Whether to call first if the man does not call. Why a man does not call and whether it is worth calling him first. What to do if you waited for a call from a young man

Building relationships with a man is an art. Many girls do not master it perfectly, so they commit common mistakes. Due to banal errors and their own stupidity, even the most beautiful young ladies can remain lonely. One of the most sensitive questions that any girl asks: is it worth calling a man first? Find the answer below.

Don't call after the first date

Have you met a guy once? Did the man seem attractive to you? Then wait for the call. After the first meeting, a girl should not have a dilemma in her head: whether to call the first man or not. The answer will be no. Calling is definitely not worth it. If the guy is interested in your candidacy, he will call. If a man does not call, this does not mean that he has lost the number or cannot find five minutes. This means that he did not like the lady, and the guy does not intend to continue meeting with her. You can console yourself with thoughts of a lost number, but with the development of social networks it has become quite easy to find any person on the Internet. So don't bother the man who screwed you over. Find another guy who can appreciate your deep inner world. And to bother a person who does not want to make contact with you is not worth it. The guy will think that you are too desperate a lady, just call him first. The absence of mistakes at the first stage of the development of relations can elevate the girl in the eyes of the guy. Therefore, ladies must have patience and wait for a call from a gentleman after the first date.

Call, but not often

When the relationship between a guy and a girl will pass candy-bouquet period, the lady will again begin to wonder if she can often call her chosen one. Doing this is not worth it. From time to time, you need to remind yourself on the phone so that the guy does not think that he is completely uninteresting to you. But calls should be rare and irregular. Let's say one week you can call three times, and the next only one. Let the man think that you are calling by inspiration, and not by some elaborate strategy.

Did you hear from a friend that she called the first man and he was very happy? The representatives of the stronger sex are flattered female calls. They like to understand that women feel sympathy for their candidacies. But please the guy too often is not worth it. Otherwise, you risk raising the guy's self-esteem to the skies, and the chosen one will decide that now it's your turn to take care of him, since he has already conquered you. There should always be a slight understatement in a relationship. A guy needs to know that a girl likes him. But a man must understand that if he does not take care of the lady, then she can easily find another gentleman for herself.

Do you call after a fight?

Did you have a fight with a young man? If a woman calls a man first, then the guy will think that she realized her fault and now wants to ask for forgiveness. If the lady was really to blame for the quarrel and flared up unnecessarily, then she should not be ashamed to call first. Everyone should be able to admit their guilt. And there is nothing wrong with that. On the contrary, a prudent person will grow in the eyes of a man. If the guy was to blame for the quarrel, then the girl should not be the first to call. The man must apologize. And calling and asking if the chosen one has decided to ask for forgiveness is rather stupid. There is no need to build an all-forgiving heroine out of yourself either. Forgiving a guy for mistakes should only be when the person sincerely repents. If it doesn't, then don't waste your time. You will not be able to build a normal relationship with a person who cannot admit his guilt.

Will a man forget you if you don't call him?

The lady quarreled with the man and is thinking about how to behave. She wants to pick up the phone and dial a familiar number, but her pride won't let her. It is logical that the woman’s head comes to the question of whether her missus will forget her if she does not call. As mentioned above, if a quarrel occurred through the fault of a man, it is he who should call first. What if he doesn't call? If a guy can't find the strength to apologize, what kind of normal relationship can we talk about? A person should be able to admit mistakes. Will a man look for a replacement for a lady who could not understand the complex nature of a guy? If a person is in love, he will not immediately break off relations. He can wait for time to understand himself and come to some kind of decision. A well-resolved quarrel helps to make the relationship stronger and stronger.

The man is in grief

Having figured out whether to call the first man after a quarrel, a lady may not understand how to behave with a guy who has experienced grief. For example, is it necessary to call the first man whose father died? Yes, in this case, it is the girl who should take the initiative. A man will be morally ill, and help from his beloved will be appropriate. The girl should morally support her soulmate, say words of consolation. The task of the lady also includes taking care of the expulsion of sad thoughts from the mind of a man. The task of the lady is to convince the man that, despite all the troubles, life goes on.

When can you call first? If a guy gets sick or something bad happens in his family, you need to support the person. A man will not have time and energy to think about his beloved. The girl is temporarily responsible for asking the guy about his health and well-being. You need to show sincere concern, call and come more often. At the moment when a person feels bad, you can forget about prejudices. The Snow Queen can temporarily melt and turn into an affectionate kitten, which is able to cheer up and make the atmosphere in the house more comfortable and sincere.

Blockage at work

Women's secrets about when to call first relate to specific work situations. If your chosen one is running a complex business project and all his thoughts are busy preparing for the presentation, the lady should remind herself from time to time. When a man has an emergency at work, he will not think about romance or a lover. His thoughts will completely capture the project. Therefore, the girl should take care of the organization of leisure. She can call the guy and invite him to dinner or invite the man to spend the night with her. Come up with entertainment that will help the guy take his mind off his routine. Such manifestations of care will definitely not go unnoticed. The lady who happens to be next to the man in Hard time, is valued by a guy more than that person who is nearby only during a complete calm of life.

Holidays coming soon

When can a woman call first? One of women's secrets lies in the fact that a girl can impose her society on a guy during the holidays. For example, a lady can decide how a couple will spend City Day or New Year. Men do not like to plan such events and will gladly shift this responsibility onto the shoulders of their beloved. The guy will be satisfied with any scenario if the girl invites not only her friends, but also the guy's friends to the holiday. Making a lot of calls to consult with a guy about a holiday is not worth it. But from time to time you can call, because you will have a great reason. For example, you can ask how many friends the guy wants to invite, or specify the location of the celebration.

Don't call for no reason

Guys don't like to gossip, and they don't enjoy the usual chatter. Should I call a man first to find out how he is doing? If you don't have any excuse to call other than being bored, don't call. Guys love it when people know what they want and don't waste other people's time. Always find a reason, such as asking your boyfriend to go to an exhibition or talking about a book you recently read. A reason is also needed in order to fill in with words in case of a pause an awkward silence. Such hesitations often occur in the dialogues of people who do not know each other well. A girl may want to talk about a lot of things, and as a result she will be afraid and shy, which will lead to a pause in the conversation.

Business calls will show the guy that the girl is prudent and educated. The lady does not take time and always knows what she wants. Namely, this effect is what any woman achieves. A man should know that you like him and you value his time.

Have pride and don't waste time persuading

Should I call a man first? You can call if you have a reason to do so. But remember that you should not pamper your boyfriend with calls too often. And of course, you only need to call once a day. You should not leave messages on the answering machine and call 5 times if the guy does not answer. A man who sees even one missed from his beloved woman will definitely call back. He will not need to see 5-6 calls. In this case, he may think that trouble has happened to you.

A girl should have pride and understand when her company is unpleasant for a guy. If the lady called the gentleman and invited him to take a walk, then the man should take the next step. If the guy refused to go for a walk and did not offer to compensate for it with something, the meeting should be postponed not by the girl, but by the man. Don't waste your time coaxing someone who doesn't value you or your time.

Confirm plans

Thinking about whether to call a man first? If you want to confirm any plans, then you need to call. For example, a month ago you agreed to go to the theater, and the man had to buy tickets. You can call and clarify whether you are going to the performance or not. In this case, the call will be justified and appropriate. The same goes for the appointments you made last week. If you don't see your boyfriend too often, you can call him from time to time and ask if you're going on a date. But this should be a clarifying question, and not an ingratiating confirmation that the man has not changed his mind about giving you time.

Are you waiting for his call as much as the Africans of the rain? Do you doubt whether it is possible to call a man first? And even pride does not allow, prompts: "He promised to call back himself." But a day passes, another, a third ...

You gather courage and call yourself: after all, we have equality of the sexes, and any person can call first. Under the drum roll beaten off by your own heart, you dial a number, listen to the beeps, and ... And that's it. Or another option - another promise to call back in a day / week / month / year.

Let's get to the bottom of this agonizing "between us girls" situation. Why do guys sometimes allow themselves to be so insistent on ignoring you as a mobile subscriber and as a girl?

