Cases for placing a child in a boarding school. The procedure for registration of documents for the placement of a child in an orphanage-boarding school of the system of social protection of the population

A popular scarecrow that parents often use: "If you don't obey, we'll send you to an orphanage," has come true for a teenager from Rostov-on-Don.

Shoved into a boarding school

Recently, the court made an unprecedented decision - to deprive parents of parental rights of their own free will. Mom and Dad, by the way, both with higher education and having three older children, explained their act by the fact that the son skipped school, did not study well, ran away from home, dragged money. And although the child begged to forgive him and take him home, the parents remained adamant. According to their father, they no longer want to be responsible for the boy's actions ...

But much more often parents, who feel that they cannot cope with raising their own child, come up with another option - to send him to the army.

Sergei V., having become a student of a prestigious law university, did not burden himself with his studies. Parents paid tuition fees, so the guy was sure that the diploma was already in his pocket. However, due to absenteeism and tails. To take up his mind, the guy was sent to serve in the army for a year.

Can other people's uncles and aunts give a teenager more than their own parents?

“A situation of powerlessness is normal in any human contact,” says Pyotr Dmitrievsky, psychologist at Moscow State University of Psychology and Education... - This is possible not only between parents and children, but also between spouses, an employee and an employer. At close range, people are intolerable. In such cases, the parents feel a strong desire to get rid of the problem faster. The easiest way at such a moment seems to them to attract an external force, for example, in the form of a militarized structure: "They will make a man out of you there!" Since he refuses to obey them, let him obey other people's uncles. Yes, there are guys who are suitable for training in the cadet corps, serving in the army.

If a child has an interest in paramilitary games, a strict structure, clear tasks, the desire to be in a team, he will probably be fine in army establishments. But I am categorically against this as an educational measure in the case when the interests and characteristics of the child are not taken into account. If the parents, even in the deepest despair, push the child into the army structure, to the boarding school, this deprives the teenager of an important experience - learning to negotiate with a loved one.

Of course, in a crisis situation, an emergency, a child should be able to act without reasoning, obeying his elders. But, if the situation is not catastrophic, such an upbringing system only hurts. If parents feel despair, you need to find the strength to seek help from specialists. "

It's hard to love

“Alienation is a very cruel punishment,” I am sure Kirill Khlomov, Head of the Center for Work with Adolescents "Perekrestok", Moscow State University of Psychology and Education, candidate of psychological sciences. - I'm not even talking about sending a son or daughter to a boarding school. Let's take the most common option - a boycott. In fact, it makes no difference whether to hit the child or not talk to him for three days. He loses confidence that he can be accepted as he is. This instills in him a reciprocal cruelty. Plus, he ceases to feel safe, to feel the reliability of relations with his parents. No child, not even one who tells his parents that he hates them, is born with the idea of ​​harming his family.

A teenager can harm his family when his needs go unnoticed, when violence, punishment, and pressure from adults become intolerable. The easiest way is to punish a child for some kind of offense than to find the strength to calmly understand, hear him, see what his needs really are. It's not about accepting any behavior. We can love a person, but at the same time not accept his behavior. The most important thing is not to treat a teenager like a cattle, which must be taught with the carrot and stick method, but trying to try - yes, it is difficult! - to negotiate and not to deviate from the agreements. Upbringing is not about punishing and rewarding, but about creating conditions in which the child would like to develop. The most important of them is the feeling of a sense of safety and security in relations with parents. "

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How to send your child temporarily to an orphanage?

How to send your child temporarily to an orphanage so that the rest of the children do not suffer. tell

Can I send an infant to an orphanage without abandoning it?

I am a young mother, my son is 7 months old and I do not cope with my duties, can I, without giving up the baby, give the child somewhere?

