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How to rekindle feelings. How to rekindle cold feelings? Our feminine strength: creation and destruction

A crisis family life Is a problem that every couple faces. Usually, a number of main intervals of the decline in relations are distinguished here. The so-called "critical points" are actually regularly repeated in the first, third, fifth, seventh years of the relationship. The final one awaits some - a divorce. In order to prevent this at such stages, women think about preserving the "home". They are trying to figure out how to rekindle the love of the husband. Of course, it all depends on the specific situation. However, there are some universal tips.

Start by updating yourself

Get rid of all used jackets and robes. The latter will be appropriate if the dressing gown itself is lace, and you feel more attractive and sexy in it. You must remain a woman under all circumstances.

It will not be superfluous to update your wardrobe, experiment a little with appearance. The main thing is that husband will pay attention again.

But do not overdo it, otherwise it may lead to more big problems... The spouse can easily become jealous and suspect of infidelity. And this is definitely not leading to good.

The second step is "nice little things"

To achieve the location of the husband towards yourself should be gradually, step by step. And there are options here:

Compliment your spouse. So he will understand that you are not indifferent. After all, often married couples who have lived together for a long time stop giving due attention to their life partners. With this, the "unfortunate cold" comes into the relationship. It's easy to keep them warm. The secret is to remember to say warm words.

Confess your love more often. But this can be done both orally and in writing. Invaluable help will be provided mobile phone or the internet. Send messages like "Know that I love you" or "I really miss you, I really want to see you." Observe only one rule - be specific about your expressions. Those phrases that will be addressed only to him will be touched and impressed.

Merge with your husband

According to statistics, in the column "reason for divorce" men most often mention the absence of close relationships. Another reason for a breakup is a lack of tenderness and affection. In order not to make such mistakes, talk heart to heart. If you compare the relationship on initial stage and through certain time, then you can see the established pattern. Over time, the interest of partners in each other cools down.

In the first days of acquaintance, everyone tries to find out more information... Later there comes a moment when, it would seem, you know absolutely everything. But this is a delusion. It is not for nothing that there is an opinion that you can solve your other half all your life.

A droplet of evenings of discussion of pressing issues, exchange of thoughts and opinions on different topics and even just conversations about memories - they will rally and unite you into one whole.

Be like yin and yang

Here are some tips to help you mend your old relationship:

Bring back the escaped romance

The longer the couple is together, the less romance becomes in their life. Walking under the moonlight, going to the cinema is a real rarity. Instead, it’s commonplace to watch TV at home. And it's better to keep silent about the cafe: sheer extra expenses.

But going out in pairs will help to cause old feelings, rekindle the love of her husband. It is better to use new ideas, this is very important in family life.

Show your imagination, do not be afraid to embody non-standard ideas:

  • Throw an unusual party, pretend you haven't met your husband before. Try to get to know each other again;
  • Go to karaoke, sing your love song in unison;
  • Organize a culinary evening, cook together delicious exotic dishes that you have not been able to taste before.

Only correct decision how to rekindle a husband's love, no. But simple little tricks can help bring back old feelings. In such situations, women need to recall the words of the American writer, an expert in the field of family relations, John Gray: "Men experience elation, good spirits and a burst of energy when they feel needed ...".

Video: how to return the former feelings of a spouse?

In this video family psychologist Denis Kostin will tell you what steps you need to take to win your husband's love again:

"We choose, we are chosen - as it often does not coincide," - Svetlana Kryuchkova sang in the famous film. What if "matched"?

ENVY OF THE GODS

The ancient Greeks had a wonderful legend about the androgyne - a creature that combines both female and male signs... The androgyne was considered omnipotent, so the envious gods tore him in two. And since then, as the legend says, the male and female halves have been looking for each other to the sad sounds of a violin. The violin cries from sympathy to to a weak person who has lost his happiness. Of course, it happens that the halves meet, with some sixth sense they recognize their betrothed or betrothed. But now they are connected loving hearts extremely rare: the envy of the gods. No wonder, apparently, in the old days they believed: in reckless, frantic love there is some kind of pathology. You cannot love an earthly person more than anything else: this is how world harmony is violated, and Heaven begins to be jealous.

Ideal love is like a calm but deep river flowing into the sea. And there are lakes, streams, and waterfalls. Even musty swamps can be found, it is almost impossible to get out of them. So what if your feeling is not like a movie or book fairy tale? All people are different, so there are no ready-made models of behavior and recipes for love.
But if you firmly know that you have found the One with whom you are ready to live to the grave, you are sure that you are loved, but you doubt the decisiveness of your knight (what to do, men tend to be afraid of family ties!), They will help you love conspiracies... Their strength is individual approach: every element of the conspiracy.

