I want to divorce my husband, but I can't make up my mind. "All went to work." How to know when it's time to divorce your once beloved wife

12.04.2019

Dear readers, you will be interested in this article if you have a desire "I want to divorce my wife." You will find out what reasons most often provoke men to such thoughts. You will learn why wives might not agree to a divorce. Learn how to act if there is a joint child.

Contrived reasons

The desire to divorce is not always justified. Often, the reason can be frivolous, and the solution to the problem is available without parting.

The opinion that the spouse has changed and is no longer the one you married. In fact, the girl remained the same, the period just ended elevated hormones, strong feeling love abated. Your task is to try to get to know her again, to learn to live with the way she is. Do not forget that you too could have changed in her eyes. Therefore, the grinding stage must be reciprocal.
She does not obey my demands! The fact is that now is not the time when a man's word was law. Women today have the same rights as males. If your spouse is a careerist, independent woman, then you should not turn her into a forced housewife. There is no need to try to remake your wife for yourself, you are already adults with mature personalities. It was necessary to look before marriage.
She has solid flaws. When choosing a life partner, we are looking for people who match us. Most likely, the number of her shortcomings is equal to yours. And dissatisfaction with her, in fact, is a manifestation of the fact that you are dissatisfied with yourself.
She is to blame for everything. This is a misconception. Both spouses should create coziness and comfort in the family. In addition, both are to blame for any conflict.

Frequent occasions

There are different reasons for divorcing your wife. Some of them are insignificant, after thinking everything over, you can fix everything, others are very serious - divorce is the only way out.

Got the monotony and quiet quiet life... Here you need to analyze yourself and the whole situation as a whole. You may not have enough adrenaline, but why divorce right away? Climb the mountain, make a parachute jump. After all, no one forces you to sit at home and do nothing. In addition, boredom is not necessarily dictated by the presence of a particular woman next to you. After all, it may easily turn out that, in fact, you have lost the true purpose of your life or you are too lazy to strive for something. Perhaps you just need to reconsider your ideals in life and take care of yourself.
The wife is constantly nagging, unhappy with everything, humiliating and insulting. There are three options to consider here. In the first - you good wifebut she also deserves to be dissatisfied with something. And in this case, you just need to listen to her requirements. The second option - she endlessly humiliates, this is the type of women who cannot live without gnawing on their husband. At the same time, some men strive to become better all the time so that their spouse does not reproach them, thus achieving many successes. But, if your changes aren't enough, she may just need someone else. The third option is that the man himself provokes scandals. This most often happens if he no longer has feelings, there is a desire to start a relationship with another woman, but he is tormented by a feeling of guilt.
Treason. Perhaps you have such a nature, you are not able to remain faithful to one woman, from time to time you go to the side, but at the same time you continue to love your spouse and do not want to part with her. If you are caught hot, you need to rehabilitate yourself, say that you love your wife very much, and this will never happen again. The second case is when everything is fine in the family, but suddenly a woman appears who drives you crazy. And then a difficult choice arises. If she is cheating, you can forgive if you love her a lot. If he himself has been looking for a reason for divorce for a long time, then this is a suitable case.
The wife tortured me with constant bouts of jealousy. Perhaps she is not confident in herself or is afraid of losing you. It is possible that the fear is due to the fact that you were previously seen in infidelity. But sometimes jealousy becomes pathological. And here you cannot do without the help of a psychologist, but there is no need to immediately get a divorce.

How to behave

First, you need to be fully convinced of the correctness of your decision. Consider the reasons you want to do this. Make sure nothing can be changed.
Perhaps it will not be superfluous to go for a consultation with a psychologist. If you consider this a waste of time, then you can immediately contact a divorce specialist. He will tell you how to behave correctly, what to say to your wife.
Please select right place to talk to your spouse. It is unacceptable to talk in front of children, in the presence of colleagues, friends or relatives. It will be better if the conversation takes place in an area where the wife will feel relaxed.
Be confident in your desire, speak directly about the fact that you want to get a divorce. No need to enter from afar.
If your spouse asks for another chance, do not agree if your decision was final. You shouldn't be weak.
Make sure that the conversation goes without yelling and insults. Stay polite, calm, and level-headed.

