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How to get rid of shyness. Overcoming shyness once and for all: advice from a psychologist. Failure is a learning experience

Often mothers and grandmothers early childhood inspire their daughters that a girl should be modest. Then growing up, these girls do not know how to get rid of this modesty. They do not know what to do so as not to interfere with their lives.

On the one hand, there is nothing wrong with modesty, especially for a woman. It is associated with good manners and politeness. Nature itself instills courage and activity in a man, and passivity, modesty and balance in a woman. On the other hand, excessive modesty, uncertainty irritates to the point of impossibility. And what happens to such a person in real life.

55% of teenagers suffer from modesty, how much suffering they experience because of this. As people age, they become less timid, but some people experience communication difficulties even at an older age.

Modest people are not lucky either in their personal lives or in their careers. Because they can't take care of themselves. Such people cannot present themselves, even if they are good workers and professionals receive a small salary and no career development they are not expected. The bosses love such workers because they are silent, do not demand a salary increase. But there is no respect for such people.

Modesty can take pathological forms. Such people cannot fight back if they are rude, they will be silent when they shortchange him in the store. At that moment, when it is necessary to stand up for their rights, they will only blush, turn pale, and will not be able to say a word in defense of themselves.

So modesty of course good quality when it is present in moderation, but it should not interfere with living, enjoying and having fun. And for this, first of all, you need to have some of your own own desires, albeit very modest.

To overcome modesty, you need to know the reason for your shyness. Most often, the feeling of shyness comes from the fact that you think how others will discuss you if you do something wrong. It seems to you that people do not like you, that for some reason you are worse than them. You expect things to go wrong. You are tense and worried, so things really do not go as we would like.

Due to your excessive modesty, people may think that you are unfriendly, uneducated and generally arrogant. But in fact, you are simply afraid to approach, start a conversation, afraid to express your opinion, show your feelings. By doing this, you deprive yourself of the joy of life. But everything can be fixed with effort and work on yourself.

Here are 10 tips to get rid of excessive modesty:

1. Make an effort not to worry about what other people think of you. People will judge you not by some external manifestations but by what kind of person you really are.

2. Do not demand perfection from yourself, be yourself. Look at your shortcomings and advantages realistically.

3. Evaluate other people honestly, do not attribute to them undeservedly bad intentions towards you. Trust that people treat you as equals.

4. Learn to be more sociable, smile more often and greet other people. Learn to strike up a conversation yourself.

5. Try to treat yourself with a sense of humor if you say something wrong. Ignore it, keep talking.

6. Stand in front of you real goals, learn to strike up a conversation with others, talk to strangers confident and at ease.

7. If you need to speak in front of a large audience, prepare in advance for this event. Dress tastefully so you don't feel uncomfortable about it. People will enjoy looking at you. Communicate visually with the audience, convince them that you are telling them something very important to them.

8. Learn to develop a conversation with the interlocutor, make compliments, ask the opinion of your interlocutor.

9. Look at yourself in the mirror and mentally describe yourself with better side. See if you need to change something in yourself, maybe change your hairstyle. Talk to a loved one you trust. the main task find in yourself good traits and quality.

10. Talk to yourself as if talking about another person. List your faults and judge that others have worse faults than you. But they feel much more confident in society than you do. Then list all your virtues, and you will see that you are much better than others and you don’t have to be modest.

To some extent, modesty is present in every person. But don't give her power over you. Rather than locking yourself up in solitude, it is better to free yourself from timidity and enjoy the company of other people. We hope that our 10 ways to get rid of excessive modesty will help you.

Instruction

First of all, think about why you begin to feel shy when you are around a stranger? If you are afraid of what people around you will think, try to understand that they do not follow your every move, and they have their own thoughts and problems.

Start fighting with modesty yu with the help simple exercises. Go out to any public place and try to talk. Ask him a question that interests you, smile and be sure to thank him for the information received. The more people you can talk to, the more confident you will start to feel. Repeat these steps every day, constantly increasing the number of people you don't know. Gradually, you will stop being afraid of communication and will be able to get rid of excessive modesty.

