Gestures of superiority and power used by confident people. Upturned chin demonstration thumbs, throwing hands behind the head - all this speaks of the superiority of man. Sometimes people do not notice these gestures, but if you learn to recognize them, then you can easily neutralize the interlocutor.

Confident man folds hands in the "spire" connecting fingertips. He is confident in what he says and what he does. Indicating his power and superiority, a person uses forefinger . This is especially evident when he threatens and indicates to the interlocutor. Usage turned palm down speaks of an order, when an open palm up is a request. You can often notice a person who impulsively says something, while sharply moving his palm turned down. This gesture can be recognized as a decree, discontent and superiority.

Supremacy and dominance can show when shaking hands. If the interlocutor, greeting you, wraps his other hand around his wrist or covers his hand on the other side, then he wants to show his dominance over you. Aggressive and dominant people have a firm handshake. The role of the owner and initiator is assumed by the person who gives his hand down with his palm, on the contrary, the person refuses to be the main one in this situation. Similarly, if the hand is extended far from oneself - the initiator and the owner, and close to oneself - the rejection of dominance.

To neutralize dominant person when shaking hands, come close to him and take a position on the left, vigorously shake your outstretched hand, while transferring it to a vertical position. Another way to use the second hand is to put it on top of the partner’s arm, clasp the wrist, elbow or shoulder. If you want to keep your distance and not violate your "personal space", offer a straight hand and lightly shake your partner's fingers.

Status people tend to lay their hands behind their backs, grabbing one hand with the other. walking around hands behind back and even throwing the selections up, a person demonstrates his importance and power. This posture is typical of police officers, senior officers, directors, and just a person who takes high position. In this position, the chest, stomach, heart and other parts of the body remain open, so a person demonstrates his fearlessness. Try in moments of stress and tension, for example, during a report, put your hands behind your back, clasping your hands. In this position, you will immediately feel confident and relaxed. Do not confuse this gesture with grabbing the wrist, elbow and forearm, which means tension and discomfort. In this case: the higher the grip, the greater the irritation.

smoking people can demonstrate their superiority and dominance with cigarettes and cigars. It has to do with the release of smoke. Up smoke or nostrils, speaks of confident and positive person. How exhale smoke faster the stronger he feels his superiority. Cigars are also used to show superiority, as they are expensive and long.

Hands behind the head

If a person put his hands behind his head, then this is a sign of clear superiority. Directors, accountants, lawyers, managers, and managers like to take this position. The pose is enhanced by throwing the leg on the knee and speaks of some kind of aggression. The gesture of the hand behind the head speaks for the person: “I know everything and am not afraid of anything!”, “Everything is under control!”. Such a gesture is characteristic of arrogant know-it-alls, so it repels.

There are several ways to get the interlocutor out of this pose:
- lean forward, turn your palms around and say: “you probably understand this issue, you could express your opinion”, lean back, leaving your palms open, wait for an answer;
- show something to the interlocutor so that he turns or stands;
- give him something to watch or ask him to pass something;
- Another way that can be used in case of equality is to copy the pose with your hands behind your head. This will demonstrate equality and harmony.

Thumb manipulation is a gesture of superiority

Thumb manipulation is also referred to as dominance gestures. In non-verbal usage, the thumbs show superiority, dominance, and even aggressiveness.

Demo Gestures thumb can use:
- a courting man in front of a chosen one;
- self-confident managers in front of subordinates;
- a person dressed expensively and prestigiously can emphasize his confidence and authority;
- to highlight new clothes.

To demonstrate the thumbs, they use pockets, hiding all the rest in it. Similarly, you can hide your fingers behind the lapels of a jacket or jacket, bend your fingers into a fist or hide them under your arms. If at the same time a person steps from heel to toe, then it gives the impression of an overestimation of growth, which means his position.
Crossed arms hidden under the armpits, while the thumbs are demonstratively extended upwards, speak of superiority and negative attitude.
The thumb can also be used as a mockery or disrespect. It replaces the index when the interlocutor speaks negatively about another person, while pointing as if at him. This gesture is accompanied unpleasant words: "You know, women are all like that!"
The thumbs in the "hands on the hips" position will also speak of superiority and confidence. This position is usually taken by the aggressor or a person who is ready for action. Pointed elbows to the sides demonstrate power over the situation. However, such a posture can hide weakness and insecurity.

Demonstration of power

Demonstration of power characteristic of politicians and managers. Usually, during a conversation, the status of the owner is emphasized by raising the level of the location of his body. For this use:
- high back chair
— elevated level floor location;
— the location of guests in the social zone of the office;
- the use of a rotating and movable chair, allowing you to move freely;
- increasing the territory (a large table; a large space where only you are located);
- surrounding yourself with objects of competence (diplomas, certificates, photographs, etc.).

A sense of superiority as a quality of a person is a tendency to exalt oneself in the hope of greater respect from others, to evaluate oneself unrealistically, overestimated, to be convinced that one is better than others.

Three pilgrims pray. First: “God, who am I before You? A weightless speck of dust, inaccessible to the eye, driven by the wind. The second: “God, how small I am before Your greatness! The smallest, most insignificant atom, lost in the abyss of space. Third: “God, how tiny I am before You! Little worm ... "The first to the second: -" No, well, did you see this, with delusions of grandeur?

Do you remember, when talking with colleagues or friends, you were patted on the shoulder or back in a friendly way, hugged confidentially, nodded sanctioningly (everything they say is right), or showed imposing indulgence? Or maybe you remember how you were told: “Stop talking nonsense” or “Stop talking nonsense”? Or, in a milder form, they said: “Well, okay ... You will ...”, “Remember once and for all ...”, “Well, well, well ...”, “Well, how can you not understand that ...”? If you remembered, then you had to deal with a demonstration of superiority.

The natural desire of every person is to communicate with him from the standpoint of equality. The need for superiority is inherent in animals. In the struggle for survival, the strongest survive, that is, the superior. In the wolf pack, there is a confrontation for the right to be the leader. To become Akela, one must prove one's superiority.

In human society, a highly moral person will not indulge his desire to establish superiority over other people and will communicate with them from a position of equality. All of us, albeit unconsciously, but understand that we humiliate demonstrating his superiority under the sign of false participation and sympathy. The ascension of one is the humiliation of the other.

Demonstration of superiority leads to conflict, as it "turns on" the opponent's aggression ("put you in your place"), which is explained by not wanting to lose one's dignity. For example, your half decided to make borscht. Seeing this, you declare with good intentions: “My mother makes borscht very well. Call her. She will teach you." And suddenly you see that the wife's borscht enthusiasm has disappeared. What's the matter? She deciphered the subtext of your words: “You are worse than my mother. If you can't, don't take it." The husband involuntarily indicated his superiority, trying to hide it under the guise of participation and a desire to help.

Or another example. You got into an argument with a friend. She is obviously flustered, and you, fixing this, say: "Don't worry." It feels good. You tried to calm her down, and she became even more nervous, while claiming that she was calm as a tank. What happened? A friend caught superiority in your words when she heard the following: “Hysterical and psychopath. You don’t think anything, but you prove something. ” The words “calm down”, “don't worry”, “don't be nervous”, “don't get upset” cause an even greater emotional outburst of aggression from your opponent. The tension is rising.

I wonder why some people show their superiority? You will probably say: “they consider themselves the smartest, and others are fools”, “know-it-alls”, “think a lot about themselves”, “think too high of themselves”. In other words, you are assuming that he has high self-esteem. But this is only at first glance. A person with high self-esteem lives with himself in harmony. He fully accepts himself with all his strengths and weaknesses. Since he likes himself, he does not need to demonstrate his virtues to himself and others. A high self-evaluation is not friendly with superiority. The latter has a true girlfriend - low self-esteem. Therefore, it is necessary to assert oneself in some way. You can, of course, take the path of self-improvement. You can do something worthwhile and, thereby, raise your self-esteem both in your own eyes and in the eyes of others. But this is the way strong people. A person with low self-esteem will begin to humiliate others. Thus, he will illusory self-affirm. His demonstration of superiority is nothing more than an attempt to hide inner insecurity and lack of inner merit. He tries to cover his weakness with the thought that others are weaker than him. Instead of overcoming the weakness, he drives it even deeper inside. Refusal to demonstrate superiority is just what it is Right way to increased self-esteem and self-respect. You can only demonstrate superiority in kindness.

