Sometimes you just need support... How and with what words to calm a person and provide him with “fast” moral help? How to cheer up a person: simple secrets of a good relationship

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The girl is upset. Any guy who has the privilege of dating a beautiful creature knows firsthand what kind of task it is with a n number of unknown reasons for frustration.

And they will be right. Sometimes a lady throws out such tricks that the honorary employees of Harvard throw up their hands in amazement. However, the young lady is different. Many women do get upset often and for no apparent reason.

And the fact is that girls attach much more importance to trifles than men. Therefore, the likelihood of a cause of bad mood, sadness and tears is much higher for them.

As Gabrielle Chanel said, a man who is capable of action is doomed to be loved. Climbing up to the sky for a star, perhaps, would be an overkill. However, the ability to calm and cheer up a woman is priceless.

Just think, now she is a young creature, in twenty years she is a mature woman, a wife, at work you probably have many female colleagues. And also mom, sister ... Knowing the approach to a woman's heart, you will win the jackpot! In addition, what man does not dream of being a hero in the grateful eyes of a young lady.

Try to determine the cause

Yes, try. No one guarantees that you will find it. After all, often the girl herself does not fully understand why she is offended.

  • Let her know you want to know why. “Honey, I see your eyes are sad. What happened? Did someone hurt you?"
  • “Darling, I feel that something is wrong with your mood. Maybe it's me?"

Be prepared for the fact that the young lady does not admit the real reason for her sadness. A bad mood will be attributed to well-being or the weather.

  • In this case, say that you are willing to wait, and then offer to help: “It's okay, I understand. All people get sad sometimes. If you want to talk, I'm always ready to listen to you. You have a magical smile, I would really like to return it.

When asking for help, be sincere.

Offer your strong leverage only if you are really ready to provide it. At such moments, empty promises can be detrimental to relationships.

Give a chance to speak

We understand that listening to women's tears is not for the faint of heart. And, if instead of Tanya, Mani, Angelica, she will carry out an intensive exchange of emotions with you, you may think that you will not be able to stand it, you will be exhausted and die young.

But here you need secular patience. In general, if a girl is ready to talk about a sore point, it means that she trusts you and agrees to make contact. Therefore, give her attention and the luxury of being heard.

Don't argue if you disagree with something. Your job is to listen, not give advice. Believe me, by showing unlimited patience and sympathy, you will automatically gain her favor.

Hug a woman

Hugs should be used in any case. However, their nature directly depends on the type of your relationship. Yes, if you are in a relationship, hugs should be as warm as possible. If the girl with sad eyes is your friend or classmate, a friendly hug on the shoulders will be enough.

Hugging, tell her that you are worried:

  • “I'm sorry that this test upset you. But, believe me, one mark does not decide fate. You are the smartest person in our group, learn everything and shine in the exam. And I will keep my fingers crossed."
  • “Sunny, don’t be upset because Alena came in the same dress. The product is really beautiful. But it looks much more attractive on you. And don’t be offended by your girlfriend: it means that you both have excellent taste. You are my best."

Try to make me laugh

Laughter prolongs life. And yet - uplifting and helps. Therefore, if you know how to joke subtly, go ahead and show your talent!

Having clarified a little the reason for the bad mood, try to avoid ambiguous jokes, as well as those that can aggravate the situation.

  1. Don't be afraid to look funny. Sing a song. And it's even better if a bear stepped on your ear: many DJs think that the meaning of music is in decibels, and that's okay, everyone loves them.

Sing as well as you can, and if you don’t know how, it dramatically increases the likelihood of the result of your efforts.

  1. Tell a funny story. This is also a good version of a monologue with a sad girl. If this story is from your life, embellish it with vivid metaphors. If you are a master at creating comic situations, use your imagination and please her with an unrealistically cool humorous story. Try to talk to her in a humorous tone about the offender (if any).