"WATER" SPOTS

For example, these conspiracies are most suitable if your beloved according to the horoscope belongs to water signs - Pisces, Cancer or Scorpio, because these texts are based precisely on the capabilities of the water element:

"Lord, bless the True Christ. I will go, the servant of God (name), blessing and crossing myself, into an open field, to the blue sea. In the blue sea sea ​​fish... Throw down the net, draw out the sea fish. As hard for a sea fish to live without water, so it would be hard for a servant of God (name) to live without a servant of God (name). She would not perednote day, nor would she spend the night, would not sleep, would not fall asleep, would not eat food and would not take a drink. In the sea, fish and fish converge, so the servant of God (name) would converge with me and would not leave me, he would not look enough, he wouldn’t grow up and love for me would have always, now and forever, and forever centuries. Amen".

WIND HELP

But the conspiracy below will work better if your lover has a sign according to the horoscope, that is, if he is Aquarius, Gemini or Libra. Well, if you yourself are from the "air" breed, it will be even easier for you to come to an agreement with "Uncle Vikhorem Vikhorevich". The conspiracy is as follows: "I, the servant of God (name), blessing, I will go, crossing myself, from the hut with doors, from the courtyard with the gates into an open field, bow and pray to twelve winds and twelve whirlwinds. The same winds and the same whirlwinds have an uncle. Vikhor Vikhorevich. And just as he cannot live without the winds, and a man without food, and a fish without water, so the servant of God (name) could not live without the chain-link of God (name), neither be, nor day days, nor sleep nights and not a thought to think, and not a thought to think early in the morning, late in the evening, on the old and young, and to block the month. "

FIRE POWER

For representatives of the element of Fire, conspiracies are suitable that read into the flame of a candle (the window or window should be slightly open at this time), into the fire from the stove or fireplace. Perfect option- in nature near a burning fire. "I, the servant of God (name), go from door to door, from gate to gate. To the east side, in the Okiyane-sea. In the Okiyane-sea there is a stone. There is a table on the stone. Mother is sitting at the table. Holy Mother of God... I ask You, I pray You, help me, help me. So that the servant of God (name) does not forget the servant of God (name): he does not eat up in food, he doesn’t binge in gulba, he falls asleep in his sleep, he doesn’t walk in steps! To think and guess, interpret and decide about the servant of God (name). As this smoke winds, so this slave (name) beats against the servant of God (name). Which words she herself did not finish, which the teacher did not finish teaching, be my words, strong and molding! Stronger than stone and wood. Amen. "And this conspiracy is spoken of for food or drink, with which the bewitched is treated:" I will rise, the servant of God (name), blessing, I will go, crossing myself, out of the hut with doors and out of the entryway with gates, behind the gates and lapels, I will go out into the open field; v open field blue ocean; in the blue sea lies a white stone. That white stone the husband stands, chops down a dry tree and puts it on the fire. As soon as a dry tree flared up abruptly on the fire, so soon and abruptly the heart of the servant of God (name) would burst into the heart of the servant of God (name). Be non-agreements and negotiations, all my words, in full, and do not attack, my words, neither on land, nor at sea, nor on dark woods, nor on violent winds, but attack, my words, the servant of God into a zealous heart, into clear eyes, into white breasts, into the veins of the back, into lust and flesh. Just as a fish cannot live without water and a child without a mother, so the servant of God (name) could not live without the servant of God (name). All my words are in the sea with a key, a lock in my mouth, I lock it, I lock it forever. Amen".

EARTH ANNOUNCEMENT

If your beloved in the horoscope is Taurus, Virgo or Capricorn, use conspiracies with a predominance of the elements of the earth. For example, something like this:

"There is a land of wondrousness. Like the sea on the Okyana, on the island on Buyan there is the white-combustible stone Alatyr, on that stone there is a fire-fired bathhouse, in that bathhouse there is a kindling board, on that board there are thirty-three longings. melancholy and longing rush from wall to wall, from corner to corner, from floor to ceiling, from there through all the paths and roads and crossroads, by air and air. (name), to his rear, to the Face, to clear eyes, to the sugar mouth, to the zealous heart, to the mind and mind, to the will and desire, to the whole white body and to all the hot blood, and to all his bones, and in all joints - in 70 joints, half-joints and sub-joints, and in all his veins - in 70 he lived, half-lived and sinews - so that he yearned, grieved, wept and wept every day, every hour, every time for a red girl (name ), I could not stay anywhere like a fish without water. and the crossroads with trepidation, depression, with crying and sobbing, would have walked and run in a hurry, I could not have been without her for a single minute. This word is affirmation and strengthening; it is also confirmed and strengthened by it, and is closed. If anyone, besides me, tries to unlock this fear from a person, then wake like a worm in a nut fistula. And nothing - neither air, nor storm, nor water - this matter does not unlock. "If you have not yet found out who your beloved according to the horoscope, use a conspiracy that suits your sign.

