I don’t need myself! What should I do? The path of awareness is a slow path, but it goes on increasing all the time. Name what you choose from them

It has been two weeks since the club football season ended in Azerbaijan. And the site decided to take stock of the performances of eight teams in the Topaz Premier League. Let's start from the bottom. The only “relegator” of the finished season - “Kapaz” from Ganja - was remembered for various moments.

The club of the country's second city in the “elite” did not stay there for long: three years after returning to the Premier League, Ganja will again have to while away time in the company of “Garadagh-Lokbatan”, “Agsu” and other permanent representatives of the first division. If, of course, the management has a desire to support the team.

From the very beginning of the season, it became clear that something had gone wrong. The Ganja team scored only one point in six matches, sharing the last two lines with Neftchi. Further, the paths of the two oldest rivals split - some went up and at the end of the season reached the medals, while others stayed where they arrived. And this is despite the fact that in the 7th round they won an away victory over Gabala (!) With a score of 2: 0. Quite a strange victory, but no one caught anyone's hand. After another three rounds, also away, Keshla was defeated, with the same result. And the last victory "yellow-blue" got on March 3, beating at home "Sabail". And it was the only home “victoria” of Ganja for the entire season, except for the cup defeat by “Binet” (3: 0). The only one ...

During the season, the team changed its coach - Yunis Huseynov came instead of Shahin Diniyev. Diniev's departure was accompanied by various kinds of talk in the press. Mikayil Narimanoglu left the team with him - now the former AFFA press secretary held a post in the Supervisory Board of Kapaz. However, the game of Ganja did not receive any improvements - having gained 14 points, they left the Premier League. And now they have to think about what to do next.

A number of players are likely to pursue careers in other clubs. Some have already found a new home. For example, Shakhriyar Rahimov, who has been playing well for several seasons in a row, signed a contract with Sabail, and Neftchi was acquired by Dario Frederico. Shakhriyar Aliyev will find a new home very soon.

On the one hand, the absence of football in Ganja is a loss. But the current "Kapaz" was created almost artificially. Yes, they went to him and supported him, it was the most visited team in the championship. But can it compare with its predecessors? Indeed, for all these three seasons, the club from Ganja did not bother to properly deal with its infrastructure, limiting itself to updating only one part of the seats in the stands. In fact, “Kapaz” was based in Baku, coming to the city he represented exclusively for “home” matches. Only at the end of the recently completed season did any movement begin in this direction. But who knows if they will continue now.

No one expected that this team would repeat the feats of the past, but getting into the European cups promised certain hopes. And they didn't come true. Ganja was not fully involved in big football anyway, although the stadium still attracted full stands. But the saddest thing is that the city, and judging by the whole club itself, by and large, as we saw, is not needed.

Kapaz statistics for the 2017/18 TPL season
Scored and conceded (average): 18-47 (0,64 – 1,68)
Top scorer: Dario Frederico (4)
Most played (matches): Shakhriyar Rahimov (27)
Most played (minutes): Shakhriyar Rahimov (2430)
Got the most cards: Shahriyar Aliyev (9)

“We need to learn to be ourselves best friends, it is so easy to fall into the trap - to become your own worst enemy. We like the idea that others love us, but we ourselves forget to love ourselves. " We share 16 inspiring tips from a popular blogger Mark Chernoffthat will set you up to accept yourself.

“Today some of those whom I love have ceased to respect me. But I don't want to commit suicide anymore. I finally managed to follow your advice, and now everyone has learned the truth about who I really am and what I intend to do with my life. In short, my decision is to love and respect myself instead of proving to others that I need to be loved and respected. "

These are lines from a morning chat with a person who has been reading me for a long time. This man asked not to be identified, but allowed me to quote his own words, which I am very happy about.

After all, the most difficult thing in the world is to learn to accept yourself, understand and love with all your imperfections. Honestly admit who we are, how we feel, and what we need. Do not beat yourself up for not being different and respect yourself for who we are. Understand that not everyone we love will be with us along the way, and take it calmly.

So it's time ...

Start telling yourself what you like about yourself
It’s important to know how wonderful you are. You need to look in the mirror and treat yourself kindly. After all, what you see in the mirror is often what you see in the world. Disappointment with others reflects disappointment with yourself. Acceptance of others reflects acceptance of oneself. The ability to see potential in people reflects the ability to see it in yourself. A patient attitude towards others reflects a patient attitude towards oneself. The principle is clear: first of all, you need to show love for yourself.