We all get sad sometimes. The day did not work out, everything falls out of hand, or even a black streak has come. At such moments, encouraging phrases can lift the mood a little. And it happens that we ourselves see such people who need it. But it is not always possible to quickly find the right words. Well, it doesn't hurt to memorize a few phrases. Someday this might come in handy.

For motivation

Encouraging phrases often help perk up. A person needs motivation to do business. If your hands are down, you don’t want to touch the work and the only desire is to lie on the bed in front of the TV and wrap yourself in a blanket, it’s time to remember the thoughtful phrases of famous people.

Nick Vujicic, who is an Australian writer, said: “When faced with difficulties, you cannot give up and run away. You need to assess the situation, start looking for a solution and not lose faith that everything that happens is for the best. Patience is the key to victory."

The American philosopher is known for a shorter but no less truthful phrase. He argued that there should be no boundaries for people.

And the 25th President of the United States, assured that it is worth a person to believe that he can do anything, and half the way has already been passed.

For decisiveness

Encouraging phrases often help to get down to business. William Clement Stone, businessman and author of self-help books, said that a clear goal is the first step to any achievement. Christopher Columbus, who discovered America, liked to assure that a person would never swim across the ocean if he was afraid to lose sight of the shore.

Farrah Gray, a well-known businessman, investor and journalist, said that you should not be afraid to pursue your dreams. Otherwise, there is a great risk of being hired to fulfill other people's desires. And William James, an American philosopher and psychologist of the 19th century, was sure that a power is hidden in the human subconscious that can turn the whole world upside down. Encouraging phrases like this encourage thoughtful thought and action, it's worth recognizing.

To set the mood

Words can really mean a lot. And it is quite possible to cheer up with a phrase on a working day, even if he didn’t ask in the morning. Norma Jean Monterson (better known as Marilyn Monroe) once said these words: “Smile. After all, life is the most beautiful thing in the world. And there are plenty of reasons to smile." After such words, you involuntarily think and understand that the actress was right.

But sometimes the sayings of celebrities sound like a lesson. In this case, humorous phrases will come to the rescue. To cheer up a person, there is nothing better. You can say: “If it can’t get any worse, then it’s time to start enjoying the prospect!” From such an expression, a person at least smiles. You can also say that a positive plus is always found, even in the most negative minus. And this, by the way, is a fact.

It is important to know

Sometimes our loved ones have problems in life. The mood rushes into the abyss, and it becomes painful to look at a loved one. And it is difficult to find the right expression that could demonstrate one's attitude and feelings to the situation. Especially often, girls are interested in how to cheer up a man with words. Phrases cannot be universal, it all depends on a particular situation. But in any case, declarations of love will lift the mood at least a little. They are not redundant.

When a person feels bad, the best thing that a loved one can do is to demonstrate their feelings and thereby show care.

funny expressions

Continuing the theme of humor, other positive phrases can be noted with attention. In some situations, you can cheer up a loved one with this expression: “The hardest thing in this life is the blue whale. And the rest is nonsense! Another person will definitely smile after such a phrase: “When your things are going badly, it’s better not to go with them.”

Does the conscience gnaw at a person for a stormy rest and doing nothing? It happens. Then this instructive, but cheerful phrase is given to him: "Time spent with pleasure is not considered lost."

These words can also be attributed to the category of smart, but positive expressions: “The best teacher in life is experience. True, he takes a little expensive, but he explains intelligibly. With what you can not argue.

Motivation in a foreign language

Finally, it is worth noting the encouraging phrases in English. They are more concise than ours. Perhaps everyone knows the phrase “Why not?” And it translates like this: “Why not?” But really! Why not? Many people who make this or that decision can be prompted to act by this very phrase. Because in the context it is translated as follows: “What are you actually losing?” And after this phrase, you can send: “It's worth a shot!” Which translates to: "It's worth it!"

And Americans often say the following phrase: “What are you waiting for?” Translated, it means: "What are you waiting for?" And the phrase “What do you have to lose?”, By the way, is translated as follows: “What are you losing?” It should be noted that many foreign expressions aimed at motivating the interlocutor are constructed precisely in the interrogative form. Why? Because a sad / doubting person, having received a question from his interlocutor, subconsciously begins to think and find the right solution to a particular situation. And he understands that the opponent is right.

