Youth and beauty 

Should a child of 8 years old understand the time. Parental involvement in the development of an eight-year-old child

The age period in a child's life from 8 to 11 years old is very important, because at this time a person's personality is formed. If we operate in terms of high science, then it is in the described time period that the process of secondary socialization begins and the transition from concrete thinking to abstract thinking.

Here, a subjectively comprehended image of one's own “I” is created. The child looks at himself with your eyes and, depending on your assessments of his personality and behavior, draws conclusions. “So, my mother praises me, so I am good.” Or vice versa. “Today they scolded me again, they said that I was a worthless child ... I’m bad!” Stereotypically thinking parents hardly pay attention to the possible difficulties and problems of the little man, considering them small and insignificant. “And what is there to worry about, - stretching in an easy chair, says dad with laziness, putting aside the newspaper, - nonsense, real troubles will begin at the age of 13-15”.

Parents do not take into account the fact that the strength of the psychological explosion at the time of puberty is inversely proportional to the presence of attention on the part of moms and dads, and is directly proportional to the degree of indifference. Your child should trust you, share what he accumulates during the day in his soul, talk about his small victories and defeats: how he slept today, what he dreamed about, what they told about in a history lesson, etc. they love to come up with different classifications and typologies, they divided all dads and moms into authoritarian, liberal and "golden mean".

The most common mistake authoritarian parents make is their penchant for punitive parenting. One should remember the eastern proverb: "Children need to be brought up so that their tears in childhood do not turn into your tears in old age." If a child does not do well at school or is desperately hooligan, do not rush to grab the belt or put your ignoramus in a corner. Perhaps he wants to get your attention. Perhaps something worries him, saddens or frightens him.

Each problem has several causes, as well as several solutions. First, try to find out exactly where the "black hole" is. Does the child fail in subjects? Feeling lonely? Is he being bullied by peers? Does he never find contact with the teacher? Maybe a few troubles immediately fell on your boy or girl? And he (s) does not know how to be. Try to get your child to trust you. To do this, create a favorable psychological climate in the family. Of course, in the life of two adults, everything happens: quarrels, scandals, and a banal everyday showdown.

Make an effort to keep your child growing in the most harmonious environment possible. Nothing traumatizes a fragile child's psyche like screaming, angry criticism and aggression, even if it is not directed specifically at him. Make it a rule that as soon as your son or daughter crosses the threshold, love and tenderness should shine on your face. Supporters of the authoritarian model of upbringing may object, stating that "there is nothing to pamper children, let them temper from childhood, because life is a jungle, and sherkhans survive there." One can object to such a tirade. You must raise a child not only smart, strong and strong-willed, but also kind. Only a hard-hearted parent can leave his baby alone with trouble. A child at this age absorbs, like a sponge, everything that happens around, in order to then give it to others, including you and your grandchildren. Learn to endure, forgive, and believe. Show your baby that there is no such misfortune and fear that cannot be dealt with.

Parents who adhere to authoritarian parenting methods seek to suppress the child, punishing literally all wrongdoings. Children raised in such conditions do not know the difference between their good and bad behavior. Among this conditional audience, the percentage of those who are disadvantaged is the highest, because from elementary school age they have a stamp in their subcortex: “If they scold me, then they do not like me. Does it make a difference how to behave. " Psychologists dealing with children talk a lot about the difficulties of the transition period, when the spirit of contradiction is strong in the adolescent and it comes from the “opposite”.

At the same time, respected experts forget that the spirit of contradiction does not appear in a certain period of time and does not disappear. It is either there or it is not. Perhaps voluntarism and conformism are at the genetic level, in some children self-will manifests itself externally, in others such behavior is observed much less often. If you put pressure on a child, squeeze him in a rigid framework, sooner or later your child will begin to very actively make numerous attempts to defend his rights, and in a very unpleasant form for you.

However, there is the complete opposite of authoritarian parents, that is, parents are liberals.