Reasons why he doesn't call

The first reason is fantastic. Perhaps your long-awaited beau is a terribly unlucky man. He had an accident, survived amnesia, and now painfully remembers your number, as well as his name and age. Well, at this time you are sitting and thinking, “Who should call first after a date?”

The same plausible version: your beloved is a CIA / KGB / FSB agent, and was forced to change passwords and appearances before his enemies found him. Naturally, it cannot contact you by mobile communication - wiretapping, after all. Or, God forbid, the enemies have already found him, and ... But it's better not to think about it, so as not to panic. But yeah, I wouldn't believe it either.

The second reason. Banal. He forgot your phone number. Happenes. I didn’t write it down, mixed up a couple of numbers, or lost my mobile phone. Or mom washed her jeans, in the pocket of which there was a piece of paper with a number that you so carefully wrote to your beautiful handwriting. And then it turns out that in vain you have already been sitting for the third day and thinking whether it is worth calling the man first.

True, pride tells us that in this case, a person who sympathizes with you should at least get on a plane and write “I love you” in the blue sky, or place an ad in a newspaper / order a banner on the central square, saying, “Katya, I lost your number and with it the meaning of life!” Briefly speaking, a real man will find a way to find you. But just in case, call back anyway, clarify, all of a sudden, he just wrote down the number incorrectly. Muddler.

More serious reasons why he does not call

Reason three. Family. While you are considering whether to call first, he is suffering from the fact that his family is against your meetings with him. Maybe they are Orthodox Jews, communists, or hereditary princes of Danish blood, and "their" mother considered you a floppy tail, not appreciating the new short skirt on your VK avatar.

Classical literature tells us that the true Romeo should still spit on such prohibitions. The main thing is not to overdo it, like in Shakespeare, and not drink poison.

It’s another matter if it’s not his mother who opposes this call, but his wife. Well, or the one who considers herself to be this wife. In this case, of course, he is a scoundrel, and, of course, one should not rely on honesty in further relationships. And whether it is worth waiting for his call - it already depends on the conscience of the man. Maybe he will decide to go left a couple more times and then, out of old memory, he will pick you up.

How to recognize a liar? Usually married gentlemen, or “married men,” as they are popularly called, still call back, complaining about the reasons from the first paragraph. This is how it is easy to figure them out and, having understood the motives, reject the call or find a way of terrible revenge. If fantasies fwatit.

Reason four. Offensive. He just didn't like you. It happens that you like him, but he doesn't like you. You can send an intriguing SMS with pleas for another chance, but it's better to switch to someone with more good taste and not guess after the first date who should call first.

And a couple of reasons for ignoring in the end

Reason five. Strange. There are guys who promise something all the time but never deliver. Probably your chosen one has already promised a lot of things different people, and now avoids contact. It's kind of like mental disorder. However, this person has a great future - with such a talent to promise beautifully and a lot, and then justify himself, he may well become a deputy.

Reason six. Psychological. Your friend is seriously offended. you hurt him male pride thinking you're just correcting an overblown ego. For men, this is a painful thing - almost like a kick in the groin. So there is nothing to think about why he does not call, perhaps it is your turn to write "I love you" in the blue sky with balloons.

As seen, good reasons a man does not have to call, and cannot be. Even if he is experiencing serious financial difficulties and can not top up the account on the phone. You sit and wait, thinking whether it is possible to call the man first. So he could ask a friend for a phone, after all. You can find you in contact or classmates. A lot of things are possible ... But it is impossible to offend a girl by ignoring.

For a man to always call you back himself, check out useful articles on our portal of Education and Self-development: find out, and, as well as from the first minutes of communication, who does not need a serious relationship.

Often, girls, being in the process of searching for a soul mate, go on dates to find out a man better and draw conclusions about the future with this or that person. The best alignment that everyone hopes for is mutual sympathy and full compatibility characters that develop into wonderful relationships.

It often happens that a man sinks into the heart from the first meeting, his boundless charm and external attractiveness make him go crazy, but whether he feels the same way about you remains an open question. You already know in advance that you would like to go with him on both the second and third dates, but what does he think of you? And most importantly - should he call first? The question is quite difficult and even rhetorical.

Obviously, in order for subsequent meetings to take place, everything must be done in order to good impression at the very first. Let's talk about what needs to be done in order to be most likely to please a man.

Many girls, going to the first meeting with a man, try to show themselves better than they are, to attribute to themselves non-existent good qualities and enhance the existing ones. This move might get you some attention. young man, but not for long, it will be rather unpleasant for him then to be disappointed if you really came up with some traits for yourself. Therefore, if you are planning long term relationship, then you should show yourself to be the person you really are, because the chance that you will be loved the way you are will increase many times, but the wrong person will be eliminated at the dating stage.

The first date should not resemble hunting for a man, in no case should you immediately let him know that you are very interested in him. The first meeting is only an acquaintance, the time when you get to know each other better, make your first impression. You better show yourself a good companion who knows how to tell and listen, but you should not look at a man as if with hungry eyes. To be interested in something is gently, in an unobtrusive manner. In all your words and actions, respect must be shown both to yourself and to the interlocutor.

If your intentions regarding a man are serious, of course, you should not go to bed with him on the first date. If you are a woman of free views and want to have a pleasant night or find yourself a partner for periodic meetings with a known goal, then you are welcome. After all, it may happen that you decide that a man will do you only for a pleasant pastime. In this case, it is worth discussing your intentions in advance. But hoping in this way to fall in love with a man and tie him to yourself is completely useless. There are exceptions when there is such a strong attraction and even love between partners that the relationship develops into a serious one, but they are very rare.

If, for some reason, you still spent the night with a man after the first date, this should bind you hand and foot in terms of further action. No calls! If you hooked a man, then he will certainly call you again. However, you should make sure whether he considers you from now on only as a girl for periodic meetings or has serious intentions. The main thing is to behave extremely restrainedly and not to press on the young man, even if you really want to.

The main principle in order to please a man is not to show excessive interest, have a share of self-respect and let him know that you have your own affairs and other interests besides dating him. However, you should not go too far with this, so as not to seem like a proud arrogant from the category of “my rose did not bloom for you.”

Should I call after the first meeting?

Whatever you say, the best move is not to call a man after the first date first, wait for his initiative. The fact is that this is, as it were, an indicator of his attitude towards you: if you are interested in a man and do not get out of his head, will he wait for better times? His desire to call you again will be as natural as looking at the girl he likes with loving eyes.

So, after the first meeting, it's better to just wait for his call, without taking any action. additional actions. Most men are conquerors by nature, a girl arouses interest in them only if she needs to be achieved, she just doesn’t go into her own hands. Therefore, if a young man is about to call you, and you get ahead of him, then this can, if not kill, then weaken his interest in you.

In order not to break loose and not call first, when your hands itch so much, when you so want to hear his kind voice, it is best to do something to quench this thirst. Switch your attention to walking with friends, going to interesting places, favorite hobby. Sometimes work makes you distract from the dreary expectant look at the phone. If so, then load yourself to the eyeballs so that there is simply no time to think about it!

If a young man stubbornly does not call you for several days, you can act in two ways. Most likely, this means that you just turned out to be not to his taste, or he has more important things to do than you, so you should either ignore this, switching to looking for a new “candidate”, or still call him (better - write) and in an unobtrusive way to clarify whether he is going to continue communicating with you. The tone of this question should sound like a business question, asking if his company is going to work with your suppliers, or if you should look for new candidates. In any case, if you meet a refusal in his actions or words, then at least this will make sure that you no longer need to waste your time on empty expectations.

There are also cases when young people think exactly the same as you, and are afraid to seem intrusive with their call. Maybe, while you are in doubt whether to call him, he is gnawed by exactly the same doubts, and he prefers to wait for a call from you to make sure that you are interested? In this case, it makes sense to wait a few days and then call.

