Contact! There is a contact! Often, moms, having learned about the theory of affection, begin to worry much: "Do I behave with my child? Suddenly he has an unsafe type of attachment formed? Suddenly he will not trust peace because of me? "Of course, the fact that

Do you often watch other people in your eyes? And they are you? A look into the eyes allows you to establish mutual understanding, recognize a lie, fall in love or fall in love with yourself. Former Agent FBI Jack Schafer in the book "Include charm on a special service technique" tells how to become charming, to achieve its goals and change life.

How to send a friendly signal

The right eye view will help you create a favorable impression of yourself as a person whom you can perceive as a potential friend.

Choose a person to whom you want to send a friendly signal and look at one second in your eyes. You should not look longer, it will be perceived as aggression, that is, as a hostile signal. Long-term visual contact in the first stages of acquaintance, especially on a date, this is the invasion of a person's personal space.

Complete visual contact with a slight smile. If you answered the same, it means you managed to call sympathy to yourself. If a person looks into your eyes, then briefly takes a look, and then restores visual contact again, you can safely approach him and begin to communicate. You are interested in him and he will be happy to communicate.

Long view of the eyes

In an unfamiliar environment, for example, in a crowd on the street, a look in the eyes lasts only a fraction of a second, and most people are avoiding visual contact at all. Long-term eye view usually transmits strong emotions - this is a sign of either intimacy and sympathy, or hostility and aggressiveness. It may be so unpleasant that we usually avoid contact for longer than one or two seconds.

Long view right in the eye is an excellent means to establish mutual understanding.

Such behavior should not be confused with the unceremonious habit of staring at unfamiliar people. Usually when establishing a visual contact, you look into the eye partner no longer than a second, since a longer look will be perceived as a threat. Stiring on a stranger, you send him a signal of hostility. However, when people are familiar and good to each other relate, the visual contact can continue for a few seconds and longer. For example, lovers often look to each other in their eyes. If you apply the technique described below, you can safely use a long visual contact to establish a better understanding with a stranger.

After installing visual contact, continue a couple of seconds to watch a person in the eyes, gradually turning away from him, but continuing to keep the focus. Seeing that you turn around, the person will think that you interrupted contact, so the look will not be perceived as an unceremonious look.

This technique will allow you to strengthen the emotional effect of a friendly signal. Be careful: long-term visual contact can not be used to prematurely get close to the unfamiliar man. Men often use this technique not to the place and spoil potentially possible relationships.

Enter eyebrows

To enhance the impact of short visual contact, add a friendly eyebrow game. This means instant eyebrows. When people look into the eyes and boil eyebrows, they thereby show that they do not represent a threat to each other. Our brain subconsciously recognizes this signal. Having received it, we send a partner a response non-verbal signal that we can not be afraid, because we have no hostile intentions.

Most people do not even realize this gesture, do not notice how other people do it, and do not feel how they make it themselves, since it is almost always carried out mechanically and unconsciously. Try to watch people who are found for the first time in life, and, if possible, for the development of their communication.

Pay attention to pupils

Extended pupils talk about increased interest. If you see a nice person, then pupils are involuntarily expanded. The stronger the sympathy, the wider the pupil. Of course, this is a very transparent hint that you are attractive for someone, but it is not always easy to notice him in everyday life, therefore, the value of this friendly signal is very limited.

Expansion of pupils are best noticeable in people with blond eyes.

The dark-eyed people often look unusual because their pupils seem extended all the time. Pupils are expanding and with not enough light, so when evaluating this physiological response, it is necessary to be attentive and prudent.

The short-term effect of the expansion of pupils can be achieved if you imagine that something was very surprised.

Do not roll your eyes

Eye rigging at the sight of another person is considered a hostile sign that breaks and makes it impossible to further interact. By this you inform the person that you consider his behavior stupid or unacceptable. If, for example, being in a large company, you hear how someone, in your opinion, says nonsense, can in response to theatrically roll his eyes. If the one who concerns will notice your movement, consider that positive relationships in the future are impossible between you. However, it matters if you are familiar with this person or not.

Watch how someone rolls or rounds eyes at meetings and meetings, is a very exciting occupation, which also helps to understand how people relate to different statements. If they do not share the opinions of the speaker, then often roll or rounded their eyes when the speaker turns away or deepens to his records. This non-verbal signal allows you to immediately identify disagree.

If, saying something, you suddenly saw someone rolled his eyes, pay close attention to this person to subsequently try to convince him that your opinion deserves attention. Remember: You should not spend the forces on the belief of supporters who have already listen to you, fed, nodding and smiling.

Smiley eyes

If you smile only your lips your smile will look fake. But if you smile only with your eyes, even without lips, you will look very charming. Wrinkles around the eyes are clear signs of a real smile.

A speaking always notices that he does not listen. It is best to give the interlocutor to know that you listen carefully, supporting constant visual contact with him. Thus, you are serving a friendly non-verbal signal that further fastens friendly bonds.