Learn to walk confidently. Straighten your back, raise your head slightly, smile and click your heels. In no case do not hide your hands in your pockets, but keep them freely, without crossing them behind your back or on your chest. Imagine that you have done a favor by coming here. Do not be afraid to catch the eyes of strangers on yourself, you should not care where they look and what they think. Your goal is to effectively enter and hit the opposite sex with this.

Sign up for a singing class. At first it will be difficult for you, so ask the vocal master about private lessons, then gradually the number of participants and spectators should be increased. Being constantly in the center of attention, you can get used to it and stop feeling embarrassed. To make it easier to sing, practice at home in front of a mirror while turning on music with your favorite songs loudly.

Start taking the initiative. Even if you make a mistake in something, do not be upset, but analyze your act and try to avoid this in the future.

In the old days in Russia, modesty was considered a virtue, but the modern rhythm of life makes a person be active and self-confident. To overcome excessive modesty, you need to seriously work on yourself - only in this way can you achieve success in your personal and professional life.

Instruction

Use psychological reception helping to get rid of excessive stiffness. It has long been noticed that the external and internal are closely interconnected. This means that if you want to overcome modesty, you need to adopt the behavior of a confident and open person. Watch your leader or a successful colleague, note the gestures, postures and habits of a self-confident person and “try on” it all for yourself in front of the mirror. Learn to calmly move, speak, not pinch and keep relaxed.

Try an exercise that develops social skills and helps you deal with communication difficulties. It means that you must become familiar with different people. Try to talk to strangers in any situation and in the most different places- in a store, on a train, etc. The more often you communicate, the less you will feel shy and tense during a conversation. Remember your timbre of speech, gestures and facial expressions in direct conversation. In the future, these feelings will help you regain confidence when communicating with any person.

Imagine being strong and attractive person or find a role model among famous personalities. If you manage to fully get used to the role, you will be able to act much more relaxed and confident.

Many of us condemn liberated, self-confident people, although in fact we want to be like them. This is not surprising, since such individuals strive to become the soul of the company, they energize and leave a piece of themselves after leaving. On the other hand, non-shy people seem self-confident and arrogant. One way or another, in order to overcome shyness, you need to study all aspects and draw up a competent plan. Let's talk about everything in order.

Reasons for shyness

  1. People become shy when they spend a lot of time alone. The inability to communicate socially is caused by a lack of basic communication skills.
  2. The genetic factor also contributed. If a child grows up in a family with shy parents, this feature will be transferred automatically.
  3. Insecure people are often shy. This is due to constant criticism from others or low self-esteem imposed by the subconscious.
  4. Fear of communication with others and, as a result, isolation, arise due to the experienced psychological trauma. A person tries to protect himself from future losses, so he becomes shy.
  5. If a child lives in a family that regularly criticizes and humiliates him, the child will automatically grow up withdrawn. The same applies to children living in permanent bans.
  6. There are people who are afraid to "fall into the mud face." This is due to public censure, a person does not want to be rejected by colleagues, friends, relatives and even unfamiliar people.
  7. Stereotypes influence the formation of life principles. If a child has been constantly praised and had high expectations, he will try to do everything not to destroy the illusion. Such a person is afraid to express his thoughts in the future.

How to get rid of shyness

It should be remembered that isolation is not a vice. Young girls are much more attractive when a blush appears on their cheeks, and their voice trembles slightly. However, if such a feature prevents you from fully existing, you need to get rid of it.

Method number 1. Chat with strangers

  1. In most cases, people become shy well in advance of interacting with strangers. Such behavior is erroneous, because you cannot baptize children with these people.
  2. Accept invitations from friends to visit various parties, concerts, cinemas. Get in the habit of meeting at least 2 new people a month.
  3. At first, you can smooth things over by making friends through social media. Start with VKontakte or Odnoklassniki, then make an appointment yourself when you're ready.
  4. Get out more often. Visit crowded cafes and restaurants, crowded places. Stand in line while paying utilities, communicate.
  5. get busy independent decision urgent questions. This applies more to visiting authorities and other serious offices (passport office, housing and communal services, tax, etc.).

