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The right motivation for teenagers. Problems of teenagers: how to motivate to study

The problem of low motivation in high school is relevant in any educational institution, a rare parent has not encountered it. I know from my own experience how parents perceive this. Usually you can hear such words: “I don’t understand what happened to him! In elementary school, Elena Ivanovna praised us, but when she came to the fifth school, it was as if they had changed the child!

Some begin to look for the reason in the teachers who teach in the classroom with their son, daughter. Perhaps, of course, the reason is in one of the teachers, but this probability is negligible.

Some parents look at their child's grades and say, “Is that why he got an A in 4th grade and an A in 5th grade? This Ekaterina Ivanovna is apparently picking on him!”

Or maybe the fact is that your fifth-grader's program has become more complicated, the teacher is new, to which he has not yet got used?

adaptation period. Don't make mistakes

Fifth graders, like first graders, adaptation period, during which they get used to the new rules, teachers, class teacher. No matter how children are prepared for this transition, changes, for any child it is stress that prevents them from concentrating on their studies. Therefore, just be at that moment next to your child, keep in touch with the class teacher. During this period, it is not necessary to say (especially in front of a child) that one of the teachers does not inspire confidence in you, to doubt his professional suitability.

A case from one's life

I had such a case. A new girl came to my class (then it was 5th grade). Judging by the report sheet, which she brought from her previous place of study, the girl was a C student in almost all subjects. She joined the team well, took part in class and school events, but there was a whole problem with English lessons. After the teacher gave her a deuce for the wrong translation, the girl stopped going to these lessons. No conversations with the teacher, parents did not help.

And one day we just talked to her and touched on the English task, to which she said: “Mom said that this (name, patronymic of the English teacher) gives everyone undeservedly bad marks. It's time for her to retire." It was unpleasant. It should also be noted that if the teacher is the main authority for the younger schoolchild, then in the secondary school the importance of the teacher in the eyes of schoolchildren falls. Therefore, I tried to convince the fifth grader that she was wrong, of course, but I realized from her eyes that I hadn’t convinced her, because everything had already agreed in her head: I have “two”, because the English teacher is bad.

Then I had a conversation with my parents about it. Attendance, and then academic performance in this subject, improved for this girl.

The transition to the 5th grade for almost all children coincides with beginning of adolescence children gradually become teenagers. Hormonal disruptions begin, the body is rebuilt, changing. At this moment, the teenager himself does not know what he wants: tastes, interests, priorities change (this is why parents cannot recognize their changed children).

Communication becomes the leading activity. Now the authority for the child will be the one who has become his friend all this time (not necessarily peers, but parents can be). And that's why problems begin that did not exist before. This is not at all because your child has become bad, he just grows up and does not understand why everything has changed so much - just teenagers begin to look at the world differently.

How to deal with a teenager

At this moment, you need to start treating him like an adult, forget that he is only 12. No need to put pressure, try to insist on your own, because now it will be useless to achieve something. Try to talk confidentially, without judgment, with your child and discuss problems at school, poor performance. Most often, these are problems in relationships with someone that your child is very worried about (I said above that communication is the leading activity). Discuss the situation and make it clear that you are on his side, ready to help. When these external problems improve, then the problems with learning can be solved.

If the problem of low motivation is in the study itself (that is, it is not interesting, does not understand the material of some educational subjects), watch entertaining educational videos on the Internet on subjects that are especially difficult for a child and discuss them together. Maybe it is your joint views that will help the child look at school differently.

And do not forget about teachers and class teachers who can also help you with this. Be sure to keep in touch with them, discuss problems.

It also happens that the reason for the decline in academic performance in a particular subject depends on difficulties in relations with the teacher (we are all people, and we are all different). In these cases, do not rush to run to the school and accuse the teacher of incompetence or complain to the education authorities. Try to understand the situation. Talk to the class teacher, ask him to help you find out what caused the conflict. Meet the teacher with the child, find out the essence of the claims against him and listen to the son or daughter about this, try to find a solution to this situation together. I am sure that you will succeed, and the child’s attitude to this subject will change for the better.

Motivation with material values ​​- is it worth it?

Another way that some parents “boast” is to motivate the child to study with something material (for example, if you finish the week without twos, we will buy a phone, or if you finish the quarter with “4” and “5”, we will go to the sea, etc. .). But is this method really effective in this case? Someone may now object to me: “Of course, because the child is trying to get good grades in order to get what was promised from his parents!”. I will try to prove to you that this has nothing to do with increasing his motivation to study.

