A boy at 10 years old features of education. Psychological features of the upbringing of boys. Know your address and know the way home

26.06.2020

Maria! Your son is entering adolescence, when his behavior can change dramatically, attitudes towards studies, teachers ... to a certain extent - this is a normal crisis, which cannot be avoided. your task is to help the child go through it with the least losses and come out of it stronger, more perfect. if he behaves differently in different situations (spheres), then obviously the reason must be sought not in the child, but in his environment (in particular, in school). You need to talk about this in more detail in the chat, analyzing the details of your situation. Or I suggest you take a distance course for parents (affordable and effective).

Unfortunately, no one teaches us to be parents... And only in the process of raising our children, we gain the much-needed knowledge and skills... The fact that you are aware of your problems is a big plus! It costs a lot. But the stereotypes of our attitude towards the child appear in our childhood and have been pursuing all my life. In order to change them, in order to begin to notice the positive in a girl, purposeful work on oneself is needed.

18 years ago, shortly after graduating from high school with a degree in psychology, I watched an interesting scientific documentary film. It told about how animals teach their offspring the important wisdom of life, without which they would not have survived in the wild. It turns out that female rhinos have been teaching babies proper nutrition for more than a month, showing what plant foods to eat. And killer whales with whole families train grown cubs to hunt for seals. I thought, why in a society of people we practically do not prepare future parents for such an important function as the upbringing and development of children? And only after becoming parents and faced with the difficulties of raising a child, we begin to look for ways to increase our parental competence, improve relations with the child, and strengthen the family. The training course is aimed at solving these problems, various versions of which have been used by us for more than 20 years in the course of consulting and psychotherapeutic work with parents (during this time, 950 families were assisted).

To answer your question, you need to analyze your relationship with the child, perform tests and, based on the diagnosis, draw conclusions. Try to determine your attitude towards each child separately ("Parental Attitude Test" in the article " Find out how you feel about your child: www.psycholog-help.blogspot.com/p/blog-page.html I also recommend taking a distance learning course on building relationships with children: "HOW TO CHANGE A CHILD'S NEGATIVE BEHAVIOR?"

Here is a short quote from the course:

· Ways of influence on the "difficult" child.

What tactics should adults have in dealing with such a child? Let's formulate "Rules" of parental behavior:

1) in relations with the child, parents need to rely on positive qualities of his personality (a positive attitude generates positive behavior);

2) show own example of positive behavior , avoid discrepancies between your own words and actions - “Do as I do”, and not “Do as I say”;

3) evaluate not to the personality, thoughts, emotions of the child, but his behavior - not “You are bad”, but “You did badly”.

Only behavior can be corrected, changed, and the child can do it. While personality, thoughts and emotions we cannot change;

4) inspire the child positive (“you can”, “you are doing the right thing”, etc.). Give the child confidence in your own words, and do not doubt him;

5) live for today , not to recall negative situations from the past without special need;

6) don't live life instead of a child but to be there and help him if needed. He treats the child like a tree that needs to be given sunlight, water, and not pulled by the trunk so that it grows faster :).

All the best to you, Yuri.

P.S. Dear customer, the experts have spent their time and professional knowledge to answer your question. Please choose the best answer and mark the answers of other experts.

You can often hear the conversations of indignant ladies that modern men are irresponsible, lazy and do not differ in masculinity at all. In many respects, of course, they are right. But after all, it is women who most often bring up their sons in such a way that they grow up as infantile people. How to properly educate a boy so that he becomes a real man who is able to be responsible for his actions and people close to him? We will try to answer this difficult question in our article.

Developmental psychology

Education is a complex process that must begin at birth and continue throughout life. The ability of a man to engage in self-development in his mature years and acquire the very masculinity that women so want to see depends on how correct and successful it will be in childhood and adolescence.

If it is important for a child to feel the boundless protection and love of a mother in the first years of his life, then as they grow older, the example and authority of the father should occupy an increasingly significant place in the life of the boy.

At the age of 7, the baby begins a new, very important stage in his life - the beginning of growing up. It is this period that will become the base on which he will unconsciously rely all his life.

