The patriarchal family in modern Orthodoxy. Patriarchal and nuclear family

Of particular importance is the typology of families, which contains information about the structure of power in the family, about the predominant family functions of men and women, about the specifics of intra-family leadership. In accordance with these criteria, the following types of families are distinguished: traditional patriarchal, traditional matriarchal, neo-patriarchal, neo-matriarchal And egalitarian. The first four types of families can be called asymmetric, the last type - symmetrical.

IN traditional patriarchal the husband is its indisputable head of the family, the dependence of the wife on the husband, and the children on the parents, is pronounced.

The role of “owner”, “provider”, “breadwinner” is assigned to a man. Male authority is recognized without question or accepted under pressure. The dominance of paternal authority is unlimited. The authority of other family members depends on their gender and age: the elderly are most revered, men have more rights than women. Clan interests prevail over individual ones. Therefore, such a family is called authoritarian-patriarchal.

A man makes a fundamental contribution to the material support of the family, manages its financial and economic resources, determines its status and social circle, and makes responsible decisions on the most important problems. He sorts out intra-family disputes and represents the family outside. Male sexuality is given an active role, this attitude is concentrated in the concept of "potency". The spouse is released from household duties. The wife is either a housewife or earns very little. The organization of normal life and consumption falls on her shoulders, and she is required to exemplary housekeeping, to create a cozy and comfortable atmosphere in the house. Her responsibilities also include looking after children and raising them.

In its classic version, the patriarchal family is briefly characterized as follows: the husband is the sole head and patron of the family, women's obedience is the wife's natural duty. Marriage was perceived as a state established by God, in which a man and a woman live together, in mutual understanding, giving birth to offspring and thereby avoiding fornication. Thanks to the consecration by the church, marriage in the eyes of society acquired the features of constancy and longevity. The vitality of marriage was determined by pragmatic goals: it allowed to strengthen the material position of the husband's family.

Famous patriarchal image- a virtuous wife. The social activity of a woman was limited to household chores and daily care for the spiritual and physical needs of children. Children should be brought up in obedience and piety. The best qualities of a woman were the recognition of a dependent position and the service of her husband in marriage. It is appropriate here to recall the native Russian words "get married", "married". The meaning of female sexuality was seen in childbearing. The spouse is a representative of the fair sex, possessing natural physical and intellectual strength.

This cultural stereotype was supported by religious and legitimate formulas of male domination, which localized the social space of a woman.

The hallmarks of a patriarchal family are patrilocality And patrilineality. Patrilocality consists in the fact that a woman follows her husband, that is, she settles in his father's house. Sons, married and unmarried, live in the parental home; daughters leave him only when they get married. This shows respect for the paternal family. In modern Russian families, the question of the place of residence of the newlyweds is decided much more freely. Patrilineality means the calculation of kinship through the male line. Consequently, wealth is passed on to the heirs of the male line, and the father has the right to decide whether to reward his sons or not. The fathers of families are still interested in the birth of boys, "the successors of the family", at least as the first child. This position of young Russian men is subject to the unconscious "pressure" of centuries-old traditions.

In science, there are conflicting views on the problem of the relationship between the patriarchal family, society and the state. Outstanding Psychoanalyst Wilhelm Reich in the work “Psychology of the masses and fascism” unambiguously expressed his point of view: “... an authoritarian society reproduces itself in the individual structures of the masses with the help of an authoritarian family ... In the person of the father, the authoritarian state has its representative in every family, and therefore the family turns into the most important instrument of his power. For sons, a deep identification with the father is the basis of emotional identification with any form of authority. In an authoritarian family, there is not only competition between adults and children, but also competition among children in their relationship with their parents, which can have more serious consequences.

According to another point of view, the patriarchal family protected the rights of the individual from encroachment on them by the state. Primary in it were the relations of spontaneous cooperation in the process of family production, thanks to which individual egoism was overcome. views Elton Mayo, one of the creators of the famous theory of human relations, can be attributed to the so-called neopaternalism.

The idea of ​​paternalism suggests that relationships in an enterprise, in a firm should be built on the basis of patriarchal, family ties, when the leader performs the function of a "father".

Up to the middle of the 20th century. traditional values ​​retained their influence both in Europe and in Asia. But the process of transforming the family into a “moderately patriarchal” was steadily gaining momentum. In the 1950s, in post-war Europe, there was a weakening of the dominant positions of fathers in almost all social strata.

