What if the husband is constantly dissatisfied: we are looking for reasons and correct the situation. Treason is the most terrible lie. Why a husband is constantly dissatisfied and criticized

Why does a husband find fault to his wife? What does he need? Why does he choose a perfect trifle and again falls again? What to do with such a man?

Small accession to start. It happens, of course, that a man, in essence, on the verge of normality in the field of psyche. But then he quit not only for his wife, but also to other people. And, in fact, it is his constant behavior in life. He behaves so with the leader, friends, acquaintances, etc. (Psycho, if simple). What to do with such men? Treat? Leave? You decide. But it is clear that these are not changed and will only be worse with time.

I will write in this article about quite normal men who come rapidly only to his wife. With the other people, they behave politely, they try to like them and, of course, do not come up at all.

Wives (sometimes with other close people) they are transformed and become petty, ignoble or even low in behavior, men. Puttingure to any nonsense, criticize those areas of life, where the woman is most of all hearing criticism and quit.

It comes to the point that the woman awaits won't wait when her man leaves somewhere. To work, to friends or somewhat else, no matter. In his presence, it feels some constant tension. It feels that as if the man is constantly the edge of his eyes, follows her actions, and the edge of her ear for her words to find a reason to frit.

Why is this happening? What to do?

There are usually 2-3 reasons and I will set them down below.

The first reason is the wrong behavior of the woman.

Example.

- Oh, I forgot again. (I put it because you did not remind you. I put it because I'm tired, etc.)

This is an exemplary dialogue of the "loving" man and women. A woman is justified for making a mistake. IN this case It does not matter if this error was real and rude or it is more than any kind of man, just to fall over once again to his wife.

I repeat that it does not matter. A man quit, a woman is justified. The position of justifying weak.

And if the woman constantly leads to itself, then the man will think about this: "My wife admitted that I was right. So I am wise. Therefore, it is necessary to raise it more often and indicate it for its disadvantages. So it will be better for her, and for the family. ".

Example.

"Dear, you put a cup here, and it should stand for 1 cm to the right."

- Yes, I put everything right. From today, she will stand here. And yesterday I put it on 1 cm. Lefter and now I still indicate where to put. You yourself first learn to put a cup where necessary, and then I tell me how to put it right. And if something does not suit, stand and do it. And at the same time, I also cook tea and cook dinner. And then you, raseous.

(It is very important here, of course, not only words, but intonation, pressure in words)

Much is much better, in my opinion than excuses. In some situation, it is possible even the best option. After that, it is usually a small scandal in the family. But I repeat, in my opinion - this is the best option than if a man is Gund and Gundov that a woman there has done something wrong, it didn't do it here, and here he is right, etc.

The family in this case is like a boiling volcano, which periodically throws Lava, but it seems to me that it is better than a woman just begging every day, and she is silent. (I repeat - this is an example for an ordinary man who begins to heal if it is periodically not to put in place. If he is "psych", then there is no fact that it is even safe)

Another example.

"Dear, you put a cup here, and it should stand for 1 cm. To the right.

- Yes, put.

"But you put 1 cm. To the right.

- Thank you for prompted.

- Well, you put!

- I agreed with you. Yes, put. Why do you repeat again?

This is another option of dialogue. A woman does not argue with a man and, most importantly, not justifying.

Often it is much better than the first two options. (For some women and more difficult)

Only such a speech algorithm (and mental, of course), it is impossible to completely solve the problem of constant pick-up her husband to his wife. However, this is one of the ways and quite effective. (If you do not impose unless younger expectations)

We just need to behave like this. It will not work, of course. It is necessary that this version of the answer is stable for some time. For this, such dialogues need to work in imagination.

Example.

"Dear, you put a cup here, and it should stand for 1 cm. To the right.

- Dear. You do to me hurt with your permanent quirks. We behave like a child. I am waiting for support from you in difficult life situations, understanding and sympathy. And what do I get? Captures about what a cup is 1 cm. To the right? Yes, what's the difference where she stands if I feel bad and I need your support in a difficult situation (due to the fact that there is no stability of income, problems with children, parents, etc.), and you say about the cup.

For me, so one of the best options, but he, of course, also requires training and fit under a specific woman and a concrete man.

And here let's briefly switch to the reasons for constant criticism and pick-up from a man. What is the main reason? This reason for the infantilism of psychological development. That is, the presence of children's or more often, teenage, thinking algorithms.