You can’t start raising your son at the age of 10 and expect good results from him. It's pointless. In order to understand how to properly educate a boy of this age, it is necessary to know the features of his psychophysical development in the period from 7 to 11 years.

These difficult years will become indicators of relationships in the family, will reveal all the mistakes of upbringing committed earlier.

special age

Parents begin to reap the first fruits of their upbringing with the onset of their son's decade. It is this age that is characterized by special changes in the physiology and psychology of the child.

In children of 10 years old, a rapid restructuring of the body begins, which is accompanied by the growth of the skeletal system and blood vessels. While the heart muscles do not always keep up with the rest of the organs.

The beginning of puberty causes the strongest hormonal changes, which are responsible for the deterioration of memory and attention, and the decrease in intellectual abilities. Moreover, the excitability of the nervous system significantly exceeds the processes of its inhibition, which is expressed in irritability and resentment, harsh judgments and the inability to control one's emotions.

Raising a 10 year old boy cannot be successful without taking into account all these physical and mental changes.

Psychological manifestations of age

A 10-year-old child clearly shows changes in relationships in the family. The boy is trying in every possible way to demonstrate his growing up and his own opinion on all issues. This is especially true of the relationship with the mother. He starts being rude and trying to prove his case.

Peak emotional and unstable behavior occurs at age eleven. By this age, with an incorrectly built line of family behavior, depressive states and immersion in oneself, manifestations of aggression and complete refusal to cooperate are possible.

Peers begin to have an increasing influence on a ten-year-old boy. Surrounded by peers, his behavior changes beyond recognition.

Educational activity is characterized by an unstable character: restlessness is suddenly replaced by thoughtfulness or excessive zeal.

Despite the external aggressive desire for independence, in these years, boys more than ever need support from their relatives. Not receiving the approval of loved ones, their anxieties and fears intensify, which leads to even greater isolation and aggressiveness.

Psychological studies have shown that boys of 11 years old have the lowest level of self-esteem compared to other age periods.

Team approval

If at the age of 7 for a boy the main motivational moment in his life was education, when there was an assessment of solvency in terms of educational achievements, then by the age of ten the situation begins to change. The boy no longer cares how the teacher evaluates him: the personal significance of himself is formed through authority among his peers. A fierce competition for leadership begins.

Starting from the age of eight, the child begins to study the boundaries of what is permitted, studying them more and more actively every year. Only boys explore this issue with practical actions that may end up breaking the law. The social development of children of 8 years old is gradually becoming more active.

At this time, it is important for parents to analyze every statement and statement of their son. During conversations, you should be unobtrusively interested in who the boy is friends with, what he does with friends. Get ready for the fact that a growing man will no longer share everything at once.

At the same time, you should not reassure yourself that your son is friends only with “decent” guys. These boys are also testing their limits, experimenting and proving their leadership.

In the children's team, a clear distribution of roles begins, and it is based on relationships with peers. As a rule, the position, determined by the team at the age of 8, becomes unshakable, and it is quite difficult for a boy to move to “another level”.

Leader, helper, weakling, scapegoat, nerd - this is an approximate list of basic positions that are most often distributed subconsciously.

Boys who know how to defend their position become leaders and their assistants. And more often
they only do it with the help of their fists. If for some reason a child cannot stand up for his “honor”, his authority among his peers drops sharply and it will be extremely difficult for him to correct the situation.

When raising children of this age, it is important to take into account the main contradiction: the desire to be the same as everyone else and stand out clearly among their peers. The self-affirmation of boys occurs due to friendship with older children, whose authority is unshakable for them. That is why at this age there is a great danger of addiction to bad habits and obscene expressions.

Requirements and control

When working with children, it is now very important to regulate the requirements and their submission. Recall that an adult is no longer an authority, so all demands and requests are perceived as wrong and unnecessary.

The child begins to determine for himself life values, which can often run counter to parental ideals. He does not yet fully understand their meaning and content, but he begins to vigorously defend them, entering into conflicts that seem stupid and meaningless to adults.

Moreover, the period of study in the middle link provides for the work of different teachers, each of which has its own position and requirements. The boy gradually moves "to his own territory", in which there is less and less room for adults.

