Matchmaking by the bride: what to say. Matchmaking in our days - are customs and traditions respected

Even before discussing the celebration itself, the bride and groom decide whether to arrange a traditional Russian matchmaking or a Western one. However, more and more often, the bride and groom give preference to long-standing Russian customs and rituals designed to protect the young family from adversity. Whether the groom should woo or whether it is an outdated custom and the consent of the bride is enough is a moot point. Matchmaking is not always arranged for the sake of traditions and protection from evil spirits, it is also a veiled acquaintance of the relatives of the bride and groom, as well as a great way to have fun.

Of course, the observance of absolutely all Russian traditions in our time is impossible, so the bride and groom can choose some of them, the most pleasant and cheerful. From those rituals that seem absurd, it is quite possible to refuse. For example, it used to be customary for a girl to meet the matchmakers silently, sitting by the stove, with her back to the guests, and the matchmakers, entering the house, slammed the doors three times. Looking for a stove and slamming doors in the house of the bride's parents these days doesn't seem like a good idea. The simpler and more fun the matchmaking is, the better.

How to marry the groom's parents

According to the rules, the groom's parents must be present at the matchmaking. This does not mean that they must necessarily be matchmakers. Previously, professional matchmakers were hired for this. They, being subtle psychologists, skillfully conducted a conversation with the bride's parents.

    • If, nevertheless, the role of matchmakers is performed by the groom's parents, then at the entrance to the house they must say the classic “You have goods, we have a merchant” and praise the groom in every possible way. This matchmaking item is optional, but it can be quite fun. The times when the owners could refuse matchmakers, disgracing them to the whole village, are long gone. Matchmakers actively praise the groom, and the bride's parents jokingly belittle his dignity. In such a comic form, the meeting of matchmakers takes place, and the bride, in the absence of a stove, may well be hiding in her room.
    • After the matchmakers convinced the bride's parents that it would be better not to find the groom, the guests were invited to the table, and negotiations began. So, the dignity of the bride, the cost of the wedding were discussed. Nowadays, roles can be assigned. For example, the groom's parents are looking for and , and the bride's parents are looking for and .
    • In the past, matchmaking was more magnificent than a wedding. Now this is no longer relevant, since the bulk of the guests come precisely to the wedding. Therefore, it is not necessary to excel in treats or lead everyone to a restaurant. It will be enough if the owners feed the matchmakers so that they are full and satisfied.
    • The groom's parents can bring a towel embroidered in a special way, if they wish. But modern matchmaking does not lose its charm even without a towel.
    • If the matchmakers and the groom's parents nevertheless decided to observe the rite of slamming doors, they should be careful in this matter. It will be somewhat unpleasant if guests damage an expensive front door or slopes. This is a purely symbolic gesture designed to deceive evil spirits. The first time they slam the door lightly, the second - a little harder, and then they come in.
  • The groom's parents should be more correct when "examining" the bride. Previously, such an inspection could reach the point of absurdity, but now it needs to be turned into a joke. To belittle the dignity of the bride, thereby knocking down the price of the ransom, must be extremely careful so that the future wife does not remember later on every anniversary how the matchmakers offended her. You can, for example, ask: “Does the girl know how to sew and wash, is she a good housewife? Her hands are so white and well-groomed. And in any case, do not mention the defects in appearance - crooked teeth, too thin, etc.

Is it possible to get married without the groom's parents

There are times when the groom's parents cannot be present at the matchmaking for one reason or another. If they are alive, healthy and live nearby, but for some reason could not come, after the matchmaking, the bride and groom can visit them.

Often, young suitors resort to the help of matchmakers, while men over 30 prefer to do everything on their own. If, nevertheless, the groom comes alone, he must independently think over all his steps.

    • The groom must buy flowers before the matchmaking and be responsible in choosing a bouquet. should be gentle, but magnificent, and the bouquet for the future mother-in-law should be modest, but refined. In order not to offend anyone, you should not make this contrast too strong. For example, it would be indecent to arrive with a huge bouquet of tea roses for the bride and three tulips for her mother.
    • Any relatives or even friends can be matchmakers, but the groom himself can make a speech in front of the bride's parents. In this case, he must think it over in advance. The groom needs to remember that his task is not to tell how he loves the bride, but to praise himself beloved so that the girl's parents want to accept such a son-in-law.
    • Previously, even the most enviable groom could not get final consent to matchmaking. The bride's parents could choose a worthy husband for their daughter for years. But now this is a symbolic ritual, so the groom can calm down and come up with something sweet and a little fun instead of pathos.
    • The first rule of good matchmaking is that the groom should not drink alcohol "for the sake of comfort" even before he arrives at the house of the bride's parents. Even if relations with the girl's parents have long been established and turned into friendly ones, you should not spoil the holiday with such troubles.
  • In addition to flowers, the groom can buy a bottle of champagne or good wine, as well as treats (sweets, a heart-shaped cake, etc.). For the sake of observing traditions, champagne is not immediately shown, since purely theoretically there is a possibility of refusal. The groom should not be too obvious to show confidence that he will be accepted.
  • Do not forget about