Just ask yourself a question. Will this truly adult man (psychologically) constantly find fault in trifles to his beloved woman? What for? So that the wife is just waiting for, when a husband leaves home? (And not only the wife, but also children), of course, a psychologically adult man will never do so. Especially if there are difficult times in the family, a woman gets tired, she is scary, or she constantly experiences stress, and, by itself, perhaps and does something wrong. Psychologically mature man especially in a difficult period for a family or for a woman, on the contrary, will support her, will calm down, will try to somehow distract and whether to solve difficulties (or help a woman to cope with them)

But infantile will quite be constantly picking up to his wife and criticize her . He can not otherwise, even if it is obvious not in his interests.

Practically by definition a man who constantly quit to his wife, to some extent infantile. After all, "picky" behavior is the behavior of a psychological teenager, which often, as a real teenager, strive to argue on any issue, you need this in a situation or not. A teenager protests and makes many different nonsense, sometimes destroying his life (at this age, for example, usually begin to drink, smoke, etc.). The psychological teenager-man behaves similarly.

Accordingly, the example above (the behavior and words of a woman) to some extent encourages her husband to become a psychologically adult. To remove those traits from your character, which, in fact, interfere with him not only to establish relations with his wife, but often interfere with their manifestation not only to establish relations in the family, but also to succeed in life. (Not the fact that it turns out, I warn you right away. Some men do not want to psychologically grow up, since this process implies that responsibility)

And the last way is the woman the most advocate. That is, find and criticize a man.

This method although externally and looks like a dispute, but is radically different from it in effect.

The dispute is just pulling the rope on the field where a man feels stronger. He already knows perfectly well that you set, for example, a glass of 1 cm. The right than necessary. You described many times in a joint conversation, where a glass should be, may even record it on some kind of paper or in the file. And now, when you put a glass of 1 cm. The right than you need, then you "hit."

It is useless to argue. The husband will show you the contract with you, where it is clearly spelled out the right place for a glass. He has witnesses and written evidence, where he should stand according to the rules.

Your attempt to translate the dispute to another topic is just as immediately noticeable. Your husband can tell directly.

- Dear wife, you do not transfer the conversation to another topic. A glass stood to the right to 1 cm. To the right. So you are not right and must recognize it, then start me to obey me, then admit that I am the wisest and smart man in the world, as I know where the glass should be correctly. And then of course, in general, stop arguing, since how much we do not argue about the glass, you always do not give right.

That is, your position is obviously weak. And you need incredible efforts to somehow put a husband in place.

It is necessary to act asmetry :). That is, it is necessary to break it periodically and find fault to a man at the moment when he starts his dispute, and then when it is profitable for a woman and at those moments where the man is frankly weak.

Where can a man be weak? Sex, making money, humor, inability to raise friends, educate children, and still with a dozen qualities that are obvious to his wife, it is difficult to argue with them, etc.

That is, you take some kind of quality where a man is weak and start talking about him. For example, money. There is not enough money. Your salary is little for life. In the store, try on things that are clearly not my husband's pocket. Speak something like: "Now, if you earn like Ivanov, now we would not need ..., and we would do ... :))»

It is not necessary to even do it in the version of direct jelly. Just "share" with a male information and difficulties in the family, ask for advice it is much easier and better than how to argue or try to answer the male maps where he considers his positions strong.

Gradually, the man's mooring and do not stop doing this at least until you adjust the self-esteem of your man, and he will not cease to find fault to you in the slightest matter without.

Immediately, I will say that the method of the worker, the truth requires a certain self-confidence from the woman, as a man can still snap. But remember that the nesting is not a one-time action - this is a mandatory effect for any man, even relatively perfect. Just for the perfect man, such a critic can be once a quarter. For a man who constantly quit is a daily "treatment" for half a year.

And the last option is to reduce the sensitivity to the soldiers.

In part, a man quit, since a woman reacts to these quit. She is afraid of them, and the man of something with the help of them achieves from a woman. If not love, at least not indifferent.

You need to learn not to react so much to the soldiers.

How to do it?

Trying during the pickup man to pretend that you do not care - it usually does not work. Such a feeling sometimes it consists that such men feel the spinal cord that the woman doesn't care and continue to gouge, until the woman explodes, pay or somehow they will not bring it out of equilibrium.

Better do the following exercise.