You do not need to look into the eye to the interlocutor. It is enough to look at him two thirds or three quarters of time during which he says. This is quite enough to achieve mutual understanding and convince the person that you really are interested in what he tells.

With the help of the view, you can become charming, reach your goals and change life

Most importantly, let your soul mirror be full of sincerity and kindness.

Spectacular contact - who we look at, and how long we look, can have a much greater impact than our words.
Eyes are messengers of the soul. We can "keep our eyes open", we are "with an eye on the eye" with some, but prefer to "close your eyes" on others. Some people "more than it seems at first glance", some we beat as "Zenitsa Oka", on some "look around." We can make the decision "without blinking the eye."

Eye contact

We can quite accurately read emotions just looking into the eyes, because of which it is somewhat problematic with people in sunglasses, as there is no visual contact.
Where, when and as we look at others, are part of the phenomenon of view, one of our most important and primitive communications. Spectatic contact plays a decisive role in the conversation. Looking at another person, we use a way to obtain feedback on specific items. The look is also used as a synchronizing signal. People tend to look at the end of the statements: it gives them feedback and control over the conversation.
Spectatical contact is used to promote and believing all human beings. For example, we know that the glance can offer interaction when we look at another person from the other side of the room. The return of the view is usually interpreted as accepting an invitation, while the view lead is a refusal. We are dealing with embarrassment when you take a look; This prevents further conversation. Or ignore us and punish just the lack of views in our direction.
There is more mutual visual contact between friends than other people, and the frank look view is widely interpreted as a positive attitude.
People who are looking for visual contact during a conversation are considered not only as solely benevolent, but also as more truthful and serious. So, sellers know that you need to look into your eyes to each buyer.
The reasons and consequences of the expansion of the pupil are especially interesting, because it is one of the features that are not realized during communication. Take such an example: men showed two identical photos of a woman with the only difference that on one of them its size of the pupil is artificially increased and twice as much natural size. When they asked to appreciate which photographs more attractive, 60-80% chose photos with falsely advanced pupils. Nevertheless, if you ask them to show what photos are different, very few will be able to determine the expansion of pupils; Instead, point to the condition of the skin, the texture of the hair, lips, or face shape.
Pupils are expanding for various reasons. With bright light, they are compressed; In the dim light they expand. But they are also expanding when people experience strong emotions, such as sexual excitement or rage. Moreover, people react to other people who think they are sexually interested by them. Women have drilled the extract of plants of Belladonny (which literally translates as a beautiful woman) in the eyes to cause the expansion of pupils (and, as it turned out, as a result, had problems with vision). It can be a painful and dangerous process, but this method was considered to be in order to attract men.

Factors that determine our visual contact:

Distance. In the elevators, we turn face to the door, because we are too close, and the reduction of the distance between the glances helps to reduce discomfort when our personal space is disturbed.

Topic of conversation. It is not by chance that Catholic confessional and psychiatric sofas are located in such a way as to try to reduce the number of visual contacts between the priest or a doctor and man. When people talk about shameful and annoying things or look inside themselves, they feel better, when they really do not see others.

Interpersonal relationships. People look at those whom they love, more than the rest. Our pupils are expanding more when we look at those who we like. The glance can also signal the dominance: more powerful people look extensively. At the same time, it should be borne in mind that a straight look signals a threat, while the view leads, most likely, a summonation signal.

Cooperation. The degree in which people are ready to cooperate, and not compete, is often transmitted by visual contact. The duration and type of view are important: the general value of a long look is that a person is interested and attentive. Nevertheless, in combination with some expressions, it can also easily indicate a threat.

Personality. Extraverats look more likely and longer on their interlocutors than the introverts do. Confident, bright and dominant in society type of people look more, while it is not typical of socially alarming personalities.

Appearance. People look less on disabled people and less attractive individuals and vice versa.

Mental illness. Many psychopathology are associated with reduced visual contact, especially autism and paranoia. Schizophrenics and people suffering from depression tend to avoid glance.

People mask visual contact, carrying dark glasses or umbrellas. Blind people do it to show their blindness, but also because they cannot watch people in the eyes. The guards wear dark glasses so that possible suspects could not see the direction of their gaze. Road police use mirror glasses to reduce the possibility of conflict: angry or nerve drivers can postpone confrontation if they not only can not see the eyes of the police, but also forced to see themselves with their eyes. They experience objective self-consciousness, seeing themselves as objects, without seeing those with whom they communicate.
Most of us know people who close their eyes during a conversation. This may mean that a person is boring or he feels its superiority. They denied the speaker and the ability to receive and give feedback.
The ways are furnished can maximize or minimize visual contact. As chairs, tables and other office attributes can also be the key to understanding the personality and its preferred data transfer method. Since the location of the furniture can dictate, as closely you are sitting with each other, how to easily look into your eyes into the eyes, an angle of visual contact or direction.
So, our view is a trivial non-verbal behavior or an important way to communicate, conscious and unconscious, with each other? What do you think is as important as an eye contact?