Why is the spouse against

It is extremely rare for a wife to immediately agree to a divorce. Agrees in cases when she herself thought about it. Let's take a look at the reasons a woman might be forced to fight for her marriage.

If there is a child, there is a desire to save the family, not to leave him without a father. The fear that it will not be possible to find an adequate replacement, to find a man who can treat the baby like a family. It is possible that the woman herself grew up without a father, and does not want this for her child either.
Doesn't want to be alone. She is afraid that no one will pay attention to her, especially if there is a child.
Holds on to material goods... Especially if you own or maintain an apartment.
Doesn't want to get divorced status. Afraid of the condemnation of relatives, the ridicule of friends. The fear arises that new spouse will not be the same as the previous one. Doesn't want her boyfriend to treat her like light woman availability due to the fact that she was already married.
The woman really loves you very much and does not see the point in life without your presence.

If there is a child

For many men, having children interferes with the desire to leave the family. They continue to endure, to make concessions - all for the sake of not hurting the baby. Therefore, you need to repeatedly consider your decision whether to get a divorce. But you need to understand that a family that exists only for the sake of common child, cannot be considered normal. In such cases, it is possible that the psychological trauma will be more severe if the parents stay together and not divorce.

Keeping a marriage alive can lead to constant quarrels in your family and an unhealthy environment.

What can be fraught with the child's preservation of the family for his sake:

The kid can grow closed or, on the contrary, aggressive.
It is possible that difficulties arise in meeting new children, with persons of the opposite sex. An early search for love is not excluded.
Misconceptions about relationships, family and love in general. A grown-up baby runs the risk of transferring a similar pattern of behavior to his family.
A child may try to find a person who will love him if the parents are busy with their problems, and she is not given up. And this can lead to the fact that a painful breakdown of relations will occur, because the search for feelings begins too early.
Lack of desire to develop, learn something new.
Inferiority complex, development of phobias.
Desire to live in a virtual world.
Self-hatred. Earlier obesity may be the cause.
In rare cases, suicidal tendencies.

Considering the above, you should be aware that the preservation of the marriage does not always have a better effect on the psyche of the child than its dissolution.

Doing the right thing

So that your separation is the least painful for the kids, it is necessary to talk to them before filing a divorce. Your task is to convince the children that:

they have nothing to do with the parents having to leave;
Your love for them will remain the same, there is no one dearer than them in the whole wide world;
You will continue to devote all your free time to them;
You will continue to help them financially.

In this situation, it is important that the divorce from his wife takes place amicably, without scandals and hatred. Otherwise, the spouse will start to turn the children against you, will forbid seeing them.

When everything was agreed

You made a decision, told your wife about it, she gives the go-ahead, what to do next?

Find out by visiting the registry office when you can apply for a divorce.
On the appropriate day, come with your spouse to submit an application.
Provide a photocopy of marriage certificate, passport and child's certificate, if available.
Fill out the required forms.
Wait a month, which is set aside so that the couple can change their minds about their decision.
Come on the appointed day to file a divorce.

Before communicating your intention, think about how the division of the acquired property will take place.
If the wife does not want to agree to a divorce, it is necessary to visit a lawyer. They will help solve this problem.
Only talk about divorce when you really intend to do so. You should not use this statement to scare your spouse into changing her behavior. Suddenly she really decides to divorce you.
Never involve children in your fights. Do not threaten your wife that you will take them away. Moreover, to blackmail her with this, in order to get a divorce.

Making such a fateful decision, you must think carefully about everything. Make sure that there is really no way to compromise and that the reason for the divorce is serious. Remember to think about how the children will feel, but you shouldn't stay with your wife just for their sake.

Hello dear ladies! How to understand that the relationship has come to an end? Sometimes this can be very difficult to do. The habit works, it's a pity to leave because of the long years lived together, children, common property... There are a million factors due to which women are afraid and do not rush to leave the family, although it is clear that there is nothing more to save. Let's try together to answer the question: when should you divorce your husband?