Self-affirmation is an essential element of growing up. Stubbornness and unwillingness to be under the control of adults increasingly takes the form of conflict. Right now, the boys choose those requirements that they are ready to obey, since they do not violate their "sovereignty". The correct position of adults will allow them to make the right choice, because the whole future life position depends on it.

At the age of eight, the first emotional experiences associated with the opposite sex begin to appear. At the same time, boys do not know how to properly express their emotions. The task of adults is to direct them in the right direction, explaining that the manifestation of such feelings is natural and necessary.

In no case should you laugh at the boy's feelings, especially in the presence of peers! After all, you can undermine his authority, which it will be difficult for him to win again.

This period is dangerous experiments. The boys demonstrate their courage, strength and dexterity. Exactly
therefore, news reports are constantly updated with information about boys taking selfies on the roofs of high-rise buildings or moving trains. Violent fights, which must be recorded on a mobile phone camera, are another way to prove your courage.

Parents are obliged during this period to know as much as possible about their sons and to control their actions as unobtrusively as possible! Otherwise, the demonstration of superiority can end very badly.

Proper cooperation

How to raise a boy of 9 years old so that a real man grows out of him?

First of all, the upbringing of the boy during this period should be based on cooperation and trust. And on the trust of the son to the parents, and not vice versa.

Adults should enable the boy to realize himself in society, teach him to identify the most effective and correct ways of communication, correct low self-esteem and shortcomings. Only with the help of parents can personal contradictions be avoided.

If adults do not take an active part in the self-affirmation of their sons, encourage reasonable boundaries of freedom and the ability to defend their position correctly, this is fraught with the following consequences:

The child becomes aggressive, thus expressing a protest against the rejection of adults;
Cynicism and manipulation of human weaknesses appear, and parents most often come under fire;
Hypocrisy and weakness will become a manifestation of self-affirmation through intrigue and adaptation to circumstances;
The inability to protect oneself from the manifestation of aggression of the stronger is expressed in the constant search for patrons. Such boys in male society are usually called "sixes".

To avoid such developmental malformations, raising children of this age should help meet the two most important needs:

The need to communicate with peers. It is important to encourage any communication with peers outside the school walls;
The need to assert one's own tastes and preferences. Let the boy choose games, friends or clothes on his own. After all, the formation of one's own opinion and line of behavior is possible only by trial and error.

Remember! These are not maturing sons who must adapt to your value system. It is you, the parents, who must be able to readjust in time and learn to cooperate with your child. The difficult period of growing up does not tolerate authoritarianism, it needs partnership.

Find the golden mean between severity and affection. Both are vital for growing boys;
The child should feel that parents will always come to the rescue, support in any situation. Help should not consist in punishing the offender, but in clarifying the conflict situation, with its full analysis;
Give the boy freedom of choice, only in this way can he grow up as a man who is aware of the responsibility for the act he has done;
Do not criticize, but suggest;
Don't let your son feel humiliated: don't insult him;
Love your child and be sure to tell him about this love as often as possible. Regardless of age, the son wants to know that his parents love him not for his achievements, but for the fact that he is their son.

Raising a child of 10-11 years old is a difficult task. Only those parents who managed to show maximum respect and love for their maturing son during this difficult period will be able to cope with it.

Hello, sobsna, the question is in the header.

Given: girl 12 years old, parents divorced. There is an opportunity to move to an EU country from Kazakhstan for permanent residence. When moving there is support in the form of a bilingual school, positive relatives with children the same age as my daughter, my excellent job, good prospects in every sense.

She wrote about divorced parents for a reason. The daughter is not against and not for the idea of moving, she says that we need to think about it. I know that the former mother-in-law has a great influence on her (more even blackmail, they say, my heart will break without you, etc.) and if she finds out, then it is quite possible that she will put pressure on the child. It is possible that the father will also connect.

I don't want to take my daughter to a country with better prospects. If possible, we will fly once a year to meet with relatives. I'm not going to stop talking to anyone.

What arguments would you give?