You imagine in your imagination, as your husband quit for you. Then you imagine that you do not care on his quit. You feel about them if not indifferent, then as something like an unpleasant wind when walking.

At the end, imagine that the husband behaves well, does not fit, but on the contrary, says compliments, supports you, etc. Exercise must be done not one day, and a couple of months.

And of course, only a decrease in sensitivity will not help. This is just one of the work techniques 🙂 with your husband.

At the end of a little bit wrong. I certainly do not know your situation. It is possible that your husband will find something to find face, even if you behave perfectly. But maybe he constantly criticizes you for the same mistakes that you provocated 100 times. I, for example, do not perceive the requirements of my wife to remove the socks scattered with me like a soldier. Just learned to clean them and that's it.

It is possible that at least part of the "pickwick" men are not at all quit, but, in fact, the usual requirements of the partner in the family, which you just need to learn how to do it. If so, learn how to do what the husband asks. If this is still real quirks on the "empty" place when the reason is always found, the algorithm is higher.

Let's summarize. A man who constantly quit to his wife is a partially infantal man. (In the overwhelming majority).

The worst way to fix his behavior is justification and disputes. (disputes a little better)

Much better is an ironic consent, a nesting or statement of your feelings from his actions.

I will not say that effective ways will start to act right away. First you need them to become familiar to the woman. Then, in order to work inertia and the man began to change his behavior. But this is several times better than justification, which only strengthen the cattle behavior of a man.

Try the above methods and I am sure that you will definitely succeed in reducing your husband's pick-ups or even reduce them.

And, of course, do not forget to work on your own self-esteem. Often come up precisely to those women who consider themselves in many ways unworthy men. But we will discuss the topic of women's self-esteem in other articles.

Sincerely, Rashid Kirrov.

Family quarrels and constant conflicts with her husband: how to lead yourself if the husband is constantly shouting?

When adults make marriage, they should understand that there may be controversial situations and quarrels in family life. Without them, the development of the pair in principle is unlikely. Miscellaneous education, various social status formed in childhood and youth habits, approach to raising children, moral values \u200b\u200band lifestyles can be causes for serious quarrels and conflicts.

Start quarrels and shouts of a husband

Suddenly emerged strong feelings can combine completely different people. But, after some time, "then one, then another" begins to intervene in the process of living. There are life situations in which the husband and wife are accustomed to behave in different ways. If conflict situations sometimes happen in your family, but you hear each other with my spouse, always find a solution that arms both sides without moving to insults, you should not worry about - in the dispute (and quarrels) you have every chance to find the truth. The ability to find helps to keep a healthy atmosphere and a favorable atmosphere in the family.

But even if in a calm conversation, the husband shouts to his wife without visible to that causes, behaves too impulsively and even aggressively, his behavior scares and wounds, it is worth thinking if you need such relationships?

Rather, whether you are ready to accept this model of relationships. Do you want to keep your family? If so, how to confront cries and scandals? You may be useful for you our advice and recommendations.

Why does husband scream to his wife? We are looking for reasons

If the behavior of the husband has changed very much, he cannot contain himself in a conflict situation, constantly screams, breaks through any occasion, try to understand why quarrels begin. To do this, go back to the very beginning, analyze what you said or did before the corresponding reaction followed. In no case, do not blame yourself, it is important here just to find the "grain" from which the quarrel grew.

The causes of the shouts of the husband can be:

• problems at work;
• alcohol, drugs, gambling;
• psychological stress;
• failure of feelings;
• low self-esteem;
• age irritability;
• healthy scenario.

If your loving and caring spouse suddenly began to break down on a cry, it is quite possible that his something bothers something. He may have problems at work or financial difficulties that he cannot tell you. The causes of aggressive behavior can be the use of alcoholic beverages or drugs. Gamers, alcoholics and drug addicts (if they can't get what they need) behave inadequately, too aggressively, splashing guilt and dissatisfaction with the closest people. If you are confident that all of the above reasons are not related to your situation with your husband, then, most likely, the roots of your today's problem - in the past.

If your husband grew up in a family where the cry was in the order of things where his father and mother only solved family conflicts and disputes in this way, he does not even represent another behavioral scenario. Most often, the man repeats the model of the behavior of the father unconsciously, even if in childhood he himself suffered from such relations and promised himself to never behave like his family in the future.

The husband constantly screams: what to do?

