Mentor where to get it. Choosing the type of mentor. Man or woman? Who can be a teacher for women

For Look At Me, education has always been one of the most important. We try to talk about important industry trends and new opportunities that arise for those wishing to learn new skills. We have already written about for fundamental education, but what if there is a desire to communicate with the instructor in person? We've put together the best resources to connect you with industry professionals around the world.

It is an educational platform and a complete community for language learners. On Verbling you can order individual sessions with an interested teacher. They cost between $ 15 and $ 50 an hour, but some teachers discount if they buy multiple lessons at once. Also, here you can join group lessons or participate in a practice discussion with other students. Subscription for participation in 10 lessons per month costs 777 rubles, for an unlimited number of lessons - 1,840 rubles. However, you can buy them individually - 614 rubles for five lessons.

Among the resources that do not have a clear specialization, one of the most popular is Jukebox Lessons. Here you can find a variety of instructors to help you learn 170 different disciplines and skills, such as chess, blacksmithing or longboarding, not to mention the more "traditional" ones like yoga, math and music.

This is not a service, but a complete online school for motion designers with a 36-week training course. The fundamental difference: each student has his own tutor who works with him and criticizes his work. After graduation, the tutor will look with his graduate permanent job in partner studios. Mo-Graph Mentor classes are held on the Internet with an interactive component. Third semester students gain access to an online campus where they can connect with other alumni of the school. Semesters start in January, May and September. Each costs $ 1,999.

Why do you need a mentor, I think everyone understands. Let's talk now how to find a mentor?

Let's say that you have to look for a mentor on your own, pay attention to those people whom you admire, whom you respect.

It can be someone from your company or a person who does not belong to it - or it can be both: there can be several mentors (like mine, for example). For some, instructors who meet regularly with the student at short intervals are very suitable.

Think about what you expect from the mentor - what skills you yourself would like to develop with his help. Determine why do you choose a mentor... What qualities would you like to see in him?

You may need to do some kind of "detective investigation" in order to compose the alleged portrait of the mentor. What is his communication style? If you already have plans for a specific person, try to find out what his colleagues and subordinates think of him.

In principle, it makes sense to choose a mentor who works in the same field as yourself and also has a similar value system. “Test” your chosen candidate by asking him for advice.

Be very honest. Mentors tend to be more disposed towards those who remind them of themselves. This is why you should never go to a mentor when you are depressed or completely helpless.

Don't mentor your line manager; it is better to enlist the support of a person with whom you feel more at ease, and can openly discuss career and work issues.

Some people prefer their mentor to be much older, more experienced and take much more high position... They believe that this will make it easier for them to step on the same rung of the career ladder. Others, on the other hand, like to choose their peers. Anyway, sometimes best solutions your problems can be suggested by people who, at present, themselves overcome similar difficulties.

Several valuable advice on finding a mentor:

There are many "natural" and "artificial" ways finding a mentor... But there is no best way. Sometimes the teacher-student relationship develops on its own, and sometimes it takes an effort. Let's look at a few of the most effective waysfinding a mentor.

Ask a colleague for specific problems. The easiest way to find a mentor is at work or in your educational institution- that is, where you spin the most. When looking closely at a potential mentor, think about your plans ahead of time. Do you want to meet monthly and discuss your work problems (for example, how you can earn more)?

Do you want to know how your mentor reached his current position, or are you more interested in talking about the future? The more clearly you have defined what to expect from mentoring, the more productive your conversations promise to be. And remember that mentors are not coaches (we'll talk about the difference between them a little later).

Take a closer look at your family. Perhaps you will find a great mentor in the person of your uncle, sister, mother, or even godfather - just while you have not thought about it. A mentor helps you make personal and business plans, gently leads you to acceptance correct decisions and helps predict the future.

If you have someone in your family who has good health and strong will then perhaps the mentor is closer than you think. After all, it is not at all necessary to invite for this role. general director firms or doctors of science.

Don't neglect opposite sex mentors. Don't get hung up on finding a mentor of the same gender as you. Research shows that this is where mentoring is less effective.

Consider the possibility of communicating remotely. Check out by e-mail every few weeks is sometimes just as effective as meeting in person. Your mentor may generally live overseas or in another city (region), which will not prevent him from helping you in setting realistic achievable goals. Long distances are not a hindrance to discipleship.

Talk to new people you know. If you met with interesting person at a conference or at a business lunch, ask him business card... If you don't have the heart to start talking about mentoring right away, try outlining the request a little later in email... Many people are even flattered by such requests: they understand how honorable it is to help others to improve their affairs. In addition, many mentors are well aware that the appearance of a student is beneficial to them in their career and professional terms.