Eternal love

I always start analyzing relationships with the question: have you done everything so that your love will live forever? You can keep a marriage indefinitely if you are ready for the job.

Many couples are going through betrayal, difficult financial situations, parental opposition and other troubles and difficulties. It all depends on whether the person next to you is right.

I have a familiar couple who have been together for over ten years. They've been through so much difficult situationsthat I can't even count. But they are still together, holding hands more and more tightly and going forward. They love each other, they are ready to do anything for each other. Such a story from fairy talethat suddenly burst into life.

There are other examples as well. When couples could not stand even the slightest obstacle. It all depends only on you and your partner. Make sure of this by reading the article "". In it, I describe in detail the specifics of working on relationships.

But fate does not always bring us together with the one and only. For fear of being left alone, the young ladies cling to this man as if they were theirs. the last chance... But in the end it will not lead to anything good. Without love, without support, without and trusting relationships won't last long.

Feel like your feelings have cooled down and do not know what to do? Check out the article “ ».

Basic excuses for divorce

Each couple is special and faces their own unique problems, but in general, the reasons for divorce always find similarities among themselves. Let's discuss the most common ones and try to understand whether it is possible to save a family or whether it is worth packing up a suitcase and leaving.

Alcohol. One of the most common reasons why women leave men. And in my opinion, there is nothing to put up with here. The alcoholic in the family is a real misfortune. Of course, there are different alcoholics, quiet and calm, who get drunk and go to bed. But there are aggressive ones who beat their pets.

It is almost impossible to treat a man at home. This should be done by specialists. If you managed to talk to your spouse, he realized that he has problems and is ready for treatment, then you can still talk about saving the marriage. But if he refuses to accept his problems, does not understand what your complaint is, everything suits him, then it will be useless to fight him.

Quite often, I meet couples in which the husband and wife are drawn into this together at all. an amusing trip... Think about yourself, about your health. Sometimes it just starts with a couple of bottles of beer in the evening after work. But before you notice it is already a permanent bottle of cognac, hidden in the closet. Be carefull. I do not urge you not to drink at all. It is important to have a sound idea, to be able to stop.

Money. Another common reason for divorce. Bad living conditions, unwillingness of the spouse to work. But here it is very important to understand in what situations you need to help the faithful cope with the current circumstances, and when it is really time to leave.

If your husband has just been laid off from a good position, give him some time to recover. Help to look for a job, do not cut it once again... Now he needs support. But if he has been sitting for a year, two or three and is still trying to find a job, then let doubts creep into your head. Is he really looking for her?

I bring to your attention the article "". In it, I consider in detail various optionswhy men prefer to stay at home and how to deal with it.

But if this happens with enviable regularity, I'm afraid you can't do anything with such a man. After all, some even have a second family. There is no test that would help initially determine whether your faithful will run to the left or not. You will understand this only after living with him for several years.

How to understand that a man is cheating? Signs can be different. He stays late at work, hides the phone, leaves the room when they call him. Just don't panic ahead of time. Sometimes women see something that is not really there. You shouldn't make a scandal if you are not sure about cheating.

Different tempers. This can include different goals in life, lifestyle, plans and dreams, incompatibility in bed, the desire to have a child, and so on. At the beginning of a relationship, euphoria closes our eyes and we do not see strong differences that can then interfere with the relationship.

What is family? These are two people who together strive for common happiness. And when you have different understandings of happiness, you cannot go to it together.

Recently, a client of mine broke up with a man. Their different desires were the reason. He wanted to come home after work, have dinner, watch a movie and relax. She now needs activity, go to exhibitions, to the cinema, travel around different cities our country.

you can find useful tips on this topic in the article "".

Other reasons. In addition to the above pretexts for divorce, you can find frequent quarrels, loss of feelings, parents who constantly interfere with relationships, illness, frequent separation of partners, and so on.

What to do?

Is it worth fighting for love - it's up to you! If you feel the strength in yourself, you feel the support of your husband, you see his willingness to resist obstacles, then you will definitely succeed.