It is difficult for an ordinary person to imagine what life circumstances can force an adult to think about how to send a child to an orphanage. It is difficult to argue on this topic, realizing that there are no unequivocally bad, scary and angry adults, as well as unhappy and offended children. It is easy to make a decision to place a child in an orphanage if the parents lead an antisocial lifestyle, drink or beat - in this case, living with their own family is perceived as a threat to their life, and the orphanage becomes a salvation. But just such parents do not think about whether it is possible to send a child to an orphanage - they generally think little about children.

It is more difficult to understand what should happen in a relatively prosperous family for a parent to start thinking about this issue. It is worth understanding this not in order to savor the details of someone else's family misfortune, but in order to notice and prevent a problem in your family in time.

Reasons for abandoning a child

There are no ideal parents. In their family, children sooner or later are unhappy with their parents, just as parents would always like to correct something in the behavior of their children. But these conflicts between "fathers and children" do not always become a reason to think about how to send a child to an orphanage. The reasons for abandoning a child can be different - momentary spontaneous decisions that are the result of a violent quarrel or conflict with a child, as well as weighed and accepted as a result of a difficult family situation. Do not rush to immediately condemn such parents (and, as a rule, this is a single mother), there are really difficult cases. Real life sometimes throws up situations that are much more intricate than the most intricate series.

Difficult ups and downs of life

Some people are familiar with the situation - a single mother living in a remote area wants to go to work for her family in a large city or abroad. There is no one to leave the child with, and she comes to the decision: "I want to send the child to an orphanage. Temporarily!" It is assumed that the mother does not abandon her child forever, only until she makes a living. The situation can be aggravated by the fact that the mother may have several children, and one of them requires expensive urgent medical attention.

Return of adopted and adopted children

Sometimes parents have to think about returning adopted children to the orphanage. There is a known situation when adoptive parents took a child into a family with existing native children. After some time, it turned out that the adopted child has a serious mental disorder, due to which he practically terrorizes the youngest children in the family. Moreover, the children, due to their age, cannot resist him, and with adults, the adopted boy behaves adequately. Parents did not rush to immediately get rid of him, on the contrary, they arranged repeated conversations, looked for other methods of influence, which were not crowned with success. Moreover, they themselves have become attached to their adopted son, they are well aware of the psychological blow to the adopted son, returning him to the orphanage can turn out to be, but, looking at the bruises and beatings on younger children, they simply do not see any other way to resolve the issue.

Lack of contact and understanding in the family

Parents cannot always cope with their own child. The reasons for this are different, but the result is the same - the parents have lost their authority and cannot exert the proper influence on the teenager. The latter is aggressive, sees in relatives a threat to his freedom, strives to run away from home, and even grab some of the things, and the parents do not feel safe being next to him. Do they have the right to make a harsh decision for educational purposes, or should they humbly wait for their fate? Each parent answers this question independently in each case. It is not worth waiting for help or advice from others in such matters - this is your personal choice and your responsibility.

What documents are needed to hand over a child to an orphanage

A child is a full citizen of his country. Therefore, if such a decision has already been made, the orphanage will need to provide a package of documents. The main rule is that you should contact the local guardianship and trusteeship authorities, they will provide all the necessary information. Registration of a child in an orphanage is not a one-day process, since this will require a decision of local self-government bodies or other state bodies, and an application form is filled out in the guardianship authorities. The minimum set of documents includes:

  • birth certificate (or passport) of the child. In the absence of those, a medical report is issued, establishing the approximate age of the child;
  • housing survey act;
  • if the child goes to school, educational documents will be needed;
  • information about the parents (parent);
  • an inventory of the property belonging to the child.

Problems of personality formation in children's institutions

  • Cognitively associated with mental retardation. Moreover, this does not mean mental retardation, it is the result of irregular exposure to the external environment when acquiring any skills.
  • In the emotional sphere, caused by the lack of close emotional contacts, primarily with the mother and with peers.
  • In the social sphere, provoked by a lack of experience in the implementation of interpersonal contacts and communication in a team.
  • Sensory sphere - due to lack of stimuli in the auditory and visual spheres.