Acceptance/rejection of the patriarchal model by contemporaries largely determined by the decrease in the social and economic dependence of the wife on her husband. At the same time, working women perform the vast majority of chores in the household and provide psychological relief to the husband and children. German historian R. Zider writes that the attitude of the wife towards her husband is still of a service nature: “As before, the satisfaction of the objective and subjective needs of the “main earner” has absolute priority over the needs of the wife and children. Patriarchy has not yet been overcome. In any case, however, the patriarchal basic relations of family members, which are essentially socio-economic and determined by cultural tradition, are overlapped by increasingly partner forms of address.

IN traditional matriarchal family personal headship belongs to a woman. Matriarchy, like patriarchy, did not exist among all peoples. But many nations have maternal lineage, for the reliability of the mother is objective. At all times, the mother played an exceptional role in maintaining family ties. The ability of a woman to regulate interpersonal relationships and use indirect methods of influencing others helps to win in the struggle for power. In separate families, with the formal leadership of a man V In fact, the dominant position is occupied by a woman.

If we are talking about Russian family, then the feminine, maternal principle is more pronounced in it. I.S. Kon recalls that Russian wives and mothers in the pre-revolutionary era were often strong, dominant, self-confident personalities. This is reflected in Russian classical literature: "He will stop a galloping horse, he will enter a burning hut."

Under Soviet rule, the “strong woman syndrome” was preserved and even intensified. Women bear the main responsibility for the family budget and the primary issues of domestic life. Typical for Soviet times is the image of a peasant with a ruble or a three-ruble note in his pocket, daily given out by a compassionate, but powerful wife. This is not the fault, but the misfortune of a woman whose husband brought home a salary, the size of which could have little effect. The wife had to contrive and “stretch” this amount until the next salary. She had to take the reins of government into her own hands. Such was the price of the stability of the existence of the socialist family.

The claims of a Russian woman to headship in the family can be understood on the basis of a general trend in the history of Soviet society - the trend of demasculinization of men. The most authoritative specialist in the field of gender psychology and sociology, I.S. Kon suggests that neither in professional activities, nor in social and political life, the average Soviet man could show traditionally masculine traits. The stereotypical image of a man includes such qualities as vigor, initiative, courage, independence, self-government. Social and sexual lack of freedom was aggravated by the feminization of all institutions and was personified in dominant female images: mothers, teachers, etc. Under such conditions, the strategy of transferring family responsibility to the wife was psychologically justified. From the deformation of the male character, the woman is unlikely to have gained anything. Where the husband rebelled against the power of the wife, she either endured rudeness and humiliation, or sacrificed her abilities and professional achievements. In a family where the husband accepted his subordinate position, the wife was deprived of the necessary support.

More harsh in their judgments V.N. Druzhinin:"... the dominant role of the Russian woman was imposed by the Soviet government and communist ideology, depriving the father of the main father's functions." Relations in the family in a totalitarian society become psychobiological, not socio-psychological. A man is deprived of social and economic opportunities to provide for his family and raise children, his role as the main agent of socialization is reduced to nothing. The totalitarian state assumes the entire burden of responsibility and replaces the father.

At the same time, the importance of the natural psychobiological connection between the child and the mother is increasing. Breaking this connection leads the family to disaster. Then the state and society are again forced to turn to the problems of motherhood. A “vicious circle of imaginary causes and real consequences” arises: “... in a modern Russian family, a woman wants (and is forced by the force of circumstances) to rule undividedly and completely. A man is not able to provide for his family, be responsible for it and, accordingly, be a role model.” Way out of the current situation V.N. Druzhinin sees in the creation of social conditions for the manifestation of male activity outside the family.

The division of family power is also realized in modern married couples. In order to prevent destructive conflicts, it is necessary that such a separation suits both spouses and contributes to the fulfillment of the family's functions. The traditional model of the family may be quite acceptable if the spouses' positions regarding the power structure are consistent. With regard to the family, the famous question of power is question of family leadership or, more precisely, headship. The head of the family combines both the leader and the manager.