Take a break for yourself. Try to part ways for a while. Think, analyze your relationship, what else are you willing to go for, what will you lose if you separate, what will you lose if you stay together. Check out all the options.

Don't jump to conclusions and don't accept quick decisions... Sometimes it is very easy to destroy everything, and then it is impossible to put it back together.

When is it necessary to leave a man? Have you ever forgiven treason? More often you are the initiator of a breakup or a partner?

Take your time and think it over carefully. I'm sure you will definitely find the right solution!

In life, anyone married couple sooner or later comes difficult periodwhen the relationship starts to break down. Former passion goes out, love disappears, and spouses begin to quarrel more often. Once, standing in front of the altar, they swore to each other in eternal love, and now they cannot be near. But how to understand if it's time to get divorced, or in your married life - just a temporary crisis? A crumbling relationship is evidence that it is time to think about divorce. However, you should not rush to make a decision, because, in a hurry, you can make a mistake.

How to understand yourself and understand that it's time to leave

Quarrels and omissions are not always a signal that you need to get divorced. There are no people in the world who, in marriage, would not have problems in relations with their second half. All families face difficulties. Some couples are overcoming a crisis in relationships, while others decide to divorce.

If you find yourself in a similar situation, then ask yourself a few questions that will help you understand whether you really need to break the bonds of marriage or just a black streak in life:

"Do I want a child to be born in our family?" Any woman who loves her spouse wants children from him. This is true of men as well. If you do not want to have children, then there is an unloved person next to you. In such situation the right decision there will be a divorce.

"How will my life change if I break up with my spouse?" Asking yourself this question, imagine that you decided to divorce and finally found the freedom you dreamed of. Are you relieved, or do you regret what you did?

"Do I want to live my whole life with my husband (wife)?" Now imagine yourself and your soul mate in 10, 20, 30 years of marriage. Do you really want to be with this person and meet old age with him?

How to know when to divorce your husband

For many women, divorce is extremely painful. Not everyone can decide on such a crucial step. Some women are afraid of loneliness, the second think that they will not be able to cope with raising children and cannot do without the material support of their husband, and still others still experience some feelings, despite the fact that their life has turned into a nightmare.

It is worth parting with your spouse if there are good reasons for this. Sometimes divorce is the only way for a woman to maintain her psychological and physical health... So, good reasons for parting are:

unreasonable cruelty on the part of a man, physical violence;
the unwillingness of the husband to work and provide for the family;
the presence of a narcotic or alcohol addiction in a man;
disrespectful attitude towards the spouse (constant insults to the woman, humiliation);
betrayal of her husband.

If you have one of the above reasons for divorce, then do not postpone the matter indefinitely. Don't try to change your spouse. You're just wasting your time. Better get divorced faster and start life with blank slate... You will certainly meet such a person who will appreciate, respect, love you and will do everything to make you happy.

How to know when it's time to divorce your once beloved wife

Many believe that love does not go away with the fair sex. They are more committed to their partner. However, women can also fall out of love. You should consider divorce if your wife has not changed for the better:

she ceased to please delicious dishes, does not try to look attractive, dresses up only for walks and meetings with friends, which he does not invite you to;
she has no desire to talk to you, she does not call you at work, does not send SMS messages and is no longer interested in your affairs;
the slightest offense on your part causes a storm in her negative emotions, when talking to you, it becomes simply unbearable.

Pushes for divorce and coldness on the part of the woman in sexual relations... If a spouse sleeps separately in a different room, then this may be a sign of fading love and a crumbling relationship. However, in such cases, you should not rush to divorce. You need to talk to your wife, because she may have some problems that she is hiding from you.

Universal signs that it's time to file for divorce

If you and your spouse have been living for many years, constantly swear over various trifles, do not find mutual languagethen think about parting. Take a closer look at your relationship. You will surely notice signs that it is time to get a divorce:

your love has long faded away, and you endure each other only for the sake of children;
you do not get divorced because you are afraid of condemnation and reproaches from relatives, friends and acquaintances;
you have lost common interests, you have become less communicating with each other;
you don’t do anything for the family; you spend your personal money only for your own needs.

