Fell in love with your father. I fell in love with my father. Loving dad is not a sin

At a young age, many girls experience romantic feelings not at all for their peers, but for older men. Someone likes movie stars, someone looks at teachers, but something else happened to you: you fell in love with a friend of your parents. Even if he is younger than your father and mother, your age difference is at least 15-20 years, which is a lot. If you fell in love with a family friend, then you probably fear that this will not lead to anything good; worried that your parents might find out about it; finally, you just don’t know whether to tell him about it.

Why do girls fall in love with daddy's friends?

The situation when a girl fell in love with her father's friend is not so rare. There are many reasons for this - you will surely find a suitable one for your situation, and more than one:

• You often see each other, because your father's friend likes to look at your house, you go out into nature together or otherwise spend family leisure. So you had a great chance to get to know him well.
• You make him stand out from other people because he is a close friend of your parents. This gives him a kind of head start - you will always trust him and consider him your friend too, especially if the father often mentions how much a friend has done for him.
• A friend of your parents is most likely a wise, mature, accomplished man. For many girls, the ideal man is their own father, but it is possible that a friend of your family even surpassed your own father. It is not surprising that for you he became an ideal, with whom you would like to be together in the future.

You fell in love with your father's friend: the cons

Yes, there are many reasons for your falling in love, but there are also reasons for concern. Chances are you get excited when you think about these things - or maybe some of them didn't even cross your mind. Carefully study this list and think about whether you are ready for such consequences of your parents?

• Even if your father's friend has a reciprocal sympathy for you, it can end badly for both of you. First, your parents may not like your relationship very much. The father may consider that a friend has deceived his trust - this is where their many years of friendship will end. Also, the negative consequences will affect your relationship with your parents - they will begin to trust you less.
• Relations with a friend of your father will bring even more risky consequences if you are under 18 years old. Under the law, any of his sexual actions towards you will be considered violence, even if you yourself provoke him to it. Are you ready to “set up” a friend of your parents in this way?
• If you fell in love with your dad's friend, who is now 30-40 years old, most likely he already has a wife and children. In this case, you better moderate your feelings, you don’t intend to destroy someone else’s family, do you? Even if your father's friend is already divorced, having a child will not be easy for you to put up with. Are you ready to become a foster mother for other people's children? We think not yet.
• A friend of your parents probably remembers you as a child and, most likely, does not even perceive you as a girl. You are unlikely to be able to break through this wall - at best, your attempts will cause him a sympathetic smile, because for him you are still a little girl, even if you are already 20 or more.
• Finally, don't forget the age difference. While you don't know your father's friend so well, you only see him when he is talking enthusiastically with your parents about his business. The circle of his interests and communication may turn out to be completely alien to you, and yours to him.

You fell in love with a friend of your parents: the pros

However, if there were nothing but cons and dangers in your situation, then no girl in the world would ever build a happy relationship with her father's friend. But there are such examples, and you too can become one of them. If the cons from the previous section didn’t scare you, then perhaps this list will give you even more confidence:

• The experience of a relationship with an adult man can be very useful for you. Some girls feel much older than their years, and communication with their peers is simply not interesting for them. If you understand that you are already ready for a serious relationship and can share the thoughts and feelings of a mature man, why not try?
• If they are really close friends with your father, then this man will never give you offense. He will feel personally responsible for everything that happens between you, and will literally blow dust off you - because if you are not happy in your relationship, then he will feel guilty before your father.
• Many girls are afraid to admit to their father that they fell in love with his friend, but not all parents will take this news with hostility. Someone, on the contrary, will be happy for a friend and daughter - after all, for your parents this is a very close person, and perhaps they will be happy to know that you love each other.

What to do if you fall in love with a family friend?