If you got inside this "porridge", and even firmly mired in the model of relationships, where you are a woman who constantly ending her husband's shouts, get out and radically change the situation will not be easy. Any your deviation from humble behavior will be perceived as a riot and cause even greater displeasure of the spouse. So that regular shouts of the husband did not lead to more planning consequences, start acting gradually. Below you will find several recommendations. Their foundation is a constructive work on themselves and with their emotions, since you will be able to "remake" a husband hardly, your main key is your personal behavior.

So, to pacify the screaming husband, try:

• not to be the initiator of conflicts;
• do not focus the attention of a husband on domestic trifles and not "saw", if it (in your opinion) earns little or pays attention to you;
• do not raise the voice and not develop a conflict (contain, even if you have something to say, but you understand the consequences of your "excuses");
• listen to the claims calmly and restrained (it is not necessary to immediately rush to perform everything on points, but it is impossible to ignore this situation);
• solve problems in a calm conversation (after the husband calm down to try again to talk all the accumulated claims. Well-help structures help, it seems "I correctly understood that ...", "You said that ...", etc., which neatly continue the thread of the conversation, but do not turn the said claim);
• do not load your husband with your downtown, if he is the only breadwinner and the breadthrough and really get tired at work (you do not need to create a scale of its fatigue, just decide once and for all - after work your husband wants to relax at least a bit. It makes no sense to demand from it momentary to endure garbage "Since he has not ever ever ever," or "quickly wash the dishes" - it will only evade the emotional background);
• houses of the tired spouse should wait for cleanliness and delicious dinner (destroying and hunger clearly will not make it calm and satisfied);
• praise him, say that love and more often hugging (perhaps he does not have enough of your attention or he "fell out" from family life. Be the initiator of warm relations, and do not wait for the first steps from his part - you have a family, and not competitions to conquer each other);
• analyze each situation, the conversation, the act that led to the scandal and quarrel (maybe you missed something and the problem really exists);
• realize that such relationships are not normal and try to change them for the better or break;
• contact a specialist (a psychological approach can significantly simplify work on relationships, but unfortunately, alone understand what to do, it is often not easy. Try to go on, perhaps, the problem consists not only that the husband is constantly screaming, and lightens much deeper ).

Sometimes even very good wives, hostesses and beauties who are very loved by their husbands, can marry a person who is used to solve conflicts on elevated colors, without choosing expressions.

This means that you are in these circumstances - the victim. Whatever you do, a spouse who repeats the negative behavior of the father in such circumstances, there will always be good arguments to bring you to tears and to be guilty.

How to react to her husband's cries

If all your efforts do not lead to positive results, if you have deteriorated from the constant quarrels and conflicts, if you have a children who have to constantly observe the clarification of relationships on elevated colors between parents, you should think about how to finish these relationships. Everything is simple here: if you feel bad and you are sure that nothing is done anymore, why are you waiting for something?

Tears, persuasions and even threats will not help. People do not change if they do not want it.

Save the family, where the husband screams, and the wife suffers, it is often only an experienced specialist. For the establishment of relations may take years. Staying in such relations due to financial dependence or for any other reasons, women silently suffer in such marriages. They do not apply to their problems at work or friends. Unfortunately, only a very small percentage of women in which the husband constantly screams, insulting and humiliating, is decided to break the marriage.

Sometimes such a decision takes women who lived 10 and more years. The main motive may be their depressive state and the lack of mental strength and physical health to continue attempts to preserve marriage.

However, you should not miss the possibility that your screaming husband himself needs support, his screams and breakdowns on you caused him problems. The best solution here will be to find a good psychologist to parse not family, but the personal problems of the spouse. It is possible that it is in strong stress due to the circumstances that do not concern you.

If you are difficult to decide to break the relationship with your husband, who constantly originates with screams and scandals, for yourself, think about your children, about them and their own future. They are doomed to inherit your behavior model and just as suffering in family relationships. Therefore, if a husband constantly screams on you, and all your attempts to "calm" are in vain, understand, it will not change, and here you already choose: tolerate and suffer or leave and once and forever stop suffering.

Anna Base

Each woman, deciding on the most important step in his life - marriage, dreams of a cozy home, children and reliable support in the face of the spouse. If the first two components of family happiness can be realized independently, then the third is entirely depends on her husband. For many, the question is, however, the question arises, how to behave when the husband constantly insults and humiliates his wife after several years of marriage?

