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Relationship is difficult. To understand this, you do not need to be seven spans in the forehead. Despite the fact that there is no clear guidance on how to behave in relationships, there are things that men in romantic relations with other men should avoid. Yes, some of these useful tips are suitable for all genders in any respect, but many of them concern exclusively gay / bi men. So, here they are: 27 things that gay / bi men should never do in healthy relationships.

1. compare yourself with him

When you are in heterosexual relationships, to compare ourselves with a partner directly more difficult. But if you meet with another man, it's hard not to compare ourselves with your chosen one. Nevertheless, try not to do this. From this will not come out good. You are two different people with different strengths and weak sides. His body may be better than yours, but you are kinder. He can earn more money, and you can help more people. You need someone who balanced you, and therefore will always be what your boyfriend is better than you that is absolutely normal.

2. Compare it with former

Compare a new guy with the former is a bad lesson. He should not be similar to those who were before him. They became former for some reason. And you clearly do not want to meet with a guy exactly look like your former. That relationship came the end!

3. Allow homophobic comments from family members

Some of you can come from a homophobic family that calls your sexual identity of the "style of life". They can also make you other homophobic statements. Healthy single-salted pair does not tolerate family homophobia. If someone from your family gets your partner with inaccurate statements, impart for him.

4. Jealous to random guys

It's hard not to jealous when the guys get acquainted or flirt with him, and not with you. Because of this, you feel less attractive of you two. And even if it is so, what? This means that you are meeting. This means that you like you not only because of the appearance. This means that you truly lovely a man!

5. Lit about your aspirations, needs or desires

Do not say that I agree to open relationships, if it is not. Do not argue that you are not looking for anything serious if this is exactly what you are looking for. And on the contrary, they do not hurt because of fear to hurt him. Do not say that you want a serious relationship, if you do not need it. Be honest in what you want from him and from your relationship.

6. You can say no

It is surprisingly difficult to say "no", especially those who are dear to you. (Unless you are bitch, then it is probably not so difficult). But in the relationship it is very important to say "no" when you feel uncomfortable.

7. Do not reciprocate in sex

You should be generous lovers, and make a pleasant and partner. Relationships with a selfish lover never fold (if this is not a special bdsm practice).

8. Subscribe It

Rare jokes can roll, but constant ridicule is no longer funny. Constantly putting a partner in an awkward position or to downgrade it in front of friends.

9. Make it hide orientation

Yes, sometimes there are circumstances when the boyfriend asks you to hide your orientation in front of an elderly homophobic grandmother on the verge of death or because of something in the same spirit, but in the remaining 95% of cases, he should not ask you about it. To get out of the closet, he needed years. And it was difficult. You demand too much from your partner if you ask him to hide the orientation even for a short period of time.

10. Squash to stop communicating with friends

This is one of the forms of manipulation and violence. Some men use their vulnerabilities, needs and tears to make you do something that you need. For example, stop communicating with friends to spend more time with him. If this happened, finish the relationship. He manipulates you.

11. Jealous when he communicates with other guys

Or, if we reformulate: you can jealous, but do not be angry and do nothing reckless. Better talk to him about it, especially if he has a habit too clearly flirt with guys. But remember, he is also a person. There is nothing wrong with that he looks at someone as long as it does not go into something more.

12. For a long time to hang in the phone

This is rude and very bored. Of course, if you both lie in beds, hang on the phones and do not communicate, then there is no problem in this. But for dinner or when he is trying to tie a conversation with you, leave the phone alone!

13. Make him read your thoughts

I had a guy who told me: "I want you to guess what I want." How? Quir-guys have a lot of skills, but reading thoughts in this list is not included. Do not expect anything. If you need something and it is important for you, let him know. Be concrete, be frank, be honest.

14. Give contradictions to strengthen the scandal

I can not even convey words as I am to blame. Try not to save negative emotions. If something upsets you, you need to say about it so that it does not accumulate in you. Otherwise, this will lead to the fact that you will get angry because of a trifle, because I have accumulated too much negative towards your boyfriend.

15. Talking to him in a bad tone

Disagreements happen. We make mistakes. But in spite of everything, no matter how angry you are, you must do with him respectfully. This means that you should never talk to him in a bad tone, no matter how annoying you are.

16. His discomfort

It seems obvious, but it is not as simple as it seems. Sometimes due to the fact that we cannot refuse (see clause 6), the partner pushes us to something that we are unpleasant to do. Do not be such a partner. You need to know if your boyfriend is difficult for you to refuse. Do not abuse it. Try to do on the contrary - to make sure that he felt comfortable and safe, as you know that it is difficult for him to refuse.