Let's summarize. If you are under 18 or if your father's friend is married, then you should not even think about any development of relations. Use this love as an indicator: let the adult man that you like now be the standard for you in the future, and look for someone similar to him among your peers. However, if you are already an adult girl and feel that a relationship is possible between you, then the possible reaction of your parents should not scare you. The main thing is to make sure that both your feelings and the feelings of your chosen one are really serious, that this is not a fleeting hobby, caused only by the fact that your father's friend spends a lot of time in your house. In this case, frank explanations are best avoided so as not to embarrass the relationship between your parents and their friend. But if, after reading all the pros and cons, you continue to believe that you will succeed, take a chance, and perhaps this love will stay with you for life.

Beta: fun house
Characters: Andrey / Lyosha
Rating: NC-17
Genres: Slash (yaoi), Humor, Everyday life
Warnings: Incest, Profanity
Size: midi
Number of parts:
Status: in progress

Description:
Lyosha is an ordinary teenager who does not want to admit that he is gay. But his biggest problem is that he fell in love with his own father, whom the guy had not seen before because of his parents' divorce. And, to his great horror, he learns that he must live with Andrei, his father, in the same house for several months. For Lesha, this is a real torture, because you can’t show your feelings ...

Temptation...

My heart begins to beat faster, and I notice how thoughts gradually get confused in my head. No, I'm not stupid enough to act like this in front of Andrey. But now, sitting next to him on the bed, I realized that a little more, and I would start smiling stupidly, talking all sorts of nonsense, although I usually talk nonsense, but right now it will be out of topic. Oh, how off topic. God forbid, I'll start talking about how I behave in the morning.
- Listen, Lyosh, I think we should talk, - Andrey's face became more serious, which could not but alert me.
- About what? - slightly frowning, asked him.
- Well, for example, about the fact that I'm your father, - he said with a shrug, looking at me carefully. - As far as I know, your mother did not talk about me before, because of which, most likely, you still do not believe that it is I who am he. After all, now I'm just a stranger to you.
- Yes, somehow it doesn’t make much difference to me, - I lied, looking away a little to the side. “I’ll only live with you for six months anyway, and then I’ll return home again.
- Well, don't say that. I tried for a long time to get the opportunity to see you. And now, when she appeared, I don’t want to lose her just like that, - his face is concentrated, and his voice is firm and serious. - Therefore, I hope that even after Oksana returns, you will come here at least sometimes. For now, let's just try to mend our family relationships. I don't have any kids besides you, so I'm a little out of the loop on how to deal with kids, but hopefully we can sort this out.
I was really a little surprised by his openness and the fact that he is not afraid to admit that he does not yet know how to behave with his son. Maybe that's how I imagined him. Cheerful and cheerful, but when it comes to a certain problem or conversation, Andrey immediately becomes a serious person with a great mindset, who is able to make the best decision, even though it may seem risky. After all, usually, fathers prefer to look like tough men in front of their children, although they are not like that, and Andrei so easily showed his weakness, and this caused me only positive emotions.
- Well, so how? Let's try during this time that you will be with me, to improve the relationship between father and son? Andrey asked with barely noticeable hope and a smile on his face, holding out his hand to me.
I thought for a while, because now most of all I wanted to see him as little as possible, because one day I might not restrain myself and somehow give myself away. But even so, there were positive aspects that I could easily use, because of which, after thinking a little more, I nevertheless shook his hand in agreement.
“Okay, but like you said, you are a stranger to me now, so I want to know more about you,” I made a condition, barely suppressing a smile. If everything goes well, then I will be able to achieve what I want in time, even though it will be risky. In any case, I will hope that Andrey will simply not suspect anything and will not kick me out of the house after he speaks out that he is disappointed in me.
- Of course, but you tell me about yourself, - the man grinned. - And yet, maybe you will call me "daddy"? he asked with some hope in his voice.
- No, I will call you Andrei, - he answered instantly, watching his slightly drooping face.