Many of the men, even entered into marriage, do not want to take responsibility and become the head of the family. They believe that life has not changed, as he was beloved, and remained. Only one thing changes in this situation - now it requires attention and care from another woman - wife. He forgets that she has problems related to work, children and a house that can not be pushed aside and engaged only by "His Majesty - husband."

An irritation of a man is growing and instead of understanding his wife and help her, he begins to act available methods. And what can be more accessible than to drive a person in the corner and force the teams to perform their whims? Only insults, assault and humiliation. Therefore, the situation when the husband insulted becomes the norm. But is it necessary to put up with it or it is worth understanding why the husband insults and take an effective decision? Answers will try to disassemble in our article.

Why the husband constantly insults and humiliates his wife - reasons

The reasons why a husband constantly insults and humiliates his wife psychology classified by several positions:

- Feelings that spouse experienced, cooled. This happens in any family - for everyday worries and problems, men and women gradually forget, as each other loved, and how they were good together. That is why the husband is all the time finds the trifles. Instead of trying to support the light of love for a spouse in his heart, he begins to blame the second half and splash out his discontent in insults about it changed after the appearance or for other reasons.

- Spouse started love on the side. To say directly that his mistress appeared, a man may not always. This can usually say out loud men who are confident and try to live according to the laws of justice and honor. Alas, but in the modern world, such copies are in the minority. That is why the husband begins to "make" natives and hysteries to his wife and hysteries, so that she herself leaves him. That is why the husband offends his wife with words: he immediately "kills two hares" - gets rid of the unloved woman with her hands and "unleashes his hands" to start a new relationship.

- disgust. Roughly sounds, but this is indeed the feeling that many men are experiencing, looking at their "fallen" wives. Which did he meet the girl when fell in love? Beautiful, desired, well-groomed, cheerful and interesting. And now in front of him in the apartment there is a "monster" with a silent hair, in a closed bathrobe and from the mini discontent on his face. The same reason why a former husband insults former wife. He loses respect for it because of the "lowered" species.

Cute ladies! Look at yourself in the mirror! Perhaps the reason for the pick-up husband is in your appearance and psychological setting? Pregnancy, monetary difficulties and temporary problems with work - not an excuse.

A woman should always look neat and desirable and then her husband will not have thought of how to humiliate his wife.

Otherwise, he does not find the reasons why he once married this "Monster" and begins to be nervous. In this case, the mawartes are quite obvious and understandable.

- Have you ever seen couples in which the husband plays the role of a handsome peacock role, and a woman looks like a woman on his background? Be sure, in these families, humiliation and insult is the usual manner of her husband with his wife. The woman herself allows you to contact yourself and it often does not even occur, "what to do if the husband calls me a mat and humiliates?" The low self-esteem and silence of the spouse, makes it possible to mock her with impunity.

- There is another reason why men allow themselves to be dismigrating attitude towards their second half - addiction. And if the guy humiliates and insults the girl without a visible reason, it is worth thinking about his position in this life. A woman, feeling that herself is not able to cope with the life situation, it tries not to annoy the spouse on "trifles" and is silent in response to all his insults.

- Control the child is a prerequisite for educating a person in it. But the control of her husband is another matter. An adult person is likely to do not like the total control that the spouses arrange. They grow on his phone in search of mythical mistresses, browsing the correspondence in social networks, check where and when it is. What if the husband shouts to his wife in this situation? It is worth respecting the personal space of his second half. But no, some are lowered even for the fact that they hire private detectives. Such behavior of the spouse causes irritation in a man and, defending, he can fall to extreme measures - humiliation and insults.

True, you can hear from many acquaintances: "My husband insults me and humiliates what to do?" But few think, what is the cause of such a relationship.

Motives, why a man degrades and insults a woman psychology divides into several species. But Whatever the cause of such a relationship should urgently take measures to prevent the recurrence of the situation.

So psychologists advise:

- Call a husband for a walk in the places that you are roads like memory. For example, in the park where your dates were held. That the husband constantly calls and humiliates his wife the psychologist's councils recommended to remember your happy moments. Maybe you "led by life" and it is worth resurrected to the past feelings?

- Get wedding photos and remember how happy you were;

— Talk to your second half of the reasons that cause such a negative reaction. Together try to decide what you should do if the husband constantly insults and humiliates his wife (psychologist's advice - keep calm).

