I want to find my soul mate, but for some reason it does not work out. Love: Do soulmates exist?

15.05.2019

Although Valentine's Day is a holiday for lovers, a single person can also celebrate it in an interesting and unforgettable way. And how to spend this day if there is no second half yet?

Mark or not?

On Valentine's Day, all lovers meet and go to cafes, cinemas, restaurants or just spend time together. But what if there is no second half yet? To sit at home and envy all those who spend time with their loved ones? No, you shouldn't do this.

And even if you are not in love yet, but you love your friends, relatives, yourself, finally. So why not spend time with whoever you want, or just arrange an individual holiday? After all, sometimes we spend so little time on ourselves. Let Valentine's Day be an occasion for you to finally pamper and please yourself. And let this holiday be remembered with positive impressions and emotions!

What if everyone is asking questions?

How to respond to questions from others about your personal life? You can simply answer that personal life is personal and is not subject to discussion. Believe me, after such an answer, the desire to continue the questioning will disappear. But what if someone decides to take pity on you? Stop these attempts immediately!

Explain that you are not suffering without love (which is probably what many people think), but enjoying your free life. And you can say that you are waiting for your prince. What to do if you come across an annoying and very curious interlocutor who wants to find out why you don’t have a second half? You should not make excuses and start a long monologue about your shortcomings, which probably scare away the representatives of the stronger sex. Say that while you are waiting for your handsome prince.

Explain that you have very high requirements for your beloved, and so far there has not been that person who would be worthy of you. And you can also stun the curious with the phrase: “I will certainly arrange a casting (or competition) to choose the best guy.” Or laugh it off by saying that you have taken a vow of celibacy. Let the one who decided to find out all the details of your personal life understand that you definitely do not worry about the absence of a loved one.

How to mark?

How to celebrate Valentine's Day alone? There are a lot of options, so you will definitely choose something to your liking.

Arrange a day of relaxation and beauty for yourself. Sign up at the spa for a range of relaxing treatments. Go to a beauty salon and change your image. Change your hairstyle, hair color. Be sure to go shopping and get some new beautiful things. Who knows, perhaps, in an updated form, you will be able to unexpectedly meet your fate on Valentine's Day. Miracles happen if you believe in them!
If you have a single girlfriend or multiple friends, spend time with them. You can simply invite them home and arrange, for example,. And you can go to a nightclub, cinema or just for a walk in the park or in the forest. Have fun, enjoy the company of those who are dear to you!
Arrange a real exciting adventure! For example, if you have long wanted to visit a place, go to an area that you have never been to, or go out of town or even to another city, take a trip on this day! Buy a ticket or get behind the wheel of a private car and get ready for new interesting and vivid impressions. By the way, perhaps elsewhere you will find what you have been looking for for a long time.
And you can arrange a real home holiday. Sleep, let yourself lie in bed longer, get up, enjoy aromatic coffee and, read a magazine, look at your favorite, fill the bath with aromatic foam and immerse yourself in it, taking a glass of wine or champagne with you, try on all your clothes, turn on the music at full volume and dance. In general, do whatever you want, without thinking about anyone or anything! You'll like it!
Arrange. And let it seem crazy and stupid to you, but Saint Valentine will surely approve of such an act and give you something unforgettable. Register on a dating site, find a nice guy and make a date with him. And let this meeting lead to nothing, but you will have an interesting and fun time. But a new acquaintance can end in a serious, long-term and fruitful relationship.
Winter is not a reason to be sad, but a time for real winter fun. Go ice skating or take a walk in the beautiful winter forest. Roll in the snow, go downhill on a sled, run, frolic, enjoy this season, it will end very soon.
If you are attracted to extreme ideas, then plan something crazy for February 14th. For example, you can go snowboarding, skydiving, or do something that you have never done or were afraid to do.
Have a cooking day. Prepare some unusual dish or order something tasty or unusual.
Spend time with your family and friends, because these are the people you love the most. Buy them valentines too, do something nice for them.
If you dream of meeting your other half, then take a piece of paper and a pen, sit down and write a list of the qualities of your ideal lover. Write down everything that you would like to see in a young man. Also list what is unacceptable for you. Describe not only character traits, but also features of appearance. If you know how to draw or use graphic editors, then make a portrait of the second half or an identikit.
Fulfill your dream or at least desire. For example, if you have long wanted to buy in a fashion store, then do it! Do not spare money at least on this day, so that it will be remembered and, perhaps, become important and decisive. Probably, it is this chic dress that will make that handsome man from the neighboring house, whom you have been looking at for a long time, pay attention to you.
Devote a day to a hobby. If you are fond of knitting, then get new knitting needles and yarn, find an interesting pattern and knit something original and very beautiful.
Just go for a walk around the city. Yes, yes, even an aimless walk can end up with a romantic date, which, in turn, will develop into a relationship.