They provide children with maximum freedom, never scold, do not punish physically, preferring to rant about what wonderful kids are races here in their friendly families. The child has an increased sensitivity to the words of mom and dad. He perfectly understands when you can stand on your head, turning the whole house upside down. It is difficult for parents to punish their beloved prankster, but it will be even more difficult then to teach him to be responsible for his actions.

Imagine that in old age, instead of paying your own bills for medicines, you will have to give your blood savings for entertainment and pay off the debts of your dearest child. Remember, raising a child is a long process, somewhat similar to boating: to move against the current, you need to row with a vengeance. So why not find an approach to your undergrowth and go with the flow? This style of upbringing has many names, and we diagnose it as "restrained", or "golden mean". By analogy with the managerial style of management, I would like to call it situational. But it is not the style itself that can be considered as such, but an approach that presupposes a quick response and maneuvering, depending on two components: your goals and the child's behavior. First, in order to raise your child correctly, try to develop purposefulness and willpower in yourself. Secondly, it should be scolded for really serious misconduct. If your little son flew a kite with his friends in the spring and got very dirty in the mud, it doesn't matter. And if he tortured a neighbor's puppy or threw stones at a bird with a broken wing, this is already a reason for a serious conversation. Third, what to do with such a phenomenon as children's lies? Should it be considered a vice or an innocent fantasy? The child often composes to appear more important in the eyes of parents and peers. Such behavior is an outward manifestation of infantilism, a kind of defensive reaction of childhood. But, if with age the daughter or son continues to lie, take your attention on this, try to understand the causes of the phenomenon and seek help from a child psychologist.

Parents rarely turn to specialists, believing that such consultations are more needed by unbalanced adolescents or those with pronounced mental disorders. In fact, any difficult situation requires outside intervention. It is quite problematic for a mother or father to abstract from the subjective assessment of their own child, it does not matter whether it is overestimated or underestimated. In addition, sometimes they themselves need the advice of a psychologist. To the question of a professional: "Why do you pay so little attention to the child?" most often the answer follows: "Time is short, I work, I do not have time ..." Yes, time pressure is not only a problem for Russian society. Abroad, the voices of specialists in child psychology are heard louder and louder, appealing to the conscience of parents: "Take care of the children!" But there is a very weighty argument for those who are raising a child in an incomplete family. If a student has only a mother or only a father, then it is difficult for an unhappy parent to be torn between life, work and children. An incomplete family is both a consequence of the sexual revolution and a manifestation of a rebellion of gender self-sufficiency. There is a widespread stereotype: they say that the institution of marriage and family is withering away, which means that children will need to be brought up somehow in a new way. It is not known what the opponents of the traditional family, who mainly grew up with one parent, are guided by. Probably, they are driven by a feeling of belated psychological self-defense: the remark was too offensive: "You are fatherless!"

A child needs a complete family. He must have before his eyes a positive example of the relationship between a man and a woman. Your children will build their model of communication with the opposite sex by looking back at you. Young adults most often choose a mother-like spouse. In the same way, girls are looking for a betrothed, resembling a father.

The conclusion from what has been written is simple: if you are just going to start a family and are planning to have a baby in the distant future, and you are reading the article solely out of interest, then approach the issue of marriage or marriage with full responsibility.

According to official and unofficial statistics, the peak of divorces of married couples occurs just at a time that formally coincides with the childhood age described here. What about, say, a 9-year-old child when he learns from adults or angry peers about the upcoming changes: “We heard that you will soon have a new dad (new mom), and then brothers and sisters will appear!” The psyche of a junior schoolchild is obviously harmed, which is aggravated if he hears to his questions at home: “This is none of your business! Small yet? " If you are currently dating someone and are not sure that it is with this person that you can live without special conflicts for many years, then do not rush to have children and formalize the relationship. Remember, your kids will pay double the price for your mistakes. And yet, spouses often break up, and families fall apart.

