Three secrets for a love relationship for life. How to maintain a relationship for life. How to Maintain a Relationship - Have Sex
With all the communication problems that exist, it is no wonder why it is so difficult to maintain serious amorous relationship... The bond staggers on many occasions, leaving two people frustrated and frustrated. Now, if we were able to accurately read, or at least largely guess about the thoughts and feelings of each other, then there might be more second honeymoons than divorces and visits to lawyers ...
According to a recent Harvard University study, "Being able to accurately read emotions and assume that your partner is trying to understand your emotions is associated with satisfaction in your relationship."
In other words: Empathy (understanding the emotional state of another person through empathy, penetration into his subjective world) can be the secret of a happy marriage and keep a serious relationship for life.
Developing empathy is like developing and building muscle. It requires the same perseverance and perseverance every day. The activation of such a state and skill in oneself takes some time, requiring some work on oneself. But the choice is always yours, and if you want, you can develop empathy skills and habits that you can learn.
Do you want for life? Do you want to renew? Then try these 3 little secrets.
Developing empathy.
One woman complained that her husband could not see what she was, although he was just a friend, and completely harmless to their family. I asked her, how would she feel if her husband had such a friend of the opposite sex?
She replied, "What happened a few years ago." And I said, "How did you react, how did you feel?" To this she replied: "it hurt, unloved and felt embarrassment."
You know, these simple questions helped her understand, intellectually and on a level, what and how her husband is currently feeling.
Practice of reflective listening.
Listen to emotional messages. Emotional messages are not the same as verbal statements - they are feelings hidden behind words. Look behind words and find meaning, even if the other person is having trouble articulating.
Then rephrase the content backwards so that it can be checked for accuracy. Instead of if you understand how he or she is feeling, have the other person tell you when you have expressed your feeling clearly.
Be prepared to apologize for mistakes, no matter how trite it may seem.
Allow yourself, if you spoil something, do it better, as a gift from the heart. Nothing means more than an honest admission that I am doing something wrong, an open admission of responsibility and a willingness to do it differently.
Whatever secrets and tips you use, make sure they are consistent, and always be consistent yourself.
Applying throughout the day or week, just by adopting it as a lifestyle. Do it and do it with the aim of extending yours forever.
Marriages are not made in heaven, but you can be in heaven if you put in the effort every day to get there. And the Master class "Man and Woman: Relationships" will be able to help in this difficult task, which will give not only answers to many questions, but also useful recommendations! Be happy!
Is it possible to, live your whole life with one person, and keep at the same time loyalty all my life?
Psychologists claim that monogamous They consciously choose their life partner, once and for life, and then remain faithful to him. But physiologists say that live your whole life with one partner almost impossible. Let's figure it out.
Of course, there are only a few absolute monogamous people, but relative ones who had hobbies in their youth, but true love is only one, not so little.
It seems that everything is clear, I chose one (one) for life and love, but such a cunning thing as physiology sometimes loves to play a trick on them, and often sets its own traps for them.
The body rules!
Hardly anyone would argue that a man is by nature polygamous. This is how nature arranged it, men only have to submit.
For the survival of the genus, and also in order to improve the gene pool, only the very best males receive the right to own a female. And this right still needs to be defended against other contenders-competitors. It turns out that the libertine ladies' men are just the orderlies of the forest!
The authors of the same theory argue that females, due to caring for the same gene pool, also prefer to be faithful to one male. And in general, if they already have the best of the best males, why look for others? Live and be happy!
It is clear, if she gape, and the male was not the best, then he can “twist his tail”.
But most of all they doubt the possibility of lifelong loyalty to one partner - sexologists. They found that in the life of every man, and women too, there are such extremely dangerous periods when they practically "blow off the roof."
During such periods, even the most morally stable ones can easily “set off the shores”.
Men even called this time "the seven years of madmen", and it falls on the period between 42 and 49 years. Gentlemen at this age “suddenly” begin to realize that youth is leaving, and in order to prove, first of all, to themselves that “I can still” they start intrigues on the side in the form of young (well, it's as lucky as anyone) mistresses.