IN neopatriarchal family the strategic and business (instrumental) leader is the husband, A tactical and emotional (expressive) leader- wife. The spouse determines the long-term direction of the development of the family, sets the priority goals for its existence, chooses ways and means to achieve these goals, formulates appropriate instructions and instructions for family members. He knows the current state of affairs well and foresees the possible consequences of the decisions made. It is the spouse who performs the role of the authorized representative of the family in society; the position of the family in the world around him depends on his actions. Extra-family activity of the husband (father) - professional, social, political, etc. - is encouraged by the household. The man himself has high claims in this area, is distinguished by a business orientation, pragmatism, takes care of the material well-being and social status of his loved ones. The worldview and life strategy of a man serve as a guide for all family members. He sets the style of family life and ensures its implementation. The younger generation sees in the father an example of strong-willed qualities and organizational skills.

The father is impressed by the desire of children to express their opinions, a realistic assessment of people and events, and the successful mastering of independent activity skills. The wife finds life support in her husband, and his labor achievements become a source of pride for the whole family.

If the spouse is responsible for long-term planning of family affairs, the spouse develops short-term plans, which are easily and quickly correlated with the specific actions of adults and children. The prerogative of a woman is to build everyday contacts between family members. It develops relationships of mutual assistance and cooperation. Being interested in increasing the cohesion of family members, she organizes joint events, the range of which can be extremely wide, from general cleaning and Sunday dinners to anniversary celebrations. Admire her competence in the intricacies of domestic life. She is also in charge of family entertainment. She is endowed with sensitivity to the needs and emotions of all family members. The wife corrects the psychological climate in the family, creates an atmosphere of emotional and moral support, develops her own leadership style and “support style”. The wife (mother) ensures the functioning of the family as an environment for emotional release. In a neopatriarchal family, the father acts as an expert for children in business and production issues, and the mother - in intimate personal relationships.

IN neo-matriarchal family is the opposite. A common feature of the considered variants of families - joint leadership of husband and wife in dividing their spheres of influence. Conflict in a marital dyad may arise as a result of an indistinct distribution of spheres of influence or claims of one of the spouses to a different role.

egalitarian family suggests full and genuine equality of husband and wife in all matters of family life without exception. The current Constitution of the Russian Federation and the Family Code of the Russian Federation declare the principle of equality between men and women, which is the legal basis for the development of an egalitarian family.

Husband and wife contribute (proportionately) to the material well-being of the family union, jointly manage the household, jointly make all major decisions, and equally take care of the children and their upbringing.

The role and importance of each of the spouses in shaping the psychological climate of the family is equal, the status of the family is established by the spouse who has a higher position. The circle of communication is formed by both spouses. This marriage is called biarchal, or cooperative symmetrical marriage. Being spouses means "running in the same harness." Apparently, it's more convenient to do it this way?!

In an egalitarian family, the principle of consistency in the positions of spouses takes on special significance. It is necessary to come to an agreement on a very flexible division of spheres of influence, on a high degree of interchangeability. Everyone should be ready to become a leader, business executive or educator. Differences that arise should be resolved through mutual agreements, compromises or mutually beneficial exchanges.

Children are full members of the family, as far as possible participate in the discussion and implementation of decisions. In their upbringing, humane methods are used, based on trust in the personality of the child, recognition of his rights. The initiative and independence of the child is encouraged, his needs for autonomy, development of individuality, and creativity are respected. Children who come from such families may tend to use a similar relationship model in their marriage.

The ideal model of an egalitarian family is presented in the concept of open marriage, according to which it is believed that in marriage each of the spouses can remain himself, reveal his abilities, and preserve his individuality. Spouses should not be "one body and one soul." Marriage is built on mutual attraction and trust, spouses do not seek to manipulate each other's behavior, subjugate their partner.

Principles of open marriage:

· One must live in the present, proceeding from realistic desires.

· Respect your partner's privacy.

· Communication should be open and based on the consideration: "say what you see and feel, but do not criticize."

· Family roles should be mobile.

· Partnership should be open: everyone's right to their own interests and hobbies should be respected.

· Equality is affirmed as a fair division of responsibility and benefits.

· You should give the other the opportunity to live according to his ideas; know your worth and maintain your dignity.

· Trust each other and respect extra-family interests.

The creation of an egalitarian union is a complex undertaking, since it requires, firstly, a careful and scrupulous description of the rights and obligations of the spouses; secondly, a very high culture of communication, respect for another person, mutual information and trust in relationships.