How to be in this situation? Talk to your child; sit him next to you and say: “It so happened that your dad (your mom) will live in a different place. But he (she) loves you and will come to visit you. " Do not hide the fact of divorce and subsequent final separation from the child, otherwise you will undermine self-confidence, the child will be offended by you more than ever. Not for your new love, but for a banal lie. If, for example, you met another person and broke up with the child's father, then remember what you should never do:

1) impose your new companion on the child;

2) forcing a daughter or son (boys react more strongly) to call a stranger dad, your behavior will be regarded as a betrayal.

The question arises: should the child be allowed to visit the father, who has arranged his life with another woman? Liberal psychologists unanimously repeat: "Yes!" But in practice, this is not always the case. On the contrary, after a divorce, relations between former spouses end, leaving nothing but unpleasant memories. Most often, the father visits the child for some time, overcoming the resistance from the ex-wife, and then the visits become more rare and shorter. In the near future, dad has a baby from another wife, and his attention goes there. No matter how the parents of a younger student live, together or separately, they should not forget about their son or daughter.

Set aside time for your child in the evening, play your favorite game with him, read a book or watch a good movie. Observe the baby carefully, try to understand what area he is seriously interested in. Try to instill interest in your hobby.

If you love skiing, it will be great if your child also wants to learn how to ski.

Double benefit: both under supervision and good for health. If the kid has chosen a different hobby, there is nothing wrong with that. Why don't you try to instill a love of books? Remember what books you read as a child? Perhaps among them were the classics of Russian literature and the works of foreign authors. Here are some of them:

1. Tales and stories by Alexander Pushkin (from "Ruslan and Lyudmila" to "The Captain's Daughter")

2. "Mumu" I. S. Turgenev and his other stories

3. The famous "Haircut Skrip" V. Astafiev

4. Myths of Ancient Greece (legends about Hercules, Argonauts. Trojan War)

5. Legends of the Ancient East (the story of Osiris, about Gilgamesh and Enkidu, etc.)

6. Slavic mythology (about mermaids, goblin and brownies)

7. Legends of the Middle Ages ("Tristan and Isolde", "Knights of the Round Table", "Young Roland", "Robin Hood").

8. Works by H. Wells "War of the Worlds", "The Invisible Man"

9. Yu. Belyaev "Amphibian Man"

10. V. Dragunsky "Deniskin stories"

11. N. V. Gogol "Evenings on a farm near Dikanka."

The list of books on offer can be expanded depending on your personal taste and the interests of the child. If your child does not show interest in literature, take the book in hand and read the passage with feeling, with sense, with understanding ... Then discuss what you read with your child. If he is interested, then a reaction will follow. No answer? Then decide on a little exploration, gently ask him about what you heard. The result of your efforts may be different: either he is not attracted to books at all, or the baby prefers other works, in the first option, take measures to interest the child, in the second, find out what the little man likes.