During ovulation, women have periods of such a strong sexual desire that some of them may not resist and begin to cheat on their husbands with might and main, and after a week they wonder what happened to them?
And this can happen not only during ovulation. According to Rutter University professor Helena Fischer, women are genetically programmed to change sex partners every four years.
In the course of the studies, it was found that by the end of the third year of life together, the chemical reactions that occur in the brain of a woman in love almost completely fade away.
And as a result, the woman begins to think that maybe she should look for a new man. Usually, a woman continues to live with her husband, but this is rather a consequence of the influence of reason and moral and ethical standards.
And the feelings?
Based on the foregoing, it can be said with precision that at the physiological level, nature does not put in a person that he should be polygamous. There is no setting to be monogamous in either men or women!
They keep up with biologists - sexologists and psychologists, they also argue that a person can fall in love many times in his life and this is normal.
Simply put, each of us needs love, so the number of romances in our life directly depends on how much we were able to satisfy this need. But here we are talking not only about bodily satisfaction, but also about mental satisfaction.
Some are lucky to find their soul mate right away, and some life is not enough for that. Many, having found their destiny, voluntarily join the ranks of monogamous people.
A person is not born monogamous, he becomes one, and moreover, consciously! “Homo sapiens”, unlike animals, is able to control their emotional impulses. Yes, the feelings of monogamous over time resemble a quiet fire, and not a hot flame, but the beauty is that it will burn for many years and not go out.
This form of relationship can be called "friendship-love and the elements of eros."
Statistics say that women are more often loyal to their men. 60% of them do not even think of cheating on their halves, despite the physiological traps, such as ovulation or genetic programming to change partners.
According to statistics, there are half the number of faithful men.
What do you think, in principle, is it possible to remain faithful to one partner all your life?
Any, even ideal, relationship, sooner or later fade away. Lost interest in a partner, the desire to learn and live moments of life together.
Flowers once a year, lack of desire to understand a partner, resentment and irritation, daily routine - all this can destroy the most passionate relationships.
But why does a once loved one become so alien and cold? Where does love and mutual attraction disappear? And is it possible to maintain a relationship with a loved one? Of course yes!
How to keep a relationship in a long-term union
Relationships need to be constantly built and developed. They need to be taken care of, otherwise they collapse like a house of cards. And what to do to prevent this from happening? Here are 11 "rules" that will be useful to everyone
1. Control and freedom.
When two people start living together, they want to know everything about each other. But over time, constant inquiries, the desire to know everything about your partner, the desire to be in touch all the time become one of the catalysts for the collapse of the relationship. In fact, behind this is the desire to control the loved one completely. But why do we want to control another person all the time?
The reasons for this behavior are fears. People are afraid of loneliness, they are afraid of losing love, they are afraid of losing a loved one, and at the same time they are afraid of responsibility for their actions. In such an atmosphere, relationships often lose their lightness and naturalness, irritation, mistrust, jealousy appear.
So the first rule appeared, which says: if you want to keep a person nearby, give him freedom, do not put him in a cage.
2. Personal territory and personal time.
There are situations when partners work in one place, and, accordingly, spend almost all their time together. In such cases, they have a completely natural desire to be alone - to move away from the working day. And the partner at such moments annoys and interferes.
To cope with irritation in this situation, you should not spend all your time together. Try to find time for personal privacy, going to the gym, hobbies, hanging out with friends, etc.
Give yourself and your partner some rest from time to time so that he has time to miss you. For some it may be an hour, for others all day. This is a completely normal situation that a loved one sometimes wants to be alone. Do not make an elephant out of a fly and think that your relationship is about to collapse. Any person needs personal space and time to reflect and relax. This is how our psyche works.
There is an opinion that the rule of personal time is violated mainly by girls. When, after work or school, they begin to dump all the events that happened during the day on their boyfriend.
This is partly true. Men are more closed personalities, and they do not need constant communication with their soul mate.