Consider remote mentoring. You don't have to be know personally with someone you take an example from. For example, Oprah Winfrey is a “virtual” mentor for millions of women - of course, she cannot meet with all of them and discuss her professional tasks with each one. Similarly, there are hundreds of famous and ordinary people that can perfectly motivate you to Success. By studying their biographies and reading their books, you can already learn from them that will allow you to get closer to your goals.

Make your intentions public. Tell your colleagues, friends, family that you seek to acquire a mentor or a coach. Be clear about your goals - whether it's to increase your earnings or acquire an advanced degree. The more people become aware of your intentions, the more chances you have to succeed. (This rule works in all areas of life!)

Mentoring motivates people to achieve and rise.

Studies show that women who have mentors are more successful in their careers, earn more, and love their jobs. Women who are supported by mentors in business have more a high self-evaluation and self-confidence.

So, the benefits of mentoring are clear and you don't risk anything. Once you find a good mentor, then you have nothing to lose - you only benefit from communicating with him. A mentor becomes not only a wise counselor for you, but also a friend, a confidant.

This does not happen immediately - trust and personal interest do not arise out of nowhere. In the beginning, you set the tone by demonstrating a keen interest in communication. Through the mutual respect that manifests itself in your behavior and in caring for each other, communicating with a mentor will benefit both of you - and will be a pleasure for both the mentor and you.

Torsunov Oleg Gennadievich - doctor and psychologist, professor at the Bombay Institute "Vedic Health". Specialist in the field of "Ayurveda", dermatovenerology, acupuncture, acupuncture, reflexology, herbal medicine, traditional medicine... Has author's methods of treatment and diagnosis of diseases, possessing high efficiency and passed tests in the system of the Ministry of Health. Has two Russian patents for an invention. Graduated from the Samara Medical Institute, internship in dermatovenerology, Moscow Peoples' Friendship University, specializing in acupuncture.

Doctor Torsunov received his second education in classical oriental medicine Ayurveda in India. Has patients all over the world.

Vice President of the Association of Ayurvedic Doctors of Russia.

Defended a scientific dissertation on the topic public health... Gives lectures. The results of statistical studies of people who constantly listen to his lectures are as follows:

50% - people abandon their own bad habits... The other 50% who do not quit improve their attitudes towards the addiction.

65% - people improve their relationships in the family.

67% - people improve their attitude to nutrition and daily routine.

47% - people improve their relationships at work. And many, many others.

The fundamental difference from the standard approach to psychological health a person, this is a combination of general psychology, with the ancient Vedic science of life and relationships in the family.

(From a lecture by Oleg Gennadievich Torsunov).
- Be careful when people start predicting something for you. It is very dangerous. But if a person really knows, why not tell? You must always be careful. That is, moving too quickly towards mentoring can lead to serious defeat in life. Often people choose as mentors those who are never even worthy to enter any gate. And there are certain clues to these things. Here is the first, look, a real teacher, this is a servant. He will never pull money out of you. Never. This is simply impossible. And even though delicately, though not delicate. Senior - will never pull money, first rule.
Second: the elder - will never destroy the family for the sake of faith ... Here he is "for the sake of faith" to destroy the family - never will. The elder will never separate you from your children. Older ( mentor ) will never change your faith for another. Older ( mentor ) will never make you "fanatic" and reject your relatives for the sake of knowledge. A senior mentor will never "overextend" you, make you "break". He will always "slow down" you on the contrary, so that you - more accurately walk forward. An elder is one who himself has senior mentors. If he does not have a classical ancient spiritual tradition, "lightning struck in the head", and he - became an elder ( mentor), never listen to this person. It is very dangerous. You see, he must deeply study the scriptures, be in some ancient serious spiritual tradition. He himself must have senior mentors. That's why, without the faith of the elders - there is no... A person must always belong to some kind of chain, to some kind of continuity. Otherwise, he will definitely get lost. A senior mentor, when talking to a woman, never "makes eyes." If you see that an elder sympathizes with you, he is not a senior mentor. Don't deal with him anymore as a senior mentor, this is a mistake.
There are two deviations in senior mentors. Some elders refer only to the scriptures, and have no life experience. They are "dry", and, as it were, they always exaggerate. Others always say life experience and never refer to scriptures. Need - the middle. Moreover, the more a person develops, the more it is necessary to communicate with him from the position scriptures... The less developed, the less, more life experience.
Senior mentor - never pulls a person "by the ears" to spiritual life. He just inspires him to develop. A senior teacher is always a servant, not a master. He does not force himself to serve. He serves himself. Remember? If that something is not there, this person is not qualified to be a senior mentor. And being an elder is very dangerous. Because if you take shelter of a person who is not qualified, he will take you to a place where "Makar does not feed calves." There are terrible pictures. One woman came up to me and said that even before that I had consulted her that her husband had fallen into some kind of “spiritual” tradition, in which the elders (mentors) told him that your wife was undeveloped. Therefore - do not live with her. And in general, how would you move here, and live here, earn on us. Donate more. Why do you need to live a material life? Live - spiritual. Donate more to us here. It is very dangerous!
There are also such systems that if you pay a lot of money, you will receive initiation. And if you pay even more, you will receive an even higher initiation. It all depends on the amount of money. Therefore, in life you need to "plow" a lot for "dedication". This is not a religion, it is a deviation. I'm just telling you - where you shouldn't go.
Or let's say, someone proclaims such principles: “ The main thing is freedom! Love is above all. So whoever you want to have sex with. It's all “love”. Live Free. Take off your clothes, go without your pants. Love everyone around. All other people are squeezed, notorious. You are a child of nature. Run without pants for squirrels. Live in the forest without pants, swim in clean water, have sex - with whoever you want. We are children of nature "... V next life- such people are born as a monkey. That they chose this concept, and - they get it later. That is, it turns out not according to Darwin, but vice versa ( laughs).