But there are more artistic expressions as well. For example, such: “Never give up!” (never give up), "It's totally up to you!" (it's up to you), "Follow your dreams" (follow your dreams), etc. Finding the right words for a drooping buddy can be really difficult, but expanding your vocabulary can make it easier.

In life, we often face various obstacles. It can be job loss, illness, death of a family member, financial troubles. At such a moment, it is difficult for a person to find the strength in himself and move on. He so lacks support at this moment, a friendly shoulder, warm words. How to choose the right words of support that can really help a person in difficult times?

Expressions that should not be used

There are a number of familiar phrases that are the first to come to mind when you need to support someone. These words should not be spoken:

  1. Don't worry!
  1. Everything is formed! Everything will be fine!

At the moment when the world collapsed, it sounds like a mockery. A person is faced with the fact that he does not know how to solve his problem. He needs to figure out how to fix things. He is not sure that the situation will turn in his favor, and he will be able to stay afloat. So, how will the empty statement that everything will work out help? All the more blasphemous are such words if your friend has lost a loved one.

  1. Do not Cry!

Tears are the body's natural way of coping with stress. It is necessary to give a person a cry, to speak out, to give vent to emotions. He will feel better. Just hug and be there.

  1. No need to cite as an example people who are even worse

A person who has lost his job and has nothing to feed his family does not care that somewhere in Africa children are starving. Someone who has just learned about a serious diagnosis is not very interested in the statistics of deaths from cancer. It is also not necessary to give examples that relate to mutual acquaintances.

Trying to support a loved one, remember that at the moment he is morally depressed by his problem. It is necessary to carefully select expressions so as not to accidentally offend or touch on a sore subject. Let's find out how to support a person.

Words to Help You Get Through the Tipping Point

When our loved ones find themselves in difficult situations, we are lost and often do not know how to behave. But, the words spoken at the right time can inspire, console, restore faith in oneself. The following phrases will help to feel your support:

  1. We will get through this together.

In difficult times, it is important to know that you are not alone. Let a loved one feel that you care about his grief and that you are ready to share all the difficulties with him.

  1. I understand how you feel.

When you're in trouble, it's important to be heard. It's good to have someone around who understands you. If you have been in a similar situation, please tell us about it. Share your thoughts, emotions at that moment. But no need to tell how you heroically coped with the situation. Just make it clear that you were in your friend's place. But you survived it, and he can handle it too.

  1. Time will pass and it will get easier.

Indeed, this is a fact. We will not remember many of the troubles in life that happened to us a year or two ago. All troubles remain in the past. Sooner or later, we find a replacement for a betrayed friend or unhappy love. Financial problems are also gradually being solved. You can find a new job, pay off a loan, cure an illness or relieve its symptoms. Even the sadness of the death of a loved one passes with time. It is important to get over the moment of shock and move on.

  1. You've been in worse situations. Nothing, you did it!

Surely your friend has already encountered life's obstacles and found a way out of them. Remind him that he is a strong, courageous person and is able to solve any problem. Cheer him up. Show him that he can survive this difficult moment with dignity.

  1. You are not to blame for what happened.

Feeling guilty about what happened is the first thing that prevents you from taking a sober look at the situation. Let your loved one know that this is how the circumstances developed and that anyone else could be in his place. It makes no sense to look for those responsible for the trouble, you need to try to solve the problem.

  1. Is there something I can do for you?

Perhaps your friend needs help, but he does not know who to turn to. Or he doesn't feel comfortable talking about it. Take the initiative.

  1. Say that you admire his endurance and fortitude.

When a person is morally depressed by difficult circumstances, such words inspire. They are able to restore a person's faith in their own strength.

  1. Don't worry, I'll be right there!

These are the most important words that each of us wants to hear at a turning point. Everyone needs someone close and understanding next to them. Don't leave your loved one alone!