Therefore, advice to girls: try not to forget about this feature of male psychology and give your boyfriend time to rest after the hustle and bustle of the day.
But even among men, there is often a desire to completely control the woman he loves. Remember, a healthy relationship shouldn't limit your partner's freedom.
3. Gifts and surprises.
To diversify your routine, give each other gifts, and not once a year, but as often as possible. It is even better if it is something special that unites you in life and reflects your common aspirations.
4. Talk about your desires simply and directly.
Do not hold resentment and discontent in yourself. Talk about desires simply and directly. Any little thing can turn into a serious scandal if the problem is solved in its infancy.
At receptions with psychologists, the most common complaint of partners is a friend against a friend, they sound like:
- “You don’t love me at all…” (favorite female manipulation, did you recognize? =));
- or: “You don't let me speak”;
- or "You don't let me rest after work."
Just talk to your partner. Tell us what you dislike and what you want to change. Don't build up negativity in yourself. Don't wait "when it explodes."
Of course, this will require courage, openness and willingness in a similar situation to meet your partner halfway when a loved one also asks for something. But it is compromise and the ability to negotiate that help maintain relationships in the long term.
5. I love you.
To maintain a relationship with your loved one, do not forget these three simple words. These words have a special magic.
Declare your love for your partner and you will see how this phrase holds your relationship together. These are the strongest, most wonderful, the best words that can be said to a loved one.
6. Do not wash dirty linen in public.
When you are in public, never sort things out. Public jokes, insults and showdowns will only harm your union.
7. During conflict, manage your emotions.
If an unpleasant situation has happened through the fault of one of you, try to keep your emotions under control. Don't say too much. After a while, the situation will change, emotions will subside, and what has been said cannot be returned.
8. Help your partner.
Mutual help around the house and at work acts like glue, holding your relationship together for years to come. Help each other and any quarrels will seem insignificant to you.
This rule is especially useful for men. Do not forget to help your beloved women in everyday life, in raising children, in the kitchen. Try giving your lady a day off for one evening. Prepare dinner, do the cleaning yourself, and be sure - your half will certainly thank you =).
9. Thank you.
A magic word, isn't it? How nice to hear it from a loved one. Say thanks after dinner. Or thanks for taking out the trash. Say thanks as often as possible. Put warmth and love in this word and you will receive the same in return. What goes around comes around.
10. Touch each other.
Bodily contact in the life of partners is of great importance. It makes your bond stronger. Hold hands, kiss, hug - just touch each other. Body contact helps to convey to us your attitude towards your partner, love, confidence in safety and protection, warmth, support.
11. Pay attention.
When you spend time together, forget about friends and girlfriends. Spend all your time with each other, communicate, listen, walk. Don't be distracted by strangers. There is only you and your partner.
Very important
These rules and tips only work if you follow them together. If only one partner is trying, then it will not change anything, or it will ruin your relationship.
What kills love between two people and how to maintain a relationship, you can learn from a video clip of a practicing psychologist
Any relationship has its ups and downs, but there are ways to help keep them on track when there are failures all around. It is at such moments that women have questions - how to maintain a relationship with their beloved husband, how to improve relations with a guy, how to preserve a relationship at a distance.
Unfortunately, too many couples make mistakes when this difficult period comes and it is women who are often looking for ways to maintain a relationship with a husband or just a loved one.
Financial difficulties are a major cause of contention among couples. The anger that arises during these fights often leads to other problems, such as the cessation of good communication, cheating, and even comes to verbal, emotional or physical abuse due to certain mistakes.
This happens on the part of both partners. This can be extremely toxic to any relationship and partnership, and even worse if children are involved or present in the fights. Thus, it can lead to systematic stress and violence, which is very difficult to stop and maintain a relationship if it is on the verge of breaking up. How to maintain a relationship in such difficult situations. But there are many ways a couple can avoid these difficult moments. Such advice will keep a relationship that was once so beautiful from breakdown. And as a bonus, we have prepared a video for you about 10 mistakes of women and 10 mistakes of men in relationships (see the end of the article).
