The difference in the thinking of a man and a woman. What do women think? Features of behavior in relationships

In the tournament female logic the random number generator won.
Joke

Before proceeding with practical advice, I want to tell you about my perception of women.
I know I know. Every woman is unique and inimitable. But several years of studying female psychology and communicating with women led me to the conclusion that these words apply to anything, but not to communication with men. In this area, women have much more similarities than differences. First, let's discuss what they have in common, and then dwell on the differences.
For most men, women are like Chinese puzzles - for the most part, female behavior seems to them absolutely illogical and meaningless. And I think you've noticed that most women THINK differently than most men, and WANT something that is different from what most men want. Many men repeatedly see with their own eyes confirmation of this, but very few think about it and draw conclusions. But, in fact, the sooner you realize what is happening around, the sooner you will achieve success in communicating with women.
Have you ever paid attention to how women talk with each other? This usually happens according to the following scheme:
& nbsp 1. Discussion of what happened or what they saw.
& nbsp 2. Discussion of how they feel about this.
& nbsp 3. Abrupt transition on another topic, some detail related to the previous one.
& nbsp 4. Return to point 1.
Most men will find the focus of such a conversation completely meaningless. Amazing right?
Have you ever wondered which entertainment is preferred by women and which by men? Women buy fashion magazines, watch soap operas, and read romance novels. Men buy Playboy, watch football and read newspapers. Just think about it carefully. What do a fashion magazine have in common soap opera and love story? Why don't most men understand what could be interesting about these things? Why do men feel that women's conversations with each other are devoid of meaning and direction? Why do men want sex more and women want long-term relationships more? Why do men act as takers and women as givers? It's very simple. This is because a woman’s brain is not designed like a man’s. That's all. This is what lies on the surface. Do you want to know the root causes of these differences in thinking between women and men? Then the following paragraphs are written for you.
It is unlikely that it will be a secret for you that both men and women enter into intimate relationship under the rule of one of the strongest instincts - the instinct of procreation. Moreover, women need men as much as we need women. And believe me, they love sex as much as we do. But only psychological attitude To intimacy completely different: a man is usually obsessed exclusively with the need for bodily contact with a partner, and for most women this need is accompanied by a subconscious attitude to sexual intercourse as to the process of conceiving a child. That is, as a rule, for him, sexual intercourse is just an insignificant, but very pleasant, event on his way, and for her it is inner urge to see a man next to you in the role of the father of her future children.

Both men and women, as if assuming themselves to be carriers of unique genes, strive to leave behind offspring endowed with these genes. But if for a man the best guarantee that his offspring will walk the planet is the maximum possible number sexual contacts with different women, then for a woman such a guarantee can only be provided by a long-term physical proximity with one partner she considers the MOST WORTHY candidate. Therefore, for her, sexual intercourse is an event MUCH LARGE SCALE than for him. This is what it consists in main difference and main reason all the actions of women in relation to men, which introduce the latter into confusion, bewilderment and even anger. Understand: they do all this because they are driven by the desire to start and continue a new life. Here the notorious female logic also originates: it is necessary to provide oneself and one's child with the benefits of life, and physical competition with men is practically impossible. I will not expand on this topic in more detail - this is material for sites of a slightly different focus. But it is important that you think about these things so as not to be offended, not to get angry, not to lose your temper every time you do not understand female behavior.
A few more words about female logic. Scientifically proven that, on average, women have more developed right hemisphere the brain, and in men - the left. And, apparently, it is this difference that makes mutual understanding between the sexes so difficult. But I want to bring to your attention my own abstract concept of structure female brain which I call the "Double Brain" concept. It's pretty straightforward. Imagine that women have two brains: FRONT and BACK. One of them is a "guardian" who protects a woman from "danger". It is he who prompts her to say "Let's stay friends" or "This is too fast for me" or "Today I just want to talk." This is the forebrain, which is responsible for speech. And most of the time, you can ignore what he says. The other brain is located "behind" the forebrain. He controls body movements, facial expressions, looks, the desire to touch a man. This is the brain that you want to reach and which will prevail during sex (the "front" brain will be forced to shut up and give in at this moment).
This concept may seem primitive to you, but it surprisingly accurately reflects real situation of things. For example, when you talk to a woman, both brains listen to you (unless the woman is drunk, in which case the forebrain is asleep). The hindbrain craves pleasure and fun, while the forebrain forms the woman's speech, constrains her, does not allow her to relax. When a woman says “No” or “Let's stay friends,” often the hindbrain can think and act in a completely different way. You will see it in her burning eyes, in her excitement, in her reddened skin, in her uncertain, aching intonation, in her slightly parted lips, etc. Therefore, when you communicate with a woman, follow NOT HER WORDS, BUT HER BODY LANGUAGE. You will learn more about it in the article "