There are moments in a person's life that are especially important for him. One of them is marriage. The importance of this event is emphasized by the fact that they begin to prepare for it long before the significant date. Over the long history of the existence of the institution of marriage in Russia, many traditions have arisen related to the organization of a future wedding.

In this regard, it is especially necessary to highlight such a ritual as matchmaking, the customs of which are rooted in the fact that earlier the fate of future spouses often depended not so much on mutual feelings, but on the decision of the parents of the bride and groom, who agreed among themselves. The matchmaking ritual contributed to this. In general, he performed several significant functions. With its help, the girl's relatives were notified of the intention of the potential spouse to marry her. Further, the parents of the possible bride had to either agree or refuse the matchmakers. In addition, the tradition of matchmaking involved the public announcement of the intention of two families to intermarry.

In general, the ritual was carried out as follows. In order for the matchmaking to take place, the customs ordered the young man to first inform his parents about his desire to marry the girl he liked. Without securing their consent, he could not play the wedding. Then the future groom had to send matchmakers to the house of his chosen one, who were the male relatives of the groom, and necessarily already married. Usually this role was played by the father, relative or godfather, as well as an uncle or older brother. However, sometimes, when matchmaking was conceived, customs allowed the participation of women, for example, a godmother or aunt. Finally, in Russia they also resorted to the services of professional matchmakers or matchmakers who became adept at arranging weddings and painted the merits of their clients in every way. Sometimes the power of the groom's parents reached the point that it was they who chose the future bride for their son, not particularly interested in his opinion. The criteria for considering candidates were the well-being and family of the girl.

After the choice was made, the matchmakers dressed up beautifully and on the best horses went directly to the matchmaking itself. The customs related to this trip were quite strict. So, the road to the bride's house was not supposed to be straight, but roundabout. In addition, on the way, the matchmakers, if possible, should not stop anywhere and talk to anyone. At the same time, according to popular beliefs, the best time for the matchmaking ceremony came after. In this case, the likelihood that someone could jinx the event was minimized.

Entering the house of the bride's parents, the matchmaker had to sit in a place strictly designated for this, which immediately showed the owners the purpose of the visit. However, it was not customary to proceed immediately to the matchmaking itself. To begin with, the conversation touched on the weather, harvest, etc., only then, with the help of hints, the intentions of the guests were indicated. At the same time, the potential bride was called indirectly, for example, “Kulichka”, “chicken”, “goods”, and the groom, respectively, “hunter”, “cockerel”, “merchant”. Finally, the hosts expressed gratitude to the matchmakers for the high honor rendered and offered to go to the table, at which direct negotiations about the wedding were already underway. The decisive vote in agreeing or disagreeing with the marriage belonged to the girl's father. In his absence - brother or mother. While conducting a conversation, the matchmakers, on the one hand, tried to present the groom in the best possible way, and on the other hand, they tried to find out everything possible about the bride. The girl herself during such negotiations was obliged to appear in the room from time to time, pouring drinks and demonstrating her most beautiful and rich outfits. This gave the matchmakers the opportunity to better see the bride, to follow her behavior.

As a rule, the first time an agreement on marriage was not concluded. The head of the family took a break to wait, whether there would be a better offer from some other suitor, and also, in turn, finding out about the already existing applicant. It happened that the matchmakers could be pointed to the threshold. In this case, the guests, leaving such unkind hosts, closed the door of the house with their backs. This action was intended to ward off good luck from an inhospitable home and prevent the daughter of such obstinate people from quickly marrying. If, after the preliminary matchmaking, the bride's parents were not against marriage, the matchmakers would come a second time after a certain time. Here there was already quite a business conversation, in particular, the so-called “row entry” was compiled, which was a kind of prototype of the modern one. It stipulated the timing of the future wedding, the amount of expenses for it, the number of guests, etc.