Conversation will smooth out any event that is causing problems in your life. Discuss and engage in discussions about what you can do to improve the situation, as well as the advantages and disadvantages of the solutions that each of you offers. Be open and open to communication at all times.
Do not be afraid to speak openly about your desires, plans and outlook on life. 2. Sincerity
Always be honest about your feelings. If you are insincere only to get out of the situation without confrontation or conflicts with your partner, or in order not to emotionally hurt yourself or your partner, then the problem will not go away. It will live somewhere in your head and may eventually explode as a manifestation of great anger directed directly at your partner. This, in turn, can easily lead to a chain of negative events, in comparison with which the original cause seems insignificant. So be honest with yourself and your partner, otherwise you will no longer be tormented by the question of how to keep the relationship.
3. Trust
Trust in your partner and in yourself. You need to trust your partner's feelings and decisions. Do not ask your partner about his intentions again at a time when he needs to make the right decision in a difficult situation. Trust him enough to discuss his problems as your heart dictates, so that your partner is sure that you are just as in search of a solution as he is.
Do not be afraid to brighten your relationship with new vivid impressions. 4. Understanding
It is very important to be able to accept different opinions. You are not obliged to agree with him, but you must listen, delve into and understand his opinion on the issue of solving a problem situation. Moreover, be extremely honest at this stage. Let him know you disagree, but you can listen to him. There are no two such minds that work in the same way, but together they can complement each other and create great solutions to extremely difficult problems.
5. Compromise
We said above that two heads are better than one, but compromise is the most powerful tool in keeping relationships alive and making your union strong and functional. Each of you may have your own ideas and opinions, however, solutions to everyday problems will appear faster if you cooperate with them, and if you learn to compromise from time to time. How to Maintain a Relationship - Learn to compromise.
be attentive to each other 6. Step back
Don't be afraid to take a step back if it gets hot and you're having trouble communicating, take a step back and give yourself some rest. It's never too late to start a relationship from the beginning after a short break. The main thing is not to make rash steps and mistakes, which will later become fatal in your relationship. Take a break and think about what should be said and what is better to remain silent. Go to another room, try to organize your thoughts, and return to your partner with a clear mind. How to maintain a relationship - learn to stop yourself in time and rewind yourself a little. Think carefully before you start speaking words that you both will regret later.
7. Give in
Sometimes it is not possible to connect your thoughts so that they cooperate with each other. Concessions are another form of compromise that you do not often have to resort to. Don't be stubborn, discover other opinions, ideas and solutions. Making small concessions can go a long way towards improving your relationship with your husband. How to maintain a relationship - make him feel like a man, the head of the family, your beloved husband.
Solve all problems as they arise, without delay 8. Creativity
Be creative when it comes to solving problems. When it comes to frequent financial problems, find some creative solutions to stay afloat. You can organize the sale of old things, find some additional work on the side, or sell your own delicious pastries. You can always find a creative solution when it comes to financial problems. One way or another, you will find a way out of this situation, the main thing is that your ideas do not go beyond the law. A creative, it is a creative approach that will give you the opportunity to maintain a relationship with your loved one for life, because often it is financial problems that become a stumbling block in a relationship. And you will never think about how to keep the relationship.
9. Humor
Always try to find time to laugh. Have your partner laugh as well. Thanks to this, you will defuse the atmosphere and the solution will be found by itself. A positive attitude is the key to meeting the challenges that life puts in your path. A good sense of humor will help mend relationships after a quarrel or minor conflict. Notice their comical, funny sides in your common problems. The world around us is so contradictory that you should definitely treat it with a sense of humor. Support your partner in this way.
Share your plans for the future with each other, as well as dream and make dreams come true together 10. How to Maintain a Relationship - Spend Time Together
Take time to not worry about anything and just enjoy each other. It doesn't matter if you find a solution to your problem or not, you should put it aside and spend some time free from problems. Spending time together can help relationships better than any psychologist. Go for a walk, watch a movie, or hug, you can do sports together, for example. Remember why you chose the person next to you to live together. Return to that sense of contentment, without all this reality that goes with every union. How to Maintain a Relationship - Love yourself completely.