Thus, illusory self-affirmation through comparison and humiliation of others creates an idealization of superiority. Huge energy efforts aimed at confirming their superiority are wasted. Pay attention to self improvement, without focusing on their imaginary significance. Having eliminated anxiety about confirming your significance, you will stop paying "tribute" to egregor. Your self-confidence will only increase.

At the same time, in life we ​​are faced with situations when it is impossible not to recognize the real superiority of the opponent in those areas of life where he is really a coryphaeus. For example, pairs student-professor, patient-doctor, amateur-professional. In general, it must be remembered that it is difficult to find a person who would not be superior to us in anything. Unless you're a plumber, it's foolish to assume that you're better at gaskets and faucets. The thing is that we love to talk about topics where we are strong. If you want to earn a reputation as a charming person, you must do the opposite - talk about topics that are interesting to your opponent, where he is strong enough.

Superiority is the real illusion. There is a wonderful story about this. Once a student came to the master and began to complain about his life. The master listened to him and, without saying a word, handed him a bundle from the Ancient Book of Knowledge. The student read: “See the Illusion as an illusion. Understand and know at last that We are All One. Humanity and all Life is a single field. It's all the same. Therefore, there is nothing that can be higher than something, and there is nothing that one can be higher than. This is the most important truth that Life teaches. Is a tulip taller than a rose? Are the mountains more beautiful than the sea? Which of the snowflakes is the most magnificent? Is it possible that they are all magnificent - and that, as they celebrate their magnificence together, they create an awe-inspiring spectacle? Then they melt, merge with each other and form a unity. But they don't disappear. They never stop being. They just change shape. And not once, but many: they pass from a solid state to a liquid state, from liquid to vapor, from the visible to the invisible, in order to rise again and then return again in the form of new snowflakes of amazing beauty. This is Life that nourishes Life. This is you. The perfect metaphor. Real metaphor. It will become the reality of your experience when you simply decide that it is true and start doing it. See the amazing beauty of all these lives that you come into contact with. Because each of you is truly wonderful, and yet no one is more wonderful than any other. And one day you will merge into Unity and then you will know that together you form a single stream.

Petr Kovalev 2013

There are people - patriots of the territory in which they live. For them, the concept of "neighbor" is sacred, for them the power in this territory is the highest. Let's call these people "gardeners". And there are people who do not depend on territorial associations. These are "nomads".

In Asia, they say this: “If an Uzbek or a Turkmen has money, he buys or builds himself a beautiful good big house. If a Tatar or a Kazakh has money, he buys the most expensive jeep for himself and rushes around the steppe in it.”

Nomads and gardeners have completely different perceptions of the world. These two types of people live in different conditions and are formed differently.

The gardener strains twice a year, during sowing and harvesting. The rest of the time he lies on his back, spits at the ceiling and indulges in drunkenness, stupidity and other positive activities. But when sowing or harvesting comes, the gardener strains with all his might. That is, he lives in a mode of idleness, which is replaced by an emergency, prohibitive tension. This way of life is inevitably reflected in the nature of the gardener.

The nomad is busy 365 days a year - not for one day can he leave the herd unattended. I'm not talking about some village shepherd who has ten cows, and he is usually mentally retarded, shepherds them. Imagine how five or six shepherds live, driving two or three thousand heads of cattle across the steppe. Such activity leaves an imprint on the whole life of a nomad.

The nomads look at the gardeners with superiority, because the gardener has nowhere to go, and the nomad can always leave. The nomad considers himself above any authority, because there is no one above him. If a power comes in that is objectionable to a nomad, he will simply turn his herds around and leave for another territory. He does not care about this power. If the power came, objectionable to the gardener, he would still obey it. Because the authorities absolutely do not care about whether the gardener likes it or not, and he has no choice - he is tied to his land.

You can take away his herds from a nomad, but if he saves at least a couple of sheep, he will have new herds in a year or two. And he can restore any property.

A gardener's wife is a mistress. Mistress not only of the house and garden, but also of himself. After all, a woman is busy 365 days a year, she cannot leave the house without her work. At the same time, the male gardener is busy only twice a year, and the rest of the time he indulges in drunkenness, stupidity and idleness. So, all this rest of the time he is crushed by his active wife.

A wife for a nomad is a partner. When the camp moves, in front, where the most dangerous territory, armed adult men go, young boys go on the sides, and behind are children and old people, who, nevertheless, represent some kind of striking force. And women and small children always go in the middle. But here the nomad camp stops at a temporary parking lot. Adult men and young boys are dispersing in all directions, patrols. Children and old people stand around the camp. And the women must set up yurts, prepare food to feed the sentinels who will return, and the children and old people who guard them. This is a partnership, and the position of a female partner is different from that of a woman - the mistress of the garden.

On the other hand, every woman among the nomads is well aware that if she loses her husband, she will lose everything - property, freedom, and possibly life. And any man understands perfectly well that if he loses a woman, his life will become very complicated. He will have to do without food for some time, because he cannot protect himself and cook food at the same time, he will have to do without comfort, without a yurt, without warmth. Nomadic life forms a completely different type of relationship between a man and a woman.

For gardeners, a brother is a rival. Either the father's garden must be divided with his brother, or he must be driven out in order to leave the garden to himself alone. A brother for a nomad is a partner, one who always come first for help. This leaves an imprint on the community of people.

A different way of life forms completely different attitude to reality.

For example, for a nomad to steal something is a valor, a brilliant theme, but for a gardener it is a nightmare, horror, a crime. In the same way, the destruction of the one who encroached on you, the nomads will consider valor, and gardeners - a crime.

How do nomads and gardeners treat each other?

A gardener for a nomad is a drunkard, a lazy person, a mediocrity, an earthworm and, in general, a subhuman. This is a resource that can be used as a slave, or just dirt underfoot if it cannot be used. A nomad for a gardener is a free person who is looked upon with envy, hatred and fear.

As an example, I will give telephone conversation during one of the conflicts in the south of the country:

- Who are you?

- I'm the mayor of the city.

“You earthworm, listen to me carefully,” the Nomad says and sets out his position. A nomad cannot communicate otherwise, because for him any gardener is a slave, no matter what position he occupies.

The country in which we live, Russia, has its own specifics, a special mentality.

Please note that Russians are the only people who use an adjective for their name. All other peoples use nouns - "Englishman", "Frenchman", "German", "Scotchman" and so on.

In ancient times there was a noun "Rusich". It is wrong to think that the adjective "Russian" came from him - this is absolutely different words. The etymology of these words is very simple, and it explains a lot.

How long the state structure existed on the territory of Russia, it has always had a very clear division - into rulers and the people, who had nothing to do with the rulers. Once upon a time, cheerful guys arrived, people from the region of Rus, in southern Sweden. They called themselves "Russians". These newcomers seized power, began to rule the local people and sell them like cattle into slavery. I have always wondered why the princes sold their people into slavery, because none of the rulers anywhere acted like that. The answer is simple - it was not their people. The Rus are the conquerors of the land. Rusich is a descendant of Rus. And the Russian is the slave of the Rus.