When both sides agreed on everything, the girl handed over to her betrothed a handkerchief, which served as a kind of guarantee of their future relationship. The matchmaker received a loaf of bread wrapped in a scarf, which he then showed to the whole village as a sign of a successful outcome. On this, the ritual of matchmaking came to an end. Now the families of the future spouses could move on to the next stages of preparation for the wedding.

As you can see, customs were regulated in great detail. All the rituals associated with it were strictly observed for a long time, primarily in peasant families. In the privileged strata of Russian society, these traditions died out faster, mixing with foreign patterns of behavior.

Much has changed over time, and today, couples who wish to tie the knot are increasingly making the decision themselves. Many refuse not only the very process of matchmaking, as such, but even weddings are made as Europeanized as possible. And there are couples who honor the traditions of matchmaking, and certainly want to observe, if possible, all the rules and customs.

Nowadays, it is already very different from the ancient rituals, but, nevertheless, the roots of this tradition come precisely from the ancient customs of matchmaking.


Even before the matchmaking, it was customary to arrange a bride. The groom and his relatives went home to the bride. It was customary for the groom to be accompanied by an older brother, uncle or godfather. Such a visit was arranged so that the groom and his attendants could appreciate the beauty of the bride, her talents and skills, and could understand whether she was suitable for him as a wife. If the bride was successful, and the bride liked the groom, then soon matchmakers were sent to the bride's house.

It was very important to choose the right day for the matchmaking. It was not customary to arrange matchmaking on Wednesdays and Fridays, as well as on the 13th day of the month. Most often they got married on October 14th. This day fell on the church feast of the Intercession of the Most Holy Theotokos, and autumn was considered the most suitable time for such matters, since garden and field work was completed, and there was time for other things.

This ceremony was usually noisy and fun. Costumed matchmakers sang songs at the bride's house, praising her virtues.

MATCHING CUSTOMS

  1. It was customary to meet matchmakers at the doorstep of the house and invite them to the house three times. Only after the third invitation did the matchmakers accept him and enter the house, making sure that they were really expected here and they were welcome here.
  2. At the matchmaking in the bride's house, it was even customary to sit down in a special way, and not to anyone as they wanted.
  3. It was customary not to immediately start talking about the reason for the visit of the matchmakers. At first, conversations were conducted on general, not so significant topics, and gradually the conversation approached the topic of matchmaking.
  4. Of course, the bride was not allowed to enter into a conversation, she should have sat silently, turning away from the guests, doing some business.
  5. It was also established that the bride could change up to five outfits during the visit of the matchmakers. Thus, she demonstrated the wealth of the family and her girlish beauty.


Sometimes matchmakers examined the bride very meticulously in order to find flaws and reduce the amount of the ransom.
And by the glass in the hands of the groom, one could understand whether he liked the bride or not.

If the groom drank the glass at once and completely, it meant that the bride was to his liking. If the groom only sipped a little, it meant that he did not like the bride.

But the bride could also put the pumpkin to the groom. This, in turn, indicated that the groom did not like the bride's parents and they gave him a turn from the gate.

During the conversation, the parents of the bride and the matchmakers were bargaining. The final decision to marry off the daughter to this groom or not was made, of course, by the father of the bride.

It was even acceptable that having once been refused, matchmakers from the same groom could invite the same bride to marry again. The father of the bride, meanwhile, had the opportunity to choose his daughter a more suitable, in his opinion, party.

MODERN MATCHING

The modern ceremony of matchmaking, as before, provides for the presence of the groom, matchmakers and relatives of the newlyweds.. But, nevertheless, matchmaking in our time is significantly different from the ceremony, which was customary to carry out in Russia in antiquity. Now few people prepare a speech in verse and go to woo with songs and dances. And in most cases, matchmaking today obviously ends with the consent of the parties.

In modern times, the groom's parents can come to woo on their own, or they can take matchmakers with them. Now you can even resort to the help of professional matchmakers in such a delicate matter. It is customary for male matchmakers to be married at the time of the matchmaking, this requirement does not apply to women.

WHAT FORMALITIES SHOULD MATTERS BE COMPLIED TODAY


If there is no matchmaker, these words are spoken by the matchmaker. In the tradition of matchmaking, it is also customary to praise the groom and ask the bride to demonstrate her housekeeping skills. After that, the girl is usually praised and admired for her talents.

If the girl agrees to get married, then she is asked to divide the loaf and distribute its parts to her parents and guests. The last part is left to the young couple. It is customary to cut the loaf into 4 equal parts. The completion of the matchmaking is the blessing of the parents of the young and a festive feast.