11. How to maintain a relationship - value the reciprocity of the relationship
Even if you are very busy, be sure to take some time for general conversations. And this is not only about the exchange of information, about who will shop, clean up or take out the trash. Don't neglect long, varied discussions about life. Building a relationship with a man is not an easy task. Share your thoughts, talk about your feelings, plans and dreams. And remember, communication is a dialogue, not a monologue. Even when you are tired of what your partner is talking about, try not to show it. How to maintain a relationship - always look into the eyes of your beloved during a conversation and listen carefully to him. Sharing conversations strengthens the bond between you. The discussion will also dispel your doubts about the emotional state of the other person, you can predict your partner's behavior. Remember that relationships in which partners know a lot about each other are most successful.
enjoy spending free time together 12. Take care of big passion
Passion can help refresh relationships. Many people say that relationship problems start in bed. There is probably something in this, especially since it has been scientifically proven that problems in sexual life increase tension between partners and in other areas of life. It is imperative to bring passion back into the relationship. Therefore, it is important to constantly take care of the intimate side of your relationship. First of all, you need to ensure that the cold and routine do not come to bed. Despite many years of acquaintance, still allow yourself new madness. Change old habits, try something else new. New erotic adventures can easily save a relationship, but make some common mistakes women make during sex.
13. Don't forget about affectionate gestures.
Never forget about rendering mutual feelings. Take time every day to say something nice to him. Just a short phone call and one SMS in which you support your emotions. Also try to praise each other as this will improve your relationship with your loved one. You should also tell your partner often that you love him, but also kiss and hug him for no reason, even while watching TV. All of these sensitive gestures and words will surely come back to you with interest. It has been scientifically proven that affection, praise and hugs stimulate in our body the production of the so-called "hormone of happiness", which affects, among other things, the establishment of interpersonal relationships.
It is not always necessary to demand from a man the sentimentality that is inherent in women. But demand ramantics in relations and create 14. Argue wisely
Psychologists say that couples who do not swear cannot count on a successful union. A quarrel for partners is not only important information about the conflict, but also a sign that you have not become indifferent. How to build relationships during quarrels, but at the same time keep them. The desire to solve a problem means the need to constantly be together, is a positive component of a partnership. For a good relationship, sometimes it's better to have a good fight than to leave the problem unresolved or pretend it doesn't exist. The dispute, however, should be waged skillfully and wisely. Constructive quarrel is a kind of negotiation art. Also remember that reconciliation sex will only be truly successful after sincere conversation and reconciliation, then it can help the relationship.
15. Enjoy the little things
The enemy of love is routine. To prevent it, you need to constantly diversify the moments that you spend together. Alternatively, go to the movies together, then have dinner at a restaurant, or cook dinner together at home. Sometimes it's worth giving your loved one a pleasant surprise. Maybe at least by sending erotic SMS messages to your partner describing what you want after he comes home. Men also shouldn't be forever in your debt.
a romantic trip can strengthen your relationship, even if it is a trip to a nearby park Of course, you will be very happy if from time to time he buys you flowers or serves you breakfast in bed. Thanks to such little things, you will always be very close. Appreciate the time when you are together and most importantly next to each other. Indeed, in life there are often circumstances when close people are at a distance for a long time and then it is much more difficult to maintain a relationship. We recommend that you watch a video on how to keep warm relationships at a distance and whether they are possible at a distance from each other.
16. Breathe some freedom into your relationship.
You don't have to do everything together to be together. Lack of freedom in a relationship can ruin even your greatest feelings. Being together all the time can get you very bored with each other. Every person needs a little freedom. So it's worth spending some time apart from your partner. Go to a disco with your friends, and send your partner to watch football at a bar with friends. Moreover, when we are far from our loved one, of course, we will miss him faster. This strong desire, which is born in us during the absence of a partner, will make our desire to be close even stronger and guaranteed to maintain a relationship with a loved one for life.