- OK. And so it will do, ”he answered somehow, not particularly joyfully, although, apparently, he was not going to get upset because of such a trifle either,“ after all, I already have an adult son, ”having said this, he cheerfully patted me through my hair, getting out of bed. - I want to go to the shower now, and then let's go to the store?
- Come on, - he nodded in response, after which, closing the laptop and putting it on the nearby bedside table, he got out of bed and went to the closet. - I'm going to take a shower too.
- Then we'll meet downstairs in half an hour, - Andrey said after some thought, after which he left the room.
I wasn’t going to wash for a long time, because in the evening I wanted to sit in the bathroom longer, so, quickly grabbing ordinary black jeans and the first T-shirt that came across from the closet, I wandered to the shower stall.
Whatever you say, the shower is the best place to think. So what do we have at the moment? Firstly, the son is in love with his father, and this, most likely, is not a simple love, since this feeling has haunted me for several years and comes to the point that Andrei often dreams of me. And, of course, the dreams in which he appears do not differ in particular propriety. Secondly, I sometimes think about him when I masturbate. In general, everything is serious here, and I hope I don’t go crazy.
Further. Next we have Andrei, that is, the father. By himself he is a very intelligent and cheerful person, in any case, he seems so to me, but I, however, still know too little about him. Perhaps, a little later, he will reveal to me other traits of his character. In general, Andrey just hopes to find a common language with his son. And even in such a short period of time, I noticed that he was glad that he had a son. Although, there is nothing strange here, because he has not seen me for seventeen years and he knows about me, most likely, even less than I do about him.
For me, the situation is hopeless. I have no doubt that he is natural. For a long time I did not think about what kind of orientation I myself had, preferring not to notice barely noticeable glimpses of interest in guys. I understand how my friends would react to all this. But when I spent a few hours with Andrey, I realized that I just wanted him terribly. Does this mean I'm gay? Don't know. Maybe not. Moreover, I do not want to upset myself to the end, trying to figure out which gender I like and which is indifferent. For several years now, only one person has been important to me. And now I am destined to live with him for six months. I agonized over the fact that he was a man for a long time, but if you come to terms with this, then the fact that he is my straight father will remain a much bigger problem.
And so I came to the conclusion that this is all crap. I'm at a dead end. No exit. If in the morning I thought that I could avoid him, now I want at least banal touches. And this is only the first day! Damn, why am I so unlucky?
After getting out of the shower, I quickly dried off, then dressed in new things and put my hair always sticking out in different directions in order.
Taking with me only the phone, I quickly went down to the first floor, but Andrei was not there yet. He probably hasn't gotten around to it yet. So what should I do? Maybe just wait? It is possible, but it will not be interesting at all. Smiling slyly, I stood for a while, thinking, after which I slowly went to look for Andrey's room. It was not so easy, especially considering that I don't know the house yet. But his room was definitely on the ground floor, since after my arrival he briefly went in the opposite direction from the kitchen, where, most likely, the room I needed was located. And I was not mistaken, because to the right of the living room along a small corridor there were only three rooms, and rustling was heard from one of them.
I knocked on the door and went inside without waiting for an answer. And almost immediately he froze in place, wide-eyed. Andrei was standing next to the closet, taking off his shirt from the hanger, and, by the way, he now had only a towel wrapped around his hips. Gorgeous, Lyosha, now you definitely hit it. And don't stare at him like that! Damn, this is so hard. He definitely goes to the gym, because such a body cannot be just given by nature.
Without even realizing that I was staring at him with might and main, I only felt a small electrical discharge pass through my body, and my breathing became intermittent for a moment. His flat stomach, slightly pumped up arms and narrow hips were simply mesmerizing. Damn, how I want it. I need to come up with something, because I definitely won’t be able to restrain myself, so I need an option where I don’t have to blush for my behavior. After all, different circumstances happen in life and, if everything is done correctly, you can find a way out of any situation. Even from mine.
- Lyosh, why are you frozen? - Andrei asked a little surprised, from whom, of course, my presence did not disappear. - Wait a bit, I'll get dressed and let's go.