The courtship of the bride was one of the wedding ceremonies that preceded the wedding itself. This tradition was dedicated to obtaining the prior consent of the bride's relatives and friends for the wedding. Today, this tradition is not a bright and festive event, we simply forgot this tradition. This tradition in our time is expressed in the form of a meeting of two parties in order to resolve organizational issues regarding a future wedding.

Matchmaking in Russia originated a long time ago, its main task was to conclude property agreements that served as the basis for a new marriage. Quite often before the matchmaking passed the bride. As soon as the young man decided on the choice of a “worthy” girl, he informed his parents about his decision. After such a message, the relatives of the future groom began to scrupulously collect all the information about his beloved, the well-being of her family and all her ancestors. If the collected information was positive and met the requirements of the groom's family, then an unspoken family council was held in his house, at which the godfather or elder brother convened matchmakers or invited matchmakers, who were sent to the bride's house.

According to Russian traditions, either the godparents of the groom, or his closest relatives - an uncle, an older brother, acted as matchmakers. In Russia, the matchmaker was also of particular importance, which was the groom's mother. However, it also happened that the matchmaking was carried out by a woman who was respected in the village and had extensive experience in this matter. Turning to the matchmaker for help was an honor, because it was believed that she would be able to carry out this event more successfully than the groom's mom and dad. Later, a matchmaker began to be called a woman who had unmarried girls in mind, and who recommended them to parents or men who turned to her. Her services were very popular, because there was confidence that the ritual would go "without a hitch."

Of interest is the fact that in the old days in Russia not only boys, but also girls wooed. However, this moment did not take root among the people, therefore, basically, speaking of matchmaking, it means matchmaking on the part of the groom.

Matchmakers came to the girl's parental home and in an allegorical form knew about the guy's desire to marry this girl. With the consent of the parents, the first ritual evening was held in their house, where the event was told to close relatives from both sides.

In order for the ceremony of courtship of the bride to be successfully carried out, according to tradition, certain ritual actions and precautions based on the belief in omens had to be performed. The superstition of people to certain dates and days of the week is reflected in wedding traditions. In particular, Wednesday and Friday were considered unfavorable days for marriage, so no events related to the wedding could be scheduled on these days. The number 13 was also considered unfavorable, so they strictly ensured that this tradition and the wedding itself did not fall on this number. Numbers such as 3, 5, 7, 9 for this ceremony and wedding were special. It was believed that these numbers bring happiness and good luck. Most often, they went to woo after sunset, probably to prevent the evil eye or damage). As soon as the matchmakers left the house of the chosen one, someone from the female half of the household tied all the available pokers and tongs together. It was believed that this action attracts good luck in business.

There were also other wedding signs and superstitions among the people. For example, going to the house to woo, a person should not have met with anyone, much less talk. And when he approached the right door, at first he lightly touched the jamb with his hand and shoulder, and then knocked on the door. After an invitation to enter the house, the matchmaker and his "assistant" entered, were baptized on the image, and only then began to speak. It is also interesting that those who came along with the matchmaker during the conversation tried to imperceptibly for others to touch the leg of the table at which the conversation was being conducted. The bride remained silent throughout the ceremony and, according to tradition, changed her best outfits three times. During the matchmaking, there was also a rite of testing the future wife, in which the girl had to go to the center of the room and show her talents and skills. If the bride was from a family of lacemakers, then, to demonstrate her dexterity, she threw bobbins from one hand to the other, and then carried out the lace woven for the wedding towel. According to Russian custom, the groom, turning to the parents of his beloved, talks about his feelings and asks them for her hand.

After the courtship, according to custom, the groom and his parents went out into the hallway or onto the porch to exchange opinions about the bride, even if they knew her very well. Then the mother of the future wife brought the groom a glass of drink. If he drank the contents, then he liked the bride, therefore, there would be a wedding, if the groom only sipped the drink and returned it back - this meant that there would be no wedding.

But in Ukraine, on the contrary, the choice was made by the side of the bride. If the groom was not to their liking, he was given a pumpkin or "garbuz". When the matchmakers left, they usually closed the door with their backs, which was a kind of curse that did not portend marriage. But if the bride's parents and her relatives liked the guy, the young people were called the bride and groom, the wedding day was appointed and a joint council was already held.