17. Spend time without children
At least once a month, and preferably twice a month, send these little monsters to their grandmother, aunt, girlfriend for the night. If there is no one like that around, take a nanny for at least a few hours to leave the house together. Go to the cinema, for dinner. Spend time only together. How to Maintain a Relationship - Going on a Date Again! And do not whine that it is better to stay at home, because a nanny is expensive. This is the cost of maintaining your relationship. Is that a price, perhaps, you can pay?
spend more time together 18. Go out somewhere with your friends
Home, home, forever home. After a hard day at work, whether at home, at home with children, or other strong irritants. Go meet your friends, even if the children are with you, so that you both win a meeting with your friends while sharing child custody at the same time.
19. Find new common interests
Shared between partners, not between children and parents. General cooking workshops, joint dance lessons, joint running. It doesn't matter what, it's important that it's together again.
20. How to Maintain a Relationship - Have Sex
After a working day, you usually have neither the strength nor the desire for additional physical activity. Wait, but children, especially small children, also sleep during the day. There are days that you are at home together. Use this time. Let the wash wait, pay the bills in half an hour, nothing will happen if lunch is ready a little later. Do not look for excuses, make your vacation unforgettable, take an hour, half an hour and even 15 minutes, just for the two of you.
21. Take care of yourself selfishly
Go out with your friends, another time let him go out with his colleagues. Each of you needs a break, take at least a little time just for yourself. Go to a spa, movie, or coffee with a friend. Put on your makeup, feel like an attractive woman, not just a mother. Let healthy jealousy strengthen your relationship.
you can turn to psycholos for advice, but remember that no one knows your spouse better than you 22. Diversify communication
Exchange hot SMS, leave each other love notes on the fridge, write letters, send links to music tracks on social networks. Any form of communication between you will help you maintain the relationship.
The person with whom you connected your life still exists. He may be a little tired and annoyed, but he exists next to you and you have a unique opportunity to discover him in a new way. Start a romantic, passionate, and intense relationship with a clean slate. You just need to want. If there is a desire, then forward to new moments of happiness and its warm embraces.
How to maintain a relationship with a child?
In a relationship when you already have a child, the situation is completely different. In this case, you are looking for an answer to the question - how to maintain a relationship with a child? Maintaining a relationship when children are born is difficult. But this is not impossible. Analyze all periods of your life from the time of your first meeting, the beginning of the relationship, right up to the first notes of discord in your relationship. Be sure to remember the moment when you first wondered how to help relationships or how to improve relationships after the birth of a child? Thus, it will be much easier for you to find a solution to the difficult puzzle of marriage. You should brush up on and remember the following stages in your marriage:
First meeting
After all, you remember how beautiful everything was in the beginning. Butterflies in the stomach, excitement at the thought of the next meeting, tons of messages and sex. Then hugs on the couch, joint weekends, trips, general events. It doesn't hurt that he can't even make scrambled eggs. She iron his shirts, and she's not even angry with him that she added a red T-shirt to his white linen and after washing everything turned pink. The main thing is that he wanted to surprise her and did the laundry. Everything is beautiful and everything is acceptable. Starting a life together is one of the best things we can experience.
try to start your relationship from scratch, forgetting all grievances and controversial issues The beginning of a life together
These conversations are long, endless ... concerts, shared nights until the morning. Oh, how great it is to know that he is near, that you can fall asleep with him and wake up with him. The fullness of happiness. At that wonderful time, the decision comes about the children. Why not? It's good for you two to live together, it's time for stabilization, and the animal instinct also works. Ah, this is the desire for procreation ...
Birth of a child
A child is born. Heart sinks with hot emotions. Mom is crying, dad is crying, and the baby is crying too, because nothing else can be done at this moment. In addition, we are filled with the belief that everything will always be like this. Ideally. And this is where the child begins to show that everything has changed. Cry. All nights, every 3 hours like a clock, or even more often ... because he is hungry, and this is his colic or a wet diaper, or something else hurts.