Some scientists speak of an egalitarian family as a conflict one: power functions are distributed, but their distribution is a constant ground for conflict. The egalitarian model in Russia is given the role of a transitional one. Its appearance is due to the growth of the economic independence of the family from the totalitarian state, the growth of the economic, social and political role of men. It is considered preferable for our country to have such a family in which, along with equality of rights, the father will take responsibility for the upbringing and maintenance of children, while maintaining other family responsibilities for the mother and children.

In Russia, younger and better educated men are more egalitarian and take on more domestic and parental responsibilities than was previously the case.

(Greek pater - father + arche - beginning, power), the first historical form of a monogamous (paired) monogamous family, headed by a man. It arose during the transition from matriarchy to patriarchy as a result of the enslavement of women as a result of the weakening of their economic role and the concentration of wealth in the hands of male owners. Thus, monogamy appeared in history by no means as a union based on consent between a man and a woman, but as the enslavement of one sex by the other, as the proclamation of a contradiction between the sexes unknown before patriarchy. The patriarchal family united several generations of the closest relatives, leading a joint household. In its classical form, it existed at the first stages of the slave-owning formation, but its various modifications have been preserved among other peoples to this day. Such a family was strictly monogamous only for a woman. For men, the development of slavery and other forms of dependence and domination opened up new opportunities for polygamy ( cm. Polygyny).
In the countries of the East, polygamy was elevated to the rank of a legal form of marriage, but even the European patriarchal family included both relatives, descendants of one father with their wives and children, and domestic slaves, including concubines. Capitalist production relations destroyed the connection between family life and production (primarily in the city), which was characteristic of feudalism. For many families, the economic function was limited to the organization of their life. Under capitalism, there was no need for large, "undivided" families and their patriarchal structure. Most families began to consist only of spouses and their children ( cm. Nuclear family), and family relations have become less hierarchical. Sociological studies show that the vast majority of families organize all their intra-family activities on the basis of equality, where decisions on the main issues of family life are made jointly. The democratization of family relations does not exclude the presence in the family of a leader in one or another area of ​​family activity. According to opinion polls, in Belarus and Russia, no more than 15% of families mark their husband (father) as the head of the family. In a significant part of these families, the primacy of the man is due to his authority, and not to the unconditional subordination of the wife to her husband.

(Source: Sexological Dictionary)

(large family), a form of family, at the head of which is a man. It arose during the transition from matriarchy to patriarchy; consisted of several generations of close relatives, leading a joint household.

(Source: Dictionary of Sexual Terms)

See what the "Patriarchal family" is in other dictionaries:

- (large family) a form of family headed by a man. It arises under patriarchy, consists of several generations of the closest relatives, leading a joint household ...

- (large family), a form of family, in which power belongs undividedly to the eldest man. It often has an extended composition, that is, it includes several generations of relatives. * * * PATRIARCHAL FAMILY PATRIARCHAL FAMILY (large family), form ... ... encyclopedic Dictionary

patriarchal family- (gr. - father, beginning, power) - a family built on the traditions of an old obsolete society, similar to a tribal community. This is a family based on the complete and unlimited power of the father, the masculine principle. The tribal community as a form of family community ... ... Fundamentals of spiritual culture (encyclopedic dictionary of a teacher)

See Art. Family … Great Soviet Encyclopedia

Patriarchal family (extended family)- a family consisting of several generations of close relatives, leading a joint household, with the absolute power of a man as head of the family ... Sociology: a dictionary

AND; families, families, families; and. 1. A group of people consisting of a husband, wife, children and other close relatives living together. Prosperous, poor Large s. Intelligent, friendly, big with. Working, peasant with. Live your... ... encyclopedic Dictionary

family- a family, a minimal social association based on ties by marriage, consanguinity, or some other relationship (for example, non-formalized sexual) and existing in all human societies. The family is characterized by a mandatory ... ... Encyclopedia "Peoples and Religions of the World"

FAMILY- FAMILY, an association of people based on marriage or consanguinity, connected by common life and mutual responsibility. Being a necessary component of the social structure of any society and performing many others. social functions, S. plays an important role in ... Demographic Encyclopedic Dictionary

A small group based on marriage or consanguinity, whose members are connected by common life, mutual assistance, moral and legal responsibility. As a stable association arises with the decomposition of the tribal system. The first historical form ... ... Big Encyclopedic Dictionary