It has long been not news that male and female psychology have certain differences. This is due, first of all, to physiological characteristics and social roles formed during centuries-old history society. So, for example, on emotional condition and behavior, hormones have a great influence, which induce us to sentimentality, aggression, determination and other manifestations of character.

In practice, the study of the characteristics of the psychology of the opposite sex makes it possible to simplify the process of finding a life partner, as well as to build strong family relationships. However, many perceive this area of ​​knowledge as an opportunity to manipulate another person, which is fundamentally wrong and rarely brings positive results for both sides.

Male perception of women in general

Long time women and men were brought up not only according to different canons, but sometimes in different educational institutions... It worked out in men a certain attitude To opposite sex, as a weak and defenseless creature, retaining their position as a defender and leader in any relationship. Therefore, even despite understanding contemporary manifestations feminism and equality, a woman who has become on an equal footing with a man is rarely perceived by the latter as a representative of the opposite sex. There is nothing reprehensible in this, because, fulfilling the role of protector and breadwinner, he subconsciously realizes the function of a man inherent in him.

By the way, a big role in this circumstance is played by the woman's demeanor, as well. After all, it is not without reason that they say that a man loves with his eyes. So, for example, a woman in a dress calls out a completely different perception than she does in trousers.

Continuing the theme of the role of instincts in understanding male psychology, it is worth paying attention to the priority leadership qualities, which are inherent in the representatives of the stronger sex by nature itself. This fact determines the approval and admiration of his physical and personal virtues, actions, etc. the right channel... This applies not only to relationships with partners, but also to the interaction of opposite sexes in general. A prime example it serves special attitude boys to their mothers.

Features of behavior in relationships

If we talk about the relationship between the sexes, it is based not only on the above principles. First of all, it is necessary to take into account that a man, being a hunter, is used to thinking strategically, highlighting the optimal goal that he can achieve. Of course, this does not prevent them from striking up relationships with affordable young ladies and dreaming of an affair with Miss World, but if it comes to marriage and serious relationship, then he will always choose the best of those whom he can conquer. And this means that a lady needs not only to be at her best, but sometimes to descend from her pedestal in order to give him a chance to show his best qualities.

Video. What are the torments afraid of?

In addition, it should be remembered that male psychology- this is the psychology of the owner. It proceeds from a natural need for the continuation of its own kind. At the same time, if a woman, feeling rivalry, expresses only her own complexes, then a man is subconsciously afraid of raising someone else's heir, sometimes showing excessive jealousy.

Unlike women, who historically had to go through a solid path of socialization, male psychology is less likely to be subject to such manifestations as cunning and deception. Straightforwardness and openness are especially characteristic for young boys. This quality is highly valued by men in relations with others, and therefore, if you want to earn his respect in marriage or relationships, in no case it is unnecessary to use lies or hypocrisy.

General psychology in the family

Speaking about the psychology of men, it is also necessary to take into account general psychological qualities personality. So, for example, men extroverts treat marriage and women as a way of self-affirmation in society, which means that the higher it is social status, the higher the requirements for a companion in relation to appearance and demeanor, in case of discrepancy of which, he will subconsciously look for a more suitable passion.

In turn, introverted men, as a rule, hide their ambitions and are used to looking for loyalty and care in a woman, relegating external qualities to the background. At the same time, very often they transfer the rights of government in the family to the woman.

Both those and others may not be very good, since the main thing is this issue- learn how to properly distribute leadership roles in family relationships.