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When hard trials fall, anxiety and anxiety grips, people ask for help from God or the wise men to get advice, recommendations for solving their problems. And then there is a need to find a person who can send to the right way and will help you to understand yourself and your own troubles. It is such a person that often becomes a spiritual mentor who helps to open up the soul, repent and make a decision to change your life.

Why is spiritual guidance needed?

Without a leader, one cannot live a life of holiness. You can find a teacher in the church, where you need to come and pray to the Lord to send a confessor who will comfort, advise and direct thoughts in a godly direction. The role of a spiritual mentor is great. He, communicating with his child, conveys what the spirit of God conveys to him, instills peace and harmony in the soul.

As a rule, a spiritual mentor is a person with great life and religious experience, and he is obedient to lead the religious life of others. The confessor plays huge role in the life of a layman and a clergyman, and he is necessary in order to listen to his advice, live piously and achieve the Kingdom of Heaven. Church history has several options for mentoring. But the main ones are:

• the service of the priest in the parish, where he is the spiritual healer of all parishioners;
• eldership, it was it that became widespread in Russia.

Elders - soul healers

Arising in Byzantium, it firmly entered Russian culture and took one of the significant places... The elders bore a vow of obedience and by their word and deeds were called to expose sins and console people entangled in their own doubts. With salutary conversations and instructions, they healed souls, brought them peace and tranquility.

The Russian eldership takes its origins from the Monk Paisiy Velichkovsky and reaches its development thanks to the monks of the Optina Hermitage. Monasteries with their spiritual mentors have long been the center of pilgrimage for the Orthodox people. Elderhood had its own peculiarity, where strict asceticism alternated with active exits into the world. These exits were expressed in contact with the people and in the service of the world as a spiritual assistant, mentor and advisor.

Achieving simplicity with humility

Engaging in the religious education of their disciples, the elders taught wisdom, promoted moral growth and improvement. During the earthly life of their spiritual disciple, they coordinated and directed the deeds and actions of the child. The bond between teacher and student was very strong, because it was built on trusting and respectful relationship, humility and love. Father Zacharius instructed to preserve one's conscience and strive for simplicity, which can only be achieved by humility.

They came to the elders for advice when there were doubts and arose difficult situations... They expected consolation and help from the confessor. The uniqueness of the elders in Orthodoxy lay in the unshakable faith and spiritual strength of the elders and in the delicate work that they carried out in the soul of their disciple. Influencing the human psyche, they delicately and accurately guide a person on the path of gaining love for the Lord.

Finding a mentor

It is a great grace for a believer to find a priest who will be responsible to the Almighty for his disciple, who will make prayers for him, control the growth of spirituality, guide his actions and instruct in worldly life, and also direct him to the path of virtue that leads to eternal life. ...

For a believer, the way of solving problems is different from the way that unbeliever laymen choose. People who are far from religion, as a rule, try to solve their troubles that have arisen, relying on the help and advice of their acquaintances and mainly people who are far from religion. And often the problem is not resolved, but only gets worse. This is due to the fact that all the difficulties are concentrated within us, far from God. And as a result, under the accumulation of sins, spiritual harmony breaks down.