What do we get as a result of this method of motivation?

  • "False motivation". Those. the child does not understand that he needs to study, and not the parents who are so persistently trying to get him to get good grades and go to school.
  • Consumer Education. The child begins to understand that for every good deed, service, he can get something in return.
  • "Begging" for marks teachers and the perception of this as a competition. Those. there is no interest in learning as such, but only in the marks that the child is ready to receive at any cost.
  • Failures in studies (bad grades, comments from teachers, etc.) can provoke irritation, frustration, stress from the child due to the fact that this will prevent him from getting what he wants from his parents. All this will only aggravate the relationship between him and educational activities.

As you can see from all of the above, the result is a child who is chasing good grades, but still remains with low interest in learning and low motivation.

I hope I was able to show you that motivating a child to study with material things is not an effective way if you really want to increase interest in learning, and not FORCE him to get good grades.

Patience...

Increasing the motivation to study is not only the activity of parents or only teachers, schools, but a joint work that requires tactics and patience.

Remember that a teenager is no longer a child, so try to talk more with your child without pressure. And you will definitely succeed if there is complete understanding between you and your child. And for this, learn to understand and accept it as an adult.

The day a child realizes that all adults are imperfect,
- becomes a teenager
the day he forgives them, he becomes an adult;
the day he forgives himself, he becomes wise.
Alden Nolan

1. Own example

If you yourself are constantly learning and enthusiastically sharing your discoveries, then the child remembers that this is great. And if you constantly reproach him, “I’ve been studying all my life, and you are an ignoramus and disgrace me,” then the child remembers that studying is bad and worst of all, he himself, who is not able to meet the requirements of his parents.

Your conversations about where you've been, what you've learned, who you've met, and your excitement about the process of discovering the world will give you a longer lasting result. Sooner or later your child will do the same.

2. Vaccination to do what they say without thinking

Teenagers need this vaccination and they receive it in full in a traditional school. The demands of teachers should not completely replace your relationship with your son or daughter. You are not teachers, you are parents.
Discuss with your children that sometimes you have to do what you are told. Useful life skill, in reasonable application.

3. Learning outside of school

Unfortunately, an interesting school life and study are two different things. Studying is super control, a constant load of meaningless knowledge and running in circles from countless demands. Zero joy and constant negativity from failures.
Therefore, look for options for additional education. Without tedious meaningless homework, grades and motionless silent sitting at desks. Look for those people who can teach your children differently, with joy and understanding.

4. Inoculation of joy from the process of learning

Parents are obliged not only to control and read morality. They must be able to enjoy the knowledge of the world and teach this to their children. If you don't know how, see point 3.

Remember, if your child gets an A in math and never learns how to solve trigonometric inequalities, then this is not a tragedy. You will not become bad parents therefore. But if you allow your child to hate everything that has to do with learning, then you will definitely be a bad parent.

5. Encourage inner impulses

Build intrinsic motivation. And for this you need to know the inner desires of your child and support them. Even if they seem absurd to you. If you are very afraid of this, then these are your demons, do not impose your own fears on children. From small and strange desires, you will move on to big and ambitious ones.

6. Inoculation of independence

Let the teenager learn to live his desires and distinguish good from bad on his own. Independence is not permissiveness, it is responsibility for one's decisions. Therefore, if a teenager decides something, let the responsibility be on him, and not on you.

It is possible and necessary to object in cases that will affect the health of your child, may directly threaten his life. Here I’ll say right away that teenagers do not always adequately assess such threats, life seems to them endless, without pain and death. However, dear parents, 2 points in chemistry in the certificate are not such a threat. Chemistry assessment is your child's decision, for which he can be fully responsible.

How parents can increase the learning motivation of students

1. Discuss with your child the importance of school and education. It is very important.

2. Ask your child every day how his day at school was. Make sure he gives you the details.

3. Find out if he has been given homework or any project in class that he has to do.

4. If your child doesn't have any homework, make sure they spend at least 30 minutes studying, watching and practicing the lessons.

5. Read and talk to your child about any signs of progress he is making at home. If necessary, put some restrictions on his actions or do something about his bad behavior.

6. Encourage positive action. Do not focus your attention only on his negative actions or bad behavior.

7. Support your child, even if he did not pass any exam or test.

8. If your child has learning problems, he needs additional help from a teacher, home tutor.

9. Talk to their teacher about various alternatives or resources that can help your child if he or she has learning problems.

10. Most importantly, be in regular contact with your child's teachers who monitor your child's progress and behavior in school.