17. To remember him everything during a quarrel

A quarrel or dispute should be composed of one thing. Or did you do something wrong, or you are inclined to do something that I do not like. The theme of the conversation should be something one. Do not remember him every trifle that he did not and which is not related to the problem. If these little things do not suit you either, leave them for another time to sort it with them.

18. To prohibit him to communicate with former

I was not sure, add this item or not, but it seems important to me. I do not communicate with the "serious" former. I am friends with many guys with whom I met / slept, but not with those I loved and with whom I had a serious relationship. In my opinion, nothing good comes out of this. It is difficult for me to go forward when I communicate with very close to the ex. And honestly, I have enough friends. But many guys are nevertheless friendly with the guys with whom they had seriously met. Lucky! You should trust your partner when he says that they are with former friends. You can't forbid him to communicate with former. You do not have rights to it. You can express our doubts about this (for example, you know that his former loved to manipulate and refer to their friendship with caution), but you can't make him do something.

19. Blaming him in everything

Not everything around his fault. Sometimes it is your fault, and sometimes no one is to blame. There are in the life of grief. Do not blame him in everything that goes wrong.

20. In secret use of sex applications

This applies more to the beginning of a serious relationship, exactly when you recognize him closer. Do not use these applications when you are with him. To be honest, I used to do it myself. Checked Grindr / Tinder while it was in the toilet, to check if another guy wrote me. Be in the moment. Grindr can be checked later when you are sitting in the toilet yourself.

21. To lie to him about his sexual activity.

All gays know that sex can have risks for health. Do not give him about his sexual behavior. Do not say that you sleep only with him, if it is not. Do not say that you are engaged in secure sex, if you like to end unfamiliar guys to you.

22. Use your weakness to keep it

This is a classic sign of manipulation. Use your vulnerabilities to make him do something for you. It is cunning and manipulatively. Do not be a terrible partner.

23. Allow romance to die

Another reason why you should not skip the evening dates. You don't want romance to leave. Do not forget about cute trifles like flowers, comments on how well he looks and recognized in love.

24. Require sex / content with mediocre sex

Do not require sex. Do not be satisfied with mediocre sex. If one of you is not in the mood, do not have sex. Wait when you both will want it. Not very pleasant to have sex only to satisfy the partner. This leads to mediocre sex for both of you.

25. Avoid vulnerabilities

Be open. Be honest. Everyone is scary to be vulnerable. There is always the opportunity that you will digest him, and he will not accept you. However, it is worth risking. Without vulnerability, this relationship will not be released.

26. Mix desires and needs

Something we want. And something we need. Do not confuse these concepts. Do not require what you want and not be satisfied with what you do not get what you need.

27. Forget why you meet him

At some point, the relationship you will undoubtedly be very difficult. Just so arranged relationships. Never forget why you meet with him. I don't forget about his positive features about what you fell in love with him.

For your life, I was in love with the natural numbers countless times. In the youth, like many teenagers, I loved experimenting and ripping my nerves, and it was a great way. With age, I began to wonder: how many hetero guys were in love with me? +

When I speak about in love, I do not mean sexual attractiveness. Lovely, I mean everything that we see in films or read in books: a storm of emotions, butterflies in the stomach and everything in this spirit. Can this meet between men of different orientations? +

Personally, I think it is possible, but it is difficult to choose the exact name of this phenomenon. Lost and sexual attachment as itself cannot be called synonyms. Lyubility or even love is a connection between souls, not bodies. I do not know how best to describe it, and whether it is possible. +

Tactile contacts between men and women have a big difference: women when meeting with the help of touches can express their feelings, and the society will not pay attention to it, and if it concerns men - the Society will condemn. In my own experience I know that you have to keep the distance and hide emotions, so that nothing to give yourself and not compromise the partner. +

I often see male friendship, and this is something unimaginable. In colleges and after them there are all sorts of fraternity that are sometimes like a family or even better. So at that moment, when natural starts relationship, his first instinctive thought, grafted by society: "I'm now gay?". +

When it comes to love, there is no difference between naturals and not natural. The floor does not play any role in this, you need to get used to the fact that Race, religion, and everything else is nothing compared to love. +

When I studied in college, I fell in love with natural. He was beautiful, but besides that, he was an excellent interlocutor, with whom I could have spoke up to several days without stopping. I also liked him. There was a strong connection between us, which can be called love, but another important aspect remained. +

I had to know what our relationship means for him. I was confident in my feelings, but he did not say anything about it. We did not know what to do with it. We were not sure that we feel the same thing, so I wanted to place all the points above and in the shortest possible time. +