It should be understood that if you are not interested in a man, the call, most likely, will not follow either in a day, or in a week, or in two. This, of course, can hit women's pride very hard, especially if this person drove you crazy at the first meeting, but in no case should you start bombarding him with calls and find out why he does not seek to communicate with you. Let you not meet some preferences this man, but you won’t lose dignity in his eyes if you respect yourself at least a little bit. Some men, by the way, are even offended by the fact that a woman does not shower him with hundreds of messages a day and does not fall into his arms at the first call.

Even if a man directly said that he did not want to continue communication, in no case should you “lose face” and start blaming him for something, throwing a tantrum, expressing your dissatisfaction. The most best tactic- do not respond to this kind of message, wish all the best and cross out this candidate from everywhere, as if he did not exist.

What to do if you waited for a call from a young man?

The call of the man you were interested in came the very next day, and in addition to this, he writes you a message every free minute? It is worth rejoicing - you definitely interested him, and all the cards are now in your hands. However, this does not always mean that you can “relax” and start calling and texting him in unlimited quantities. Your task now is to keep this interest.

On subsequent dates, continue to get to know the person as best you can so that you have an objective picture in front of you. If you see clear interest and even the love of a man, this does not mean that you need to immediately liberate yourself and hang yourself on his neck. Whatever one may say, it is better to leave an aura of mystery around you, to have some mystery in yourself. To do this, it’s enough just not to spread all the ins and outs about yourself and be somewhat restrained in feelings. It is not necessary, of course, to rush to the other extreme, everything needs to know when to stop. This behavior will only show you how decent girl. It will be great if you can find common interests and hobbies, then your communication will be more relaxed and harmonious.

Some girls use next rule: at least a couple of times a date should be refused. At first glance, this will most likely seem silly, but in practice it will only help reinforce your image of an “independent” woman who has important things to do besides dating a man. Of course, you should not refuse dates just like that, it’s better to call sometimes and reschedule them for another time, referring to being busy.

When several meetings have passed and the man does not overwhelm you with calls, it is quite possible that he is acting on the same tactics as you, creating the appearance of an impregnable gentleman. No matter how he behaves, you should not call him hourly to chat about all sorts of little things. It is worth calling only when you really know that he is glad to hear your voice at any time, that your company is a real reward for him. You should also not send him bundles of meaningless messages. It is better to send messages only on business - so messages from you will be perceived as something very interesting and important.

No matter how much you want it, you should not start thinking of yourself as an insidious temptress and play with the feelings of a guy. Cunning and insincerity are far from the best tactics. In your feminine appearance, there should also be such things as simplicity, spontaneity, few people will like intrigue and dishonesty. If you are open with a young man, if he sees that you do not harbor anything unkind in your soul, then this will only contribute to his love for you and good relations further. Of course, you should respect yourself and know your worth, but you should not consider yourself an unattainable ideal.

It should be noted that in most cases, circumstances and even your heart themselves suggest what to do, whether to dial the guy's number first, how to behave with him. Sometimes people are so enthusiastically communicating with each other at the first meeting and so absorbed in each other that none of them even doubts whether to call first. People who are mutually in love with each other do not even think about some tricky tactics to keep their partner's attention, so as not to seem intrusive, they do not calculate the time after which they need to call after the first meeting. Sometimes people find the person they've been looking for all their lives on their first date and melt into each other the first time they meet. Do we need some stupid pride, doubts, cunning strategies here?

And sometimes both parties do not even need to pretend to be anyone, meetings occur naturally and somehow on their own, gradually and very smoothly growing into mutual interest. It is wonderful when neither party falls in love prematurely and the initiative of both partners looks natural.

However, not everything always goes so smoothly and ideally, and often one partner falls in love at first sight, when the other is still indifferent and it takes him time to get to know the person better and only then draw some conclusions about him. If you are in the place of the first, then you should just refrain from showing excessive interest and attention. If you do not allow yourself to constantly remind a man about you, making his phone burst with notifications, this will only benefit you by making you a win-win reputation. You should not think that an SMS message will not let a man know that you are interested in him. Men tend to interpret as interest in his person even a like from a girl in social network what about messages?

These tips will allow you not only to be most likely to please a young man, but also not to get into trouble in any situation. And, most importantly, remember: if a man likes you, then he will call you and get you out of the ground!

Pages of women's secrets

Good afternoon, dear readers! Many girls wonder what to do if a man does not call. Maybe he lost interest, a lot of work fell on him, he found another one. Let's try together to figure out what to do and how to be. Do not panic, do not impose and interest a man so that he will run on his heels.

Do not panic

The first thing you need to understand is that don't throw a tantrum if a guy doesn't call you for two or three days. With your panic, you will only frighten off the man and he will think that you are some kind of crazy. Breathe out a little. Relax. And think sensibly. Why can't he call? Maybe he told you that he will soon have an emergency at work, but you missed this moment. Or he must go on a business trip to where he does not catch the connection.

If there was nothing of the kind, then another question arises: is it worth calling the young man herself? Here begins the game under the motto "what less woman we love…”, but it has a reciprocal character. Calling first is sometimes very worth it.

One of my clients met a young man on a dating site. They corresponded for a long time, but he did not show much initiative. Then I asked her why she did not offer to call? She was afraid to take this step first. Her upbringing said that a man should. I suggested that she just try it, and she agreed. In the next session, she thanked me for the hint. After all, thanks to her first step, they made an appointment.

Here, the main thing is to be able to stop in time and not start calling him every five minutes. In this case, you can easily get into the black list of contacts. Do you need it? This behavior is again due to your panic. You know, there are women who call their missus every half an hour. I always in such a situation the question arises: does she really have nothing else to do?

Panic makes it difficult to reason. When you calm down your emotions and become more calm, then you can take a sober look at the situation and understand that there is nothing wrong with a man not calling for a couple of days. Remember that men talk about this topic in a completely different way. For them permanent telephone conversations do not have such of great importance like for women.

If you cannot find answers to some questions that are very important to you and are afraid that the problems that have arisen cannot be solved -.

Know your worth

It is very important to love yourself and not let a man play with him. If you are spinning around him, doing whatever he wants, running after him, and he has not called for two weeks, then think about whether you need such a relationship. Remember that relationships are a reciprocal process. You shouldn't be doing everything alone.

If you suddenly stopped communicating without apparent reason, do not fuss. Do not impose yourself and your communication. Mind your own business, communicate with other people, work, find a hobby. Don't focus on the man. Otherwise, you will become addicted. And this does not allow you to build healthy relationships.

If a man does not call or write for more than a week, then you have only a few options.

• The first is to call yourself. Maybe he has now difficult period at work and your call will help him.
• The second is to continue to wait for the first step from him, winding himself up.
• Third, relax and get on with your life.

In my opinion, the most correct thing to do would be to call yourself and find out if everything is in order. And then act according to the situation.

If you do not find a place for yourself, you suffer, you constantly think about it, then I strongly advise you to read the article "". Perhaps there you will find interesting solutions for myself.

So that it doesn't happen to you similar situations so that men always call you themselves and look for your attention, you need to work on yourself. To get started, I recommend that you read the article "". There you will find many useful tips and ideas.

Being in a long relationship

The problem of lack of attention in long-term relationships is one of the most common. Girls usually complain that their beloved has stopped calling often, does not write more sms. This is all fixable. You do love each other. You just need to talk. Honestly and frankly.

Remember that men always try to avoid scandals and quarrels. Therefore, it is in your power to calmly talk to him. Don't raise your voice, don't yell at him. You are a normal, emotionally stable young lady who can speak logically and reasonably. Explain the situation from your side. And listen carefully to what he says to you. Don't ignore his words.

In addition, do not try to explain something to a man with the help of hints. If he rarely calls you and you want more, then just say so directly. Equiwoks will pass by your missus. Young people do not perceive such things.

Why are they laughing at female logic? Because women most often draw conclusions, make decisions, speak with the help of hints, what is read between the lines. Men do things differently. Don't forget about it.

If you suddenly caught yourself thinking that the relationship is coming to naught, your missus has somehow cooled off, then I recommend that you familiarize yourself with the work "".

Pull yourself together

Dear ladies, you urgently need to stop thinking that you are not worthy of something, that your happiness depends only on a man, that you are somehow not like that. In order for men to pay attention to you more often, you must be. You must love yourself.