Undoubtedly, men and women are very different from each other in physical strength, brain activity, emotions ... And these differences are not only on the genetic foundation, but also in socio-historical development. For a long time, men and women had different rights, various social roles and the postulates of responsibility.

What's the difference?

Let's take a look at the main differences between a man and a woman.

Thinking process... Women always think concretely, with all the details and details, and often use intuition in this matter. And men, on the contrary, think logically and rationally, abstractly and spatially. At the same time, the weaker sex devotes his thoughts to family and relationships with relatives, and the strong one often thinks about career, self-realization and work. Therefore, you should not quarrel because the husband talks about work, and the wife suddenly decides to go for a ride and visit relatives.

Interests. Women are most interested in love, relationships between people, communication and mutual understanding. And men are fond of rivalry, leadership and the opportunity to show their abilities. That is why men love football and hockey so much, and women can endlessly watch melodramas, even if they all look alike.

Capabilities . Have fair half mankind has developed verbal abilities, and a strong one has analytical ones. It is not surprising that women are very fond of chatting with their girlfriends on the phone, while men prefer to get news from newspapers and the Internet.

Critical situations... Since women's thinking is focused on details, it cannot take it like this and quickly react in critical situations... It slows down. But the man quickly reacts to the event and instantly mobilizes, ready to solve all the problems here and now. That is why a man can quickly fall in love and quickly cool down when a woman needs long courtship, and after parting, she cannot cool her feelings for a long time.

Mind . A man thinks and seeks a solution himself, and this is called the mind. A woman tries to minimum costs get the same result, and this is called trickery. The weaker sex prefers not to use his mind so often, but this does not mean that he is more stupid than the strong half of humanity.

Communication . Man and woman behave differently in the new team. If a woman devotes more time to strengthening her ties and building relationships, then a man will do everything to just be the first in this team.

Are male and female thinking differently?
I asked one smart man: "What is the difference between women and male thinking? "He replied:" Nothing. "However, I do not understand much that is understandable to men, and, accordingly, they do not understand much that is understandable to me. Some things women grasp better, some things are better understood by men. When I need to explain something man, I just need to show him a clear causal relationship.When I explain something to a woman, I make her feel that from some actions someone is bad, but from some good.
However, this is not news under the moon. Men are more logical than women. Women are more emotional than men. However, the news is that everyone, except for show business, is indifferent. Showbiz knows what will make a woman feel emotional. And if a woman laughs or cries, then a man will sit next to her, because this is his woman. No, I believe that some men understand art and understand it, but show business is for the masses. And the masses of the audience are made up of women.
All teaching, medicine, construction, and even psychology was created by men for men. Women, it seems, were not allowed to do anything serious that determines their lives. On the other hand, women did not even take up men's affairs. And if they did, then they did them like a woman, which was not perceived by men. So, what is the difference between feminine and masculine thinking?

The thoughts of our ancestors.
Let's look at a few tens of millennia ago, when the cornerstone differences were laid in the consciousness of women and men. Let's take a look into the cave of a primitive man. What was the man thinking? How to kill a mammoth, then tell about it by the fire, and then lie down with a woman to rest.
What was the woman thinking? About whether there will be enough roots before the new harvest, about how to hide the last piece of meat in order to give it to children, about the fact that their youngest daughter, who has already grown up, cannot sleep next to her man, this is already a taboo, about how how to talk to a shaman woman, so that she speaks with a shaman, so that he speaks with her man, so that he lets another man into their cave for eldest daughter, about what a woman from another tribe told her, what a woman from a tribe across the stream told her, what a forest tribe woman told her that after the rains a completely foreign tribe would come and kill men, and take the women for itself. It will be necessary to ask the men of their tribes together to meet this completely alien tribe. If the men refuse to unite, they must go to the mountains. There is another method, to declare a taboo on hugging until the man agrees. Only it is necessary to discuss this with the women of neighboring tribes, but for now it is necessary to collect the necessary grass on this moonlit night, and tomorrow try to dye your hair with the bark of that tree that the woman of the main hunter is for her.