Get used to yourself today and be yourself
It is sometimes very difficult, but worth it. Not chasing perfection, but trying to become truly yourself. The most beautiful thing about this is simply to return to a blissful state of being. When the mind retrains to perceive life as it is, and not as it "should" be, an inner peace comes.

Worry less about other people's approval
Remind yourself that you don't have to do what others do. You also don't have to ask permission to do things your own way. Every minute of your life on this planet is precious. There is even a saying: "What I do today is important, because I am trading a whole day of my life for it." Don't expect others to let you live.

Distance yourself from those with whom you feel bad
Better to be alone than with the wrong people. Don't think about those who don't think about you. Respect yourself! When you open up to someone who doesn't respect you, you lose yourself. True friends motivate us, inspire and respect us. Your social circle should be composed of those who support you. Do not let anyone into it. Quality is always more important than quantity.

Forgive yourself of the past
When you bring your own dark sides and forgive yourself for them, you fight your demons, causing the angels to rejoice. It's all about accepting: sometimes good peoplelike you do not the best way... It doesn't mean that you bad person, - it just means that you are human. The past is over, leave it alone. Forgive yourself for what you did or didn’t do, and think about what you’ll do next.

Start to change what is time to change
Just because something has brought you joy in the past does not mean that you have to remain faithful to it forever. If you want a change in your life, do what you have not done before. New actions \u003d new result... It's time to give up what no longer fulfills you, and let thoughts and activities into your life that will give you energy and help you realize.

Accept your future mistakes
For successful person mistakes are inevitable. Do not give in to fear: it is better to make a wrong decision than not make any.

Give thanks for who you are and what you have
No, you won't always get everything you want. And no, you won't always be what you want. But remember this: a lot of people will never have what you have. So let the pain, grief and discomfort from the lack of what you want not anger you, but motivate you to take action. You decide how you look at life.

Do something every day that brings joy
There is a huge difference between empty weariness and joyful exhaustion. Life is too short. Invest in what you really like. Good life - this is when you do something you love every day and thus take care of yourself. It is important to realize that taking care of yourself is not selfishness. We cannot give to others what we do not have. We must learn to give love and care to ourselves, then there will be something to give to others.

Allow yourself to experiment
Don't be afraid to start, even if you don't know how it will end. When we act, stepping into the unknown, new opportunities come.

Listen to intuition and do not deceive yourself in anything
It is impossible to talk about a life that you do not live. Sweet fairy tales are not needed, truth is needed. Listen inner voice... Confidence comes from the understanding that you are acting correctly, and it is right for yourself.

Believe in your capabilities
Everything's possible! The main thing is to decide what you want, to understand that this desire is part of you, and to believe that you are worthy to get what you want.

Be attentive to the present
A great gift to yourself (and loved ones) is to be here and now, as much as possible. Life is not the time between birth and death, it happens every moment, inhale and exhale. Every now and then something distracts us, we must often remember what is happening here and now. Otherwise, we lose a lot.

Relax and take life less seriously
The roots of suffering are in self-pity, and the roots of self-pity are too much serious attitude to life. If you take everything seriously, especially yourself, eventually you will become afraid to do anything at all. Relax, laugh at the situation if possible, especially when things don't go as planned. People with good feeling humor understand life better. When you first really laughed at yourself and your situation, you grew up.

Try to show love and kindness to others
Usually, the way we treat ourselves is how we treat others. Those who love themselves are usually caring, generous and good-natured with others; they are confident in themselves, so they are humble, sociable and forgiving others. Therefore, try to understand others first, and only then judge. Thank fate for rude, difficult people to communicate - they teach us what not to be.

Let's summarize:

People will come and go. Will happen different events, fly by days and nights. But true love to itself will always stay with you if you feed it.

So take into account what is written above, and today:

Do something that will make you love yourself more.

Think about what to do to love yourself more.

Connect with people who can help you love yourself more.

And repeat tomorrow.