Help your friend come up with a sense of humor about the situation. Every drama has a bit of comedy. Lighten up the situation. Laugh together at the girl who left him, or at the pompous director who fired him from his job. This will allow you to look at the situation in a more optimistic way. After all, everything can be solved and corrected while we are alive.

The best support is to be there

The main thing we say is not with words, but with our actions. A sincere hug, a handkerchief or napkin served on time, a glass of water can say more than you think.

Take on some of the household chores. Provide all possible assistance. Indeed, at the moment of shock, a person is not even able to cook dinner, go to the grocery store, pick up children from kindergarten. If your friend has lost a family member, help arrange the funeral. Make the necessary arrangements and just be there.

Smoothly switch the person's attention to something mundane, not related to his grief. Keep him busy with something. Invite to the cinema, order pizza. Find an excuse to go outside and take a walk.

Sometimes silence is better than any, even the most sincere words. Listen to your friend, let him speak, express his emotions. Let him talk about his pain, about how he is confused, depressed. Don't interrupt him. Let him speak his problem out loud as many times as necessary. This will help to look at the situation from the outside, to see solutions. And you just be close to a loved one in a difficult moment for him.

Olga, St. Petersburg

We all know how hard it is to be in a situation where you need to comfort someone, but there are no right words.

Fortunately, more often than not, people don't expect specific advice from us. It is important for them to feel that someone understands them, that they are not alone. So first, just describe how you feel. For example, with the help of such phrases: “I know that it’s very hard for you now”, “I’m sorry that it’s so hard for you.” So you will make it clear that you really see what a loved one is feeling now.

2. Confirm that you understand these feelings.

But be careful, do not draw all the attention to yourself, do not try to prove that you were even worse. Briefly mention that you have also been in a similar situation before, and ask more about the condition of the one you are comforting.

3. Help a loved one sort out the problem

Even if a person is looking for ways to resolve a difficult situation, first he just needs to speak out. This is especially true for women.

So wait to offer solutions to the problem and listen. This will help the person you are comforting to sort out their feelings. After all, sometimes it is easier to understand your own experiences by talking about them to others. Answering your questions, the interlocutor can find some solutions himself, understand that everything is not as bad as it seems, and simply feel relieved.

Here are some phrases and questions that can be used in this case:

  • Tell me what happened.
  • Say what's bothering you.
  • What led to this?
  • Help me understand how you feel.
  • What scares you the most?

At the same time, try to avoid questions with the word "why", they are too similar to condemnation and will only anger the interlocutor.

4. Do not minimize the suffering of the interlocutor and do not try to make him laugh

When we are faced with the tears of a loved one, we, quite naturally, want to cheer him up or convince him that his problems are not so terrible. But what seems trifling to ourselves can often upset others. So don't minimize the other person's suffering.

And if someone really worries about a trifle? Ask if there is any data that diverges from his view of the situation. Then offer your opinion and share an alternative way out. Here it is very important to clarify whether they want to hear your opinion, without this it may seem too aggressive.

5. Offer physical support if appropriate

Sometimes people do not want to talk at all, they just need to feel that there is a loved one nearby. In such cases, it is not always easy to decide how to behave.

Your actions should correspond to the usual behavior with this or that person. If you are not too close, it will be enough to put a hand on your shoulder or lightly hug. Also look at the behavior of the other person, perhaps he himself will make it clear what he needs.

Remember that you should not be too zealous when comforting: a partner may take this for flirting and be offended.

6. Suggest ways to solve the problem

If the person only needs your support and not specific advice, the above steps may be sufficient. By sharing your experiences, your interlocutor will feel relieved.

Ask if there is anything else you can do. If the conversation takes place in the evening, and most often it does, offer to go to bed. As you know, the morning is wiser than the evening.

If your advice is needed, ask first if the other person has any ideas. Decisions are made more readily when they come from someone who is in a contentious situation. If the person you are comforting has a vague idea of ​​what can be done in their position, help develop concrete steps. If he does not know what to do at all, offer your options.