Today, matchmaking is more dynamic. As a rule, on the appointed day and time indicated by the bride, the future groom comes to the house of his beloved's parents. Since the event is still solemn, the groom must be dressed appropriately for the occasion (a suit with a tie), and also purchase two bouquets of flowers, one of which will be intended for the future bride, and the other for her mother. In addition, the guy must buy symbolic gifts for the parents of his future wife.

Often the visit of the future groom is timed to coincide with a family celebration, which creates a more relaxed atmosphere. The matchmaker, as a rule, is the father of the guy, a relative of advanced age, the godfather, or a close friend of the parents. Other relatives of the groom may also take part in this ceremony. Parents express their consent in the form of a union of the right hand of the daughter with the hand of the future son-in-law.

If for some reason the parents did not take part in this event, the bride should also pay them a visit and get to know each other. At the same time, she must prepare a bouquet for her future mother-in-law in advance. During matchmaking, positive psychological relationships between future relatives are determined. After the event, the future married couple arranges a meeting for their parents. Moreover, the meeting can be held on either side. At the festive table, parents discuss all organizational issues related to the wedding: the venue, the choice of toastmaster, the preparation of the menu, who will pay, where the young people will live, etc.

It used to be accepted that all the expenses associated with the wedding, the family of the future husband takes over. Today, the parents of the young can distribute this item of wedding worries at their discretion. Often, young people pay for their wedding celebration on their own.

Content

Today, the ceremony of matchmaking is a more fun process than in the days of our ancestors. As a rule, on this solemn day, the groom, in an appropriate outfit, with a tie and suit, comes to visit the parents of his future wife. The young man has two bouquets of flowers with him, he gives one of them to his chosen one, the second to his future mother-in-law. Russian traditions provide for the ceremony of matchmaking, when the groom proposes to the girl, while he does not address herself, but her parents.

Features of the ceremony

To ask for a girl's hand, it is not necessary to choose a specific day, it is enough to choose a family holiday, so there will be a homely atmosphere. Together with the young man, his parents, friends or other close relatives can also visit the bride's house. If the girl's parents agree to the wedding, they give their blessing and put their daughter's hand to the guy.

In some cases, the groom's parents cannot be present at the matchmaking, in which case, after the ceremony, the future newlyweds come to visit them. The girl gives a bouquet of flowers to her future second mother when she comes to visit the groom's parents. As a rule, matchmaking helps to establish a positive psychological contact between relatives, to create a trusting relationship. After everything went well, the relatives of the girl and the guy, as well as the young people, agree on when the engagement and wedding will take place.

According to traditions, if the newlyweds live far from their parents, then each of them sends them photographs of their chosen one, the chosen one, describes the person in a letter, and asks for advice, permission to marry. Parents come to visit, get acquainted and at the common table discuss all the details of the future celebration, where the wedding will take place, who will be the toastmaster, the menu of the wedding table, how many guests to call, who pays for the holiday, and also where the young people will live after marriage.

Previously, all the expenses for the holiday fell on the family of the young, today relatives decide this item among themselves on their own. In some cases, modern young couples take on financial obligations, arrange a holiday without the participation of their parents.

A cheerful and incendiary ritual of courtship will turn out if the newlyweds have known each other for a long time, like their parents, many guests gather in the girl’s house, including relatives, friends, girlfriends. Matchmakers joke, read funny ditties, thus creating a grandiose holiday.

The ceremony of matchmaking in ancient Russia

In Russia, matchmaking originated a very long time ago, it really is a whole rite, which was based on property agreements. Before the matchmaking was carried out, the young man comes to the bride, chooses a girl, and after that, informs his parents about his choice.

Then, the groom's relatives collected complete information about his chosen one, and if the information was positive, they convened a family council, where they invited both matchmakers from the guy's side and the matchmaker, the girl's mother.

According to Russian traditions, godparents of a young man or his closest relatives, for example, an uncle or older brother, acted as matchmakers. The matchmaker was the mother of the groom or a woman who at that time was respected in the village, and also had great experience in this matter. A little later, a woman became a matchmaker who recommended unmarried girls to parents who turned to her. The most interesting thing is that in the time of the ancestors, not only young people, but also girls, got married, only the custom remained among the people, the rite of matchmaking on the part of the groom.

Traditions and superstitions

In order for the matchmaking ceremony to be successful, people observed many traditions and signs, thanks to which wedding superstitions appeared. For example, on Wednesday and Friday it was impossible to marry, these are unfavorable days.