Developments

How many times have you felt like you were giving up on your partner? You have the feeling that you are not understood at all. You feel that you are no longer bound by something inexplicable. It seems like fire and passion have left your relationship.

But everyone wants to feel this passion again. Here are a few simple ways reignite the fire in the relationship and keep it going:

1. Don't forget about dating. Although this has been said a thousand times already, it is actually effective. Couples who don't go anywhere and don't suit each other romantic dates, begin to gradually treat each other as furniture in the house. You need to arrange this kind of date for yourself every week.

Tidy yourself up and dress nicely for your partner. Go to a restaurant, go bowling, or just take a walk. In fact, it doesn't matter where exactly you decide to go, the main thing is that it is knocked out of your daily routine. When you're out on a date, treat each other the way you did when you first started dating.

2. Always meet each other appropriately. When your close person returns home late, meet him at the door and kiss him hard. Do not shout from the next room: "Hello, how are you?" If you are in different rooms apartments, then just go to your partner and give him long Kiss... This little gesture actually means a lot.

3. Don't forget to kiss. When you wake up in the morning, be sure to kiss your partner. Forget about the morning staleness of breath. Who cares? The important thing is that we show our love from the first minutes of the beginning of the day, and this is how we start it. The same should be done before going to bed. You should always feel cared for and loved before falling asleep. Too many couples go to bed, each on their own side of the bed, without bothering to kiss their partner and say goodnight.

4. Start fighting the routine. Great importance to keep the fire going in your relationship is the desire and the drive to overcome the daily routine. One of the best ways to do this is to create romantic mood... Light the candles. If you tend to watch TV in the evening, why not place lit candles around the house? Do whatever you want outside of your daily routine.

5. Send SMS to your partner for no particular reason. Send your loved one a little reminder in the middle of the day that you love and think about them. With existence Email and text messages it is very simple, but very effective. You can even leave a voice message. Just one text message about your love will make your partner feel happier.

6. Leave small notes. Everyone loves surprises, so try to please your partner more often with little notes, thrown into his bag or briefcase. If you leave for work earlier, you can leave a note like "I'll be thinking about you all day" or "I love the time when we are together." Write something simple but pretty. Remind your partner of something that will tell him how good you are when you are together.

7. Be mentally always together, even if you are far from each other. If you are on a business trip or are absent for any other reason, always write before leaving romantic letter to your partner. It's even better if you leave a few notes so that you can read them every day while you are away.

If your partner is away, then write him this kind of message with you. it
lets our loved ones know what we think of them. Saving each other before
of all, in thought is one of the most significant components required for
keeping the relationship on fire.

10 tips to rekindle dead passion in a relationship

You have been married for several years, and your marriage is quite successful, but you notice that old passion no, and you make love less and less, because you are tired, and there are no new sensations. Everything is familiar and hackneyed. Maybe everyone is like that?
It turns out not. Many married couples admit that, having experienced such a crisis of sensuality, they were able to discover new horizons for themselves. How? Here are some tips offered by renowned sexologists, psychotherapists and simply "experienced spouses."
1. Sex is feelings

The well-known sexologist Dilya Yenikeyeva compares sex with a singing duet: “Singers can sing in unison, but they can each lead their own part. if you want improvisation, the second will be easily adjusted. "

Of course, sex at thirty is not at all the same as sex at eighteen. In youth, everything is simpler - hormones play in the blood, you can stay up all night, and in the morning there will be fresh roses, there are great hopes and plans ahead, and you yourself are beautiful, like Aphrodite.

Over the years, along with beauty, self-confidence also disappears (especially if your beloved husband periodically reminds you of overweight and wrinkles),
family chores eats up all strength, and the body itself begs to allocate an hour for sleep, and not for sex.

Still, sexual satisfaction is primarily related to overall marital satisfaction. If the spouses are happy with their intimate relationships, then this creates a background against which their relationships develop in other areas. This background influences the success of these relationships, and satisfaction with sex, in turn, depends on these relationships.

What to do? To begin with, honestly answer yourself the question: is everything good between you in everyday relationships? If not, look for the starting point from which the discord began and close the emotional gap.