When deciding to divorce, listen to to the inner voice, sort out your feelings. If you feel emptiness in your heart and you don’t see yourself next to your spouse in the future, it means that it’s time to leave. This decision will benefit both of you.

Some more advice from a psychologist:

Divorce is stressful to say the least. Most women do not want to divorce their husbands even if married life has become unbearable. This is because they are afraid of the following:

Responsibility for the children is completely shifted to the shoulders of the mother. Not wanting to feel guilty for taking the father away from the kids, the woman tolerates the presence of her husband to the last.
Loved ones without knowing true circumstances in the family, they often take the side of the husband. Thus, a woman is left without the support of loved ones, which leads to doubts and erroneous conclusions about her act.
Material security is one of the main obstacles to separation. Especially when the spouse is fully supported by the husband. In this case, the stress is double. Although for those who are tired of indecision and boring existence, on the contrary, the search for a job becomes an opportunity for self-realization.
Loneliness and fear, which causes psychological discomfort. The lady needs to come to terms with the idea that now she has new status - "single woman". For many, this is very unpleasant.

Naturally, there are also purely individual reasons why the young lady prefers bad marriage calm loneliness. But there are times when parting is simply necessary. Otherwise living together threatens the undermined physical and psychological health beautiful person.

How to understand that you need to divorce your husband? Alcohol, drug addiction spouse.

The most compelling reasons, because dependent individuals eventually become asocial, degrade and lose all ability to perform family functions. You definitely need to think about the offspring - what do you doom them, forcing them to see their father in an inadequate state almost every day?

Physical violence

Hits - means he loves? Do not make me laugh. There is no such good reason in the world for which a husband could raise his hand against his chosen one. The sooner a break occurs, the better for your health and life.

Moral pressure, despotism

It is not known which is worse - physical abuse or daily moral bullying. If the satellite constantly insults, humiliates, ignores, then over time the passion will turn into one continuous lump of disease. By mocking, the partner destroys the self-esteem of the second half, cultivates inferiority complexes, which leads to psychosomatic failures. The child (if any), seeing how the father treats the mother, acquires his own complexes and problems with relationships in the future.

Constant infidelity

Do I need to close our eyes to treason? If adultery happened once, and if the companion sincerely repents, it is necessary. And if infidelity occurs openly and is accompanied by complete ignorance in relation to the lawful companion - why endure?

Laziness and unwillingness to provide for the family

Yes, everyone can find themselves out of work. certain period own life. You can understand this. But how to understand a person who does not want to go to work and lives completely calmly on the finances of his companion? Isn't there a reason for divorce?

Caution: These tips should be considered for those wives who do not face the compelling reasons for the breakup listed above.

How do you decide to divorce? Psychologists have a wonderful technique that is designed specifically for dealing with confusing situations. Especially in cases where the senses say one thing and the mind another.

The technique is called Cartesian Questions, which goes something like this:

What happens if you do this? (Answer simply).
What won't happen if you do this? This question is designed to identify “secondary benefits”. That is, using the answer, one can determine the advantages of the current situation and the advantages that there is a risk of losing when a new result is achieved.
What won't happen if you don't? Here left hemisphere the brain falls into a stupor. But if you try to look for an answer, then a person can avoid the usual conscious thinking and use other neural channels of the brain. Simply put, you will think about a known situation in a new way. This process helps in understanding those values \u200b\u200band internal forcesthat were previously unknown to you. Therefore, here I would like to wish to seek the answer with the help of intuition, but not logic.
What happens if you don't? It highlights the price you will pay if you continue to live the same way. Or you realize that parting will be a step forward for you, an urge that will change your life for the better.

Important: beforehow to decide on a divorce from my husband, a woman needs to look inside her soul, turn to her values,ask yourself how the current situation is meeting your deepest needs.

Often, when thinking about whether to get a divorce, a lady puts in the first place financial situation... Many women have an insoluble dilemma - material or mental comfort.