Method number 2. Find new buddies

  1. Visit social groups or register on forums where people share their doubts. Find someone with the same problem. Discuss with him the topic: "How to overcome shyness."
  2. It is also recommended to find a person by the method of "on the contrary". It is important that a new acquaintance does not have complexes and shyness. This personality will constantly pull you out of your comfort zone. This will help loosen up.
  3. Each person comes into your life for a reason. Choose a circle of communication in such a way that people of all social groups. Of course, you should not go into crime.
  4. If possible, communicate only with successful people. Create an idol for yourself, follow his path. Do not be afraid of your own mistakes, they are required for experience.

Method number 3. Do bold things

  1. Analyze your life. Highlight the actions that you could not decide long time. Have you been planning to jump with a rope or a parachute for a long time? Dare!
  2. Regardless of whether you are a man or a woman, take a closer look at motor vehicles. People on two-wheeled iron horses look bold and confident. Unlearn category "A", buy a sports bike and equipment.
  3. Actions that can overcome shyness include participating in television programs(in particular extras), beauty contests and other public performances. Presenting your thoughts to the public will liberate you, most importantly, prepare carefully.
  4. If you are a girl, wear an extravagant petite top or shoes on high heels. Rethink your image, dye your hair in bright shade. Visit a fetish hangout, visit charity events or become a volunteer.
  5. People who have long-term sympathy for the opposite sex, it is worth inviting a person on a date. Take courage and dare, live for today.
  6. In all of these actions, it is important to know the measure. Do not jump right off the bat, think about your own safety and morale. Do not run into trouble, carefully plan and predict all actions.

Method number 4. Gain confidence

  1. In most cases, people become shy because of complexes that appear over the years or stem from childhood. To get rid of shyness, it is necessary to eliminate uncertainty in all possible ways.
  2. If you don't feel comfortable because the weight class is over the top, go for it. Sign up for a gym, get rid of cellulite, go on a diet. Buy clothes that hide imperfections.
  3. Revisit your image. Do new haircut, change your hair color, go for a manicure and pedicure. Attend makeup courses, find "your" cosmetics, don't go out without makeup.
  4. Get rid of the "junk". It applies old clothes with spools and outstretched knees, shabby shoes and bags, old jackets. Replace every discarded item with a new, more stylish and unusual one.
  5. Evaluate your capabilities with regards to your current profession, develop in your career, increase your earnings. Try to communicate with people who have already achieved heights. Learn their secrets of success, share your own experience.
  6. Love pushes for more, find a gentleman or life partner. Pretend for the sake of your loved one, make each other happy. A stable personal life adds confidence.

Method number 5. Describe yourself

  1. Prepare a notebook, write down your positive sides. Be sure to specify not only about mental and physical abilities, but also external data.
  2. For example, you can write that you are positive, courageous, successful. It is desirable to clarify the ability to achieve goals and objectives, responsive nature, kindness.
  3. If you are having difficulty with your characterization, contact your relatives or friends. Make up psychological picture together.
  4. You need to specify as many as possible positive qualities. Number them for clarity. Hang the list on the refrigerator or bathroom mirror. Re-read every morning and believe in what you have written.
  5. It is important to remember forever that a person is made up of his own thoughts and beliefs. Think positively about yourself, never doubt your own abilities.

Method number 6. Develop materially and spiritually

  1. In the near future, you need to communicate more with versatile people. This method will increase your communication skills and relieve you of shyness.
  2. To become interesting interlocutor develop spiritually. Read books, attend seminars personal growth. Examine your social circle, remove those who pull you down.
  3. Money plays a big role in modern world. People who say otherwise are deeply mistaken. With finance you can secure yourself decent life, travel, be confident in the future.
  4. Isn't that what eradicates shyness?! Look for a more profitable profession or ways of additional income. Never stop. Get in the habit of raising your salary by at least 10% per month. At the same time, learn to procrastinate.
  5. If you still don't know who you want to be, it's time to fix the situation. Analyze what you are drawn to the most. Perhaps to mathematics, art or other creativity? Do you like to work with your hands or your head? Based on this, shape yourself.