11. Clearly set goals for a teenager: what we want to achieve, what knowledge to have.

12. Determine and announce the deadlines for the implementation of the goal (when I fix this, I will learn it).

13. If possible, determine the applied orientation of training. (Why do I need to know this, how will I apply it in my life?).

14. Clearly and timely track the results of your own child's activities in the process of all work (study).

15. Develop reward techniques (praise in front of the whole family). Praise for the work - stimulate motivation.

16. Positively, regularly support your teenager. A kind word and good advice is better than reprimand.

17. Make reasonable demands on your teenager. (But you can ...).

18. Since the leading activity of a teenager is communication, grouping, learning should take place through communication. Evaluate the positive actions of the child, ask for an opinion on the subject, discuss the subject with him.

19. Don't compare your teen's learning outcomes to those in the class as this can lead to irritation.

20. Love the child.

schooladmin

A dad once asked me a serious question: “How can you motivate a teenager to study?” The problem is quite understandable and, alas, familiar to many. But writing about it and giving advice is quite difficult. In the case of preschool children, I always have confidence that it will work out. Well, there are no babies without a cognitive need. All that is required is to direct this need in the right direction. But with teenagers, "light artillery" will not help. Yes, and heavy too - swearing, blackmail and punishment will only aggravate the situation.

What to do?

- Remember that the driving motivation for learning is interest in it, understanding why it is needed and satisfaction with intermediate results. The teenager must realize the value of learning. Myself. For real (and not “yes, yes, dad, I agree with you - just get off!”).

Talking about the fact that the school provides the necessary knowledge, that without education one cannot find a good job, that the foundation of the future is being laid right now - it may make sense when a teenager is ready to hear you, when he has already raised these questions on his own and pondered them. Otherwise, you are just wasting time (stranded, Emelya, your week - but I can’t hear you).

What, nothing can be done? You can, but you should forget about moralizing and frontal attack. Let's take a detour.

The simplest option: your child has a certain hobby, which may become his calling. At the same time, his hobby is already tied (or can easily be tied) to one or another school subject - mathematics, programming, English, biology, .... In this case, it is worth throwing information to the teenager about things that interest him. Interested in computers? - Tell us about the latest developments in this area. Who creates software or invents computer toys, where and in what companies these people work, where you can learn something interesting and meet professionals. Watch with your child YouTube videos of Zuckerberg, Jobs (whom does your offspring respect? ;)) Mention that companies like Google and Microsoft are "hunting" for talented students. But in order to get into their network and gain experience in a unique environment, you need to be a student. And, preferably, a student of a good university. And in order to enter this university ... Do you understand what I'm getting at? 😉

Please note: first we throw in information that is interesting to the child. Not once, but for some time. Let the child feel your interest and support. And only then we unobtrusively discuss issues related to the university and study.

The second option: the child has not yet decided on a vocation and even a direction, but he has different hobbies from which something useful can be pulled out. Unless, of course, you approach the situation creatively and wisely 😉 For example, your child is a fan of a musical group. American. Ask him to translate a couple of his favorite songs. Difficult? - but with knowledge of English it would be much easier. And it would be possible to communicate on forums with fans from other countries ...

Does your daughter like to look at the "bows" of the stars? - find an English-language site on this topic ...

Does your son play on the computer all the time? Try showing him Scratch, a program that makes it easy to create your own games. You look, the child will take a great interest in programming.

Your task is to "tie" the interests of the child to a particular school subject. Make this item a useful tool to help a teenager.

You say: “But what about the rest of the items?”. But the fact is that if a child begins to engage in something with enthusiasm, English, for example, then the situation with studies as a whole will normalize. Firstly, a teenager gains experience of deep study of a certain subject, hard and purposeful work, which can then be transferred to other areas. And secondly, his enthusiasm will help him move into the category of “almost determined” children, which we discussed above.

The most difficult situation. Your child does not have any hobbies, at least somewhat related to study. He just wants to go out with his friends and drive a loafer. In this case, occupational therapy often helps. Yes, yes, I am absolutely serious. One of my acquaintances arranged for his son who was on a spree to his warehouse. For him to work in the summer - 8 hours a day, as expected, and with a standard (ridiculous) salary. - Do you want, son, to work all your life and count pennies? You don't have to study anymore. In the fall, the son took up his mind. I graduated from high school and entered a good university.

The idea is simple: let the child feel the charm of low-skilled labor, not in words, but in deeds. And then let him think.