My sun is 11 years old (daughter).
I feel my complete failure, like a mother. If you deprive me of everything, I will lie and spit on the ceiling.
Swimming, we know.
But spans of land will not yield. At a certain time, the lessons are not ready - do not care, it does not touch the homework. About prospects with such an attitude to life and the impossibility of reaching at least the passing of the OGE, it was said and discussed with me and my grandmother (with hysterical screams these conversations) a thousand and one times. Physical punishment took place.
She realized that she was even more angry.
The story about life in a box and a certain social circle did not particularly inspire her.
A priori, I'm sure she'll be no good.
Everyone else can have any opinion.
I will soon go to Kashchenko for permanent residence.
Colossal self-doubt, covers it with indifference: I don’t care at all.
I don’t like any subjects, it’s true that English is very good. Objectively. In all schools she was noted for this.
Got B1 last year.
I sang odes to her for 2-3 months, then I say: come on, Marin, you will be trained at B2.
A set of vowels in response, she won’t, she doesn’t need it, nothing will come of it, herself, they say, mom, hand it over.
The fact that I have all these certificates is all the same.
I sent models to school, came on the first day with tears. Some girl older than her threw in her face: why did you get up here? Go away.
Her daughter brushed her off in response, she cried at home that she did not want to go until the temperature rose.
All teachers, coaches repeat the same thing, independently of each other: not a fool, an excellent memory, due to which he sometimes leaves, but a terrible lazy person, he does not know how and does not want to work in a team.
And she insists that there are no people who do not like freebies. Even she would like to earn a living by renting out premises.
He doesn’t want to strain at all. He even cleans up the plates after himself with a fight.
Her father lives separately.
They see each other every 2 months - McDonald's and a movie according to the standard scheme. Often he promises to come to her, breaks her off. She sits at home and waits for his call all day. This happened repeatedly.
She was the first time he had in the summer at the dacha for 10-12 days.
She learned to ride an ATV, he let her drive a motorcycle. She left with tears.

She herself has two higher educations, one of which she received for herself. Grandmother is a gold medalist, she believes that she should study perfectly.
So, the grandmother is not an example, but an annoying factor. The daughter once said to her face: she herself went crazy at school, and you get me.
Hands are already lowered. I wanted to swim, shoot, photographic studio, you are welcome.
And as efforts are needed, the boar fell and paws to the side.
Sorry, this is a very sore subject.

355

I must say right away that the child is not mine, my close friend
girl 8 years old 2nd grade.
been multiple times! seen stealing money from father/mother
1) I found a stash in the book, took it for myself, found 5000 banknotes from a child
2) the father left money for his wife, let it be on the table, the child took it, returned it for 300 rubles. less by tossing the rest in mom's bag
3) mom returned 1000 rubles to dad - the child at some point took it from his father from the pocket of his clothes
4) the day before yesterday, dad stayed with the child, mom is on a business trip (this is important)
the child pulled out 1000 rubles from his pants pocket, the father noticed quickly, because went to the store half an hour after this moment, and this was all done in front of the father, the child fussed next to the clothes (in the afternoon) (((
the conversation was serious (in the evening), without mom!!! (she was away)
the child did not return the money, she said that she had spent it !!!
it doesn’t fit in my head how in a couple of hours an 8-year-old child can spend 1000 rubles.
I told my friend that we need to figure it out to the end, that it could be something serious...
From the forum I'm waiting for versions of advice, what should I do?
I was brought up in such a way that you can’t take anything from someone else’s, including from bags / pockets, my child is the same ((((
if I don't answer right away, sorry.
read everything!!!

102

We had a discussion at work on this topic. Two colleagues have daughters in the 2nd grade of the same school, but the classes themselves are different. One older colleague (over 40), daughter in 2B, another young (slightly over 30), daughter in 2A. The whole parallel had a holiday of autumn the other day. A group of children in grade 2B performed with a song, performing it with dance elements. The girls were dressed in tulle skirts and a T-shirt, which was tied in a knot on the stomach, and a strip of the body 5-7 cm was visible between the top and bottom. This is what caused the controversy. The younger one and another half of the team were indignant that this was an obscene appearance for second-graders, that this was an unacceptable demonstration of sexuality at such a young age, girls should not show their navels. The second colleague, and with her the other half of the team, did not see anything obscene in such an appearance and considered that this was just a stage image and there was no sexuality here at all. On whose side I was - while I will not say anything.
It became interesting opinion from the outside. Do you think this appearance of girls on stage is acceptable or is it obscene?