How not to celebrate Valentine's Day?

If you are invited for a walk by a familiar couple, for example, a friend and her boyfriend, in no case do not agree! You will feel extremely uncomfortable and, probably, involuntarily begin to envy.
Don't let yourself get depressed about missing your other half. Enjoy your freedom, dream and know that the best is yet to come.
Do not go to places where there are a lot of lovers, such as popular cafes or restaurants. It is better to visit a less popular place, you will probably see free young people there.

Make Valentine's Day memorable!

Many believe that the fate of a person is predetermined from the moment of his birth. The same applies to the second half. Thus, we can change partners until we meet someone who is completely suitable for us, our betrothed.

No wonder this person is called the second half. After all, partners in a harmonious pair complement each other, help each other to become better and move forward.

By the way, at first we cannot always understand that this or that person is destined to become our soul mate. Sometimes people take years to realize that they really are perfect for each other. Often, at the first meeting, future spouses do not even find their future spouse physically attractive. However, something pushes you towards, and in the end you realize that you are destined to be together.

Each of us imagines our ideal partner in our own way. So, we determine how tall he should be, what color his hair should be and how much money he earns. But if you're brave enough to put aside your list of ideal partner traits for a while, break away from romantic movies, and open your heart, you'll probably meet your fiancé soon.

you just know it

Something inside you says this is perfect. It is as if some unknown force is pushing you, and you willy-nilly part with your previous expectations and completely surrender to a new relationship.

you crossed paths before

Almost certainly the ideal partners have already met somewhere before. So, perhaps you were in the same place at the same time as your significant other. But then you didn't know each other. However, fate wanted your paths to cross again in the right place.

Your souls meet at the right time

You must be ready to meet your soul mate. You can be close to your future loved one for many years, but at the same time you will not have any spiritual connection until the right time comes. After all, you may first be destined to go through a failed relationship or finally say goodbye to your youthful fantasies of an ideal partner. But there comes a moment when you realize that you have met your soul mate. And you no longer have any doubts.

You don't have to talk when you're together

You are able to enjoy even silence when you are near your loved one. So, it does not matter whether you are reading while in the same room, driving a car or silently admiring the most beautiful sunset.

You can understand what your partner is thinking

As a rule, the relationship of harmonious couples is so deep that partners can literally read each other's thoughts.

Do you feel your partner's mood?

You know each other so well that when you see your loved one walk in the door after work, you can immediately tell how his day went. You know how your partner is feeling, whether it be sadness, stress, or anxiety. And you are always ready to support him by sharing your optimism and good mood.

You know about each other's shortcomings and find advantages in them

Yes it is! Even our shortcomings are not without advantages. After all, in everything you can find both a positive and a negative side. Therefore, if you love a person, then you probably see in his shortcomings not only minuses, but also pluses. So, for example, stubborn people are able to make the right decisions, and an overly organized person will probably never forget to pay bills on time, and will not remember them when the lights or cable are turned off.

You have the same life goals

You share the same values, ethics and goals. You may have different ways to achieve what you want, but the end result is the same.

You are not afraid of serious conversations

Conversations on important topics can sometimes cause difficulties for partners. But in conversations with your soulmate, you do not have taboo topics. You are ready to discuss all pressing problems until you find the best solution and way out of the situation.

You don't mind your partner spending time without you

Whether it's thrice-a-week football or a Friday bachelorette party with your girlfriends, you respect your partner's independence and privacy. In addition, you know that it is very pleasant to meet even after a short separation.

You are not jealous

Beautiful girls in the office or a nice trainer in the gym are not a threat to your relationship. You are confident in your partner and know that he loves only you.

Do you respect each other's opinions?