What is the difference in thinking between a man and a woman?
A man's thinking is more purposeful, he sees, hears, feels the goal. If he is planning to kill a mammoth, he will draw it, discuss it with other hunters and dance an old hunting dance, and in the evening he will prepare a spear. In a woman, thinking is less purposeful, it covers the general environment. While the man prepares for the hunt, the woman feeds the children, teaches them, watches the fire, sews skins, gossips with other women, collects medicinal herbs, performs magic rites, prepares food, cleans the cave, decorates himself with beads, etc. more goals. If a woman were more focused and dedicated to one goal, such as decorating herself with beads, the other goals would suffer. The task of the woman is not to focus on doing one thing, but, albeit not too carefully, but to do something in each direction. And that was very wise. A man should focus on one goal - to kill a mammoth or to protect his woman. If he does not, both the woman and the children will die of hunger or at the hands of the enemy. And the woman has to do the rest.

Men think about the main thing, women - about everything else.
That is, the man focused on the main thing, and the woman ensures the smooth functioning of everything else. Without a man, a woman either dies of hunger or dies from the enemy, in the same way, without a woman, a man cannot go to kill a mammoth, who then will keep the fire, take care of the children, collect herbs? That is, the woman and the man performed different roles, which of course we know from history the ancient world or watching mom and dad. But women and men must think differently in order to fulfill their different functions. But this is not taken into account by teachers, builders, politicians, or even fashion designers.

Why is the difference in thinking not being taken into account now?
All nations used to teach girls and boys different sciences v different classes... Then the training was combined. Girls have proven that they can solve problems and know literacy even better than boys. Separate education was declared an anachronism, and the programs became as unified as possible, however, like medicine, fashion and everything else. True, the girls, as soon as they graduated from school, and the teacher ceased to praise them, abruptly gave up solving problems.
Now girls who are poor at adhering to one goal are scolded by our society for the lack of clear aspirations and praised if their behavior becomes more purposeful. They are trained to set goals better, to be more purposeful. And what do we get? Bitches, careerists, unfortunate "men in skirts", in best case... And at worst, we get a sharp exacerbation of global threats, a bunch of dangers from the very modern medicine modified Agriculture, thoughtless weapons. The impression is that men are playing in their sandbox called "Earth" already on a grand scale, they are not stopped by some kind of worldwide threats. And so that women do not get in the way under their feet, they remake their brains in a masculine manner.
Once again about the main distinctive feature female thinking (I speak competently, since the woman herself), women do not have such attachments to goals as men, and therefore do not get hung up on one thing. They feel general danger or safety, and, with more distracted attention, and developed emotionality, they feel general position things that affect her relationship with a man.

If the world were feminine.
What would happen to fashion if it was dictated by women as well? It would not be fashionable that it is believed that it looks beautiful for men, and to which women all say as one: "Well, who will wear it, how to wear it?" What is functional will be fashionable: warm, practical, or colorful. There would be a fashion for fat, busty, flat or "stern".
What would become of construction? No district would be built without a place general meetings, something like an agora among the ancient Greeks. All of today's such places are occupied by drinking men, who are only expelled from playgrounds with difficulty. But if women were in charge, then public places would be sheltered from the weather, free and guarded, there would be a ban on alcohol, trade, smoking. You have to talk somewhere, if the weather is bad and it should be close to home! A cafe or a club is not the property of society, they eat there, or collect fees, but there are no places for communication. They are not found anywhere, in any civilized country, except for African tribes! They also respect the peculiarities of female thinking!
What would happen in politics if ordinary women without career aspirations ruled at least half there? The world would be much safer because an ordinary woman it is unclear why it is necessary to produce more weapons than needed for protection. It's going to kill someone. And in general, children can get hurt.
Why now, when women seem to have all the rights, they live not according to women, but according to male rules? Because they are deprived of the most important right, the right to think like women. We are taught from childhood that thinking logically is good, that setting and achieving our goals is cool, we are taught this at seminars, books are written and films are made about it. As a result, the women themselves believed in it, and the world, developing one-sidedly, found itself in a threatening position.

Medicine has long known that speech impairment in boys is observed 2 times more often than in girls. After a stroke, speech skills in women are restored much better than in men. Some experts are inclined to believe that female and male thinking is to blame for everything here.