- Explain how hurting you will hurt you. Give arguments in favor of what you are not as he says, let him be ashamed for his words. Although, if a man constantly degrades and insults a woman, psychology gives an unequivocal decision - the wife should become self-sufficient! Ways to this much, believe me!

Often, no arguments can make the insecure in itself and the commander of the husband change the manner of behavior. Because a man who insults a woman, feels a tide and confidence due to the one who is dependent on him and loves. This is a kind of energy vampire, feeding the vital energy of the one who is near.

Here's how to respond to the insult of the husband and these are the advice of a psychologist: look for ways out of this problem, but do not go down to repulsive insults.

Do not run to your girlfriends and do not complain about your "bad" spouse

Tomorrow you will make up, and for friends he will always be a bad man who "lies you from the light."

The wife constantly insults: what to do?

Psychologists argue that the wife begins to humiliate and insult her husband only in one case - loss of respect. Therefore, to correct the situation, you should make every effort to return respect for yourself. It is impossible to force it, but this can be deserved. Here are the advice, what to do if the wife insults and humiliates her husband:

You feel about your wife with respect not only in words, but also in practice.
Do not demand respect to rudeness and strength. This will cause another strongest reaction in response.
It's often the reason for the fact that the wife is dissatisfied and insults, is its unwashed leadership in the house. When his wife constantly has to solve all questions in the house, she grows irritation for the failure of her husband.
Set priorities. Sometimes a man puts his own interests above others, forgetting about his second half. Often with cries and disputes, the wife tries to attract attention.

Husband yelling with a child: consequences

The biggest blow from the humiliation and insults of the husband gets your child. After all, it only seems that the child remains in the side of the conflict. In fact, the mother is a defender and when it is insulted and humiliated, her child loses a feeling of security. The child receives stress, which can later be expressed in the rift to theft, various fears, sadizm.

On the situation when a husband insults and constantly yells with a child, the tips of the psychologist give an unequivocal decision: it should be stopped. The paths are several: from psychological seminars and until a complete break of relationships. Here it is necessary to disassemble the situation individually.

Insults from drunk husband

Before dealing with what to do if the husband drinks and insults, it is necessary to abstract and evaluate the scale of the tragedy. Alcoholism is striking more often those people who are constantly in stress. Therefore, if your second half drinks, he lacks inner calm.

The desire to escape from reality leads to complete degradation of the person, when a person does not understand what is happening where the truth is. If you have such a situation and you do not know what to do when a husband drinks and insults, try to provide him with psychological support and help getting rid of the addiction. If he refuses this and completely suits the situation, you have 2 outputs:

Change attitude to her husband and take it with all the shortcomings;
Raise relationships and leave.

What to do when the husband insults?

In solving this problem there is one "but". All the advice of psychologists can solve the conflict only if the man also wants it.

Having tried to establish an understanding, and not finding a response in a spouse, do not continue to humiliate.

Look for more radical methods. Try to do so that he understands, you need him or not. Run the relationship. Maybe he will understand that you are the only woman who needs him. Otherwise, your gap will be the beginning of a new life for you with another person you will need, like air, with all your advantages and disadvantages.

January 14, 2014.

2 comments

How great when harmony and mutual understanding reigns in the family, and most importantly - respect between the spouses. It is important that those relationships that were before painting in the registry office are preserved for many years. The young man in love serves his hand when his girl comes out of the car's salon, runs towards to help convey a heavy package from the store, answers the call not only during the day, but at night, gently calls "his girl", "Sun", "joy" ...

But, unfortunately, nothing is eternally under the moon, and in many pairs after a long life of life in marriage, there is something at night in the pillow "bunny" and "kitty". The spouse begins to insult his wife, humiliate, and in general it becomes another man, a terrible person. So what is it? A crisis? Loss of respect or loss of men? In this article we will disassemble the situation in detail.

Why does a husband insult and humiliates his wife: possible causes

So, cold, such unfamiliar and unpleasant words, who do not even want to say that they do not want to pronounce in a change of gentle "paws" and "fish". Why does it happen? The reasons can be a lot and most importantly - to get to the truth, then there is a chance to fix something and save the family.