As they say, how many people - so many opinions. Often partners in a harmonious pair can be complete opposites of each other. Often this causes certain difficulties. Therefore, it is worth learning to respect the opinion and point of view of your loved one. And then he will do the same. After all, if you do not agree with the opinion of a partner, then this does not mean that it is wrong.

You don't scream or threaten each other with divorce

Of course, we all sometimes get angry at our partner and, willy-nilly, sometimes hurt him with a word or deed. But people who truly love each other always try to control themselves and not hurt their soulmate.

You give in because you want your partner to be happy

Constant concessions in many cases are seen as a sign of an unhealthy, dependent and even offensive relationship for one of the partners. But not in a situation with a truly harmonious couple. After all, the only goal of the partners in this case is to make his soulmate happy.

you know how to ask for forgiveness

Don't just ask for an apology or admit that you did something that offended or hurt your loved one. The ideal partner understands that he has done harm with his words and actions. And even if he considers them justified, but sees that his soul mate is very hurt, he will not fail to apologize.

Would you marry this person again

You know that this person is your significant other. Even in difficult times, you did not think about looking for a replacement for him. You are proud of him.

You complete each other

There are no perfect people. And partners in a truly harmonious pair perfectly complement each other. So, for example, one of them can be an extrovert, and the other an introvert. In the end, they balance each other out.

Being in each other's arms, you forget about stress, worries and anxieties

There is no other place where you would like to be at the end of the day than the hugs of your significant other. If you had a fight with your boss in the office, argued with colleagues, or a car splashed you with mud on the way home, all this will fade into the background as soon as you find yourself next to your loved one.

A beautiful legend, almost a fairy tale, says that there lived people, and they were with two heads and four arms. Strong, whole and courageous, they were so invincible and brave in spirit that the gods became angry and divided people into two halves - a man and a woman. And since then, these halves have been looking for each other in order to find peace of mind and inner balance, looking for their man, their love - the only one for whom he was born in this vast world.

Love is a gift from God, I have always been absolutely sure of it. True love is when two eyes meet and the earth swam underfoot, when touch makes you feel hot, when it is difficult to breathe without each other, it is very rare. Even L. Foucault said that "true love is like a ghost, many talk about it, but few have seen it." It turns out that if God sent you such a feeling, take care of it, cherish it so reverently, as if you have nothing more precious in the whole world. Or maybe not really?

In real life, there are only two positions, two options for existence and one choice - do each of us have soulmates or not?

Option one. There are no other halves.

And indeed, all this romantic nonsense about gods and halves is completely inapplicable to real life. Because we don’t have such a “timetable for the movement of the half”, where it would be clearly stated that “you will meet Lena, Vasya, at the age of 23 on Lenin Square at four in the afternoon and you will live a long and happy life with him.” None of us has any guarantees that this most notorious “half” will meet us at all, and if we do, it will happen at least in the first half of life, and not at 67 years old. Therefore, one must have colossal courage and a completely unrealistic faith in miracles in order to calmly and calmly wait for their man. But most of us do not do this, most of us calmly choose the one who is near or the one with whom you can live at all and calm down on this.

Why not? Not the most stupid life scenario is to choose a worthy person and worthily walk hand in hand with him through life. Well, even if the earth does not float under your feet and sparks do not fly from your eyes, this is real life, not a movie, after all ...
Rational, thoughtful marriages are the strongest, the husband and wife know exactly what they want from each other, build a joint future and spit on all these emotions and splashes from the eyes, why? From crazy love, as you know, there are only problems. The brains are switched off completely and only emotions remain, but how to live with them? No one knew, and still does not know.

Conclusion: there are no soul mates in nature, a person chooses his own life partner, and then calmly, systematically and judiciously builds a stable future and common living space with him.
And just one question, if everything is so correct and rational, what are we looking for all our life ... even in the depths of our souls, without even admitting to ourselves, are we still looking for?

Option two. Second halves exist.