Women very often underestimate themselves. They think that they are ugly, too fat, stupid and much more. Stop thinking about such things and take care of yourself. Raise your level of education. Take care of your appearance. Start eating right. Find something interesting and useful activity outside of work.

When you become, confident and wise woman, then you will not face the question of how to attract attention. Many young ladies complex because of the child. And they believe that it is impossible to find a man in this position. Believe me, it's not. Read the article "" and you will see for yourself.

Do you have everything you need to be interesting woman. You can easily become the one on which the eyes of all men are directed. One has only to want and start doing something in this direction.

If your problems in relationships with men are permanent, I think it will be extremely useful for you to read the article "". Remember that there is a way out of any situation. Even hopeless!

Dear ladies, I will be very glad to see your comments on this topic. Perhaps some of you have experienced similar problem. Did you dare to call the man first and what did it lead to? What did you do when a man disappeared for a week and didn't call?

Sign up for a Skype consultation with me and you will learn much more about yourself, your man and methods that will help you cope.

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I have a slightly different problem. My man believes that calls and SMS are not needed at all. He believes that the abyss for a week and not communicate is normal for a relationship. We've been together for five years. It's very hard. I am constantly in hysterics because he just does not want to communicate with me. When he wanted, he came. Wanted to leave. I don't know what to do with it. We were talking about it. He said that he did not want to write and call, and this is normal for him.

Hello, Elena! And I'm not sure he still loves me. Even though he says yes. The candy-bouquet period has just ended. We generally have very complicated relationship. I don't want to put up with a lot. Because in my understanding it is wrong. What is happening to us.
What did you do? Yes all! They even broke up. And then everything from the beginning. It lasts for about a year.
A couple of days ago, I again started talking about his attitude towards me, that I don’t like the way he behaves and hurts. I became so vicious. It already comes to the point that I stooped to insults and fights. She threw herself at him and hit him with her hands. I got so scared. What was it? I acted like crazy! And he got scared. Me. I try to convey to him that I feel bad. In response, I always hear "you always feel bad." I tried to explain that my behavior is a consequence of his attitude towards me. I have never had so much anger and hatred. He constantly laughs at me. I make him laugh with my behavior, and it only makes me feel worse. But still I love it. I don't know how to behave. Tired of fighting.

Elena, yes, I really can't influence him. Yes, and how? He is already 40. He took place as a person. He was married and has a daughter from his first marriage. He has everything I dream of! Sometimes it seems to me that he survived all this and is now not interested in a relationship that will develop into a family. Even more often I think that I do not cause a desire to love, care, respect. Finally get married! Thus showing that he wants to build his life with me.
He considers himself smarter than others. Always includes a "psychologist" and says that no one will make me happy. I myself am responsible for this and must entertain myself. Doesn't see the line between spending time "together" and "next to" each other. I don't know how to change the situation. What can I do to change his attitude towards me?

Elena, it's not about the protest. I just can't understand why a woman always has to change? I changed so many times that I lost myself. I had hobbies, hobbies .. now there is nothing. I am not interested in anything and can not find any new occupation for myself. I no longer understand who I am, what I'm interested in! Changed myself so I don't know. I stopped being myself. And it didn't change anything! Only anger appeared. On him, on myself .. yes, on everyone. Is it worth changing yourself if you already have a bitter experience of failure in this?

No, Elena, I understand that you are not defending him. But it makes me feel negative that from all sides they tell me that I must change. “Change yourself,” etc. In an effort to improve relationships, I ceased to be a person. I hate myself for being weak and emotional dependence From him. And I understand that it's my own fault. I changed for relationships. But it didn't desired result. How to change for yourself? If I can't even choose an activity to distract myself. I want to be interesting to myself and to him.

The girl, simply, was not interested in him! Blame yourself! I advise you to get out of the relationship for a while ... you already converge then scatter ...
But, not in English..
At the meeting, explain to him very calmly and seriously that you need time to sort out your affairs. (You don’t need to dedicate it to which ones) be firm and resolute. Take a break at your own initiative. PAUSE and not parting ... more than 2 weeks, it is advisable not to make themselves felt. Change your hairstyle, wardrobe, make it a rule to buy yourself, at least once a week, bouquets of flowers. Allow yourself to visit cinema, theaters, opera!!! Yes, believe me, you need it! Walk more! Write yourself a schedule for 3 weeks ahead. Attending drawing, sculpting, something creative is very necessary at such moments! And you yourself will see yourself, the one that hid in a corner behind a screen of anger and resentment!!!
I wish you success!

Hello, I have such a problem: we meet a little more than six months. I am 24, he is 22. In the beginning everything was just perfect, he was attentive and caring, almost everything free time dedicated to me. But about recent months 2 has changed a lot. Rare messages a couple of times a day, one might say, a general lack of interest in where I am and what I do. I tried to talk, to find out what was the matter. He says that the love has passed, he has achieved me, but still loves. But to any question on the topic of why he does not invite me anywhere and does not come to me, an aggressive reaction. And in general, bouts of agoessia often began to appear, maybe even with a foul language to answer. Says I'm blowing his brains out, thinks I'm trying to keep him on a leash. Although we see each other only at sports and sometimes in the evenings when I come to visit him. Those. We don't spend much time together. I don't know what to do, they're in my head bad thoughts that he is interested in someone on the side, or maybe he doesn’t want to continue the relationship at all and deliberately behaves in such a way that she herself leaves. What should I do in this situation?

Hello! I really liked your advice. Write straight to the point!) I would also like to consult. I have been dating my boyfriend for almost a month. At first he also showed attention, called several times a day, wrote. And in the last three days, less and less calls or writes to me. I feel like he's testing me because I, out of my stupidity, to his question whether I like him, answered yes. do you think he is really testing me? I probably shouldn't have told him that. I don't want him to think that I'm head over heels in love with him.

Alexandra:

Hello! I met a guy, talked, saw each other. He acted like a gentleman. But with romance in terms of communication, a complete disaster. No "bunny" and "cute" can not be used to him, and he did not use me. And I missed that. As a result, I gave him a dressing down, he sent me the next day and I started to panic, saying they say let's talk, etc. And he just blacklisted me everywhere. And now, a week later, he comes to my page and puts “likes”. I really like him and I apologized to him then. What to do?

Hello!
I had a friend who had been friends for over 15 years. I knew all his girls, they changed, I stayed. At that time I had long term relationship which he also knew about. But we've always had warm relationship and we liked each other. Somehow there was a period, we did not see each other for more than 2 years, and accidentally met in the crowd. He recognized me. Then they met a second time, he said that he lives with an unloved girl, supposedly he needs her for the sake of his career. After the third meeting, he said that he could not be near her, she annoyed him, and we allegedly had an unfinished romance. But I have a taboo on "married" men. At this point, I'm breaking up with my boyfriend.
I have always felt comfortable with him. He's totally my type, but I didn't want to be his next ex.
As a result, he came to me with the words I can’t do this anymore, broke up with his “wife”.
We went on vacation together as a couple, as we have known each other for a very long time, no one was inflating their own price, they behaved naturally. In a nutshell, the week was great, nothing to complain about.
When they returned for a while, everything was fine, and then he just disappeared.
About a month later, I learn that he has returned to his "wife". To all requests to meet and talk, the person simply avoids me. He promised to come many times, but he never came.
A year has passed, and I still can not calm down.
Was 15 years of friendship really worth canceling out just to sleep with me?
And I still want to meet him.
I don't know what to do here.

Hello. I have a really weird situation. I have been talking with a young man for 3 months already, writing off very often, despite the fact that he works all day and I do. We also called every day. But two weeks ago he started writing less often and stopped calling me. Then he said that he needed a week to think about me. As a result, a week later he called and said that we would continue to communicate. It was only after this week of silence that everything changed in our further communication. He stopped calling me gentle words i.d., does not call. Writes sometimes, very rarely in general. But when we write off, it behaves like nothing happened. I don’t reproach him for this, I don’t create tantrums, I pretend that everything is ok. I get the impression that he's either testing me or he doesn't need me anymore. I often write first. What should I do to write first, or what should I do???

