How to marry a loved one? A lot of girls are interested in how to get married quickly. Prayer to Nicholas the Wonderworker

A wedding is a logical decision for two loving friend friend of people who already for a long time live together. However not worth the hassle with this. According to statistics, during the first year life together more than half of marriages are concluded, and with each next year this percentage is much lower.

And if the beloved man does not propose to his girlfriend for a long time, although they are well together, you need to find out why he is pulling, and try to persuade him to propose marriage to her. Otherwise, the more time it takes, the more likely the fact that a woman will not hear the cherished words. How to marry someone you love if he doesn't think to talk about the wedding?

Convince him that your marriage will be successful

Your loved one may not seek to formalize the relationship if he was once married, and unsuccessfully. He just afraid that events will repeat themselves. In addition, the marriage of his parents can also influence his decision, if they constantly lived like a cat with a dog. Convince him that everything will be fine with you, because everything is fine with you now, and it will be even better. He has already made mistakes that led to the collapse of the relationship, but now he will not make these mistakes, and you will take care of it.

Does he want to stand up?

It is commendable that your loved one wants to first acquire his own apartment, get a job high paying job etc. However, there is one interesting fact what he needs to know from you. When a man and a woman just live together, they have no obligations, as if they lived in official marriage. But when a man is already married, he will constantly be faced with the need to acquire something extremely necessary, because he is obliged to support his family, and this need will drive him. Yes and merge your budgets into one as well as your ambitions, will play into your hands. But this will happen only when you are legal spouses.

Befriend his parents

In the life of a man, the mother is probably the most important and dear person, and therefore he is inclined to listen to her. Make friends with your partner's mom (and dad, of course) so that you can influence him through her later. Yes, she herself will persuade your boyfriend to marry, seeing that you are too valuable a girl for him to lose you.

Are you not married yet? So you don't have to act like you're his wife.

Perhaps the man does not propose marriage to you because does not see the need. You wash his clothes, cook all sorts of goodies for him, as if you have been married for years.. But you don't have to do all of that just yet, so do not make him understand what family life in an official marriage is and what advantages it has. In the meantime, he does not understand this, let him wash his own socks, and iron his shirts, etc.

How to get married? This question is very relevant for Russian girls. There are many books and tutorials on this topic. And if you set a goal - to find your prince and have a wedding, it is quite possible to do this. And if there is already that one and only beloved man, but he does not call for marriage and does not offer to move in with him either? What to do so that he decides and utters the cherished words?
With this question, I turned to a psychologist, a leading specialist in the field of family and interpersonal relationships, the author of about 30 books just on this topic, Anatoly Nekrasov.

Anatoly Alexandrovich, why do men hesitate to propose to their girls, although the relationship is good?

The question is very important and interesting. It is quite common today. This was not the case before. 100 years ago, this was not a question at all. Then men searched and sought women.
Now there is a revolution. It is also explained by such an objective fact that now there are more women than men. Not much, but still more. But that's not the point. And the main factor in the current situation, in which women are faced with the task of how to marry him, is that today our men are more feminine and less proactive and decisive than before. It is not in vain that the 20th century was called the century feminine men and courageous women. This continues into the 21st. Today we see that women are mostly in a masculine position, and men are in a relaxed state. Hence their inactivity. But this is not a cause, but a consequence. We need to understand: why now men are more feminine, and women are more masculine.

Why?

There is an explanation for this. Take, for example, war. Men fight, they are killed in in large numbers. Women are in the rear. And in all positions, in all positions, men are being replaced. They are at the machines, run collective farms, plow, sow, work. Women have become men and perform men's tasks. This went on for quite some time. Then it was necessary to restore the country. And the main difficulty again fell on the shoulders of women. A lot of men died, among the survivors there are many wounded, crippled. Many remained in the army because the Cold War continued. Women again had to be active. But it all started much earlier. After the revolution, when women were equated with men by decree. It seems that they raised the status of a woman, but it looked like this only on the surface. And in the depths there was a task - to double the number of workers. Before the revolution, men worked in all areas, and with very few exceptions, women. Agree, this is 50-60 percent of all work force. And here, at once, with one order, women become equal with men and can occupy any position. Women began to turn into work horses. And then the war, repression. That's how it happened that a Russian woman became so serious, a mother.
And since such a woman, she gives birth to the corresponding offspring. If she has more male energies, her inner man“extinguishes” the child he is carrying, and a more weakened boy comes into life. And the girls come out the other way around - stronger, with a strong-willed core. They are born like Athens: with a shield, a sword and a helmet.