My name is Natasha and my mother is Svetlana. As far as I can remember, my mother and I lived alone, I didn’t even notice male friends with her. My mother devoted her whole life to me.

True, I was born when my mother was only twenty years old, and I never knew my father. As a child, I secretly dreamed that we would have a complete family, like other children, and that we would all go to the park to ride the carousels, and then to the ice cream parlor ...

I asked for the first time about who my father was only when I was already thirteen. Mom reluctantly replied that something didn’t work out between them and dad, and he left somewhere far away even before mom found out that she was pregnant. I didn’t ask anything more, realizing that this was an unpleasant topic for my mother.

After school, I graduated from college and quickly got a job. I had a medical specialty and they took me to work in the therapeutic department as a nurse on duty. For some time I got used to it, and then somehow quickly got involved in the work, as if I had been here all my life.

One day, an interesting man of about thirty-five appeared in our department. From his conversation, it was immediately clear that he was not a local. It was written on the map that the place of his main residence was some kind of northern city. I really liked Sergey, even though he was much older than me. It was clear that his charisma conquered women's hearts at first sight, I was not the only one in our department who fell for the bait of this man, all the nurses in the nursing room only whispered about Sergey.

Once, on my shift, Sergey approached me with a request:

- Natasha, my doctor forbade me to go downstairs, but I really want to drink tea. You could not go to the store for a package of tea leaves.

Sergei handed me the money, and at that moment I looked directly into his eyes for the first time, and realized that I had truly fallen in love.

- No money is needed, I will treat you to tea, if you will, I have tea leaves ... and boiling water too ... and even sugar ...

- Thank you, Natasha! You just saved the most unfortunate patient!

Sergey and I laughed, and a few minutes later we were drinking tea together right at the post. We started an interesting conversation and soon we switched to "you". Sergei really lived in the North for a long time, and in our city he had relatives whom he decided to visit, because he had not seen them for almost twenty years.

Over the next few days, we talked with Sergey on the phone, if it was not my shift, but on my shift we spent a lot of time together. When checking out, Sergei presented me with a huge box of chocolates and invited me to meet outside the hospital.

We met on the same evening in a cafe and I felt that Sergey also had some serious feelings for me. He walked me to the house and was very surprised to find himself in the courtyard he had once known.

- And what is your apartment number, Natashenka?

- Fifty five! Second floor, right.

“Did you say that you live with your mother?” What is her name?

- Svetlana. do you know each other?

- I don't know yet. Natasha, please tell me your date of birth?

After I answered this question, Sergey's face changed. He stood in silence for a few minutes, and then seriously asked:

— And your father? Where is he? Sorry for the inconsistency...

“I never knew him. Mom says that he went somewhere far away before I was born.

- Is your mother at home? Let's go to her soon, it seems to me that now you will learn something interesting ...

We hurried to my house. Mom opened the door, and when she saw Sergey and me, she lost consciousness. I quickly gave her medical attention and brought her to her senses.

Serezha, is that you?

- Yes, Sveta, I ... Natasha - my daughter?

- Yes, it happened...

I stood dumbfounded by this news. Falling in love with Sergei disappeared in an instant, I saw this man from the other side, I had a father who never was. And Sergey suddenly said to me:

“Now I understand why I was so drawn to you, daughter…

It turned out that Sergei was younger than my mother, he was not yet seventeen when they fell in love with each other. The father's parents were against such a relationship and took their son with them to the North, where they worked then. Sergey did not know that his beloved was pregnant.

Naturally, now it was already impossible to return the past. Sergei had a wife and two children there, in the North. But he was very happy that he had found an adult daughter and thanked my mother very much for leaving the child and for raising such a wonderful me, his daughter, alone.