As a result of these factors, orphanage children are characterized by emotional poverty, a lack of experience in social life, which can only be gained in the family. They have either underestimated or overestimated self-esteem due to the unformed image of "I". Lack of social experience leads to the fact that children cannot find a common language with the people around them, because of this they become rude, distrustful, suspicious, and can start to deceive. They tend to want to separate themselves from the rest, to assert themselves by any means.

Negative consequences of living in child care

Before making a final decision, you need to have a correct idea of ​​how children live in an orphanage and how their personality is formed there. This is a place where children will not be able to develop a stable attachment to a person, to the so-called "significant adult" by psychologists. And without this, according to L. Petranovskaya, a Russian psychologist, teacher and publicist, it is impossible to form a full-fledged personality. Any child should feel a reliable rear behind him, know that he has someone who will protect him.

Living in an orphanage, he sees many adults (speech therapists, psychologists, educators, librarians, cleaners, and so on), but none of them is personally attached to him, and, accordingly, he is not attached to anyone. Feelings of closeness and devotion can only be formed in conditions of separation into one's own adults and strangers. Living life without a meaningful adult, the child is, in fact, in a situation of constant stress and fear. The world around him is not open, interesting and informative, but cold, ruthless and hostile.

Limited personal space

Another fact that characterizes life in children's institutions will tell about what kind of children are in orphanages - the total impossibility of pupils to lead their personal lives. In the orphanage, there is a constant violation of the boundaries of personal space - a common shower, toilet, there is nowhere to retire with your feelings and thoughts. The child gets used to being constantly examined, by adults who are alien to him and by the same alien and not always friendly children.

Lack of a responsible attitude

The problem for the future life of a person who grew up in an orphanage is the inability to learn to take responsibility for his life and his actions. On the one hand, the constant absence of problems with daily worries about where to get food and how to wash dirty clothes makes life easier, on the other hand, the pupil gets used to the fact that someone has to do this work for him every day.

Summing up, we can say that the issue of transferring your own child to an orphanage in each specific situation is always decided individually. Perhaps there really is no other way out. This is a moral and ethical question and everyone answers it in their own way. It is very important that in the case of a positive answer - yes, to give - this happened with the full understanding that the condition for the formation of a successful personality of every child can only be a family. Everyone will agree with this statement - from psychologists, teachers to the children themselves - inmates of orphanages.

In life, unfortunately, there are situations when the parents themselves do not have the opportunity to take care of their own child properly. However, not all of them want to abandon it. Temporary placement of children in residential institutions can be of help to such parents. We will tell you how to place a child in a boarding school without deprivation of parental rights.

Many parents find it difficult to imagine how you can voluntarily hand over your own baby to an orphanage or boarding school. However, for some it can be a real salvation. This is relevant for those persons who, for reasons of a valid nature, cannot fully fulfill their parental duties at a given time. They are given the opportunity to ask for the placement of their children in organizations for orphans, children left without parental supervision.

They cannot be deprived of parental rights for this.

However, this will help protect the interests of the child himself, whom the state will temporarily take care of.

This issue is regulated by the provisions of Art. 155.1 of the Family Code (SK RF), as well as Government Decree of May 24, 2014 No. 481. It is devoted to the organization of the placement of children without parental care in special institutions. The specified document spells out the procedure and conditions for placing such children in boarding schools and other similar institutions.

What is the order

If life circumstances force the child to be sent to a boarding school, then you need to know in what order this is done. Such issues are resolved by the local guardianship and guardianship authority (PLO). To register a child in a specialized institution, you need to write an application, attaching a number of documents to it.

In addition, if the child is already ten years old, then you need to ask his opinion on this matter.

Further, the PLO considers the submitted documents and makes its decision. If there are grounds for placement in a boarding school, then an agreement is concluded between the parent (s) of the PLO and the institution itself. This tripartite agreement stipulates the following points:

  • the period of the child's stay in the boarding school;
  • the order of meetings with parents;
  • responsibilities of parents and institution in relation to the child;
  • measures of social, psychological and other assistance to this family;
  • responsibility for non-compliance with the terms of the agreement.