That is, this is the main reason that men are feminine, do I understand correctly?

Yes. The girl looks at the guy, expects from him male deeds and he is not ready to be a man and not ready to be a father. He is still mentally immature.

So what are we girls supposed to do? How to revive the masculine principle in them?

The girl must first "give birth" to her man, then create a family with him and then give birth to a child from him. And more often we see this: she somehow gets married, quickly gives birth to a child. The one who is not a man at all cannot take responsibility and runs away. He's in shock. He is not yet a man, and they already want to make him a father.

To educate him himself! (smile).

You correctly said. To give birth to a man means to raise him. Now the question is: how to do it? It is better if two women take up the matter: his mother and girlfriend. But most often we see a different picture: the mother does not want to let go of her child, her son, she keeps him under her skirt. For her, the softer, calmer, the better. The main thing for her is that he be obedient, comfortable, convenient. Especially for a tough woman. So mothers-in-law, as a rule, are not assistants, with rare exceptions. Therefore, the girl gets even more difficult task- not only to help your man be born, but also to resist that maternal energy coming from the mother-in-law, which “spuds” him and keeps him in childish state. He is still a child for her. It is very difficult to resist these energies. She is still a mother. But tasks are always given according to strength. And the solutions are at great depth, that is, you need to go inside yourself and find answers to questions there. See: who am I? Am I not such an Amazon, too, with a sword and a shield? Maybe I'm also a fighting girlfriend? Then it is useless to fight with a powerful mother, whose shield is stronger and the sword is sharper. It is not known who will win. A man is more likely to take the side of his mother and rarely vice versa. It is useless to fight against two. Therefore, you need to understand: “if such a couple came to me - a weakly opened man (in psychology it is called mentally immature) and a courageous woman (his mother), then I didn’t just get into such a situation. The mother-in-law is my mirror in this issue“You have to be honest with yourself about this. Her degree of masculinity is my degree of masculinity. The only way that allows you to cope with this task is not to strengthen your masculinity, not to fight, not to fight, but, on the contrary, to become a superwoman.

That is, get your feminine?

Yes. Turn inward, to your feminine essence. The solution to the problem lies at the bottom. And as soon as you approached this point where you are a woman, you felt it and began to reveal it in yourself ... Everything changes. A man, even an immature man, instantly feels a woman, and he begins to open up and becomes a man, because femininity has sounded nearby.

And then he takes responsibility?

He understands that he is responsible, that he is the head, the master. And it starts to grow. And his mother will feel the same way. She also has a feminine side. At resonance with this feminine, the daughter-in-law and mother-in-law become friends. And you need to help the mother-in-law to become a woman. Through appropriate conversations, friendly relations, women's gifts. If she is not married, then help her get married, or at least tune in to it.
If such a courageous woman has a husband, then, as a rule, he is retracted. Help raise their relationship. We need to help that man become a Man.

How many tasks...

The task, in general, is one - to become a superwoman, and then all other tasks are solved easily and simply. If she turns to her feminine essence, then she will easily find her superwoman there. And if you don’t do this and live like everyone else, then you will get the corresponding result: problems, complicated relationship, divorces, etc.

But how to awaken femininity in yourself?

There are many on this subject different books. The only thing, in no case should you take a direction: a woman is a bitch. This is just the strengthening of masculinity in a woman, her strong-willed core. These women have no future. Yes, they can achieve something, but they will never really be happy. If now she “broke the bank”, then later she will definitely have problems. This is determined by the principles of the development of life. A woman must be a woman. This is her way, the meaning of life, her task. So reveal your femininity to the maximum. And this is softness, tenderness ... Tenderness is generally the key word for a woman. tender word, gentle look, gentle touch, gentle voice. You have to pay attention to everything and train, learn. Because too much has been taken from a tough mother, from society, and therefore tenderness must be nurtured.

Did I understand correctly: only by educating a woman in oneself can one achieve results?