Millennia, centuries of slavery have left their mark on the inhabitants of the country. When you look at a person, it immediately clicks in your head, and you determine at the subconscious level whether he is a serf or a master, a master or a slave. Russian people are accustomed to only two models of behavior - the master or the slave, the third is not given. After all, only one hundred and fifty years have passed, only seven generations have changed since the abolition of serfdom. And in the twentieth century, for seventy years, we have been in the "slave-master" system. Where there is a rigid class division, there is always opposition, but there is no unity and cannot be.

If we look at peoples who did not have such a rigid class division, or it was a very long time ago and has already been forgotten, we will see a completely different model of behavior.

For example, the Cossacks have always had unity. The Cossacks are, after all, the remnants of the Russian Horde army, they do not consider themselves Russians, they consider themselves an absolutely separate people, and, unlike the Russians, they never had a class division. There was no Cossack - serf, and there was no Cossack - master. And there was a completely different philosophy of life.

Why Empires vs. Enclaves

The empire is a clear class division into masters and servants, it is a rigid hierarchical vertical of power in which everyone firmly knows their place and their rights and obligations. Moreover, it always turns out that rights are mainly for some, while others have obligations. The imperial scheme remains unchanged, not only from the time of Byzantium or ancient egypt, and, probably, from the moment of the birth of human civilization. And if you live in this territory, you have nowhere to go. You are either forced to find your place in this scheme yourself, or other people will indicate this place to you.

But there is a force that is more powerful than any empire. These are worldwide enclaves, associations of people who speak different languages, have different looks, but live according to the laws of brotherhood, and not the territory of residence. Enclaves were before empires and will be after. The gardener is a slave of the Empire. A nomad is a member of an enclave and will always be outside of any imperial control scheme. All attempts to drive him to a certain place will end in nothing. He will simply leave, take away the property, transfer money to the accounts of other companies - that's all. Of course, such people set an example for others. But are they admired? No, they are hated. Therefore, as soon as any imperial scheme is strengthened, the enclaves are immediately persecuted.

In Russia, and throughout the Slavic world, the Jewish community traditionally begins to be persecuted. As soon as any system appears, a social order appears - anti-Semitism raises its head.

In the United States, the traditional target of persecution is the Muslim ummah. As soon as it becomes necessary to find an enemy, an anti-Islamic scheme immediately begins to work, some invented international terrorism becomes to blame for everything.

Everyone writes about the events of September 11, but no one mentions one very important thing. Two thousand Muslims worked in these two houses. And in each of the houses - in one on the fortieth floor, in the other on some thirty - there was a mosque door. Could the fundamentalists send a plane to the mosque, commit such blasphemy? After all, this is probably worse than a Christian to defecate in church. This is absolutely impossible, and no fundamentalists could be behind this terrorist attack. The question always sounds like this: look who benefits, what happened as a result. The result was the occupation of Iraq and Afghanistan.

When the Taliban, terrible and evil, came to power in the small country of Afghanistan, the first thing they did was to introduce Sharia law. This is a certain system of legislation, according to which, for drug trafficking, the right hand is cut off the first time, the head is cut off the second time. Very soon, many one-armed people appeared in the northern provinces of Afghanistan, and drug trafficking was reduced by forty times. 97 percent, can you imagine? Could Americans put up with such a reduction in drug trafficking, and was it not worth it to blow up two houses in order to be able to occupy the country and stop Sharia law? Here's your reason. You can always see how the imperial system begins to fight with everyone who is outside of it.

Those who wish to be outside the imperial scheme have a choice. You can fight the system and lose, because the system is always stronger than the individual. And it is possible, formally occupying some place in the system, to remain, nevertheless, an internally free person.

Freedom, power, money give superiority - that's for sure. But the most important thing we need to figure out is what superiority is based on.

Mental construction: highlanders and plains

The terrain also leaves an imprint on the psyche of people.

There are mountains and there are plains. Highlanders live in the mountains, plains live on the plains. There are many fertile lands and pastures on the plains. It is only necessary to cultivate the land, and it will gratefully sprout. There are no such opportunities in the mountains, because there are few fertile lands. Therefore, the highlanders must periodically descend and rob the plains, otherwise they will not survive.

Moreover, due to high concentration ultraviolet in the mountains there is a demographic shift - there are twice as many men born there than on the plains. So, in order to remain normal men, the highlanders need to periodically go down and take women from the plains. And those can resent as much as they like, however, if they introduce a culture like unisex, they will resent less.

Consider what qualities are genetically cultivated in these two types of people.

Obedience, diligence, diligence, respect for laws are cultivated among the plains people. They are ordered to love each other, take care of each other and help each other in every possible way - the less fuss will be with them. The salvation of the drowning will be the work of the drowning themselves, and there is no point in wasting gasoline on boats. Here is the control mechanism.

Highlanders genetically cultivated aggression, strength, dashing, prowess. Excellence is cultivated.

I lived for some time in the mountains and I can say that life there, firstly, is by no means easy, secondly, it is restless and rather dangerous, and thirdly, it is subject to certain regulations that the plains do not have. After all, the plains tense up twice a year, while the highlanders have to strain all the time. Herds, work, people, home, family - the highlander is in constant, continuous tension. Whereas the plainsman can afford to relax and laze around.

The Plains fear and hate the Highlanders, the Highlanders despise the Plains.

The English are the inhabitants of the plains, and the Scots are the inhabitants of the mountains. If we analyze English jokes, we will see that the Scots in them do not shine with intelligence. On the contrary, they appear stupid, greedy and predatory. In Scottish anecdotes, the English do not look brave, but cowardly, downtrodden, crushed by life and weak.

We can take other parallels, for example, the Caucasus - Kuban or the Pamir Highlands - the Ferghana Valley - and we will see the same thing. The terrain creates certain conditions for the formation of a personality type, the mental structure of people.

Superiority vs Superiority

The traditional superiority and disregard for all other branches of the military is characteristic of the Airborne Forces. In the airborne troops, service is difficult, and probably the most dangerous one that can be. This service is subject to the most severe discipline, but the discipline there is not the same as in the rear units. Precisely because of different view on discipline, paratroopers look at all other troops as higher beings on lower ones.

In the rear, a fighter can easily fall asleep at the post. In a combat unit, this is impossible, and if it happens, it will end very sadly for him. The one who fell asleep will be beaten, along the way explaining to him how bad it is to sleep, because different people can sneak up inaudibly. bad people with a different eye shape and speaking a different language, and for the unit, everything can end very sadly.

In the rear, a soldier cannot, under any circumstances, call an officer by name. In a combat unit, during hostilities, this happens all the time. A soldier in a combat unit may have some kind of violation of the uniform, and in the rear part this is unthinkable. A combat officer can walk around in dirty boots, maybe be unshaven for a couple of days, a staff officer - in no case. From the point of view of a staff officer, a combat officer has no idea how exactly it is necessary to monitor the external appearance and how to behave with the high command. Both - both staff and combat - feel superior to each other, and this is a normal, very good phenomenon, it gives strength.

The border runs through the heart

To feel superior to other people, you need to feel that they are inferior to you.

There is a concept in Islam called "murabitun", people of ribat. Ribat is a border territory, border fortresses. Murabitun are border guards. In those times when Muslims were a formidable force, when they moved in all directions, when their empire stretched from China to Spain, fortresses guarding the lands of Muslims were called ribat, from where invasions into the lands of non-Muslims were prepared. The territory was divided into dar-ul-Islam - the land of Islam, and darul-harb - the land of war, and between them there was a border - ribat. So, according to one of the Islamic mystics, this border runs in the heart of every person.

The boundary between the mountain and the valley runs through the heart. There is no need to change your place of residence - superiority can be achieved only in your soul, in your psyche, in your consciousness.

One person runs in the morning, the second - hangover.

One does not smoke, the second clogs the air with tobacco smoke.

One does not drink alcohol, the second is in a non-binding state.

The first person will always treat the second, at least with irritation, but in general - with disgust and contempt. The first looks at the second as a lower being.