2. Pamper each other!

In one of the songs of Vadim Egorov there is a wonderful phrase: "Least of all love goes to those whom we love most"!

It’s a paradox: we don’t forget to blame our husband for all the troubles we have accumulated during the day, we express our claims, we pull it out in front of our friends. Where is the tenderness? Spouses who do not forget to express tenderness and love to each other, as a rule, do not grow cold towards each other in bed.

How long have you served your husband coffee in bed? When was the last time he rubbed your back in the bathroom? Do you walk in the evenings with the moon?

Each family eventually has its own "recipes". The more often you show each other your positive emotions, the stronger your sexual bond!

3. Tired Bodies Have Tired Sex

Which of us married ladies, did not get into a situation where you want to sleep from fatigue, and your husband suddenly takes the initiative? If you refuse - your husband is offended, you agree - you lie tortured, and irritation rises in your soul: what does he want? And it happens the other way around: you go to him, and he has a "headache"!

What to do? Give each other the opportunity to rest.

I have acquaintances of married couples "with experience" who have solved this issue (again, each in its own way!). Some send children to their grandmother and ask them not to bother them with phone calls and visits on Saturday. Others - who don't have to rush to work by eight - reschedule sex into the morning. Still others, on the other hand, put the children to bed and pay attention to each other from ten to midnight. An old friend of mine says that for her sex is measured not by quantity, but by quality: even less often, but "by full program"!

4. Leave problems outside the door!

Do not drag business problems into the house. Do not take home documents that you did not have time to review at work. Phone calls a friend of an hour and a half can also be postponed.

If you are waiting for an important call, use an answering machine, now buying it is not a problem, and you will save a lot of precious time and mental strength, saving yourself from unproductive communication and many trifling matters.

If on this day you have many unresolved business problems, it is better not to plan for this evening intimate relationships since thinking about what has not yet been done will not give you a chance to relax.

5. Sometimes it is worth communicating your intentions to your husband!

If in the morning you busily tell your spouse: "Dear, we have an evening for sex!" - then this is one attitude. And if in the morning you are in high spirits, waiting for a pleasant evening, and during work you will call your husband several times, saying that you are looking forward to the evening, you will come home from work at least half an hour earlier to cook light dinner for two, take care of champagne or wine in advance, take a shower or a bath, then you will have great mood that your husband will immediately feel.

6. Avoid the traps!

According to sexologists, the most common bedside trap is the same scenario. Sooner or later, but there comes a period when the intimate sides of the partner are well studied, and therefore, making love, the spouses immediately "take the bull by the horns", i.e. use those caresses that are guaranteed to bring results.

Think for yourself: if you feed a person every day with fried potatoes (halva, pineapple, shrimp), then there will come a moment when at one glance at this product you will feel sick. So in any case, the "menu" needs to be diversified.

7. Don't turn your husband into a girlfriend!

Generally, this Golden Rule for married life... Remember always: next to you is a man! And this man needs to be seduced and conquered every day.

In practice, it turns out differently. The wife spins in front of the mirror and complains to her husband that she has added twenty kilograms, has become "like a cow" and does not fit into any skirt. Returning from the dentist, he says that there are twenty holes in the teeth and in general it is necessary to save up for a false jaw. Or they start discussing the purchase of an anti-cellulite cream with my husband. In general, she does everything that in the first days of acquaintance she would never have done!

Of course, when a wife starts complaining to her husband, she wants her husband to say: "Darling, you are beautiful!" But husbands usually don't say that. They do not see any hints in your words. They take their word for it. Once the wife said that she is old, fat, ugly, with cellulite and caries, - so it is. And who wants to go to bed with such a woman?

Think this is what you are trying to achieve?

8. Add humor!

Who told you that sex is serious? Sometimes The best way to return the former passion - to laugh.

In many women's magazines offer simple recipes, like meeting your husband from work naked in an apron. Allegedly, he will immediately pounce on you like a beast. I had a case when one guy became a victim of such a meeting: "I came home tired, like the last bastard, and on the doorstep my wife is naked and in an apron. I almost fainted: do I really have to have sex?"

One friend of this recipe redrew in her own way: she met her husband not just naked in an apron, but on roller skates! The husband laughed so hard! The night was amazing. True, that husband had a sense of humor. If yours does, try it.

9. Memories are your ally!

My colleague once said: “We have lived with my husband for ten years. And if there is any coldness between us, I take out our old photographs. We sit with my husband in the evening, sorting through them, remember the good things that happened between us. , smile, laugh. The necessary vibes pass between us. We understand that we still love each other, and we talk about it. And then ... We seem to be carried away into our first nights, into our passion ... In general, this is wonderful - to be in love with your own husband! "

10. Flirt!

You and I know what to flirt with by a stranger easy: to smile languidly, to look so that all the insides of this stranger will shrink into a lump with desire, and a million other similar things. It's much harder to flirt with own husband!