They differ markedly. Judge for yourself, during the processing of verbal information in the weaker sex, both hemispheres of the brain are involved, and in the stronger sex, only one. We can say that the female hemispheres are connected to each other with a thick "cable". But in the male hemispheres, communication is carried out through a thin "cable". It should also not be forgotten that beautiful creatures have a backup system for archiving data, while the stronger sex does not.

Feminine and masculine thinking in children

V school years thinking in girls is much better developed than in boys. Girls are more successful in performing those tasks that are associated with fluency of speech, memorization of words and phrases, speed of articulation. These skills are not lost with age, and in many cases even improve. The social context does not need to be discounted as well. But the model of communication that adults practice is formed precisely in childhood.

When communicate best friends, they lean towards each other, talk a lot, while maintaining eye contact... Their verbal talent is aimed at strengthening relationships.

It's not like that with boys. They rarely look at each other's faces, preferring to look sideways or past. As for conversations, they play a minimal role in strengthening relations. The main thing is physical activity on which the relationship is based.

Here we can say that boys always compete, and girls work together. However, boys are also inclined to cooperate. Only they do it using competition and focusing on physical activity.

Ability to negotiate

The ability to negotiate begins to show itself in primary school... In this case, a kind of children's hierarchy arises. Someone acquires a higher social status, and someone a lower one. In boys, the "leaders" give orders to other members of the group, acting on them verbally or physically. In such groups, there is often a rivalry for leadership, and the boys learn to fight back against each other.

Girls also have a hierarchy, but a different model of behavior is practiced. The weaker sex spends a lot of time talking, since communication has a very great importance... It is the type of conversation that determines the relationship. The one who is trusted with secrets gains status best friend... The more secrets are entrusted, the closer the girls perceive each other.

Since the verbal skills of the weaker sex are well developed, the “leaders” do not give orders. If one of the girls tries to command, then she is rejected and labeled as "commander", and this is a direct path to social isolation. V women's team discussion is practiced alternative options, as a result of which some kind of consensus is reached.

Feminine and masculine thinking in adults

Adult life is a continuation of childhood, since it is during childhood that verbal communication is consolidated. Therefore, everything gained during school years begins to manifest itself in family relationships and at work.

For example, a young new wife is driving with her girlfriend in a car. She is thirsty and asks her friend: "Emilia, are you thirsty?" What is Emilia with experience children's communication, answers: “I don’t know. And you?"

A discussion ensues between the women. They discuss whether they are thirsty enough to stop the car and buy a bottle of water.

A few days later, the same married young lady is driving with her husband. She asks him: "Are you thirsty?" To which he receives the answer: “I don’t want to”. The couple had a little quarrel that day. The wife was angry because she wanted her husband to stop the car. And he was angry because she did not say directly what she wanted. Such conflicts are quite common in families.

A similar scenario is typical for work. If a woman adheres male style leadership, then she is beginning to be considered a commander. And a man with exactly the same line of behavior is looked at as a decisive and self-confident leader.

Such stereotypes are formed, as a rule, at the most early stages social development... And they are due to the characteristics of female and male thinking. Therefore, on all continents, at all times, in all countries, at any age, men and women behave differently. This can be seen even from ancient manuscripts, the age of which is measured in centuries.

Conclusion

Female and male thinking is based primarily on the genetic characteristics of the sexes. It is these features that affect the social environment, and provoke an eternal conflict between the beautiful and strong half humanity. What are these genetic differences?

1. Men have one X chromosome, while women have two. In this case, one worker, and the second is in reserve.

2. Women are genetically arranged significantly harder than men since their active X chromosomes are a collection of maternal and paternal cells. A man receives his X chromosome from his mother, and the Y chromosome contains less than 100 genes. In comparison, there are 1,500 genes on the X chromosome.

3. Female and male brain differ in their biochemical composition and structure. Men's tonsils are larger, and they produce serotonin almost 2 times faster. However, science does not yet know how significant this difference is.

4. Representatives of the stronger and weaker sex react differently to stress. In beautiful creatures, the amygdala of the left hemisphere is involved. At the same time, the details of emotions are well remembered. As for men, they use the amygdala of the right hemisphere, and the essence of the problem with a very low emotional component is stored in the memory.