The one whose life is subject to regulations despises the one who talks. For example, cadets look at ordinary schoolchildren as inferior beings, because the life of a cadet, unlike the life of an ordinary schoolchild, is strictly regulated. The life of a nomad is also subject to regulations. The life of a gardener allows him to be loose.

So what can you do to feel superior? How to form required state your psyche?

Mechanisms for creating superiority

First: difficulties

There are several mechanisms to achieve excellence. First, excellence requires difficulty. One must create difficulties for oneself, submit oneself to these difficulties, make one's life more difficult than ordinary people.

My own concept is called "binding". It includes the following: I train in the gym, but in addition to all the workouts, I do three hundred push-ups every day, three hundred squats and three hundred ab exercises. No matter how I feel, how I spent my time, how much sleep I had that day - I have to do all these exercises.

Plus, I always carry with me and constantly use two things. The first is an expander. All free time I squeeze it - ten to fifty times with each hand. The second thing is balls that can be rotated in the hand and periodically squeezed with the palm of your hand. hard surface. This kneads the fingers, strengthens the hand, makes the palm hard. When you greet someone, you feel that the person’s hand is softer than yours.

All this is a “commitment”, and its goal is not only physical self-improvement, but also creating difficulties for yourself. Difficulties give a sense of superiority over those who do not have them.

Thus, the first task on the path to superiority is to create some kind of physical, bodily oriented, bodily perceived difficulties for oneself.

Second: danger

Second, dominance requires danger.

I love Friedrich Nietzsche's book Thus Spoke Zarathustra. I consider it one of my manifestos. There is a wonderful episode in this book: the rope dancer dies, and Zarathustra says to him: “You will die, you will die even before you die. your body. Your soul will die even before your body.” He asks: "Well, then I'm just an animal that was taught to walk a tightrope?" Zarathustra answers: “No, you have made a trade out of danger. And for that alone, you deserve respect in my eyes.” Consider the words: "You have made a trade for yourself out of danger."

There are areas of activity where people have to constantly take risks, for example, military affairs. The riot police take risks all the time, they are the first to take a hit on themselves, and they look at ordinary policemen like mice. Because, just like the dancer in Nietzsche's book, they made a trade out of danger.

Likewise, people who extreme views sports, look at ordinary people with superiority. There is such a simple sport - duffing, downhill from a height on ropes. It does not require any physical strength, it requires only composure. We descend from rocks, from rooftops, from bridges. When behind fifty meters of emptiness, and there is a descent along the rope, the world feels different. Moreover, having experienced danger, you begin to look with superiority at those who did not experience it.

A sense of superiority arises where a danger model is created. So, the second task is to find some kind of danger for yourself.

I have a good friend, he loves one entertainment. He, himself a teetotaler, rinses his mouth with vodka, sprinkles vodka on his clothes, and goes to the gambling hall somewhere on the criminal outskirts of St. Petersburg. There he takes out his wallet, drops a wad of money on the floor, staggers, picks up money, puts it in his wallet ... He plays several times, drops it again and collects money. Maybe when you order coffee, forget your wallet on the counter and pick it up only when you call him. Naturally, he is completely sober. When he leaves the hall, the local petty criminals are already sneaking after him. He goes into the darkest doorway, joyful petty criminals run after him, but instead of a man just swaying and emitting the aroma of alcohol, they see an absolutely sober man with a weapon in his hand. He has the richest collection of urban weapons - knives, brass knuckles, nunchucks, steel rods, telescopic batons, even a pair of pistols. It's hard to argue with a person who has a gun in his hand. He usually kicks these petty criminals in all parts of the body and explains to them that it is not good to rob, because it can end very badly, because you never know what awaits you in the near future. He gives a short lecture on the need to live honestly, and if dishonestly, then at least without committing violence against anyone. After that, he goes home happy and satisfied. Why is he doing this? First, he puts himself in danger. Secondly, it heals society, leads educational work. He considers himself a social orderly. He believes that this is his mission.

Third: regulation

Thirdly, for superiority, regulations are necessary, that is, a regime, ordering of life. The most regulated religion in the world is Judaism. The life of an adherent of Judaism is scheduled for every day and every hour. He knows what he should do, when what prayer to read, when what words to say, when what section of the Torah, oral or written, to study. Therefore, such a power and strength of the Jewish community is not surprising. The second most regulated religion is Islam. Whatever happens around - flood, earthquake, war - five times a day, a believing Muslim is obliged to perform a prayer - to say certain words in Arabic and create a certain number of bows, waist and earth. This is a regulation, this is a ritual.

Twenty years ago, three cadets from the same training unit were taking a survival test in the desert. The survival test is very interesting activity, by the name alone it is already clear how much fun it is. Morning in the desert. No one has water, one of the cadets splashes the last half a sip on his cheeks, smears them with cream, and carefully shaves his face with a razor. At this time, the second cadet hems the white collar to his uniform, and the third polishes his boots to a shine. Shoes will become dirty after a hundred steps through the desert. The collar will turn black after a thousand steps. A clean-shaven face, when no one needs a soul for a hundred and fifty kilometers around. Are these three cadets idiots? No.

The meaning of the regulation is that people cannot do without it. For one person, life is unthinkable without a clean-shaven face. For another, it is unthinkable to walk in dirty shoes. And if the shoes become dirty after a hundred steps, at the next halt he will take out a brush and scrub it again. The third one absolutely does not understand how it is possible not to hem a white collar onto a uniform. And when the collar becomes dirty after a thousand steps, he will tear it off and sew on a new one. These people live without stepping back from the rituals they have adopted.

When employees stand in the central office of the Toyota Motors corporation in the morning and sing the anthem “Glory to Toyota Motors”, and at that time the flag is raised, this is also a regulation. This is a ritual.

There once lived a cheerful guy in the world, his name was Ying Zheng. Starting his career as a simple ruler of the kingdom of Qin, he conquered six Chinese kingdoms and created a single centralized empire, becoming the founder of a new dynasty. In essence, Ying Zheng, aka Qin Shi Huang, created China as such.

When he came to power, he first of all gathered all humanists, dissidents, human rights activists - and drowned them in the Yangtze. There he sent all the writers and poets. After that, Qin Shi Huang burned all the books, with the exception of military, agricultural and industrial treatises - where it is written how to smelt metal, how to dry grains, how to conduct a military strategy. And he introduced a mandatory physical culture minimum for all officials - anyone wishing to take a public post was obliged to pull himself up ten times on the crossbar and run a kilometer in about four minutes. I don't know if members of any government can do the same. Members of the Russian government will definitely not be able to. If a person could not do this, he was beaten with sticks and betrayed to universal contempt.

Qin Shi Huang introduced repression in the form of corporal punishment. If an official was caught taking bribes, he was publicly flogged with sticks in the central square of the city, after which they announced that he was a bastard and a bribe-taker, and removed him from his post. If this were introduced in some civilized country, how would it affect the economy?

Taxes under Qin Shi Huang were taken only from men, there was no emancipation then. If a man had two sons, he was exempt from taxes for five years. If he had three sons, he was exempt from taxes for fifteen years. If he had four sons, he was exempt from taxes for life. Imagine how this could affect the demographic picture of the country.

As a result, during the reign of Qin Shi Huang, the territory of China increased three times, the population - ten times. There were resources - the sea, there was food - the sea, there was money - the sea, and there were people - the sea, and everyone had to be occupied with something. And Qin Shi Huang decided to start building the Great Wall of China. During his lifetime, it was rebuilt by three quarters. Behind this wall, the Chinese hid from the nomads for centuries.

Emperor Qin Shi Huang abolished the ministry in charge of culture and education, instead he introduced two others - the ministry physical development and the Ministry of Defense. He strengthened the vertical of power, introduced Physical punishment for officials and established a population policy. This emperor created regulations in the country.