A church-going person with the appearance of unforeseen situations should go to his spiritual father for advice. At the same time, the believer understands that by asking what to do, he is waiting for an answer to his question from the Lord. Seeing his humility, God through the priest gives correct advice and blesses. A Christian will never have doubts that it is necessary to follow what the confessor has said. He is sure that it is the Almighty who is sending him his support. Only if you transfer your heart and soul into obedience to the confessor, God's grace will dwell in a person.

The Church does not put restrictions and provides an opportunity for a good Christian to choose a spiritual father himself. How do I find a spiritual mentor? It will be good if it will be a priest from the church, where you often come to pray. But everything is individual, and sometimes it is not easy to meet a confessor with whom a trusting and cordial relationship would be established.

The mentor's task

Spiritual guidance seeks to improve the personality and the manifestation of the image of God in it, to upbringing spirituality in a person. Orthodox Christian you should definitely read and feel the instructions of the holy fathers. They read:

• the spiritual thoughts of any Orthodox should be guided by a priest, to whose help it is necessary to turn both in confession and in teaching;
• try to communicate with your confessor throughout your life, revealing your sins and godless thoughts;
• following the teachings of your spiritual father, you will certainly gain the Kingdom of Heaven;
• if you entrust your heart to your confessor, then God's grace will settle in your soul.

How to Choose a Spiritual Father?

How to Choose a Spiritual Guide? You shouldn't look for any ways. No need to apply special efforts starting a search for a spiritual guide. This will tell the heart. The understanding of whether this is your person or not will come by itself if:

• Father's advice has a beneficial effect and heals the soul;
• you get comfort and support;
• feel joy and serenity while communicating with him;
• feel and believe in the power of his prayer and mutual benevolence.

How to Start Searching for a Spiritual Father

For God to suggest how to find a spiritual guide, you need to pray a lot and passionately. When starting the search, you need to take a closer look at the parish in which the priest conducts services. A good priest always has a welcoming atmosphere in the church. It is worth talking to parishioners and finding out their opinion about the pastor.

You should not go to distant lands, wondering where to find your spiritual mentor. He may be close and closer than you think. You don't need to tell anyone about your mentor when you meet him. Religious life is private, and there is no need to put it on public display.

Come often to the church you like. Open yourself to the priest in confession and pray for him, and then God through him will reveal His will. When communication with a clergyman is confidential, then it is worth following the advice of the priest and, having received the parting words, carry it out. There is no need to come with one question or problem to many priests, hoping for a change of understanding.

There is no need to rush and call the first father you come across as your spiritual father. When attending church, confess and ask the priest for advice about your problem. And then it is possible to meet a confessor close to oneself.

When communicating with parishioners, find out where to find your confessor, and which priest enjoys the authority and respect of the flock.

You need to start reading with simple and understandable texts. Spiritual books will help you to correctly determine the goals and priorities in life.

Does a person need a spiritual mentor

In any field of activity or in sports, a novice specialist, athlete or student always has a mentor. He helps to master the profession, shares experience, advice. The mentoring of a clergyman is aimed at achieving the student's strength of spirit, religious self-awareness and the fulfillment of divine commandments.

The relationship between a child and a confessor is not measured by the amount of time spent together. Sometimes a few sentences are enough to calm the soul and the questions are resolved. It is important to follow all the advice given by the confessor.

In worldly life, it is important for families following the laws of God to confess to one confessor. It happens that the arising internal family problems can be solved together.

For a church-going person, it is advisable to keep a record of their sins and then confess them to their spiritual father as often as possible. It is believed that salvation is in a multitude of tips. Therefore, it is useful for the soul to seek answers to questions from several priests. But it is better to reveal thoughts and sinful thoughts only to your spiritual father.

Some believers do not know that, when going to the pastor, they need to read the prayer: “Lord! Give me mercy and inspire the spiritual father to give me an answer according to your will. " Trusting yourself to your spiritual father is the best way to embark on the path of correction. The devil will not be able to intervene where everything secret and sinful was revealed to the spiritual father. It is important to obey your leader, for through him you obey God.

Spiritual teacher

A confessor is like a teacher who reveals the true meaning of many things and the truth to his wards. The teacher, the spiritual mentor must expand the inner potential of the individual, influence him, make the spiritual world of the pupil in tune with his own.