95
And after all, I didn’t start upbringing, from a toddler age I explain what is right, what is not .... I did it, and I myself don’t set a bad example .. I don’t drink, I don’t smoke, I don’t lead some kind of wild life .... at home clean, prepared, well-groomed children .... I try to entertain them as much as possible, I take them on different trips. He is a difficult child from birth, I don’t even remember the first year really because of his constant ora. Then it seemed to become easier .... in the garden, too, there were constant complaints, they even wanted to send them to the garden for the rest, barely fought back .... disobedience, absolutely does nothing that is asked. There is no aggression.

He goes to a regular school, studies averagely, and only because we catch up with the material at home, the teachers have already scored on him.

Today in the morning brought to hysterics, shaking so far. I don't know what to do, I can't take it anymore!

563

Many parents notice how is changing their child at 10 years old, at what pace is growing and develops. Especially girls. What can I say - this is the first stage of the transitional age.

Physiological features

At 10 years old, the child stretches, growth its average is 134 - 140 cm, weight 34 - 36 kg.

going on hormonal body change. Girls develop faster than boys body some of them change: the chest is formed, the hips are rounded. This leads to embarrassment and embarrassment.

End up changing teeth. As a rule, all dairy ones fell out, indigenous ones grew in their place. Visit once every six months dentist for the prevention of caries and improper growth of teeth.

Psychological and mental development of ten-year-old children

Primary activity - educational. But in addition to complete immersion in learning, more and more children are drawn to communicate with peers.

Children are already understand and they can explain. And communication with people begins to build "in an adult way." More compete with each other in strength, wit, clothes, accessories and more.

The children's team already has leaders, there are outcasts, internal interest groups have developed. Opinion buddies is very important. The child is moving away from his parents more and more, he wants to be an adult, but you can negotiate with him, talk He still needs parenting advice.

Many psychologists believe that an important step in the development of the personality of a child of primary school age is the emergence of "adulthood".

Indicators of the emergence of "adulthood"

The child wants to be treated like an adult.
The child wants to independently, as an adult, complete the task (for example, go shopping himself).
He hides some personal affairs, conversations. Doesn't want adults to interfere.
Tries to defend his own position.

Parents need

Talk to your child about a variety of topics, including security on the street, at home, about the dangers of smoking, alcohol and psychoactive substances, as well as about sexual maturation and relationships with the opposite sex.
To control study and extracurricular activities: visiting circles and sections.
Know children and, preferably, families of children with whom the child is friends and walks.
Show private example.
Define home duties child (for example, taking out the trash, cleaning your room).
follow food child and sleep (at least 9-10 hours).
Limit watching TV shows, movies, computer games, as well as to control visits and communication on the Internet.

Reading 11 min.

The upbringing of children 10-12 years old should take into account the psychological characteristics of the period, as well as with the appearance in the child of a sense of independence. During this period, puberty begins, which seriously affects the behavior of a teenager.

At the age of 11, children experience the peak of emotional instability, and the behavior of adults towards them should be especially careful, but at the same time firm.

Mistakes in upbringing in the period from 10 to 12 years lead to serious psychological problems in the period of older adolescence, which lasts from 13 to 15-16 years.

Features of children at 10-12 years old

The child is more and more drawn to peers. Boys and girls prefer to be friends with children of the same gender. The emerging interest in the opposite sex remains hidden for the time being and outwardly sometimes manifests itself only as small aggressive attacks (mockery, pushing, name-calling, etc.)
The motor activity of the child increases: he walks a lot and quickly, runs. The distance that children cover at 10-12 years old and their speed doubles compared to the previous age period.
Children develop stable interests that often last a lifetime. They can be connected both with the choice of a future profession, and with a hobby.
Children become even more curious, want to know everything about everything, actively absorb information from different sources. The child is interested in the conversations of adults. Of course, he does not understand everything, but he listens, observes their behavior and communication style, reflects, draws his conclusions.
In connection with the beginning changes in physiology and psychology, complexes and self-doubt may begin to appear in children at this age. Therefore, it is important to be patient, praise them for their skills, achievements and correct behavior in order to prevent a decrease in self-esteem.