Due to your love for yourself as a woman, revealing your feminine essence, love and respect for men as a species - these are the three components of cultivating femininity in yourself. If there is a man in a girl’s space whom she does not respect or has worse feelings, then this indicates her unfemininity. At womanly woman there are no men around whom she does not respect: they either disappear from her space or show the best masculine qualities.
That is, you need to have some wisdom in order to find a woman in yourself and be the kind of man you want to see?
You don't have to adjust. You have to be honest with yourself. If there are difficulties in life: I’m lonely or I can’t get married, or my beloved doesn’t become a man, then I’m not feminine enough. And ask the question: what is not quite feminine in me? The figure is cool, the face is beautiful. And the voice? Behavior? Movement? And so on. And tenderness, love, respect? Are there men in my space that I don't respect and love as men? Not as a person, but as a man! And very important question Q: How do I feel about my father? After all, a father for a girl is the first man in her life. And how she builds a relationship with him depends on her future life with men in general. "Father - cool man, I love you like a man" - that's what the motto should be. If this is not the case, it is difficult for her to become happy with men. And no matter what the father is, you need to understand why he is like that and love him. A relationship with a father is a golden key for a girl in her happy life. In the book "Kin, Family, Man" I give a very good answer to this important question.

And if a man does not dare to propose because he does not have a family model, is this something incomprehensible to him, because he was raised by one mother? Now there are many such examples when women raise children alone. How then to be?

This is a common situation. Images happy family not many people have. Where can I get it? We have several generations brought up in families without understanding the meaning of the family, its meaning, role, etc. Without an appropriate family image. In general, there are less than 5% of happy families in our country. Agree, against this background it is difficult to have a positive experience. How to be? Now is a wonderful time. There is knowledge that allows you to form this image. For a girl, you first need to understand what a family is. You need to be a professional family matters. First, see, understand and put together the image of the family in your head. There is an ancient wisdom: "As we think, so we live." If there is an image of a happy family in the head, then it will come true, if it is not there, then there will be only separate fragments of happiness, the rest will be misfortune. To do this, you just need to go through an educational program in family matters. And now there is such an opportunity. In particular, my book “Designing a Family” very briefly, concisely, in an understandable simple language explains all the issues of the family, its construction and helps to create an image of a family, which is then realized. And when a girl put this knowledge into herself, understood, figured it out, then she can start communicating with a man on this topic, she can easily help him see and understand this image of a family.

That is, a man needs to be shown how great it is to live in a family?

First, understand yourself: what a family is and what it is based on, and then help a man acquire this image. Either he will read the book himself, or she will pass it on to him in conversations. In general, by and large, a man should be more advanced in this knowledge.

And if a girl just sit down with a man and frankly ask about what does not suit him, what does he want to see her?

You can also go this way. Usually psychologists are sent to him, thus providing himself with a job for the rest of his life. The path of negotiations can exist, but there must be another basis: “I am a woman, I begin to develop as a woman, and as I open up, I communicate with him as a woman with a man” - and he begins to grow, develop as a man. If we go this way, then we can discuss these issues. And if you just ask in the forehead: “Come on tell me - what are you dissatisfied with?” He will answer: “Yes, everything is cool, everything is super.” It's like with a child, with a teenager it is impossible to agree. That is, you agreed today, and tomorrow he asks: “What are you talking about?”. The child cannot solve adult problems. It must be understood that if an immature man is nearby, then nothing can be solved through simple negotiations. Only through negotiation, in which the woman starts to sound like a woman, more and more strongly. Then in this process of talking, everyday situations, joint travels, trips, sex, she gives him her female state and he's under these feminine energies starts to open up like a man. This is the essence of the process: if there is a woman, then a man will definitely appear nearby. If there is a superwoman, there is bound to be a superman. Either this one will open, or it will disappear, and the one that corresponds to it will appear.

Or maybe a woman, having embarked on the path of searching for her femininity, turn to a man for help to help her become a woman?

Yes, but it needs to be done wisely, cunningly, like a woman: “Honey, help me become a woman. Show me the image of a real man, and I will be a woman. And join the game, where he also plays the role of a man.

Then he will be able to move from the state of a child during the game into the role of a man?

For example, now many people travel abroad. What for? Warm up your belly on the beach, look at some regular ruins, take pictures of different species, but you need to go with a sense. For example, "dear, let's do this, go on this trip, where we will play such roles with you - for example, you are a count, and I am a countess." Down to the smallest detail, how we communicate, eat, etc. All on high level femininity and masculinity of the XIX century, when there was an apotheosis of these two concepts. You can think of something else. You are a superman, macho, and I am ... And through such communication, a wise game, you can do a lot of things.

And how can a man understand that this is his one and only, that this is SHE?

When he realizes that there is a woman in front of him, then for the sake of the woman he will walk on the ceiling. There are so few women now, mostly “horses”. You can stay with her for a while, ride her, have sex, but it’s still not interesting to live with her. Thank you for the conversation. I wish all girls to have happy family.