It turns out that there are still such naive girls, even if these “girls” have long passed over “thirty” and it’s scary to say, forty years old, who believe in Fate and soul mates. Some of them are patiently waiting for their only one, others are actively looking for it, and still others make mistakes over and over again, after some time, realizing "that it was not him either." But they all have one thing in common - they believe that somewhere on this earth their only man is walking, the very best, for the sake of meeting with whom you can wait, and seek, and suffer, and make mistakes. Surprisingly, some people really meet HIM, their soul mate, and immediately understand that this is him. And they live with him for a long time and not even always happily, because where there are naked emotions, it happens in different ways. Others, disappointed and tired of waiting, decide that there are no halves and marry "rich and promising." And still others meet their only, true love, but something suddenly does not grow together and they part. And then it remains only to believe that if it was love, then fate will definitely give them another chance.

If you ask me if I believe in soul mates, then I will answer honestly - I used to believe, but now I don’t, I don’t believe. Maybe it's age, or maybe life experience, or maybe my soulmate just got lost somewhere in the dense Siberian forests. Who knows?

Every person dreams of finding their soul mate. Many are simply obsessed with wanting to find “that one” special person. We carefully select the ideal partner until we find at least someone suitable for the template we have invented.
But it shouldn't be like that at all. We have to focus on ourselves if we are ever to find our soul mate. Everyone wants to find happiness, but this dream may not come true if you continue to seek by such methods.
Here are 5 things you may never find your soul mate.
1. You always have a regular sexual partner.
There is a big difference between a casual relationship and a regular sexual partner. Random connections are perfectly acceptable if you are single. They allow satisfaction without obligation. However, having a permanent sexual partner drastically reduces your chances of finding your soul mate.
Why?
Yes, because you sleep with one person all the time, but at the same time you know that he is not “the one”. You continue this relationship just for show, so that there is somewhere to wait out the time until you find "your only one."
As a result, you cannot calmly open the door to a new relationship if your sexual needs are already satisfied. You will not be able to recognize the signals of fate. Of course people need sex. But if you're serious about finding your soul mate, you can't stay with a regular sex partner. By doing this, you seem to close the door to a possible meeting and relationship.
2. You are impatient.
They say things happen when we least expect them. There is some truth in these words.
When we become obsessed with searching, we cease to live a fulfilling life. We do not notice the path that can lead us to a meeting with our soulmate.
You won't find your love by spending all your free time searching online dating sites. You will find him or her when you start to simply live.
Be patient. Perhaps you have not met your soul mate because you have not yet reached the necessary state of mind. This means that you must work on yourself. We need to learn how to be happy on our own and get rid of the burden of thoughts that feed our fears.
When you are ready to love without fear, you will definitely find your soul mate.
3. You do not listen to the signs of the universe.
The Universe always directs us on the right path, you just need to learn to listen to these signs and prompts. Instead, you dwell on the thought that you are probably not destined to meet your soul mate, since you still have not met him or her. Fate gives you hints, directs you on the path that will lead to happiness, but how will you understand this if you do not listen?
Stop and think for a couple of minutes.
Are you currently staying with someone just because you think you can't find the perfect person for you? Are you doing something wrong and realizing it, but don't want to leave because you feel there are no other options?
Listen to your intuition, it is always right. If she says you need to leave, leave without fear. It is destiny that guides you on the right path.
4. You refuse to cut ties with your ex.
You will never find your soulmate if you keep in touch with your ex. It is a fact. It doesn't matter if you're both already dating someone else. If you have already broken up, then this person is not for you. The reasons for the breakup do not matter, whether it is a long distance relationship or a lack of happiness, you broke up - it means that you both decided that you should not continue the relationship. And this is an important sign.
If you were destined to be together, then neither distance nor any other obstacles would interfere with you. If you still believe that an already broken relationship can be returned, you are deceiving yourself. And do not be surprised if one day you realize that you are living in a loveless marriage with the wrong partner, because you already knew that he was not your soul mate.
Don't make your kids suffer future divorce just because you couldn't admit the obvious to yourself and didn't have the strength to end the relationship right away.
5. You have lost faith.
We can all lose faith in something. You may be thinking, “God, I’m 34 now, will I never find my soul mate? I've been waiting so long, and he/she is still gone, and probably won't be."
Of course it won't if you're still busy with your exes, if you're impatient and don't see the signs of fate.
You must believe that fate will give you your soul mate when the time comes. But first understand yourself. If you firmly believe that somewhere in the world there is a perfect person for you, then it is. The Universe gives you this faith so that you understand that such a person really exists.
You should break off unhealthy relationships, start living for real and open your heart to love. Yes, it can be difficult, but you can't lose faith.
You can’t concentrate all your life energy on finding your soulmate, just live and believe, listen to your intuition and you will find the path that will lead you to your soulmate.