Sexual development of children at 10-12 years old

Sex education is a particularly important stage in the process of personality formation. The main task falls on the parents, who should be able to prepare the teenager for what changes in his body will occur.

Girls, first of all, must be correctly brought to the understanding that they will begin menstruation, which at first will be unstable and can go wrong for several months. It is not enough just to tell the child that his body has matured. The mother should explain to her daughter in detail what is happening to her. It is also necessary to teach the girl how to properly care for herself during menstruation.

Special attention should be paid to ensuring that the teenager does not see anything indecent and shameful in the change taking place in the body. It is important that the girl does not have a guilt and shame complex due to menstruation, which occurs if she is brushed aside when she wants to know about what is happening to her.

In boys, hormonal changes also begin between the ages of 10 and 12, and adolescents are faced with such a phenomenon as wet dreams. Parents need to prepare their son for this so that he does not experience shock and does not perceive what is happening as something shameful, requiring constant concealment. It is better that the father conducts the conversation, as in this case the boy will be less shy. At the same time, if the son is in a more trusting relationship with his mother, it is better for her to talk to him.

Conducting sexual education of a child at the age of 10-12, one must take into account the fact that talking about puberty always causes embarrassment in children. You can not make fun of a son or daughter or somehow, even without malice, humiliate them. A teenager must understand that, despite adult sexual manifestations, his body is not yet ready for procreation. Before that, it should be fully formed.

In the same period, it is necessary to gradually begin to explain to children about the need to comply with certain safety rules during sexual intercourse. Also at the same time it is necessary to explain that too early (before 16 years) sexual life leads to health problems, especially in girls.

The development of a child at 10-12 years old, what he should know and be able to

During the period of early adolescence, which lasts from 9.5 to 12-12.5 years, children move from a dependent position to an independent person who can fully take care of himself. At this age, regardless of gender, children should be able to:

clean up the apartment;
use a washing machine and wash small items by hand;
cook simple meals with or without a stove;
wash yourself and observe all necessary hygiene rules;
wash up;
plan your personal time and distribute tasks depending on their importance;
stand up for your opinion and accept constructive, justified criticism;
stand up for oneself;
get out of awkward situations;
accurately follow the instructions given by the parents;
seek help from emergency services and clearly explain what is happening;
distribute and accumulate pocket money;
take care of pets;
be responsible for your actions;
look after the younger ones;
analyze actions and their consequences.

From the age of 11, a teenager should be able to navigate the store in the composition of products and choose them not according to the attractiveness of the packaging.

From the age of 12, children become quite independent and can be left alone at home for the whole day. At the same time, they are already able to heat or cook their own food, allocate time for work and rest.

In early adolescence, the child must fully master the school subjects. He also already knows and clearly understands that he is a person who has rights and obligations, as well as responsibility for his actions.

How to raise a child at 10-12 years old

Be very attentive to the opinion of the child. At this age, he has his own point of view on almost everything. If you do not learn to respect his views, then in adolescence he will either respond with a violent protest at attempts to “shut him up”, or close in on himself and stop expressing his opinion, which is no less dangerous.
Try not to use harsh phrases when communicating with your child, do not be overly categorical. The expressions “I forbid you”, “You are obliged”, “Because I said so!” etc. will be met by your child extremely negatively and will only cause resistance. If you think his behavior is inappropriate or you do not like one of his friends, say so calmly, argue your point of view (get used to doing this all the time), and express your feelings. Be sure to listen to your child.
Do not hide your fears and concerns for the child under the mask of severity and inflexibility. Openness and sincerity in communicating with him will help maintain a warm trusting relationship between you.
Pay attention to what your child is interested in at this age, in order to contribute to his inclusion in a particular activity. By the beginning of adolescence, your child should have one or more useful hobbies (creative or sports), then it is easier to direct his energy in the right direction.
Your ability to trust your child begins to play an increasingly important role. Demonstrate with all your behavior that you do not doubt him, provide a reasonable degree of independence and initiative, designate his area of responsibility. You cannot forbid children to want to become adults, but it is important to show that this is not so easy.
Accept the child as he is, do not compare with others. He should feel loved and protected no matter what the conditions.
Create conditions for confidential conversations with your child. If you want him to communicate more with you, do not build a conversation in the form of an interrogation, that is, do not use many questions at once that require one-word answers ("yes" or "no"). Ask the child how his day went, what he learned new, what he thinks about any phenomenon, etc. It is open questions that stimulate communication. Remember that before bed, children are more inclined to sincere conversation, and use this time to show tenderness and kindness.
Always maintain eye contact when talking to your child. And don't forget the importance of touch. Supportive hugs help you feel accepted and protected.