All girls, women dream of beautiful and crazy love, and from the very beginning. early childhood. But not everyone manages to realize their ideas, turning them into reality. More and more women are asking about this issue. . Of course, happy marriage- this is the marriage where a woman feels support, protection.

Patience. As they say experienced psychologists, women should never show by their behavior that they are dreaming and waiting, they can’t wait for a wedding. This is because men, as a rule, always do the opposite. Therefore, do not try to hint to your loved one about the topic of marriage, because at one point he will get tired of all this, and he will want to break it off.

Each man must independently make such a serious decision so that in the future he does not reproach you for the fact that it was you who forced him to marry. All men should know, understand that such an act really depends solely on him.

Women's beauty. Certainly, appearance important role. This means that you need to follow, take care of yourself, looking impressive and attractive. After all, then a man will be able to understand that he has the most beautiful and attractive woman, respectively, he does not wish to leave her in order to brag to other men. If you manage to show a man that men are still looking at you, that will be good.

Thus, a man begins to think about how to make your life fabulous, because in which case, there are many caring applicants, handsome men which will do the same. Starting to scroll through this in their heads, men, as a rule, immediately want to legitimize the relationship so as not to lose their beloved, so you should not ignore this valuable advice.

Common interests. A good wife is one who perfectly understands and tries to accept all the hobbies of her beloved man. Sometimes women are not very serious about the hobbies of men. Thus, this leads to various quarrels, scandals, and if you look at them better, you can see how you yourself begin to get involved.

For example, if your lover loves football, then you should definitely visit Soccer game Believe me, he will definitely appreciate it. In addition, you can be there when your loved one is doing car repairs, even if you don't like it. Keep in mind that a common interest will always strengthen relationships between loving people.

Delicious homemade food. To find the answer to your question, you need to start pampering your man with tasty and favorite food. After all, men love to eat deliciously, so if the betrothed sees that you cook well, then he will have a desire to legitimize your relationship, you can be sure.

No one denies that really restaurant food is delicious, but again, it is important to pamper a man at least occasionally with homemade food that you cook yourself.

Often many women do not understand why their men do not want to get married, what they are doing wrong. Perhaps the reason is that women often scold their men for failures, which is undesirable.

Remember that there is no such person who would like to be constantly scolded, "dripped on the brain." So, you need to understand, never try to talk about what you don’t like in your man openly, frankly, as many women often do.

Try to make the man want to change for you on his own. Thus, he will assume that everything happened strictly on his initiative.

We can safely say that every woman loves to be complimented, they want to hear them all the time. And do not assume that men do not like this, this rule effectively affects men. This means that you should praise the man you love, constantly claiming that he is the best.

Remember that everyone loves praise, so men are no exception. Thus, a man will begin to understand that his beloved values ​​his feelings, him in general, and this is important.

Often women ask their friends for advice, forgetting that they have a loved one who should be told about all the problems and failures.

So don't forget in without fail it is worth asking the advice of your loved one, remember this. After all, when he begins to feel your helplessness, he becomes courageous, strong, feeling this, thereby making every effort not to offend his beloved.

Even if a man said something wrong in relation to you, then you should not immediately scold him, shout, because it is best to remain silent, but do it your own way. So you can save the relationship, but this is the most important thing.

You can't control him. All women know and understand that there are no men who would not love freedom. After all, there is no such man who would like to spend his life with a woman who constantly controls him, since sooner or later it will start very strongly.

All this means only that you should always leave your beloved personal, you should not be jealous of everyone, constantly climb into the soul. If you carefully listen to such elementary advice, then you will definitely be able to find out how, without special difficulties and problems, so be sure to consider this.

Attention: It should be noted that the most important important quality in the relationship of the sexes there is always love. This means that you need to be aware that if it is not in the hearts of partners, then naturally it will not work to create a family, there is no need to think about procreation.

My betrothed mummer

Often, many women forget that men really love sex, which means that women should love it no less, of course, dreaming and wanting to create and maintain a family.

All this means only that a woman must make every effort and measure to become for her chosen one. perfect mistress so that he doesn’t even have thoughts of cheating on you, going to another woman. Therefore, you need to try to make him feel good next to you. Do not forget that men prefer experiments in sex.

Cleanliness and order in the house. A woman should always monitor the comfort in the house, as many men like to return home after work to where there is a relaxing atmosphere, comfort and cleanliness. Naturally, a man will rush home, knowing exactly what awaits him. loving wife, hot dinner, and this is the most important thing.