And now the most important thing. Try to honestly answer the question for yourself: what exactly do you want from your child? That he had a decent certificate? Or for him to find his calling, be truly passionate about something, be able to independently search for information and work hard in an area of ​​interest to him? Remember that the second option will not necessarily imply the implementation of the first.

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How to motivate your teenager to study: 20 comments

  1. RitaR

    The last tip is very good. Need to try! The second tip is even better. But I don't think it's very easy to do. It is necessary not only to know your child thoroughly, but also to have an extensive outlook (for example, I have no idea what Scratch is)

  2. Larissa

    So ... Now we are waiting for the text on the motivation of preschoolers and younger students))

  3. Nika

    As I understand it, the advice is more suitable for adult teenagers - grades 10-11. What about 7th and 8th graders?

    1. Victor

      This is just for 7-8 graders and there is advice.
      I think it's worth mentioning the school environment as well. I fought for almost a year so that my son would stop believing that if he is the best student in the class and he does not have triples in a quarter, then this is the ceiling. Parents need to find out about academic performance in the class, and if it is completely bad, then you can think about transferring to another class or school before it's too late. Moreover, this is possible and is the most effective way, since we will face the truth - most parents have not taken care of their children and will not take care of them.

    2. Irina Rogozhkina Post Author

      I would separately advise 7-8-graders to try to broaden their horizons and try a variety of activities. To be honest, I wouldn't be particularly bothered by a boy who doesn't study well, but at the same time actively develops his brain in his own affairs and hobbies. But if such cases and hobbies are not observed, then it is worth considering.
      Another important point! I would not advise constantly lamenting with a child: “Oh, he is smart and capable, only a lazy person, he doesn’t want to do anything!” The fact is that the child in such a situation finds himself in a very comfortable position. He is considered capable and intelligent. And, since he does nothing, he does not put his “reputation” at risk. But if he still wanted to start studying, he might not have come out. Suddenly problems would arise. Is it worth the risk... Teenagers are often afraid to start doing something out of fear that it will not work out. It’s much more convenient to assume that you are very “cool”, you just don’t need anything.

  4. Irina Rogozhkina Post Author

    Great comment from Tatyana Limanovna!
    If it refers to children of middle school age (grades 3-7), then I completely agree. The problem is that for high school students, arguments like “my duty is to work, yours is to study well” do not always work. It usually works in those cases when the child already has an internal motivation for learning - an interest in certain subjects, a desire to enter a university, ... But if there is no internal motivation, then something needs to be invented.
    And about “it is interesting to study”: That's right - ALL subjects really cannot be interesting. And the older the child becomes, the more elements of obligation and even coercion (self-coercion) should be in the learning process. But if we talk about preschool age (and, perhaps, 1st grade), then interest must be present MANDATORY. It is he who will become the foundation on which abilities, the ability to work and other things will then grow.

  5. Andrey

    There is no motivation in the university, as there is no goal. Ask yourself, how many students in the university know the curriculum? And there it is written exactly what students will learn after they spend the 5 best years of their lives, and many also for a fee. Most do not understand until the end of the fifth year what they will do at work, what skills and knowledge they will need and how they will apply them. Thus, the PURPOSE of learning is completely absent, there is no benchmark to which students go, they have nothing to compare with, whether they got what they need or not. The only guideline is a diploma, so there are a lot of graduate students on the market and very few of those who can really do something in their specialty.

Teaching a child at school is a long and not always easy process. Elementary classes, as a rule, do not bring much trouble to parents. The child enjoys going to school and doing homework. He is interested in learning and interacting with peers. In the middle classes, most children, as a rule, also study without problems, provided there are no significant gaps in the study of the material. But the study of high school students is a completely different process, a different motivation and a higher responsibility. There are such terms as "Unified State Examination", "certificate", "entrance examinations", "future profession".

global change

The life of a teenager without studying is a real explosive mixture: puberty, the first truly strong love experiences, the desire for rebellion and other imperfections of this world. This adds conflicts with peers and parents, they cannot be avoided. And besides this, there are still friends, social networks, computer games, dates and hobbies.

In such conditions, even excellent students in the middle classes - in the senior ones can "roll" into triples. For one reason or another, a teenager's motivation to study can be significantly reduced. What should parents do in this case, and how to restore the child's interest in learning?