Name: Lisa

Not so often and not so rarely in the world there is such a problem as mine. I am a young girl, I am 19 years old, my parents are divorced, but I have a good relationship with my father and mother. They never gave me any attention. It so happened that at the beginning of summer my father and I went on vacation. His friend (35 years old) and his family went with us, there is a daughter and a wife. At first glance, he seemed to me a simple man, a good friend of my father and nothing more. After a couple of days, I began to notice that I was starting to like him. I just didn't want to step away from him. She always and everywhere went with him and her father when they were going somewhere together. In addition, we all rented the same house together, and therefore it constantly flashed before my eyes. When we were in the same room or at the table, no matter where, I simply could not take my eyes off him, although I understood that it was not decent, especially when his wife and my father were sitting next to him. Couldn't help it. I began to notice that he somehow looks too long into my eyes, as if guessing that I have feelings for him. If we were alone, or when I spoke to him, his voice became more (excuse the expression) erotic, alluring, gentle, serious, attentive - simply charming. I looked at him and realized that if I was holding back, I was overwhelmed with hitherto unknown feelings. Then I began to notice that he also looks at me in a special way, smiles when I laugh at his jokes. He is a very reserved person, but with a good sense of humor, so I always had fun around him. I understood that I had to be more careful, because my father was nearby, I didn’t worry about my wife, their relationship was very bad, they didn’t respect each other and hadn’t been intimate for a long time (according to his wife), she talked with me a lot and often complained about him, in general, they will soon have a divorce, according to her, even in the house they slept in different rooms.
Once, in the evening, my father and a friend sat down to drink, my wife and daughter went to bed, and I sat down with them (not to drink, just sit, laugh). They got a little drunk (it happens to everyone) and my father went out into the street. I was left alone with my father's drunk friend, he was silent. I thought of talking to him, asking him, taking an interest in him, his work, his well-being. When he spoke, his voice changed again, and he began to look at me with such a look, well, just beyond words. It was as if he was flirting with me, although I was the initiator. I complimented him, and he was pleased, but again held back, as if trying to keep me at a distance. And always when he complimented me, he apologized to his father, he was cautious again. This time he somehow talked more, asked questions, answered mine, we got to know each other much better. After that evening, I noticed one more thing. When I wanted to go somewhere with my father and his friend, my father did not want me to go, but my friend insisted that I go with them.
Before leaving, it so happened that a friend of his father met a friend, and they wanted to meet in the evening, go somewhere. Before the meeting, my wife felt bad and she didn’t want to go (she never likes to go anywhere with her husband at all), my father was also not eager and my father’s friend suggested that I go with him. Of course, I agreed, but I was stupid and asked my father if he could still go with us (so as not to arouse suspicion), this time my father unfortunately agreed, his friend suddenly looked at me very disappointed, as if offended by me. When we went to the meeting, he didn’t talk to me all the way, didn’t look like I wasn’t there at all, he was very offended by me. And when his friend came with his girlfriend, we went to a cafe, sat there, my father talked a lot and was generally in the center of attention. I asked him something, in general, I talked to him a couple of times separately from the company, and it so happened that his friend was sitting alone, without attention. I looked at him, but I didn’t receive any response, his usual views, and suddenly I noticed how he demonstratively took the hand of a friend’s girl and kissed her (hand) and made a couple of compliments to this girl. I suddenly, very unexpectedly, became jealous for myself, and so much of her (this has never happened to me). I had a napkin in my hands, and I tore it, probably out of anger into many pieces, a friend of my father noticed this. Until the end of the “banquet”, I did not look at him at all and did not pay attention, was silent, did not say anything, my mood was spoiled. When everyone parted (we went home in our direction, each other and his girlfriend in the other direction), we quarreled on the way with dad, slightly, he offended me with words, with all sorts of teachings, and I went home, offended, behind my father and his friend. Passing by one restaurant (from where the light music came from), my father began to dance, well, to cheer me up, then a friend suggested that I dance, grabbed my waist and all that, well, I pulled away (it was somehow uncomfortable and not the time to dance, on the street where a lot of people pass). In general, it somehow hurt him and I began to comfort him, well, to say there that I would dance, but not now and not here. And I comforted him too excitedly, he smiled softly at that. On the way, my father stepped aside and when he came up, it so happened that a friend was walking in the middle. Well, between me and my father, and suddenly he took my hand, and I don’t even know, it looked like regret, as if he was asking for a petition for making me jealous. His hand was very warm and I was very pleased to hold hands with him, but when my father began to say something, he suddenly abruptly pulled his hand away. In the following days, I began to notice how he is often in my company, looking for a moment to be around, but also as if so as not to arouse suspicion. Well, in the end, when we returned home, he was silent all the way and when I asked him something, he answered very coolly, although the day before that everything was fine, maybe, of course, the point was that his wife was there, I don't know.
Well, after this vacation, we didn’t see each other for half a summer, but every day I thought about him, sometimes I asked my father about him.
I recently met him again at my father's birthday party. He had not yet divorced his wife, but he did not particularly remember her. It so happened that at one moment we were alone, I noticed that he was somehow sad, as if he felt bad, as if something was eating him from the inside (I noticed this during the rest, but was not interested) and decided to ask if it hurts If he had something, he answered very incomprehensibly, that is, strange. He said that his heart hurts, that he just burns. I asked if in the literal sense, he said it, and he said, “I think you understand in what sense” and as if he wanted to touch and hug me, but suddenly dad appeared and he abruptly recoiled.
I want to ask for advice, what should I do? With reason, I understand that nothing good will shine for me with him. I understand that if we suddenly succeed with him, then, firstly, both his and my relationship with my father will deteriorate. He hasn’t divorced his wife yet, but I don’t want to fight off my husband, I don’t have such an upbringing, and relations with an adult man are not safe, for my part, I’m a young girl and now I have one wind in my head, I will like him, maybe love will grow out of falling in love, but I probably won’t be able to be with him for a long time, because over the years he doesn’t get younger, and neither do I, but I don’t want to ruin my youth. But it’s impossible to stop thinking about him, stop wanting him, the mind says one thing, the feeling and the heart are different, and it’s very hard for me, because he is the first adult man whom I became so interested in and whom I also seem to be interested in somehow. I feel good with him, I have fun, I'm interested, he is strong, persistent, he is my ideal. What I am looking for in my soulmate and I seem to understand from the outside that I can spend an unforgettable, very bright and pleasant time with him, in general I don’t know what to do at all. Help with advice, please.