Offspring. You can often hear that many women do not like children. Remember that this is often the main reason that men do not want to marry, because they want offspring. Therefore, in any case, women should love children, and not only their own, but everyone, your chosen one should feel it.

You shouldn't complain. If you don’t know, then I would like to note that men can’t stand it when women constantly complain about their lives, they always whine.

Remember that men also have problems, but sometimes they cannot talk about them, even loving wife, so it will be nice if you do not “pour” a ton of problems and complaints on them.

If you always stay in good mood, moreover, you, it turns out, raise it to your man, then you know, it is unlikely that anyone will want to leave such a woman.

Indeed, during a hard working day, every man is subjected to serious stress, he worries too much, is nervous, there are only dissatisfied faces around. Thus, returning home, he wants to observe the atmosphere of peace and quiet fun, you should definitely take note. If a man is greeted at home with a smile, then this is the most important thing.

Of course, in some cases this method can be dangerous, but still, it works well for men. If you get a fictitious lover, then this will surely annoy your chosen one well.

As a result, a man begins to be constantly jealous, thinking up various stories for himself, respectively, he will wish to assert his right to you, and as a rule, the only way which will allow you to do this, is marriage.

Of course, no one forces you to cheat on your loved one for real, since in this case you can completely forget about marriage.

Choose the right man

As a rule, often women themselves are to blame for the fact that they are still not married. This is due to the fact that they choose far from the men they dreamed of from early childhood.

To avoid such a mistake, try to date only those men who are really ready for marriage, and believe that there are many of them.

Here you need to act simple principle- no need to bang your head closed door, because there is an open one nearby, consider and be sure to take note of this. The most ideal are those men who themselves want to marry, because they don’t need to be influenced at all, they will independently choose a convenient moment, after which they will give a ring.

According to psychics, there are some rituals that allow you to legitimize relationships with a man.

Of course, most women do not believe in them, but still, there are those who are ready for anything, just not to lose a loved one.

For example, if you are in long term relationship, thereby wanting to marry a loved one, he, in turn, is in no hurry to propose to you, then you will need to use one ritual that may help solve this problem.

The essence of the ritual is that you need to wash your face every morning for three months in a row. special water. To do this, you need to take a basin, draw water into it, drip seven drops rose oil, and read the corresponding plot, which the specialist will tell you about.

Be active. If you don’t have a friend at all, a fan, think about why this is happening. Maybe you think that you will meet your husband by going out in the evening to throw out the garbage? Of course it's possible, but it's rare. Be active. Tell all your girlfriends that you want to meet a man.

If a mother offers to meet the son of her classmate, do not refuse, perhaps this man is yours. future husband. No one is forcing you to date him.

Go to the cinema together, in a cafe. Meet again, for one date it is hardly possible to understand something. If this option does not suit you, go somewhere else. After that, do not run immediately home, look around.

Feel free to be the first to approach the man you like, he does not bite, maybe he will be very pleased. Do not forget that men at the present time are very cowardly, they are afraid of rejection, and therefore they do not fit themselves.

There are few men, and they know their worth, so they show off. Remember the phrase from the movie "The most charming and attractive" — "Don't be born beautiful - be born active".

Take action! And you will succeed. At present, it’s really possible to get acquainted via the Internet, just be careful, make an appointment in a crowded place, go home after a date by taxi, you never know what kind of person. First take a closer look, and then call home.

Men need women who drink and are ready for anything only once, for the evening, I think you have a different goal. Look at yourself from the outside, evaluate your makeup.

Some women at 30 paint their face the same way as at 18, out of habit. It looks stupid. Go to a make-up artist, consult, the same applies to clothing. Don't think what less clothes, all the better.

Men like to speculate what is hidden under our clothes, it excites them more than outright nudity.

Evaluate your intellect, if you think that it needs to be developed, then do not postpone development indefinitely. Sign up for courses, get an education. Men say they don't love smart women but they choose to be their wives.

If you fall in love with a man and want to marry him immediately, then immediately call to action the mind, not the heart. Marriages made as a result of passion are usually short-lived, it is better to take a sober look at the future husband, take a closer look at how he treats his mother. What are your family relationships? young man. How does he feel about work, does he read books. Then draw your own conclusions.

In no case do not show a man that you really want to get married, you will achieve the exact opposite effect. Better let him think that you are not in a hurry to get married, that you have not decided anything for yourself yet. Then the man begins, like a real hunter, to set traps for his victim, that is, he wants to marry you.