Mentoring is also the prayers of the confessor for sending him wisdom in teaching his disciples. This is his appeal to God in unsolvable situations, a request for support from the Heavenly Intercessor in moments of doubt and helplessness. The spiritual father is responsible before Jesus Christ for the children entrusted to him.

Spiritual guides of man

On our way, we come across many people who call and consider themselves spiritual mentors. Often they have their own teachings, schools, or they call themselves followers of famous spiritual personalities. These mentors have students, like-minded people, and admirers who support their views and beliefs.

In addition, each person has his own invisible spiritual helpers. These include angels who protect and preserve throughout life. If you can learn to understand them, then life will become much easier and easier. Coming into the world with a born baby, angels leave it after death.

A believer who seeks to follow God's commandments with a clear conscience and thoughts, before adversity. They only strengthen beliefs and perfect his soul. Going to his confessor, he realizes that he is asking for advice not from a person, but from the Lord, who through a priest gives necessary advice and blesses. The parting words of the spiritual father, strictly followed, will lead to help from God. For the purpose of man's existence on earth is to cleanse his heart and feel the closeness of God.

When you're trying to build your dream freelance career, without a mentor to teach you the ins and outs of the profession and the lifestyle itself, it can be tough.

Even if you are confident in yours creativity and don't have trouble finding clients, talking to another experienced freelancer can help you grow your career as quickly and efficiently as possible. A more experienced colleague can tell you how to solve problems with clients or find new ones, teach you some tricks, and may even throw you a little job.

However, finding a mentor is difficult. Unlike people working in large companies with access to many potential mentors on a daily basis, you work alone. There is no one to teach you. Everything is only in your hands.

We've put together some tips to help you find the perfect mentor (online and offline) to help you advance your career!

Finding a mentor in your city

Most traditional way finding a mentor is to use local connections... Even if you don't work for a company with a large team, there are many great ways connect with potential mentors in your city.

Look for courses. If you live in a large city, you can find special training programs, courses, and even mentoring programs - when interns are recruited to the team, with the prospect of employment.

Use dating. Stay connected with everyone you studied with or taught you at some time. You never know where to find an amazing mentor. LinkedIn is an extremely valuable (and forgotten) resource for this type of network. Look for people you already know working in your area locally.

Attend events... Various conferences and other events are one of better ways meet other freelancers in your city. Even if you live in a small town, there is a good chance that someone close to you is working in your field.

Finding an online mentor

Since you work online, why not find a mentor right there? Especially since modern technologies making it as easy as shelling pears. In many ways, digital mentoring is simpler and more effective than traditional mentoring: you don't have to worry about making time to meet in person, you can easily keep track of shared resources and notes, as well as yours. big choice among coaches, this is better than limiting yourself to people living a few miles away.

E-learning plans. Even if you are already an expert in your field, platforms like Skillshare can be in an amazing way find potential mentors. Check out their courses to see what teachers in your field seem to be suitable, and contact directly saying that you enjoy chatting.

Search Twitter. Most people think of LinkedIn as the holy grail for finding professional contacts, but Twitter isn't bad either. The main reason is that the freelance community is incredibly active on Twitter, and you're more likely to find someone here than on LinkedIn. Use the search and filter the people you want. Start reading a few people whose work you like and start getting to know each other. Comment, retweet, make it feel as natural as possible! After a while, write a private message, invite on Skype.

Internet communities. The opportunities to connect with other freelancers online are endless. Sign up to Behance, find interest groups on social media, go to Dribble.

Follow other designers you like in the comments on their work. Similar to how you handle new contacts on Twitter, slowly start building online relationships with certain people which you like before contacting directly. Check out other communities like The Designers League, which are often home to many amazing freelancers around the world.

How to get the maximum benefit from communicating with a mentor

So you've found a mentor and are ready to start building a relationship. Remember that he is giving you time, time that he could use to focus on his own career.

Write down a list of questions that you want to discuss before each meeting so that your mentor can review them in advance.

Always discuss the next steps. Take the last few minutes of each conversation to discuss actions and next steps.

Create a shared online space. Use a platform like Evernote or Trello to create a shared folder where you and your mentor can share notes, inspiration, and projects.

Be grateful. Mentoring takes time and a lot of mental effort on the part of your mentor. Always be on time, don't ask for too many appointments, and be incredibly grateful! Always offer to buy coffee if you meet in real life or offer collaboration if you have an online mentor.

And don't be afraid to admit to yourself that you need help. It is better to find a coach than to stuff your own bumps and do outright stupid things.