Not everything is perfect
Children give joy that is incomparable. You have heard, of course, the expression that the smile of a child rewards any work. And everyone who has children understands this. Nature has endowed us with the blind ability to love these little creatures that we ourselves have created, and this is as instinctive as breathing.
love your spouse in a new way with even greater strength and perhaps your love will warm the relationship The third is not superfluous
The shoulder, which until now was only ours, now holds the child, drives the stroller, carries a bag, ball, doll, book, or anything else related to the child. The hand that once lay in ours during a walk now takes the child's hand and helps to walk the entire route from home to the playground, because this little creature no longer wants to sit in a stroller, only to explore the world with its small, still uncertain steps. The child begins to learn about the world and attracts the attention of the parents, who, focusing only and exclusively on the child, move away from each other.
Coldness in relationships
There is no longer that former romance in a relationship. The endless conversations that brought you closer were replaced by short dialogues, and at ten o'clock in the evening you fall asleep lying on the couch. The intimacy between you disappears, mutual claims begin, you start quarreling over trifles, because latent emotions should eventually explode.
Conduct an analysis step by step and find your mistakes, as well as their correct solution.
Finally, we recommend watching a video about male mistakes in relationships with women. Top 10 men's bloopers. The rating was compiled from the answers of more than 50 girls. Dear men, we love you with all your troubles and will love you even more if you listen to the things that are really important to us.
Mistakes of girls in relationships. Top 10 female bloopers.
We really hope that our advice will help to improve the relationship between you and your husband, partner or boyfriend. But remember, there are no ideal solutions and each case is very individual, although common signs and causes are not alien to him. Everything is in your hands and be happy.
Each of us in the depths of our souls strive for the concept of "ideal couple", everyone wants harmony with their soulmate, but not everyone is ready to fight for it.
After all, you need to work on this every day ... Each of us is individual, and this must be taken into account in relation to your partner. Everyone has their own interests, and ideally so that these interests have points of intersection with the interests of a partner. At first glance, the formula is simple: in order to be an ideal couple, you have to become one. The criterion for an ideal couple will be the sum of the indicators of the quality of the relationship between two people. But what indicators can be used to judge the high quality of the relationship?
First, the sensual side of the relationship
The fact that any good relationship is based on love is nothing new. If you are truly in love, and you are loved, then you have everything.
chances to create a good relationship. Although, it always seems to us that we are in love for real. Then it can be argued that we always have
a chance to create a good strong relationship that pleases both two and others.
We advise you to analyze for yourself the experience of your friends' relationships, remember those whose relationships, in your opinion, are based on
love. Such couples are often on the subconscious and intuitive consciousness an example for creating their relationship. Copy the best in
other people's relationships, to try on patterns of behavior that are acceptable to you - there is nothing wrong with that, we have the right to use that experience,
which is experienced by us and the people who are important to you. Moreover, only what suits you both will take root in your relationship.
In general, take the time to analyze what is happening in your relationship. In addition, I would like to emphasize the importance of analysis not only
problem situations, but also happy moments. Nothing happens without a reason. If you managed not to quarrel under the obvious circumstances of an impending quarrel, be sure to understand for yourself a little later, talk to a loved one, thanks to which you managed to restrain negative emotions and not say hurtful words to each other. If each of you in a relationship understands what can help strengthen your relationship, it will make your relationship richer and brighter.
Second, sincerity and frankness
Not quarreling over small things is an important skill in a relationship. A good, ideal couple must master the art of compromise impeccably. However, in the relationship, of course, there will be clashes of opinions, disagreements, misunderstandings. "Not to quarrel" does not mean to accumulate in yourself
everything that does not suit you. It is important to train yourself to tell the truth - both to yourself and to your loved one. If something depresses you, annoys you (it happens
and such), offends, upsets, dislikes, be sure to find a way to express this to your loved one. However, you also need yourself
to teach from the first day of your relationship to take care of negative emotions only for a one-on-one conversation.