Good afternoon. I'm confused, I need help. My young man has been brainwashing me for 1.5 years, he was looking for a job for a long time, and fed me with phrases like: wait a little longer, then we’ll rent an apartment, or wait a little longer, you understand me, now there is no money, I do everything, they just don’t pay for a long time. Now, when there is work, he still treats me like an egoist, when he is in public and I call him, he answers rudely, then calls back and, as if nothing had happened, his father fell ill, I immediately wanted to rush by taxi at night, he said no I have to take it myself and was rude to me on the phone again when I called back later. I turned off my phone for a day at the weekend, he didn’t even look for communication with me, although I hadn’t done this before, we almost never go anywhere, he doesn’t invent anything, everything suits him. And I also hinted to him that I love jewelry and perfumes for the holidays, and he sculpts owls and birds from clay for me, this is his hobby, he says that the best thing is to do it yourself. When I fell ill like a woman at work and I could no longer work in the cold, he offered to buy pills and thermal underwear instead of picking me up from that job. I live at my house, he lives at his place. He is 27 years old, he lives with his parents and I am sitting there...

Even as I said, I even left him, I said absolutely everything that does not suit me as far as his actions and behavior that does not suit me, he promises to improve, says that he loves and continues again.

Hello! My man is 15 years older than me. Conversations constantly translates to the topic of sex, he wants and can, but at the same time he may not call and not report himself for several days. I really like him, it's interesting with him, I wouldn't want to change my partner, but intimacy is very rare. How can he say this without humiliating himself? He does not like easily accessible women, "hunter" by nature. How to speak frankly with him, while remaining his desired prey?

Hello. Met a guy at a nightclub. In general, in such establishments, everyone gets acquainted for one night. He invited me to dance, bought a flower (of course, I did not expect this). They even exchanged phone numbers. But did not give:-| :) After that, he tried to meet, I refused. Even his friend wrote to me, admitted that he liked me (I don’t know what it was for). And so I agreed to the meeting. I must say that the guy immediately said that he was not ready for a serious relationship. And he offered to meet without obligation. As a rule, he writes first (not every day, as he is very busy), asks how things are going, tries to arrange a meeting. If I refuse him, he tries to find out why and what I will be so busy with. When we meet, we talk for a long time, he says how his week went, what happened to him, he is interested in how it went for me. If my phone rings, it constantly asks who is calling me so persistently: D . He himself told why he does not want a serious relationship. During sex, he asks if I'm okay. I fall asleep in his arms and wake up in them. I told him that I don’t like it when a guy is unshaven, now he always comes to a meeting smooth
:-)) , said that I did not like the smell of his perfume, now she uses another one, at least when she comes to me. I asked him to give me a massage, he did it without question.
I had a couple of times a relationship without obligations, but there was no such relationship even in small things. One said that he had irritation from shaving, the second simply replied: "Get used to it."
I just don't know if this relationship will make any sense?

Elena, you understood correctly, we are lovers, we have a relationship without obligations. We have our own families, everything is complicated there. "We get" what is not at home. He had a story when a woman pursued him, he did not know how to get rid of her. He himself told me that he did not like easily accessible women. At the same time, she teases me, wants me to provoke intimacy herself. I want it to happen more often, but I can't force myself on him. I don't want to lose him.

Dated a guy for 3 months. And he offered to get together. Quarrels and scandals began. He rented an apartment and moved out. We agreed to meet. Again, minor scandals, I managed to meet a girl, go to a cafe and invited me to tea. Says there was nothing. We broke up for 4 days. All these days he watched my life in social networks. I wrote to him, why? he called back and happily agreed to a meeting. We reconciled for 2 days and again a scandal. Now he is categorically against relations, but ... he also observes in social networks, we communicate by phone, he is not against meetings, he is always ready to help. What should I do? I won't understand him. The relationship has been going on for 10 months. I really want to keep them

Hello, Elena. I would very much like to hear your opinion. I met a young man, began to communicate, then meet. And then something went wrong. Because of the unsuccessful past relationship experience, he is afraid to start new ones. And he often talks to me about it. But despite all this, he is affectionate with me, says that he likes me. And I think I fell head over heels in love with him. So all this lasts for 4 months. AT recent times he generally began to move away, promises to come, and does not appear. Then he calls, and as if nothing had happened. I have already stopped calling first, even though I did so before. Now I’m thinking, maybe he’s not interested in me at all, and he doesn’t respect me, since he allows himself such irresponsibility towards me? How to understand his behavior? Help advice, I'm very worried and suffering. I understand that relationships are supposed to be fun. But I can’t live like this, from meeting to meeting either. You can't have a constructive conversation with him. I tried to talk to him, but the dialogue did not work. He doesn't want to open up to me. But he says everything will be fine.

I don't even know if my situation relates to the above. But I want to hear advice. A man wrote to me in VK, invited me to the cinema. Went down, liked it. In correspondence, after the movie, I thanked him. But then he did not write. It so happened that I had tickets to the theater, I plucked up the courage to call. Not properly? I guess it's yes. He agreed. They went great. He said that everything was fine and that he was in touch. But that's all. He wrote no more. It's been a week already. I don't write either. But I really want to understand: everything or not everything. Can I, for example, write to him in a week? Or is it not worth trying? Is there anything I can do, or have I already lost in this relationship?

Hello. In my childhood up to 8 years, there were big emotional problems in the family. Mom and dad were completely inadequate. This includes alcohol, beatings, tantrums, constant stress, tears, terrible words. My parents were psychos themselves, of course, they were not up to me. And attention was given out in portions. In short, I grew up a downtrodden, insecure girl, with a bunch of complexes, in any society this is read. Problems and complexes go with me to this day. I am very insecure, I always compare myself with others not in my favor, I am jealous of my partner, I enter into relationships with guys who have been dating me for 1.5 and 2 years, and nothing happens. They are not attentive to my desires, it is difficult for me to part with them, I am afraid to meet them with others, depression does not keep me waiting.

How can I give up those relationships that constantly return me to suffering from childhood, I now understand that my family was the complete antipode of what I dream of, but my consciousness was formed just like that, how to change libido, gain confidence and tell a guy who does not love me - for now, if that feels like being skinned alive. And recently, when I talk to him, I often imagine that I’m yelling with all my might, as if I’m standing on top and letting everything out of myself with all my might. Thanks

Hello
It's strange, as soon as a man realizes that I love him, he immediately stops communicating.
This is already the second experience, they resumed relations with the second one after 12 years and met a couple of times. Then I left for another country and wrote off messages and called up constantly. And now, after 2 weeks of such communication, abruptly after I said that I couldn’t live without him, he …disappeared‍♀️
I didn’t see his message in the morning, there was nothing from him all day, I decided to write how I was doing myself. I answered dryly that everything was ok and that’s all ...
Two days later, I wrote: “good morning, albeit without your messages,” and that I let go of the situation. He replied Good afternoon and all
Week later.
I understand that it makes no sense to write or call, right?
I don’t understand at all how he so wanted to meet after 12 years and everything was fine ... and abruptly disappeared.
I do not understand anything(((