As a child, when I was three or four years old, my mother “had” a laconic but interesting conversation with me. I told her that I want to marry dad, and she said that it was impossible, because mom is his wife. I cried so much...

Many years later. And I realized that my words were not empty. I love my own dad. He is my most ideal ideal. He has all the features that I like in a man. Why is there no such combination of traits in others? Maybe everyone stubbornly hides this combination?

Dad understands me like no one else ...

He is my best friend, the best person. I have no secrets from him. I tell him everything, I share everything in the world. I even tell him things that they don't seem to tell dads. Mom just went to another, and left me with dad. And this is how I am arranged: I share everything that excites me, that gnaws, that worries.

I'm jealous of another woman

Mom left, dad found a woman. How jealous I am of her! I hate her! I wanted to somehow move to my mother so as not to meet this lady, but as it turned out, my mother does not need me at all. She arranged her life. And in her life there is not a bit of free space for me. I'm not offended, but I'm surprised. I am her daughter! How can you violate all the rules of decency towards me? At least I, in relation to my own daughter, would not do that.

If I explained why I so want to “run away” from my dad, my mom would most likely turn me in to a psychiatric hospital or somewhere else. And my friends don't know anything at all. I'm afraid to say anything. Being in my place, it is unlikely that anyone would “sculpt” anything on this topic.