The number 13 was considered an inappropriate date, so they made sure that the holiday did not fall on this day. Odd numbers, such as 5 or 7 for matchmaking, have good luck and happiness. In addition, guests came to the bride's house only after the sun had set, according to folk legends, so people avoided damage and the evil eye. After the matchmakers left, a woman from the family tied the poker and the tong, thus trying to attract good luck.

There are legends among the people that before entering the house, the matchmakers should not meet or talk with anyone, approaching the door, first touch the jamb with their hand and shoulder, and only then knock on the door. Guests enter the house, baptized on icons, only after that they begin to speak, all the people who came with the matchmakers, according to tradition, tried to touch the leg of the table at which negotiations were taking place.

As for the girl, the bride is silent all the time during the ceremony, but at the same time, she changes her outfits three times, as the signs say.

In addition, during the matchmaking, the girl had to show her skills and talents, if, for example, she was a needlewoman, then she took out a wedding towel to the guests, which she had prepared especially for this celebration.

After the ceremony was performed, the groom and his relatives went out onto the porch of the house to confer, even if they know the girl well. At this time, the mother of the bride took out a glass of water to the young man, and if he drank it completely, it means that he liked the chosen one and there will be a wedding, if he only sipped, it means that the girl is not to his taste, respectively, and the celebration is canceled.

In Ukraine, the bride chose the bridegroom, if, for example, the girl did not like the young man, she handed him a pumpkin, when the matchmakers left, they closed the doors with their backs, people believe that this brings trouble and loneliness to the young. But, if the bride liked the groom, then the parents called the newlyweds the girl and the guy, and discussed the date of the wedding at the joint council.

Modern rituals, traditions

Today, the ceremony of matchmaking is very different from ancient times, but many, for the sake of interest, want to spend this holiday, taking into account all the rules. Modern rituals do not require special preparation, at a time when earlier, for this holiday, they laid a towel embroidered in accordance with the holiday, prepared special dishes, strictly observed the time, even took into account the character and behavior of relatives. During the ceremony, a young girl, for whom they came to ask, sat by the stove, with her back to the guests, while she raked out the ashes. Today, of course, there is no such thing, so the girl just sits quietly in her room. It remains that the groom comes to the house of the future wife with two bouquets, the flowers for the girl are simple and delicate, but her mother should be given those that will express honor and respect. In total, the two bouquets should not be too different from each other so that the ladies do not get offended.

Modern ceremonies of matchmaking do not require more material costs, because the wedding will cost a pretty penny, but earlier, the engagement of parents cost exactly as much as the wedding celebration.

As a rule, the first word is given to the matchmakers of a young man, but if he goes to visit his parents himself, then he must prepare in such a way that the bride's parents are convinced of his worthiness.

According to traditions and rituals, matchmaking is a request for a girl's hand, and conspiracy is the permission and consent of the parents for the wedding. Therefore, in order to fulfill all the rules, the groom does not convince the father and mother, he shows himself, praises himself to his beloved, so that they understand who their daughter got.

The modern ceremony of matchmaking is greatly simplified, because in the old days a young man could be put out the door and dishonored by the whole village. Today the groom goes to visit the bride's parents, confident that he will be accepted, so you can have fun, now there are many jokes for this tradition.

The whole scenario begins with the fact that the groom comes to the young woman’s house, gives flowers to her mother and continues to praise himself, no one will ever be able to say how the matchmaking should go right, it all depends on the nature of the people, on the situation and the relationships that have developed in family. Therefore, before, all these holidays were trusted by real professional matchmakers, they could correctly create an environment for conversation, they knew when to joke or laugh, and when to completely ignore the situation.

Therefore, when the groom arrives at the house of his betrothed with the matchmakers, it is they who start the conversation, the entire dialogue with the parents takes place at their own discretion, they can bargain a little, underestimate the dignity of the groom, and the more jokes there are, the more fun the matchmaking ceremony will be. It is better, of course, to think everything over in advance and carefully.

As a rule, after the wedding, the matchmakers of the representative side should praise the treats and say that the bride or groom liked it. After the matchmaking, you need to check how the groom lives and whether everything is so good according to the stories of the matchmakers. Unfortunately, modern matchmaking customs do not provide for this, but it is also a very fun moment.

To remember this event, which happens once in a lifetime, do not forget to film or photograph. No one thinks about it right away, but then it will be fun and fervently to watch with the whole family. The highlight of the holiday can be pastries baked with your own hands, it will create a warm and family atmosphere. We should not forget about toasts for matchmaking, you can prepare funny, serious and touching poems.

The video will tell you more about the traditions and customs of matchmaking