Parents are expected to abide by the terms of this agreement. In such cases, the deprivation of parental rights does not occur. And after the period for which the agreement was concluded, the child can be taken back.

You can place your children in the care of state institutions for a period of three months to one year.

If, after its expiration, they did not return for the child, then the question of depriving them of their rights and placing the child in this institution for a further time is already being raised. If necessary, you can ask for an extension of this period.

Required documents

In addition to the OOP statement itself, you will need to submit a whole package of various documentation. First of all, these are documents for the child himself. These include:

  • birth certificate, passport (after 14 years);
  • a medical record, a conclusion about his state of health, the results of examinations (analyzes);
  • for children with disabilities (disabilities), a separate conclusion of the medical (psychological and pedagogical) commission is required;
  • for disabled people - a program for their rehabilitation (if any).

Parents will be required to provide documents proving their identity, as well as information about the child's close relatives. In addition, the OOP will conduct a survey of the child's living conditions. Additional papers may be required. This issue should be clarified in the PLO of your city.

Other ways to arrange a child

In difficult life circumstances, it is not necessary to take the child to an orphanage. After all, this can be a serious test for him. You can consider other options that many simply do not think about.

Toddlers of kindergarten age can be accommodated in a five-day (overnight) group. They function in many gardens today. There, your child can be taken care of at night. This option may be suitable for those who work in shifts or work late. In such groups, children do not need to be left overnight, just pick up after the usual six hours.

For older children, sports boarding schools or cadet schools are suitable. Of course, in order to get into them, you need to pass the selection, pass certain standards and exams. However, once they get there, they will be able to study, live and eat there for free.

In the meantime, parents will have time to solve existing problems. At the same time, the child will not think that his parents have left him.

Adolescence begins when the child crosses the border of ten or eleven years, and lasts until 15-16 years. A child in this period begins to perceive the world as an adult, to model the behavior of elders, to draw conclusions on his own. The child has a personal opinion, he is looking for his place in society. Interest in the inner world is also growing. A teenager knows how to set goals and achieve them.

In addition to psychological changes, physiological changes occur during this period of time: secondary sexual characteristics appear, hormonal levels change, and so on.

Teenage problems

Problems arise in adolescents for various reasons. But the following internal conflicts can be used as a basis:

  1. The desire to become an adult, while denying the value orientations that adults live by.
  2. Feeling yourself in the center of the Universe and rejection of it from others.
  3. Puberty and fear of a new self.
  4. Attraction to adolescents of the opposite sex and inability to build relationships with peers.

As a result, it is difficult for a teenager to cope with new violent emotions, and parents should always be ready to support the child or give advice on time. If, in adolescence, in addition to difficulties with changing the body, others are piled on him, for example, the low culture of the parents, alcoholism in the family, the busyness of the parents with their own affairs or work, then such a person can fall into the category of "difficult". For such there are boarding schools for difficult teenagers.

How is the educational process in boarding schools organized?

Usually in special boarding schools for difficult teenagers there are children with big learning difficulties or those who have broken the law not for the first time. To cope with the special, therefore, in these educational institutions, teachers with extensive experience, defectologists and psychologists carry out their activities.

Often, there are also people with medical education on the staff of teaching staff. Iron discipline is the basis of upbringing in a boarding school for difficult teenagers. The main goal is to return the child to a normal outlook and life.

First, the pupils' level of knowledge and intellectual abilities are checked. Verification takes place in the form of testing. If, according to its results, a developmental lag is revealed, a young man or girl can even be taught the primary school curriculum.

The behavior of difficult adolescents is based on psychological development disorders, so students from the boarding school for difficult children constantly communicate with a psychologist. These conversations take place individually. Based on the results, the specialist tries to find the basis - the reason for this behavior of the pupil.