I. Family and clan in general. II. Family evolution: a) Zoological family; b) Prehistoric family; c) The foundations of maternal law and patriarchal law; d) Patriarchal family; e) Individual, or monogamous, family. III. Family and clan among the ancients ... ... Encyclopedic Dictionary F.A. Brockhaus and I.A. Efron

Books

• The world of the Russian woman. Family, profession, home life. XVIII - early XX century, Ponomareva Varvara Vitalievna, Khoroshilova Lyubov Borisovna. Since the second half of the 19th century, more and more Russian women support themselves - they enter the civil service, achieve recognition in pedagogy, medicine, journalism, even in such a purely ...
• The world of a Russian woman: family, profession, home life. XVIII - early XX century, Ponomareva V., Khoroshilova L.. Since the second half of the XIX century, more and more Russian women support themselves - they enter the civil service, achieve recognition in pedagogy, medicine, journalism, even in such a purely ...

- the primary cell of society, the first circle of people's communication: here a person first enters into social relations - family relations between parents and children.

Family - a circle of stable relationships based on marriage between husband and wife and on blood relationship between parents and children, brothers and sisters. Family members are bound by common property and life (joint living and housekeeping), moral responsibility and mutual assistance. Family relations are thus both natural (biological) and social (social). Human biology is unchanged, but social relationships change, and with them family forms change.

In prehistoric times, the family united only blood relatives: brothers, sisters, and their children. What about husbands? They were not part of a consanguineous family. Two friendly clans (families) entered into a “marriage union”: men of one clan entered into marriage relations with women of another clan. Such relationships were fragile, so males in the female gender were accepted as guests, the children remained in the maternal family. Over time, the marital relations of individual couples became more stable, the first, still very weak element of selectivity appears. However, men are still guests in the family of their marriage partners. They. males belong to another allied clan. The consanguineous family was headed by a woman, and the corresponding historical period is called matriarchy.

patriarchal family

With the advent of private property and the accumulation of wealth, the question of inheritance arose. It was important for a man to eliminate all doubts about the origin of his heirs. A patriarchal family arises, where the power of the head of the family extends to the wife (or several wives), children, domestic slaves and slaves. The patriarchal family existed not only, say, in slave-owning Rome, but also in the Russian pre-revolutionary village. Here, of course, there were no slaves, but there were sons, their wives, their children, unmarried daughters, elderly infirm parents. The patriarchal family performed a productive function as the basic unit of agricultural production.

In the Middle Ages, a monogamous (single-married) family was formed, with a stable relationship between husband and wife. In such a family, the power of a man becomes less rigid, a woman receives a more honorable and free position. With the development of industry and cities, the family loses its production functions, it is now busy raising children, organizing everyday life and consumption.

Nuclear family

The family's loss of the productive function has accelerated the process of narrowing the family, its fragmentation, getting rid of "superfluous" relatives, who, however, are themselves happy to live as their own family. Today, most families consist of a husband, wife and their children, most often minors. Such a family is called nuclear (from the Latin nucleus - the core). Profound changes in intra-family relations in industrial and post-industrial countries occurred during the 20th century due to the greatly changed position and role of women in society. The national economy needed women's labor, and the woman received her own source of livelihood, independent of her husband. Her economic dependence on her husband either weakens or is abolished altogether. The woman was given the freedom to control her own destiny. Now she is kept in marriage by common children, spiritual and sexual intimacy with her husband, his cordial respect for her, his willingness to take some of the household chores off her shoulders.

In the second half of the 20th century, a number of ethical family values ​​were radically broken, and the ethics of family relations were changing. Firstly, the value and even the immutability of an officially registered marriage is falling; many families arise where the husband and wife do not register the marriage, believing that in this way they preserve their freedom. Such families can be both fleeting and very durable. Secondly, the moral principle has been archived, according to which the wife is given to her husband, and the husband to his wife for life. Even the church is forced to abandon this principle. Today Anna Karenina would calmly leave her husband for Vronsky, and no one would condemn her. Thirdly, the attitude towards extramarital sexual relations has changed, they are no longer taboo. At the same time, society looks at women with illegitimate children, and at such children themselves, in a new way. Single mothers are not condemned, and their children are not infringed in any way in their social position. Do such dramatic changes undermine or strengthen the strength of the family? They undermine and strengthen. They undermine families based not on the free choice of spouses, but on some kind of dependence of one spouse on another. It is difficult for such families to survive in the new conditions. On the contrary, families that have arisen by the free choice of spouses do not experience any pressure to break from external circumstances.