Qin Shi Huang broke all Guinness records. He ruled the country for 75 years. At the age of ninety-five, he died, leaving a gigantic empire to his children. He was a genius and the Chinese consider him the father of the nation.

A person who wants to achieve superiority needs to introduce some kind of regulation, ritual for himself. At first it is perceived as a game, but later this game becomes the core of the psyche. You can enter morning exercises or regular workouts. You can enter the mode - get up and go to bed at the same time. The system of auto-suggestion, self-coding is also a regulation: before each meal - installation, after eating - installation, woke up in the morning - installation, went to bed in the evening - installation and so on. Rhythmic movements - squeezing the expander, sorting out the rosary - this is also a ritual, this is a setting for strength, for psychic power. It gives superiority and creates power.

The myth of personality

Highly important point is the myth of your personality.

You know that you are the best, but why? Yes, you have difficulties, but others also have difficulties. Your life is full of dangers, but maybe others have just as many dangers. You live by the rules, but many others also live by their rituals.

You need your own myth. A legend that explains why you are above all.

Atilla found a rusty piece of iron somewhere in the ground, convinced himself that it was nothing but the sword of the God of War, and with this sword of the God of War conquered half the world.

Temujin was firmly convinced that he was not the son of Erken-batyr, but Tengri, the God of Heaven himself, who came to his mother. The pitiful people who dared to expel the son of Tengri from the tribe paid the price ten years later, when the Son of Heaven became the great Genghis Khan.

Once upon a time, there lived another cheerful guy, his name was Alexander Filippych. He came up with the idea that he is none other than the son of Zeus. Not Philip, the ruler of a small Slavic region of Macedonia, not a groom (there was such a version due to a discrepancy with the timing of his birth - at a crucial moment, Philip was on a campaign), but Zeus himself.

These people created a myth for themselves, and the myth made them much stronger.

Myth-making is characteristic not only of people, but also of entire nations. One possessed man suddenly came up with the idea that the Germans have something to do with the Aryans. In fact, the Aryans are a completely different people, and the Slavs are much closer to it than the Germans. But he came up with it, and, like a real schizophrenic, he induced everyone with his idea. And when everyone believed it, the Third Reich arose. Under it was all of Europe and half of Africa, and it could still exist if it had not collided with the worldwide communist enclave.

Let's open the smart book Talmud. There is a lot to learn from those who read this book constantly - their success is quite impressive.

Before Moishe gave the commandments to the Jews on Mount Sinai, at first he arranged a tension, a march in full gear for forty years through the sands, besides, they had to cut themselves with nomads along the way. Those guys who came out of the desert were not at all the ones who left Egypt forty years before. And then Moishe gave them a theory. What was this theory? You are the chosen ones, and all the rest are not chosen, you are one people, God's people, and all the rest are from Satan. When people believed it, it became the truth for them. What did it give them? An Orthodox Jew looks at a representative of any other denomination as a lower being.

Something similar was done after one and a half - two thousand years, when another great man the world was clearly divided into two categories: the faithful and the unfaithful. The unfaithful for the faithful is nothing and no one. This determines how people relate to others and to themselves.

You can create for yourself any myth, any legend that you think up and believe in.

You are Neo, chosen as the Great Programmer who sits at the keyboard of the Universal Computer. This is my understanding of God.

You are a descendant of aliens, an ancient, wise and perfect race, superior to earthlings in everything.

You are the last Atlantean, a descendant of superhumans, with whom the current inhabitants of the Earth cannot be compared.

You are a descendant of a great hero of your choice. For example, Hercules, the great hero of Hellas. Or the eternal hero Erikese, created by Michael Moorcock, who comes into this world every time he is needed, and the rest of the time the angels keep him with them.

Your ancestors were Amazons, great warriors who caught men for procreation and made their daughters heirs.

Come up with a myth for yourself, read about the gods or heroes you have chosen and know that you are one of them.

The Parable of the Greens and the Blues

I will tell you, Friends, a parable of ancient times and distant lands. In a long, long time ago, people lived in a far, far away land. They were very different. Some wore green clothes. Other clothes are blue. And sometimes the Greens fought the Blues. Sometimes they traded. Sometimes they took their women as wives. However, they did not give their women to them.

This is how the Greens and Blues lived. Side by side, but not mingling.

The Greens weren't allowed to drink the cheerful drink "pig". But the Blues slurped "pig", behaved outrageously and wallowed in the cut.

The Greens could not live in the mud and had to wash and clean their clothes five times a day. And Dove didn't care. They often walked, slept and lived in the mud. And the Blue Sacred Animals (the Blue ones have such) - for a long time washing was considered a sin.

The Greens had their own Smart Book. The Blues have their own.

The Greens had to wear a beard. The Blues shaved their faces and wore long hair, so that their men could be mistaken for women. And they often confused, but that's not the point.

The Greens wore knives on their belts. It was an element of national green clothing. But the Blue Knives weren't allowed to be worn. Suddenly they will cut themselves or, God forbid, they will cut the sacred animals! They were given weapons only when they had to go to war with the Greens.

And their women were very different. The Greens wore headscarves and modest clothes, while the Blues ran around with half-naked busts and asses ...

The Greens wives were faithful to their husbands, and the Blues, who preferred women, walked with branched horns, like maral deer. And their wives turned to their husbands not “My Lord”, but “Hey, Pig!” (in the sense of drunk pigs).

And another difference was their life...

The Greens could have several wives, but not a single mistress. And Blue - one wife.

They often had one too many. And the coolest Blue men had one wife, from whom they wandered to mistresses, whores or prostitutes.

* * *

But there were smart people who translated Smart Books of the Greens and Blues.

People compared and saw: “Yes, Green color- this is great!"

The Green Book ordered to have dignity and bow before the Creator, and the Blue Book recommended to obey any power, worship sacred animals, slurp a pig. And forget about dignity.

People compared when it became possible to compare. It's cool not to drink, not to smoke, go in for sports, make love with your wives and raise children. And many began to take off their Blue clothes and put on the Green ones. Grow beards.

The pig manufacturers were the first to sound the alarm - well, the Greens do not want to sip it in any. That is, they slurp, of course, but the Greens themselves condemn them and consider them to be shit. And then the sacred animals joined them. And they decided to fight the Greens.

The Greens did not call anyone to them, but they were friendly to everyone who changed into green clothes and immediately called them “Brother” and “Sister” - this was the custom among the Greens.

Everyone who saw the meanness, deceit, stupidity and heartlessness of the Blue elite, the sacred animals and the pig producers who rule over all, compared them with the Greens, and the comparison was in favor of the Greens.

Those who were smarter read the Smart Books, comments on them and chose the Smart Book of the Greens.

Those who saw how the Greens live, how they communicate with each other, how they are not afraid of death, having overcome the Blue fear, changed into green clothes.

All this pissed off the sacred animals, pig producers and traders, and anyone who liked the Blue Clothes.

And they came up with "international banditry." And he took the coolest Blues, dressed in Green clothes and they blew up two Blue towers.

And all pig producers and all sacred animals began to scare everyone with green.

And they came with the war to the Greens and accused the Greens of all the nasty things of this world.

1. That all Greens are bandits.

2. That all Blue women who are married to Greens are deeply unhappy. And the timid words of the Blue Women in headscarves that, on the contrary, they are happy, were drowned in the cries of pig dealers and sacred animals.

3. That all Greens will burn in fire after death.

4. The fact that all the Greens are savages and cut sheep with knives that are worn on their belts.

5. That the Green Book is suitable only for those who are hereditary bearers of Green clothes.

And the removal of the Blue clothes is a betrayal of the ancestors. Which, by the way, were clothed in blue clothes by force, having destroyed half.

6. That freedom is the ability to eat a pig and copulate with men, women, children and animals.

At the same time, having slandered the Greens, they began to prohibit comments on the Green Book (as on bandit literature). Because the Holy Book itself is oh so difficult to understand without comments.