Does your son want to read Jack London? Do not impose on him the works of Alexandre Dumas. Otherwise, he will either abandon books altogether, or wander aimlessly down the street in search of trivial adventures, or endlessly watch TV. Try to instill in your child a love of art. If he reaches for a brush and paints, then pay special attention to his hobby. Present him with a gorgeous album and a set of paints, show how you are interested in his work. Go to a painting exhibition with your son or daughter. Maybe your child is interested in theater? Or does he try his acting skills, dress up in adult costumes, and make something himself? Some children hide completely innocent hobbies, fearing that it will not be approved by their moms and dads. Trust us, it is better for your child to read, sew, paint, and burn wood than to sit all day in front of television screens. Special mention should be made of the dangers of the latter fun. First, damage to health is caused: vision deteriorates, hearing deteriorates, and the back becomes bent, because at the time of watching an exciting film, the baby does not monitor his posture. And lying on soft pillows provokes scoliosis of the cervical and thoracic spine. Secondly, psychological trauma is inflicted on an immature person. The abundance of frankly indecent scenes and violence on television creates an incorrect picture of the world in a child. We must not forget that the media are agents of the child's secondary socialization, they influence the choice of priorities, to some extent stipulating the future scale of values. As you can see, it is created long before puberty. Just at the age of 13-15, provoked by the awakening sexuality to dubious feats, young men and women are poorly aware of their behavior. The concept of what is good and what is bad is established in the interval from 8 to 11 years. Thirdly, the skills of social adaptation of a young personality are laid in the gap described by us: how to communicate correctly, how and with whom to be friends, which should never be done. Spending time in front of a blue screen or at a computer, boys and girls lose their sense of reality, the environment is visualized for them, and the mythical reality obscures the world. This is fraught with a number of negative consequences: a growing person loses a sense of the genetic danger common to the entire species of Homo sapiens: children's fear of alcohol, drug addiction, and substance abuse decreases. Addictions not only negatively affect the growing body, but also have a mutating effect on DNA, since nicotine and other harmful substances penetrate deeply into the structure of the human gene. So, mothers who smoked in early childhood give birth to children either with defects of internal organs, or significantly lagging behind in development. Take care of the health of your grandchildren now, see how your son or your daughter spend their free time.

After the crisis of seven years, a relatively quiet and balanced period of life begins. Child psychology 8-9 years old is very interesting and has many features, because right now the child's individuality is being formed and he begins to feel like an independent person.

Physiological peculiarities baby at 8-9 years

Now the child continues to grow intensively (height and body weight are changing), the body proportions continue to change, and preparations are underway for puberty. The body remains childish, quite sensitive to everything around it. At the same time, a personality is being formed that wants to be more independent. Children need proper rest, so you should correctly create a daily regimen, which will take into account the time for sleep and rest, so that it is easier for the child to cope with the increase in school load.

It is impossible for the study to take up all the free time of the child, as it requires a sedentary way of spending time. Do not delve too deeply into the workflow, but do not remain indifferent either. The body grows intensively and develops rapidly, and without sports many difficulties arise, headaches, blurred vision, and decreased immunity are possible. Therefore, parents definitely need to take care of their child's two-hour daily walks, as well as sports.

Do not assume that your body will have enough physical education lessons, which are given two to three times a week. For full development, sport must be present every day. The bones and muscles of children grow and form, which means they need constant movement and stress. If you cannot provide your child with sports sections, then just teach him to do light exercises several times a day.

Psychological peculiaritiesbabyeight-nineyears

At this age, the personality of the child is intensively formed, and he wants to be independent. During this period, it depends on the parents what their child will be like in the future. For many mums who are used to keeping everything under their control, a difficult stage comes. Until that moment, everything was very simple for the child: mom will help with the lessons, grandmother will iron the clothes, dad will wash the shoes. And now the moment comes when you yourself need to do many things. After all, it is very important that the child begins to make decisions on his own and do without outside help in everyday life, and the parents, in turn, simply observe and direct a little. Therefore, be patient and build your relationship with your son or daughter very carefully.

Don't forget, a child at this age is primarily a child. He likes it when adults and peers around him pay attention to him, so he tries to attract him in any way. It seems that he perfectly adapted to school, took his place in the team, got used to the requirements and a difficult schedule, found contact with the teachers and elders who surround him. But, the mental state is not yet stable enough.

It is during this period of life that many children begin to get involved in collecting (pebbles, stamps, gum stickers, magazines, etc.). Take part in this in every possible way, this will help you to be closer not only as a parent with a child, but also as friends.

Eight- nine years – advice to parents

By the way, while the child is under your influence, you have a unique opportunity to teach him to respect his family and elders, school and peers, to explain that the opinion of mom and dad must be taken into account. Take a close look at the children, those whom the child chooses as his friends, because in the future he will move away from you, and it is those friends who will have a huge influence.