There are only two ways out. First - lovely person takes responsibility for his life, becomes independent and financially independent. That is, she chose love and sincerity over money.

The second - the person chooses money and comfort, however, she is forced to adapt and endure, depriving herself of full emotional living. Is it necessary to suffer so much if life is one and it is better not to observe it, but to live it?

Expectations and reality

After scrutinizing the previous questions and answers, you may be surprised to find that it is possible to do without a break in order to eliminate the interfering factors of your married life, as well as to achieve your goals. Because the main part of the positive factors to which a person is so aspired are already present in life, he simply does not see them.

While you have not yet decided to divorce your husband completely, there is a chance for new start... Just for the start, there is no need to radically change your partner. Just change your point of view. If you have achieved this awareness, then grab the chance and change yourself while you are still with your former companion. Because with a new one, you will have to start from scratch. And guarantees that new variant will be better, no.

Consider also the fact that the other person may not be found. Especially when the demands of a woman are too high, and among the stronger sex there are very few ideal ones. Psychologists advise to become a philosopher - to sort out expectations and possibilities. Also believe in yourself, whatever is waiting for you at the finish line.

So, what does a lady expect when she is ready to decide on a divorce from her husband? Of course, subconsciously she expects only one thing - a happy ending:

The partner will get scared, correct, rethink, weigh and quickly begin to do what is expected of him.
The lady will get rid of the annoying partner.
Fate will immediately bring together with a new passion.

But let's return to reality and look at how monstrously further events can disappoint a person:

The partner does not show any reaction and does the same "disgusting".
The partner reacts, but by committing inappropriate actions. They do not fit into the plan you have developed at all, and the loneliness and other "benefits" that appear in connection with the separation are even more annoying than previous problems. So, a lady falls into a zone of doubt and begins to want to turn back time - so that all this would not be at all.
The fate turned out to be cruel and did not give a chance for a bright future, or the chance was received, but spoiled by the same scenario.

So, sometimes a person is left with empty hands and a lonely soul. And complete despair comes when he realizes that the expectations were naive and stupid.

If reflections have not led to the final result, then think about this. And in the young, and in old age married couple connects one very important thing - spiritual relationships. A huge role plays correct communication, trust and closeness not only in bed, but also in spirit. If, thinking about whether to get a divorce or not, you have not found anything similar in your relationship, then there is no point in living together. The couple will suffer longing and loneliness with each other.

Signs that the gap is close

The inevitable approach of a break in steam feels intuitively. Sometimes this is determined by some signs that are a warning. There are many cases when one of the couple had a presentiment of an impending storm, but did not have enough reason to explain what was happening.

The first signal is limited communication between people. The partner suddenly becomes withdrawn, immersed in his personal experiences and does not want to share with his soul mate. Of course, this behavior is inherent in a man and in case of problems at work or with health ( male diseases, eg). Therefore, the situation here is still to be clarified, and isolation does not mean that it is worth getting a divorce.

But if a storm is indeed approaching, then the development scenario is more or less clear. After immersion in himself, the husband becomes colder with his passion:

Refuses physical intimacy.
When showing any signs of attention from the wife, the spouse is indignant, irritated and even behaves aggressively.
Attempts to independently (without asking your opinion) solve everyday important issues.
Attempts to ask where my husband was, how the day went and why he was late for dinner, the reaction follows - "my personal affairs do not concern you."

This stage has already been significantly launched. It is, of course, possible to return the relationship to its former course, but it will be very difficult. After all, the spouses behave like almost strangers.

But what if you want to save the relationship? In this situation, go to a psychologist. Although, it happens - when one partner cools down, the other does the same. And this happens by itself. But here, too, there is a plus - the decision to leave will be deliberate, balanced and mutual.

It is very difficult for a woman to decide on a divorce. A woman takes marriage very seriously and makes the decision to divorce more stressful for her.

Divorce from her husband becomes a real drama. This step changes a woman's entire life.

I want to divorce my husband, but I can't decide - how to understand myself?

"I want to divorce my husband, but I can't make up my mind"

And now another lady ran away from her husband. She ran away from resentment, broken expectations, claims and meaningless existence together. She left as if from the battlefield, turning her family life in the battlefield.