Method number 7. go in for sports

  1. Worthy physical form Raises self-esteem and fighting spirit. Gyms are visited by many people, so contact with them is often indispensable. Feel free to ask how to use certain simulators. Look for new acquaintances.
  2. Agree with friends that you will throw off 5 kg. and pump up the buttocks, abs, arms. Limit yourself to specific limits. Start running, jump rope, squat.
  3. It is not necessary to spend fabulous money on a subscription. Enjoy summer and winter sports without overpaying your hard-earned funds.
  4. If you still decide to visit specific sections, consider Pilates, water aerobics, stretching, yoga, dancing of all directions, kickboxing, cross-fit.
  5. In clubs you will be taught to behave liberated. The coach will tell you how to get rid of shyness and will do everything to ensure that you achieve your goals. Especially shy people should turn to a professional instructor in a particular sport.

Method number 8. Please your loved ones

  1. Learn to give joy to relatives and close friends. In return, they will show gratitude to you, make compliments. In this simple way, you will gain confidence and stop doubting yourself.
  2. Stop conflicts, do not harbor anger and resentment. They will eat you from the inside. Communicate with people politely, give tenderness and love to those who deserve it.
  3. For own peace of mind get a calendar. Specify in it significant dates, birthdays of their friends and relatives. It is important to understand that without social communication the person fades.

Identify the causes of shyness, eradicate them in short time. Constantly work on yourself, do not stop there. Find passive income, climb the career ladder. Review your wardrobe and your image in general. Go in for sports, look for new circles of acquaintances, travel. Take the initiative in communicating with friends, establish personal life, please loved ones.

Video: how to stop being shy


Hello to everyone who is afraid to call, meet new people, dance in the crowd, return goods to the store, ask the minibus driver to stop at the place you need, etc. Does every step in society that you have to take lead to the fact that you step over yourself? Stiffness kills dreams, hinders normal life a person affects behavior in society, so you must understand how to overcome shyness and self-doubt.

Where does

It's all about self-criticism. Shy people are unusually dependent on others, they have low self-esteem, there is uncertainty and even dissatisfaction in life. A shy person is ready to limit himself to standard work in which he will not catch the eye of others.

He will be ready to remove all friends from his life, if only to experience less stress of communication. He is completely lost in simple everyday situations, such as phone calls or communication with sales assistants.

Each time the situation only gets worse, because every action that you fail to implement in communication is small blow according to your self-assessment, a step towards even greater isolation. You can no longer understand how to get rid of shyness and tightness. The inner Samoyed that lives in a shy person completely destroys your self-confidence. In such a state, to overcome oneself is practically a feat.

If you want to get out of the state of shyness, you need to take a whole lot of steps. When you start to overcome yourself, decide how to deal with shyness, at least just think through your actions, it becomes easier for you. Time after time, without steps back, you will move towards a free existence in which excessive modesty can be discarded. Indeed, in our case, it is really superfluous, simply because it interferes with life!

Exercises

Let's look at the advice of a psychologist on how to overcome shyness, modesty and self-doubt. After each exercise, especially if it was really difficult, you need to reward yourself with a sweet, going to a beauty salon, in the evening with your favorite book, a warm bath or new purchases. Everyone will choose something for themselves.

Exercise 1. During the day, smile at 20 strangers on the street, looking into their eyes and not hiding from them. It may be quite difficult at first, but such an exercise will help you gradually integrate into society. You will show yourself that the world around you is not trying to offend you, it is quite positive and is also ready to share warmth.


If this is difficult, start with a smile to yourself in the mirror, an open smile to friends and relatives. Such a seemingly simple action qualitatively changes people's lives, helps to relieve tension and insecurity, so you should always start your day and business with a smile!

Exercise 2. During the day, several times ask people on the street what time it is. Do not choose people that suit you, try to cover as many categories as possible: grandmothers, schoolchildren, young girls, and men. Ask 15 times until you feel confident. If the task is well performed, you can complicate it. In this case, the person should try to ask again, as if he did not hear the answer. This helps to understand that people will not refuse such simple help, they adequately relate to questions, they are positive towards you. Yes, even if a passer-by refuses, there is nothing terrible or stupid in this.