Well, for example, when going on a visit or for a walk, take a moment to whisper to him the scenario of your night. And while visiting, look into his eyes and, imperceptibly for others, run your foot over him (this is usually done by some sexy heroines in the film - probably not in vain), or stroke your knee with a pen, and then move it higher. Should I teach you!

Don't miss the opportunity to dance. Say compliments, laugh at his jokes, kiss in the ear - in general, you know your husband as flaky! And the result will certainly be!

Remember: your passion is still here! She just got dusty from everyday problems. Blow off the dust and enjoy life!

In general, this is natural. After all, according to psychologists, falling in love lasts a maximum of 3 years - this period, according to the calculations of nature, is enough for a man and a woman to create a social unit and acquire offspring.

Then there is no time for love: the wife must raise the children, and the husband must provide for the family. In fact, all this is much more complicated.

Let's start over ...
During the period active search A woman does not allow herself to relax in her future life partner: she always looks well-groomed, attractive and desirable.

Whatever one may say, namely on appearance and a man "bites", and only then he begins to be interested inner peace representatives of the fair sex. But, as soon as the chosen one got into the net and started spinning serious relationship, living together or marriage, a woman's behavior changes markedly.

Lace and silk negligees are replaced by tracksuits, stretched jerseys and plush robes, and hair and makeup - on curlers and a cucumber-sour cream mask.

If this description, at least partially, but suits you, then it's time to act. The transformation of a woman into a wife is perhaps one of the most common reasons male cheating.

And believe me, most men won't get hard work find the one that will not meet him with a rolling pin at the ready and a bunch of problems.

If the seductress is purposeful, a man can quickly go over to her side - to where he is more comfortable. Of course, there is a high probability that after a few years the family destroyer will repeat the same scheme and your husband will run away from her, but are you ready to wait for him? And most importantly, why? If you do not want to change something now, then you are unlikely to take any steps later.

Do you not like this scenario and are you ready to do anything to save your family?
Then set the rules.

  • Take care of yourself. Believe me, this is not as difficult as it might seem at first. Make masks for hair, face and body only in the bathroom - your spouse does not have to see you smear yourself with salad or wrap your hair with plastic. Manicure and pedicure will do great in the salon - besides, you yourself, hunched over in three deaths, try to evenly paint your toenails.
  • Look great. The house is of course not a podium, but after all, no one asks to meet her husband every evening in evening dress and on extreme stiletto heels. A home suit, a simple but flattering dress, is quite suitable. Add small wedge slippers or cute socks to them.
  • Think positively. No, you don't need to constantly smile at all 32, but trying to see the advantages in any situation is a must. Such an attitude will help solve most of the problems, and entrust the unsolvable to a husband who is smart and responsible. By the way, this is one of the ways to raise his self-esteem.
  • To compliment. Of course, only when the husband deserves it. But do not overdo it - he will become arrogant and decide that you are not good enough for him, so magnificent.

Do not forget that family relationships- hard enough work. And if passion burns on its own reserves of fuel, then, having passed into a state of love, it will need additional "firewood".

For the soul

Nobody canceled romance. Of course, you won't be able to have dinner by candlelight every evening and walk under the moonlight, but sending the children to grandparents for the weekend and spending time together is not such a difficult task.

Order your favorite meals at a delivery restaurant, open a bottle of wine, light candles. Imagine that the years you have lived together are not yet and you are on your first date again ... A wave of memories and old passion will cover you headlong.

For body

Do not forget about the main barometer of relationships in a couple - sex. In no case should it turn into marital duty.

However, if you wish, you can also return even a faded passion. Do not forget that a man is primarily a visual. Kindle in it sexual desire the fastest way to get it is if you put on something seductive.

It could be underwear with delicate lace, a negligee made of fine silk or guipure, a dress with an exciting neckline, open back slim fit or short enough to leave no doubt about your intentions.

Try it role-playing games- Try on the image of a seductive nurse, a naive schoolgirl or a daring pirate. The husband may be embarrassed, but only in the first few minutes.
You can find sexy outfits in many stores.

Believe me, your partner will agree to participate in such shopping and certainly will not, as usual, be bored on the couch while you are shopping.
Share your fantasies and secret desires with each other, experiment - try everything that is interesting and acceptable for both of you. Add zest to your sex life.