And they began to provoke conflicts between the Blues and the Greens. And they began to replace Blue patriotism with hatred for the Greens. So that, God forbid, the Blues would not undertake to cut pig producers or sacred animals, or their servants from zomboyaschikov.

And they began to diligently make enemies of the Greens ...

They took advantage of the strife between the Greens and set some Greens against others. And the Greens, forgetting what the Smart Book teaches them, began to fight with each other.

How the confrontation between the Greens and the Blues ended is unknown. Memory and chronicles did not preserve the events of those long, long years in those far, far away lands.

Or maybe let's fantasize?

* * *

May they all never be green!

Green is a worker. Green is a warrior. Green is a merchant.

There will always be those who will slurp the pig. There will always be those who want to live in the dirt. There will always be those who, due to stupidity, thoughtlessness and servility, will worship sacred animals.

And the rulers, hand in hand with the sacred animals, will defame the Greens and promote the Blue. And talk about the benefits of moderate pig consumption. And that slurping a pig is very patriotic. Because it is a wonderful national tradition.

And change a Blue into a Green robe or take a renegade from the Greens to make him faithful dog sacred animals. To repel everyone from Zeleny with his vile appearance, vile speeches and deeds.

And one sacred animal appeared, despite everything, retaining decency. And it founded the Blue Temperance movement. But other sacred animals stripped him of his priesthood, and he became just an animal.

And the next day, pig producers were honored in the Blue Fortress. And they were awarded the medal of the sacred Amur goat and the order of the sacred Mississippian ram.

* * *

But one day people from among the Blues appeared. Only they were dressed strangely. Jackets are green, beards, and trousers and shirts (oh, horror!) BLACK!

They don't slurp a pig, they look at sacred animals like they're shit. On the Blues - with pity and contempt. The Greens are called "Brother" and "Sister", but do not mix with them. They also have several wives. But they don't have mistresses.

And the Greens looked at them warily at first, until they saw that these people were behaving like the best of the Greens. And the Blues, too, having overcome their fear of the green jacket, began to notice their strength, resilience, decency and success. And only sacred animals, pig dealers and their servants from zombies were already choking with hatred for them.

Only these, in black shirts, did not care at all. Zomboyaschik they did not watch. They didn’t drink a pig, they didn’t use mistresses, as well as available women.

And they were everywhere. And it was easy to recognize them, and they always came to the aid of each other, then other Greens, and then the rest.

* * *

Blacks in green jackets can live either by the laws of the Greens or by the laws of the Blues.

If they live by the laws of the Greens, they have a chance to become the head of the Greens of the whole world! If they go back to the Blues, the Blues will merge them.

Or - the truth, life is green, albeit in a black interpretation. Or pig, zomboyaschik and dirt.

And if you walked around with a stone ax and saw someone with a gun, take it and go with a gun. And leave the stone ax blunt and inert.

But, Dear friends, no analogy!

It's just a fairy tale of ancient times!

50 main psychological traps and ways to avoid them Medyankin Nikolay

What prevents us from feeling superior?

All people are equal, there is no one who would be higher or lower than others. Therefore, both the inferiority complex and the superiority complex are only a subjective perception of oneself by a person, and in fact self-deception.

A person with a superiority complex essentially feels just as insecure as a person with an inferiority complex. But if someone who is sure that he is the worst usually suffers quietly and executes himself, then a person with a superiority complex is looking for ways to feel confident. To do this, he tries to suppress others with his imaginary superiority. After all, he feels good only when there is someone nearby who can be humiliated, who can be laughed at, who can be subdued. He would feel best if everyone looked up to him and were obedient. But these dreams are impossible. Because most people do not accept the role of obedient, weak, subordinate puppets, which can be commanded as you like.

A person with a superiority complex essentially wants to fit reality to himself - to make people the way he would like them to be. And if people do not obey, he loses his temper. As a result, a real neurosis arises in him due to the constant contradiction between the desired and the actual. A person gets angry if someone does not want to recognize his greatness, superiority, special significance. At heart, he is unhappy, because he is too dependent on others and on whether he has power over them.

A person possessed by an extreme superiority complex can become socially dangerous. This happens if he fails to assert himself in his superiority in socially acceptable ways. The most serious crimes are sometimes committed in order to feel their imaginary superiority and power over other people.

But the most important thing is that the superiority is just imaginary. This means that a person does not become happier because he considers himself superior to others. In the depths of his soul, he still remains a flawed, unhappy creature, unable to love either himself or others. In fact, he does not really live - but only fights all his life for the illusion of his greatness. As a result, his strength and Vital energy are wasted.

He does not achieve creative goals and can come to a complete collapse and loss of the meaning of life!

Exercise 1.

Realize your true value

Maybe you are afraid to throw off the mask of superiority, because you feel that in this case you will have to face your true self, and you will feel weak, miserable and flawed without this mask? Tell yourself that you have nothing to fear. You have a strong personality inside you, which is valuable in itself, without any masks.

Imagine that there is someone who loves you with unconditional love, just the way you are, without any masks, loves both strong and weak. Imagine that you feel the gaze of his loving and all-forgiving eyes on you. You can imagine, for example, that this is how an ideal mother looks at you - the most loving and kind in the world. But in fact, you will meet in this way with the most loving, kind and forgiving part of yourself.

Say to yourself, on behalf of that loving part of you, “I have value in my own right. This value is absolute, it does not depend on anything. No circumstances, no words and actions of other people can destroy my true value. I allow myself to be everyone - both strong and weak. I accept myself as everyone. I love and appreciate myself in every way. I free myself from the need to wear masks. I recognize my worth as I am."

Exercise 2.

Praise from the heart

Start appreciating both your own virtues and the virtues of other people. If you did not notice the positive qualities and good deeds other people - make it your goal to start noticing it. If you suffer from a superiority complex, then the achievements and virtues of other people can make you feel something like jealousy. Do you think that if you recognize the merits of another, it will humiliate you? But it's not like that at all!

You can recognize and appreciate both your own merits and the merits of others. Tell yourself: “No one is worse or better. All men are equal, and all are equally deserving of praise for their merits and merit. I deserve praise - and other people deserve praise. We are equal. From now on, I communicate on an equal footing with people. I respect myself, I respect others. I value myself, I value others."

Find something to praise yourself for. If you are used to feeling superior to others, you will have no problem with this. And then - complicate your task: find something to praise the other for, and praise him! Set yourself the following goal: after each praise to yourself, be sure to praise the other. So that the number of praises to oneself was equal to the number of praises to someone else. For example, you might decide that you praise yourself five times a day and someone else five times. Do this every day. The number of praises can be changed, the main thing is to maintain a balance: as much as oneself - so much for others, no more and no less.

You will see how your mood will begin to change for the better, and relationships with people will noticeably improve.

Exercise 3

Being strong means not being afraid of your weaknesses

If you consider yourself stronger than others, but at the same time do not admit your mistakes and weaknesses, your strength is imaginary, ostentatious. A truly strong person is never afraid to admit that he was wrong, he was wrong. Not afraid to apologize, ask for forgiveness. There is no shame in making mistakes, everyone makes them. It's a shame not to want to correct mistakes. If you made a mistake, admitted it and decided to correct it, this will not humiliate you in the least. Learn to admit mistakes with dignity. Learn to acknowledge your weaknesses and failures. This will only give you strength and give an incentive for subsequent victories.

Take paper, a pen, and promise yourself that you will be as honest with yourself as possible. After all, no one will know about what you will write now - this is not necessary for anyone except you.

Continue with the following phrases:

What I don't like about myself is that I...

There is one thing that I don't do as well as I would like, and that is...

It happens that I am scolded and criticized for ...

I remember most of all the following my failures: ...

The qualities that I don't have, but that I would like to have, are...