Age 7-8 - one of the turning points in the development of a child. Whether a child starts school at six or seven, at some point he goes through a crisis. This period can begin at the age of seven, and may shift to six or eight years. The crisis of seven years, which is called the period of the birth of the social "I", is associated with the child's awareness of his place in the world of social relations, the opening of a new social position - the position of the student. The formation of a new position changes self-awareness, and this, in turn, leads to a reassessment of values. What was significant before becomes secondary. Old interests, motives lose their motivating force, they are replaced by new ones. A small schoolboy plays with enthusiasm and will play for a long time, but play ceases to be the main content of his life. Study becomes the leading activity, it is during the educational process that new psychological functions and qualities arise and develop. The development of the personality of a younger student directly depends on the effectiveness of studies.

  • During this period, profound changes in the field of experience also take place. Individual emotions and feelings that a child of four years old experienced were fleeting, situational, did not leave a noticeable trace in his memory. Failures and unflattering reviews about his appearance, for example, if they brought grief, then did not affect the formation of his personality (provided that the situation in the family was favorable). During the crisis of seven years, a "generalization of experiences" appears, thanks to which the logic of feelings appears. Experiences acquire a new meaning, their complication leads to the emergence of the child's inner life - it is the inner life that begins to influence the behavior and events in which he actively participates.Now the child thinks before acting, he has an awareness of what will bring him the implementation of this or that activity - satisfaction or dissatisfaction. Psychologists call this process the loss of childlike spontaneity. The child begins to hide his feelings, tries not to show that he is feeling bad; outwardly, he is no longer the same as internally, although openness will still remain throughout the primary school age, the desire to throw out all the emotions on peers, on close adults, to do what you want. Antics, demeanor, artificial tension of behavior usually become a crisis manifestation of the separation of the external and internal life of children. These external features, as well as the propensity for whims, emotional reactions, conflicts, begin to disappear as we get out of the crisis and enter a new age.
  • The first grader is undergoing a restructuring of the entire system of relations with reality. The child has two spheres of social relationships: "child - adult" and "child - children". At school, the child-adult system is divided. In addition to parents, another significant adult appears in the life of a schoolchild - a teacher. It is the relationship with the teacher that begins to determine the relationship of the child to parents and children. The new system of relations "child - teacher" becomes the center of the life of a first grader. At first, children try to strictly follow the instructions of the teacher. If the teacher allows loyalty to the rules, those rules are destroyed from within. Each of the children begins to relate to the other child from the position of how his classmate relates to the rule introduced by the teacher. Snatches appear.In relationships with peers, children learn patience and cooperativeness. Communication with peers is very important for the formation of the ability to take the point of view of another, to accept this or that task as a common one, requiring joint action and the ability to look at oneself and one's activities from the outside.
  • In children 6–8 years old, the development of the skeleton, articular-ligamentous apparatus, and muscles is intensively going on. The child's musculoskeletal system, which has not completed its development, experiences great stress when, during the period of study, it is necessary to maintain a static posture for a long time. Incorrect long-held posture leads to poor posture. The spinal column is very sensitive to deforming influences of various kinds, therefore, an improper fit can quickly lead to gross changes that disrupt its growth, the differentiation of all its structural elements.At this age, the small muscles of the hands are still poorly developed, the ossification of the phalanges of the fingers and wrist bones is not complete. Therefore, when writing in the classroom, complaints are heard so often: "The hand hurts", "The hand is tired." The imperfection of the nervous regulation of movements explains the insufficient accuracy and speed of the movements, difficulties in performing movements on the basis of a signal. When performing graphic techniques in children of this age, the main control belongs to vision, and at the same time not only the "field of activity" is recorded, but the entire movement is traced from beginning to end. Therefore, it is easier for children to write and draw large letters, large shapes.