The man is a hunter

Women, marry men who truly love you. Even if he loves you more than you love him, that's even better. It is worse when a woman loves, and a man allows himself to be loved. Do not forget that a man is a hunter.

Feel free to accept gifts from a man, exploit his work. Invite you to dig the ground at your parents' dacha. When a man invests in a woman, it is already more difficult for him to part with her, he has to get married.

There is nothing more stupid when a woman openly imposes herself, offers herself. Consider yourself a prize, a gift for a man, let him deserve such a gift first!

Every man wants to see a queen next to him, so become her. Even worse, in my opinion, is blackmailing a man with a pregnancy. Of course it is effective way, but will it justify itself in the future. You can't usually keep a man by your side as a child.

If a man requires you to quit school, forget all your girlfriends, stop going to work, controls your every step, seriously think about it.

A loving man will not demand this from his beloved. And yours desire marrying someone quickly can be a tragedy in the future. The same goes for drunkenness.

If your man allows himself to drink too much in your presence, comes to your house tipsy and all this happens all the time, also think about it, maybe you have a potential alcoholic in front of you. Some women presumptuously think that by marrying you, he will immediately become good. Believe me, after 12 years it is almost impossible to change a person.

Scoundrel

Do not place high hopes on handsome men, jokers and charming varmints. For some reason, women love scoundrels, and then they complain that life did not work out.

Look around, there are probably a lot of ordinary guys around you: hard-working, simple, good. Let them seem pale against the background of handsome men and jokers, but they make the best fathers and husbands, oddly enough.

If married in this moment no one takes, think, maybe your hour has not come yet? Not the fact that you need to get married as soon as possible. Strive not for quantity, but for quality.

Children can be born at the age of thirty and even at forty, our medicine allows us to do this. It's better to marry later worthy person than before, but for the bad. Good luck and long family happiness!

Conclusion

Remember that all these tips are really vital, if you carefully delve into them, study them, you can always achieve a good result. Every woman who dreams of getting married should clearly understand that only desire, and compliance with such elementary rules, will achieve the desired result.

Now you know how to get married successfully and for a long time, all that remains to be done is to start following all the tips that have been said. Many women often believe that they are perfect, but perfect people do not exist.

You always need to remember that each person has their own advantages and disadvantages, so try to understand this, because only then will you be able to win the heart loving man who doesn't want to lose you. After all, if a man values ​​\u200b\u200bhis love, then he will definitely legitimize his relationship, you can be sure of that.

Try to be guided by all these tips, then you will be able to save the relationship, but also, of course, realize your cherished dream- become happy wife, give birth to children from a long-awaited and loving man, and this is real happiness.

In a girl's life, it often happens that she has been dating a young man for a long time who is helpful, caring, attentive and gentle. The young lady, of course, is convinced that she will create a strong and happy family with her beloved. But time goes by, and he doesn’t even stutter about the wedding. The girl starts to run. She already doubts that the young man is serious, and not just spending leisure time with her because there are no others yet. But you don't want to lose your boyfriend! And she no longer knows how to behave further. How should she be? How to marry a beloved young man when he does not call and does not offer to live together? To begin with, we will determine the reasons for this behavior of a person.

Why doesn't a guy in a long-term relationship call for marriage?

Yes, until quite recently the privilege of making an offer belonged to stronger sex, whose representatives considered it normal to find their beloved and seek her consent to marriage. Today the situation is somewhat different. Now a guy can be with us for several months or even years, take care of us diligently, get to know all relatives and friends, but not even hint at marriage. And we so dream of marrying a loved one! However, his behavior suggests the thought - but are we being led by the nose? Perhaps the young man is looking for a more suitable party for himself? Or is he not proposing yet for some other reason?

In general, a guy may not propose to a girl for a long time for various reasons. Of course, it is possible that he really wants to find himself a more suitable life partner. But, if you think about it, it's unlikely. It is unlikely that a young man will strain and waste time on one that he does not consider worthy of becoming his wife. Besides, he puts in so much effort to please her! Usually men do not behave this way towards a young lady if she is not dear to them.

A young man can pull with a marriage proposal in anticipation of improving his financial situation. This is a fairly common reason that guys are in no hurry to marry their beloved. And one of their biggest misconceptions. Because you can earn money already having a family. And doing it even more successfully than using complete freedom. The family encourages you to move forward. And freedom is somewhat chilling.