Mass breakup of families now is a worldwide phenomenon. In some countries, the number of divorces is equal to the number of marriages. What are the reasons for this phenomenon? In addition to the reasons already mentioned, I will name the following.

Firstly, in modern conditions, a young person enters an independent life earlier than his parents once did. In Western European countries, children, barely reaching the age of 17-18, leave their parents' home and live an independent life. They enter into early marriages, which most often break up after a short time.

Secondly, all kinds of social vices are widespread, in particular drunkenness and drug addiction. Many who suffer from such vices make family life unbearable. Because of the drunkenness of a husband or wife, for example, many families break up.

Thirdly, the main interests of many spouses lie not in the family, but outside of it: in the service, in business, in social activities. The family, the house becomes only a “bedroom”, which alienates the spouses from each other.

The crisis in family relations is especially evident in demographic terms: Russia is dying out, that is, the number of dead people exceeds the number of births. We have an average of one and a half children per family, and to maintain the balance of the population, 2.3 are needed. The consequences can be catastrophic: a country with a small population will not be able to hold vast territories; soon there may be a deficit of the able-bodied population; there will be no one to feed the children and the elderly.

Society and the state are interested in strengthening the family, since the well-being and prosperity of society largely depends on it. The task of protecting and strengthening the family is solved by family law.

Such a unit of society, which is inherent in maintaining strong family ties with other generations, is a group of people consisting of a husband, wife and children.

In such unions, the man plays the main role: he makes decisions, provides his wife and children with everything necessary and has the right to the last word..

Consider what caused patriarchy in the past and why it remains in some marriages to this day.

Firstly, for a long time, under equal conditions, a man could get more food for himself. Due to her daily activities, a woman could hardly go hunting or work in the mines. Since the husband brings food home and provides for the children, then he will get the right to vote in all important decisions.

Secondly, one of the reasons is the transition from a traditional to an industrial society. Who could work more in production? That's right, men. The specificity of the attitude towards a woman could not allow her to dominate. At that time, even education for the “weaker” sex was almost impossible. Only ladies of the upper classes could be trained if they so desired.

At the beginning of the 20th century, women openly began to fight for their rights. It is not for nothing that we celebrate International Women's Day on March 8 - on this day in 1908, the first rally on equality took place in New York.

Today in Russia, according to statistics, the traditional type of family prevails over the partner family - many believe that respecting a man, giving him a leading role in marriage means respecting the history of past generations.

Signs and characteristics of the traditional patriarchal model of the family

Let's see what characterizes this type of marriage. Since the wording of traits is vague in many textbooks, we have prepared for you the most complete list:

• A man is the bearer of moral authority, and therefore is also responsible for the honor of the family.

• Society does not condemn and protects the right of "property" of the husband over his wife.

• A man is almost completely responsible for a woman and children.

• The husband financially provides for his wife.

• Parents instill in their children a love of work and responsibility for their actions from an early age.

• The head honors and respects his wife, and she respects him.

Patriarchy has both positive and negative sides. However, with all the shortcomings, the advantages outweigh - there are practically no divorces in such marriages, children and the elderly are always provided for, as this is considered one of the traditions of such a society.

The following eloquent example will help to trace the characteristic features of a patriarchal type of family.

It's no secret that the couple of Nikita and Tatyana Mikhalkov is considered very strong - still, more than 40 years of marriage, children, grandchildren. Today's generation has a lot to learn from the older ones. Nikita showed his stately, strong-willed character to his future wife on the first date. At that time, young Tanya worked as a fashion model and was seriously thinking about a modeling career. A whole group of friends gathered the girl for their meeting - she put on bright makeup, made a rather provocative hairstyle. As soon as Nikita saw her, he immediately took the person to the toilet to wash.

However, Tatyana was far from offended by such behavior, it made her convinced that Nikita sees in her not only a beautiful appearance, but also a rich inner world. After the wedding, Mikhalkov insisted that his wife quit her modeling career and take up the hearth, - Tatyana relented.

This example shows that a powerful, strong and traditional man is able to create a strong long-term union. However, the examples do not end there. We will look at a few more famous marriages, but a little later.