We met, became friends, began to meet .. Several months passed ... In general, the queen is delighted .. Ie. he .. I liked both as a person and as a man .. I liked it (Everything is fine .. But he apparently calmed down a little, a little less attention it became ... I stupidly kept silent, but I myself didn’t get too active in questions ... Something stopped sticking as before .. Veal tenderness didn’t flow in correspondence almost anymore ... Well, I don’t mess with it on the phone ... No, it was all, but pull me up with something ... Well, we are all trying to be correct .. Although we have been demolished the tower more than once .. We discussed the issue. She asked him, as if for a hundred years together, they began to communicate dryly. I was glad to talk - I also noticed !! He offered to meet further and develop ... Get to know each other ... He said that he was not used to rushing. He wants to check himself. I decided that the changes in communication were not only my fears towards him, but he was also thinking about something ... I was apparently scared ... More precisely, I was confused ... What to do .. How ... Do I need it ... Do I really need it ... I understand that it closed somehow... He decided, in general, that he didn’t understand what was happening. Say so. Answered - Yes, that's not the point! I can’t say that I don’t want to, and it pulls and it’s nice and that’s it .. But it doesn’t stick like before .. I write with ex-girlfriend.. some excitement ..
Well, what am I .. I put an end to. She said to go where it is better, everything is simple. Your head, not for me to think. It is clear that she did not begin to express unnecessary thoughts, why, if a third one appeared .. a third ... She did not say anything else. Generally.
What to say? Why didn't you ask how I feel and what's going on? Or carry everything? Well, of course, she kept silent ... I didn’t ask before, now what to discuss ???
And he didn't answer. And silent for the 5th day. I don't write, I don't call. I won't!
But, damn... Nauseous! Either she herself pushed the person away with her behavior, or something ... It seemed that these relations were utopian, we cannot be together and were afraid to become attached to him ... But yes ... I felt like a queen with him (..
In the bottom line… Silent for a week. I understand that this is the end. And.. I feel sick. I can't help it, I'm sick and that's it. Of course I'm silent in a rag (

Yes, he said so. I let go of the situation and we met a couple more times, even I lived with him while I was in his city. Now we write off messages, he likes the photos that I post and he also affectionately calls me. He says that the saved relationships at a distance are rewarded with eternity. And how long they will stretch does not say and it seems that he is not going to move to me.

It didn't clear up. Silent. I think this is the end. Or in a few months it will be drawn as to the former ...
Yes, I didn’t know exactly how to behave.. He is an indecisive person. And he knows this himself and has said it more than once, and she understood it herself .. For example- (Name), why were you silent all day? Something happened?
Answer - I was in a bad mood, I didn’t want to spoil it for you either
-But what happened, who ruined it??
-CTG can ruin my mood? Only myself. This happens when you don't the right attitude.. I am dissatisfied with myself, with my stupidity and stupidity ..
(Next, a portion of compliments from my side, on target as always. And today, the right attitude, I ask, I said Yes !!!)) We drove .. Soon he disappeared for 3 days! And again instead of Hello, Beauty, simple Hello, how are you? My question is (Name!!! Hello!! Where are you disappearing?? Answered- I indulged in despondency ... I ask- Well, what happened, can I help? Says- You know .. I really don’t know myself .. I don’t understand and I can’t formulate. I don’t know what it is ... I supported again - Well, calm down, you (Name), so smart, caring, blah blah blah what a cool. Don't be sad!
Answered - I know. I'm normal .. It's not even sadness .. I don't know what's wrong with me!
Once asked .. Two ... Supported, encouraged as always. But noted- Relationships no longer bring joy. But they bring hassle, and this is not buzzing. It is necessary to merge such relations. Cynically yes. But further pull all this if it turns into a disease ...
What happened next was what I wrote in the first comment.
Does not communicate with me, so there is no need for me. And if I'm not needed, then he's not my passenger.
We need a bright, self-sufficient, smart, beautiful, you ...
I'm fine.

Those. didn't I kill the relationship? I thought my fears
on the contrary, I ruined everything ... If so, it turns out not in vain Thank you)
What would you say if you knew that we both have families? This does not change anything. Everything was planned for the long term.
Wife that is, that is not, by the word former, I did not mean her.
I am in a better position in this regard. I don't really need to look for relationships on the side. (Not sex is stupid, but relationships along with it) ... unlike him ... It just happened ...

Elena, I think that relationships are teamwork. By the way, he is all in his work and I honestly told him that I was thrown out of his life, because. he doesn’t tell me how things are and in general except for “ Good morning" nothing. Is it worth it to pull a relationship? That is, he seems to want, but does nothing for this.

Not! He needed to - he got me out of the ground and sought. If it will be necessary again, let him do it again .. If he succeeds. Another conclusion is that my husband is better ... Reliable, fair, tested over the years, albeit somewhat brutal, even if he doesn’t kiss and hug endlessly, but he’s the best and I told him that). Apparently I had to go through this ... More precisely, both of us had to go through some kind of comparison ... Once he chose me, now I am convinced that my shirt is closer to the body). Time will tell). We decided now to buy an apartment) My husband certainly does not know anything. But seeing some disheveled feelings of course supported me. Thank you! You helped me put shelves in my head!

Hello. My relationship lasted six months, met at a distance. I wanted to cut back and leave to live with him, but at the last moment he began to tell me about his doubts that we would not get along, what then to do, what would happen to me, where should I go in the metropolis? I freaked out and said goodbye to him, I want to note, before that also parted very often only on my initiative, terrible temper. Recently called up said to change not be impulsive, cook, clean, be economic. Okay, I promised him this. I indulged in everything, but one call and he says in it that we will only communicate, the relationship is over, but communication is under his control (you can’t communicate with anyone except him), I didn’t like it and I freaked out again, he hung up and after this is a complete disregard. Already days like 4, subscribed to social network for a girl. I can't figure out if it's needed or not? Relationship ended or not? When communicating, he still showed jealousy. I want to understand if in this case the man will come back to me ??

MCH and I met on a dating site, everything went well for a week of courtship, we went to the sea and had a rest (I have a daughter of 1.8 years old) treats her well. He invited me to his house, after that he left the keys, he was at the weekend, he said that he had to go to another city for work, he said he would arrive by 10 o’clock in the evening. He said that I was waiting with my daughter at his place, I said ok. But he never came home, did not answer the calls, turned off the phone, and did not spend the night on Sunday either. In general, for two days I myself was in his apartment with a child, no answer from him, no greetings. I arrived on Monday, apologized, talked, said that I was with friends, but it’s not a fact whether there were friends there. Yesterday I visited him in the evening, he said that I should go home to my place, as his friends would come and we should naturally spend the night with him ( studio apartment). I pick up the child and he takes me home, takes me and says we'll meet tomorrow, I say ok. And in the end, the next day there was no SMS or call from him, I also keep quiet, I don’t write or call. But he didn't take the keys from me.
What to do??? How to be?? I can't figure out what's going on!??

Good afternoon! I've been dating a guy for about a year. At first everything was fine, he was so attentive, caring, just super in bed. It was like that for about half a year, then he gradually changed in his attitude towards me, sex is less frequent, he doesn’t give compliments like at the beginning, everything became stable and routine, but most importantly, he became very irritable.
If I try to tell him that I don’t like something (I always speak calmly, I never get hysterical or scream), he takes everything as a complaint and says that I got him with my reproaches. At the same time, he can raise his voice and be rude. For example, if I say that we haven’t done anything together for a long time, we haven’t gone anywhere, this is also perceived by him as a reproach against him and he gets annoyed. Sometimes, because of some little thing, she can get together and go home (we don’t live together) and not call for two days until I myself call first. It seems to me that he has fallen out of love with me ... He can disappear for several days, while he is absolutely not interested in where I am and what I am doing. And the last time, after another such “quarrel”, he disappeared again, and when I asked what was the matter, he said that he wanted to be alone, I did not contradict ... We have not been talking for a week ... What should I do? It is also worth saying that at moments when everything is calm, he treats me very well, calls affectionate words, hugs, kisses, picks up every day from work, in general feeling normal relationship. But as soon as there is some kind of misunderstanding between us, he shows unthinkable rudeness and indifference ...

Hello, Elena! 3 months ago I was at a corporate party, it happened that we had a good drink, and my employee- the only man in the team, ended up at my house. We slept. He is divorced and for a long time showed me signs of attention, I tried to ignore them. But since my husband is sick and does not live with us, I succumbed. Now we have a relationship in which he first showed attention. Now, as soon as I call or write, he invites me to a cafe and then I have great sex again at home. Then silence again. I honestly don't know what to do next. And how to understand it?