Translated by Marina Nestrugina, IntuEat © Center for Intuitive Nutrition

I'm 25. I don’t want to live anymore, this thought comes to me not for the first time, from about 20 years old the thought periodically arose to leave for another world. Now the limit ... My mother committed suicide when I was 16. My father soon began to live with another young man. My relationship with her immediately went wrong. Having lived like this for several years, having received a diploma in a specialty I did not need, I left for a larger city, immediately started working in another field, big money I didn’t earn money, I only had enough to rent housing and modest food, I rarely bought things for myself, I still wear things and shoes I bought in my student years, but at first my father helped me a little more, it was easier. Two years later my independent life I met a guy, loved him very much, at first he was affectionate we often saw each other, but it soon became clear that he loves to drink, our meetings became less frequent, but I loved him and still love him, now we see him two or three times a month , then when he wants, he borrowed a lot of money from me, but did not give anything although he promised many times, in general, he just uses me, and I endure everything and forgive, because I love. And now there are also problems with work, at the last place of work I was beaten by the director, he also liked to drink and one day he showed up drunk in the store, began to pester and, having received a refusal, beat me. I wanted to write a statement, but his wife tearfully asked to forgive him, offered him money, but I refused, just left, did not write the statement. For a month I just lay at home and walked away. And now for the third month I cannot find another job, so that to pay for housing, I pledged everything of value that I had in a pawnshop. And now I don't have a penny, there is nothing more to pledge, I will soon pay the rent, I spent the last money on travel for the interview, but no one called back, and the loans are overdue, I eat cereals on the water for a week, but these supplies will soon run out. My boyfriend does not care about this, he was never interested in my problems. My father has not called me for a long time, it is understandable that he does not need such a daughter. I don't need me anymore. Before leaving this life, I decided to write here, the last money on the phone, so I decided to write via the mobile Internet. I don’t ask for help, I’ve already decided everything for myself. People appreciate if you have a loving person, a family, your own apartment, a good job. I was not lucky in anything, I am alone and no one needs me, even myself, so it's better to just leave this life and no longer suffer from loneliness and poverty.
Support the site:

Vera, age: 03/16/2015

Feedback:

Girl, why did you fold your paws? Stop! Specifically what to do, I will not tell you, as always, look for any job, ask to live at the local church temporarily. But! How is it that nobody needs you? This is a false belief. This world needs you, you are unique, there is no other! You can still meet good man, you can give birth to children, and this great happiness! You can do all this for yourself. Poverty is how to perceive it! Everything is measured by the person himself, and money is not yet an indicator of happiness. Get out! Spit on loans for now, put your soul in order - it is immortal with you! And live, live, everything changes and your life will change for the better!

Madame, age: 53 / 03/16/2015

Vera, please don't be so discouraged! There will definitely be work. None, so different. Look not only in the store, but also some others. Babysitters may be needed, nurses, cleaning ladies, after all.
You call dad yourself. After all, he does not know what situation you are in. He probably thinks that you are doing well. I'm sure he will help. It's not a shame to ask for help in such a situation. It will give you money to pay for the apartment, and there, perhaps, the issue of work will be resolved.
Pray to St. Nicholas, he always helps people who are in difficult situations with money or work. Try it. You will see that help will definitely come. Through people, or something else.
Don't be discouraged by any means.
Mom, perhaps, did just that, but you don't need to do that. The souls of suicides suffer greatly after death. You can't do this. And you have to pray for mom.
And you shouldn't count on this guy. He seems to be busy only with himself. You will definitely meet another good person.

Olya, age: 42 / 03/16/2015

Hello sweet girl with beautiful name!!! Please do not go, this life is above all trials, all suffering and problems. It is much larger. Do you think the torment will end? Alas, no, they will become only eternal, and these are not fairy tales or fictions, this is a reality awaiting suicide, because this sin is not forgivable. And everything in life, absolutely everything can be changed. The first thing to do is really ask to live at the monastery. You will find out what life with God is, and you will always have time to leave. You are still so young. Do you wanna rob yourself of your happiness mutual love, deprive yourself of the smiles of your kids? Believe me, honey, all this will be, you deserve it. Just get through this crisis. Do not leave evil in this world by leaving. God help you !!!

Divergent, age: 03/16/2015

Hello Vera!
I hope you can read the answers that
People will write to you! Give yourself one more chance -
turn to where you can - at least to your father - maybe
maybe he can somehow help with work. Or
try to contact the nearest Temple - talk to the priest - for sure you will be able to
help. For the future - do not drive yourself into a corner -
seek help everywhere and as soon as you feel
that you yourself cannot cope. Despite all the troubles,
what happened to you - know the world not without
kind people and there will certainly be those who
can help! God's help to you!