The first few days a woman has a feeling of lightness, because she so wanted to get away from her unloved more husband... These sensations are similar to the situation when you are carrying heavy bags and when you carry and throw them off yourself, you feel relief.

But these feelings overwhelm a person only for the first time. Then throwing occurs. The woman understands that she has not solved her task in this relationship. Because of this, she starts looking for a new man. If there is one, then with a 90% probability, life with him will go according to the same scenario. Each author has the same style.

Don't be surprised by this. This is not because of men.

Every man is normal potential husbandwith whom you can start a family.

Any man can be accepted and respected. Every family has internal resources to work with.

When people agree to marry unprepared, they turn into blind kittens who share the cat's milk among themselves. If you consciously look at the situation, then you can always find a choice and a solution.

But a woman stubbornly lives the same experience, tries to change her partner, wants him to dance to her tune.

This is all written to the fact that indecision in making a decision indicates that you are acting as in the example. You want to abandon a sinking ship, instead of starting to patch holes in it and make reconstruction.

If you do not agree with this, then answer the question: "Have you done everything in your power for the development of the family?" If the answer is no, then look for something that you haven't done yet, but could.

Everyone experiences crisis moments, but some run to get divorced, while others are looking for a way out of the situation and become happy.

But there are situations in which divorce becomes the most optimal solution... Then the woman answers the previous question in the affirmative. Yes, I did my best. If yes did not sound, and there was no desire to do something, then this pure water escape. From your fears, expectations, from your husband, from yourself.

When a woman uses the model of flight, future men will be even worse than the previous ones. This is how nagging, claims, and exaggerated requirements for all men arise. Such a woman will be surrounded by those whom she most does not want to accept. This is due to the fact that she does not see others, everything by default becomes not the same as it should be.

That is why it is worth doing everything that depends on you for the relationship. When a person does this, then the thought I want to divorce my husband, but I cannot decide, it disappears and the final decision comes.

I want to divorce my husband, but I can't decide - why are women afraid of divorce?

"I want to divorce my husband"

I want to divorce my husband in question, but I can't make up my mind, there are many fears and doubts hidden that keep a woman from making a decision. Because of fears, a woman is forced to continue living with a man for years.

Fear of the future of children. When there is a child in the family, it complicates the process of making such a cardinal decision. If a woman only carries a baby under her heart, divorce is even more frightening.

Being with her husband, even an alcoholic, the woman thinks that the two of them will be better able to provide for the child than she herself. After the divorce, she will become a single mother with a child in her arms.

A pregnant woman feels twice as vulnerable and defenseless.
Where to get money for life? This question tickles the nerves of many women who want to get a divorce. If a woman is accustomed to the fact that her husband regularly brought at least some money, but she herself did not work, then the fear will be ten times greater.
Fear of judgment. A woman can be scared that others may not understand her decision to divorce. The opinion of others is so important for some women that because of it they are ready to endure life with an unloved husband.
Fear of loneliness. A woman may think that when she divorces her husband, she will not meet anyone else. Because of this, she can continue to live with her husband.

I want to divorce my husband, but I can't make up my mind - What decision should I make?

All patience ends. Women who cannot decide to divorce are champions here. But is it worth it if you can change your destiny once and for all.

It is easier to endure, because we remain in a state of sacrifice, for women it is very convenient. By default, all responsibility is shifted to the husband, and the woman proudly bears the image of a sufferer.

Instead of making a decision, instead of building their own happiness with their own hands, women continue to talk, I want to divorce my husband, but I cannot make up my mind. They scold their husbands, because they are to blame for everything.

This position of the child does not make it easier for anyone. So what scares you more fear of loneliness, fear of the future, or the opportunity to take your destiny into your own hands.

From women you often hear: “I want to divorce my husband, but I cannot decide” and no one goes further than this.

They remain unhappy wives and torture their husbands with this.