In the boarding school for difficult teenagers, all children are constantly under the supervision of a teacher, and on Saturday and Sunday they have the right to go to their parents, although some stay for the weekend.

Closed and open boarding schools

The named establishments are open and closed. The first of them are similar to cadet corps or Suvorov schools. There is discipline and a daily routine, but children study according to the standard school curriculum (of course, adjusted for mental abilities), and on weekends they can go to their parents. In closed boarding schools, everything is much more serious - there is a checkpoint, and walking in formation, and regular classes with a psychologist. Some pupils in such institutions do not go home on weekends, but parents can visit them on the territory of the boarding school.

Reasons to send a teenager to a boarding school for difficult children

The grounds for entering a special school are as follows:

  • the commission of a crime if the age does not correspond to the onset of criminal liability;
  • age corresponds to criminal responsibility, but the child lags behind in mental development;
  • the teenager was convicted under articles providing for a crime of average gravity, but released from punishment under the relevant articles of the Criminal Code of the Russian Federation.

The Commission on Juvenile Affairs requests the court to send the offender to a special boarding school for difficult teenagers. Before the case is considered in court, the minor is given a medical examination and referred to a psychiatrist. If the parents do not agree to these measures, all procedures are carried out by court order.

Temporary detention centers

Before the court hearing, the child may be sent to a temporary detention center for up to 30 days. This happens in the following cases:

  • when the life or health of the adolescent should be protected;
  • a repeated socially dangerous act must be prevented;
  • if the child has nowhere to live;
  • the offender evades the appearance in court or does not undergo a medical examination.

Boarding schools in St. Petersburg and Moscow

The most famous boarding school for difficult teenagers (St. Petersburg) is a closed school No. 1. The institution traces its history back to 1965. It is located on Akkuratova Street at number 11. This is a closed boarding school for difficult teenagers, which means that children come here by court order. There is iron discipline, movement around the perimeter and checkpoints at the entrance.

There is a boarding school for difficult teenagers in Moscow. Institution No. 9 is located on Zhigulenkov Boris Street in house 15, building 1. Unlike the St. Petersburg one, this boarding school is of an open type. Children with deviant behavior can also get here by the decision of their parents or the recommendation of a special commission. The rules here are not as strict as in closed institutions.

Can Difficult Teens Reeducate?

I must say that the problems of each difficult teenager are different. Sometimes it takes only one month to teach a child to take responsibility for his actions, and sometimes it takes a teenager six months to adapt. Much depends on what psychological problems the boy or girl is experiencing at the moment.

Now teachers are arguing about whether work in boarding schools for difficult teenagers gives results. At the moment, about seventy percent of students in such institutions are significantly improving their knowledge of school subjects. In addition, in such institutions, pupils not only study, but also spend the rest of the time. Thus, problem children create a new one and socialize more successfully in society.

What should parents of difficult teenagers look for?

They defend their independence. This phenomenon affects the child, and it seems that he is acting strange and unpredictable. Be that as it may, this condition is considered absolutely normal and characterizes the transitional age.

Parents of difficult children often face other challenges. A young man or girl has emotional and psychological problems, learning difficulties. A problem teenager often commits illegal acts, unjustifiably risky actions. Depression and anxiety may appear.

There are signs to show that your child is difficult. They are listed below:

  1. Change in appearance. Unjustified weight gain or loss, self-harm.
  2. Frequent quarrels, fights, complaints.
  3. Poor academic performance, sleep disturbances, depression, suicidal thoughts.
  4. The use of drugs, alcohol.
  5. A sharp change in the circle of communication, refusal to follow certain rules, lies, and so on.

The presence of problems in a teenager is the first signal that you need to establish contact with him. Your son or daughter should feel supported, understand that his parents love and accept him in any case. It is important to find common topics of conversation, encourage exercise, and limit TV viewing and computer use. Give your child advice, listen to him, do not show aggression. If you have not coped, seek help from specialists.