Mikhail, age: 45 / 03/16/2015

Vera, you have a father. You are not alone. You think you don't need him. This is not true. I hardly communicate with my father, he has a different family, he rarely calls, but I know that he will curse himself if he finds out that I was in trouble and did not call him.
Ask your father for help. That's why he is a father. Let him send money for life or for a ticket home. Relatives should help each other. That is how it should be! You would help him.
Go to your neighbors and call or ask for a phone on the street. Get out of the situation. And mark the thought of suicide!

Valeria, age: 32 / 03/16/2015

Vera, I read your story and I felt so sorry for you, you just can't imagine, my heart sank. If you were near, I would hug you and invite you to my house, help you with food, water and things. I am your age and also went through a lot in my life, I also broke up with drinking guy, which did not put me in anything. You see, he does not treat you like that out of malice, just alcohol has changed his personality and he is not able to behave differently, has forgotten how to do it, does not know how. It's not that he doesn't love you, he doesn't love anyone at all. Chase him with a filthy broom. And you are very good, just how much you have gone through, only this already makes you good. You have such life experience and the tempering that you must pass it on to other people. As for your boss, the situation is basically the same. He didn’t beat you because you’re bad. He simply degraded, oskotin, he did not understand what he was doing, alcohol ruined his brain. He may have sobered up later and he himself was ashamed, but he could not do anything with himself. Lift up right hand, put it down and say "Fuck you all the forest!" and live on. Call your father while you have money on your phone, he doesn’t know what situation you are in, he can help at least with advice, but no, in fact, contact the temples, they will help somewhere. Perhaps living at the monastery will be the best for you now, even though your soul will rest. Life is pushing you towards some decisive action, look for a way out.

Altavista, age: 03/16/2015

Dear Vera, Vera!
Hold on dear, fight to the end, to the last!
You need to try to borrow money from someone for the first time, look for a job with accommodation, can they provide a hostel? This is only for the first time to get back on your feet. Drive this guy away from you while you are with him you can miss your future husband, who will love and care for you. You will be happy, and it cannot be otherwise!

Alexander, age: 03/16/2015

Vera (that's what an irony of fate), calm down. Tea is not 15 years old - but as much as 25. You, unfortunately, for your age, are too dramatized and too great importance give everything that happens to you. Everything that you describe happens not only to you - great amount people across the country cannot get a job and pay their rent. You feel too sorry for yourself.
"And I endure everything and forgive, because I love" - \u200b\u200bI think that is not why you endure and forgive. But because for you this option is the only "guaranteed" one.
And the problem is not in him, not in the drunken director, not in the employers and not even in your father - everything is much more banal. The problem is that, on the one hand, you do not love yourself at all, and on the other hand, you love yourself too much. You are so afraid of hurting yourself again, filling a bunch of bumps and finally breaking out into people that you decide that the world is not worthy of you. And you make this decision too early. As long as you are alive, everything is in your hands - all the possibilities that only you may have. And the happiness that you either looked for very badly, or looked for in a completely different place. So if you think that the situation is hopeless - think again.

V., age: 28 / 16.03.2015

Dear Vera!
It is very rare that everything is everywhere. More often there is a good job, but personal life no, or vice versa, there is a loving spouse, but with work you just can't, for years you sit on your spouse's neck.
You have no strength, but God can give you these strengths if you ask. This has been tested by millions of people. Go to the Temple, to confession, to communion, this will help you to rethink a lot.
Prayer helps us feel connected with loved ones who have passed away.
Take a look at memoriam.ru

I understand that it seems to you that you can do the same as your mother - but this is a child's position, living your life, do not repeat the mistakes of your parents, on the contrary, you need to get better, and take an example from their best deedsrather than the worst. You know, like no one else, how much suffering your mother's act brought to all who loved her. How much she could do, change, if she stayed alive. And how differently your life would have turned out, perhaps there would not have been so much dislike in it, there would not have been this guy humiliating you, and if you had encountered such a director, you would never have gone to work for him, because you would have been loved and respect themselves. So when you stand on that pivot point, do right choiceyou will learn a lesson from what happened to your mom. And the lesson is to LIVE. Evil can only be defeated by LOVE. God bless you.