Love is one of the few things that cannot be explained. She arises unexpectedly, and you never know who you will fall in love, in gay or natural. +

It is very difficult to survive when you are in love, and a person does not respond to your feelings. When this happens, it is often suited to stay friends, but it is impossible: when one cannot be without the other, and the second because of this feels awkward, it stifles any relationship. +

When you fall in love, you must understand whether it is worth it. You must be ready for a conversation not from pleasant if you still understand that this is what you want to fight. +

Natural can love Gaya, I know it from my own experience. But it is worth putting a question: do you have a future? +

Especially if you are one hundred percent heterosexual

The question of homophobia worried me for a lot of years. Being a person enough free looks, I never condemned anyone for what is happening in his bedroom. But still, the attitude towards gays as somehow slightly unhealthy people did not go anywhere, which did not relate at all that gays, which I met, were often smarter, interesting, educated and stylish than their "home-building" Member between legs.

Having delighted into the question of the gender and reading a couple of books supported by scientifically proven facts, I took for myself that the floor modifications are caused by genetic mutations and that it is possible to "correct" this, just breaking the psyche and life to a person. I accepted gays as they are born, calmed down and began to actively communicate with them, without regard to conventions and prejudices.

And then a miracle happened! I realized that it was better to be friends with gays - it was the best thing to happen to me, not counting the decision to hire a housekeeper instead of daily torture washing the dishes. My friends, to be friends with gays, is helpful, to be friends with gays are fine, everyone is friends with gays. And that's why.

He will teach you style. Gay perfectly understands that you are not him. Gay does not want to climb into his pants to all the oncoming men, while he knows what a woman wants, including how the man should look like, to enjoy the woman. Therefore, on the shopping of Take your friend Stas.

He will solve all questions with lists, invitation, closed parties, exhibitions, shows, prepretaries. Gays rule cultural life - accept this. Just ask Serge, if he has a penetration in L8 Park.

With a friend-gay at a party can be drunk to any beautiful and inaccessible girl. After all, he was already dressed correctly, led to a closed party, and now it is already running to hug with her, which has just arrived from Paris from Saint-Laurent. Just be an idiot, do not talk about our masculinity and heterosexual at a party to the party. Hug her, kiss on the cheek, praised the dress, laugh, have fun, jealous more than ever in life. She will allow you anything. After all, it is so interesting - to sleep with gay.

Gays do not drink beer. This is personal.

If you have a girlfriend, your friend gay loves with herWhen you need to work, relax from it, close its needs to communicate with other men.

Gays are the best psychologists. Do you have accumulated in the shower drilling sensual inexplicable something? I have no one to pour out the soul, do you want to cry from experiences? Call the coste. Select on the landscape, buy a bottle of rose and arrange a session of psychotherapy.

From gay never carries.

Gays read books. That says it all. The most valid, educated, creative men, whom I met, usually turned out to be gay. With them you can discuss the new Movie Sorrentino and argue about which of the subchanits seven seven.

And remember, only a man knows how to deliver the maximum pleasure to a man. If you suddenly ever understand what you like, as his bristles concerns yours with a welcoming kiss on the cheek, just hint at him.

Editorial opinion may not reflect the views of the author.

Do not miss:

Gay men gladly friends with women. They communicate with them, adopt the habits and manner of behavior. In addition, gays love to discuss with girlfriends new fashion, diet, beauty guidance procedures. They read women's magazines together, discussing the problems of mutual relations of men and women. Gays will learn in the team of girlfriends a lot of new things and share their knowledge. And they pay attention to representatives of strong sex, which are spinning near beautiful girls. Perhaps among them the representative of the alternative orientation will fall, which will react to the sign of attention and become a permanent partner.

Gay men are often very touchy. They see their dissimilarity on the rest and strongly complex. Therefore, when communicating with them you need to be careful in statements.

How to be friends with a man-gay

Each girl must decide for himself, how close you can start a man of unconventional orientation into your life. Often gays become loyal and devoted friends, but still they are not quite a man and you should not expect certain behavior from them. Gay is unlikely to call to help build a closet, convey heavy shopping, repair the car. But he will gladly listen to the history of unfortunate love and give advice on that parting. Or share techniques with which you can conquer any man. Girls do not make up gay competition due to the fact that they are interested in the representatives of the traditional orientation. Therefore, they easily share with them the most intimate male secrets.

Gays quickly find a common language with girls, but friendship with men of traditional orientation is almost impossible. Therefore, before you get acquainted a friend, Gay with other friends, weigh all the pros and cons.