My harmful unwanted habits- this is …

Take your time, think about what you write. Then re-read and think: which of the shortcomings, mistakes and failures you have listed are real, and which ones are imaginary? Maybe someone inspired you that you have these shortcomings (or maybe you inspired it yourself)? Maybe you exaggerate your failures and weaknesses? Do they seem to you a tragedy, something to be hidden from others, when in fact it is a trifle, and many other people also have the same flaw or make the same mistakes?

Read over the list of your shortcomings again, and after each say out loud: “I accept this in myself. I don't blame myself for this. I forgive myself for this. I am a good person, I recognize my true worth, which does not depend on anything.

Then be sure to make a list of your strengths. This can be done by continuing the following phrases:

What I like about myself is that I...

There is something that I do very well, better than other people, and that is...

I am praised for...

I remember most of all the following my successes, victories and achievements: ...

I have the following positive qualities: ...

My dears, good habits- this is …

Re-read and say to yourself: “I have both advantages and disadvantages, like all people. I accept both. I am the same person as everyone else - no worse and no better. I have exactly the same rights to live and be myself as all other people.

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PRIDE

AURA COLOR

Orange color- PRIDE - exaggerated confidence in one's own outstanding abilities and perfection, in contempt for the vices of other people.

You take yourself too seriously," don Juan said slowly, "and you treat yourself like a damn important person. This needs to be changed! After all, you are so important that you think you have the right to be annoyed for any reason. So important that you can afford to turn around and walk away when things don't turn out the way you want them to. Perhaps you think that by doing so you demonstrate the strength of your character. But this is nonsense! You are a weak, swaggering and narcissistic type!
I tried to protest, but don Juan would not let me. He said that because of the exorbitant feeling own importance I have never completed a single task in my entire life. I was amazed at the confidence with which he speaks. But all his words, of course, fully corresponded to the truth, and this not only angered me, but also scared me a lot.
"Self-importance, like personal history, is something to get rid of," he said weightily.
K. Castaneda. Journey to Ixtlan.

In Christianity, pride is one of the deadly sins. And I must say, not without reason. It is pride, a sense of self-importance, that is the cause of suffering and illness, often incurable, as well as death.

It is pride that is the source of all harmful thoughts and emotions. After all, when a person puts himself above someone else, he begins to condemn, despise, hate, get annoyed, make claims. The feeling of one's own superiority over others gives rise to arrogance and a desire to humiliate (by word, thought, deed).
A sense of self-importance generates a huge subconscious aggression, which then turns against the author himself.
This feeling means a person's desire to put himself, his mind, his wisdom above the Universe, God, above anything or anyone in this world. A proud person cannot and does not want to accept traumatic situations in his life, that is, those situations that do not meet his expectations. He has his own understanding of the world around him, and he believes that it is precisely this that is the most faithful and the best. He seeks to subdue the world often through violence. Therefore, any inconsistency with his ideas about how the world around him should be causes a surge of aggressive emotions in his soul: anger, resentment, hatred, contempt, envy, etc. And this, in turn, leads to various diseases and death.

Pride It is a feeling of inner superiority over others. This is primarily the result of a lack of understanding of one's true place in the Universe, one's purpose in this life, a lack of awareness of the purpose and meaning of life.
It turns out that all the energy is spent on direct or indirect proof of one's innocence, on the fight against the outside world. Imagine that the cell begins to fight with the whole organism and defend its own interests, regardless of the interests of the whole organism.
Does the body need such a cell?
Can a cell dictate its conditions to an organism?
No.
The body will strive to get rid of it, otherwise such a cell will turn into a cancer cell.

There are wonderful lines in the Bible about pride:
"Pride will come, shame will come, but with the humble - wisdom."
"Pride goes before destruction, and haughtiness before a fall."
"It is better to be humble in spirit with the meek than to share the booty with the proud."
"Before a fall, the heart of a man is lifted up, but humility precedes glory."
"Pride of the eyes and haughtiness of the heart, which distinguishes the ungodly, is sin."
"Humility is followed by the fear of the Lord, riches and glory and life."
"The pride of a man humiliates him, but the humble in spirit gains honor."

THE MOST CHARACTERISTIC SIGNS OF arrogance:
1. Pride, first of all, is manifested by a sense of one's own infallibility and the rightness and wrongness of others. Such people feel that they are always right, tend to criticize someone, discuss, gossip and blame.
2. The next manifestation of pride is self-pity.
Self-importance is self-pity in disguise. Such a person is focused only on himself, he begins to play the role of a victim, composure, sobriety and balance leave his life.
3. Attitude down, condescension.
A person feels superior to others, therefore, he considers all people below him.
4. Patronizing attitude towards someone.
Such a manifestation of pride is next to condescension. Usually these people help someone, after which they demand gratitude and respect. From such people you can hear: “You should be grateful to me for that. What have I done for you!
5. Humiliation of others and yourself.
There are people who consider themselves failures, incapable of anything, low in spirit, and if they see someone higher than themselves, they are ready to crawl in front of them on their knees. But at the same time, if they notice people below them, they force them to behave in the same way.
6. A manifestation of self-importance is the opinion that "without me the world cannot exist."
Such people think that everything depends on them, everything rests on them: the world, work, family. There exists a fine line between a sense of responsibility and self-importance.
7. Too serious attitude to yourself.
One gets the feeling that he is a very important person. And this feeling gives him a reason to be annoyed with or without. And when something in life does not turn out the way you want, he can get up and leave. This situation can often be seen in families with a divorce. Each of the spouses believes that by doing so he shows the strength of his character, but this is not so. Thus, on the contrary, they show weakness.
8. Excessive importance, in turn, gives rise to another problem - a person begins to focus on what others think and say about him. He is fixated on his problems and constantly talks about them, he shows narcissism and narcissism.
9. Boasting.
Feeling of superiority over others. A person begins to praise his virtues. And he does this because he has an inferiority complex, and he just needs to get the approval of others, to feel his importance.
10. Refusal to help.
A proud person does not allow other people to help him. And why? Because he wants to get all the fruits himself, he is afraid that he will have to share with someone.
11. The desire to gain fame, respect and honor, to rise.
People attribute to themselves the merits and works of other people. But they also have a tendency to make idols out of people.
12. The idea that the activity in which a person is engaged is more necessary and more important than all the others.
13. Rivalry.
The desire to do badly hurts the opponent. Any competition leads to tension, causes aggression, a subconscious desire to humiliate the opponent, which ultimately leads to breakdowns and illnesses.
14. The desire to condemn people for their mistakes, deeds and actions.
Such a person consciously looks for flaws in people, mentally punishes them, all this is done with a feeling of anger, irritation and hatred. Sometimes you even want to teach a man a lesson.
15. Using words that other people don't understand.
Scientists usually suffer from this defect.
16. Unwillingness to share their knowledge.
17. Unwillingness to thank and forgive. Touchiness.
18. Dishonesty to yourself and to other people.
Such a person may not fulfill his promises, deliberately mislead people, lie.
19. Sarcasm.
The desire to be sarcastic, to play a trick on a person, to offend with a caustic remark or rudeness.
20. Unwillingness to admit that you have shortcomings - spiritual problems and pride.

How to get rid of this harmful feeling?

Every human behavior has a positive intention. Pride, as a way of thinking and perceiving the world around us, also has a positive intention. It is multifaceted. This is the desire for excellence, and the desire to feel calm and comfortable, and the desire to declare oneself to the whole world.

Every person wants to feel that he lives in this world not in vain, that there is some meaning in his life. But to feel one's value and exclusivity at the expense of rising above others - this means to bear in the subconscious a program for the destruction of other worlds. After all, if I am better and higher, then others are worse and lower.
But in fact, on a subtle level, we are all equal.