Margarita, age: 03/16/2015

Vera! Don't talk about yourself like that! As it is you do not need yourself, love yourself, do not offend the little frightened, offended girl inside you. Fight for yourself. You are only 25 years old, you will still have a family and children. This difficult period will probably end soon, you will find a job, contact the employment center, you can find something for the first time and look for good work... Call dad native person will help. And the guy should be forgotten, in difficult times it becomes clear what kind of people are around us, and such people just need to be deleted from your life. Vera, do not do anything stupid, everything will be fine, you will get out slowly. Hugging you.

Sveta, age: 03/16/2015

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Recent requests for help

18.02.2019 I was abandoned again. I think to commit suicide.

18.02.2019 Recently, I began to think about suicide often ... I had an operation and I do not leave the house, I’m out of the habit of society, I’m afraid not to pass the exam.

18.02.2019 I want to finish myself. There is no one to live for.

Read other requests

The path of awareness is a slow path, but it goes on increasing all the time.

“This is already clear to everyone!” Our world was gaining egoistic momentum, believing that with the help of the ego it could achieve anything.

But in the end we came to the understanding that it is impossible to live like this any longer - we can no longer exist in our egoism.

But while everyone understands this, no one can do anything.

Progress is inexorably working its way through the program of creation. And we are passive observers of it, because Nature leads us to the realization that we can no longer exist in our past paradigm.

Question: We are accustomed to the fact that for the transformation of society we must have some kind of plan ...

Answer: No plan! Only natural development! How did humanity develop initially? - By the same principle!

We cannot plan like Baron Munchausen: tomorrow at nine in the morning is a feat, because this is a natural, true development.

The main thing is to connect a second, altruistic force and let Nature calmly develop an integral community - nothing else is needed.

It will build itself up. Only in this way will we make society correct, only in this way nature acts.

It evokes some kind of impulse in us, and we will realize it further, climbing like a sperm that finds a way and gives birth to a new life.

This is how an additional system - a new community - will start to be organized within the old society.

This system is built in a natural way.

There are no obligations and dictates in it.

We do not indicate anything to anyone, but only teach people how to properly interact with each other - on the principles of bestowal and love. Nothing else.

Selfishness constantly rages in you, and in spite of it, with the help of the surrounding society, examples, approval from your comrades, you try to prove yourself as loving and giving to the environment. "

("Conversations on the New Integral Society".

)

*******

“The world has come to the extreme point of its egoistic development, has crossed this point and is gradually starting to slide down.

Such a movement is inevitable, it does not depend on us, because we are triggered by the internal program of creation, and every day humanity will more and more feel the world crumbling, like a house of cards.

Our selfishness is the cause of all our problems and suffering.

At the same time, the problem lies not in inanimate, plant and animal nature, but only in a person - in his constant movement towards himself, in an effort to improve his personal state at the expense of others and even to the detriment of others.

This is the opening of the cause of our fall, which is inevitable, but it can be controlled and controlled by us if we rise above our nature and look at it from the outside.

It is in order to realize this that reason is given to us. It is not only possible for us, but also required to change our nature with the help of the power that will manifest itself in our unity. "

Return to nature

Everyone around is talking about social development.

Development means more benefits, and a person becomes indifferent to them.

Young people do not want to work, do not want to study, do not want to leave their parents. Adults become infantile, feel like children, they feel good with mom and dad.

And parents agree with this: "Let my son or daughter live with us." And the son or daughter is already 30-35 years old, but it is much easier, cheaper, more convenient and financially more profitable for them to live with their parents.

In addition, this is encouraged by the states themselves, which provide a person with a small allowance so that he can sit quietly at home, because there is still no work, enterprises are closed, and these people become superfluous.

Today robots can provide anything.

Nobody wants billions of workers, billions of farmers. No one is interested in the poetry of haymaking. Everything is grown industrially in greenhouses.

One of my students, the mayor of a southern Italian city, says that there are so many plantations in their area that they could fill the whole of Europe with vegetables and fruits. The same is true in Israel, where greenhouses stretch for many kilometers in the desert.

Their owners offer: "Give us unlimited sales markets, and we will fill them with any agricultural products. We can provide the whole world. If you want, we will feed China."

We are in a state where no one is needed by anyone.

Man does not need himself.