If a person is sad not because of any particular event, but because he has, immediately proceed to a discussion of specific actions that can help. Or offer to do something like go for a walk together. Excessive thinking will not only not help get rid of depression, but, on the contrary, will aggravate it.

7. Promise to continue to support

At the end of the conversation, be sure to mention again that you understand how hard it is for a loved one now, and that you are ready to continue to support him in everything.

Everyone has days when the burden of problems is piling up with all its weight and it seems that difficult times will never end. At such a moment, it is important to give a person self-confidence, motivate him to take action so that he can cope with all the troubles. In this article, we have collected 20 phrases in English that will help you cheer up a depressed friend and give him hope for better times. Examples from popular movies and songs will help you remember interesting expressions.

We want to emphasize that we provide official translations of phrases. They do not always accurately reflect what the characters said. Why not improve your English and watch movies and series in the original? :-)

You have probably heard these short phrases in English-language films and TV shows. So native speakers encourage each other in a difficult situation. Let's look at an example of the use of such a phrase from the movie "Terminal".

This is a rather informal phrase that you might say to a close friend. It will be especially appropriate when a person takes minor problems too seriously, takes everything to heart.

Please note: the word lighten is also translated as “become brighter”, “flare up” (with light). Therefore, in the movie "Batman Begins" the phrase was used as a play on words: Batman is urged to relax and at the same time set on fire.

This phrase is very popular with native speakers. They say it to encourage a person to do everything in his power, everything possible to achieve the goal. You can also use it on yourself to tell someone that you will do your best: I'll do my best! - I will do my best / everything I can!

Let's remember how the mother of the protagonist uses this phrase in the movie "Forrest Gump".

The expression is very similar to the previous one. It is used when calling for making every effort to accomplish something. The word shot in English literally translates as "shot", so the phrase is often used as a play on words. Let's see how the characters of the movie "007: Skyfall Coordinates" do it.

We think you understand the meaning of this proverb: luck comes to the person who acts boldly. Literally, we can translate the phrase as "fortune favors the brave."

6. You "re on the right track - you are on the right track

The expression to be on the right track means "to be on the right track." You can use it, for example, when your friend decided to stop complaining about not having time to learn English and decided to start studying. In addition, such a phrase is said to a person who has begun to guess about something, has come close to the truth, for example, as in the movie "Upstart".

7. (The) sky's the limit - all paths are open, the possibilities are not limited by anything

This English idiom is very popular. Native speakers usually use it when they want to communicate that there is no limit to something (most often possibilities). If your friend is dreaming about something and believes that his wish will not come true, encourage him with this phrase and remind him that there are no limits to his dream. Let's remember how Michael Jackson used this expression in one of his most famous songs Bad.

well they say the sky's the limit
And to me that's really true
But my friend you have seen nothin"
Just wait "til I get through...

Such a phrase is used to convey to a person the idea: when things go wrong and it seems that everything is falling apart, strong people do not give up, but get down to business and change circumstances for the better. We found an example of the use of this expression in the cartoon "The Lion King 2: Simba's Pride". See how the brave Timon uses it when his friends are in trouble.

9. Where there "s a will there" s a way - there would be a desire, but there is an opportunity

Does your friend say they want to be fluent in English but don't know how to achieve this goal? Be sure to tell him about this wonderful proverb, which has an analogue in Russian. And be sure to review "Shrek" in English to find out how the donkey uses this phrase.

Also in English, the expression to see light at the end of the tunnel is popular (to see the light at the end of the tunnel). Use this phrase to cheer up your despondent friend. Let's remember how they do it in the movie "Mixed".

Most importantly, don't let a frustrated person listen to a Metallica song that uses this beautiful expression in a not-so-positive way :-)

Then it comes to be that
the soothing light at the end of your tunnel
Was just a freight train coming your way.

This expression does not seem very motivating at first glance, but you need to learn how to use it correctly. For example, your friend fails something, but you convince him to try again and say that he still has nothing to lose, even if the attempt fails.