With men, it is very convenient to go to various entertainment events. On the one hand, there is always a relatively strong shoulder, a friend of the girlfriend can hold home or play the role of a lover to dump the Uhager who did not like. On the other hand, if a really decent man meets, gay will not be against the girl began to communicate with him. Therefore, recently very often in clubs, restaurants, you can find girls in the company of men gays at exhibitions. Such a union is convenient both, and often friendship continues for many years. As long as the girl does not appear the cavalier, which promotes the Institute of Traditional Heterosexual Family.

Is there a friendship between a man and a woman? Probably, every at least once thought about it. It seems, what could be the difference of what sex is your friend? You either comfortably with him or not. But most often such friendship, ultimately leads to bed. This connection does not have to lead to the end of friendly relations. However, friendship can grow into something big. From a male point of view there are only two options in friendship between the sexes: when there were friends former lovers, and when a woman and a man and a man are friends. Moreover, men hurt if women proudly say: ". A man will still be jealous of his half to her friend. No matter how cool, but they both men, no one canceled rivalry.

In case of friendship after love relationship, everything is simple. The feelings are cooled, and communication continues in a habit. Moreover, if this pair managed to live together, they should not know each other better and can give standing advice. They can be united by friends, children, work. But how to explain friendship with a man of unconventional sexual orientation? "My friend is gay" is a frequent phenomenon in the modern world.

Girls like to communicate with gays because they do not feel inconvenience with them. Friendship with a guy - gay can be stronger friendship between girls. Ladies tend to seek their own, rivalry often leads to the completion of friendly relations.

Friendship with gay - sincere friendship or tribute fashion?

Recently, in foreign cinema increasingly there are increasing cases of friendship of the main characters, women and a guy - Gay. What lies for such relationships? Girls who are looking for a friend of an unconventional orientation guy, suffer from a hidden complex of inferiority. Either it does not suit her personal life, or it is completely absent in her life.

"My friend is gay. What gives me this friendship? " - On this question in the psychology of human relationship there are several answers. The girls increase the feeling of confidence in themselves, begin to feel full. Nature laid the desire for proximity to the opposite sex. With a guy - they get gay. And at the same time, such a friend will never encroach on the holy - freedom.

It is believed that friendship with gay delays. Such relations as a drug. Once upon a time talking, I want to continue. The guy - Gay regards the girl as a girlfriend, he tessifs her pride, says compliments. And such feelings will be only a gentle manifestation of friendship, and not the way to "ride".

Remember: If you still originated more strong feelings than friendship, to a friend - gay, to re-educate him in a good husband is almost impossible. Gays Polygamans, Cunning and windy. If you do not have a sharp feel of property and jealousy - dare!

Relations without jealousy

Men - gays are characterized by honesty and sincerity to women. For them, the girl will never be a rival or an object of desire. He will not gossip behind his back, as they can do "the best girlfriends", will not want to lead your boyfriend. Also gay good advisers in the fashion plan. He can honestly say, you are outward or not, advise when choosing a set of underwear. But it will not ask to lend a favorite dress or decoration.

Even the most common "gray mouse" will not be addressed next to the most beautiful guy - gay. They are not competitors, but just good good friends. A man - gay can reveal the secrets of a strong sex, give the necessary advice, as it should be in a relationship.

Friend - Gay hardly wakes up the girls to the girl, which means that it will be a strong friendship for a long year. But do not forget that there are cases when gays change their orientation and then everything can be. But if you have a feeling for a friend, you have to make a lot of work to prove your superiority to men.

Unconventional orientation as a cover

Many men can not prove the harmlessness of friendship with gay. They do not trust gays and are constantly jealous. But do not forget if the man suffers from pathological jealousy, then there is no matter who your friend. Disputes will be in your pair constant satellites.

In justifying men, let's try to imagine how you would lead yourself in a situation where your man would have worked as a car surrounded by a lesbian pleasant appearance. If you are unpleasant, think that you constantly have to endure your man when you go shopping with a friend - gay.

Friend or fashion accessory?

The presence of a friend - Gay now has become equivalent to a fashionable bracelet or a dress from the last collection. Do not forget that gays are also people. They have feelings. No need to consider them the subject for boasting before girlfriends. If he is really your friend, then try to put friendship in the first place, and it is his orientation.

Guys - gays are rather angry and sensitive. Think about the correctness of their use as a fashionable toy. You can break the life of life.

We are good when we together

Probably, this is one of the most reasonable causes of such friendship. A sympathy arising from the first minutes of communication is played here. Such a friendship will be strong, and the fact that my friend is gay or not will be unimportant. To the question "Why are you friends with a guy - gay?" There will be an affirmative answer - "Because he is a wonderful person!"

Always remember: We are all people, everyone has feelings. Respect yourself and others!