  • In preschool childhood, the long and difficult process of mastering speech is generally completed. By the age of 7, the language becomes a means of communication and thinking of the child, and in preparation for school - and the subject of conscious study. A large active dictionary allows you to switch to contextual speech, the child can retell a story read, describe a picture, etc.Perception becomes meaningful, purposeful, analyzing. It highlights arbitrary actions: observation, examination, search.
  • The memory of a 7-8 year old child develops in two directions - arbitrariness and meaningfulness. Compared to preschoolers, younger students are much more attentive. They are already able to concentrate on uninteresting actions, but their involuntary attention still predominates. For children of this age, external impressions are a strong distraction; it is difficult for them to concentrate on incomprehensible, complex material. The attention of first graders is characterized by a small volume and low stability. They can concentrate on one thing for 10-20 minutes. A 7-year-old child thinks figuratively, he has not yet acquired an adult logic of reasoning: only by the end of preschool age does a tendency to generalize, to establish connections appear. The emergence of this tendency is extremely important for the further development of intelligence.
  • Summarizing all of the above, we can say that 7–8 years is the age of active formation of arbitrariness in all spheres of the child's mental life.

The editorial office of Montessori.Children was asked:

Is it possible to re-educate a child of eight years old or is it too late? He is spoiled, reluctantly fulfills the requests of his parents, he should always be forced to do the elementary things: do not forget to brush your teeth, take a bath, learn lessons, etc. The boy is 8 years old. We bring up the second child, daughter, according to Montessori articles - at 2 years old, already independent. Thank you in advance!

Olga Seletskaya, Montessori teacher at the Otrada Moscow Medical Center (AMI 6–12), answers the question of how to teach a child to be independent.

"Is it possible to re-educate a child of eight years old or is it too late?"

Education is an ongoing process that lasts a lifetime. Even adults change over the course of life. We are influenced by the people around us, circumstances, life challenges. Therefore, it is never too late to have a positive impact on the child.

How to raise a child of 8 years old

High self-esteem is the main condition for the development of a sense of responsibility and independence in a child.
How to raise self-esteem in an eight-year-old child? Children feel significant when adults take the time to talk to them. Frequent communication and discussion of different topics helps in developing self-confidence.

Ask about his friends and the activities he enjoys. Share the best and worst episodes of your life. Ask what he liked the most about today? What were the difficult moments? Let your child feel that it is possible and necessary to share negative feelings and moments of life. This makes it clear that there are positive and negative situations in life. Open, friendly and honest communication with the child creates a close, long-term bond between parents and children.

How to raise responsibility in a child

Responsibility is the ability to make the right choices and be aware of the consequences of your actions. A responsible person cares about the well-being of others and understands that everyone plays a significant role in the arrangement of the world around them.

Responsible behavior for an eight-year-old child is expressed in the following:
- independently prepare for school;
- keep your things in order;
- help adults around the house;
- be an assistant in school affairs;
- keep order in your home and yard;
- take care of plants and animals;
- to help younger children and the elderly;
- report to the appropriate authorities about emergency or dangerous situations on the street.

To foster responsibility in an 8-year-old child, responsibilities must correspond to his age. Self-care habits develop gradually and under parenting guidance. If the child is disorganized, reproaches and categorical instructions will not lead to success.

The reason for the child's failure to fulfill his duties may be too generalized parental requirements: "put your things away", "get ready for school tomorrow." Break these requirements down into more specific ones: "pack your backpack - what do you need tomorrow?"

The mode of the day and the responsibilities that the child is endowed with in the family give him clarity on what to expect at any given time of the day. In the morning he takes a shower, brushes his teeth, dresses and has breakfast. In the evening, he collects a school backpack for tomorrow, prepares a uniform for training or other circles after school, takes a shower, brushes his teeth, reads before bed.

The family should be allowed a certain amount of time to watch TV or use the computer. The total time spent in front of a TV or computer should not exceed two hours a day.

Responsibility and independence means that the child knows the boundaries of what is permitted. If a child breaks the rules, explain simply and concisely what the child did wrong and what the consequences could be if these rules are not followed.