All of your girlfriends/friends have soul mates, but you don't? And instead of going on dates, you're stuck in four walls? Yes, you have already been on many dates, but things are not moving forward. What's happening? Why are you unable to build happy and lasting relationships?

If you find yourself single more often than you would like, then you should consider these top 5 reasons why people can't find their soul mate.

1. You are too caught up in being in love.

Each of us tends to get used to certain behaviors. Ask anyone and they will tell you what habits they have that are very difficult for them to overcome. Many people think that addiction only comes in the form of cigarettes, alcohol, gambling or drugs. This is not true. There are a huge number of strong addictions, one of which is falling in love.

Psychologists refer to love addiction as “cocaine fever” and characterize the initial stage of falling in love as follows: “This is a period of intense and very pleasant connection based on mutual fantasies that you and the other person understand perfectly and are perfect for each other.”

Do you like the period of falling in love more than the subsequent development of relationships? After the initial “high” and romantic feeling, do you get the feeling that everything is dissipating and the initial attraction disappears somewhere? If so, then you should notice that after such a development of events, you begin to look for your love again, and the cycle repeats itself again and again.

2. You are waiting for your "one"

Do you have a set of characteristics of an ideal man (woman)? Is he supposed to be tall, sexy and fun? Should she be beautiful, kind and affectionate?

Such a set of characteristics that are mandatory for a future partner can prevent you from finding your true happiness.

But this happens when your expectations are unrealistic. Men, for example, often want to see a woman next to them who looks like a supermodel, and women want their boyfriend to look like Channing Tatum. When meeting you, you always carefully study a person and instantly reject his candidacy if he does not fit your idea of \u200b\u200b"that one". Excessive choosiness is one of the main reasons that prevents you from enjoying relationships.

3. Your standards are too high.

While you may not have much of an idea of your ideal soul mate, you may well have very high expectations for the people you agree to date. Maybe you agree to meet only those men who earn a certain amount per month; or you only meet women who graduated from a prestigious educational institution.

You may think that such standards only help you avoid mistakes and make the right choice, but in fact they only reduce your chances of finding your happiness. Evaluate your standards and try to drop too high demands.

4. You always prove yourself right.

Are you the kind of person who always wants to win an argument? Can you argue until you're blue in the face with your parents, best friend, or lover? If yes, then you should think about the fact that the desire to be always right only repels people.

Of course, no one likes to be wrong. But when you defend your point of view to the last, you are thus trying to get rid of feelings of shame or guilt.

Just think, who wants to be with someone who thinks they're right all the time? Instead of endlessly arguing, it’s better to learn to listen to the other person and calmly respond to his opinion and your wrong.

5. You stopped taking care of yourself.

Have you been single for a very long time and therefore stopped caring about how you look? Unfortunately, this happens very often.
Life without a love relationship in many cases leads to a disdainful attitude towards one's own appearance. You may not even pay attention to the fact that you have noticeably gained weight, that your hair needs care, or it is high time to get a manicure. You may not think about it, but whenever you leave the house, you have the chance to meet someone.

Men always pay attention to how a woman looks. Women also do not care which chosen one will be next to them. We all want our soulmate to be slim, well-groomed and interesting. So if you want to find a suitable match for yourself, do not forget that you, too, will certainly be evaluated.

It's never too late to find true love

So, let's sum up. What do you need to do to meet your soul mate?

First, realizing that you are not with the man or woman of your dreams right now because you still have to work on yourself is the first step in finding the perfect love relationship. You should not instantly fall in love and idealize the first person you meet, you need to get rid of unrealistic requirements for your potential husband or wife, work on a positive communication style in conflict situations and pay attention to your appearance.

Changing your perceptions and beliefs can help you improve your life and see the positive in all relationships. Of course, it is never too late to find your love. People often deliberately put off marriage in order to focus on their careers. And it can give you time to understand yourself and work on any personal issues.

So, instead of feeling hurt and bitter that you still haven't found your true love, start working on yourself and build a good foundation for a long and happy relationship.