Loving dad is not a sin

But only if love for him is natural, and not like mine. I reproach myself, but there is no strength not to love dad. I love…. He is the best of the best.

I don’t understand why my mother exchanged him for another. I saw the “other”, but I did not manage to understand why it is better. If he is better off financially, that's nonsense! More of a show off than anything else.

I came home one day. Papa slept soundly. I covered him with a blanket, looked at him and went to my room. Cry. Cry and don't sleep. For probably more than four years now, I have only done that I didn’t sleep and roared into the pillow. Tears saved only the soul. And then - sometimes. Dad saw my tears. I made up the reasons for their "flows". And each time they were different from the previous ones. I didn't want to lie. But my truth is worse than any lie. He won't understand! And I can't stand his misunderstanding or laughter.

I'm going to live with a friend

She has a spacious three-room apartment. One of them is for me. I'll be better there. I will be visiting my dad. Because the person who lives with him infuriates me. Why am I not her? The funny thing is that I consider her a rival. Stepmother! What makes love...

If there were wizards, I would go to them for help.

And so - I have to “nurture” everything in myself, hoping that this “everything” itself will lag behind me. And it doesn't even think about it. How I suffer, hating myself and all this unjust world! Cigarettes, coffee and music. They distract me more or less from all thoughts. What they are - I will be silent so as not to lead readers into a state of horror.

Dad teaches me how to cook. He does it well and with pleasure. I love watching his hands move. His hands are beautiful... By the way, I want to paint his portrait. But he won't agree. If from the fact that they are trying to photograph him, he begins to get very angry - drawings and portraits can be canceled immediately. And I would take my father's portrait to a friend's apartment. Let him be with me at least in the photo or on my creation.

Honestly, I once drew my father when he was sleeping sweetly. He doesn't know about it of course. The portrait painted by me, I hid in my hiding place. I will not describe in detail where my hiding place is, because I am afraid that he will read my article sometime. There are things you can't know!

I got lost on the internet...

I searched the Internet for answers to my difficult questions. Met only one condemnation. Well, why so? Why is there so much injustice and cruelty in people? I do not deny that they (cruelty and injustice) live in general in every person. I don't require anything special.

I just ask: “turn over” your views, dear people! Soon dad will marry the one with whom he lives and then I will have a half-sister (judging by the ultrasound). No, I won't hate her. She is my sister, although only half my own. My dad is very happy. And I, seeing this, become even happier. When he's happy, it's good for me. My love is my problem. I'm not going to run from her. This is an unrealistic solution. I will leave love to develop into ordinary affection. It is necessary to live correctly, and not as you would like ...!?

Walking all alone, I managed to think about a lot ...

I felt superfluous in my father's life and in my mother's life. A sister will be born - I will go to my girlfriend, as I wanted. I will come when I need to help my father's woman with babysitting. I will do it with love and with pleasure, because I love kids. But seriously, I dreamed about my sister for a long time. The truth is better if she was born from my "common" parents.

Feeling hatred for Irina, I already love my “future” sister. As if she is my own daughter. Because she's probably daddy. Here's what I thought. Parents are not chosen. So - sisters or brothers - too. I must rejoice in happiness even when I am overwhelmed with suffering. Difficult, but nothing is impossible. This is not a read truth, but a truth that has come over the years. If a man wants to achieve a goal, he will achieve it if he tries. And his personal qualities will help him in this.

I write, not believing what I write, but I write what I feel. Well, screwed up! Worried, most likely. There is no way to keep calm. Here, anyway. Love love love…. She did not come in the way I expected to meet her. But she came and did not ask if I wanted to see her like that. She is cheeky. But impudence is happiness, living at number two.

I dulled the pain with a liter of coffee. Then cigarette smoke. Then - sleep. But I do not forget reality: I return to it in order to change everything.

I fell in love with him

My feelings