Unfortunately, constant humiliation and insults in the address of the wife can fly due to the fact that another woman appeared, with whom a subconscious spouse compares its half. Realizing, so let's say, the imperfection of your wife and, wanting to get to the new choices from her, a man can be extremely inadequately to lead, to make complaints, it is absolutely responding to absolutely about everything: appearance, cleaning in the apartment, cooking and so on. Why does a man do it? Most likely, he decided for himself that he would leave the family to beauty-deliberate, but could not solve this problem with a civilized way - through negotiations and a love partition, then an attempt was made to push his wife from herself. Everything comes down to the fact that the tired and morally depleted woman's first will give a divorce and thus will untie his hands to her spouse.

But not necessarily another woman can cause. On the Internet, you can meet many humorous statuses about life after marriage, one of which sounds as follows: "The girls marry are thin, so that it is easier to penetrate into the house, and over the years you get fat to push it hard." And ridiculous, and sad. Indeed, there are women who, after receiving a cherished stamp in a passport, forget about themselves. And well, if it is temporarily, let's say, after the birth of a child, when young mom simply does not have strength to keep track of the balance of fats and proteins, there are no funds for fresh manicure and there is no desire to make hair removal in the bikini zone. And if it is a banal laziness? Not every man is ready to endure looked, in the rad who changed not for the better, a wife, even though he is similar to "and in illness, and old age ..." There mumbled in the registry office. And every man wants to come back home from work in a clean apartment and find a minimum of three dishes on a plate that in our modern time is a rarity.

Another important reason is a crisis in relationships. For a long time, a stereotype was formed, as if "love lives three years." And what after? The man lacks the attention of his wife, he feels lost, like the cartoon mammoth and that at least somehow attract the attention of his wife, begins to behave wrong. So often do problem adolescents who lack parents. They are ready to blow up the school, if only their parents saw them. But only the opposite results are achieved.

There are, of course, the type of men who humiliate and insulting a woman, the mother of their children, just trying to throw out stress accumulated in the day. The tired man returns home and it begins to annoy everything. This is just a weak man, he cannot cope with his emotions. And the simplest - throw away the whole negative on the one who is closer. It is not for nothing that you can't say to someone else's person, because it is possible to scream, and the relatives probably probably created.

Many men, unfortunately, creating a family and degrading the help of parents, really realize that they do not pull the entire burden of responsibility for a woman, children ... Cat. They lack self-esteem, ambitions grow, and there is no implementation. I want to buy new shoes, as you were to university years, but you need a warm overall jumpsuit, I want a car, but I don't approve a loan, I want to go to Turkey with friends, and then this family, to which the man was not ready. And then the failed head of the family falls into depression, ceases to act. First, blame itself in what can not do anything, and then finds an extreme in his spouse. And then, in the address innocent in the male insolvency of women, rude words and expressions fly.

And it still happens that both from scratch began, they released from one university, but the quarry spouse went to take off much faster than her husband. The male ego suffered. And it was the cause of constant humiliation of insults. In other words, humiliation in attempts to self-affirmation. This does not happen so often, but still takes place.

What is better not to do, faced with humiliation and insults from the spouse

The most important thing is not to respond to rudeness rudeness. You do not need to feed the "internal demons" of your man, it will only disappear aggression.

No need to chop sneaking, collect things and go out of the house. If a man is on hand (new woman), that is, the risk of losing a family. Of course, it is not worth sitting as a scored mouse, taking everything as it is, but also to run away from the problem is also not an option.

It is absolutely useless to try to change something radically: give birth to or adopt a child, to leave work, invite mom or mother-in-law.

What if the husband morally humiliates his wife?

To begin, it is still to find out the reason for such behavior and already on the basis of this think about what to do next. It all depends on the degree of resentment and love for a man.

Of course, if a man fails for a long time and ultimately asks a divorce, it is necessary to let him go. No need to torment him nor herself.

Nekrasov was always sad about the "female dat", because the truth, the Russian woman suffers everything, forgives, justifies. Is it worth it? Many psychologists strongly recommend not to slow and disperse with such a person, find a worthy man, build a new family. It is easiest to go. Do I need? If it continues a slight period of time, the woman sees that her husband is bad, he suffers and all this is poured into such behavior, then it is possible to just substitute the shoulder. Woman - rear, battle girlfriend, quiet harbor. It is a woman who can raise his man from the bottom and give him a good advice, help, support, calm down. Who, if not she? So many years to build relationships, to give your nest, bother with habits, learn to love, so that it is so overnight all the disappear?

