strength to a man, who at this moment pushes her away with his foot. The cake is called "Finally Free." If the customer is an ex-wife, then the woman stands at the top of a three-tiered cake and pushes her ex-spouse off of it. Most often, clients order such inscriptions: "I am free", "I got my life back" and "Got rid of the old man." Broken wedding bells and fallen wedding rings are also common on baked goods. The cost of "adjustable" cakes is from $ 100 to $ 1,300.

Divorced Germans they also adore baked goods, only they order not cakes, but pies with special portraits of the ex-spouse. Such edible portraits were launched by the Berlin baker Georgius Vasseliu. They cost 30-100 euros. According to Vasseliu, the idea of ​​such cakes came to him after one of the customers asked for something to celebrate the divorce. “People get divorced all the time, so it makes sense to sweeten this bitter pill for them,” the baker said.

In Warsaw draw parties are held with music, dancing, striptease and toasts to a new life. Orders from companies organizing such celebrations - a quarter ahead. As a rule, such an action is arranged by young people who have lived together for a year or two and have not been married in a church. Moreover, the majority of customers are women over 30 years of age with children.

The ritual is as follows. A cake is required, only cut it separately. On top of the cake is a chocolate figurine of a husband or wife, which must be cut off with a special "machete". Then you have to break the "handcuffs", testifying that freedom has come. After that, the hostess of the evening burns photos of the "ex-spouse", marriage certificate and other souvenirs that remained after the "happy life". For men, parties are reminiscent of a bachelor party: girls, striptease, a sea of ​​booze - walk, people, I'm finally my own master!

By the way, in Poland there are also "wedge" restaurants where ex-spouses can visit. They kindly offer "soup for mother-in-law (mother-in-law) from mushrooms of unknown origin" (porcini mushroom soup), "lover's breast" (brisket), "diluted" vodka with a label depicting a former wife.

China also keeps pace with the times. On Valentine's Day, February 14, 2006, the Divorced Club was inaugurated in Shanghai. The goal is to help divorced people celebrate the end of their marriage. The club already has over 100 members. For them, consultations are provided, including lawyers, and social events called get-togethers are organized. In addition, divorced people celebrate in the club the final break of the marriage bond.

“As a matter of fact, it is a happy excuse to get rid of a practically dead marriage, which is why we chose Valentine's Day to officially open our club,” says its head, Ms. Shu Xin.

“And they lived happily ever after” ... This is how the stories of not all married couples end. And representatives of blue bloods sometimes have a hard time, because their marriages are often built for financially beneficial reasons. And what happens, the powerful of this world are not destined to know happiness in marriage?
Princely family of Monaco- the owner of one of the most intriguing stories. Failures in love affairs have been haunting the owners of the surname for more than 700 years. Grimaldi... Each new royal wedding gives hope to superstitious Monegasques for a happy future for the newlyweds, and the press closely monitors their every step.
According to legend, in 1297, Francesco Grimaldi and his soldiers, disguised as monks, tricked into the castle, killing the guards and opening the gates to their soldiers. Again, no one can reliably assert, but legend says that Francesco Grimaldi fell into madness, fanatically destroying heretics and witches. Even his favorite could not escape suspicion of witchcraft. Dying at the stake, she threw in Francesco's face: "Never a single Grimaldi will be happy in love, and if someone loves him, then they will not see family happiness." According to another version, Grimaldi dishonored a noble lady. The offended and humiliated city woman turned out to be a witch and cursed the rapist: "None of the Grimaldi can know happiness in marriage!"
We can only guess what actually happened in those distant times, but after tracing the history of the Grimaldi family, you involuntarily become superstitious - it is replete with betrayals, tragic events, quarrels and divorces.

Prince Louis I of Monaco was left by his wife Catherine-Charlotte. The French aristocrat, accustomed to the brilliance of Versailles, got bored in the provincial principality and fled, becoming one of the favorites of King Louis XIV of France.

Princess Catherine-Charlotte
traded the prince of Monaco for a king

Since then, the list of cuckold husbands has only increased: Maria of Lorraine, the wife of Prince Antoine I of Monaco, was unfaithful to her husband, Catherine de Brignoles, the wife of Prince Honore III, preferred her husband to Prince Conde. Honore IV, the eldest son of Honore III, survived three arrests - one during the French Revolution as heir to the throne of Monaco, and was arrested twice under Napoleon, and in his married life with Louise d'Aumont Mazarin suffered a fiasco - the couple lived together for 11 years and separated ... The family curse also affected Charles III, whose wife, Princess Antoinette, died young.
Prince Albert I, an outstanding scientist and navigator, was plagued by setbacks in his personal life. In 1869, 20-year-old Albert married Maria-Victoria Hamilton, but their marriage ended in separation 11 years later. 9 years later - in 1889, 40-year-old Prince Albert married a second time to the widow Alice Richelieu, whom he was fascinated at first sight. Princess Alice patronized art, thanks to her efforts, the Monte Carlo theater became popular in Europe. But 13 years have passed, and the loving couple broke up with the scandal. Albert in the theater, in front of high society, accused his wife of treason and slapped her in the face.