Types of patriarchal family structure

Our observations made it possible to distinguish the following types of traditional alliances according to the degree of alignment of forces:

With tight control

In such a cell, nothing is done without the knowledge of the husband - whatever you say, it should always be as he decides. This species is rarely seen today, as it was common in the 18th-19th century. Now total control is found only in very religious unions, including Muslim ones, or in third world countries.

Respect and reverence for men

This position is defended by our Orthodox Church. A woman also has her weight in history, but the dominant position of the hero and protector is always performed by a man. Such a marriage is harmonious in itself, as it performs its function - the upbringing of a harmonious personality in a calm environment.

The power of the husband may not extend to all spheres of life.

Then the families in which partial patriarchy reigns are divided into:

• those in which a man manages the financial part;
• those in which the husband is responsible for the honor of his wife;
• those in which children are raised by men.

What does a strong traditional marriage mean, Vladimir and Tamara Vinokur can show by their example. Their union has already been exchanged for 4 dozen - and it all started when both were only in their twenties. Work brought them together, however, despite Vova's courtship, Tamara was adamant at first, she refused everything. After some time, they did get back together. Marriage was also difficult, the situation was painfully ridiculous: the theater in which Tom worked required a Moscow residence permit, and therefore she offered her loved one ... a fictitious marriage. Vladimir insisted on his own - and here he is, a happy example before us.

Such unions can be attributed to the second type of our first classification, where a man consults with a woman, but still makes the decision himself.

Features of the norm of raising children in a patriarchal family

The upbringing of children in such unions is considered to be strict, but fair - the child is instilled with the values ​​of modern society from childhood, but based on the respect of the previous generation.

Here are some tips for communicating with a child that are used by patriarchal parents.

Always take responsibility for yourself and your actions

Do not give the child the right to decide for the parent. For example, you want to punish your son for spilling sauce on his new pants. No need to ask what you do with it - even as a joke. A parent is a model of behavior for a child, and therefore follow your authority.

Make time for rest

Parents will be able to raise a child in a calm atmosphere only when they put themselves and their thoughts in order. Your emotions directly reflect on children.

Do not transfer your problems to children

Hard day at work or bad shopping? You do not need to express your negative emotions in front of a child, it is even worse if you simply decide to take everything out on him. It is easier for you in this case, and worse for the children. Yes, it is not easy to catch such situations at first, but you need to develop the habit of constantly analyzing your words - it will be much easier to get used to it.

Let's choose when it's necessary

In order for your baby to grow up to be a free independent person, you need not only to instill family values, but also take care of his own choice - whether it be candy or filling for pies. If you do not want to get an ungrateful child, then from childhood accustom children to the desire to decide something on their own.

Refer to the experience of the previous generation, but do not forget about modern values

The best way to raise a worthy person is to transfer into his behavior those traditions and values ​​that your family has adhered to for centuries. Do not forget that you are the successors of history, and therefore you can bring something new into it. When the child grows up, he will thank you for the right upbringing.

And we offer to help you with this. The family tree is the embodiment of the traditions of your family, its noble history. Our specialists will not only create a Pedigree Book according to your wishes, but will also help you fill it out.

Let the child feel that he is absolutely free

The family of the patriarchal type is characterized by imperious concern for their loved ones. That is, this is a situation where it seems to the child that everything happens according to the "laws of the streets", although in fact you yourself are completely and completely in control of the circumstances. In this case, the child's behavior may vary: he will either go with the flow, or he will begin to actively fight the existing situation. In the first case, the child must be saved immediately, otherwise trouble is inevitable. In the second, it is worth observing and at first maintaining the position of a peacemaker. Especially when the child trusts you and tells all the secrets.

Many social science textbooks say that a patriarchal family is characterized by a sign of total surveillance of the wife and children and is characterized by control over all processes in the house. However, this approach has become obsolete and can be detrimental to marriage.

Examples of the patriarchal family model and parenting abroad

We have already given examples of happy patriarchal marriages of compatriots. And what is going on there, on the other side of the world? It turns out that overseas there are also examples of traditional families in which a man plays a leading role.

The personality of Arnold Schwarzenegger is known to many: bodybuilder, actor, politician. And what about this man with women? He met his only one at a charity tennis tournament back in 1977. Maria, the niece of that same John F. Kennedy, refused her boyfriend for a long time, and finally gave up. The couple have been together for 25 years and have four children: 2 daughters and 2 sons.

According to rumors, Arnold, being on the set, cheated on his wife. However, no one has ever made a scandal out of this scandal for relatives, and Schwarzenegger himself did not leave his missus with the children. Which, in fact, characterizes the traditional and patriarchal type of family.