If the exercise is difficult or you do not understand how to get rid of shyness at this moment, try to imagine the situation well: from the second when you approach the person to the moment when you say goodbye. A positive study of the situation, which will tell you how to overcome shyness in this situation, will lead to an excellent result!

Exercise 3 Try to “turn out” something in your image, for example, clothes. Go to a standard meeting wearing an inside-out sweater and see if the people you know notice the change. This will help you realize that people are not as picky about your appearance as you think. They may not even notice the flaw right away.

Appearance will not destroy your relationship, it really is not the worst thing that can happen in your life. You are more important than your clothes or your image. It is necessary to separate opinions about you and your essence. If you find it difficult, start with some inconspicuous wardrobe item, such as different socks on your feet or an inside-out T-shirt.


You will begin to understand that any flaw is easy to fix, for example, change into a sweater. There is nothing wrong with this. And you won't look stupid!

Exercise 4 Direct your feet to the hairdresser and ask the master to offer you new look. Ask as many questions as you can, offer your ideas and, most importantly, don't be afraid to refuse the service under the pretext that you need to think. Go around several salons to work out such a situation to automatism. You need to speak clearly, loudly, confidently. To consolidate the result, go around 5-6 salons. And as a reward, you can get a haircut where you really liked it!


This approach helps to increase their importance in front of you. You will realize that you deserve attention, self-care and being listened to. You have the right to refuse the service and decide what is best for you. If you find it difficult, start with salons that are far from home.

Exercise 5 Buy an item in a store and then return it. You can actually do it legally! And you need to pick up the hardness in your voice to get rid of the thing that you changed your mind about wearing. The seller will persuade you to keep the thing for yourself, but stand your ground and be sure! Walk around 4-5 stores to deal with your stiffness.


If it's difficult for you, take your mother, girlfriend or friend with you. Then the seller certainly will not be rude to you. Only now it is you who needs to speak, do not shift it to another, because you are looking for the answer to the question of how to get rid of shyness. You will have nothing to be afraid of, which means that you will be able to overcome a difficult everyday situation for many shy people.

How does the life of people who overcome stiffness change?

  • Gen. As we have seen, there are quite a few simple everyday situations in which a shy person feels insecure. Starting from a call to the clinic reception (postponing a trip to the doctor can affect your health), ending with the inability to ask for directions (getting lost and looking for a way in an unfamiliar place is not the best choice for leisure!). Saying goodbye to such difficulties, deciding how to overcome shyness means really changing the quality of life!
  • Relations. Problems with shyness in relationships are, of course, central. The inability not only to tell a pretty person that you like him, but also in principle to communicate with him is bitter! We must start taking steps, we must start warm relationship you need to look for friends. If only because friends, relatives and loved ones are the basis of our life. And shyness destroys this foundation. A person who has overcome himself, who has realized how to get rid of shyness, will be able to build new relationships, will be able to say if something does not suit him, will be able to plan a life together.
  • Dreams. Shyness is insecurity, and insecurity is self-loathing. A person who considers himself unworthy of various benefits, who has not decided how to deal with shyness, can he afford to dream? Of course not. Your childhood dreams are blown away by social failure. You gradually convince yourself that you will not succeed, but your stiffness does not allow you to emerge back onto the path of success. Maybe you sing beautifully, but… stage fright. You play volleyball cool, but you are afraid to approach the playing company ... You put poetry together perfectly, but they do not leave your table. Letting go means letting go of your dreams. A person free from shyness achieves more. Because his horizons are expanding, and he really can do anything!
  • Career. Career, akin to dreams, of course, goes up. You stop enjoying the little office that no one comes into, where you do things that others don't notice. You want to realize yourself. You want to emerge from behind the office fence and start doing what is really meant for you in life. Write. Take pictures. Maybe even manage people.
This is the difference, “to have or not to have” is up to you. Remember that every day you are moving either towards total modesty that destroys your life, or towards a happy open existence.

The question of how to stop being shy, withdrawn and insecure worries a huge number of people who want to overcome their inner fear.

Since the listed character traits are rarely found one by one, but flow from each other (a shy person is usually withdrawn and unsure of himself), in order to suppress them, you will have to do serious step-by-step work on yourself.