It is worth trying caressing, warm and tenderness to return confidence in the family and human attitude. Change the situation by selecting an interesting route for a walk, for example. Or remember the years before marriage, go to your favorite cafe, try to talk, return romantics in the family.

You can do it really. A woman who loves himself and respects himself, causes the same feeling of other people subconsciously. Moreover, the spouse will celebrate confidence and change.

And, of course, you need to pronounce everything. All problems, inconsideration, resentment should be voiced. Perhaps a man does not notice that he calls somehow his woman unpleasantly for her. Maybe the "chicken" is absolutely normal for him? Close in yourself and swallow tears from pain not exit.

Let's summarize. If a beloved person allowed himself rudeness, humiliation or offensive expressions addressed to his woman, you need to start with the original source of such behavior, deciding with the problem, try to discuss it without emotions, on a cold head. And if the marriage and this person really need a spouse, try to cover the resentment and sorrow with love and care. If it makes no sense in the preservation of these relationships, then only you can think about a pause (for the possibility of understanding everyone) or about the break.

Downtown comments, a disgruntled face of men and scandals on this soil - the frequent cause of divorces. Is it just enough in his difficult character? What if the husband is constantly dissatisfied? We will try to deal with these issues.

The reasons

While you are only visiting, everything is cloudless and fine, but starting a family life, a man appears quite in a different light, as if someone replaced him. Negative begins to act on the nerves, which leads to a quarrel. The woman sincerely does not understand what is the matter, and the reasons can lie on the surface.

Here is some of them:

• Unnecessary expectations. The men also develop a certain image in his head, which he transfers to his companion. But in the end, everything turns out quite the opposite. And his beloved is not ideal. Life with your own disappointment is not sugar, rudeness appears, mixed with hope everything is fixed. The husband quit, but it is almost impossible to change a person with a well-minded character.
• Unresolved problems. Agree, each has such a period when everything falls out of the hands, and at work the head, which is not clear what requires. On whom to break? Of course on loved ones. And the first who fall under the blow is a loving wife.

• Superproduction of his wife. "I just didn't wash the dishes, and he began a scandal due to nonsense. He began to treat me worse. " Woman loves to exaggerate too. Considering that it is the most wonderful, adequate criticism can be perceived into the bayonets, and the guy in her eyes becomes a tyrant or annoying grumbling.
• Character. A man was constantly such, he just showed himself only now, when domestic issues began. Or you did not see this shortage of it before.
• Responsiveness. Wife can also be far from a gift. Comparison with others, in a look more successful, reading morality, public disassembly simply destroy family relationships. Men by nature are quite restrained, but an end comes to any patience.

Middle age crisis

This is a separate topic for conversation. The middle-aged crisis appears in each second and its manifestations are diverse. A person understands that half of life by shoulders that many plans are not implemented, the goals are not achieved, besides, there has been a decline of forces, health problems. Children matured, with his wife for a long time in marriage. A feeling of worthlessness is born, thoughts that they do not need anyone, fill his head.

Much regrettable about his insolvency goes into deep depression. Naturally, in such a state, a man ceases to enjoy the world around. He is dissatisfied with his wife, work, car, house, children, practically everyone. It can last such a state for several years. A woman should not be an enemy of number one, which even more increasing the already complex relationship, but support, a personal psychologist who can bring her beloved from emotional darkness.

How to solve the problem?

First, take yourself in hand. No broken plate in anger and rage, no nervous cell, died as a result of a breakdown, will not change the current situation. Full control of himself and its emotions is a huge step towards victory.

Secondly, turn on the observation. It will help to find the cause of the contention and put on there is a completely indisputable attitude of the spouse. Learning what is happening, there are several options for further events.

The wife simply ignores comments in your side. He will understand that there is no sense from the pick-up, and just switches to someone else. But here there are its cons: grinding even about other topics also takes out of themselves, and the lack of an emotional burst, which a man is so achieved, will start annoying even more. There will be thoughts about the indifference of his wife to what is happening.

Psychologists allocate the so-called mirror principle - to start behaving in the same way as the husband. A good way, he not only raises the mood, but also allows your chosen one from the side. Looking at your own reflection, you can make the right conclusions. But the main thing is not to overdo it.

Absolutely all people are imperfect, and the harmfulness of the husband is the same unpleasant traction of the character that you need to perceive adequately and with the fraction of wisdom. You should not repel a person, and even more so divorce with him, you yourself tied your life with him, just change everything in your hands.