Michelle Pfeiffer, famous actress, and TV producer David Callie have been together for over 20 years. Their fate brought them together at a party with friends: they were both delighted with how similar their views on raising children are. It was this topic that brought the couple together. Michelle often notes how her husband is firm, straightforward and sincere - this, in her opinion, should be a real man.

A love story more than half a century long will be told to you by the incomparable Italians Adriano Celentano and Claudia Mori. It started with broken light bulbs, wounds and guilt. For a long time Adriano, already a well-known actor at that time, would have courted an actress who had not yet become famous, if not for the occasion. After the wedding, Claudia supported her husband in everything: there was a time when Celentano mortgaged his house for the filming of the film. However, the wife believed in the success of the film, and then together they celebrated a win-win game.

Sting and Trudy Styler. She is a popular TV star, he is a talented singer. History is silent about their first meeting, but both spouses claim that it was love at first sight. They hid the novel for a long time - away from the gossip and gossip of journalists. They have been together for almost 40 years - a significant date! Trudy never put pressure on Sting, always supported him in everything. It was she who became the starting point, thanks to which the singer changed for the better. They scheduled their wedding after 10 years of relationship. Truly one of the traditional marriages.

These examples make it clear what a traditional patriarchal family is, how it differs from others, how it is characterized and what features it has. After the studied article, it is important to conclude that such a marriage is built on mutual respect, recognition of the authority of the husband and boundless patience and love. Most often, it is this way of life that helps to overcome new numbers and celebrate anniversaries.

Speaking of the patriarchal family, we mean, as a rule, something ancient, related to the "gray old days." Meanwhile, such a way of life corresponds to far from the most ancient past of mankind. A patriarchal family is a type of family structure corresponding to patriarchy.

The word "patriarchy" literally translates from Greek as "the power of the fathers." In other words, we are talking about a social organization in which men "rule the show". Such a social structure was preceded by another - matriarchal, when the main thing for the survival of the family were female "abilities": to collect, preserve, increase ... When something else became at the forefront - to capture, protect - only men can really be the main ones under such conditions.

What are the distinctive features of a family that has developed under the conditions of patriarchy?

First of all, it is patrilineal - i.e. everything is inherited through the male line: property, social status, belonging to a certain family - all this passes from father to son.

Secondly, a patriarchal society is characterized by either monogamy (one husband - one wife), or polygyny (polygamy), but not polyandry (polyandry).

A patriarchal family is always multi-generational (and this is one of its fundamental differences from a nuclear family), at least three generations of relatives live under one roof, or even more (if life expectancy allows). The number of members of such a family reached 200-300 people, and the life of such a rather large group was controlled by a family council headed by an older man.

And of course - as the name implies - the patriarchal order reinforces the dominance of men and the subordinate position of women. Among the Slavs, such a man - the head of the family - was called "big" or "house builder" (not in the sense that he built houses, but in the sense that he built the life of a family house - remember the book called "Domostroy"), in Ancient Rome - Pater familias (father of the family). Moreover, the ancient Roman pater familias had the same power over his wife and children as over slaves and ... things, he could just as well claim them in a lawsuit. However, in most patriarchal societies, the male head did not have the right to interfere in the women's household - it was ruled by the eldest of the women (bolshukha).

The supremacy of men in such societies is fixed not only by law, but also at the level of ideology. “The virtue of a man ... is to cope with state affairs, the virtue of a woman ... is to manage the house well, observing everything that is in it, and remaining obedient to her husband,” writes the ancient Greek philosopher Plato. And how surprised Herodotus was when he saw that Egyptian women were allowed not only to go to the market and engage in trade, but also to appear in court, inherit and bequeath property, certify legal documents, sell or acquire real estate on their own! In the patriarchal society of ancient Greece, all this was impossible.

Families of this type exist today - and not only among Muslim peoples. In any nation there are families that retain at least some features of patriarchy. Psychologists, as a rule, smash such a way of life, arguing that only a pathological, insecure person with low self-esteem and, in addition, a hyper-responsible one, can be raised this way. Meanwhile, such a family way is not without advantages: in principle, in such a family there can be neither abandoned and useless old people, nor neglected children, and a mature person will not be left alone with his problems. And the education of responsibility has never harmed anyone.