When educating relatives and teachers, one should take into account the psychological state of a teenager and the fact that he goes through a period of self-determination and the development of independence. The experiences associated with puberty are also taken into account.

Children need to be supported in undertakings and showing initiative. You can not be treated with irony or disrespect for personality and appearance. This age period instills a lot of complexes with improper behavior on the part of parents.

Relatives should not put pressure on a teenager and force him to accept their opinion, regardless of his own. A son or daughter should be able to express their views and, according to individual preferences, choose their own clothes and hobbies (if they are not dangerous).

Do not resist the manifestation of their emotions. In order not to lose contact with children at the moment of emotional instability, when they react to everything excessively violently and defiantly, and tantrums can suit prohibitions, one must not resist the manifestations of their emotions. After a surge that finds no barriers, the children are ready for a constructive conversation, as they do not feel opposition from adults and the need to fight for interests. They realize that a calm conversation with reasoned arguments gives a lot more.
A place for freedom. Control over the lives of children in a number of areas should be weakened. You should not strictly dictate what clothes to wear (you can only express your opinion, but without using guilt-inducing words: “well”, “your business”, “whatever you want” and “I don’t like it”). For example, if you want to convince a growing daughter that the dress she chose does not suit her, it is better to do this by explaining that it hides her strengths and creates the effect of non-existent flaws.
Appropriate appraisal. Parents should not underestimate or overestimate the external data of children. Both will cause complexes. It is necessary not to poke at the shortcomings, but in a mild form to show the teenager what weaknesses he has in appearance, and how they can be hidden or even turned into advantages, characterizing them as an individual feature.

The daily routine of a child at 10-12 years old

Compliance with the strict implementation of the daily regimen turns out to be difficult, since at this age adolescent independence begins to manifest itself. During this period, parents must make compromises to maintain the correct rhythm of the day in children. It is also necessary not only to indicate when and what to do, but should, with reasonable arguments, explain to the son or daughter why this is necessary and how not following the schedule will harm them.

It is also necessary to allow the teenager to experience the disadvantages of violations. For example, if he sat in front of a TV or computer until late at night, then in the morning he will not be able to easily wake up to school, and during the day he will suffer from poor health. Faced with this, it is unlikely that you will want to repeat the mistake.

Classes with a child 10-12 years old

In early adolescence, awareness of one's interests and abilities begins. Children develop inclinations for creativity or abilities for the exact sciences, as well as sports. Classes should become, as it were, the interaction of two personalities, in which one does not dominate the other. Parents help to learn new skills and support children in this, but do not do everything for them, allowing them to overcome difficulties and feel satisfaction that they succeeded.

Games and toys for children aged 10-12

Toys that interested children at an early age turn into the quality of guarded and carefully kept talismans, which they do not part with, but do not play with them anymore. For boys and girls, complex puzzles, radio-controlled models, logic board games and computer games become the main toys.

The latter should not be forbidden, as this will only lead to their becoming especially desirable. However, it is necessary to dose the time spent behind the monitor, organizing for the child no less exciting pastime, preferably with a sports bias.

Any toys should be bought only with the interests of the teenager in mind, so that they do not become a disappointment. In most cases, children want to receive various sports equipment as a gift.

When raising a boy or a girl, relatives need to first analyze their behavior. It should be aimed at the formation of an independent and full-fledged personality, and not at manipulating the child in order to keep him around him.

Often parents unconsciously try to instill in their children a sense of guilt and duty to them, which, in their opinion, can save their sons and daughters from mistakes and disappointments. As a result of such an illiterate approach, they only achieve that children either acquire a mass of complexes and cannot live fully, or break off relations with loved ones as early as possible, wanting to finally become a person.