What could be easier, it seems, at first glance, not to wash dirty linen in public. But quarreling in front of everyone - with children, with acquaintances, with parents -
in some families, relationships are considered business as usual. Many consider it necessary to immediately express their dissatisfaction with something,
despite the many spectators. From a psychological point of view, this is correct - upon the fact of what happened to discuss, resolve internal
contradictions. We recommend that you make it a rule to find out, clarify conflict situations between yourself only in private. People,
who see their relationship as mature, mature, and serious will never allow themselves to scold each other in front of someone. Also try not to use even in private when clarifying the situation the favorite words "always," never ", etc. When we are drowning in a quarrel in
these generalizations, it offends, offends another, such a quarrel lasts longer in the memory, these phrases are scrolled. But this is not so
it is difficult, if you are unhappy with today's act of your husband or wife, then tell me about it without remembering long-standing quarrels, disputes, actions or
the words.
Try not to accumulate a bad mood, not to restrain your discontent - learn to talk about what is important to you after what is happening.
The less we leave internal grievances, the freer they breathe next to each other. And if you can't express negative emotions or
just can't explain the reason for your resentment, then just learn to forgive the arcs of a friend.
Do not be afraid of the difference of interests
In an ideal relationship, people are not afraid of differences in interests and views. You can like different brands of tea, coffee, different types sports, watch
different films, admire not the same writers and books. The most important thing is to show interest in the hobbies, addictions of another.
Being genuinely interested in each other's lives is also an art that you need to teach yourself.
Agree, if your young man was impressed by some book, even if you don’t like it, it will be interesting to understand, to understand what exactly could catch on, to inspire a person close to you. Through each other's hobbies, we can sometimes more subtly understand the other. A person can sometimes tell less about himself, so those books, films that he loves. Not every girl is fanatical about football, but going to the stadium together and watching the match, even eating fruit near the TV and cheering for different teams can become one of the possible types of recreation for two. If possible, try to visit exhibitions, concerts, theaters together - after what you see, you will have the opportunity to compare your perception with the perception of a loved one, your impressions of what you saw. Remember that the power of an impression shared with a loved one only multiplies itself.
Spending time together
People who love each other try to spend their free time together. It is hard to imagine that such people constantly plan and spend their holidays separately from each other. In a good relationship, the concept of "holiday" comes into the house more often than the order established by the calendar. In such a relationship, there is a practice of creating your own holidays. Create your own family holiday calendar. The day of your acquaintance, wedding day, the time of the first joint purchase, the first trip abroad - these dates can be in your calendar (first you just need to remember or write down key dates, and after a while choose the days that you want to celebrate or somehow especially to carry out).
Enter a family day to visit your parents. We would like to remind you that a good relationship with a person
presuppose a respectful attitude towards his family. You may not be great friends with your wife's or husband's parents, but your respectful and friendly attitude towards them will strengthen your personal family. Try to have lunch or breakfast together. Do the cleaning and shopping together. Do not divide household chores into women and men. Take care of household chores according to your mood, availability of free time, as needed. Together plan the need for renovation, a particular purchase, trip and inviting friends to visit. Remember, spending time together is just as important as making decisions together, preparing for something together, or going to a parent's meeting together.
Self-confidence and relationships
As much as you are confident in the quality and strength of your relationship, so much you will feel free in them. Even if everything does not go as you wanted, but no disease or diabetes mellitus in children of 5 years old can become an obstacle to your relationship. Freedom within relationships gives natural behavior, without looking back, bright emotionality. In a good relationship, two people give each other a sense of confidence in the future. A person should not be afraid of tomorrow and frightening uncertainty every day. An important indicator of quality relations is the ability of everyone to remain himself, to be as true to himself as possible in his desires and aspirations, without limiting the freedom of desires and aspirations of the other. The author of the article understands that everyone has their own idea of an ideal relationship. However, if the article material makes your relationship a little warmer and better, then it means that you are ready to grow up and are already on the way to the ideal relationship.