He has a very narrow area of \u200b\u200binterest, the main thing is comfort and a couple of comrades with whom he leaves the house, sits in a cafe and while away the time.

The field of human activity is shrinking. Ambition ceases to be the driving force. A person who has achieved some success quickly curtails his activities.

It seems that a career is open to him, but he does not want to make efforts, he does not want to bear any responsibility. That is, egoism - the force that guides us, our base, our substrate, becomes completely different.

But we can trace it, we can understand where this is all leading. In general, I don't think this is a bad thing.

Question: So you don't consider passivity a dangerous sign?

Answer: Why should mankind develop materially further ?! What can this give you ?!

40 more dresses? But you don't need them, you just won't have time to vilify them.

We have reached the level where we can provide ourselves with everything we want, and at the same time we understand that we do not need it. Let's say I have jeans torn in the latest fashion, I bought them like that, I wear them and that's enough for me.

Nowadays they specially produce shabby, chewed up jackets and not ironed, stale-looking shirts, because everything goes to simplicity, to a deviation from the material. The next stage of development should be a return to nature.

We should be simpler, create around ourselves not an artificial environment, but an environment similar to nature, which is in homeostasis with it, in equilibrium. This is our goal, the striving of those forces that are active in us.

We feel it especially keenly now:

“I don’t want to work, I don’t want to do anything,” that is, these forces speak in me. This means that I need to study them thoroughly, find out what these forces are, who and what is leading me.

From the TV program "Integral World", 24.10.2012

http://www.laitman.ru/crisis/123810.html

One young man came to his spiritual mentor and said:

- Teacher, you advised me to mentally repeat the phrase: "I accept joy in my life." I pronounce it many times every day, but there was no joy in my life, and there is no; I'm as lonely as I was ... What can I do?

The sage silently put in front of the young man the first objects that came to his hand - a spoon, a mug, a candle - and asked:

- Name what you choose from them.

“A spoon,” the youth replied.

- Say it five times ... - asked the elder.

“I'm choosing a spoon,” the young man said five times.

- You see, - said the teacher, - if you repeat at least a million times a day that you choose a spoon, it will not be yours. You have to reach out and take it.

We need to make a move ...

***********

Spirituality and climate on the Planet - what is the connection? Straight!

The sad consequences of the consumer attitude towards nature: the Gulf Stream no longer exists!

"White bed, like uninhabited island in the ocean of a large and deserted room, where it is so lonely "- with these words begins the autobiographical novel" 100 days between life and death " Lilies koh... Life itself pushed her to write a confession book; after moving to Germany, a young woman was diagnosed with an oncological disease. At the age of 30, she was diagnosed with stage 3 breast cancer. From that moment on, Lily's life changed once and for all.

Now, 15 years later, Lilia Koch, who has overcome the disease, is a writer, certified psychologist and NLP - master, the author of the unique psychological game "Phoenix Rebirth", which helps people around the world to cope with serious illnesses and crisis situations... Lilia travels a lot around the world, consults people, conducts a game, shares her experience in in social networks and at meetings. Her soul and heart are open to give people kindness, understanding, love and new light.

On May 24, Lilia Kokh visited Kazan for the first time at the invitation of the RKOD of the Ministry of Health of the Republic of Tatarstan, the rehabilitation clinic "Vesna". The program of the visit was eventful: meeting with the Minister of Health of the Republic of Tajikistan Adel Vafin, communication with journalists and, most importantly, communication with people who are now going through difficult times, fighting cancer. A commemorative meeting took place in Korston with over 100 people attending.

Seeing in front of you a young, beautiful, slender woman, many who came doubted whether the terrible thing that they are experiencing now really happened to her? But Lilia's first words instantly lifted the barriers between her and the audience.

“When I found out about my diagnosis, which my German doctor told me in a rather casual and businesslike manner, my first thought was:“ Somehow all this is unreal, not about me. ” I didn't cry, I didn't cry. But I firmly decided that I needed to undergo treatment quickly and continue living my life. After all, I have so many plans. I wanted to live! So I started writing my diary, writing down the history of my illness, operation, treatment, recovery, my fears, worries, experiences, moments of joy.