Shyness in any form prevents you from being yourself.
A person fully reveals himself only when he feels at ease.
Stefan Zweig. Impatience of the heart

Introduction

The phrase “modesty adorns” has long been set on edge. Yes, in some situations, modesty is needed, because excessive boasting or obvious narcissism is not to face worthy person. But shyness is something else.

This quality prevents the most modest person from living, and puts his environment into a stupor - they try to help him, understand, reveal, but this does not always work out. As a result, a shy person falls out of public life because he is boring and there is nothing to talk about. And this gives rise to new complexes in a closed person and negative emotions. And something needs to be done about it.

If you take some actions, make your efforts and back up with a great desire, then everything will definitely work out!

Finding out the cause is the first step on the road to success

The ancient sages said: "Find the cause of the problem - and this is already half of its solution." A person becomes withdrawn, shy or insecure due to certain experiences, psychological trauma or events in his life.

Based on negative experience he sees no alternative favorable development events and does not try to change the habitual pattern of behavior. All this leads to more big problems, including, hermitage, passivity, escape from reality into the world of fantasy, illusion, virtual games.

Most common causes shyness, isolation or insecurity in the company of strangers are considered:

  • fear;
  • resentment;
  • stress;
  • psychological trauma.

Fear

For example, fear invariably breeds distrust of everything unfamiliar. Instinctively, a person withdraws into himself, believing that in this way he will avoid problems, awkward situations, and possible ridicule.

Often, with a closer acquaintance, a person reveals himself in a company from a completely different side, but on initial stage fear makes him be extremely careful in his statements and actions.

Resentment at the world for the failures that have occurred, it also becomes a cause of shyness, isolation, and uncertainty. A person fences himself off from reality, not allowing himself to share his own experiences, emotions, or positive impressions with others.

Unfortunately, over time, resentment only accumulates, and if it does not find a natural outlet, then the person becomes aggressive, and sometimes even dangerous to society. Therefore, before you stop being shy and insecure, you should definitely get rid of the mentioned feeling.

Stress, psychological trauma

Experienced stress or previous psychological trauma forces the individual to close his inner world from outsiders. According to statistics, more than 40% of respondents experience depressive states and dissatisfied with their own lives, do not make contact with unfamiliar people.

Usually, the invisible subsides with coping with stress, recovery vital energy, arrival positive emotions. As for psychological trauma, everything is much more complicated here, especially when they were inflicted during the formation of the personality (that is, in childhood). Sometimes, help is needed to overcome their consequences. qualified specialist.

How to stop being shy: a guide to action

1. Faith in success

The most difficult thing is to take the first step towards a more liberated self. It may even seem to you that this is unrealistic, that nothing will come of this whole undertaking. Drive away these thoughts! This is not true. You will definitely succeed. Believing in yourself and your success is very important, so stock up on them to the fullest.

2. You are no worse than others

The next stage is the understanding that you are no worse than other people. You are the same, and in some qualities you are superior to many. Remember all your virtues and skills. Some of them are not a sin to brag about or at least demonstrate to the world.

For example, do you write poetry? Stop hiding them! Join a literary community, show your creations to other people. Let not everyone like your poems, but you will definitely find fans of your work.

Remember, in order to receive compliments and approval, you need to show people what you can be praised for. If you are closed, then you simply will not be noticed. And learn to love yourself the way you are. Nobody is perfect.

3. Failure is a learning experience

Criticism or life failures are not always bad. Take your failures not as the end of the world, but as a certain experience that makes you wiser and stronger.

Remember famous phrase"What doesn't kill us makes us stronger"?

Let it be hackneyed, but very truthful. It really is! Therefore, you can be a little sad, even cry, and the next day you pull yourself together and move on to a better life.

4. Face your fears

To overcome your indecision, you need to work hard on yourself. You must be embarrassed to speak in public. Start at least with the pronunciation of toasts. This is a test for many people: to find certain words, to collect them in beautiful offers and pronounce it publicly, albeit in small company loved ones. It is better to prepare this short speech in advance, think over all the wishes and repeat several times. You will understand that everything is not so scary. Everyone will definitely like it. Try it!