Another reason why it’s impossible to marry a loved one (because the guy doesn’t even talk about the registry office) is his parents. Even if they treat the girl well, the father and mother can insist that the son first learn, get on his feet firmly, and only then start a family. Or secretly dream that he will find a more suitable match for himself. Or even be against Serious relationships beloved child of the opposite sex. One way or another, but if a young man avoids talking about a wedding because of the instructions of his parents, the young lady needs to think about it. In all likelihood, the gentleman is infantile and is unlikely to subsequently become a reliable support for the family.

Everything that we just talked about is quite common and really is an ordinary explanation for the fact that a guy does not offer a girl to marry him for a long time. However, the main reason for the occurrence similar situation yet it serves something else. Today, male representatives have become less decisive than many years ago in dealing with the weaker half of the human race. I must say that this issue is quite relevant and very painful. Therefore, we will now talk about it in more detail.

Reasons for the indecision of guys in a relationship: what to do with them?

Actually, the fair sex itself is to blame for the fact that young people often do not dare to propose even to their beloved girl. It was we who once caught fire with the desire to occupy men's positions, thereby giving men the opportunity to relax and stay in front of us in a timid state. No, but what, pray tell, should they do when women independently and willingly took responsibility for solving very serious issues? We did not just take, we fiercely insist on such a right, thus winning back our independence.

The idea that the most successful in all respects are women with a tough character is being promoted everywhere. The image of a bitch is promoted by a variety of sources. And the girls, willingly or involuntarily, copy its main features. Such features are assertiveness, rigidity, authoritativeness, conviction in the rightness, independence. These are qualities of character characteristic of a man, and not female type personality. And what happens? And it turns out that we practically consciously cultivate the masculine essence in ourselves, while suppressing the feminine.

So it turns out that the guy next to such a girl feels out of place. Still would! After all, next to him is a delightful creation of the weaker sex with the manners of the stronger sex. There is something to be lost! It seems to be a real man must be for a woman reliable protection and support capable of taking responsibility for decisions taken. But the solutions are this case takes predominantly the representative of the weaker sex! She accepts and follows them herself. This means that she does not particularly need the protection and help of a man.

a man, if he true man, it is necessary to realize that in relations with the fair sex, the leader and patron is he. If a girl constantly suppresses the will of her life partner, she, as it were, stubbornly hints that the development of relationships in a couple depends only on her. And at the same time, she expects from him a decisive act in the form of a marriage proposal. Well, isn't it a paradox? First, take away from a man the right to decide the fate of relationships, and then wait from him for actions that are peculiar only to the manager of this fate. Yes, there will be no such actions, because used to be a girl let her boyfriend know that she is the one who decides how they live on.

No, in general, when a woman is independent, it's not bad. Complete lack of independence sometimes, of course, causes emotion in men and a desire to take a girl under their care. However, more often than not, over time, it begins to annoy and burden. Because good, high-quality relationships are not built only on the desire of one partner to babysit the other. They need common interests, spiritual unity, inner feeling support from your soul mate. A weak-willed person is not able to ensure the presence of such factors in communication. He needs constant guardianship, which in marriage sooner or later begins to bother.

Therefore, girls, of course, should try to be individuals who are ready to make serious decisions. That's just in a relationship with a loved one in this matter, you should not go too far. Otherwise, we will wait a very long time for him to offer to start a family. And, as a result, we can not wait at all. The guy will simply conclude that we do not need him, and will go looking for the one next to whom he will feel like a man, a patron. And not subjects at the throne of the queen. Perhaps he will not be happy with her and will never forget us. But who benefits from this?

So what if the girl really has such qualities as dominance, assertiveness, militancy? How to marry a beloved man who is alarmed by such qualities? Break yourself or take the bull by the horns on your own and drag it to the registry office? Neither one nor the other in this case is undesirable. A complete alteration of personality can be fatal, destructive for her. As a result, the guy will get a wife not at all the one he was in love with. The consequence of such a metamorphosis will be disappointment and a feeling that he has been circled around his finger. And, of course, you can drag the bull by the horns to the registry office. However, in the future, he will either calmly stand in the stall and wait for feeding, or he will begin to beat his hoof for any reason and do what he pleases. Is this what we expect from family relationships?

The only way out of the situation for the girl is to show her feminine side in communication with the chosen one. That is, to be gentle, soft, friendly, understanding with him. Let the beloved feel that we trust him and hope for him in resolving all issues. Let femininity speak in full voice, requiring protection and patronage. And then the young man will feel his male power and will definitely make an offer.