Anastasia:

Good day, Elena! Thanks for your article. I have this situation: 17 years ago I had a holiday romance with a foreigner, I worked in his country, and we practically lived together for a couple of months, I was a student. The relationship was wonderful, he even offered to marry him. But at 21, I was unprepared. I went home, then for an internship in another country for a year, my contacts were lost. Many years have passed, I got married, gave birth, divorced. Last year I found him via the Internet, after a vacation in his country, but in a different place, not where he lives. Written off rarely, he seemed to be pleasantly surprised. A couple of weeks ago I sent him a funny video, communication went closer. He found out that I had a long vacation and offered to come to visit him. I agreed. I have already booked a tour, I am going to go to his country, alone, to live in a hotel. He expected that I would live right with him, he says that he was not married and now there is no serious relationship. I wrote every day. Last time 2 days ago. I answered. But silence answered me. Although I see that he read the message, was online both the day before yesterday and yesterday. I don’t want to impose, but his silence worries me. There was close communication and suddenly it was quiet. Although I went online. With what it can be connected? I do not understand. If you went online, then there is time to write. Why don't you write to me then? Should I wait any longer, or should I still ask what happened? At stake is a trip that was not too easy for me in terms of material and moral (is it worth it?) Costs.

Elena, what if a man specifically calls you by a different name? She has been meeting for three months and here for the second time she calls me Alexandra, although he does not have anyone in his acquaintances with that name and her ex-wife.

Elena, well, firstly, he is 21 years older than me, and secondly, we work with him and he helps me. We have known each other for a year, but we began to communicate closely for 4 months. I knew that he liked me, but I rejected all invitations to go out together. Began intimate communication from May 1, from the 5th, he decided to kiss me, but it started close right in June. In June, he introduced me to his father and the Sisters, in his town he told everyone that we were a couple. Yes, I repent that I got into his phone, but my suspicions were confirmed and I immediately told him that we were breaking up, he himself offered to sit down and talk, he said that he did not want to change his lifestyle and leave friends / girlfriends, I said that I didn’t either I will change. To which he said that well, I will change)))
We went to Italy to relax and he tried to do the whole trip for himself, I immediately said that I want to see otherwise I’m not going, he agreed. And on the trip, I again got into his phone and saw that he was his ex-wife offered to go to her town with him. She did not really agree, but he persuaded. I didn't say I read it, but I remembered it. And so, he said that he was going to that town for the things of his son, and I asked two or three times whether one was going or not. He said that one, in the evening, as he arrived, he offered to take a walk to see the Eclipse, and so by the way he said that she went with him. I was in shock and I didn’t tell him anything for two days, especially since he left for his town, but today I said everything that there can’t be half-truths in a relationship, he said that since I don’t trust him, that’s it.

I really need your advice.
I am 35 and so is the young man I met. Both he and I have two children from our first marriage, he brings them up himself (he did not explain the reason).
Both he and I live with mothers who help us raise children. We have been meeting for like half a year, but there are no specifics on his part, only a pleasant pastime. And he does not want to talk about the past, he is offended, and I am afraid to ask about the future.
I torment myself with thoughts that all this is not serious with us and from time to time I lock myself up, cry. And in the last conflict, I was also out of sorts and said that I could not meet with him because in bad mood, to which he said that he also had something to be sad about, a lot of his problems, I asked to tell about them, and he said that in this way I hurt him, making them think again that his Mom was very sick. And after that he does not call for the second day.
What to do? Who is wrong?
Who should take the first step?
Or wait for movements on his part, which will be confirmation that he needs me?

Good day! I can’t find a place ... I wrote to you once about a relationship with my man. Then everything was really good. But now, as from mid-September, I became wary. And I was not mistaken. Soon he is leaving for his city, a straightforward man and would immediately say that everything, to my question. But he wrote that everything is fine with us. After he came to the unit from a business trip, he informed me that he had arrived, after talking, he said that he would leave and there were 2 months left. I was upset and, of course, said that it hurt me, to which he replied that he did not want to hurt me and would come. For several times the meeting did not take place, he has no money, but he serves far from me. She noticed that only I write, she answers either coldly or very interestedly. Once in all the time I called, asked if it was convenient for him to talk now, he said to call back, I asked him to call back. Called back within 15 minutes or so. But alas, he stopped calling affectionately and stopped writing. And he writes himself after a week of my silence and just hello. How are you. I am tortured and exhausted by all this ((((Nerves are failing (((How to save it all? What should I do? Should I go to last meeting? if it happens at all.

Good morning! The meeting took place, but the conversation did not take place. There was communication for the fact that he would leave home soon, of course I burst into tears ... He told me to treat it like a business trip, that he would return, everything was fine and don’t worry. And I just want to hear, we are together as a couple. Only when next to him, I feel it, but without words everything is with us. What if I just came up with it myself and believe that we are together? (

The feeling that he just soothes and does not know himself whether he will come or not. Tell me please! So he asked me, and I was once on the mainland and in general in another city. Is it just a question, or maybe he is thinking about picking me up, how will he restore work after the army? Just after that, he sat and thought aloud that he needed to restore work and the car after the army ...

Good afternoon! I asked a couple of questions, wrote to him that I want a serious relationship with him. And if he does not, then let him answer directly. To which he wrote to me that we would meet and talk. But words failed to speak. We walked in an embrace, communication was for the fact that he would leave soon. He said not forever and treat it like a business trip ... He doesn’t say anything directly. Before that, I wrote to him that write to me right away what we have and if anything, I’ll just forget all this ... And nothing specific ... I’m already thinking about what to stop writing myself and just continue living my life. It will be necessary to write and call. In the beginning it was like this, but now it’s not like that… It hurts me…

Good afternoon, I really need your help.
The situation is such that I am married and have a difficult relationship with my husband. I have 2 children. Recently I met a former young man I’m 25, he’s 35. We sat very well in a cafe, agreed to meet on the weekends, I write first at the end of the week on the day of the meeting, he writes specifying the time, and we have already met 3 times. We agree on the next meeting at the end of the meeting. A busy man has a lot of work all the time, even during a meeting, he works through the phone, he also has a child and a spouse, but not officially. I understand that I’m falling in love with him, I’m very good with him, but I’m not very pleased that he doesn’t kiss me at all. But when we sit in a cafe, he always sits with me and close and bends over with his whole body to me, it seems to amuse me by gestures, I like him, but I don’t understand why he himself won’t take the initiative.
Tell me what should I do?

Family is the main thing and you need to work on yourself and relationships. My ex and I just left at the same time for others ... There are two children from him. And so we became unnecessary, and when we tried to get along with the former, it didn’t work out. Don't be stupid!!! Above all respect, love and appreciate each other. Try to offer something new to your husband, add new sensations + remember the best moments when he was breathtaking from you and you from him. Never saw or ask irritable questions! Play!!! Forget this life and routine and start playing different roles, be a little incomprehensible and interesting for your man. Everything will be fine with you if you try to become that very stranger, interesting and desirable!

I can’t stand it anymore (((And if you just think about the good? But really take me, here in a foreign city there is another guy to whom I definitely wouldn’t be able to answer either, because when I return to my city I have nothing and finances. The only thing he said was that he would restore work and that he needed to buy a car.

I decided to write as is. Without tantrums and accusations, as many people do. Silent. For now, let it be. Now I go to the gym, I set myself up for good. And then, that's enough from me, in the end, many dream, he even wrote at the beginning that it is impossible not to fall in love with this one and you want to press it to your heart. So, now it would be optimal to stop it all myself. Everything happens, but we can’t be enemies, we parted well. Calmly. We appreciate and respect each other, and this is no worse. I wish everyone mutual love and happiness, most importantly health! Appreciate yourself and love)

Hello! I have a very confused situation! I met a guy on the Internet, we live in different parts of the world. We fell in love with each other, but I had and still have a boyfriend. Therefore, I laughed off all his serious statements. He was very jealous of me. I wrote and called every day. I cut off our connection a bunch of times, but he brought me back. Then in July I started to ignore him, I was not in the mood to communicate and wanted to again finish it all. He said he felt so bad that he almost killed himself. We talked again, he asked me not to leave him, and then he began to ignore me, and when he got in touch he said that he thinks we need to end our communication. I thought that was all, but after a couple of days he asked to return everything as it is, I did not accept him, and for the next 2 months we either converged or diverged again. In September, at another quarrel, said that it turns out that he also had a girlfriend, but then he said that he did not love her, but only loved me. He told me to make a choice between a guy and him, and I chose a guy. From that moment on, we still communicate, but there is no more talk from him about anything serious, he still says that he loves me, but about serious relationship does not say anything. And in January I will finally come to his country, we agreed to meet. But I’m not so pleased that he also has someone, I constantly think, we’ll meet, spend time together, and then what? that's all? We have been talking like this for a year now, and he says that he would not spend a year on a person if he had not really fallen in love. But jealousy suffocates me so much, although I myself understand that I can’t offer him more yet, but at least I know that he wants something more ..