12. If at first you don "t succeed ... (try and try again) - if you didn’t succeed right away, try and try again

Did your friend fail to understand conditional sentences and decided that foreign languages ​​are not for him? Then remind him of the good old English proverb. She calls not to give up at the first setbacks, to fight obstacles and continue on your way to the goal. Let's hear how Madonna uses this phrase in her song Over And Over.

I"m never gonna stop"till I get my fill
It doesn't matter who you are
It's what you do that takes you far
And if at first you don't succeed
Here's some advice that you should heed.

13. Every dog ​​has its/his day - and there will be a holiday on our street

This expression is used to say that even the most seemingly unlucky people have successful days and periods in their lives. Despite the wording, the phrase carries a positive message: with its help, you tell a person that happy days will come, you just need to wait a bit. Let's hear how beautifully Bon Jovi sings about this in the song Santa Fe.

They say that no man is an island
And good things come to those who wait
But the things I hear are there just to remind me
Every dog ​​will have his day.

14. (To keep one's) fingers crossed - let's hope that ...; I keep my fingers crossed for you

This expression is used when you want to express the hope that someone's wish will come true, that someone will succeed. The phrase can be used as a separate sentence and translated as "I keep my fists for you", or it can be part of a sentence. Let's see how the characters of the film "The Prestige" use this expression.

15. You can "t make an omelette without breaking eggs - you can't make an omelet without breaking eggs; they cut the forest - chips fly

Sometimes you have to sacrifice something to get what you want. In this case, your support is especially important to the person, and the English have a great proverb for this. Let's remember how the heroes of the Doctor Who series used it.

16. It "s not the end of the world - this is not the end of the world, life goes on

Has your friend failed and become depressed? Then use this phrase to let him know that everything that happened is just a minor turmoil, life goes on and he will still have many opportunities to make his dreams come true. Recall how, in the movie Sean of the Dead, this phrase is used by Ed to cheer up his friend Sean, who had a fight with a girl.

By the way, we want to draw your attention to another interesting phrase - there are plenty more fish in the sea (literally - "there are a lot of fish in the sea"). It can be translated into Russian as "the light on her / him did not converge like a wedge." Use this phrase to cheer up a friend who is having problems in his personal life.

Another phrase will help you cheer up a friend who is in a hopeless situation, as it seems to him. Let's remember how the hero of the movie "Wasteland" uses it.

18. Look on the bright side - look at things with optimism, be an optimist; try to find something good in a bad situation

This phrase is very popular with native speakers. Use it when a person is in a bad situation and you want to cheer them up and draw their attention to the positive side of the situation. For example, your friend did not go on vacation this summer. Tell him that he saved money and now he can buy something useful for himself. And here is how this idiom is used in the song What I Like about You by Sunrise Avenue.

Some days you know it's too hard to look at the bright side
Some days you wanna run from it all, then hide
Sometimes you feel like all that you need is a short break
Some days you feel alone
And it's too much to take.

19. There's no use crying over spilt milk - you can't help grief with tears; what's done is done

Such a phrase literally translates as “there is no point in crying over spilled milk” and does not sound as soft as the previous ones. But it will help you convey to the person the idea that you can’t turn back what has been done, you shouldn’t sit and worry about it, you need to move on. Here is how the characters of the movie "At the end of the day" use this phrase.

The phrase is similar to the previous ones and is also often used by native speakers. Use it when you want to tell a friend that even a problem sometimes has its positive sides and everything is not as bad as it seems. Do you want to know how this interesting expression appeared? Then read our article "". Now let's look at an example of the use of this idiom in the movie Stuart Little 2.

Of course, it is not easy to remember all the phrases from the first reading, so we have collected expressions for you in a file that we recommend you keep for yourself. Reread it periodically, try to memorize new phrases, and soon you will be able to use them in your speech.

(*.pdf, 212 Kb)

Now your vocabulary has been replenished with 20 new encouraging phrases. Try to learn them, and in the meantime we will prepare another useful article for you. Do your best!