You can also turn to strangers on the street more often with different questions. For example, asking how to get to such and such a street. This will also liberate you, you will be less afraid of communication.

5. Become a pleasant conversationalist

Do you think that in order to carry on a conversation, you need to have some secret knowledge or have special relationship with a person? This is far from always the case. Many sociable people talk to others about real trifles. So it would not hurt you to adopt this quality, even if it seems stupid at first.

Start by talking about the weather, no matter how trite it may be. Then you can discuss the cases that connect you with the interlocutor. If this is a co-worker, you can talk about the problem of parking near the office building. If a neighbor - about how the bills for rent have risen. The main thing is to start, and the conversation itself can develop, especially if your interlocutor is more sociable than you. Practice! And you will get involved.

6. Compliment

People love to hear pleasant words addressed to you, even if they are said in passing. And especially women! Give them compliments. It is not necessary to scatter in praise. Suffice it to say that the young lady today has a successful styling or Nice dress. You will see how she will immediately become more disposed towards you.

7. The right attitude

Train yourself every day to tune in to the good. A positive mood, albeit from scratch, will help you overcome life's obstacles. Healthy optimism never hurt anyone!

Additional ways to get rid of shyness

Before you stop being shy in companies or when meeting new people, you need to understand that solving this problem depends entirely on the person himself. In order to become more open, liberated, sociable, you will need certain time. For some, a few weeks are enough to achieve success, while for others it will take several years before all manifestations of the described negative qualities are finally eradicated.

There are now several effective ways how to stop being shy and closed, insecure.
This list includes:

  • personal training;
  • development of communication skills;
  • performance special exercises("to go ahead").

The method of personal training has now gained immense popularity, as it allows you to inspire a person that he is no worse and no better than other unfamiliar people.

Usually, the delivery of specific attitudes takes place in the form of a “teacher-student”, when an experienced mentor (psychologist) convinces closed and insecure people that no one in the company seeks to ridicule, offend, or humiliate them.

Many of them also experience a certain amount of excitement, but in no way show their own negative feelings. Regular sessions with a specialist who knows how to convince contribute to the achievement of results, and a person overcomes the fear of communication.

Sometimes it is recommended to develop communication skills by doing certain exercises. One of the most useful options how to stop being shy in a company will be modeling the situation in front of a mirror. It will not be superfluous to prepare a few universal jokes that allow you to defuse a tense situation or give confidence in your abilities. The more a person “rehearses” alone with himself, the more confident and at ease he will feel in a real situation.

An innovative technique was the performance of tasks that require considerable courage from an indecisive shy person. For example, he should come up and talk on the street with complete strangers, ask for a phone number from attractive girl(guy), tell about some event in public place. Already after 2-3 such exercises, progress is noticeable, as a person overcomes fear, becomes more open to the outside world, gains self-confidence.

A few important tips for success

Psychologists identify several key aspects of how to stop being shy in the company and at the same time win the favor of strangers.

The list of such conditions always includes:

  • acceptance of constraint (excitement, isolation) as a due fact;
  • positive thinking, smile, neat appearance;
  • lack of comparison of oneself with other people;
  • training slow intelligible speech.

It is necessary to clearly realize that to be shy, to experience excitement or a sense of isolation in certain situations- it's quite normal. Do not try to hide your emotions, because it always looks unnatural and repulsive. At the same time, the appearance, facial expression, and intonation of the voice are of key importance for the initial impression of a person, so always try to look “sparkly”, exude positive, and don’t forget to smile.

You do not need to constantly draw a parallel with more successful people in the company, otherwise this can lead to negativity, detachment, a desire to quickly go to a quiet secluded place. A huge problem for many people is slurred fast speech, which not all participants in the conversation can make out. Learn to spell own thoughts clearly, clearly, slowly, which will attract the attention of others, avoiding sharp ridicule.

Outcome

Shyness can be overcome - add some effort to your desire and soon you will see positive result! Be active, decisive and open to people.

Overcoming shyness, shyness, self-doubt is possible only with the help of painstaking work on oneself, positive thinking, getting rid of fears or complexes. Fight your weaknesses, prejudices, negativity - and you will definitely become a successful attractive person!