I want to divorce my husband, but I can't decide - When is it worth thinking again?
"Divorce from her husband"

In order to decide whether to divorce, it is important to know if the decision will be wrong. Divorce is the collapse of a relationship; divorce will definitely affect your destiny.

And the reasons for divorce must be serious. But first, let's look at those cases in which there is no need to rush to divorce your husband.

You have a lover. It so happens that even the most devoted wives have an affair. What if you have romantic feelings associated with another man?

Even if it seems to you that new romance Are the most serious relationship in your life, and your marriage withers against the background of these experiences, do not rush. The female sex is easily led by emotions. If you do not want to be at a broken trough, then take your time. There are stories of hundreds of women who abandoned their husbands and went to a new lover, but returned to their husbands a month later.

The wisdom of a woman lies in the fact that she will not run to another, but will find in her husband all those qualities that she lacks in him for complete happiness.

Resentment against her husband. Resentment and conflicts are frequent occasions for divorce. But conflict situations - a matter of everyday life. Is it worth it to ruin everything because of a misunderstanding, guesswork. Maybe first you need to learn to listen to each other, not to hurt each other. Women are good at blaming their husbands and not analyzing their own mistakes. Therefore, due to household nonsense, they begin to think about divorce.

If you and your husband have obvious misunderstandings, conflicts and claims, think better about what you can do to change this.

Don't know how? Sign up for a consultation with family psychologist, eventually. If you do not learn to regulate conflicts, that is great chance the fact that in future relationships, quarrels and curses will be repeated.

Feelings are gone. At the beginning of the relationship with my husband, there was passion and positiveness, now it has become boring, you more and more often resort to the idea that I do not love my husband any more. This may be due to a crisis in the relationship.

Attachment, habit, everyday life - all couples go through this. If you want to feel again all those emotions that were at the beginning of your relationship, start working on it with your husband. Falling in love with your husband again means falling in love with him again.

It is in your power to start looking at your husband in a new way and kindle the flame of love.

I want to divorce my husband, but I can't decide - In what case is a divorce necessary?

There are situations in which a divorce is necessary. And here all doubts should be left behind.

The husband is abusing alcohol or drugs. Strange as it may seem, few women leave such husbands. This is a real tragedy for the family. But the husband's chemical addiction creates psychological dependence wives. The woman believes that she is obliged to save her husband, but in the end she and the children suffer. You need to leave such husbands.
The husband is a tyrant. Domestic violence ingrained in the lives of many families. Violence is not only physical acts, it is also constant psychological pressure. If your husband constantly humiliates and insults you, use physical strengththen run away from him, do not tolerate this in the hope that he will correct himself.

The husband has a mistress. Women suffer and suffer greatly from the fact of treason. The husband goes to his mistress, he may not even hide it, and you still say, I want to divorce my husband, but I can’t make up my mind.

Stop guessing, take up the decision. From the fact that you delay your decision, he will not stop cheating on you.
It sits on your neck. If you have become the only breadwinner of the family, and your husband is not able to strike a finger, then, of course, this is a disaster. First of all for you. He is probably satisfied with everything. A man without a goal is like a suitcase without a handle. You and him are definitely on different paths.

I want to divorce my husband, but I can't decide - the pros and cons of divorce

Possible cons:

1) Undermined self-esteem.

Women are going through a hard break, this is due to the many fears that overwhelm them at this moment. All this together negatively affects women's self-confidence.

2) Loss of an important parental resource by a child.

Strong adults are very important in a child's life. When there is no parent in the life of a child, then he is deprived of support and confidence in his abilities. The child becomes a strong personality in a strong and strong family.

3) Self-flagellation and depression.

Women tend to experience a divorce for a long time, regret what they have done, and ask themselves, what if we had not gotten a divorce. A man experiences divorce more easily. It is not difficult for him to find a new companion for himself.

It is more difficult for a woman to cope with this.

The other side of the coin suggests that if you realized that you cannot be happy in a relationship with your husband, did everything for their development, but in the end did not receive anything, then a divorce opens up solid prospects for both personal growth and new successful relationships.

I want to divorce my husband, but I can't decide - the advice of a psychologist will help make a decision