Tell us about what is happening in his body, if he does not brush his teeth, show pictures of teeth affected by caries. Tell us how pathogenic bacteria get from the cavity of an unclean mouth into the body, spread through the blood, and affect the functioning of the heart, liver, and kidneys. Awareness of oral and body hygiene motivates the student to practice hygiene.

Talk to your child about the hormone melatonin, which is released during sleep. Why is it important to go to bed on time, since the activity of the hormone melatonin begins at 9 pm. Why is it important not to sit out, not to miss this moment, so that the sleep is of high quality. It is necessary to cultivate a healthy lifestyle, to explain to children the importance of hygiene of sleep, work and their own body.

Assign your son with certain household chores:

Set the table for a family dinner;

Tidy up on your desk and keep your belongings in order;

Feed pets;

Throw dirty clothes in the laundry basket.

Praise your child. Praise the effort, not the result. You will see how his self-esteem grows as these responsibilities become a habit for him.

Responsibility of the student in learning

The most common complaint from parents is that the child cannot bring himself to sit down to do his homework. Establish rules to help your 8-year-old child fulfill his school responsibilities.

Start by organizing the student's classroom. It should be away from TVs and other distractions. When your child needs to start doing their homework, turn off the TV. Eight years is not yet the age when one can expect independent concentrated homework from a schoolchild. Parents have a great role to play in eliminating distractions. Therefore, it is permissible for a child to do their homework at the kitchen table, in the presence of an adult who prepares food.

Establish a rule regarding smartphones: when a student is engaged, the signals of the phones switch to silent mode. Modeling such behavior is extremely important for a child - he feels the support of others and their respect for learning activities.

Together with the student, prepare his desk for work: there should be no unnecessary items on it, the table should be well lit, and all the necessary items should be at hand so that the child does not need to be distracted and get up from the table.

Schedule home activities with your son. Set up fifteen-minute breaks every 30 minutes. Make sure the room is well ventilated. Hang a large calendar on the wall of your son's room, along with a list of household chores. Children get satisfaction when they can check or put a sticker in front of a completed task.

While the child is doing his homework, it is better to sit next to him and do his own thing: the family budget, pay bills online, etc. This will make the child feel that he is not alone with his responsibilities. In addition, you simulate a focused and attentive attitude towards the tasks at hand.

What to do if the child does not obey the parents

"He is spoiled, unwillingly fulfills the requests of his parents, you should always force him to do the elementary things: do not forget to brush your teeth, take a bath, learn your homework, etc."

Why does an 8-year-old child not obey? Here we are dealing with "ignoring" behavior - the first time a child "does not hear" what adults are telling him.

First you need to understand the reasons for this behavior. Most likely this happens because adults repeat the requirements several times and the child is simply used to not reacting to words.

Establish a rule - you need to ask to do something once.

In your case, when you see that the child is not responding, use the technique of "involved leadership". Don't let your child ignore your request and go about their business. Approach him, kindly say that you understand his feelings: he wants to play a little more and it’s a pity to part with his toys. By expressing an understanding of the child's feelings, you thereby put yourself on his side, tune in to his wave.

Then kindly explain to the boy why it is necessary to stop doing what is required (time to go to bed or time to sit down for homework). In a friendly tone, discuss what the consequences of not meeting the requirement (unlearned lessons, sleepy child) could be. Then offer to participate in the fulfillment of the requirement: "Let's go together and see what needs to be cleaned up on the table to start working on your homework" or "Let's go choose which book you would like to read before bed."

“Ignoring” behavior is common and requires great patience and wisdom from an adult to correct it. It is important to make the boy feel that you are not in confrontation with him, but support him in the need to cope with his duties.

Remember that the development of the independence and responsibility of a child at the age of eight is not an isolated process, but only part of an integrated approach to the upbringing of a personality, a system of values ​​and habits.

Illustration: ru.p