I published my notes in a live journal on the Internet. Then I did not think that it would be important to someone. But people began to write to me with a request, questions, what happened next. It is in such situations that it is important to be honest with yourself, extremely honest, without looking back. Only honesty gives freedom from fear, engenders faith in oneself, in one's own healing, removes illusions, hardens and gives strength in this difficult moment. "

- Tell me, Lilya, were you not afraid to talk about your diagnosis to your family and friends? We in Russia do not like to talk about it. Because society starts at best case To feel sorry for you, at worst - to make sad predictions?

“People also reacted differently to the news of my illness. Someone talked to me as usual, someone seemed to say goodbye to me. With the latter, I tried to communicate less. Such people transmit their personal fears to you. I underwent surgery and was treated in Germany, here it is not customary to consider a person sick after the treatment. This attitude makes you mobilize your moral and physical strength, stop feeling sorry for yourself and, finally, take responsibility for your life, actions and thoughts. I know that many people in such difficult moment in life, they still experience the betrayal of loved ones. This also affected me. But you know, it's like cleansing.

- When a person is diagnosed with "oncology" it concerns the whole family. What would you advise the family and friends of a sick person in such a situation?

- First of all, support your loved one, in a word, by deed. But! Do not regret or indulge all his whims and weaknesses. Otherwise, for many years you will make your life unbearable and will not help your loved one get out of the disease.

When remission comes, you must live full life... Be sure to communicate, not hide, start doing something new: paint, dance, compose, knit, sing.

You see, no one needs someone who is not needed by himself.

- How was your Phoenix Rebirth game born? Does she really help people change their reality?

- The game was born thanks to my illness. It was my serious diagnosis that made me reconsider my thoughts and actions. After the operation, the course of chemotherapy, I reassembled myself, I learned to think, speak and live differently. I realized that all the answers to my questions live inside me. Therefore, as a mythical bird Phoenix, I was reborn as a different person.

I have not become stronger physically, but I have become strong in my soul, in my heart, in my mind. My psychological education helped me come up with this game in which the possibilities of our subconscious are revealed. Sometimes it is “combustion” that makes it possible to get out of the inert environment of our settled life, get out of the rut and be reborn again, consciously.

In the game, we explore the most important spheres of life for a person: attitude towards oneself, relationships with loved ones, career and spirituality. And the participant, as in a mirror, sees the full picture of his life: his strengths, true desires and needs, obstacles, strategies that do not work. In addition, the main feature of the game is that it is always played with a specific request in mind. And there will be no winners or losers in it. Everyone will receive an answer to their question.

What questions can you explore in the game? They can concern any area of \u200b\u200bthe participant's life. The most popular ones are to meet love, start a family, get rid of insecurity, find their own business, increase income, find harmony.

Often I hear the following question: "So what, I leave the cube, and my life will change, and dreams will come true?" Yes, that's exactly what it will be! But in order to get closer to the realization of their dreams and remove obstacles on the way to it, the participants will not only have to get to know themselves better, but also carry out an internal audit, accept a personal transformation, and acquire an internal readiness for change. It makes sense to play Phoenix Rebirth for the sake of change.

IN everyday life we would rather change circumstances rather than ourselves. But the greater the distance between the reality around us and what we want, the more more change must happen in us on the way to the goal. Otherwise, the goal will constantly and inexplicably elude us. And the game just gives us this valuable opportunity - to understand in which direction to move, what to change in own realitywhat to give yourself to your beloved at all levels of personality, in order to finally let change into your life.

- Lilia, what can you say about your life now? How do you live now?

- Probably, it will be unusual to hear from an adult, but I live as in childhood. No more hiding your feelings and emotions. This gives me the strength to meet new people, help them, gain new knowledge, travel, be creative, overcome difficulties.

I travel a lot around the world, I advise, I play my game, I answer all the letters that people write to me. I am glad that I can help someone ...

- Tell me, where to start, so that changes begin, so that the disease recedes, to believe in your strength?

- From self-love. FROM great love to yourself, as a person, as a person. Don't expect someone to come and save you and fix your life. Start living in the here and now. Do not store nice clothes and dishes for tomorrow, use it today. Don't put off your hobby until tomorrow. Stop scolding, blaming, and comparing yourself. We are real people and it's okay to make mistakes.

Love lives in each of us, but because of fears of being misunderstood or rejected, we are afraid to release it. Be sure to be kind to yourself and your loved ones.

There comes a moment in everyone's life when you need to understand that the past no longer exists. You are and you are now.

Interviewed by Albina Garifullina