Pride gives rise to the highest subconscious aggression, which returns with a powerful program of self-destruction in the form of injuries, accidents, incurable diseases and, finally, death.

It is important to realize that there are no people good or bad, better or worse. There are just people, and we make them what we expect to see. The higher a man exalts himself, the lower he will fall. The better he wants to look for others, the worse they will say about him.

Proud man - closed person. Not wanting to accept the world of another person, he makes his world poor and miserable. And eventually it leads to loneliness.
Many diseases arise from pride and how important it is to get rid of this feeling.

Make a program for liberation from pride. To do this, first of all, learn to take responsibility for your life, for your destiny. Immediately there will be no need to blame someone and yourself as well. Learn to accept any situation in your life - without complaints and resentment. And not just accept, but thank God, your subconscious mind for these events, no matter how negative they may seem at first glance.

Everyone knows the saying: "All that God gives is for the better." Try to find the positive in every situation. Sometimes they are obvious, sometimes they are hidden from our consciousness, and often the understanding of what positive lesson we have learned from it comes later.

What is acceptance? This is a deep understanding that we live in a very harmonious and fair world, and everything that happens to us in life must be accepted unconditionally, without pretensions and resentment. Whatever situation happens to you, accept it as given by God. Walk through it calmly.
Stop your thoughts and think - how did you create it?
Put into practice the laws that you already know about:
"External reflects internal" and "Like attracts like."

What important and positive lesson should you learn from this situation?
Learning to accept the situation is an art.
In Christianity, this is called humility. " Hit on one cheek - turn the other ".
Many simply do not understand the meaning of this phrase. Many people cannot accept it because they take it literally, not seeing the hidden meaning in it.
It means: on the external, on a conscious level, one can express disagreement with the situation and strive to change it, but on the internal, on subconscious level, that is, with the soul, this situation must be accepted without pretensions and resentment.
"Don't say, 'I will repay evil'; leave it to the Lord, and he will keep you."
Our consciousness is in the role of an observer and appraiser of those life events that our subconscious mind presents to us. Therefore, consciously you can express dissatisfaction, but subconsciously the situation must be accepted.

We ourselves create all the events of our life. The external can only be changed when we change something within ourselves. Learn to accept people for who they are. . Remember that each person lives in his own world and creates his own unique world. This is what determines the exclusivity and uniqueness of each human being.
Imagine human body. It has trillions of different cells. What brings them together? Life! Striving for the whole, that is, serving a single organism. At this level, all cells are equal to each other. No cells are better or worse. A cell of the heart or brain is no better than a cell of the rectum. They cannot exist without each other. Any organism is a deeply balanced system. All cells are interconnected. But at the same time, each cell is unique in its own way, as it performs its own specific functions for the benefit of the whole organism. And if the cell perfectly copes with its duties, then it receives everything that it needs from the body.

At a subtle subconscious level, each person is a particle of the Universe. And not only a person, but any creature, any subject. And here we are all equal. Everything in this world is united by one common goal- striving for the Whole, that is, for God, the Universe, the Higher Mind. And each makes his own unique contribution to the overall universal process of development. We are all going in the same direction, but each in our own way.
It is very important for a person to feel his value, importance and uniqueness in this world, but not by rising above others because each person and object is important in his own way, but by realizing his uniqueness in a single organism of the Universe.
Everyone goes his own way. And everyone has the same goal. Everyone, in the end, comes to what he was looking for. Searched intuitively, subconsciously, passing through certain life lessons. And the only thing that a person always has with him on this path and with which he ends his path is his personal life story, fate.
If people could learn to accept everything without aggression life situations and perceive events as lessons, not as stresses, learn from them, that is, draw positive conclusions in any situation, then life would be beautiful.

Sit back, relax, calm down. Stop your mind, internal dialogue. Mentally place an even luminous field of light blue in front of your eyes. Now imagine that such a light blue light fills you from the inside, gradually becoming brighter and lighter. And at this moment, mentally turn to the Higher Power, God. It doesn't matter if you believe in God or in the Cosmic Mind, any idea of ​​the intelligent beginning of the Universe is sufficient for such an appeal. Turn to these Higher Powers with an unusual request. Do not ask for any benefits for yourself, even if not material, but spiritual. Just ask this power to enter you, guide you, do with you what is harmonious for the Universe. Ask for one thing - to help you find that one place in the harmony of the Universe that is intended for you. Become exactly the way you best fit into the system of the World. Achieve that perfection, peace and tranquility that will allow you to know true happiness and freedom.
If at the time of such a prayer or immediately after it you want to move or sit in some unusual position, or maybe just walk around, breathing in a special way, or even dance - do not resist. It is a continuation of your meditation, a dynamic part of it. The universe can respond to your willingness to cooperate through your body.

People who practiced such meditations quite often, according to experts, can exactly copy the exercises and elements of various gymnastics systems, breathing exercises- everything that was found was human wisdom over long centuries of searching for the perfection of the spirit through the perfection of the body.
In the Bible, in the New Testament, there is such a prayer that neutralizes pride in the best way - this is " Our Father ".
Read it every day, but do not read thoughtlessly, but strive to understand its meaning.

Our Father, Who art in Heaven! May your name be hallowed;
May your kingdom come; Thy will be done, as in heaven and on earth.
Give us our daily bread today;
And forgive us our debts, as we forgive our debtors;
Lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from the evil one;
for yours is the kingdom and the power and the glory forever.
Amen.

There is another side to pride that often goes unnoticed, even for religious leaders. After all, pride is not only an arrogant attitude towards the surrounding world, which gives rise to aggression directed outward, but it is also a humiliation of oneself, an incorrect attitude towards oneself, which also gives rise to aggression. Various religious schools teach right attitude to other people, to the surrounding world, but pay little attention to the correct attitude towards oneself. Much of their teaching is based on guilt, fear, and punishment for sin. They teach to love God, the First Cause of all things, and love for God begins with love for oneself, as a particle of God. After all, God is in the soul of each of us. And if a person, for example, scolds himself for some action, then he scolds God, and this is already a manifestation of pride. Therefore, to comprehend the world around and universal laws you need to change your attitude towards yourself, and through self-change and self-improvement - to the world around you.
"I don't want to be proud like a gem"

The awakened one does not have that arrogance that the ordinary person considers his right, because the awakened one is not only extremely modest, but also does not show the respect for the mind that is characteristic of the ordinary person. Thus, he is much more intelligent than the average person, since to believe that the mind fully justifies the need to avoid challenges in life is to behave completely unreasonably. The Awakened One only uses his mind to guide him to experience life in its entirety, not as an excuse to run away from challenges.
There is a huge difference between arrogance and humility. Arrogance is based on the assumption that a person is superior to someone or something. Humility is based on the knowledge that a person is not higher or more important than anything else.

Unlike the average person, the awakened one knows that he is no more or less important than anything else. This is known to him by the fact that he lives. The priceless gift of life with which he is endowed is the very life force that is awarded to the king, the beggar and the insect. Such knowledge is extremely sobering, and only a vain fool would not humble himself by contemplating this fact. The awakened one is not arrogant, in his humility he experiences deep respect to all living things, no matter what kind of life it is - his own, the life of a king or a beggar, an animal or a plant, an insect or an atom.

People often confuse humility with arrogance and therefore have no real respect for life.
Cm.

FLATTERY

Flattery is praise for a selfish purpose. Feigned approval, sly obsequiousness.
A flattering person is ready to raise another to any heights, just to get something from him, whether it be material gain or attention, approval.
A flattering person destroys himself and the world around him. After all, by raising someone, he lowers himself.
There is flattery, as one of the derivatives of pride.
Probably, everyone who communicated with such people felt unpleasant feelings.
These discomfort appear because flattery carries a charge of subconscious aggression. No wonder they used to say that they take out the soul with flattery.
A self-sufficient person strives to express his individuality in this world; a person who respects himself is free from flattery.

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