The danger of this whole situation is that the teenager himself ceases to see the full gravity of his situation. In children of this age, authorities disappear, and poor school performance does not only cause apathy and the desire to somehow finish their studies. Parents can no longer simply force a child to learn, as they did in elementary or middle grades, when praise or punishment were significant factors in the learning process. Skipping lessons at this age becomes a frequent problem even for excellent students. Moreover, psychologists say that, having skipped a lesson for the first time, a child at the level of chemical processes in the brain remembers this pleasant feeling of relief, the absence of difficulties, and the teenager seeks to repeat it again and again.

Responsibility for your own future

Understanding why a teenager needs to study is the strongest factor in motivating them to study. It's good if he knows exactly who he wants to be in the future. In this case, it is worth seriously discussing with your son or daughter how he is going to achieve this, and what items he needs to pull up so that his plans become a reality. Try not to discuss with your child your financial options regarding the payment of his education at the university. Let him be sure that he can only enter on his own, if he passes the final and entrance exams well.

During the summer holidays, invite your child to get a job. As a rule, hard physical work (not necessarily construction, finishing work is good), even for more or less acceptable money, better than abstract concepts makes a teenager understand how important it is to study and master some kind of mental profession. Your task is to ensure that during this transitional period the child begins to study not for parents, good grades or financial incentives. He must understand that he is studying for himself, now, with his own hands he is building the foundation of his future.

Adolescence is the best time to stop doing for the child what he can do for himself. Indeed, during this period of life, a teenager seeks to get rid of parental custody as soon as possible. Let it be your agreement: the child decides what to wear and how to do homework, but also takes care of shoes on his own or earns pocket money.

What not to do

  • Do not compare your teenager with other peers who are more successful in their studies, do not use as an example his friend who is a good student. Moreover, do not do this in the presence of the very Sasha who studies well. At this age, such tactics can lead to the opposite - to irritation, denial of the need to learn, to an unwillingness to be like others. It's much better to compare a student's progress today with what they've done in the past.
  • In the same way, it will not work with a teenager and a ban on what you think prevents him from learning: communicating on the Internet, meeting friends offline, watching TV shows. A teenager is no longer a child, so without the necessary motivation, he will rather lie stubbornly on the couch and look at the ceiling.
  • Do not focus on the number of good grades, it is better to praise for the quality of knowledge. Nowadays, the presence of a "gold medal" is no longer a guarantee of a brilliant future in a prestigious university in the country. Let the teenager have fives in those subjects that he really needs in the future, but deserved than in all subjects, but thanks to the fact that he memorized the material.
  • Do not allow yourself with a child arrogant statements about other people, and especially teachers. So the teenager will understand that he can also treat others in this way and not put them in a penny. The child must learn - from the teacher, older friends, acquaintances, parents. Too high an opinion of his person will only harm him.

The joy of learning new things

Teaching a teenager to experience the joy of learning something new is half the battle in the process of motivating him to study. How to do this, you should be more aware, because only you know your child well. Share your daily discoveries and teach this to your child. Do it not feignedly, “for show”, but sincerely and with enthusiasm. Try to connect everyday small "insights" with the school curriculum. Over time, the teenager himself will rejoice, learning the world, learning new things in the classroom.

Visual internship

In the educational system of Western countries, there is something like career guidance. It happens in the following way. The child is “implanted” for a while in some professional environment, say, banking, or, for example, left in the kitchen of some prestigious restaurant. Children are quickly inspired, and after a certain period of time they return with a dream - to become a cool chef or financial analyst. After that, the teachers clearly guide the teenager to the subjects that he will need for this.

If you have a familiar professional, a person who has taken place in his field, whom you trust, you can organize something similar. After the child has a "fire in the eye", discuss the list of items without which he will not be able to achieve his dream. Even better - make a detailed plan, how you see his further training.

A good example is contagious

Set a personal example for your teenager. Even at puberty, your child is still guided by his parents. If they themselves, instead of learning something new, spend time on gadgets or watching the next “soap” on TV, then why do they require their child to “burn” while studying? Lead an active lifestyle, do something that you have long dreamed of, learn to ski, skate. Finally, sign up for a foreign language or acting course. For a teenager, this will be a great motivation.

Remember that even children have ambitions. Remind your teenager more often that only with good academic success will he be able to build a career and get everything he wants. Share how you dealt with similar challenges when you were studying. Tell me how you regret that at one time you did not pay enough attention to history or geography, and now you are ashamed that you cannot, for example, remember the capitals of the main European states or confuse historical dates. Be glad that you have a second chance to go through the material with your child. And remember your school years more often - this way you will put yourself in the place of a child and really understand what he wants and what he strives for.