How to get married is the eternal question that always worries women. It seems sometimes, what a pity that those times have passed when your parents and family decided your fate for you! After all, it was on their heads that the whole burden of responsibility, search, lay down. However, those days are long gone, and even the times of knights and cavaliers, who once were ready to go around half the world in search of that one that was intended only for him alone, have passed! No, today a woman must not only find a life partner herself, but also be able to win him. The role of today's cavalier is played precisely modern woman ready to do anything to find a husband.

We decided to build our article on the experience of other women - those who are the antipodes of our heroines, those who, instead of the problem "How and where to find a loved one?" have the problem "How to get rid of it?". So, after analyzing these data, we came to the following general provisions which our female hunters should take as a rule.

So, how to find a future husband and marry him?

If you want to have a happy marriage, then you must adhere to the following rules:

1. First, the hunter is by nature a man. So give him this role. Let him get you. Your task is to let him think so, so that he enjoys this process. Pretend that marriage is not your element, that this is not what you want. Constantly force you to seek you, then the man himself will come to the conclusion that only through the golden ring can he achieve you. The main thing in this business is not to overdo it. Do not overdo it, otherwise the man will really think that you do not need it, and not without pleasure will shirk duties.
2. Secondly, you need to make him think that although he is the only one, it may not be for long. Some women give their men a reason for jealousy with some fictitious relationship, they think up other novels. We do not recommend doing it so openly, but you can create an aura of mystery around you. Just let the man think that he might not be your only fan. To do this is quite simple. Don't answer his calls right away. Give him a reason to worry, why doesn't she pick up the phone? What could she possibly be doing? Every fourth time, cancel a date, maybe even before the meeting itself. Be late from time to time without giving explanations about the reason for being late. Let a man understand that you need him, but somehow you are still free woman and do not have to go into lengthy explanations of what and why. After all, everything can change someday, both feelings and the object of sighing.
3. Thirdly, sometimes it is useful to talk frankly with your man. If you live together for quite a long time, you can embellish that your relatives are starting to put pressure on you, that this situation is also a little annoying for you, and you have such a situation at work. Family status generally not welcome. So it would be nice (since we're together anyway) to legitimize this relationship somehow. Perhaps your chosen one himself thought about this more than once, but due to natural laziness or fear of failure, he did not dare to take a decisive step. And this conversation, one way or another, will lead you to some common denominator.
4. Fourth, give a man a reason to think that you - weak woman, and he is your hero, a man who can handle any task (even the most insignificant one). If the object of your sigh works with you in the same office, come to him more often under the pretext of fixing the printer, the rod in the pen does not work, the phone is junk. This will make him feel that he is needed by someone. In addition, he will think that he is a hero - not only in his own eyes, but also in the eyes of the fair sex. Sooner or later, he will realize that he looks especially heroic in your company and wants to remain so until the end of his days. Let him think so, do not rush to dissuade him from this.
5. Fifth, there is nothing wrong with embellishing reality a bit. Under some serious pretext, you can sneak into your betrothed's bachelor lair for quite some time. long term, and only then under some equally serious reason and push it for more decisive action. Approximate situation: your parents kicked you out of the house due to your periodic absence from home at night (at this time you spend the night with him). He invites you to live with him, and then everyone understands perfectly well that it is necessary to make peace with your parents, but they are so conservative in their views that you see no other way out than to register your relationship. After all, he is somehow to blame for this situation, so let him solve this problem like a real man! And the best thing about this situation is that you don't have to bring your relatives up to date. You can simply either tell them the truth, or say that you will stay with a friend (go on a business trip, to a conference, and so on).
6. Sixth, you need to choose the right target. In choosing a life partner, focus on men who, in fact, have nothing against marriage. Forget about those who are initially set to create a family categorically against it. They are not worth your efforts and you, because there are a lot of men around who are worthy of your attention and time. In addition, in no case should you choose a married man as a target - such an object is lost to you forever. Of course, you can console yourself with the thought that he will definitely get together and definitely divorce his current wife in order to make you happy, because there are already so many cases when this happened in real life. Only if you calculate in percentage terms, then there are only three or four real hopes for 100 cases. Are you ready to be on the list of losers and only waste your precious time on it? So it’s better not to initially get involved in such an intrigue and run away from married man the further the better. If he entered into an intrigue with you, and you have been dating for a long time, think about the fact that he has been deceiving his wife for quite a long time, which means that he can quite easily deceive you for quite a long time with his promises. So you can't be fooled about this.