"If a man does not call, then he does not need it" - that's enough simple truth that every woman needs to learn. However, this opinion is not always plausible and reflects real essence. In this article we will understand why a man does not call. A man's view of this situation will help each girl to draw new conclusions about the stronger sex.

Desires - no, goals - no

It doesn't matter if there was one date between you or several. Women have one incredible feature that is beyond the control of male influence- creating an illusory world around you. While you have come to the decision that you are ready to date a man and build a serious relationship, your potential partner could change his mind and choose a suitable life partner.

The fair sex can decide in a few minutes whether a partner is suitable for her or not. Men can long time doubt, compare, choose and analyze. For the stronger sex, connecting your life with someone is a serious step that cannot be taken thoughtlessly and hastily.

What to do? It's the first one that doesn't ring. The man's view of this situation is quite simple: give him time. The girl also should not sit idly by. One call is enough to understand whether the chosen one is in doubt, or has completely cooled off towards you. If there is still a spark, then there is no need to impose or push. Learn to be patient and the wait will soon pay off.

If there is no fire, why call?

The fair sex asks the question: "Why doesn't a man call or write?" The man's view of this situation is quite transparent - duty calls are not for him. Not every chosen one is ready to endure total control from a woman answering calls every 15 minutes. For such men, as a rule, the phone is a device with which you need to call emergency services or contact essential person for something important and urgent.

What to do? Do not impose - you will not retrain a man and you will not be able to train him like a tame animal, having taught you to call you five times a day and exchange on-duty phrases. The guy will call himself when he has a serious conversation with you.

Playing on thin strings

Let's see why the man does not call. The look of a man is sometimes incomprehensible to the fair sex. Due to their naivety, girls sometimes do not notice the cunning game of "cat and mouse". In this situation, you need to understand that the guy knows perfectly well that you are ready to reveal your soul to him, so in his eyes you are nothing more than a fragile, but appetizing mouse that you need to play with before dinner. Such men behave confidently and experienced. They manipulate your patience and trust by deliberately ignoring the promise to call.

What to do? Do not forget about pride and pride. Your man, who is ready to devote his whole life to you, will never play with you, and certainly does not want to see you as a victim. Manipulators must be cut off immediately.

The truth is simple: he didn't like you

There is a simple answer to the popular women's question: "What could be the reasons why a man does not call." The look of a man shows the only truth: you are not his type and he does not see with you. later life. Let's be frank, self-confidence is good, but we should not assume that we are obliged to please everyone and everyone. After spending time on several dates, none of you can be sure that you will become a soulmate and live happily with each other. long years. Sometimes the first impression plays important role, especially when one of the chosen ones created an illusory image for you that does not correspond to reality.

What to do? If you are sure that this man was sent by fate, then you need to be assertive. Call the stronger sex on a second date and give him a chance to look at you from the other side. If after this date the man does not call you, then you can safely continue the search for a new chosen one. Men, as a rule, are stubborn, and it makes no sense to put pressure on them.

There's nothing more to wish for

It's no secret that every woman makes rash (or deliberate) mistakes. As a rule, there is a simple answer to the question: "Why doesn't a man call?". The look of a man suggests that after the first date the woman gave the man everything he wanted from her. Perhaps the chosen one was so attractive and interesting that you shared dinner and bed with him. The next day, as if by magic, the guy disappears and no longer appears in your life.

What to do? The answer is simple: if this situation is familiar to you, then you should reconsider your priorities. Perhaps sex on the first date should be made taboo, even if it's the most charming man in the world. As a rule, the stronger sex believes that if a woman gave herself to an unfamiliar chosen one, then this indicates her frivolity and accessibility.

Could be better

There is main reason in psychology, why a man does not call. The man's view is quite simple: he just didn't like sex. It doesn't matter if coitus happened on the first date or a few months later. This situation is divided into two fronts: the man is dissatisfied with you and was not fully satisfied; the man blames himself and believes that he could not satisfy you. In any case, the representative of the stronger sex does not recognize this woman, it is much easier for him to ignore the calls.

What to do? Calm down and analyze the situation. You will be lucky if a man is frank with you and admits what exactly did not suit him. In other cases, you just need to remember all the details of the evening. Perhaps, in a passionate outburst, you did not notice how you hurt your chosen one, or during sex you thought only about your pleasure, forgetting to give unforgettable minutes to your partner.

Pride Above All

Why doesn't a man call a woman? The look of a man sometimes shows us about his pride. If there was a conflict or a petty domestic quarrel between partners, then it is likely that for the next few days you will completely ignore each other. Here, too, the situation is divided into two fronts: the man does not consider himself guilty and is waiting for the first steps from his lady; the man admits his guilt and he is so ashamed that he cannot call and annoy the woman.

What to do? Analyze the situation. Sometimes pride can ruin a relationship, and any petty quarrel- lead to rupture. Think about whether the subject of the dispute is so important, because of which you and your chosen one stood up different sides barricade? If not, perhaps the first step towards reconciliation needs to be taken. A girl must understand that she is often the instigator of conflicts and it is stupid to demand regular apologies from a man for a partner. Try to take the first step, call your man, apologize. And then, when the relationship returns to normal, you can try to adequately talk and exhaust the problem.

You are not the navel of the earth

There is a clear opinion in psychology why a man does not call a woman. The look of a man proves that he simply does not need the fair sex. If you are dear to your partner, and he really appreciates you, worries and cares, then he can always find a few minutes in his busy schedule to notify you of employment and leave good news. The same applies to girls. If she does not call, then you should not have false hopes and build illusions - you are simply indifferent to your partner. Be sure, even if a man was abducted by alien creatures, his phone is dead, and there is not a single soul within a radius of 100 kilometers, he will still be able to warn you.

What to do? Be patient and designate yourself "waiting hours". Perhaps the representative of the stronger sex really had an accident and there is no way to contact you. This means that after a while he will definitely make himself felt. Your task is to pacify the anger and ardor within yourself, not to let anger and hatred flare up into a blue flame. If a call from a chosen one exceeds the "waiting hours", then most likely the man simply lost sight of you. In this case, you just need to take a deep breath and exhale and realize that with one more manipulator and indifferent partner less in your life.

Darling, shall we play?

Many girls ask themselves: "Why doesn't a man call, what are the reasons?". The look of a man shows that in nature there is a type who simply loves to play hide and seek. The rules are simple: today you spend wonderful evening, and the next day the chosen one disappears, blocking all contacts. For several weeks you go through several stages of hatred, and when you accept the situation and reconcile, then the missing partner miraculously reappears in your life and requires attention. Such a scheme can be repeated for a long time, and you can be sure that this circle will never open. Do you want to know why? It's easier than you think: you - convenient option for a man. He is like a free cat, he himself comes when there is not enough affection and attention, but also suddenly disappears when he misses other hands.

What to do? Do not have false hopes and do not make plans. true man, who will make you happy, will always be with you, and he does not need any games. Say "No!" manipulators and gamblers.

true truth

Now you know why a man does not call or write to a woman. The look of a man is not always pleasant and sweet. However, being at a conscious age, you must understand that pride and pride can save you from unnecessary ballast, which definitely cannot give you real happiness and love.

Learn to accept the truth for what it is, even if it is bitter and unpleasant. There are no reservations - you either inspired a man or you didn't. If the representative of the stronger sex liked you, then he will give you all the jewels of the world, wrap you in silk and give you If you did not suit the potential chosen one, then he can play with you, because you - comfortable woman, which is always an example, feeds and comforts when a man needs it. Love yourself and respect your feelings, then you can meet worthy person to suit you.