Half a century later, on September 13, 1982, the princely family of Monaco was once again shocked by grief: the car driven by Princess Grace collapsed into the abyss at one of the bends of the road leading to the summer residence of the monarchs. As expected, there was no end in sight to the car crash hype. The interest of the press was fueled by new details and versions of what happened from time to time. According to rumors, at the time of the accident, Grace's youngest daughter, 17-year-old Stephanie, was driving. Only 20 years later, the princess found the strength to refute this version. The official cause of the death of Princess Grace was a ruptured cerebral vessel, as a result of which she lost control of the Rover.

Princess Grace and Prince Rainier III

Grace's spouse, Prince Rainier III, never married again, never resigned to the loss of his blonde beauty, his wife. In 2005, he was buried next to Grace in the Grimaldi family crypt. This marriage, which lasted 26 years, deserves to be called happy. But this time too, the curse turned out to be stronger than love.
Continuing the theme of unhappy marriages, it is worth dwelling on the representative of the current generation of Grimaldi - Princess Stephanie. In 1995, the girl married her bodyguard Daniel Ducre, giving him two children. A year later, the newly-made owner of the Grimaldi surname was bored with the royal life: he preferred the arms of a young beauty to his wife, who had by that time won the glorious title of Miss Naked Breasts of Belgium. However, Princess Stephanie did not despair and in September 2003, after the birth of her third child, she married a circus acrobat from Portugal. But this marriage also lasted a little over a year.

Princess Caroline, sister of the current sovereign of Monaco, was no more fortunate in love than her younger sister Stephanie. In 1978 - at that time she was 21 years old - Caroline married 38-year-old Parisian banker Philippe Junot. However, the couple divorced after two years of family life - Philip turned out to be a reveler and a playboy. But it was only in 1992 that the Roman Catholic Church officially annulled this marriage.

In 1983, unable to resist the charm of the Italian industrialist Stefano Casiraghi, Carolina again went down the aisle. After seven happy years of family life, the curse of the Grimaldi again overtook the princely family: Stefano, a fan of fast driving, died during a boat race in 1990.
Now Caroline is married to Prince Ernst Augustus V of Hanover. However, the spouses live far away from each other. Carolina occasionally comes to Monaco, where her 13-year-old daughter Alexandra lives.

Andrea Casiraghi with Tatiana Santo Domingo

After a series of failures in the life of Carolina, joyful days have come. Her eldest son Andrea and his wife Tatiana Santo Domingo, after eight years of marriage, gave her a grandson. And Caroline's youngest daughter, Charlotte, is often compared to Grace: the girl could confidently become a style icon, but she chose family life with French comedian Gad Elmaleh, charity and horseback riding. Looking at the happy couple, one would like to hope that the curse of the Grimaldi family is a fiction.

Another hope of the Monegasques is the marriage of Pierre Kazeragi with a representative of the ancient Italian aristocratic family - Beatrice Borromeo, which took place in August this year. The classic equal marriage between representatives of blue blood is not like a misalliance.

The current ruler of Monaco, His Serene Highness Prince Albert II, was in no hurry to tie the knot and enjoyed life in the literal sense of the king. The ruler of Monaco was credited with having affairs with Sharon Stone, Gwyneth Paltrow, Naomi Campbell, Claudia Schiffer and many other beauties. However, in 2011, to the delight of the Monegasques, the prince chose a life partner - the new princess of Monaco, and also a professional swimmer from South Africa, Charlene Wittstock. The Monegasque hopes for a happy marriage of the couple and deliverance from the unfortunate curse of the princely family of Monaco almost collapsed even before the wedding ceremony, when the future princess tried to escape to South Africa. However, the wedding took place, and in 2014 Charlene became the mother of twins - Jacques and Gabriella. Perhaps the appearance of children will strengthen the marriage of the royal couple and put an end to a series of family tragedies and love failures of the rulers of Monaco.
Legends are legends, but flipping through one page after another of the love failures of the Grimaldi family, personalities less prone to superstition ask themselves the question: is the curse of the Flemish witch real or is it a payment for willfulness in choosing life companions?

Prince Albert II and Princess Charlene